- 2 giorni fa
The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012) is a fun and adventurous animated comedy that follows a quirky pirate captain and his crew as they embark on a series of entertaining escapades. Along the way, they encounter unexpected challenges, clever schemes, and plenty of humorous situations that test their creativity and teamwork.
Filled with lively characters, witty dialogue, and imaginative scenarios, the film highlights friendship, determination, and the joy of working together to overcome obstacles. Its colorful animation and playful storytelling make it a delightful experience for audiences of all ages.
Featuring engaging performances and a charming narrative, The Pirates! Band of Misfits delivers a family-friendly adventure full of laughter, excitement, and memorable moments.
Filled with lively characters, witty dialogue, and imaginative scenarios, the film highlights friendship, determination, and the joy of working together to overcome obstacles. Its colorful animation and playful storytelling make it a delightful experience for audiences of all ages.
Featuring engaging performances and a charming narrative, The Pirates! Band of Misfits delivers a family-friendly adventure full of laughter, excitement, and memorable moments.
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00:20:38Journal of Charles Darwin, day 93 aboard the Beagle
00:20:45I have today discovered a new kind of barnacle
00:20:51Which I have categorized in the order of pygophora
00:20:57I'll never get a girlfriend, I am so unhappy
00:21:08And now, I'm being attacked by pirates
00:21:23I'm the pirate captain, and I'm here for your gold
00:21:41I haven't got any gold
00:21:44No gold, eh?
00:21:46Then what might I ask is this?
00:21:49It's a baboon's kidney
00:21:50Oh, and what about this?
00:21:55It's another baboon's kidney
00:21:57We searched the hold, captain
00:22:01And?
00:22:03Just creatures, bits of creatures in jars
00:22:07And an unhappy-looking baboon
00:22:09What kind of ship is this?
00:22:15Uh, we're a, uh, well, we were a scientific expedition
00:22:20Charles Darwin, at your service
00:22:23Oh, for bities
00:22:25Hey, is it so much to ask?
00:22:29Is it?
00:22:30Yeah
00:22:30I just want one tiny bit of success
00:22:32One teensy, weensy bit of respect for my peers
00:22:37Just once in my life
00:22:38Is that such a crime?
00:22:41Is it?
00:22:44Um, um, no
00:22:45No!
00:22:47No
00:22:47Oh, but you try telling that to the universe
00:22:50Just once
00:22:51Just once for things to go right
00:22:53Just once
00:22:54So, um, are we done here?
00:23:06Dear diary
00:23:07About to meet a watery grave
00:23:10It's nothing personal, you understand
00:23:13It's just, uh, it's been a tough week
00:23:14And a good plank walk
00:23:16Usually, cheers and love
00:23:17We'll die
00:23:19Without reaching second base for the lady
00:23:21Oh, get on with it
00:23:23Today's weather
00:23:27In Clement
00:23:29Stop!
00:23:38Oh, now what?
00:23:39Last request, is it?
00:23:40Do we have to grant those?
00:23:41Is there some sort of human rights convention we're signed up to?
00:23:44That bird!
00:23:45My parrot?
00:23:46She's just big boned
00:23:48No, she's not
00:23:48I mean, I mean, she's not a parrot
00:23:50Not a parrot?
00:23:51What's he on about, old girl?
00:23:54She's, she's
00:23:55She's the scientific discovery of our age
00:23:57Sorry, it's just
00:24:03That's my favourite bit
00:24:06A doo-doo, you say?
00:24:13They've been extinct for 150 years
00:24:16To find one alive today
00:24:18It's quite incredible
00:24:19Clever old girl
00:24:21Not going extinct
00:24:23If I might be so bold
00:24:24I would be prepared
00:24:25To pay you 10 pounds
00:24:28For your body
00:24:29Well, he's not for sale
00:24:3110 pounds
00:24:33She's one of the family
00:24:34She's like an auntie
00:24:36With a beak
00:24:37Yeah, I'm afraid they're right, Charles
00:24:38Polly here is the feathery heart and soul of the boat
00:24:41Come on, little doo-doo
00:24:43Oh
00:24:43It's such a missed opportunity
00:24:49If I could have presented her in London
00:24:52To the Royal Society
00:24:53Their annual science show
00:24:54No question of that, I'm afraid
00:24:56She'd have been an absolute sensation
00:24:58Yeah, well, can't be helped
00:24:59And of course a shoe-in for the top prize
00:25:01Prize?
