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Gogglebox AU S23E01 (2026)

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😹
Fun
Transcript
00:03It's a photo.
00:04How do you put it on solid again?
00:07Solid your phone.
00:08So is that just putting it...
00:09Just press it the other way.
00:13Every evening in Australia...
00:15We are here! Yeah baby!
00:17TV reaches over 12 million of us.
00:20What? Okay!
00:21That is incredible.
00:22But have you ever wondered what other people are watching?
00:25Yes or no? Answer it truthfully.
00:27Truly a donkey.
00:28Find out what people thought about what was on
00:31in the last seven days.
00:32Name one person that you know would like this.
00:34I love this show.
00:36There is zero depth to this show and you don't need it.
00:39It's a new year which means
00:41all the big reality shows are back.
00:43Yes! This is what I want to see.
00:45Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
00:47An old fave returned.
00:49Millionaire hot seat.
00:50Fronted by a new face.
00:52Rebecca Gibney! What?
00:54Plus, we checked out the drama
00:56that has the whole world talking.
00:58Heated rivalry!
01:00Here we go!
01:01This is a global phenomenon.
01:03What's he doing with this?
01:04Whoa! Whoa!
01:05The sausages might be sizzling.
01:08Park with an extra pillow, Jared!
01:09Go!
01:18Gogglebox is back for 2026.
01:20And over the break, a bit's been happening.
01:23In Melbourne, Simon got a new place.
01:26And Adam got a new do.
01:28Celia watched me shave my head.
01:30And for the next two weeks,
01:32whenever I would pick her up from daycare
01:34and I had a hat on,
01:35she would come over and then rip my hat off,
01:38point at me and laugh and tell her teachers,
01:40look, my daddy has no hair.
01:42On the Gold Coast, Nick and his wife are expecting.
01:46Oh, dude, now that we've got a baby on the way,
01:48I swear every day we get some new contraption
01:51that turns up at the door.
01:52That's a booby-pump, dude.
01:53Give it a crack.
01:55How does it work?
01:56Ah!
01:57Ah!
01:59And in Sydney, Mia, Bree and Laney
02:02are trying to find love.
02:03Well, on the apps now, you can do a two-for-one deal,
02:06so we could go as a pair.
02:07Double dates.
02:08Sorry?
02:09Double dates.
02:09What about triple date?
02:10Triple dates.
02:11Sticky dates!
02:13We're the sticky dates.
02:14That's not a good name for a first date.
02:16I don't want to be a sticky date.
02:18Oh!
02:20Dating shows, where we come to see true love blossom.
02:24Please!
02:25Alright, fine.
02:26Where we come to see a whirlwind of pain.
02:29Yes!
02:30And anger.
02:31Yes!
02:31And hate.
02:32Yes, yes, yes, yes!
02:35It's back, I guess.
02:36Oh, no.
02:38It's been three weeks since 18 strangers met
02:41and married at first sight.
02:44We've had our trials and tribulations.
02:46Trials and tribulations?
02:47It's been, what, a couple of weeks?
02:49How are we at this stage already?
02:51Life moves fast on maths.
02:53For example, Brooke has already dumped her husband, Chris.
02:56After watching Chris's unfiltered audition video.
03:00What turns you off?
03:02The fat people.
03:02Oh!
03:03He's making fun of fat people like he doesn't have ears like Dumbo.
03:07Why voice that?
03:08There's types of men that we don't like.
03:10Do we voice our opinion?
03:12Yes.
03:12Yeah.
03:13With Brooke gone home, it looks like she won't be able to attend this week's...
03:17Dinner table fee.
03:18For the second dinner party.
03:20Here we go!
03:21This is gonna go off.
03:22Time to ruin all your reputations once again.
03:26It's gonna be a big dinner party tonight.
03:27I definitely think that we're gonna be walking into the segregated vibes tonight.
03:34To the black man.
03:36She could've said divided room.
03:38She's trying to connect with him.
03:39Now that Chris has found himself in a marriage of one, the obvious thing to do would be to...
03:44Go home!
03:46Just go!
03:46I just wanna go home.
03:47Go home!
03:50What's he doing?
03:51He's not blacking out the cameras, is he?
03:54With chewing gum.
03:55Oh, he's putting gum on it there.
03:56He's put the chewing gum back in his mouth after taking it off the cameras.
04:00Of all the disgusting things that have happened on maps, that might be the most disgusting.
04:04I just can't...
04:06Don't wanna be doing this.
04:08He's acting like Shrek's got him locked up in a castle somewhere.
04:11Chris musters up the courage.
04:13No!
04:14But before he can answer the question...
04:17Where's your walrus?
04:19Oh, is she coming late?
04:21Is Brooke about to enter?
04:23No!
04:24Surprise bitches!
04:26Oh!
04:28Yes!
04:32No way!
04:34That's right.
04:34Brooke decided not to.
04:36Yahoo!
04:37A lot of me had a lot of unfinished business.
04:40Has she come to make things right with him or what?
04:42Oh!
04:42It wasn't to do with Chris.
04:44What?
04:44There's a lot of fake bitches.
04:47Did she suddenly just say that she's here not for the marriage and not for him but for other reasons?
04:51Exactly!
04:52Because sometimes the hatred one feels for one's partner is nothing on the hatred one feels for everybody else.
04:58Which I guess is kind of romantic.
05:00Relationships then and...
