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00:00With experiences you love, including Essence Beauty Carnival and Essence Wellness House.
00:05We've got something for everyone.
00:07Meet and greets, shopping, panels, workshops, performances, and more.
00:12It's the Black...
02:00Thank you, Ms. Tracy Steele, getting us ready, getting us in the groove, taking us in charge a little bit.
02:04I appreciate you, Ms. Tracy, all right?
02:05We are ready for day three.
02:08I feel like only five seconds has passed and also five months.
02:11Nice and spent.
02:12This is a vortex, healthy element, and we're here for it.
02:14And we have another incredible lineup for you today at the Beauty Carnival right here at the main stage.
02:20So let's jump right into it.
02:21Let's get it going.
02:23I'm going to welcome to the stage, Sarita.
02:25Sarita's side will get us going with our very first panel.
02:29Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you so much.
02:36I'm so happy to be here today.
02:37I really appreciate the opportunity to have this conversation about letting yourself answer, not them.
02:44I am now going to introduce myself, as everyone knows, as I'm in the street of side.
02:50And the reason why we're having this conversation is because it's a conversation that's really dear to my heart.
02:55Because I myself am incarcerated at the age of 19.
03:00I was sentenced to 16 years in prison.
03:03And let's always release the foundation of my organization, Operation Reservation,
03:07which was founded in order to support women and girls returning to society and get the incarceration.
03:13So without further ado, I am definitely going to bring out my guests.
03:17My first guest is a confidence, a strategic mindset, coach, and the power and action body in every woman around the world.
03:23Please welcome to the stage, Estella, for more.
03:32And next, I'm into the stage with Wendy Cooper.
03:36Wendy Cooper is a transgender woman.
03:39Thanks every single day of her life to make sure that transgender women are not criminalized in the legal system.
03:47So thank you for being here with the city for your health.
03:51I appreciate your time.
03:53Let's get right to all of you guys.
04:01Wendy, did you please start by introducing yourself and a little bit about your story?
04:08About how you ended up entangled in a group of the legal system?
04:12And a little bit about your attention to the entry to the government?
04:16And so my name is Wendy Cooper.
04:18I am a woman of science experience.
04:20I am a native of New Orleans.
04:22So how I got a part of the criminal legal system is that in 1999, I was charged and convicted of crime against nature.
04:34And so crime against nature is a law that was written in 1805.
04:38It was a law that used to punish individuals for engaging in sexual activity that is not appropriate.
04:43And so if you were to engage in sexual activity by solicitation in charge of crime against nature, you would have to find there is a prison.
05:01And also it was required to represent a sex offender.
05:12And as far as myself, I had to represent a sex offender for over 10 years because of crime against sexual assault.
05:18And so for me, I feel like it was unimportant for me to speak to the community for this movement.
05:28It's because of the disparities that I had to face in regards to being affected by the police in the crime against sexual assault.
05:37Thank you so much, Wendy.
05:39That's kind of a deal that it's not my thing.
05:42Can you share more about your background and how you decided as a strategic coach?
05:48Well, I would definitely go ahead and be very, very transparent.
05:53It's hard to put the transparency of my current because being a molested person, I call myself now a victim.
06:01And at the time, going through the scene of women that were broken and hurting, I understood that the statistics started with the traumatic experiences that we experienced.
06:10So I wanted to be that vehicle that was able to show others that you can excel no matter what you've been through.
06:16So what led me to my incarceration to start that was a choice and a decision to say, that wasn't me.
06:24And I'm not going to hold on tight to that.
06:27So to be able to speak into others to let them know that you may have been, but you don't continue to be.
06:33Thank you so much for that.
06:35I think that a lot of times we don't speak about or talk about the experiences that we put into prison.
06:41Thanks to their incarceration and the thing that all of us had to come and the thing that I think that people don't really discusses that when we use women to prison, it's trauma and experiences of trauma.
06:53So irrespective of your background, what's your socioeconomic background, you're associated with, you still may find yourself in prison if you are not dealing with the trauma that you had faced as a young person, people are not being like.
07:06Fasanna, could you please also give me some tips that you give to other women who are formerly incarcerated about being able to build a strategic mindset and build up your confidence?
07:21What are some things that you work on with folks when you're having these conversations?
07:25That's a great question.
07:26The first thing I work on, I have a 4C formula, and the first thing I work on is confidence.
07:32Because you have to be confident in you.