00:25:05For best scientific discovery, yes
00:25:08Uh-huh, uh-huh
00:25:09It's prize
00:25:11Valuable?
00:25:14Valuable?
00:25:15Oh
00:25:15It's priceless
00:25:17Untold riches
00:25:20Captain?
00:25:25No, no, no
00:25:25I was thinking perhaps
00:25:26Perhaps I was being a touch hasty
00:25:28But Captain, London
00:25:29The home of Queen Victoria
00:25:31Mortal enemy of pirates everywhere
00:25:33Will end up hanged at execution dock
00:25:36Oh, Pa
00:25:37We laugh in the face of danger, remember?
00:25:40Um, I don't
00:25:41I don't really like danger at all
00:25:43Captain, um
00:25:45Do you remember the little talk we had?
00:25:48The one about where the pigs
00:25:49Were actually a type of fruit
00:25:51No
00:25:53Hmm
00:25:56No
00:25:58The one about us trying to avoid
00:26:00Harebrained schemes
00:26:01That end in us facing certain death
00:26:03You heard the man number two
00:26:04Untold riches
00:26:06Here's the plan
00:26:07We go to London
00:26:09Polly wins this science show thingy
00:26:11We take the prize money
00:26:12I enter pirate of the year
00:26:14I win
00:26:15Bingo
00:26:16But, but, but
00:26:17Captain, I'm not sure
00:26:18It can't fail
00:26:19And besides
00:26:20Look at her little face
00:26:22I sure want to win that science prize
00:26:25Squat
00:26:26Bravo, Captain
00:26:28I see
00:26:29You're a, a, a man of vision
00:26:32Right then, Charles
00:26:34When is this, uh, science show of yours?
00:26:36A week tomorrow
00:26:37Ah, confound it
00:26:39You see, we could have made that
00:26:41With the good wind behind us
00:26:42But unfortunately
00:26:42There's this dirty great sea monster in the way
00:26:44Um, I, I, I, I think they just add those onto maps
00:26:48For decoration
00:26:49Captain
00:26:51Is that a fact?
00:26:56What blew me down?
00:26:57I dare you, you could learn something from this fine fella number two
00:27:01Come out of the coven
00:27:16You boys and girls
00:27:18Come out of the coven
00:27:20See, we ain't got no hide
00:27:22Except for that one
00:27:24The yellow light
00:27:26Ah, London town
00:27:47The most romantic city in the world
00:27:50Queen Victoria welcomes you to London
00:28:11Ah, that's nice
00:28:13Oh, she's not so bad after all
00:28:15We don't look so worried, number two
00:28:23Pirates are always visiting London
00:28:25Turn back!
00:28:30This is the fate of pirates here!
00:28:34Scarlet Morgan
00:28:35Pirate captain
00:28:37Goodness me
00:28:39I haven't seen you since that business in Madagascar
00:28:42Ah, yes
00:28:45I got a sworn they were girls
00:28:47You're looking well, Morgan
00:28:48Yeah, lost a bit of weight
00:28:50What are you up to these days?
00:28:52Oh, you know, this and that
00:28:53Just, just going to enter a science competition, actually
00:28:55Oh, good luck with that
00:28:57Yeah, thanks, thanks
00:28:58Eh?
00:29:01No, no, wait, wait
00:29:02Turn back!
00:29:03Turn back!
00:29:05Sorry!
00:29:11No, no, look where you've got a big boat
00:29:13Look at the sleigh of it
00:29:14I hope you've got some insurance
00:29:15Right then
00:29:18We'll be off
00:29:18I'll bring her back tomorrow
00:29:20Straight after the show
00:29:21Wait a minute, daft, Charles
00:29:21I'll be presenting Polly
00:29:23You?
00:29:24Yeah, yeah, yeah
00:29:24I always fancied trying my hand at a spot of science
00:29:26But you can't
00:29:28I mean
00:29:28The streets of London
00:29:30Are no place for pirates
00:29:31Pirates?