05:01I think Stella's trying to give a relationship advice after her two week relationship.
05:05Oh!
05:07I think you're a very rude bitch.
05:10Oh!
05:11Take it easy T-moo Delta Goodrum.
05:14Do not insult Delta Goodrum.
05:15Maybe she's the T-moo version.
05:16Not even T-moo.
05:17While you're at it, get the stripper boots off, babe.
05:20Oh!
05:21If you're going to buy stripper boots, buy 100% land.
05:24Oh!
05:25Then join by faux leather.
05:26Oh!
05:27Where'd you get them from?
05:29Tajay?
05:30What's wrong with Tajay?
05:31Loser!
05:34Loser!
05:35What's that movie called?
05:36Mean Girls.
05:37Mean Girls.
05:38Shut up, Alyssa.
05:39You ratchet idiot.
05:41Brooke is on a rampage.
05:42They need to kick her out.
05:44Yeah.
05:44This is good.
05:45Get out there.
05:46Yeah!
05:46But it's not just Brooke.
05:48As her combative approach to dinner party conversation spreads to some of her friends at the table.
05:53Why don't you get back in your kennel, babe?
05:55Yeah.
05:55Okay?
05:56Oh!
05:57So nasty!
05:59Things deteriorate.
06:00Babe, take your hair extensions out and chill.
06:02I'm getting so riled up right now.
06:04This is schoolyard stuff.
06:06Until eventually, it all goes...
06:08Boom!
06:11I feel like we're at a zoo and all the animals can talk.
06:14Yeah, there's hyenas.
06:15Hahaha.
06:17Hahaha!
06:19Actually, do you know what I want to try?
06:21You're in a fake relationship!
06:23Clap!
06:23Clap!
06:24Clap!
06:24And I hope your parents are really proud watching this.
06:28I just wanna try something.
06:29Yeah.
06:30T, leave me alone.
06:32Oh!
06:33Shut up!
06:33Oh!
06:35Oh!
06:36You lame bitch!
06:38179 over 110 there should be a medical warning at the start of this episode yeah this is dangerous
06:46hypertension hell broke loose can i just clarify that about like this has only been going for two
06:52weeks now like what's it gonna be like at the end oh bro that was so intense i hate this
07:03show oh i
07:04loved it oscar the grouch is looking at these people being like get out of the bin
07:19your very first haircut today oh my gosh no nappy new hair no dummy are you a big boy yeah
07:28no you're a
07:29baby you're a big boy now well he talks heaps better yeah he looks like a big boy yeah sunday
07:37on seven
07:38this season on australian idol australian idol bro brace thy ears oh my the auditions are continuing
07:46and they're all vying for a golden ticket to the top 30. i love the auditions they're my favorite
07:53hope we get to see some ones yeah i want to see the stinkers well you've come to the right
07:57place
07:57thanks all the memories thanks all the memories wow this is what i want to say
08:07jeez louise i'm gonna say no you think well what about this guy
08:19how about a duo this is fun yeah especially when you're out of flute oh it's a variety show the
08:38come out they're on the wrong show they should be on australia's got talent okay let's go back to the
08:43singing
08:47if you ever want to torture me and find out information lock me up in a room with her
08:52help me so no for me but i appreciate what you just did thank you guys thank you bye-bye
09:05okay next
09:06let's go 9 16 a.m and we're in a clubbing outfit love this outfit she's one of those simply
09:12irresistible
09:12you know those girls all those things what are you gonna sing singing some adele oh wow beautiful
09:22voice the voice is phenomenal but i can't look at anything but that freaking flick of hair
09:32ticket she's got the look she's got the voice yeah send her through that's all good that's all good
09:38but but but but but what i didn't expect a young beautiful girl to come in and sing old sad
09:46lady
09:46songs what old adele is not old pick a song that actually shows us who you are simply irresistible
09:55and come back and re-audition really that's bs thank you oh they're going hard it's gonna be a good
10:02one
10:03next or a bad one my name's harry lamb harry he looks like ken good looking man he's gonna get
10:08in
10:08because he looks like a hemsworth he plays a guitar he doesn't even have to sing i'm doing eye of
10:13the
10:13tiger by survivor that's a great song i have the tiger which is a little bit of a fight please
10:18please don't sing get you going kind of pulled it back the other way it's a little bit more folky
10:23what's folk oh you know back on the street darren lockyer could sing this is what he'd sound like
10:34when the distance sounds like he's trying to a poo while he sings yeah no sorry you don't muck around
10:42with a good song i loved him i reckon he's gonna get through i'm gonna say yes oh just not
10:48gonna be
10:48good enough for me to give you a yes it's gonna be two no's marshall's gotta say no you can't
10:53pick him
10:53you're great eye candy marshall i don't know if a 70 year old lady's allowed to say that a 26
10:58year old
10:58boy's hot you know he's good looking but he's not my type it's a yes from me there you go
11:03see
11:04eye candy no wonder it's so shit oh but hang on there's still sophie thank you oh she's back let's
11:11see how she goes with her new contemporary song what's she gonna do tainted love oh it's an older
11:17song than freaking adele that's much better i love you but you hurt me so he just wanted to say
11:35the bit of sass yeah baby yes yes yes yes thank you well done betty boo she'll get a golden
11:42ticket for
11:42won't she not yet because now the judges need to choose between her and him oh the battle of the
11:50beauties the golden ticket i'm backing sophie oh i'm backing harry is going to be awarded it's going
11:57to be sophie it has to be sophie to simply irresistible both of you oh yeah dead heat
12:08atkins i don't know do you love it or not i love you love it it's my favorite another season
12:16of a show that i'm not going to remember who wins
12:32in melbourne lee and keith have just celebrated a milestone did you enjoy our 40th anniversary
