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00:00MUSIC
00:16APPLAUSE
00:22Good evening and welcome to a very special edition
00:25of previously unseen clips from series 18 of Would I Lie To You?
00:30Joining David Mitchell tonight...
00:32..Stacey Solomon...
00:33..Eddie Marsan...
00:34..Judy Love...
00:36..Sir Grayson Perry...
00:37..Rosie Ramsey...
00:39..Josh Jones...
00:40..Ritchie Anderson...
00:42..Koji Radical...
00:43..Harriet Kemsley...
00:44..and Chris Ramsey.
00:46And joining Lee Mack tonight...
00:49..Legend...
00:50..Jill Scott...
00:52..Chris Jumbo...
00:53..Harry Hill...
00:54..Shazia Mirza...
00:56..Ivo Graham...
00:57..Chris McCausland...
00:59..And...
01:00..Kadina Cox.
01:01CHEERING
01:02First up, it's...
01:04..Ritchie.
01:07To make sure I get to the Radio 2 breakfast show on time,
01:10I always eat my shreddies in the shower.
01:14Oh!
01:15Please do.
01:16I'm guessing by the time the shower's finished,
01:18it's then more water in there than milk.
01:20No, sir, I have a door in the shower and I'm in there,
01:23but I leave my arm out with the cereal.
01:25You have a shower whilst holding a bowl out of the shower.
01:29And also, the very act of washing your body, sort of...
01:32..I can't imagine doing that with one hand.
01:36LAUGHTER
01:37I use one of those lather things.
01:39You know, the...
01:40What are they called?
01:41Oh, oh, a loofah!
01:41What you need to get is, like, a loofah,
01:44where it's a loofah at one end and a spoon at the other.
01:46And you just...
01:47..and you just flip it, you know.
01:49Wash, wash, wash, flip.
01:51Have some cereal.
01:53In the morning, I'll get up at half three, I'm frazzled,
01:55and I'm just going to get ready...
01:56You need frazzles as well.
01:58LAUGHTER
01:58What time do you have to be in the studio?
02:00Half six.
02:01Where do you live?
02:02How far is the journey?
02:03Northamptonshire, so I live about an hour and a half away.
02:05And you do that every day?
02:06Every...
02:07Why don't you move?
02:09LAUGHTER
02:10You need to be getting up in about 25 minutes.
02:14LAUGHTER
02:14So you're having a shower.
02:15Yeah.
02:15You're going out, you're eating.
02:17You're going back in the shower, going out, you're eating.
02:19So there's water going all over the bathroom?
02:20Sometimes.
02:21Does that not bother you?
02:22Not really, cos we've got one of those...
02:24Is it laminate floors?
02:25I wouldn't know, I've never been.
02:27LAUGHTER
02:28What is it, like, that plastic floor thing?
02:30I don't know what it's called.
02:31Lino?
02:32Lino.
02:33You've got a lino floor in your bathroom.
02:36Hang on, Rob's side, why don't you move?
02:38LAUGHTER
02:40Is Radio 2 not paying very well?
02:42LAUGHTER
02:43Where is the shower?
02:45We've got an en-suite.
02:47So you think it's less disruptive for your other half,
02:49for you to be clank, clank, clank with a spoon...
02:52LAUGHTER
02:52While you're having a shower,
02:54rather than just silently lathering and rinsing.
02:57No, cos we use plastic cutlery, so there's no clank...
03:00LAUGHTER
03:02Plastic cutlery, lino, Northampton.
03:05It's just sounding so glamorous.
03:07What's on your bedroom floor?
03:09Carpet.
03:10Thick, thick shag.
03:12LAUGHTER
03:14LAUGHTER
03:14Can you tiptoe back through?
03:16When we got the carpet laid in the bedroom,
03:17I specifically told them about this.
03:20So they put that...
03:20You know the...
03:21Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
03:23LAUGHTER
03:23Richie?
03:24No, you didn't.
03:25I did?
03:25You're telling me you told the carpet manufacturer,
03:28the company that's stitched your carpet...
