- 2 days ago
Rented a Billionaire Husband for Christmas
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00So I'm fighting the space shuttle for the second time, and this guy passes out.
00:00:08All right, it's about that time.
00:00:10So, are you kissing anybody at midnight?
00:00:12Uh, uh...
00:00:15Yeah, him.
00:00:21Hi!
00:00:22Just play along.
00:00:24Six, five, four, three, two, one!
00:00:30Hey!
00:00:53You have a cute scar.
00:00:55It's just my birthmark.
00:00:58Do you want me to stop?
00:00:59Tell me now.
00:01:00I don't want you to stop.
00:01:03I don't want you to stop.
00:01:03I don't want you to stop.
00:01:07I don't want you to stop.
00:01:09I don't want you to stop.
00:01:15I don't want you to stop.
00:01:21I don't want you to stop.
00:01:26I don't want you to stop.
00:01:32I don't want you to stop.
00:01:36I don't want you to stop.
00:01:38I don't want you to stop.
00:01:40I don't want you to stop.
00:01:42I don't want you to stop.
00:01:45I don't want you to stop.
00:01:49I don't want you to stop.
00:01:51Sam, I don't want you to stop.
00:01:55I don't want you to stop.
00:01:55I don't want you to stop.
00:01:56уверisin' extra money.
00:01:58I will find you.
00:02:03Maximus, can't you get married already?
00:02:08Bring home a wife or at least a girlfriend?
00:02:11I need grandkids. I need you to...
00:02:13Message received, Mom.
00:02:14I need to go now. I have to inspect the new headquarters.
00:02:26Seven years.
00:02:27Why can't I ever find you?
00:02:29And why do you still haunt me?
00:02:39Still thinking about that girl?
00:02:41Boss, it's been years.
00:02:45I'm ready to go to the inspection now.
00:02:48Your vest, sir.
00:02:50But first, we found her fake Christmas wife.
00:02:52She's waiting in the coffee shop.
00:02:53Blonde hair, red top.
00:02:55And, sir, make sure you use an alias.
00:02:58We can't have her know you're the Harrison Group CEO
00:03:00or she'll jack up the price.
00:03:01Good. Finally, I can get my mother off my back.
00:03:07Hi. One iced vanilla latte, please.
00:03:10And one hot chocolate.
00:03:12I can't wait to finally meet my new daddy.
00:03:16Now Auntie Debra and Pamela can't say I have no daddy anymore.
00:03:21Sweetie, remember, it's just pretend.
00:03:23It's just for Christmas.
00:03:25But, Mommy, why do we have to rent a daddy?
00:03:27Where's my real one?
00:03:28I'll tell you when you're older.
00:03:38Sweetie, why don't you go find us a table?
00:03:39Daddy!
00:03:49No!
00:03:49What?
00:03:56Daddy!
00:03:57No!
00:03:58I'm sorry.
00:04:00I'm not your dad.
00:04:01No, I know you're my daddy just as handsome as I've had.
00:04:05Oh.
00:04:05Mommy, hurry!
00:04:07Your fit Christmas husband has arrived!
00:04:16I asked the agency for an average-looking guy.
00:04:19He's gorgeous.
00:04:21Why does it feel so familiar?
00:04:28Why does she feel so familiar?
00:04:30She's waiting in the coffee shop.
00:04:31Blonde hair, red top.
00:04:33You must be my new Christmas husband.
00:04:36So, you're my new Christmas wife.
00:04:38See, I knew you were the new daddy we had, right?
00:04:41Hi, my name's Hyper.
00:04:42What's your name?
00:04:44Sam didn't say anything about a kid.
00:04:46Max, Aurelius.
00:04:48Eva.
00:04:49I think we should probably sit and discuss the details of this fake marriage.
00:04:53I just need a wife for the holidays.
00:04:56I guess mom gets her grandkid, too.
00:05:00So, per hour agreement, the rate is $1,000 per hour, and...
00:05:06$1,000 an hour?
00:05:07Well, yeah.
00:05:09It's $500 a day.
00:05:11Is that enough?
00:05:12That's the most that I can pay you.
00:05:14Wait, you're paying me $500 a day?
00:05:16That's what I agreed with the agency.
00:05:18You'll make your thousands over the week.
00:05:20Look, my requirements are simple, okay?
00:05:22Play my pretend husband, come with me to my hometown,
00:05:25and we all pretend to be one big happy family.
00:05:27And then my family will get off my back,
00:05:29so Piper can have a good Christmas for once.
00:05:34So she's getting pressure from her folks, too.
00:05:37Fine.
00:05:38But you have to help me get my mom off my case, too.
00:05:40Okay, deal.
00:05:47Ready to go get married?
00:06:02Wow.
00:06:03Clean up nice.
00:06:04This is my wedding day, after all.
00:06:06Pictures.
00:06:07Y'all guys are supposed to look like you're in love.
00:06:18I think we got it.
00:06:42Oh, I need some photos of us together, too.
00:06:46To prove to my parents that I'm actually married
00:06:49and have a happy family.
00:06:50Yeah.
00:06:51Of course.
00:06:51Of course.
00:07:01Happy holidays, Mom.
00:07:03From my family to you.
00:07:05Bad news, boss.
00:07:15The agency said that the girl that they recruited to be your fake wife
00:07:17bailed last minute.
00:07:19Wait, she bailed?
00:07:20Then who is...
00:07:24Who is she?
00:07:26Whatever.
00:07:27It doesn't matter.
00:07:29I've got what I need.
00:07:30Sam, don't worry about it.
00:07:34I already found someone.
00:07:40Okay, well, I think it's time for us to go.
00:07:44Christmas shopping waits for no one.
00:07:45Christmas shopping?
00:07:47I should come.
00:07:49Look, if you want me to be the husband
00:07:50in this fake-it-to-your-family plan,
00:07:52I think I should have some say in the gifts.
00:07:55It'll make it more believable.
00:07:56Fine.
00:08:00Yeah, fine.
00:08:01Okay.
00:08:02You can come.
00:08:10Let's go.
00:08:11Which mall are we going to?
00:08:13Um, I think that one.
00:08:14Oh, let's go to the bank.
00:08:19Oh!
00:08:21What the actual fuck?
00:08:26Sam, is Maximus pulling another one
00:08:30of his goddamn elaborate pranks again?
00:08:32Get me a DNA test for that little girl
00:08:34that he's with.
00:08:38She does kind of look like him.
00:08:43So when we give these gifts to my parents,
00:08:45we will say they're from you.
00:08:48Here, let me get this.
00:08:51I'm going to love you, Max.
00:08:52Oh, so, I was, uh, thinking
00:08:57that since we're married,
00:09:00we should probably kiss
00:09:02once or twice
00:09:03in front of them.
00:09:05Okay.
00:09:06Should we use our tongues, or...?
00:09:09No, no, definitely not.
00:09:10And absolutely no...
00:09:12Sex?
00:09:13Yes.
00:09:14This is strictly business.
00:09:16Anything physical outside of that
00:09:18does not have any.
00:09:20What?
00:09:20Afraid you'll fall for me?
00:09:24I just don't want Piper
00:09:25to have messy complications
00:09:27getting in the way
00:09:28of her having a good Christmas.
00:09:30Let's go.
00:09:37Here.
00:09:38What are you doing?
00:09:39I'd never let my woman
00:09:40pick up the tab.
00:09:43Well, I'm not your woman,
00:09:45and this isn't a real relationship,
00:09:47and I don't want your money.
00:09:48Attention, shoppers.
00:09:51All bakery items
00:09:52are now 50% off.
00:09:5350% off pies?
00:09:55Quick, go grab
00:09:55a dozen pumpkin pies.
00:09:5612 pumpkin pies.
00:09:57I hear this right?
00:09:58They're the best kind.
00:10:00Hurry up and go.
00:10:00Go.
00:10:01What are you standing here for?
00:10:04Hello there.
00:10:05Hi.
00:10:05You ready?
00:10:06Yes, yeah.
00:10:07Just these things.
00:10:07Okay, great.
00:10:09We have a holiday special today.
00:10:11Spend $500,
00:10:12get 10% off,
00:10:13and you are just short
00:10:14$15 if you want
00:10:15to take advantage
00:10:16of the deal.
00:10:16Oh, great.
00:10:18Yeah.
00:10:18What do you have
00:10:19that's just $15?
00:10:20Well, can you get
00:10:21a move on?
00:10:22I just got here.