00:29:32What pirates?
00:29:33Nobody here but us girl guides
00:29:35Here he is
00:29:36I've got a badge for looting
00:29:39Well, we're not really girl guides
00:29:41It's us
00:29:41The pirates
00:29:42We're masters of disguise
00:29:44How ingenious
00:29:46But obviously, Captain, best we lie low for the night
00:29:49Perhaps at my house
00:29:51Captain, I really think
00:29:52Good plan, Chuck
00:29:53It'll be fun to see how you boffin types live
00:29:56Well, come on
00:30:00Taxi!
00:30:01Evening officer
00:30:04My, there you go, ladies
00:30:06London smells like grandma
00:30:14Ah, here we are
00:30:25Home sweet home
00:30:27You don't get many women back here, do you, Charles?
00:30:35People who live alone
00:30:36Are always serial killers
00:30:39Sweet Neptune on a bike
00:30:48Oh, don't mind, Mr. Bobo
00:30:50Just an old project of mine
00:30:52Project?
00:30:53Yeah, I had this theory
00:30:54I thought that if you took a monkey
00:30:56Gave him a monocle
00:30:57And covered up his gigantic, unsightly ass
00:31:00Then he would cease to be a monkey
00:31:01And become more of a
00:31:02A man-pansy, if you will
00:31:05Bold theory
00:31:06I don't like the monkey
00:31:08But to be honest
00:31:09Monkey's a ten a penny
00:31:10He's not a patch on Polly here
00:31:13Anyhow, big day tomorrow
00:31:17We all need our rest
00:31:18Let me show you to your room, Captain
00:31:20Right behind you, Chuck
00:31:23Shh, here's the plan
00:31:36I want to do
00:31:37Shh
00:31:43Shh
00:31:44Shh
00:31:45Shh
00:31:47Shh
00:31:48Shh
00:31:49Shh
00:31:50Shh
00:31:51Shh
00:31:52Shh
00:31:53It's, uh, it's Mr. Darwin, sir
00:31:59I'm sure he's up to no good
00:32:00Oh, honestly, number two
00:32:01What's got into you?
00:32:03Thanks to Charles
00:32:04We're about to win lavish untold riches
00:32:05And here you are
00:32:07Trying to find fault with a poor fellow
00:32:08Yes, but...
00:32:09No, no, no, no
00:32:09Not another word
00:32:10A future pirate of the year
00:32:12Needs his beauty sleep
00:32:13Do you think you could make nautical noises
00:32:16Until we drop off?
00:32:21Shh
00:32:22Shh
00:32:23Oh, that's lovely
00:32:25That really is lovely
00:32:26Can you do a shiver of timber?
00:32:27No
00:32:28Mmm
00:32:30Eh, just take it a few gulls, would you?
00:32:35Caw, caw, caw
00:32:38Ho, ho, ho
00:32:43Oh...
00:32:44Grrrr...
00:32:51Grrrr...
00:32:52Grrrr...
00:32:54Grrrr...
00:32:55Whaff...
00:32:56Grrrr...
00:32:59Grrrr...
00:33:00Sì, sì, sì, sì, sì.
00:33:30Grazie a tutti, Pirate Capitaino. Nessun eserci questo più di te.
00:33:38Grazie, Cutlass.
00:33:40E quella peardata di te...
00:33:43...è mi fa male.
00:33:53Give it, give it. Give it back! It's mine!
00:34:00NEPTUNE'S NAVAL!
00:34:05Come back here, you love!
00:34:06Stop me!
00:34:07To the other!
00:34:21I'll take that!
00:34:23Fun up so far, my friend!
00:34:26NUMBER TWO!
00:34:30NUMBER TWO!
00:34:31Are you all right?
00:34:33Unhand that dogo!
00:34:45Evening, Captain!
00:35:00NUMBER TWO!
00:35:07NUMBER TWO!
00:35:09Oh, no, no!
00:35:19We're under attack!
00:35:20Abaddon, Chef!
00:35:26Alla fine, capta!
00:35:27Wired with a scarf?
00:35:39Come back here, Mysterio jettaway, figure!
00:35:47Stop!
00:35:48I'm out of here!
00:36:09Ah, gotcha. Are you all right, girl?