12:37cruise yes that was good comedy cruise yes the cruise was fun the night time no that was boring
12:44bed sheet well we'll be my 41 and in sydney jads also celebrated his 40th birthday happy birthday to
12:55you happy birthday to you you smell like a monkey and it looks like one too
13:07on sunday we caught up with ten's favorite jungle competition
13:12it's giving survivor ten's other favorite jungle competition
13:18i love this show
13:24i'm actually loving i'm a celeb this year keeps going this show it's surprising everyone i know
13:29we're going to get a bunch of celebrities in a jungle some feel-good moments eating some weird stuff
13:36and that's it oh don't forget the hosts g'day i'm robert irwin and i am
13:40saucepan whisperer julia morris julia looks fantastic doesn't she look at her i watched this
13:45show purely for robert julia last night we ended on yet another
13:49oh my god
13:50wow
13:52is it just me or is rob erwin jacked
13:55robert irwin has been doing some push-ups yeah all right okay calm down because there's an
14:02elimination challenge happening between ex-maps bride syrell oh syrell taking on the jungle she's
14:10getting eaten by a lot yeah and mia favola who is she is she from maths as well she's afl
14:16legend
14:16brendan favola's daughter money must be tied for the favolas at the moment yeah what's the challenge
14:21gonna be it's gotta be something gross right not quite each of you will be shown a five-letter word
14:26like zebra and then they have to eat the zebra not quite we'll choose two letters to remove to make
14:33the word as hard as possible to guess is that seriously the game i love we are playing wordle
14:40wordle in the jungle dude what happened to like a snake pit or like a bathtub full of cockroaches or
14:45something like that oh this is just as good isn't it syrell what you're looking at there
14:50is mia's first word hyena okay so this isn't a hard game cyrell can't spell so she's already at
14:56a disadvantage here poor darling what letters would you remove from hyena probably i'm thinking to burn
15:00number two and number four oh wow wow what the hell holy moly at least they've made it a little
15:09bit dramatic with the fire your category is animals 30 seconds starts now that's easy mia
15:15hyena it rhymes with mia hyena mia hyena it rhymes it doesn't rhyme mia hyena hyena hyena hyena is
15:26correct oh wow oh my god she's like a professor this is incredible i don't think it's that incredible
15:33i'm sorry roll well in the final showdown they're taking away three letters three letters and its fastest
15:39wins wow eagle eagle eagle incorrect oh that's a bit harsh don't worry there's still plenty of celebs
16:00left back at camp right celebrities come on good old george columbaris i love george columbaris has
16:06been really good on this he's a dickhead no he is i met him in real life and when i
16:12said hello and
16:12he stopped me three of you will be competing maybe he didn't hear you i'll face the face with him
16:19to the ultimate porridge cooker porridge oats and water how much do you want to be here george has been
16:27waiting for this moment his whole life he's really just trying to relive his time on masterchef isn't he
16:32yeah luke i score you an 11 out of 10. yay luke and then it was time for letters from
16:41home oh we're
16:43about to pull on some heartstrings aren't we i just miss my family so much oh how long should we
16:48go for
16:49six months yeah george god we have missed you all right calm down george it's got to be tough to
16:56be
16:56away from your family i'm about to be saying dear kate so proud of you stay there stay there anyway
17:03on to the next challenge to the camp olympics sorry what camp olympics this is going to be epic what
17:09are
17:09we doing here guys they've gone proper cuckoo right using your rock it is who can get closest to the
17:15circle i like seeing them all have fun like this together no i want someone to eat something and or
17:20get eaten by a snake i have not seen one anus on this show yet not one single one
17:28that was very very very good the whole reason i watch is to see celebrities get humiliated
17:36and i didn't see anyone get humiliated i'm a celebrity get me out of here
17:50chinese new year it's effectively a new year's eve that spans two weeks there's so many things that
17:57we cannot do in the two weeks i can't cut my hair for two weeks no vacuuming or sweeping correct
18:03you
18:03cannot vacuum or clean any part of your house because it's effectively sweeping all the good
18:08luck out of the house i see you've already started monday on sbs we got cooking with a household name
18:16of masterchef fame oh this fella my mum loves this guy what's his name is adam lou no adam low
18:24or
18:24something like that or low law not quite leo leo as in coast leo definitely not hello i'm adam leo
18:31and
18:31welcome to the cook up leow leow that's the one if you ever forget just think of a meow and
18:36add an l
18:36leow sure the cook up i have every single one of his cookbooks do you really in this ep adam
18:43leow is
18:44ringing in the lunar new year does luna mean moon yeah happy new year to both of you for me
18:49chinese
18:50new year is about family and eating to excess you always have a whole steamed fish you always have
18:58chicken with the legs and the head on oh that sounds lovely it's like at easter we've got the
19:02margarita and then at new year's we've got the basilopita it's actually all about chinese new year not
19:08patosh tabouli no it's more schnitzels spaghetti i made a pie the other day never mind adam is joined
19:18by comedian annie louis and fellow masterchef star brendan pang these masterchef contestants have more
19:24success than australian idol contestants proper do you guys have a reunion dinner for lunar new year what
19:30do you mean a family in the lab world there is no reunion because there's never any division you need
19:35to