00:10:24Relax.
00:10:25Yeah, yeah.
00:10:28Here, this will do the trick.
00:10:30Okay, thank you.
00:10:33Hurry up and pay.
00:10:37I will pay
00:10:38when I'm ready.
00:10:39You can wait
00:10:39your turn.
00:10:45Damn.
00:10:45My fake wife
00:10:46has some fire in her.
00:10:53Oh, wait, wait, wait.
00:10:54Not the pies.
00:10:54Not the pies.
00:10:55You can just
00:10:56set those on top.
00:11:01Hi, guys.
00:11:03Gonna hand you
00:11:04all these pies.
00:11:09Of course.
00:11:11Thank you so much.
00:11:12Of course.
00:11:12I hope you like pumpkin.
00:11:15She bought all 12 pies.
00:11:16Don't worry,
00:11:17I have enough
00:11:17for everybody.
00:11:18Just to give it away.
00:11:21Merry Christmas.
00:11:22Merry Christmas.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29You do that often?
00:11:31As often as I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:32I can.
00:11:34I can.
00:11:36We should go.
00:11:37We gotta pick up paper.
00:11:41Sit.
00:11:42Watch out.
00:12:01You done feeling me up?
00:12:04Shut up.
00:12:05Oh, sorry.
00:12:06I was just in character,
00:12:07wifey.
00:12:07Well, stay out of character
00:12:09until Christmas.
00:12:15And don't be late.
00:12:27Harrison Group?
00:12:29Do you do construction
00:12:30for them or something?
00:12:32Sort of.
00:12:32Not that I'm judging.
00:12:34I just need to get my story straight
00:12:36or my mom will eat both of us alive.
00:12:39Why don't we say that you do
00:12:40mid-level management
00:12:41for Harrison Group?
00:12:42I think that's respectable.
00:12:45Can we pick another company?
00:12:47No.
00:12:48Harrison Group is perfect.
00:12:50And they'll find it impressive.
00:12:51My cousin's husband works for them, too.
00:12:53So,
00:12:53it's perfect.
00:12:54Perfect.
00:12:54Perfect.
00:12:54Perfect.
00:12:54Perfect.
00:12:54Oh, and wear something nice
00:13:01for Christmas dinner.
00:13:02Don't worry.
00:13:03Okay, I clean up nicely.
00:13:04I wouldn't embarrass you.
00:13:07Too much.
00:13:08Let's go, Sam.
00:13:30It's time to check out
00:13:31the new HQ set.
00:13:33Hold on,
00:13:33you're covered in water
00:13:34and you have a hair
00:13:35on your shoulder
00:13:35and it's not yours.
00:13:37It's my daughter's.
00:13:40Daughter's.
00:13:41Give me a DNA test
00:13:43for that little girl
00:13:44that he's with.
00:13:59Hey, there they are!
00:14:01Hey!
00:14:02Nice to meet you!
00:14:03Oh, Dad.
00:14:05What did you need it?
00:14:06Oh, I missed you.
00:14:08So,
00:14:09where's this mysterious husband
00:14:11we heard all about?
00:14:12He's coming.
00:14:13Please don't tell me
00:14:14Maximus bailed.
00:14:15Good, good, good.
00:14:18So,
00:14:19heard you got a new hubby, sweetie.
00:14:21When's he arriving?
00:14:23Oh,
00:14:24it's probably just some story
00:14:25she cooked up
00:14:26to stop people talking.
00:14:28Poor thing.
00:14:28Not surprising.
00:14:30I mean,
00:14:30she's 30.
00:14:31Once a woman hits that age,
00:14:33you become undateable.
00:14:34Plus a kid looks so bad
00:14:37on dating apps.
00:14:40This is exactly why
00:14:42I refuse to come home single
00:14:43this Christmas.
00:14:44Auntie Pamela,
00:14:45Debbie,
00:14:46my dating life,
00:14:47quite frankly,
00:14:48is none of your concern.
00:14:49We're only worried about you.
00:14:51All these years
00:14:52without a husband.
00:14:54Zip it, Pamela.
00:14:55You know,
00:14:57you always spoiled her rotten.
00:14:59And look what happened.
00:15:00She got knocked up
00:15:01out of wedlock,
00:15:02raising a kid
00:15:03all alone.
00:15:04I'm not alone.
00:15:05Mm-hmm.
00:15:06And what does
00:15:07this mysterious husband do?
00:15:12He's a manager.
00:15:13Manager?
00:15:15Of what?
00:15:16Trash?
00:15:18Probably a cover
00:15:19for criminal activity.
00:15:21You don't have to lie
00:15:23to us, Eva.
00:15:25Actually,
00:15:26he's right here.
00:15:31Oh, wow.
00:15:33Wow.
00:15:34He is really good looking.
00:15:37Ah,
00:15:38must be AI.
00:15:39Mm-hmm.
00:15:40Congratulations, Eva,
00:15:41on your Photoshop skills.
00:15:43Fake.
00:15:43That's enough.
00:15:44She's our daughter
00:15:45and your niece.
00:15:47Show some respect.
00:15:48Remember last year
00:15:49when I introduced you
00:15:51to my husband's nephew,
00:15:53William,
00:15:53and you turned him down?
00:15:55Well, guess what?
00:15:57William works
00:15:57for the Harrison Group now.
00:15:59Makes 500 grand a year.
00:16:02That's half a million.
00:16:04Half a million.
00:16:06Girls are lining up
00:16:07for him all the way
00:16:08to New York.
00:16:10And speak of the devil.
00:16:12Willie,
00:16:15you've made it.
00:16:27There you are.
00:16:29Oh, look at you now.
00:16:31Living the dream.
00:16:33Oh, just think, Eva.
00:16:35Well, you could be driving around
00:16:36in a car like that
00:16:37had you not married
00:16:38that criminal waste manager.
00:16:41So married, huh?
00:16:42Is it serious?
00:16:45That's what marriage is.
00:16:46It's pretty serious.
00:16:48Wow.
00:16:49You must have rushed
00:16:50the time they're not, huh?
00:16:52Makes sense, though.
00:16:53You not being
00:16:54a hot young thing anymore.
00:16:56Dragging that kid around
00:16:57with no daddy.
00:16:59Yeah, a bullet dodged, Willie.
00:17:01Meanwhile,
00:17:02you're climbing
00:17:03the Harrison Group ladder.
00:17:05That's right.
00:17:07Just bought this brand new suit
00:17:09with my Christmas bonus.
00:17:10Women love a man in red.
00:17:13Sexy, like Santa Claus.
00:17:16Wanna sit on my lap?
00:17:18Don't touch me.
00:17:19Oh, so entitled.
00:17:21Williams, a successful man
00:17:23of taste, not waste.
00:17:25And yet, for some reason,
00:17:27he's willing to overlook
00:17:28your baggage.
00:17:29I mean, look at that car.
00:17:31Could your husband afford
00:17:33anything even close to that?
00:17:34Think of the life
00:17:35I can give you
00:17:36and Piper
00:17:36with all my Harrison Group money.
00:17:38Ditch your nobody husband
00:17:40and marry me instead.
00:17:43I wouldn't marry you
00:17:44if you were the last man on first.
00:17:50My mom would never marry.
00:17:52She already has a husband.
00:17:53He's gonna kick your butt.
00:17:55Is that so?
00:18:00Well, then,
00:18:01where is he?
00:18:03Because I don't see him.
00:18:04Does anyone see him?
00:18:08No.
00:18:09Just like I thought.
00:18:11Telling lies just like Mommy.
00:18:13That puts you on the naughty list.
00:18:16And let me show you
00:18:17what happens
00:18:18to naughty children.
00:18:19Mommy, are you okay?
00:18:25I see your hands.
00:18:26Oh, my God.
00:18:27I'm gonna take her in
00:18:28and get her packed up, okay?
00:18:29Come on, honey.
00:18:30Let's go.
00:18:32What the hell's the matter with you?
00:18:35How dare you put
00:18:36your filthy hands on my daughter?
00:18:39Let me go.
00:18:40Now, why would I go
00:18:41and do a thing like that
00:18:43when I'm having such a good time?
00:18:45Let me go.
00:18:49Touch my wife again
00:19:02and I will snap every finger
00:19:03that you've got.
00:19:08Max, you came.
00:19:10Don't worry, sweetie.
00:19:13Where's Piper?
00:19:15William Hitter.
00:19:16Mom, Dad,
00:19:17I'll take her inside.