03:29Yeah.
03:30Just so you know,
03:31this has to be just right for my cereal challenge.
03:35So what are you going to say, Lee?
03:37Er, what did we think?
03:38Oh, come on, it's...
03:39Can't be true, isn't it?
03:40Lie.
03:41It's got to be a lie.
03:42OK, Richie, was it a lie or was it true?
03:45Well, unfortunately...
03:46It was...
03:48A lie!
03:49Yeah!
03:50APPLAUSE
03:50Well played!
03:51Well played!
03:53It's Kush.
03:55Ahem.
03:57I once couldn't go to the loo because someone famous
04:00was in the cubicle next to me.
04:03Right.
04:04David's team.
04:05Oh.
04:05So, who?
04:08Beyonce.
04:09Oh, come on.
04:11Now, Kush, where are we?
04:14OK, so I went to the Met Gala a few years ago
04:18when I was still living in New York
04:20and she was there.
04:21Do you know what the Met Gala is?
04:23I do.
04:23You do?
04:24Do you?
04:25It's a big sort of party slash charity event in New York
04:29where lots of famous people turn up in costumes
04:32and I assume then it sort of drinks and nibbles.
04:36LAUGHTER
04:37When you go there, there's like a massive party inside
04:41but there's also only really one or two toilets
04:43so lots of famous people end up queuing for the loo
04:48and it's taking them a lot of time to get out of the outfits
04:52to have a wee because everyone needs help
04:53because all the outfits are really high-tech.
04:55Who was in your queue?
04:57Well, Barbara Streisand was behind me.
05:00No.
05:00Wow.
05:01And Beyonce was in front of me.
05:02Did Beyonce have security with her?
05:04Everybody had like two or three people with them
05:06to help them in and out of their stuff.
05:08So she was in a very tight tube-like dress
05:11made out of plasticky stuff.
05:13I got in the cubicle and obviously she went in one before me
05:16and I went in the one next to her
05:18and I could hear...
05:19She's in there with...
05:22She's in there with two other people.
05:23Yes.
05:24I'm not sure if you've been in a girl's toilet recently, David,
05:26but anybody that needs an outfit that needs help,
05:29we go in together and we help each other with it.
05:31Beyonce is like Queen Bee.
05:34I just don't think she would...
05:36She would queue.
05:38I think she's got a toilet built outside separately.
05:42At that level, you can probably organise it
05:44that you have like one massive wee at the beginning of the year.
05:47Yeah.
05:48Then you're done.
05:49Because otherwise you're just too busy.
05:51God, I'd kill for that.
05:53So you're in the cubicle, you can hear...
05:58You can hear everyone in the other toilets
06:00trying to do the same thing.
06:01You know, oh here, I'm in this, oh let...
06:03Oh wait, I'll sew this.
06:05Further along could you hear memories?
06:08Like the corners, we've got nothing to be guilty of.
06:13I am a woman in love.
06:16No.
06:17No?
06:18No.
06:18Oh, what a stuck-up old cow.
06:20She didn't give him a song, didn't she?
06:23Anyway, so she started to wee.
06:26You heard it?
06:26You heard Beyonce's wee...
06:28Well that was why I couldn't go.
06:29I could hear her stream.
06:32Oh.
06:34And...
06:35I live in the stream.
06:38That is what we are.
06:41I just felt it was my most magical moments of my life.
06:44I thought maybe, if I listened, I could maybe take on some of the magic or something.
06:50Like, it would rub off on me in some way, just in the...
06:52Well if she missed the toilet, it definitely would, wouldn't it?
06:57So I just, I couldn't go, I couldn't go.
06:59Did you talk to her?
07:01Who did you talk to that night, Kush?
07:02It was hosted by Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston.
07:05Oh.
07:06And I think I was sacked between Sarah Jessica Parker and Grandmaster Flash.
07:11Oh, wow.
07:12And tonight, Lee Mack and Tim Hine.
07:16But, if it's worth anything, I have been to the toilet whilst I've been doing this.