07:34Because when you've been through so many traumatic experiences in your life, I talk all the time, I probably was incarcerated behind physical walls.
07:43But you have people walking around every day that are into prisons.
07:46So, to let go of self-sabotaging thoughts and the fear, I help them to create a strategic plan on feeling from the inside out.
07:55How to speak affirmations over their self.
07:58How to definitely take time out for them to self-love on their self.
08:01And definitely how to stand in their faith of being consistent.
08:05As soon as you get, if when the people are working with other women who have treated experience with and affected by their communities in nature by some situation law.
08:16And I know that you can be pretty good for them.
08:19And who are not wanting to start over.
08:21And that you have been criminalized basically because of their experience.
08:27So, can you give me a little bit about what you need to talk with women and treat women?
08:32So for me, you know, when I have conversations with a lot of women and trans experience, I always go back to cisgender women, right?
08:43Cisgender women is women who need to be right to be who I am, right?
08:51When I think about a girl coming up, and I remember a good friend of mine is, you know, I always wanted to, you know, walk in my little pieces.
09:02And I don't know if you get that, she said we in a chair, and she began to put in my hair, and she began to, you know, want me to be, you know, be a girl, right?
09:13And so she wanted me to be that girl, and so when I talk to a lot of trans, you know, I don't always think about the disparations that I get from cisgender women, right?
09:26You know, I always tell them that, you know, regardless of if you go through, you know, allow your peers to be right to be over, right?
09:37And so you have to be able to, you know, to be able to, you have to be able to, you have to be able to, you have to be able to accept what was done, right?
09:45And so that's why I tell you that I, I, I, I don't teach you how to accept what is done, and to be far from it.
09:55So, um, the last piece of this conversation that I really wanted to focus in is, you know, for me, beyond bars between anti-incarceration.
10:04So I really want to spend the next couple of minutes going to discuss it from this individual here.
10:10So, how did you find, um, your faith in anti-incarceration?
10:15I know for myself, when I was when I studied, I realized that I had been placed in a system that, um, was compromised,
10:22and had compromised me, and allowed me to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to be a member.
10:30And until I learned that what had happened to me, um, was not right, not correct,
10:36I didn't understand, um, the feelings of, like, hopelessness, the feelings of feeling like I knew it's overachieving,
10:43to prove myself, um, not feeling worthy.
10:46So, you know, it's a lot of self-work, and it's a lot of hard work that I know that we all didn't have to be,
10:52to build equipment, back up, you know, or have a princess.
10:55We can't get power to anybody.
10:57We have to help them to find a power that already exists, and that it doesn't repower them.
11:03So there's no such thing as empowerment. It's all repowerment.
11:06And, um, I just want to take a minute to acknowledge each of you and repowerment of yourselves.
11:13But also, how, how did you get to the point of repowerment?
11:17What were they trying to be like?
11:19Like, for me, the, um, you know, reason why, um, um,
11:27Um, I think, you know, like I was going to call it, you know, experience, you know, face-up,
11:32you know, experience in the sexism.
11:34And you can be in the sexism, and you can be very good leaders.
11:37And I don't think a lot of these.
11:39And one of the requirements is, um, you can share these things.
11:43Um, you are not allowed to manage certain spaces.
11:47Um, you are not allowed to, um, participate in, um,
11:51Um, shout out for me and how to do this, right?
11:54And so I remember, um, you know, if I was kind of, you know, like,
12:00to, like, what I wanted to do, right?
12:02And, and, um, I'm just able to handle it, right?
12:06Because I didn't have the resources.
12:08I didn't have the, the one, you know,
12:11what I am going to say is that I need to do an excellent issue, right?
12:16And so, what you do for me, and not only me,
12:19but the human of my experience, you know, you know,
12:22and it's, um, salaries that should be planned, right?
12:27To be able to, um, go out with me and women in my community,
12:31to be able to, um, start a campaign, you know,
12:36which the kids' case may have been to bring awareness,
12:39to, you know, for this 16-year injustice, right?
12:42And because of, because of you, right, you know,
12:45you allow, um, my community to see me.
12:50And, and, and, and, and, because of you, right?
12:54You allow, you know, um, my community to, to gain awareness, right?
13:00And, and, and, and, and because of that, you know,
13:02you know, you know, feel our grace, right?
13:04And so, you know, right now, I feel so great about myself
13:07because at the beginning of the day, you know, like,
13:09I'm featuring this pride for that memory, you know what I'm saying?