00:36:19Captain, I mean, what's going on?
00:36:22Don't play the innocent!
00:36:24You and your henchmonkey try to steal Polly!
00:36:28Steal Polly? Oh, dear me, no, you're mistaken.
00:36:31Then how do you explain this?
00:36:39Well, I think it's obvious what's happened, isn't it?
00:36:45Is it?
00:36:46Some jealous rival scientist must have tried to make off with the dodo.
00:36:51Well, that explains everything.
00:36:54Captain, please, let's go. Polly's not safe in London.
00:36:58I couldn't bear it if something happened to Polly.
00:37:00Nothing is going to happen to Polly. She'll be perfectly safe. Leave everything to me.
00:37:05Now, come on, we can't keep that prize waiting.
00:37:08Um, anyone got a towel?
00:37:22Nice going, banana butt. Now this briny buffoon is going to grab all the glory. It's a disaster. It's...
00:37:40Bad news, I'm afraid, Captain. You can't go in.
00:37:47Eh?
00:37:48Mmm, it's strictly scientists only, you see. I'll just have to present Polly... myself.
00:37:56We're not really scientists. It's us, the pirates. See? Masters of disguise.
00:38:01But... but where's Polly?
00:38:03That is on a need-to-know basis from here on in, Charles.
00:38:06Pardon?
00:38:07I am keeping her hidden. That shadowy figure... could be anywhere.
00:38:11Luckily, I am not only a master of disguises, I am also a master of hiding things.
00:38:16Right lads, let's show these boffets what's what.
00:38:19But... Captain! Really, I... I... I...
00:38:22Hello!
00:38:23We're here for the science show. We're scientists.
00:38:27That's a fit-fet. This is Charles Darwin, and I am the scientist captain.
00:38:32If you're a scientist, name three elements.
00:38:35Oh, well, let's see now. There's... there's gold... ham... and... the tears of a mermaid.
00:38:46Two out of three. Close enough. First on your left.
00:38:49The balloon of my airship contains twenty thousand cubic feet of hydrogen gas.
00:38:56Just as here, you'll notice the open log fire to ensure a comfortable temperature at fire altitude.
00:39:02Oh!
00:39:03Captain... I... Captain... Captain, please.
00:39:06You can't possibly appear on stage without Polly.
00:39:08Patience, Charles. All in good touch.
00:39:11Give it. For it.
00:39:13For it.
00:39:14For it.
00:39:18Just a dick.
00:39:19Oh, but Captain...
00:39:20How on earth?
00:39:26My airship will revolutionize the fields of meteorology and cartography.
00:39:33But mostly, it's for looking down ladies' tops.
00:39:37No.
00:39:45Captain, I really, really think it would be best if I take over from here.
00:39:50There's a certain manner in which these things...
00:39:52Nonsense, Jack.
00:39:53What this science stuff needs is a bit of showmanship.
00:39:56It's the captain.
00:40:14Captain!
00:40:15Captain!
00:40:17Fellow scientists, poindexters, geeks.
00:40:22Prepare to be confounded.
00:40:24Prepari...
00:40:26... per essere assicurati...
00:40:27Prepari...
00:40:28Oh ho...
00:40:29Espere un secondo...
00:40:30Cosa è questo?
00:40:35Cosa è questo?
00:40:41Stop!
00:40:43Sono il mondo migliore dottore...
00:40:46... e ho detto che la scienza che stai facendo...
00:40:49... è troppo assicurante...
00:40:51Dr. Albino...
00:40:52... dici che i pensi che i suoi nervosi...
00:40:54...cippi in modo che i suoi rispondimenti...
00:40:57... di cui i suoi rispondimenti...
00:40:58... che causano i nostri rispondimenti...
00:41:00... di rispondimenti?
00:41:01Oh...
00:41:02...
00:41:04Ah, Ann!
00:41:05Cosa, lovi...
00:41:06... ti sei stato spazzito...
00:41:08... ma questa è la più educazione di avventura...
00:41:11... vero!
00:41:12It's a dodo.
00:41:39An actual dodo!
00:41:56Makes electricity look like a pile of crap!
00:42:06The Royal Society's Prize for Best Scientific Discovery is awarded to...