07:21OK, it's time to take a guess.
07:23Is Kush telling the truth?
07:24I want it to be true.
07:26It's a hard one.
07:26Because I love the idea of the sort of crackly dress and, like, being unable to...
07:29Because I think I can imagine that.
07:31I want it to be true as well, so that we can go to the Met Gala together next year.
07:35She laughed like, yeah, right.
07:38I think my instinct is it's a lie.
07:41Oh, your God.
07:42OK.
07:43They think it's a lie.
07:44Kush, was it a lie?
07:45Were you telling us the truth?
07:48It was true.
07:50Oh!
07:57It's Stacey.
07:59My middle name is Gary.
08:05Please, Tim.
08:06How is it spelt?
08:08G-A-R-Y.
08:10Why is your middle name Gary?
08:12Because we had an old uncle, Gary.
08:15My dad really looked up to him, idolised him, and he passed away when he was quite young.
08:19Your dad's uncle?
08:20My dad's uncle, yeah.
08:21In Jewish tradition, your middle name is someone who you've loved who has passed.
08:25So I got Gary.
08:28And have you had problems with this over the years?
08:30Yeah, I don't write it down.
08:34It's off my passport and my birth certificate.
08:37What about at the wedding, when you married Joe, did they say,
08:40and do you Stacey Gary Solomon?
08:44No.
08:44No?
08:45No, I was like, no middle names and he didn't get his evil.
08:47What's his, what's Joe's middle?
08:49Adam.
08:49Oh, you should have said Brenda.
08:53What are you thinking, Harry?
08:55It's so far-fetched, it's got to be true, isn't it?
08:58What do you think?
08:59I think it's true.
09:00You both think it's true?
09:01Yeah.
09:01Do you think it's a lie?
09:02I'll go with you guys.
09:04I'll go on tonight.
09:04My wife says, did you lose again?
09:06I go, yep.
09:07Did you have a chance of winning?
09:08Yep.
09:10What did you get wrong?
09:11Oh, Stacey Solomon was on and she said her middle name was Gary.
09:16Are you assuming she said that was a lie?
09:17No, no, no.
09:18We went for true.
09:21Because you know Stacey Solomon, she looks like a Gary, doesn't she?
09:26I don't buy it, but I'll go true.
09:27You're saying true?
09:28OK, Stacey, were you telling me...
09:32Or was it a lie?
09:33Yes.
09:35What?
09:41What's the matter with you?
09:46Matt.
09:49I love being gladiator so much, I'm having building work done so I can play gladiators at home.
09:57David's team.
09:58Oh.
09:58What are you having built?
10:00What's the...?
10:00I'm getting a specific game constructed in my house.
10:04Which one?
10:05Hang tough.
10:06Hang tough.
10:07Talk us through.
10:09Oh, you know it.
10:09With the rings.
10:11So what do you have to do and hang tough?
10:13For people...
10:14Are you...
10:14Are you asking him?
10:16I mean, I'm literally...
10:18Are you literally on the show?
10:21There's loads of rings attached from the ceiling and then you've got to, like, get across like monkey barring and
10:27he's trying to get you.
10:28And what happens when he catches you?
10:29So we meet in the middle.
10:30We kiss.
10:37Is this an indoor or outdoor thing you're having done?
10:40Indoor.
10:41Wow.
10:42Where do you live?
10:43I live down on the south coast.
10:45What's the house prices like?
10:49Fairly high.
10:50And underneath, I'm hoping, you're going to say crash mats or...
10:54What have you got under there in case you fall off?
10:57A...
10:57Swimming pool.
10:59You fall into the pool?
11:01It's not going to be a...
11:01Oh, that sounds like a really nice day, actually.
11:04LAUGHTER
11:04You've got the pool, you've got the rings.
11:07Anything else out of the ordinary?
11:10Er, we are getting a slide installed in our house.
11:13Where will the slide be?
11:15Er, from a hidden door upstairs in the hallway.
11:18It isn't door.
11:20It's a cupboard.
11:21And then when you open it, it's actually...