00:19:18Well, it looks like
00:19:19we have a real Grinch
00:19:20to dispose of.
00:19:21Well, well, well.
00:19:23If it isn't the Waste Manager
00:19:24I've been hearing so much about.
00:19:26That's right.
00:19:28Now, I'm about to
00:19:29take out the trash.
00:19:32Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
00:19:35It's an honor to meet you.
00:19:36I'm Max.
00:19:37Eva told us all about you.
00:19:39From New York.
00:19:40Polite.
00:19:41Handsome.
00:19:42Just like she said.
00:19:44Wow.
00:19:45He was an AI.
00:19:46See?
00:19:48He's real.
00:19:49And he's more of a man here
00:19:50than William would ever dream to be.
00:19:52Son of a bitch.
00:19:53You just ruined my suit.
00:19:55And watch the way that you drive that
00:19:56pristine automobile.
00:19:59That car?
00:20:00Oh, my God.
00:20:02That's worth more than a house.
00:20:04That car?
00:20:05It was all over the news
00:20:06when the CEO of the Harrison Group bought it.
00:20:10Wait.
00:20:11Are you?
00:20:12Like I said,
00:20:17I'm just Eva's husband.
00:20:19And that's all he needs to know.
00:20:21I'm not here to put on a show for anyone.
00:20:24You really are a criminal, aren't you?
00:20:26You stole it.
00:20:27That car belongs to the CEO of my company.
00:20:29Jesus.
00:20:30How did he get away with it?
00:20:32That's what I want to know.
00:20:34Enough, please.
00:20:35I trust my daughter.
00:20:39She would never marry a criminal.
00:20:42Max, be honest with me.
00:20:44Where did that car come from?
00:20:47How much do you want for it?
00:20:49I'll pay you more money
00:20:50than you'd make in three lifetimes.
00:20:52So,
00:20:53you need a breath, man.
00:20:58All right, that's it.
00:20:58I'm calling the cops.
00:20:59Oh, way ahead of you.
00:21:01Wait.
00:21:02What?
00:21:03Are you feeling nervous, Eva?
00:21:06Oh, well.
00:21:08Too late.
00:21:15Listen, hon.
00:21:16I believe you.
00:21:18But how could Max afford a car like that?
00:21:22Mr. Smith,
00:21:23don't worry.
00:21:23It's my car.
00:21:24Okay?
00:21:24It's not stolen.
00:21:26Yeah?
00:21:27If it's yours,
00:21:27then prove it.
00:21:29Cops will be here in 15 minutes.
00:21:32Enjoy Christmas behind bars.
00:21:34Okay.
00:21:34I'll prove that it's mine.
00:21:36But then you have to get lost.
00:21:38And never show your face
00:21:39around my wife or child again.
00:21:41Oh,
00:21:41so you're a tough guy, huh?
00:21:43Well, I hope they serve eggnog in prison.
00:21:45Loser!
00:21:46Say one more word
00:21:47and I'll give him a real reason
00:21:48to take me in.
00:21:51Jesus.
00:21:52Maybe he is a crime boss.
00:21:54It's kind of sexy, though.
00:21:55Here.
00:21:59Title and proof of ownership.
00:22:08Mr.
00:22:08Harrison?
00:22:12Mr. Harrison?
00:22:16Mr. Harrison?
00:22:18Just play along.
00:22:20Merry Christmas, Willie.
00:22:22Now get the fuck out of here
00:22:23before I kick your ass
00:22:24all the way up to the North Pole.
00:22:26Yes, sir!
00:22:27I'm so sorry, sir!
00:22:29Please,
00:22:30let me tell my serious apologies.
00:22:31Please.
00:22:41That William?
00:22:44What a jerk, huh?
00:22:46He fooled me.
00:22:47What can I say?
00:22:48Let's not let this little misunderstanding
00:22:50ruin the holidays.
00:22:51Oh, now you don't want to ruin Christmas?
00:22:54Oh, come on, Eva.
00:22:55We were just looking out for you.
00:22:57Please forgive us, Mr. Harrison.
00:22:59You know my youngest son is graduating.
00:23:01Soon.
00:23:02Do you think that, uh,
00:23:04you could help him get his foot in the door?
00:23:06A job at the Harrison Group
00:23:08even in the mailroom would open doors.
00:23:11We are family, aren't we?
00:23:13Family takes care of each other.
00:23:16If you guys want a job at the Harrison Group,
00:23:18you can put in an application like everyone else.
00:23:20Abigail, come on.
00:23:22Talk to her for us.
00:23:24Didn't you just say that my daughter was undateable?
00:23:27Yeah.
00:23:28I think you need to take care of your own issues first.
00:23:30My daughter is just far too busy.
00:23:33You're the best life for my new son-in-law.
00:23:35Come on, guys.
00:23:37Let's go in.
00:23:38Welcome to the family.
00:23:42Welcome.
00:23:43Come on in.
00:23:44Come on in.
00:23:48This is your fault, Pam.
00:23:50You can't tell the difference between AI and reality.
00:23:54My fault.
00:23:55You were the one who was pushing her onto that worm, William.
00:23:57Hey, how do you have that car?
00:24:10And how do you know the CEO of Harrison Group?
00:24:12And how do you...
00:24:12I told you.
00:24:13I work for Harrison Group.
00:24:15Remember?
00:24:15I have a friend in high places.
00:24:18A friend who just hands you keys to million-dollar,
00:24:21one-of-a-kind luxury cars?
00:24:22Yes.
00:24:23It's the season of giving.
00:24:25He knows people.
00:24:27Has connections.
00:24:28He's a big deal kind of guy.
00:24:30You're a crime boss, aren't you?
00:24:32Yeah, and you best not forget it.
00:24:33Capisce?
00:24:34Oh, my God.
00:24:35Just don't blow your cover.
00:24:38Dad!
00:24:39Mom!
00:24:40Thank you so much for letting Max and I stay in your home.
00:24:43Oh, honey.
00:24:44We're just so happy that you found such a handsome, strong, good-looking...
00:24:50I think they get it, hon.
00:24:52Uh, how's Piper?
00:24:55Oh, she's fine.
00:24:56One of you guys just gets settled in, and we will go check on her.
00:25:00And if your mom takes a cold shower, we'll come back and finish decorating the tree.
00:25:05Great.
00:25:06See you in a bit, shall we?
00:25:08What are you doing?
00:25:11Okay.
00:25:13Hey, was that not a breach of contract?
00:25:16Relax.
00:25:19It was just a hug.
00:25:22Ugh.
00:25:24We just got here, and I'm already exhausted.
00:25:26You'll be okay.
00:25:28It's just one week.
00:25:29Kill me now.
00:25:30Well, I would, but I need to get paid.
00:25:37What are you doing?
00:25:39That's weird.
00:25:41They were so lovey-dovey just a second ago.
00:25:43I don't know.
00:25:44Something just feels off.
00:25:46This is ridiculous.
00:25:48I mean, what do you want him to do?
00:25:49Make him a promise to prove him?
00:25:52Something like this.
00:25:54Later.
00:25:57Let's go.
00:26:01Here we go.
00:26:04Piper is all tucked in, honey.
00:26:06Everything looks amazing, and happy holidays.
00:26:08To the newest member of our family, Max.
00:26:12Oh.
00:26:13Welcome.
00:26:14Cheers.
00:26:15Thank you, Miss Smith.
00:26:16Looks great.
00:26:17Oh, just call me mom, honey.
00:26:19I had no idea what you liked, so I just whipped up a little bit of everything.
00:26:24But we all know what Eva's favorite Christmas dish is, right?
00:26:28Mmm.
00:26:29Oh, no.
00:26:29Mom's testing him.
00:26:30She's trying to see if he's legit.
00:26:32You mean to tell me you two are married, and you don't even know my baby girl's favorite food?
00:26:39Ow.
00:26:40Eva, sweetie.
00:26:42Kicking my foot.
00:26:43Oh, sorry, mom.
00:26:45Oh, jeez.
00:26:46Oh, jeez.
00:26:47What are you doing?
00:26:47It's okay.
00:26:49Look, mom, of course he knows it.
00:26:50I would like to hear Max say it.
00:26:5212 pumpkin pies.
00:27:06Did I hear this right?
00:27:08They're the best kind.
00:27:10Well, of course.
00:27:11It's pumpkin pie.
00:27:13See?
00:27:15Are you happy now?
00:27:16That's good, but something still feels off.