00:42:15Have you any idea what the sterling doubloon exchange rate is these days?
00:42:19Scientist Captain!
00:42:21Thank you.
00:42:22Thank you.
00:42:23You were too kind.
00:42:24Please stop.
00:42:25Enough.
00:42:26Thank you.
00:42:27Thank you.
00:42:28What is that it?
00:42:33Oh, no.
00:42:34Ah, good.
00:42:35You also get this leather-bound set of encyclopedias.
00:42:43Excuse me, just one moment.
00:42:44Thank you.
00:42:46Okay, Chuck.
00:42:47Now, I like encyclopedias as much as the next man.
00:42:49But they're not exactly going to help me win Pirate of the Year, are they?
00:42:54Where's the booty?
00:42:55Booty?
00:42:56What booty?
00:42:57The prize!
00:42:58The untold riches, remember?
00:43:01Oh.
00:43:02Perhaps I didn't explain.
00:43:04It's not all about money.
00:43:06No.
00:43:07The real prize is...
00:43:09Her old majesty, the Empress of India, ruler of the kingdom of Java, defender of the face...
00:43:13Personal audience...
00:43:14With Queen Victoria...
00:43:15...Herself.
00:43:16With Queen Victoria...
00:43:17...Herself.
00:43:18With Queen Victoria...
00:43:19...Herself.
00:43:20...Herself.
00:43:21Oh.
00:43:23Oh.
00:43:24Oh.
00:43:25Oh.
00:43:27Oh.
00:43:29Oh.
00:43:30Oh.
00:43:31Oh.
00:43:32This is...
00:43:34...Scientist Captain.
00:43:35Congratulations.
00:43:39Grazie a tutti.
00:44:09Grazie a tutti.
00:44:39Grazie a tutti.
00:45:09No, no, no, no, no.
00:45:11Scientist.
00:45:12Good old science.
00:45:14Can't get enough of it.
00:45:15Mixing stuff together, you know.
00:45:16Test tube, tubing, and Bunsen burning.
00:45:18He's no scientist.
00:45:24He's a girl guide.
00:45:28He's no girl guide.
00:45:30He's a pirate.
00:45:35Hang on, hang on.
00:45:36There's been some kind of mistake.
00:45:37Some silly mistake.
00:45:39Whoa, let her stop.
00:45:41Stop.
00:45:41I can explain.
00:45:42Your Majesty.
00:45:59He's hidden, Dodo.
00:46:02If you chop his head off now, they might never find out where.
00:46:05Wait a moment.
00:46:06One doesn't know why.
00:46:20Perhaps it's his luxuriant beard, or his gleaming teeth, or the way he smells faintly of coconuts.
00:46:28But we have taken a shine to this pirate.
00:46:30Do you have a name, pirate captain?
00:46:34They call me a pirate captain.
00:46:37Well, pirate captain, we hereby pardon you of your piratical pride.
00:46:44You will stay in London, pirate captain, and entertain us with your stories and your wit.
00:46:54And especially your dear little Dodo.
00:47:05Hell's barnacles.
00:47:06Can we please get out of here now?
00:47:08That was a bit close for comfort, number two.
00:47:10I will get you the Dodo.
00:47:12Your Majesty.
00:47:13See that you do, Mr. Darwin.
00:47:22Captain?
00:47:23Captain?
00:47:25Captain?
00:47:26Hurry up, lads.
00:47:27Chop, chop.
00:47:28Let's care back to sea where we belong.
00:47:29Wow, Captain!
00:47:30I told you coming to London was a bad idea.
00:47:32The sooner I get, the smell of brine in my...
00:47:34Captain!
00:47:36Captain!
00:47:36Captain!
00:47:39You're not leaving, surely?
00:47:42I most certainly am.
00:47:44You've let me down badly, Charles.
00:47:46Look, look!
00:47:47Also, to be frank, Captain...
00:47:49Your nose is too small for your face.
00:47:50But...
00:47:50You're the toast of London town.
00:47:52Oh, I say, look at that.
00:47:58Ooh...
00:47:59You've already captured my island.
00:48:01We were hoping you might come out for a little...
00:48:03Celebration before you go.
00:48:09We, um...