11:24Yeah.
11:24Do you have stairs as well?
11:26It's the only way.
11:27Yeah, yeah.
11:27Oh, it's going to say, cos imagine if you had a bit of bad news
11:30and then you've got to get on the slide!
11:32LAUGHTER
11:33Where does the slide take you?
11:35It's emanating the cinema slash games room.
11:38Wow!
11:38Gladiators pays well, doesn't it?
11:40LAUGHTER
11:41What do you think?
11:42I think it's a big part of his job, this ring-ganging.
11:46So, to practise, he's got to make his own rings.
11:51But he hasn't yet, has he?
11:52And he's been fine without this facility so far.
11:55What's your win ratio, like...?
11:57100% success rate.
11:59Have you?
12:00Waiting for the celebrity version of me and Rob.
12:03LAUGHTER
12:03I mean, you're going to have to lift him up on the rings,
12:05but when he's on the floor...
12:07LAUGHTER
12:09It's interesting, you're confident that I won't be taking part.
12:11LAUGHTER
12:12Sorry, in that scenario, just to be clear, you haven't turned it down,
12:15you weren't asked.
12:17LAUGHTER
12:18How much money has he got?
12:20I think we can assume that he is comfortably asked.
12:23I think he's OK.
12:24He's probably got protein bars that he sells and...
12:28LAUGHTER
12:29Would it be possible for us to have a look at your account?
12:32LAUGHTER
12:33What's your mum and dad do?
12:35Er, they are both retired.
12:38Retired billionaire!
12:40LAUGHTER
12:43True, we'll go true.
12:45Matt, was it the truth or was it a lie?
12:47It was, in fact...
12:49True.
12:50Yay!
12:52CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
12:54Er, Eddie, you're next.
12:58I once kicked Harold Pinter in the privates.
13:03LAUGHTER
13:04Please, team.
13:05Wow.
13:06When?
13:0919...
13:101997.
13:11I should say, by the way, for a lot of my audience,
13:14the watch for me is the youngest of the crowd.
13:16LAUGHTER
13:17And they might not know, Harold Pinter was a very famous playwright,
13:22now deceased.
13:23Just there we are.
13:24So, er, why did you kick Harold Pinter in the privates?
13:27I almost said, why did you kick Harold Pinter in the pinter?
13:30LAUGHTER
13:31It was during a rehearsal of a play.
13:36What was the play?
13:37The Homecoming.
13:38At the National Theatre.
13:41Ooh.
13:42OK.
13:42We were doing, er, a fight scene and, um, the actor that I was supposed to be,
13:50um, kicking moved out the way...
13:53Who was that actor? Will we know that person?
13:55Er, Keith Allen.
13:57LAUGHTER
13:58Keith Allen from the comic strip?
14:00Yes.
14:00Keith Allen.
14:01Who else was in it?
14:02Er, Michael Sheen.
14:03Oh.
14:04Wales' second greatest actor.
14:07LAUGHTER
14:08Yes.
14:08After Anthony Hopkins.
14:11LAUGHTER
14:16Is it normal that he would be there?
14:18Keith Allen was terrible at improvising lines,
14:22so Harold was making sure that every comma and pause...
14:26Right.
14:26...was being adhered to.
14:28And at one point you're supposed to kick the character of Keith...
14:31Keith Allen.
14:32Keith Allen's playing.
14:33I moved out of the way and I kicked Harold Pinter.
14:35What was he doing, stood right behind Keith Allen?
14:38Er, checking that he was, um, doing the, um...
14:41By physically standing an inch behind it?
14:44LAUGHTER
14:44I've never written a play myself, but I don't think you always have
14:48to turn up to every rehearsal of every play you've ever written
14:51just to make sure the actors aren't going off script
14:53and stand near them to stop them doing so.
14:56LAUGHTER
14:56It's quite a major revival of the play at the National Theatre, isn't it?
15:00Writers do attend some rehearsals.
15:02No, I suppose so.
15:03Well, he's paid a terrible price.
