00:00I want to tell y'all a tale of our little city here, Las Vegas, a place where any old
00:06gunslingin' buckaroo can do any old thing.
00:09Well, anything, except drunk, bachelor party-style public sex with an animatronic cow outside a barbecue restaurant, which he did.
00:20Can we have one case that doesn't spiral out of control?
00:25You don't get it, Lincoln. You're a Vegas lawyer.
00:30But you think you're better than Vegas.
00:32I am better than Vegas. I mean, look at that guy.
00:35Hey!
00:37Jesus Christ!
00:39Hell no!
00:41I'll allow it!
00:45Uh-oh!
00:46Oop-a-reeno!
00:48That's Gatahoyce!
00:49Guys, please. Sorry for them, ma'am.
00:52Anyway, what crazy thing were you saying?
00:54We're gonna be the firm that takes down
00:57Magicians vs. Animals!
01:00Oh, yeah!
01:01Guess who has two thumbs, 11 toes, and can legally practice login?
01:07I thought you got disbarred and sold your extra toe to that witch.
01:11Milk and port! Milk and port!
01:14Partners?
01:15Partners.
01:16Ah!
01:17The old exploding handshake. I've been waiting all night to do that.
01:22Very amusing.
01:23Now, let's get down to...
01:28Believing in yourself is for mass shooters and Judd Apatow's kids.
01:33What if we have him describe the first time Hitler...
01:36Not that, but also nothing like that.
01:38Who are you?
01:40I'm nose rings, buddy.
01:42I'm R-rated movies and saying the word sucks.
01:45Lem, did you file that what the hell?
01:47I'm gonna need you to immediately start kissing my legs so that they know you're not challenging my dominance.
01:52I may be concussion, but I know that much.
01:55And I know one other thing.
02:00Headsets on, everyone.
02:02Why is everything we do only so high-concept and wacky?
02:06Why wouldn't it be?
02:09I'm Lincoln-f***ing Goff, and I will fight for you!
02:15Holy f***. This is so stupid.
02:18Right? I knew you'd like it.
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