00:27:19Mom, don't make it weird, okay?
00:27:21We had a whirlwind romance, and we eloped before we got to know everything about each
00:27:27other, but our marriage is real.
00:27:29I guess your mom's just watching too many of those real short shows.
00:27:33Ah, now those are quality.
00:27:37Okay, well, then answer this.
00:27:40Where's your wedding ring, Eva?
00:27:44Where's your wedding ring, Eva?
00:27:48I knew it was a good idea to pick this up.
00:27:50Well, um, it's...
00:27:53Silly face.
00:27:54Dropped it outside on the sidewalk.
00:27:56Luckily, I was there to pick it up for her.
00:27:59Silly face.
00:28:01I am not paying extra for this.
00:28:04Consider it a Christmas gift.
00:28:06Those blazers.
00:28:07It's nice.
00:28:09You can afford this on a waste manager's salary?
00:28:12Well, believe it or not, Miss Smith, there is a lot of garbage out there.
00:28:15And I'm not just talking about William.
00:28:18I'll drink to that.
00:28:20I agree with you there.
00:28:21So, come on, guys.
00:28:23Let's see.
00:28:23Come on.
00:28:24And this is where y'all will be staying.
00:28:39I have another room set up for Piper.
00:28:42Nice and festive for you.
00:28:44No complications, right?
00:28:46Sorry, honey.
00:28:47Uh, mom, you know what?
00:28:48I should stay with Piper tonight.
00:28:50Oh, honey.
00:28:51Newlyweds shouldn't sleep apart.
00:28:55Oh, I just remembered.
00:28:57The city's turning the water off at 10.
00:28:59Something about water conservation.
00:29:01That means you have 15 minutes to shower.
00:29:0315 minutes?
00:29:05Honey, it's no big deal.
00:29:06Just shower together.
00:29:09Shower together?
00:29:13Just shower together.
00:29:14Okay, you guys.
00:29:15Have a good night, okay?
00:29:16Okay.
00:29:18Oh, you heard her.
00:29:42Oh, whoa!
00:29:44Why are you stripping?
00:29:46Well, I can't take a shower.
00:29:47Let me close on.
00:29:49Come on, we're wasting time.
00:29:50You have 15 minutes.
00:29:51Nice try.
00:29:52I am not showering with you.
00:29:54All right, suit yourself.
00:29:55More room for me in there.
00:29:57Not if I meet you there first.
00:29:58Come on, Max.
00:30:12Come on, Max.
00:30:17Get out of the way.
00:30:19We agreed, nothing physical.
00:30:20You're the one with the dirty thoughts, wifey.
00:30:22Relax.
00:30:23I won't touch you, unless you say you want me to.
00:30:29But that'll cost extra.
00:30:30I won't touch you, unless you say you want me to.
00:30:31But that'll cost extra.
00:30:32Hmm.
00:30:40In your dreams.
00:30:42Free to join me.
00:30:43You know, if you keep staring at my ass, you're not going to have me shower while you're left.
00:31:07You wish.
00:31:08Why aren't you getting in?
00:31:10Pray you'll fall for me.
00:31:12It's you who has to worry about resisting me.
00:31:15Oh, yeah?
00:31:16True.
00:31:28Holy shit.
00:31:29This is going to be harder than I thought.
00:31:37I'll say.
00:31:38What happened to all that cool guy confidence?
00:31:42Still think you can lose this?
00:31:44Oh, baby.
00:31:46I don't think I want to.
00:31:52Max, I shut up.
00:31:57Or maybe we should.
00:31:58God, he's such a good kisser.
00:32:02Why does this feel so familiar?
00:32:10Oh, we're so sexy.
00:32:21Max, we cannot do this.
00:32:23What?
00:32:24I didn't mean to cross any...
00:32:26It's not you, Max.
00:32:27It's us.
00:32:28It's this.
00:32:28This is all an act.
00:32:29Let's not make it more complicated than it is.
00:32:32You're right.
00:32:35I'm sorry.
00:32:36I just don't mean to be sorry.
00:32:38Just...
00:32:42That birthmark.
00:32:47What is that?
00:32:55It's him.
00:32:56The man from New Year's.
00:32:57Is he...
00:32:58Piper's father?
00:33:02Why are you acting?
00:33:06Oh, my God.
00:33:07Max is Piper's father.
00:33:10Are you okay?
00:33:11Yeah.
00:33:12I just, um...
00:33:14I just got lightheaded.
00:33:15I think I just need a few more minutes.
00:33:17Alone.
00:33:20Of course.
00:33:23We have a daughter together.
00:33:25Oh, my God.
00:33:27What do I do?
00:33:34I'm going to sleep on the floor.
00:33:36You can take the bed.
00:33:38Thanks.
00:33:40Hey.
00:33:42Are you sure you're okay?
00:33:44Look, fake marriage aside,
00:33:45I'm your husband for the next few days.
00:33:48So if there's something you need,
00:33:49I can help.
00:33:51I want to help.
00:33:53He's Piper's father.
00:33:54He has a right to know.
00:33:56Um, Max.
00:33:59How would you feel
00:34:01if you found out you had a kid?
00:34:03A child?
00:34:08No, no, no.
00:34:09That's impossible.
00:34:10I'm very careful.
00:34:13Mostly.
00:34:15I just mean I'm not the type of guy
00:34:17to sleep around.
00:34:18Family to me is a big commitment,
00:34:20and I don't want any loose ends.
00:34:23You know?
00:34:24Right.
00:34:26He wouldn't want a kid tying him down.
00:34:28I shouldn't tell him about Piper.
00:34:31Why do you ask?
00:34:32No reason.
00:34:34Just, just curious.
00:34:36No, I feel like you're
00:34:37going somewhere with this.
00:34:39What?
00:34:41No.
00:34:42Well, then,
00:34:43can I ask you a question?
00:34:45Shoot.
00:34:46Where did you get these?
00:34:52And how did you know my exact size?
00:34:55I did not get those.
00:34:57I don't know where those came from.
00:34:59Are you sure you're just not trying to
00:35:01break the contract?
00:35:02I don't know where those came from.
00:35:04Oh, no, no, no.
00:35:05Stop coming.
00:35:05Come here.
00:35:07Woo!
00:35:18Elon,
00:35:19the truth is
00:35:21is that I...
00:35:24Go, go, go, go, go.
00:35:27Just a second.
00:35:28Come in.
00:35:29Hey hon
00:35:31Oh
00:35:42Sorry for interrupting
00:35:44But Piper is asking for a bedtime story
00:35:47Before I tuck her in
00:35:48Think you can take this one dad?
00:35:50We're kind of in the middle of something
00:35:51I can see that
00:35:53Well why don't I read it to her
00:35:56I mean if you don't mind
00:35:57Well, atta boy
00:35:59You know what, just put a shirt on
00:36:01I'm gonna go get her
00:36:03Piper, here comes Grandpa
00:36:05He sprang to his sleigh
00:36:09To his team gave a whistle
00:36:11And away they all flew
00:36:13Like the down of a thistle
00:36:14But I heard him exclaim
00:36:16As he drove out of sight
00:36:18Merry Christmas to all
00:36:20And to all
00:36:22A good night
00:36:23If Piper knew he was her real dad
00:36:28She'd be over the moon
00:36:29Good night Piper
00:36:31Is her dad still around?
00:36:37Yeah, but he doesn't know it
00:36:39Because you are her dad
00:36:41Uh, no
00:36:42That man has no idea
00:36:45What a treasure
00:36:46He's missing out on
00:36:49Do you really think so?
00:36:53From the bottom of my heart
00:36:55Maybe I should tell him
00:36:57He deserves to know
00:36:58Max
00:37:05You're Piper's father
00:37:11I'll tell you when the time's right
00:37:19Where's Piper?
00:37:46She must have snuck off
00:37:47While we were asleep
00:37:48God, he's such a good kisser
00:38:06Just gonna kiss and run?
00:38:17Not on my watch
00:38:18Yeah, this
00:38:23I remember this
00:38:25Good morning, you two love bugs
00:38:37How was your stay at Chateau Smith?
00:38:41Good morning, Miss Smith
00:38:42It was, uh, it was great
00:38:43Wonderful
00:38:44Well, it's about to get even better
00:38:46Oh, no
00:38:50What is that?