15:05LAUGHTER
15:07Did you ever laugh about it or was it very awkward?
15:09No, Harold didn't laugh about it.
15:11Harold was very offended.
15:13What did he say?
15:13Offended.
15:16LAUGHTER
15:18People are so offended these days, aren't they?
15:21They take offence at anything.
15:23Can't kick anyone in the balls anymore.
15:25LAUGHTER
15:26So why was you kicking him in the play?
15:28Because he's my abusive brother.
15:31It's a marvellous moment.
15:33It's brilliant.
15:34I was fantastic.
15:35LAUGHTER
15:37It's one of the great groin-kicking moments in the play.
15:40It's one of the greats.
15:40It's up there in the moment when Hamlet kicks Claudius in the ball.
15:45Yes.
15:45LAUGHTER
15:46Yeah, but he got Shakespeare one time and that was very awkward.
15:49LAUGHTER
15:51What were you wearing?
15:52I had a suit specially made for me.
15:54It was all, like, set in the 60s, so I had a nice...
15:56Oh, it was a dress rehearsal?
15:58No, but we'd always wear costumes in rehearsals.
16:01Why?
16:02Because it affects your physicality.
16:04He wouldn't understand, Eddie.
16:06He wouldn't understand.
16:08I tell you what, in the pantos, they don't do it
16:10until the very first performance.
16:13LAUGHTER
16:13Ivo, what do you reckon?
16:15I think it is a lie.
16:16Kadina?
16:17I think it's a lie.
16:18You think it's a lie?
16:19I think it might be a lie.
16:20They think it's a lie?
16:21Eddie, was it a lie or were you telling the truth?
16:24It's a lie.
16:25Ah!
16:29It's trilogy.
16:32I have what I call happy trousers and sad trousers,
16:35and I choose which ones to wear depending on my mood.
16:39Oh!
16:40That's a lovely story.
16:41Are you wearing your happy or sad trousers this evening?
16:43These are a neutral pair.
16:46LAUGHTER
16:46It's great to be on the show, isn't it, Cody?
16:49I'm outside of the house.
16:50Oh.
16:51Only in the house?
16:52Only in the house.
16:53What's the difference between the happy and the sad?
16:55Is it colourful, brightness?
16:58Juxtaposition, you know?
16:59Oh.
17:00On my happy days, I like to wear dark colours,
17:02and on my sad days, I like to wear bright colours.
17:04Gosh.
17:05I thought maybe your sad ones would be really absorbent,
17:08so you could cry into them.
17:10LAUGHTER
17:11It takes a lot of confidence to go to the shop
17:13and ask for absorbent trousers.
17:17Trust me.
17:18Yes.
17:19Can you describe them in detail, both pairs, please?
17:22Erm, yes.
17:23Well, do it, though.
17:26LAUGHTER
17:28Erm, one's like linen.
17:30It's oxblood.
17:31Yeah.
17:31And the other one...
17:32Just plain?
17:33Very plain.
17:34So they're the happy trousers because they're a darker colour?
17:37Yeah.
17:37Sad trousers, please.
17:39Yellow.
17:39Mustardy.
17:40Oh, so really bright.
17:41Oh.
17:41In a situation where you wake up sad,
17:44you think, right, the sad trousers straight away,
17:46put the yellow ones on.
17:47Mm-hm.
17:47And then perhaps you watch an upbeat, erm, item on This Morning,
17:53would you change your trousers?
17:55No.
17:56I start as I mean to go on.
17:58Well...
17:59Do you ever wake up happy?
18:00How do you...
18:01I'm happy that I've woken up!
18:03LAUGHTER
18:05How do you know you're happy when you wake up?
18:06The sheets are dry.
18:09LAUGHTER
18:12COJI, how long after you wake can you ascertain your mood?
18:18OK, so...
18:19I've woken up.
18:20Ah!
18:20Boom.
18:21That Sleeping Beauty vibes, yeah?
18:23Yeah, yeah.
18:23Yeah.
18:24The sheets have fell gracefully to my waist.
18:27Nice.