00:48:10Don't want to miss the tide, Captain.
00:48:12No, no, no, quite right, quite right.
00:48:13Oh, Captain, don't join us, please.
00:48:18I'll just stop for a quick one.
00:48:20Rude to refuse.
00:48:21But it's ham night...
00:48:22I'll be 20 minutes, half an hour tops.
00:48:23Just get her warmed up without me.
00:48:25Aren't we going yet?
00:48:27Shh!
00:48:27But what about winning the Pirate of the Year
00:48:30and showing all those other Captains
00:48:31that he's not a loser?
00:48:41Yoo-hoo!
00:48:42Coming on, Captain!
00:48:43Captain.
00:48:45Thank you.
00:48:46Thank you.
00:48:47Thank you so very much.
00:48:48Captain.
00:48:49And your name is...
00:48:50Very talented, Captain.
00:48:52Rude!
00:48:53Ow!
00:48:57And that, and that is why
00:48:59in a straight fight
00:49:00a shark who would probably
00:49:02beat a Dracula.
00:49:04Jane Austen, feel free to use it
00:49:05in one of your books.
00:49:07Oh, Pirate, Captain.
00:49:08You are a born back on turf.
00:49:10So much better than the last chap
00:49:12we all went doolally over.
00:49:14You four beats.
00:49:15Don't be kind.
00:49:18Oh, do run along.
00:49:20Another drink, Captain?
00:49:22Hmm?
00:49:22Cheers, John.
00:49:24Huh?
00:49:26I say,
00:49:27you're not, uh,
00:49:28related.
00:49:29in some way,
00:49:29are you?
00:49:30Are you?
00:49:31Is it you,
00:49:32sort of?
00:49:33No, no, no, no,
00:49:34nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing.
00:49:35Cheers.
00:49:46You know what I've discovered, Charles?
00:49:48The friends you make
00:49:49after you've become famous
00:49:50are better,
00:49:51truer friends
00:49:52than the ones you've had
00:49:53for years beforehand.
00:49:54and so very wise.
00:49:58But the lads will think
00:50:00I'm a fool.
00:50:00No, a fool.
00:50:02You!
00:50:02Oh, you're an intellectual giant.
00:50:05Uh, yeah,
00:50:06just look at how you've managed
00:50:07to keep Polly safe
00:50:08from those sinister forces.
00:50:10Yes, I did do that, didn't I?
00:50:12You did.
00:50:13And wherever she's hidden,
00:50:15I bet it's somewhere
00:50:17really ingenious.
00:50:18It is, rather.
00:50:21You'll never guess where.
00:50:22Well, no,
00:50:23you're too smart for me,
00:50:25Captain.
00:50:26Right under everyone's noses,
00:50:28or right under my noses in here.
00:50:30Oh, you've been keeping Polly
00:50:38in your beard.
00:50:41Actually,
00:50:42I keep all sorts in here.
00:50:45I'm sorry about this, Captain.
00:50:47About what?
00:50:50What's the monkey man playing?
00:50:53This painily isn't even a real...
00:50:55Come back here, you lovers!
00:51:13Sorry, Reverend.
00:51:18Right away!
00:51:18Oh, yeah!
00:51:19Oh, yeah!
00:51:20Stop!
00:51:25Got you, you roe!
00:51:40Yeah, that's rather nice.
00:51:44Neptune's lips,
00:51:45what are you up to?
00:51:45I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
00:51:46it's not my fault!
00:51:47What do you mean,
00:51:47not your fault?
00:51:48You steal Polly,
00:51:49you shoot my best hat full of holes!
00:51:51Oh!
00:51:55Well, go on, then.
00:52:11Explain yourself.
00:52:14There's this girl.
00:52:16I'm hopelessly smitten with her.
00:52:18Ah, I'm listening.
00:52:19She is quite a girl.
00:52:49Crackers!
00:52:51Biscuits!
00:52:52Mr. Darwin.
00:52:57Honestly, Charles.
00:52:58It's the bun.
00:52:59The bun really does it for me.
00:53:01And I see you've brought a friend.
00:53:04How delightful.
00:53:05I'm sorry, I didn't mean...
00:53:06Oh, get a grip, man.