00:38:51Sardines and saltines
00:38:52It's a Smith family classic
00:38:54It was my Graham Graham's favorite
00:38:56During wartime
00:38:57Don't be shy
00:38:58Go ahead, grab a handful
00:38:59Max, you don't have to
00:39:02No, no, it's okay
00:39:04It's a Smith family staple
00:39:07It's a Smith family staple
00:39:07There we go
00:39:09Yeah, it's a Smith family
00:39:13Good?
00:39:14Good?
00:39:15Good?
00:39:16Good?
00:39:17Well, you two better get dressed
00:39:33You gotta go see Aunt Miranda
00:39:34Could I, um, could I have some water, please?
00:39:39That means there's no escaping Aunt Miranda and her brood this year
00:39:42What's the deal with them?
00:39:44Every year Aunt Miranda bullies Piper and I
00:39:47Says Piper's a fatherless brat and I'm
00:39:50Hey, don't worry
00:39:52I'll protect you and Piper
00:39:55Better have Sam on standby tonight
00:39:59Just in case
00:40:00Well
00:40:01Looks like it's time to get dressed up then
00:40:15Wait, that earring
00:40:16Wait, that earring
00:40:20You like it?
00:40:22I was so bummed when I lost the matching one years ago
00:40:24Did you lose it seven years ago?
00:40:27I don't really remember the details
00:40:29But luckily, I was able to find a new pair
00:40:32Right
00:40:33Yeah, it's just a common earring
00:40:35Anyone can have it
00:40:37Maybe I'm reading too much into it
00:40:38She can't be the woman from seven years ago
00:40:41So Ava and Piper still aren't here
00:40:47But Derek said that Ava got married
00:40:50What kind of man could she possibly have landed?
00:40:54An aging single mom
00:40:56Slim pickings
00:40:58I heard he's in waste management
00:41:00That explains it
00:41:02She's probably too embarrassed to show up
00:41:04Oh, please, Miranda
00:41:06Look, Ava is your niece
00:41:08Oh, come on, Grandpa
00:41:10Everyone knows Ava had a kid with a random one-night stand
00:41:14Her track record speaks for itself
00:41:16Exactly
00:41:16Not like my Sierra
00:41:18Married to a legal advisor for Harrison Group
00:41:21Oh, they're here
00:41:25Merry Christmas, everybody
00:41:27Merry Christmas, everybody
00:41:33Merry Christmas
00:41:34You must be Grandpa Harold
00:41:37I am
00:41:38I'm Ava's husband
00:41:40Max
00:41:40Pleasure to meet you
00:41:42Welcome
00:41:42You're Ava's husband
00:41:43But you're gorgeous
00:41:47But what is handsome as you?
00:41:51Look at you two
00:41:52You look like you just stepped out of a movie
00:41:54Merry Christmas, Grandpa
00:41:55Merry Christmas
00:41:56This is from Max and I
00:41:58Oh, my goodness
00:41:59Thank you, Eva
00:42:00Let me grab that for you, Daddy
00:42:02Oops!
00:42:04Oh, my bad
00:42:05Oh, a homemade gift
00:42:08How thrifty
00:42:09Not all gifts are about the price tag
00:42:12Mommy's right, you mean, I'll hack
00:42:14You little
00:42:16You will not lay a hand on my daughter
00:42:20Or you will lose yours
00:42:21Oh, I think you broke my wrist
00:42:25Look what you just did to my mother
00:42:27My husband is Harrison Group's top legal advisor
00:42:30He could ruin your life
00:42:44Mommy, are you okay?
00:42:46I'm fine
00:42:46I'm just wet, huh?
00:42:48Yeah
00:42:48It's okay
00:42:49It's okay
00:42:49What are you?
00:42:54Don't you dare disrespect my husband
00:42:57Did you just slap me?
00:42:59Next time it'll be a closed fist
00:43:01You're a fucking psycho
00:43:03You know what, Sierra?
00:43:03I can take your little insults
00:43:05But leave my family out of this
00:43:07Her family
00:43:10She needs me
00:43:14You okay, honey?
00:43:18Do I look okay to you, dumbass?
00:43:20Do something
00:43:21You don't know who you're messing with
00:43:23I've got the full weight of the Harrison Group behind me
00:43:26Oh, wow
00:43:26I'm sure the CEO would love to hear
00:43:29That you're using his company's name to bully people
00:43:32Like you'd have any idea how a CEO thinks
00:43:35Let's call him
00:43:36I'm sure he'd be more than happy to be on my side
00:43:38Please
00:43:40Who do you think you are?
00:43:42Enough!
00:43:44There will be no arguing during Christmas
00:43:47Fine, Dad
00:43:49Let it go, Nathan
00:43:50They're just jealous
00:43:52For Grandpa's sake
00:43:55I'll let you off easy
00:43:56I think you owe Nathan a thank you
00:44:00I think you owe me a thank you
00:44:02For slapping some sense into you
00:44:03Do you want me to get the other cheek?
00:44:05Alright, that's enough
00:44:06Everyone come inside
00:44:08And sit down
00:44:09Is this a joke?
00:44:31Can you please pass me some food?
00:44:33Hold it
00:44:34Who said you could eat anything else?
00:44:37My husband and I paid for this feast
00:44:39My husband and I paid for this feast
00:44:45King crab, fresh from Alaska
00:44:48And grass-fed wagyu
00:44:50Three times the price
00:44:52Fifty times the flavor
00:44:54And you don't get a single bite
00:44:56It's just petty
00:44:58Maybe so
00:44:59But gourmet food isn't meant for bottom feeders
00:45:03Fine
00:45:04Then we won't stay and eat with you
00:45:07Come on, let's go
00:45:08No, no
00:45:09Don't you dare
00:45:10Leave our family dinner
00:45:12Grandpa, I'm sorry
00:45:14But they're treating us like
00:45:15I know, dear
00:45:16I just want to have our family together
00:45:18Fine
00:45:19We'll let the strays sit and eat with us
00:45:22Better a stray than a bitch
00:45:24What was that?
00:45:29I just want to have our family together
00:45:31Fine
00:45:32We'll stay
00:45:33Can I have a little napole?
00:45:37It's okay, sweetie
00:45:37We'll get something right after
00:45:39Like drive-thru?
00:45:42I hope you enjoy food poisoning
00:45:44That will be a particularly memorable Christmas present
00:45:48No strays
00:45:50Al, sweetie, are you okay?
00:45:52Yes, I'm fine
00:45:53You hit my child
00:45:55You're fucking crazy
00:45:56Well, if you'd teach her some manners
00:45:58Maybe I wouldn't have to
00:46:00Don't worry, baby
00:46:05I'll handle it
00:46:06Don't worry, baby
00:46:09I'll handle it
00:46:10Piper
00:46:14Sweetie
00:46:16Are you ready to try the best food you've ever had in your life?
00:46:22Okay, sweetheart
00:46:22Give me two minutes
00:46:24Or one phone call
00:46:25As if you have a chef on speed dial
00:46:28Actually, I do
00:46:29He's such a liar
00:46:31This ought to be hilarious
00:46:33Oh
00:46:34It will be
00:46:35Sam
00:46:38Yeah, send the troops
00:46:40And bring that king crab from Antarctica
00:46:42I'm already on my way
00:46:44Bring that king crab from Antarctica
00:46:49I'm already on my way
00:46:51You hear this guy?
00:46:54He wants the best king crab in the world
00:46:56From Antarctica
00:46:58Now I get why you married him, Eva
00:47:01His silly delusions are just adorable
00:47:04Max, what are you doing?
00:47:06Don't worry about it, sweetheart
00:47:08Santa's already on his way
00:47:09Actually
00:47:10Actually
00:47:10Five
00:47:12Four
00:47:13Three
00:47:14Two
00:47:15One
00:47:17A helicopter?
00:47:26There's no way
00:47:28How did you pull this off?
00:47:35Sam is like family
00:47:36I thought I'd introduce you to
00:47:37Thanks, boss
00:47:38Boss?
00:47:41Eva's always been genuine with me
00:47:42Maybe it's time she knew who I really am
00:47:45Eva, I think it's time you actually know the truth
00:47:48I'm Maximus Harrison
00:47:51You're the CEO of Harrison Group?
00:47:56Mm-hmm
00:47:56Come on
00:48:00You can stop kidding around
00:48:03If you were the CEO, why would you be here
00:48:05Pretending to be my husband?
00:48:07No, I actually am the CEO
00:48:09Come on
00:48:09You can stop the charade
00:48:10Okay, this is just another favor from that bigwig friend, isn't it?