18:28Very poetic, isn't it?
18:28The nudie bits.
18:30Yeah.
18:30I look towards the window.
18:32Yeah.
18:32And normally, if it's a happy day,
18:34there are birds waiting to take the covers off me
18:37and bring me my feathers.
18:40LAUGHTER
18:42Let's go for a stab at this.
18:46Jill.
18:47Jill, what do you think?
18:47I think you might have got the pants the one way round.
18:50Happy should be happy.
18:51But I get the idea that if you're sad,
18:54you put on your happy trousers.
18:55Like, I was so sad this morning knowing I had this with you.
18:58So...
18:59LAUGHTER
19:01And yet I was happy to be with you and put on my black t-shirt.
19:05LAUGHTER
19:06Then I'm going to go...
19:08Oh, it's so hard.
19:10It is.
19:11And Harry, what about you?
19:13Yeah, I'm saying lie.
19:14Lie as well.
19:14OK, Lee.
19:15It's a lie.
19:16Koji, truth or lie?
19:19It was a lie.
19:20It was a lie.
19:21It was a lie.
19:22It was a lie.
19:22It was all a lie.
19:24APPLAUSE
19:26Rosie, you're next.
19:28I hated the shirt of my husband so much I secretly gave it to a charity shop
19:32then had to come clean when he saw it on a mannequin in the window.
19:37LAUGHTER
19:37Lee's team.
19:38OK, where do you live?
19:40South Shields.
19:41So you're in South Shields and you're walking past and Chris, your husband...
19:45Chris Ramsey...
19:46Yes.
19:46He sees the offending article, shall we call it?
19:49Yeah.
19:49Describe the shirt.
19:50So it was just very patterned and I really...
19:54Don't listen to her, Josh.
19:56Sorry.
19:56Sorry.
19:57Nervous moments.
19:58We're all thinking, you know.
20:01We put our little choices out there.
20:03All vulnerable and hopeful.
20:07Oh, bless him.
20:07I love the fact that David thinks he's being as bold as Josh.
20:11LAUGHTER
20:12So describe this shirt for us.
20:15So, firstly, I really don't like the colour burgundy.
20:17Why don't you like it?
20:18What is it about it?
20:18It just doesn't suit his skin tone.
20:20Oh, so you just don't like it on him?
20:21Don't like it on him.
20:22How would you describe his skin tone?
20:24Like, pasty.
20:27Pasty?
20:27He suits, like, greens.
20:29Would he suit what Josh is wearing?
20:31No.
20:32LAUGHTER
20:33Did he see it first?
20:35In the charity show?
20:36In the Oxfam, yeah.
20:36Yeah, he saw it.
20:37What did he say?
20:38Is that my shirt?
20:40And...and you said?
20:41It might be.
20:43LAUGHTER
20:43It's true, isn't it? Come on, it's true.
20:45Do you think it's true?
20:45Yeah.
20:45I'm very confident.
20:46Why are you so confident?
20:48Why are you so confident?
20:48Because I don't think she's got it in her to be that smooth with a lie.
20:51Why don't you think she's got it in her to lie that well?
20:53I just don't think...well, I mean, it's...who knows.
20:56See how nice-looking?
20:58LAUGHTER
20:58I just think it was so quick and it was so...
21:01LAUGHTER
21:03LAUGHTER
21:04That's all you know.
21:05Yeah, that's all you know.
21:06Yeah, that's all you know.
21:06Yeah, yeah, because of that.
21:07It's so quick and natural.
21:09I mean, you could have at least looked her for another second.
21:12LAUGHTER
21:13What do you think, Shazia?
21:15It's true.
21:16You think it's true?
21:17Not said with much conviction.
21:18It's a mundane thing that could happen to anyone.
21:21LAUGHTER
21:22It could go evil!
21:24It could go evil!
21:25That's one of the compliments these two, aren't they?
21:29Right, they both think it's true.
21:31Right, Matt, you're so confident, you tell them.
21:32True, yeah, it's true.
21:32Go on, be a legend.