19:35be a part for there to be a reunion looking at the ingredients i have in front of me is
19:39that salmon
19:39not a salmon please no salmon what do you think i'm making oh he's saying like the prosperity salad
19:44oh my yi sang that's that's our family that's our family what's yi sang so it is basically a raw
19:50fish
19:50salad oh god i can't do raw fish because it feels like i'm eating my own tongue you have the
19:55big platter
19:55of all the ingredients and they're separate and then you put chopsticks in it and you throw it high
20:00in the air do they throw the food in the air is insane like a salad you toss salad don't
20:04you
20:04trust it out the window is it the higher the better yeah yeah that used to be your saying the
20:08higher the better so it's the year of the horse so i'm going to try and make this platter
20:13look like a horse making us a horse head this is a bit of godfather action yeah let me just
20:18show
20:19you guys this one there is that it yep that's it we could do that i could do that like
20:23is that
20:23looking like a horse cute looks like a dog to me i squint my eyes like this until my head
20:28but i thought
20:29i'll show you a few of the slightly easier animals that we've had to make over the years so this
20:33was
20:33year of the snake wow whoa that was heaps better than his horse this was year of the dog oh
20:39that's
20:40cute you're the rabbit and you're the chicken okay i'm just going to say now the year of the horse
20:46is the worst one he's done i'm going to agree this is my uncle this is why he wins every
20:50single year
20:50oh no this was year of the dragon wow where's the dragon i can't see a dragon i can't see
20:55that's a
20:56dragon look at that guys that is incredible no it just looks like a platter of freaking vegetables
21:00no come on start cooking stuff the family reunion rolls on it's brendan and annie's turn to cook
21:05love it he's got this show where everybody cooks for him yet he's the chef yeah he just organized
21:11some salad annie what are you making for our reunion dinner i'm making sweet potato donuts sweet potato
21:16donuts well this is nothing i'm going to eat at the moment no you're not eating any of this you're
21:20starving we're going to use this as the tester one you'll see if the oil is ready think about this
21:24she's already made mashed potato which takes a lot of effort now she's breaded it and deep fried it
21:31mashed potato takes a lot of effort it does have you ever made mashed potato yeah just boil the water
21:37and throw the potato in there peel the potato cut the potato mash the potato i'm a one-step guy
21:43put it in the airfryer brendan how about you i'm making mauritian fried noodles what are they i mean it's
21:49like chinese stir-fried noodles basically i'll eat that i have to fry when we go to chinese keith
21:53if they pulled up a spring roll or a dim sing you'd be excited yeah brendan these noodles look
21:59spectacular oh my god that looks so delicious oh my god honestly it's good but it's something you can
22:05get at like bankstown food court show me the balls crack open the balls all right annie i'm going to
22:10try
22:10a donut all right i'm not a fan of these balls this is how to make children cry give them
22:14a donut when
22:15they bite into it a sweet potato oh yeah a nice chew to it oh my god how do i
22:19get invited to that
22:20table i just want to see some good salad tossing and we're doing this a little bit backwards but
22:24this is my year of the horse yi sung salad now we're going to watch adam lee or toss a
22:28salad on sbs
22:29and then that august goes over the top there do you reckon he's tossed the salad before yeah they say
22:35you have to toss a salad once a year for luck oh adam thanks for watching the cook up toss
22:39that salad
22:40i'll see how it's done happy new year happy new year here you go sex before soccer does it again
22:50happy new year adam i'll eat your prawns and some of your meat but that's about it oh like when
22:56i got
22:56that stir-fry um meat and onions from the chinese joint yeah you ate all the meat and left me
23:01with the
23:01onions yeah well i thought you liked the onions i'd like a bit of meat as well jesus put that
23:06out again no
23:21you can you believe i've been looking everywhere and i can't find any black gnomes really no black
23:29gnomes i went to bunnings the other day and the biggest black gnome i could find was this oh
23:36i reckon if we put a little pointy hat on you you'd look like a big black man
23:42thursday on the abc we heard a familiar tune
23:45i love this show i love this show too we all love this show and this time there's a new
23:53twist
23:53transformation we're not building a house from scratch we're doing renos exactly right and for
23:59this episode's first renovation we're in the eclectic melbourne suburb of balaclava i didn't know they
24:05had a market at bells bells bells bellaclava and our first renovators a couple isabel and paul isabel
24:12and paul met through work okay that's nice she's an account management executive he's a company
24:18director then they got out at a cold play concert and isabel and paul will be renovating a century old
24:23former hat factory i love it what's not to love that's it yeah it's a home they do that in
24:32brunswick
24:32and all that kind of stuff the old warehouses factories yeah they turn the houses they're all
24:36over the joint now lee it looks dirty the plan is to create different zones for living not with walls
24:42but with materials and light really no walls material on the ground floor well i can see a
24:48wall there which is a part-time office and part-time guest wing there's a wall there and there's a
24:53wall
24:53there they'll add a courtyard with a blingy brass water feature i'd rather have a garage so i could
24:58park my car and bring in light via a huge hole two stories up we love huge holes speak for
25:06yourself