00:53:08You couldn't manage one tiny task,
00:53:10could you?
00:53:10It's pathetic.
00:53:11It's pathetic.
00:53:11You should have a grip, man.
00:53:38Ecco, Capitano, vedo che ho fatto tutto questo.
00:53:44Hai visto, potrei avere il corpo di una moglie e fiebile,
00:53:50ma ho il corpo e la soul di una persona che davvero, davvero vuole questo dodo.
00:54:08Sì, sembra di ricordare che voi, piratica, sono un po' di un po' di sposti per le cose strane.
00:54:24Oltre a te sei che ci sono un po' di magpie?
00:54:27Non, non, non, Polly...
00:54:31Come ora, Capitano, è così semplice.
00:54:35Polly here could live like a queen at my petting zoo, and you, well, with treasure like this, you could be famed across the Seven Seas.
00:54:53Captain, Polly's not for sale.
00:54:57You win Pirate of the Year? You're a shoe insult. There's not a pirate and the Seven Seas can match you.
00:55:06The Warp Band winning Pirate of the Year and showing all those other captains that you're not a loser.
00:55:12Loser. Loser.
00:55:16I'm a mighty head.
00:55:20So, Captain, are you going to do the right thing?
00:55:27I'm sailing out on the ocean, out on a deep blue sea.
00:55:3720 minutes, he said.
00:55:40Didn't he say 20 minutes?
00:55:42Don't worry, lads. He probably just got caught up, you know, battling a giant squid or something.
00:55:57Well, come on, you lovers!
00:56:01I told you! I told you he wouldn't let us down!
00:56:05Hello, boys.
00:56:07Miss me?
00:56:09I'm having a mirage!
00:56:11But...
00:56:13How?
00:56:14Good question, number two. I stole it all in a daring raid on the Tower of London.
00:56:18You... stole... all this from the Tower of London?
00:56:23That's right. Then I burnt it to the ground, wrestled a pair, oh, and I kissed a princess for good measure.
00:56:29Well, what are you waiting for? Don't just stand there like porpoises! There's a trophy with our names on it!
00:56:34Hehehe!
00:56:36Hehehe!
00:56:37Set a course for Blood Island!
00:56:44Have a blast, me hearties!
00:56:46And welcome to the 59th Annual Horror of the Year Awards!
00:56:51This is the ticket, eh, number two?
00:56:55Oh, please, please, please, please, please!
00:56:56Can't Polly come out now!
00:56:57B-b-bess, best not.
00:56:59She's still very tired.
00:57:01And here is your house for the evening!
00:57:03Shhh!
00:57:04And here is your house for the evening!
00:57:06Shhh!
00:57:07Shhh!
00:57:08Shhh!
00:57:09Shhh!
00:57:10Shhh!
00:57:11Shhh!
00:57:12Shhh!
00:57:13Shhh!
00:57:14Shhh!
00:57:15Shhh!
00:57:16Shhh!
00:57:17Shhh!
00:57:18Shhh!
00:57:19Shhh!
00:57:20Shhh!
00:57:21Shhh!
00:57:22Shhh!
00:57:23Shhh!
00:57:24Shhh!
00:57:25Shhh!
00:57:26Shhh!
00:57:27Shhh!
00:57:28Shhh!
00:57:29Shhh!
00:57:30Shhh!
00:57:31Shhh!
00:57:32Shhh!
00:57:33Shhh!
00:57:34Shhh!
00:57:35Shhh!
00:57:36Shhh!
00:57:37Shhh!
00:57:38Shhh!
00:57:39Shhh!
00:57:40Shhh!
00:57:41Shhh!
00:57:42Shhh!
00:57:43Shhh!
00:57:44Shhh!
00:57:45Shhh!
00:57:46Shhh!
00:57:47Shhh!
00:57:48Shhh!
00:57:49Shhh!
00:57:50Come on, cheer up.
00:57:52All you slobs, this is the big one.
00:57:58The nominees for Pirate of the Year are as follows.
00:58:02Black Bellamy, Cutlass Blues, Big Leg Hastings, and a surprise late entry, the Pirate Captain.
00:58:16The panel of Independent Judges.
00:58:20Appounted each pirate's booty and declared that this year's winner is...