21:34You think it's true?
21:35Yeah.
21:36All right, so, Rosie, looking lovely tonight.
21:39I was.
21:42Truth or lie?
21:43It was, in fact, a lie.
21:47APPLAUSE
21:52Padina, you're up next.
21:55When I was on I'm a Celebrity,
21:57I managed to smuggle two banned items into the jungle.
22:01Ooh.
22:02Davidson.
22:03OK.
22:04All right, what were the items?
22:05Some sweets and some lip gloss.
22:07What kind of sweets are we talking?
22:09Chew it's and Werther's Originals.
22:11That's great.
22:12That's the complete opposite end of the age spectrum, isn't it?
22:15You start with Chew it's and you end your life with Werther's Originals.
22:18LAUGHTER
22:19What makes you think of taking a lip gloss?
22:21Cos my lips were getting a bit dry, so...
22:23Right.
22:24No, but lip gloss dries them out.
22:26Do you think?
22:28LAUGHTER
22:29I seem like I've parachuted into loose women.
22:33LAUGHTER
22:34Won't be the first time you've done that.
22:36LAUGHTER
22:36I mean, it's a hell of a trick, I'll give you that.
22:39LAUGHTER
22:40Who else was in there with you?
22:42Erm, so we had...
22:44Richard Maidley.
22:46Yeah.
22:46Naughty Boy.
22:48Who was he?
22:49Richard Maidley was a naughty boy.
22:50LAUGHTER
22:51You had an East Ender, didn't you, when you were in it?
22:54Oh, we had, er...
22:55Ian Beale.
22:57What's his real name?
22:59Adam Woodyer.
23:00Adam, yeah.
23:01Yeah.
23:01So, you smuggled the stuff in.
23:04Yeah.
23:05Did anybody notice?
23:06Anybody find out?
23:07Not noticed, but, like, I told, erm...
23:10And her name's just gone from my head.
23:13LAUGHTER
23:13Did you find it?
23:14LAUGHTER
23:17Just...
23:17You describe her, and we'll try and figure out who it was.
23:20She's a judge on Strictly.
23:22She used to be.
23:23Arlene Phillips.
23:24Arlene Phillips.
23:25Lovely Arlene.
23:26Erm, but Arlene was struggling a little bit, so I'd just smuggle her,
23:29cos you said they're all people sweet,
23:31I'd smuggle her a little where there's originals.
23:34LAUGHTER
23:35Arlene, if you're watching...
23:39Well, look, David, let's say about five to ten years from now,
23:43you are going on to, I'm a celebrity, get me out of here.
23:47OK.
23:47What are you smuggling in to help you through?
23:50I admire your optimism, Rob, but I don't think there is any way
23:54that in five or ten years' time I would be insurable for that show.
23:58LAUGHTER
23:59I should take it part in the foot of the game.
24:02LAUGHTER
24:03Lee, for you, what would you need?
24:06Er...
24:07Just...any...anything.
24:08I mean, just...
24:09Yeah, you're really helping.
24:10LAUGHTER
24:11I'm so sorry about the insurance remark, because this is gold.
24:16LAUGHTER
24:17This guy's trying to play along, David.
24:20What are we thinking?
24:22Eddie?
24:23I think it's true.
24:24I've never watched I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out.
24:27Because you're the most cultured person we've ever had on here.
24:31No, it's because they never have me on.
24:33If I'm not on it, I'm not watching it.
24:35LAUGHTER
24:37Is this the first time you'll have seen this show when you're watching it?
24:40LAUGHTER
24:41OK, I'm going to go true.
24:43You're saying it's true?
24:44Yeah. OK.
24:45Kadina, they think it's true.
24:46Was it true or was it a lie?
24:48It was indeed true.
24:51APPLAUSE
24:55It's David.
24:58Last year, I won this hat on a plane
25:02for being the only person to find all the words
25:06in the in-flight magazine word search.
25:09LAUGHTER
25:10Just take the hat and pop it on the desk for us.
25:14There we go.
25:15LAUGHTER
25:16Wow.