25:06kevin on the floor above god i'm getting vertigo following all this and a huge shiny brass brass yes
25:13brass brass kitchen a brass kitchen will act as gathering spots is that pure gold or something
25:19brass what were you listening to finally on the upper mezzanine level oh my god they're going up again
25:26this is unbelievable this is expensive this is a rebuild it's not a reno it's a reno it's a rebuild
25:33it's not a rebuild because it's got the same perimeter no but you can rebuild inside it that's
25:38a renovation yeah okay okay let's just get up to sydney to meet our second renovator ian scotch has
25:45had a few big moments of his own it looks like me i came out here when i was 26
25:49that looks like me
25:50that looks like me kate i used to wear the same shorts that's not me i like those pants and
25:57went on
25:57to become a high-flying manager director okay we get it he's rich like very rich great wall of china
26:03look how many people on him but why walk it yeah and ian will be transforming an iconic paddington
26:08terrace the terraces come up really nice wants to give him a bit of love i couldn't think of anything
26:13worse than living in the corridor that he bought in 2005 for 1.125 million dollars oh my god oh
26:20he
26:21nailed the bargain let's see the average house price in paddington right now oh i wouldn't do that if
26:25i were you 4.18 million dollars eat the rich well if you don't like that you're really not gonna
26:32like hearing what he's got planned for the top floor a room purpose built for ian's prized model
26:37train network what he's got a whole room for his trains in paddington that's right in paddington
26:44he's got a whole room for his trains yep his train set room is worth more than my house like
26:50i said
26:50best not to think about it what are you oh let's just skip to the end of the renovation it's
26:55a
26:55rebuild whatever ian welcome back you look incredible are you white pants uh can we hurry
27:01this up i've got a bowl i have no idea what i'm about to get myself into all right i'm
27:06so keen to see
27:10that looks i know it's not fantastic no looks like a 1970s backpackers on toowoomba oh i like that
27:19you have a hole in your entry what is that peekaboos that's just stupid how did they get in there
27:25here we go oh piss off if i walked into an old white man's house and that started moving i'd
27:30be
27:30running the hell out of there wow there's nowhere to sit so you've still got to come back upstairs
27:35anyway and don't forget to shut that otherwise you'll fall down and in the loft oh here we go
27:40the train room show us the choo choos whoa oh my god that's amazing oh it's mind-blowing anything
27:48miniature i'm obsessed with it's not often a woman says that anything miniature she's in love with
27:52but anyway how much was it about 1.6 million to renovate for me it's money well spent because
28:00this is kind of my forever home oh it is his forever home because who's buying this and then
28:04it's back down to melbourne to see the transformed hat factory absolutely come on in oh i'm eager to
28:11see how this one turned out oh that's horrible it's giving aquatic scent of showers i feel like
28:19i'm walking into the casino in town you come through the gold then i go with the jackpot on
28:23the dragon link machine you meet the gold fountain over here it looks like a urinal and the sound now
28:29you're going to lay in bed and hear that water go on and all you're going to do is keep
28:32getting up
28:32going the toilet and that was the whole intention of it right imagine you turn that off it'll be
28:37that moment when you turn your range hood off you're like thank god and upstairs the elephant in
28:42the room brass kitchen looks like that is the wow factor that is the wow factor yeah wow i'm leaving
28:49wow i'm not gonna buy it don't touch it it just looks dirty that would do my head in it's
28:54definitely
28:56not a material for someone who wants it pristine don't have kids can you imagine fingerprints all the
29:01time you sort of touch it you get the finger mark don't touch the bench but that's okay for us
29:06don't have anyone over i really enjoyed the show was that really a grand design but yeah
29:12they were both hideous those houses yeah i truly wouldn't want any of them you don't have to like
29:17it they're living there it's up to them yeah but i can have an opinion i can say it's
29:25that's okay
29:25so
29:25so
29:51Hey, you know the sides on the toilet, right?
29:53You know they're designed so you can like wee onto them so you don't make as much noise
29:59as what you just made going to the toilet?
30:01No, you're supposed to pee into the water.
30:02Why?
30:03Because it absorbs the spray.
30:05Why else would there be water there?
30:07You don't need to make so much noise while you're doing a pee.
30:09Agree to disagree.
30:11I didn't wash my hands.
30:13Ah, goddammit.
30:16Monday night on Hey You, we dived into a new season of Below Deck Down Under.
30:21I've been waiting for a new season of this.
30:23You just know there's going to be drama.
30:26Yep.
30:26And we're back on a luxury yacht with Captain Jason.
30:30I like Captain Jason.
30:31He's very handsome, isn't he?
30:32Ready to go.
30:33Sexy Captain.
30:34Speaking of sexy...
30:36Oh, it's Benny.
30:36Remember Benny the Crazy Chef?
30:38Come here, I am back.
30:39He has not aged well.
30:41It has been about six years since I have worked on a yacht.
30:45Why?
30:45Where'd you come from, rehab?
30:46And here to help Ben is Sous Chef Alicia.
30:49Home sweet home.
30:50Oh, they have got a sous chef now.
30:52Yeah, but she can't actually cook.
30:55Oh my goodness.
30:57This is like when I'm trying to cook in the kitchen and the kids want to help.
31:01And back to help the guests is Chief Stew Daisy.
31:04Oi, I'd be a good Chief Stew.
31:06You'd get caught up with partying with the guests.
31:09Yeah.
31:10And for the first charter...
31:12Who are our guests?