13:13And it's been a new organization.
13:15Publication restoration is your way, you know,
13:17that's what it is.
13:18Also the film that she's referencing, well, is a,
13:20it's, it's been a documentary, um,
13:22it is one multiple awards.
13:25It's been invited to multiple festivals.
13:28Right now it is, about to be premiered at the High Festival in Los Angeles,
13:32and it's really brings around experiences of trans women who have been criminalized
13:39because of the way that they are born.
13:42So I encourage everyone to check it out.
13:46I think perhaps you'll be able to see and treat it.
13:50But it's definitely a powerful representation around people who have been criminalized
13:58just because of the way that they were born.
14:01So I think that it's a very important thing that we all need to talk about
14:08staying in solidarity with you.
14:10I tell you all the time that I don't see you as another dream woman.
14:15I see you as another bad woman.
14:17And you must see me like what I am.
14:18And I'm like, okay.
14:20But, you know, I see you as my sister's hope as well.
14:23So I just appreciate you and thank you.
14:28I just want to say for you, I know that you have a amazing story, you know, about how when you were raised
14:35that all of the things that you went through the mother was incarcerated and reconnected with your children
14:42and how did you feel like how did you feel like how did you feel like how did you feel like how did you feel like how did you reconnect with those and give you back to where you and begin to make you a woman?
15:01I know.
15:02You know, you're right there.
15:03You definitely have to take it layer by layer.
15:04And I am a mother of six.
15:06And I tell people all the time, my parents did not stop behind these forms, but I had to find ways to navigate through.
15:13Because what we realized as mothers is our kids are doing that time with us.
15:18So when I came home to reunite with them, I was married prior to going to prison.
15:23So two of my kids had already graduated.
15:26I had two that came through that I bestowed to them with moments in their lives.
15:31And a lot of things had transpired.
15:34So, as you said, the depression, the brokenness, I had mentally checked out.
15:40So when I came home and gathered my kids together, that's what began to give me strength.
15:46And I know it may sound cliche.
15:48A lot of people say, look through the word of God and through Christ.
15:50But can't nobody heal you and take you from nothing when you've got all these barriers.
15:55They're stopping you from being successful.
15:57They're stopping you from being that mother.
15:59And a mother is a matriarch of a home school.
16:02So how I began to get myself together was I acknowledged what had happened.
16:06I accepted it.
16:08But I began to say that I'm not a convicted man.
16:11I'm a returning citizen.
16:12So I never allowed people to call me that.
16:15And I began to just pick up the pieces from my kids.
16:18And I met one son and he was like, Mama, I'm going to stop college.
16:22And I was very devastated because I felt like I had already felt it.
16:26So he began this journey and he became very successful off this video.
16:31And he got over like 3 million people.
16:34So I was like, God, is that the truth to come from him?
16:37And to be honest, that's what gave me our redemption.
16:40I began to see the restoration coming through him.
16:44And so that's what started the second piece of my work.
16:47And I wanted to be that feeler.
16:49And they made her for other women that had experienced those traumatic experiences and those
16:53wrecks and barriers.
16:56Yeah, I think it's something really helpful that we're able to see from your restoration
17:01and your retention.
17:02The rest of your kids, you know, will receive it.
17:06I think a lot of times we're having worse grades.
17:09And we begin to beat ourselves a bit more in a system or a society.
17:15We get stuck in this.
17:16We get stuck in this mindset of, I'm not worthy.
17:21I don't deserve this.
17:22Because you know that you have made mistakes.
17:25So I know that each of you probably even got to answer this question already.
17:31But that's what I wanted to ask you.
17:34You know, it's so important to have a support system around yourself with you.
17:39Or trying to build up new confidence when you're trying to feel beautiful again.
17:44So who is that one person for you that you can see really different?
17:51Help you build your confidence.
17:53Help you not understand if you're alive.
17:55And you can show up as Dr. Salantino or Washington.
18:00That is so profound that you ask that.
18:02Because you're always so strong.
18:05What do you have to be?
18:07Who's there to help you up?
18:09And to hear something coursing in, to be honest, it was my son Mark Hill Washington.
18:14Because I remember looking in his eyes this one thing he told me.
18:18You see my mind never comes to that person.
18:21And for the whole four years he did.
18:23And all the other five they came.
18:25When I used to speak to him over the phone he said I love you.
18:28But just remember what you told me.
18:30All things is working together for your good.