25:16What was the flight?
25:18Easy jet.
25:20Were the rules anyone who finished it gets a hat
25:23or the first to finish it gets a hat?
25:25Of all the finishers, the person they randomly select gets a hat.
25:29Are you sure you weren't the only person to complete it,
25:32like it says on the card?
25:36LAUGHTER
25:37Yeah, I was probably the only person.
25:40LAUGHTER
25:41Thinking back, they had to give it to me
25:43cos I was just the only person.
25:46LAUGHTER
25:46Do you remember any of the words that you identified?
25:50February.
25:51LAUGHTER
25:53What was the theme?
25:55Sorry, the theme of the word search?
25:57They were often themed, aren't they?
25:58Are they?
25:59Yes.
26:00Almost always.
26:02Ah.
26:02Clearly the theme was the early months of the year,
26:05but that seems kind of narrow to me.
26:08Can you put it on for us, David?
26:10Let's have a little look.
26:11Let's go.
26:13Oh, now it's believable!
26:15It's an incredible-looking hat to give as a prize.
26:18You'd think a baseball cap, wouldn't you?
26:21But, no?
26:21They went for that strange hat that might have been borrowed from a lower low.
26:28LAUGHTER
26:28I think they wanted a sort of undertone of totalitarianism.
26:34LAUGHTER
26:34Just to remind everyone that we live in a troubled world.
26:38LAUGHTER
26:39Michelle, if you were getting onto a plane and you looked in the cockpit
26:43and you saw that in the cockpit, how would you feel?
26:47They didn't let me sit in the cockpit.
26:49No, but sometimes the captain pops out, doesn't it?
26:51No, I'd say a man looking like that in the cockpit
26:53is not as worrying as a man looking like that sat at the back.
26:59LAUGHTER
26:59No, it's a fair point.
27:00Who are you travelling with, David?
27:02With my wife and daughter.
27:06How did your daughter feel when Daddy won this accolade?
27:09She was very, very proud.
27:11LAUGHTER
27:13Very proud.
27:14Did she help you?
27:15No, no, no, that would have been quite uneniable.
27:17Oh, that's a horrible image, isn't it?
27:18Yeah.
27:18Daddy, I think I'm doing it.
27:20LAUGHTER
27:21She didn't want to...
27:23She didn't want to do the word search.
27:24No, she said it's just like crosswords for stupid people.
27:27LAUGHTER
27:28Tell me this, David.
27:29Did they give it you mid-flight or when you land?
27:31I think it was towards the end of the flight.
27:34Did they make an announcement?
27:35Yes, they made an announcement
27:36and I said, could they please mention my degree?
27:41LAUGHTER
27:41Your degree of contempt for all the other passengers?
27:44LAUGHTER
27:45All right, what are we thinking, Bob?
27:47I can't buy into the idea of David on EasyJet.
27:51Oh, I've been on EasyJet.
27:53That's true.
27:54I mean, that's true.
27:55LAUGHTER
27:57I was feeling like it was all a bit of codswallop.
28:01You're too clever at that, so there might be a lot of double bluffing, so...
28:04It does fit.
28:06They measured everyone as we got on.
28:08LAUGHTER
28:09Right, it's time to go for a guess.
28:11I say lie.
28:12Did you say lie?
28:13Go with Bob.
28:15Oh, I would say it's a lie.
28:16You're going to say it's a lie.
28:17David, was it true or were you telling us a lie?
28:19It was a lie.
28:22APPLAUSE
28:25Well, that's all we have time for on this special edition of Would I Lie To You.
28:29Thanks very much for watching. Good night.
28:32APPLAUSE
28:36Box Etch, a weekend with new comedy on iPlayer, like Scott Squad spin-off The Chief starring Jack Dougherty.
28:41Saturday night's all right for Music Night.
28:43This evening it's Bob Dylan starring with No Direction Home in half an hour on BBC Two.
28:47And stay with me on BBC One as Faith gets cold feet in Casualty.
28:52Next.
28:53Thanks.
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