31:12Yes.
31:13The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.
31:15Oh-ho!
31:16No!
31:16Shit!
31:18The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City!
31:19It's a crossover episode.
31:21You're joking.
31:22The two most hectic reality shows combining.
31:26This is going to be so good.
31:27Yee!
31:28The Housewives are notorious for being over the top.
31:31They're a freaking nightmare.
31:33This is not going to be easy at all.
31:35Oh, no shit.
31:38Oh, they're coming down now.
31:40Bring it on, baby.
31:41Throw those lines, boys!
31:43We're ready to set sail!
31:44Here we go.
31:45Rich bitches celebrate!
31:47Oh, okay.
31:48What?
31:49What?
31:49Oh, my God.
31:50Did you guys put Dr. Pepper on the boat for me?
31:52What?
31:53Need some conditioner.
31:54Can you help her with her hair?
31:55What?
31:55What?
31:56Do you just have them bring my water up?
31:57Of course.
31:58What?
31:58You want the waiters to drink your water too?
32:00Yeah, spit it back in your mouth.
32:01Ooh!
32:03Andrea, are you throwing up?
32:04What did it sound like?
32:06Lord.
32:07I am going to clean the toilet.
32:10Oh!
32:11These women are...
32:13Unhinged!
32:14Is there anyone that could come unpack our bags?
32:17What?
32:17Unpack the bags?
32:18They can't get their own clothes out.
32:20Not just their clothes.
32:21What's she found?
32:23What is this?
32:24A cucumber.
32:25She just unpacked a cucumber.
32:26What's the cucumber for?
32:30Why not just take a deal?
32:31Let's see what's happening in this room.
32:33Hold on.
32:34Hold on.
32:34I'm sorry.
32:36Oh!
32:37Oh!
32:37Oh, she's topless.
32:39What?
32:39Did we just see nipple?
32:41No!
32:42What's she lost?
32:43A nipple cover?
32:44What's a nipple cover?
32:45It's like a sticky little cover that you put just over your nipple.
32:48Oh!
32:48This is my last floor.
32:50The nipple cover is off somewhere.
32:52Oh, get stuffed.
32:55All crew, all crew.
32:56A nipple cover is missing.
32:58Attention everyone.
32:59We're after a couple of nipple covers.
33:01It's getting nice and cold out there.
33:02A bit windy.
33:03Just, we need to cover up.
33:04It's knocking at my door.
33:06Jenna, come in.
33:07Did you find the nipple cover?
33:09Oh!
33:11No!
33:12Clap it up.
33:14How's that for service?
33:15They also want service from Captain Jason.
33:18Oh, no.
33:19What type of a service is that going to be?
33:22Um, this.
33:24Oh, my God!
33:25Where are you holding?
33:26Where is her head?
33:29In his bum?
33:30In his butt?
33:31Oh, my God!
33:32There's one thing these girls have, and that's class.
33:34Yeah, they're drowning in it.
33:35Now, it's time to dry off and head to dinner.
33:37All crew, all crew.
33:39We are good for 7.30 dinner.
33:41Oh, okay.
33:42First night of the charter.
33:43Open sesame.
33:44Hi!
33:45Daisy!
33:46I reckon they'll be the world's biggest argument going on tonight.
33:48Well, maybe not.
33:49There's other people at the table you're mad at that you are not...
33:52Never mind.
33:52Who are you mad at?
33:54Let the party start!
33:56You go from zero to...
33:58Are you...
33:59Whoa!
33:59Now, this is the real housewives I've been waiting for.
34:03Are you serious?
34:04Cheers!
34:05Oh, my God!
34:06Oh, my God, they smashed glasses.
34:08Someone's got to clean that up.
34:09These housewives are...
34:10Absolutely insane.
34:11What gave it away?
34:13I am over this.
34:15Poor Daisy.
34:16I'd lock myself in the freezer.
34:17I take my apron off and I just go out into the ocean and let myself go.
34:22You have let yourself go, shouldn't I?
34:27That met my expectations.
34:28Yeah.
34:28My expectations were high.
34:30Sorry, but whose idea was to get their housewives together on a yacht?
34:33The husbands would probably sent them on this thing to get them away from them.
34:36Because that's what I'd be doing.
34:37Freedom!
34:38And then change a dress, sell the house before they get back.
34:56At the Del Pachitras, Wendell has taken charge of Vesti's hen's night.
35:00Here are the rules.
35:01It's very simple, yeah?
35:02Back at the hotel room by 9 o'clock.
35:04No drinking, no partying, no clubbing.
35:06If you want a stripper, we'll send Dad.
35:08If you want Vesti to be in bed by 9 o'clock, definitely send Dad.
35:12I'll come with my striptease and a cup of coffee and a cheesecake and do the jiggle.
35:17Channel 10 has recently brought back...
35:19Oh, shit, yeah.
35:21...a classic game show.
35:23Millionaire Hot Seat.
35:25Is this a new host?
35:27Yeah, baby.
35:28Do you know who the host is?
35:29No.
35:29Hello, welcome to Millionaire Hot Seat.
35:31It's Rebecca.
35:33Rebecca Gibney.
35:34What?
35:35Australia's mum.
35:36Why do they shaft Eddie?
35:37Was he racist again?
35:39Will one of these six hopefuls go all the way?
35:42I love the weirdos that have to smile and wave.
35:44Kirstie Mann is a podiatrist...