00:48:14Eva
00:48:14I'm not pretending
00:48:15Mr. Harrison, the Antarctic king crab as you requested
00:48:21How is this possible?
00:48:33This loser brings Antarctic king crab and has his own personal chef?
00:48:39Who are you?
00:48:40I told you, I'm Eva's husband
00:48:42That chef called him Mr. Harrison
00:48:45Wait, no, hold on
00:48:48You're the actual CEO of the Harrison Group?
00:48:54You're worth more than some whole countries
00:48:56Some of the small ones
00:48:58I mean, you know that
00:49:00You work for me
00:49:02Oh God
00:49:02I insulted my own boss
00:49:04I'm finished
00:49:06Oh God
00:49:11I insulted my own boss
00:49:13I'm finished
00:49:15Didn't think Max would commit this hard
00:49:17Pretending to be CEO is a hell of a move
00:49:20Worth every penny I'm paying him
00:49:21For tonight
00:49:22Your feast ends
00:49:24And with that
00:49:25Your career
00:49:26You're fired
00:49:27Fired?
00:49:29Sam
00:49:30Fired?
00:49:35God
00:49:35I can't be fired
00:49:37What?
00:49:39Mr. Harrison, please
00:49:41You can have as much crab as you want
00:49:43Please, Mr. Harrison
00:49:44I'll do anything
00:49:45Guys
00:49:46Take out the trash
00:49:48And you
00:49:54Oh, me?
00:49:56Mr. Harrison, come on
00:49:58That was a Christmas joke
00:50:00A family tradition
00:50:01Yeah, well
00:50:02There's a new family tradition
00:50:04Sam
00:50:05Will you do me the honors?
00:50:12Gladly
00:50:12Merry Christmas, Aunt William
00:50:17Father, do something
00:50:22Well, you kind of deserve that
00:50:25I'm leaving
00:50:26Mmm, pumpkin
00:50:28My favorite
00:50:28Come on, sweetie
00:50:35Daddy had the scrapped line
00:50:37Just for you
00:50:38Eat as much as you want
00:50:39Thanks, Daddy
00:50:40I am so sorry I ruined your Christmas
00:50:46I just couldn't take them treating you like that
00:50:48Honestly
00:50:48This is the best Christmas I've ever had
00:50:52Well, if you want
00:50:53We can have many more
00:50:54Just like this
00:50:55Does he really mean that?
00:50:58Or is he just playing the part?
00:50:59I can't tell
00:51:00And that terrifies me
00:51:02Merry Christmas, Mrs. Harrison
00:51:08I brought you a gift
00:51:10Here's the paternity test
00:51:11Between the boss and that little girl
00:51:12Oh
00:51:13This is wonderful
00:51:20Sam, I have a granddaughter
00:51:23Tell me everything
00:51:25Miss Eva Smith
00:51:26Single mother
00:51:27Small town gal
00:51:28Didn't finish high school
00:51:29Who currently works in retail
00:51:30Oh, Maximus
00:51:32I thought I raised you better
00:51:34A high school dropout
00:51:36In the Harrison family?
00:51:38Not a chance
00:51:41She is clearly
00:51:45Unfit to raise my granddaughter
00:51:47Maximus seems to like her
00:51:48Silence
00:51:49Get me the address where she works
00:51:51It's Happy Heels
00:51:52On Broadway
00:51:53That's nice
00:51:54We own that one
00:51:56Good work
00:51:57But take off that stupid hat
00:51:59Thanks
00:52:10So your dad insisted
00:52:11That I try this wine
00:52:13That he's been saving
00:52:13For 20 years
00:52:14Sounds like he's happy
00:52:17With his new son-in-law
00:52:18And how about you?
00:52:23Me?
00:52:24Yeah
00:52:25Are you happy with your new husband?
00:52:32Eva
00:52:32That birthmark
00:52:44Family to me is a big commitment
00:52:46And I don't want any loose ends
00:52:49You know?
00:52:51Maximus, there's so much we don't know
00:52:52So much we're not telling each other
00:52:54No feelings, no complications
00:52:58That's what we agreed upon
00:52:59Yeah, I didn't sign a contract
00:53:01Max
00:53:03Yeah, I guess you're right
00:53:04It's cold
00:53:07Maybe I'll go grab some more firewood
00:53:10Max
00:53:12I need to tell you something
00:53:15Something important
00:53:19What's gotten into her?
00:53:21Is she hiding something?
00:53:23Is this the part where you tell me there's no Santa?
00:53:26I haven't been completely honest with you
00:53:28Piper is
00:53:31Piper is
00:53:36Mommy, Daddy, my hand hurts
00:53:38Sweetie
00:53:40Oh my gosh
00:53:41It's unswollen
00:53:42Must have been when that witch smacked her with the fork earlier
00:53:44Listen, you stay here with Daddy
00:53:46Mommy's gonna go get a first date kit, okay?
00:53:47Come on, Piper
00:53:51Okay, let me see
00:53:55I promise
00:53:59I won't let anyone
00:54:00hurt you or Mommy again
00:54:02But that's not true
00:54:03You're leaving after Christmas, aren't you?
00:54:07Uh...
00:54:08Daddy!
00:54:09No!
00:54:11What?
00:54:11What?
00:54:11Don't you dare disrespect my husband
00:54:19Well, maybe I don't have to leave
00:54:24Well, maybe I don't have to leave
00:54:28Really?
00:54:28Please stay, Daddy
00:54:30You think it was Sky?
00:54:35I wouldn't worry about it
00:54:41Scars make you look like a badass
00:54:42I have one, too
00:54:43Dad
00:54:45I got that when I was about your age
00:54:48Some punk came at me with a switchblade
00:54:51Really?
00:54:52No way
00:54:52No
00:54:53It was actually a cactus
00:54:55But it's still cool
00:54:57I have something like that on the back of my neck
00:55:01Piper
00:55:04How long have you had that?
00:55:06My mom said I had that when I was born
00:55:08And how old are you?
00:55:15Six
00:55:16Six?
00:55:17That one night stand was about seven years ago
00:55:20Okay, I found the first date kit
00:55:21Ivar, are you sure we haven't met before?
00:55:24What do I even say?
00:55:29And how do I explain it to Piper?
00:55:31Sorry, honey
00:55:32This man's your dad
00:55:33And he didn't know you existed till now
00:55:35Um, yeah
00:55:38Can I see your hand, sweetie?
00:55:42Eva
00:55:43Okay, look
00:55:48Piper is
00:55:52Go on
00:55:58It must be an emergency
00:56:05Excuse me
00:56:07Sorry
00:56:08I took this
00:56:09Mommy, are you okay?
00:56:17Yeah
00:56:18Mommy's just realizing she's a coward
00:56:21I don't even have the guts to tell the truth
00:56:24Why haven't you picked up my calls?
00:56:30I'm telling you, Max
00:56:31That woman is manipulating you
00:56:33She's a high school dropout
00:56:35Doesn't even have a decent job
00:56:37And she's unfit to raise my granddaughter
00:56:40I'm Eva's husband
00:56:41Max
00:56:42That man has no idea
00:56:44What a treasure
00:56:45He's missing out on
00:56:48I'm sorry, Max
00:56:52You can't know Piper's your daughter
00:56:53Your mother would take her away
00:56:55After Christmas
00:56:56It's over
00:56:57Eva?
00:57:01Maximus?
00:57:02Are you even listening to me?
00:57:04No, Mom, Mom
00:57:05Listen
00:57:05I'm sorry, okay?
00:57:07Eva's my wife
00:57:08And I've made up my mind
00:57:09I'm not leaving her
00:57:10Eva?
00:57:19Thank you
00:57:20Oh, how good you are
00:57:24This is for you, Grandma
00:57:25Oh, wow
00:57:31That's so cool
00:57:33What did you make?
00:57:34Uh, Derek
00:57:35This is from
00:57:36Eva and I
00:57:38Oh, thank you so much
00:57:40Thanks, guys
00:57:41Glad you're here
00:57:42Oh
00:57:44Oh
00:57:45Damn, these are nice
00:57:48Grandpa
00:57:48Language
00:57:49Little ears
00:57:51Piper
00:57:56Piper
00:57:56Do you want to go see your present?
00:57:58It's in the other room
00:57:59By the train set
00:58:00Here, I'll go with you
00:58:01Remember the song that we sang?
00:58:03Ready?
00:58:03Ready?
00:58:03Grandma got run over by a reindeer
00:58:06What do we got, guys?