18:32But then I was torn in that moment.
18:34But was he hurt?
18:36Was he broken?
18:37And when I came home you know he was sleeping in a cop.
18:40And going through that transition when he said we're not going to give up.
18:43We're going to do his thing.
18:45And he began to say how he was going to be a millionaire.
18:48And things like that.
18:49And that gave me the power.
18:51Because at that moment we didn't have him descending over our whole journey.
18:54But just to see him working his vision.
18:57Working what I had spoken into his life as a child.
19:01He began to give me that confidence.
19:03He began to give me that commitment back to myself.
19:06So I began to be consistent in my work and in my journey.
19:10And looked up two years later.
19:12And I'm like a million people.
19:14I want nobody but God.
19:16So that was definitely my son.
19:18So with that would be the same question.
19:21Is there one person for you that you felt like as you were coming into your own work as you did?
19:31You know?
19:32I didn't know.
19:33And with the person you think.
19:37Because I know you have to talk to me about.
19:39How do you have to be in a table and start inside of the criminal legal system.
19:45And the inspiration to being a judge.
19:47And you began to tell me how this conviction for you just took all of your dreams and your hopes and your vision away from you.
19:55So is that person for you?
19:57That you felt like I was able to support you and build you in your life.
20:02I think it was a great question.
20:05Did you see her?
20:08And I have an experience as a citizen.
20:12You know?
20:13My enthusiasm now.
20:15She's unable to care for her needs.
20:19I don't know how much of a business for her family as well.
20:23And also I have.
20:24And I think it's very hard, you know.
20:30you know, it's very challenging and stuff like that, um, you know, not sharing that big support, um, in, in, in, because of them, right?
20:42I had to come back with my life over, right? And how I got there, and how I was talking about the sort of position of it, right?
20:51And so, so, for me, um, I think this is how my importance is there, right? I like to only focus on here.
21:06Um, uh, I know this one, he, uh, he's been on a lot of movies right now, right?
21:13He played traveling, you know, he can hold this for me, and one of the things that I teach him, I teach him about movies, is, is, is, in this country, in this world, right?
21:27Um, even how you, right? You know, he's very, he's, he's a character, he's very challenging, right?
21:34And so, um, he doesn't make high degrees, guys, and he can hold the show, but that's why, because of the dedication of God, they committed to him.
21:46This year, he came out, he's a wonderful world, right?
21:49And so, for me, I think my, my celebration comes with him.
21:56When I see him, he said, I accept, right?
21:58And so, just yesterday, you know, um, that's what he told me then, you know, and he, you know, speaking of family, he just told me about helping home.
22:06I see a little good home, you know, so now, there's my change.
22:12So, I really appreciate the fact that you, um, acknowledge that your children are the change for you.
22:17I can say for myself, it's the same, you know, with family, it has always been important for me.
22:23I think that that is where I get my encouragement from, you know, my kids, my wife, my parents, my, you know, my family as a whole.
22:31They're very supportive of me to be.
22:33Um, sometimes we speak on different sides of conversations or how we feel about different things.
22:40I think that not only that I want to change for myself, I also want to change for the people that I love the most.
22:47I think the last thing that we can get ready to get off to the stage is, um, all of us get up everything.
22:52We do a lot of work, and we haven't really talked about the work that we do professionally, but I know that, um, we're getting up every day to pour in and support and help build confidence, um, in our community and in the population of currently informing first-rate women.
23:08We help you make inside often to let people know that things can be done and changes can happen.
23:14Um, but the last thing that I know for myself is, is, this is one of the main reasons why I might run it for you and send it and get anything out of it.
23:23So, um, you know, that you have someone that looks like them, that has been through their experiences, because we all have complex experiences, um, that is fighting for them and the things that you need.
23:41So, um, if you are, um, you are, um, you are in the area and you are in the fall.
23:48And if not, there are all multiple ways to support, um, so, um, you need to, just, um, .com and I know, our organization is Operation Restoration.
23:57Wendy, you can find her
24:00and try to send it with me.
24:02And I want to tell you something.
24:04So, and it's still
24:05over here, sure, about the social media.
24:08I hope she's still in the floor.
24:10I hope she's still in the door.
24:11So, again, ladies, thank you so much for
24:13sharing your stories with Dustin, his parents,
24:16others with the work that you do.
24:17I'm honored to have shared the speech with you all today.
24:20And I know you appreciate your time.
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