35:46Is a podiatrist the one that looks after vaginas?
35:48No, they look at feet.
35:50So unless you've got your foot stuck in a...
35:52Oh, never mind.
35:53It's time to play...
35:55Deal or no deal?
35:56Oh, wrong show.
35:57A traditional children's party game is pin the tail on the what?
36:02Donkey!
36:03Boo!
36:04Milo's off to a cracker.
36:07Pin the tail on the...
36:09I feel...
36:10I know this one.
36:11Why are you pretending to think?
36:14There'd be something wrong if I didn't.
36:15Stop talking and just answer the question.
36:17D donkey.
36:18Correct for $100.
36:19Are these questions written by five year olds?
36:21No, they're just very easy at the beginning.
36:23What was a popular name for the peaceful ethic promoted by hippies?
36:27Okay, a little bit before my time.
36:30Um, born in the 60s.
36:32Oh, just say the answer.
36:34But I feel I know this.
36:36Stop explaining your answers and just say the answer.
36:40Again, something wrong if I didn't.
36:41Got the hair.
36:42Look at the timer.
36:43Does that not give him anxiety?
36:44Let's lock in a whale power.
36:46Just made it.
36:47With one second to go.
36:49I want him to lose because of the time he takes for answer.
36:52Fuck!
36:53Hailing from the Himalayas, Sherpas are renowned for what skill?
36:57Climbing mountains.
36:59A. Camel herding.
37:00B. Deep sea diving.
37:01C. Ice fishing.
37:03D. Mountaineering.
37:04This one I do not know but I'm going to guess C.
37:07The Himalayas, they're mountains obviously.
37:10Oh.
37:11So something you can do in the mountains is...
37:14I think it's C.
37:16Ice fishing?
37:17Could be A.
37:18Mountaineering, let's lock in D.
37:20Mountaineering.
37:20D is correct.
37:22We've got 300 bucks.
37:23Yeah but so would everybody else.
37:26Surely.
37:26No.
37:27And as the questions start to get harder...
37:29I might pass.
37:30Absolutely.
37:31The contestants can pass to the next person.
37:34Who is the first female artist to have had number one albums in the UK over five consecutive
37:39decades?
37:40It's got to be Madonna.
37:42Madonna.
37:42Kylie Minogue.
37:43Kylie Minogue.
37:44Kylie Minogue.
37:45Um...
37:46It's not Kylie.
37:47Kylie Minogue.
37:49Can't be Kylie Minogue.
37:50The gays love Kylie.
37:51I'm going to go with Kylie.
37:53I swear to God if it's Kylie Minogue I will have to return my gay card.
37:56It was of course.
37:58Our very own Kylie Minogue seems...
38:00Yeah!
38:01Gay card.
38:02I'm heterosexual now.
38:04Yeah.
38:04I thought you said shirt.
38:06The tallest mountain in our solar system, Olympus Mons, is on which planet?
38:10Uranus.
38:11A.
38:11Venus.
38:12B.
38:13Mars.
38:13Mars.
38:14There's a mountain in other places.
38:17Mars.
38:17C.
38:17Jupiter.
38:18Jupiter.
38:19D.
38:19Neptune.
38:19Have we ever been to Neptune?
38:21I'm going to lock in C please.
38:23Jupiter.
38:24I'm just asked if we've ever been to Neptune.
38:26It was actually B.
38:27It was Mars.
38:28Oh, it's Mars.
38:29What?
38:29Oh no.
38:31He's out.
38:32But each time someone answers incorrectly, the prize money drops.
38:36It was D. Talon.
38:38Until we end up with the final question, worth...
38:41$50,000.
38:43Oh, here we go.
38:44Sepia is a natural pigment derived from which marine animals?
38:50A.
38:50Sea snails.
38:51B.
38:51Horseshoe crabs.
38:53C.
38:53Cuttlefish.
38:54I could be cuttlefish.
38:55Sea snails.
38:56D.
38:57Sea urchins.
38:57Sea urchins are sea urchins!
38:59I know this 100%.
39:03Sepia...um...
39:03I've studied this before.
39:05Like I haven't studied it, but I've read it.
39:07I would put my new home on this.
39:10Sea cuttlefish.
39:11Oh, you idiot!
39:13You've locked in the sea, cuttlefish.
39:15Oh, poor guy.
39:17It is sea cuttlefish.
39:19Oh!
39:21What?!
39:22You've just won $50,000.
39:24Woo!
39:25Sea cuttlefish!
39:26Do it again!
39:2750 genos!
39:29Thank you so much!
39:30Oh my God!
39:30I reckon that that fact might be wrong.
39:33We'll see you next time on Millionaire Month.
39:36Say goodbye!
39:36So glad that show's back.
39:38I love it.
39:39Sepia comes from...
39:40I actually really like Rebecca Gibney.
39:43Yeah.
39:43She's a good host.
39:45Sepia comes from...oh, cuttlefish.
39:47You are...
39:48You are wrong!
39:50Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
39:52I've said it wrong.
39:52Can Sepia come from a sea?
39:55You're teaching the kids all the wrong stuff.
40:10You know like all those dating shows when like one of the guys comes on and he's like
40:1532 and blah, blah, blah.
40:17Yeah!
40:18And everyone's loving him.
40:20And then he goes, yeah, like I live with my mum.
40:22And everyone goes, ooh, red flag.