00:58:06Billy
00:58:07Walking home from our house
00:58:08Christmas Eve
00:58:09You never told me
00:58:17Have we met before?
00:58:21She's unfit to raise my granddaughter
00:58:28I don't know what you're getting at
00:58:32Eva, I have the same birthmark as Piper
00:58:37I don't know what you're talking about
00:58:46Lots of people have birthmarks
00:58:47They're very common
00:58:48I feel so awful
00:58:49But I can't lose my child
00:58:51No matter how I feel about him
00:58:53Maybe
00:58:56Are you okay?
00:59:02Are the clogs a bad idea?
00:59:05No
00:59:05I'm fine
00:59:07Um
00:59:09Oh, I almost forgot
00:59:11I got you this
00:59:15You got me a gift, too?
00:59:17Tis the season
00:59:18Open it
00:59:19Gloves
00:59:33Did you make these?
00:59:37Yeah
00:59:37I know this is a fake marriage
00:59:39But that's Christmas
00:59:41You've already done so much for me
00:59:43I just wanted to do a little something for you
00:59:45How did I feel?
00:59:47How did I feel?
00:59:49Warm, right?
00:59:50Yeah
00:59:51Warm
00:59:53Soft
00:59:55Perfect
00:59:57Perfect
00:59:58Thank you, Eva
01:00:02I've never gotten anything this meaningful before
01:00:06I've never gotten anything this meaningful before
01:00:06Really?
01:00:10Yeah, my mom
01:00:11She partied all the time
01:00:12And I got gifts
01:00:14Plenty of them
01:00:15But
01:00:15I don't think she ever bought one herself
01:00:18Nothing personal
01:00:21Well, you deserve it
01:00:23You're a good guy
01:00:25And
01:00:27Someday you'll
01:00:28Find
01:00:29Someone special
01:00:30To
01:00:31Spend all your Christmases with
01:00:32What if that day's today
01:00:35What if I already found someone special
01:00:41Right here
01:00:44Max
01:01:09We can't
01:01:10If you want me to stop
01:01:13You better tell me right now
01:01:15Come on
01:01:20I don't want you to stop
01:01:22No matter how many years pass
01:01:30I still can't resist him
01:01:31It's true
01:01:44It's true
01:01:44It's true
01:01:46I want you
01:01:46Thank you
01:01:48Oh, God, you ain't trying to be fucking insane
01:01:58I'm trying to find out what's going on.
01:02:01Piper!
01:02:10Piper?
01:02:13She can't see us.
01:02:28Eva?
01:02:36Grandma, I'm up here!
01:02:50That was way too close.
01:02:52Yeah.
01:02:53We would have gotten on the naughty list.
01:02:59Sometimes it's fun to be naughty.
01:03:04Can I still unwrap my present?
01:03:08You still haven't given me mine.
01:03:15Let me give it to you.
01:03:28Oh, I don't mean anything.
01:03:29No, no, no.
01:03:30No, no, no...
01:03:40Okay.
01:03:42Okay.
01:03:43What?
01:03:44Who is calling me to serve me?
01:03:59Hello?
01:04:00Hello, Eva Smith.
01:04:02I'm Max's mother.
01:04:04Name your price.
01:04:05What will it take for you to leave my son alone?
01:04:08What?
01:04:09We both know my son is way out of your league.
01:04:12Take the money, leave my granddaughter with us, and go.
01:04:17My son will find a better wife and a better mother for his child.
01:04:20Piper is my daughter.
01:04:22And no amount of money you offer could ever make me give her up.
01:04:25So you keep your money, and I'll leave on my own.
01:04:27But I am not handing Piper over to you.
01:04:32Well, there's my beautiful wife.
01:04:38You okay?
01:04:42Look, we made it through Christmas.
01:04:46So I think it's best we go our separate ways.
01:04:50What are you talking about?
01:04:52It's over.
01:04:53It's not that hard to understand.
01:04:59Eva, wait!
01:05:03So last night meant nothing to you?
01:05:04Max, it's not real.
01:05:12None of it was real.
01:05:14So, it's just a goodbye.
01:05:18Didn't realize I was so disposable for you.
01:05:21Look.
01:05:23Last night,
01:05:24I let my guard down.
01:05:27But I'm a mother, and my choices affect Piper.
01:05:30And being with you can mess up everything between us.
01:05:32But just tell me what you need.
01:05:35I'll do whatever it takes to be a good husband,
01:05:37a good father.
01:05:39Just say the word.
01:05:46You don't get it.
01:05:48You don't get it.
01:05:49I think it's time Piper and I go back to New York.
01:06:03I won't give up on us.
01:06:04Are we here?
01:06:22Yes.
01:06:23As much as I don't want us to be,
01:06:26we're back.
01:06:30Piper, sweetie, wake up.
01:06:32We're home.
01:06:32How can she just walk away?
01:06:46Don't forget, you have to meet my mom.
01:06:48It's part of the agreement, too.
01:06:50Can I just pay you a little extra and skip it?
01:06:53You promised.
01:06:55Eva, I haven't asked you for much.
01:06:57Can you do this for me, please?
01:06:58All right, fine.
01:07:02When?
01:07:04Two days.
01:07:05I'll come pick you up.
01:07:06No need.
01:07:08Just send me the address and I'll meet you there.
01:07:10I know you and Mommy thought,
01:07:18but she still really likes you,
01:07:20so don't give up, okay, Daddy?
01:07:23Thank you, sweetie.
01:07:24If there's one thing you should know about your Daddy,
01:07:26I always fight for the ones I love.
01:07:29If you find me,
01:07:43I'm interested in this, uh,
01:07:44it's true this way.
01:07:45Just do it ten times.
01:07:48Eva's meeting my mother today.
01:07:51Time to finally tell her the truth.
01:07:53Boss?
01:07:55Boss?
01:07:55Lady and gentlemen,
01:08:00I am so sorry.
01:08:02I need to go win back my family.
01:08:05Family?
01:08:06Boss, you okay?
01:08:07Never better.
01:08:10Go get her, Max.
01:08:14Give it your best smile.
01:08:17Ah, there he is.
01:08:20Maximus, darling.
01:08:21I have some prospects for you.
01:08:23Nice high society girls from the city.
01:08:29Oh.
01:08:31I told you.
01:08:33I already found the woman I love.
01:08:37Well, I...
01:08:37Maximus, stop this.
01:08:43That evil woman is scamming you, son.
01:08:46Tell me what kind of woman you want,
01:08:49and I'll find you another.
01:08:50You are heir to the Harrison dynasty.
01:08:53No, I'm not.
01:08:56Oh?
01:08:57I work in waste management,
01:08:59and I'm a secret crime boss.
01:09:01I'm Eva's husband,
01:09:03and I'm a father.
01:09:06What?
01:09:06What?
01:09:06What?
01:09:06What?
01:09:06What?
01:09:07What?
01:09:08What?
01:09:09What?
01:09:09What?
01:09:09What?
01:09:10What?
01:09:10What?
01:09:11What?
01:09:11What?
01:09:12What?
01:09:12What?
01:09:13What?
01:09:13What?
01:09:14What?
01:09:14What?
01:09:15What?
01:09:15What?
01:09:16Oh, that's her.
01:09:21The woman who got my son head over heels.
01:09:26Hi.
01:09:27Welcome in.
01:09:28Can I help you find something?
01:09:30I want to try those.
01:09:34Awesome.
01:09:34I'll get them for you right away.
01:09:37Are you sure you wouldn't want something more sensible?
01:09:43No, no, no.
01:09:44I know what I want.
01:09:45I want her shoes.
01:09:46Size 7.
01:09:48Oh, baby can't even walk, but she wants $3,000 heels.
01:09:52Come on.
01:09:53She wants the white shoes.
01:09:58Ignore her.
01:10:00She's just grumpy over the holidays.
01:10:02Um, here.
01:10:03Let me help you.
01:10:04Come on.
01:10:04She seems kind.
01:10:05I shouldn't be that impressed.
01:10:17She's just doing her job.
01:10:19How do they feel?
01:10:21How do they feel?
01:10:22Well, I love the style, but it's too small.
01:10:26I think I need a size up.
01:10:28Maybe my feet are still growing.
01:10:30Right away.
01:10:34I'll be right back.
01:10:35She's not only kind, she's patient.
01:10:38Was I wrong about her?
01:10:40Are you gluing the heel back on?
01:10:56Well, who gives a shit?