40:24You're gonna be that red flag!
40:26This week, we caught up with a hot new HBO series set in the world of professional
40:32ice hockey.
40:33Fans are hoping for something hot on the ice.
40:36This is the drama series everyone's been talking about.
40:41Heated rivalry.
40:42Here we go.
40:43This is the global phenomenon.
40:45Women are going crazy for it as well, not just the gays.
40:48That's right.
40:49And what's got everyone talking is the simmering tension between the two leading men.
40:54First, you've got Ottawa's own Shane Hollander.
40:56I love that this series has a strong, hot Asian lead.
41:00This is the kid with the highest hockey IQ out there.
41:03Incredibly smart and incredibly fast.
41:05That is such an Asian thing to be the top of what you do.
41:09But you'll still never be good enough for mum and dad.
41:11No.
41:12Then you've got Russia's Ilya Rosanoff.
41:14Strong on the puck and a strong skater.
41:16So are Canada's best player Shane Hollander versus Russia's best player Ilya Rosanoff.
41:22On the ice, they're intense rivals.
41:24But it's off the ice that things are really starting to heat up.
41:27Whoo!
41:29We will be seeing each other a lot.
41:31Oh.
41:32Ilya's manspreading.
41:33That is just a camera angle on a crutch, isn't it?
41:37Oh, a wink.
41:38Any vibes going on here?
41:39What do you reckon, undercurrent city?
41:41Who were these people when I was young?
41:43He went playing hockey.
41:46Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
41:48Oh!
41:50Can I grab that remote?
41:53Thanks.
41:54There we go.
41:55Pass it back.
41:56Fingers?
41:57Oh, yes.
41:58There you go.
41:59Thanks.
42:02I can see how it happens.
42:03Well, you're about to see a whole lot more.
42:06Now we're in the showers.
42:07Oh, okay.
42:08We love a good shower scene.
42:10Oh, yes!
42:12He does Pilates.
42:13That's a Pilates tush.
42:14Pass me that extra pillow, Jared.
42:19Oh, is he checking him out?
42:20Cardinal sin of the shower.
42:21Don't look down.
42:22I swear when we've gone and played paddle and had a shower,
42:24you were looking at me like that.
42:26I was looking at you.
42:27I was like, how can he find his asshole through all that hair?
42:31What's he doing with this?
42:32Whoa.
42:32That could be his rubbing light.
42:34Whoa!
42:35Not here.
42:35The sausages might be sizzling.
42:40What is your room number?
42:41Oh, he wants his room number.
42:441410?
42:45He gave him his room number.
42:46I think that's a code for come over to my room.
42:49Just told him his hotel room.
42:51I don't think that's a code at all.
42:52Well, if I come to 1410 tonight...
42:54I might open.
42:55I might knock.
42:56Oh, yeah.
42:56What?
42:58You need to settle down, Sarah.
43:01Here we go.
43:02They're coming over to his hotel room.
43:03Yep.
43:03He hasn't even got time to YouTube how to douche.
43:06Maybe he'll learn through trial and error.
43:08Oh, that's very messy, Jared.
43:10We've all been there.
43:11Not me.
43:12Not the poor man.
43:13He's going in.
43:14Oh, my God.
43:16I put your my chicken up.
43:18Want to sit?
43:19Mm-hmm.
43:20Not really.
43:21Wow, wow, wow.
43:23Got you up against the wall.
43:24Shut up!
43:25Yeah, take control.
43:26I'm talking to Bob with a TV show.
43:30Top's coming off.
43:31Belt's undone.
43:32Ah, the memories.
43:33What are being skinny?
43:34Skinny.
43:35Young.
43:36Desired.
43:41What's he doing down there?
43:42Where's he going to put it?
43:43Where do you think he's going to put it?
43:44Oh.
43:46Oh.
43:46Oh.
43:47Oh.
43:47Oh, hello.
43:48Oh, here we go.
43:48Love this.
43:49Don't love that you guys are here while I'm watching it.
43:53Oh.
43:54Come here, baby.
43:55I'm glad I'm not watching this with my parents.
44:00I've died today.
44:01It was 25 degrees.
44:03It's boiling right now.
44:04Oh.
44:05Oh.
44:05Oh.
44:06Oh.
44:15No one knows where to put their hands.
44:18All right, Yoshi.
44:19Oh.
44:19I get it.
44:20The heated rivals were on with each other.
44:24Then, as the hockey season finishes, Hollander tries to work out where they stand.
44:28So what is it then?
44:29But discovers Rosanoff isn't on the same page.
44:32Not everything is about you, Hollander.
44:34Oh, first love is Tiff.
44:36I guess I thought maybe we...
44:39Never mind.
44:40Oh my God.
44:41You see, this is more than just a hookup.
44:44Let's go next season.
44:47It's like they just don't know how to deal with what they're feeling.
44:49What is it with men?
44:50Just say how you feel.
44:53He's not interested.
44:54Pose not clarity.
44:55Yes.
44:57How are you used to?
44:58How's your body temperature?
44:59Do you want the air cooler?
45:00Well, I was going to adjust my pants.
45:03Oh, come on.
45:03Heavy on the heated.
45:04Low on the rivalry.
45:06Big time.
45:06So, what are we doing tomorrow?
45:09Let's watch episode two tomorrow night together as a fam.
45:11What do you think now?
45:12Sounds like a great day.
45:13Yeah.
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