01:10:59She can't walk.
01:11:01That's just pure evil.
01:11:06Oh, come on, St. Eva.
01:11:11She's in a wheelchair.
01:11:13Who cares?
01:11:14It's the last pair.
01:11:15I get paid commission.
01:11:22I'm not doing that, Vanessa.
01:11:24See?
01:11:26This is your whole problem.
01:11:29This is why you'll always be broke.
01:11:33I don't care if she can walk or not.
01:11:37I'm not selling her junk.
01:11:39She has to deal with people like this?
01:11:42People who insult her all day?
01:11:45I'm your manager.
01:11:50Sell the old bitty the shoes or you're fired.
01:12:00Did I stutter?
01:12:02You don't have to fire me.
01:12:10I quit.
01:12:16I don't work here anymore.
01:12:18Listen, don't buy the shoes.
01:12:21They're broken.
01:12:22Spend your hard-earned money elsewhere, okay?
01:12:24You're a good person after all.
01:12:27It looks like I misjudged you.
01:12:29I'm sorry?
01:12:31Why are you still here, Eva?
01:12:35Get out!
01:12:40You're not disabled?
01:12:43Selling a broken heel to someone you thought was handicapped?
01:12:47Absolutely shameful.
01:12:49Who are you?
01:12:51I am the chairwoman of the Harrison Group and the owner of this store.
01:12:58You're Eleanor Harrison, mother of the CEO?
01:13:02I am.
01:13:03And you, my dear, are fired.
01:13:06What did I do?
01:13:08You are a good person.
01:13:12From now on, this store is yours to run.
01:13:16Are you serious?
01:13:19That's right.
01:13:20Don't be nervous, child.
01:13:22You are professional, responsible, far better than that two-bit manager.
01:13:29You, out.
01:13:39I'll leave.
01:13:41I'm leaving.
01:13:45I, I feel like I'm dreaming.
01:13:49No, don't worry.
01:13:51You're getting a promotion.
01:13:53You deserve it, my dear.
01:13:59First assignment, I want that row and that row and the entire display case.
01:14:07Pack it all up and bring it to my house.
01:14:10Okay.
01:14:11Yeah.
01:14:12Once we're home, I'll tell her I'm her mother-in-law.
01:14:17I can't wait to finally meet my granddaughter.
01:14:20She's the mother of a CEO.
01:14:27Of course she lives like this.
01:14:31Mrs. Harrison, I'm here with your delivery.
01:14:45Max?
01:14:46Eva.
01:14:47What are you doing here?
01:14:50I, uh...
01:14:52There you are, Eva.
01:14:55Wonderful we can finally meet each other properly.
01:14:58My new daughter-in-law.
01:15:00What are you...
01:15:02That means you really are the CEO of Harrison Group.
01:15:08Well, I tried to tell you, but...
01:15:11Stop.
01:15:12And you...
01:15:15You lied to me at the store.
01:15:17You were both just testing me?
01:15:20Is this some sick game rich people play?
01:15:22I'm sorry, Eva.
01:15:23I thought you might be using my son just after his money, but I was wrong.
01:15:28Eva, please.
01:15:29I don't deserve to be treated like this.
01:15:31Not every working class girl is after your money.
01:15:34How could you think that of me?
01:15:36It's not like that, dear.
01:15:38Eva, what are you talking about?
01:15:40Mom, what did you do?
01:15:42I was just trying to get the two of you back together.
01:15:45We're not together.
01:15:47And I can't love something that was never real.
01:15:50I made a horrible mistake.
01:15:56What are you waiting for, son?
01:15:58Go after her.
01:15:59Eva.
01:16:00Let me go.
01:16:01I swear, it's not what you think.
01:16:03We come from two completely different worlds.
01:16:05Stop pretending like you care.
01:16:06I'm not pretending, okay?
01:16:07I can't fake what we have.
01:16:08And everything I've done for you, and Piper, this is real.
01:16:12Touch my wife again, and I will snap every finger that you've got.
01:16:16Max, you came.
01:16:17God, you weren't driving me fucking insane.
01:16:31I'll do whatever it takes to be a good husband, a good father.
01:16:35Just say the word.
01:16:38See?
01:16:41Stop fighting.
01:16:45We belong together.
01:16:47You're wrong.
01:16:49Wrong about what?
01:16:51That you care?
01:16:53Or we belong together?
01:16:54Look, I already told you.
01:16:56We're from two completely different worlds.
01:16:58Now, I held up my end of the deal, and I met your mother, like we discussed.
01:17:02Now, I want a fake divorce from my fake husband.
01:17:05I'm sorry, Maximus.
01:17:16Walking away is the only choice I have.
01:17:20Ow!
01:17:25Are you okay, Mommy?
01:17:28Yeah, sweetie, I'm fine.
01:17:30Come here.
01:17:32No, you're not fine.
01:17:40You're sad.
01:17:41Oh.
01:17:42I'm okay, sweetie.
01:17:44I miss Daddy, too.
01:17:48I want Max to be my real daddy.
01:17:54Don't you want to be with him?
01:17:58I love bug.
01:18:02You're right.
01:18:03What am I doing, running like a coward?
01:18:07I've always taught you to be brave.
01:18:10Now it's time for Mommy to be brave, too.
01:18:13I believe in you.
01:18:15What are you gonna do, Mommy?
01:18:17I know exactly what to say to him.
01:18:22Maximus deserves to know, Piper is his daughter.
01:18:29Enough sulking.
01:18:33Go get your wife and my grandbaby back.
01:18:37Don't you think I want to?
01:18:39She doesn't want me.
01:18:41I didn't raise you to give up.
01:18:43Your daughter is still out there.
01:18:44You can't abandon her.
01:18:46Mom, you don't get it.
01:18:48I made a deal with Eva to play my wife.
01:18:51And Piper, she was an added bonus.
01:18:55What are you talking about?
01:18:57I already ran a DNA test.
01:18:59Piper is your daughter.
01:19:02What?
01:19:03See for yourself.
01:19:09I was right.
01:19:12Seven years ago.
01:19:13New Years, that woman was evil.
01:19:16Eva!
01:19:26Eva!
01:19:28Hey!
01:19:30Daddy!
01:19:32Daddy!
01:19:33Piper!
01:19:35Oh!
01:19:37I missed you so much, sweetheart.
01:19:39You came back.
01:19:48I, uh...
01:19:51Don't forget to be brave, Mommy.
01:19:57I, uh...
01:20:01I was scared.
01:20:02But I don't want to be scared anymore.
01:20:05Because what we have is real and it's worth fighting for.
01:20:09Sweetheart, I have something to tell you.
01:20:12I have something to tell you, too.
01:20:16Piper is your daughter.
01:20:17Piper is your daughter.
01:20:18You knew.
01:20:20My sweet granddaughter.
01:20:22Mama!
01:20:26Well, I just found out for sure a few minutes ago.
01:20:28But you've known this whole time?
01:20:30I was scared.
01:20:31Okay, I didn't know if you were going to take her from me.
01:20:34I didn't know how you were feeling.
01:20:36How could you not know how I felt?
01:20:51I love you, Eva.
01:20:54I love you, too.
01:20:56I promise.
01:20:57For the rest of my life, I'm going to make it up to you.
01:21:02As long as we're together, it doesn't matter where we are.
01:21:05Will you marry me, Eva?
01:21:17For real this time?
01:21:18Yes.
01:21:19Yes, of course.
01:21:21I'll marry you.
01:21:22I love you.
01:21:35Looks like you're stuck with me the next Christmas.
01:21:37And the Christmas after that.
01:21:39And forever.
01:21:42I wouldn't have it any other way.
01:21:44Who's that?
01:21:49Eva!
01:21:54Take me back!
01:21:57I'm sorry!
01:21:58I struck your tire!
01:22:02Looks like I have to take out the trash.
01:22:04Again.
01:22:07No?
01:22:08Not funny?
01:22:09I'll see you again.
01:22:10No, I don't know.
01:22:13I'll find you right now, I'm sorry, I'll see you.
01:22:17I don't know, I'll see you later.
01:22:21See you later, if you ever Sense Guy's Occup,
01:22:23you'll end your day next week.
01:22:26Bye.
01:22:26記得.
01:22:28Thanks for the rest.
01:22:30Yeah.
01:22:32We 달�lanche.
01:22:33Bye.
01:22:34Bye.
01:22:35Good to move.
01:22:36Bye.
01:22:37Bye.
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