00:58:29The Pirate Captain!
00:58:51The Pirate Captain!
00:58:57The Pirate Captain!
00:59:03Sì, scusate!
00:59:21Sì, scusate!
00:59:25Sì, è tutto molto vero, sono molto spettato, ma...
00:59:29This is most irregular.
00:59:33So is this.
00:59:42It seems Queen Victoria has pardoned the pirate captain.
00:59:52So what if she did?
00:59:53If you've been pardoned, then technically you're no longer a pirate.
00:59:58And if you're no longer a pirate, you really can't be Pirate of the Year.
01:00:04Now can you?
01:00:06Is this true?
01:00:10That's one, frankly, rather negative way of looking at it.
01:00:15Villainous treachery!
01:00:18Treacherous villainy!
01:00:21You have betrayed the pirating fraternity.
01:00:24But Pirate King!
01:00:25Your pirate hat!
01:00:27Uncoat!
01:00:42Your pirate badge with googly eyes.
01:00:46And your World of Hooks discount card.
01:00:49Confuscate his treasure every last bit of it.
01:00:55Begone!
01:00:56May your love's shame bear down upon you.
01:00:59You are hereby vanished from Blood Island.
01:01:04You are a pirate.
01:01:06No more!
01:01:07Yes, well, not a total success.
01:01:26We don't need them.
01:01:28And they're stupid awards.
01:01:29The best thing about being a pirate isn't the treasure.
01:01:33It's the courtlesses.
01:01:34It's Ham Knight!
01:01:35It's Polly!
01:01:36Where is Polly, Captain?
01:01:39What do you mean?
01:01:40You know where she is.
01:01:41She's been upset enough.
01:01:44Captain.
01:01:44I sold her to Queen Victoria for a boatload of treasure.
01:02:01There, I've said it.
01:02:02Well, come on.
01:02:12She was just a parrot.
01:02:14I mean, she wasn't even a parrot.
01:02:16Always weeing on the boat's carpets, biting everyone.
01:02:19She gave half of us tetanus, for goodness sake.
01:02:20But she was our Polly.
01:02:24Yeah, well, you know, you should be happy for her.
01:02:26She'll be living the high life.
01:02:29Eating gold bricks wrapped up in, you know, swans.
01:02:37Well, where are you swabs going?
01:02:39Come on!
01:02:41Well, we'll have an adventure somewhere tropical.
01:02:43With those native ladies whose outfits don't leave much to the imagination.
01:02:46Looks like it's, uh, it's you and me, number two.
01:02:53Good old inseparable you and me.
01:02:55Us two against the world, eh?
01:02:57Eh?
01:02:58Like Serrano Ham and, and, uh, you know, that other kind of ham.
01:03:04Arr.
01:03:07You can't always just say arr at the end of a sentence and think that makes everything all right.
01:03:16Fine!
01:03:27Fine, go on then, go!
01:03:29Go!
01:03:31It's not like I need any of you anyway.
01:03:35See if I care.
01:03:36I'm not crying.
01:03:38It's just been raining.
01:03:41See if I care.
01:03:43On my face.
01:03:47And if you think you see some tear tracks down my cheeks, please, please, please, don't tell my mates.
01:03:58And if I am crying, it's not cause of you, it's because I'm thinking about a friend of mine, and you don't know who is dying.
01:04:09That's right, dying.
01:04:10For these are tears of sadness because you're leaving me.
01:04:11I've just been cutting onions.
01:04:12I'm making a lasagna.
01:04:13For one.
01:04:14One.
01:04:15One.
01:04:16One.
01:04:17One.
01:04:18One.
01:04:19One.
01:04:20One.
01:04:21One.
01:04:22One.
01:04:23One.
01:04:24One.
01:04:25One.
01:04:26One.
01:04:27One.
01:04:28One.
01:04:29One.
01:04:30One.
01:04:31One.
01:04:32One.
01:04:33One.
01:04:34One.
01:04:35A lasagna."
01:04:37One.
01:04:39Oh, I'm not crying.
01:04:41Noooo!
01:04:42I'm not upset because you left me this way.
01:04:44My eyes are just a little sweaty today.
01:04:46They'reстаточно but주민.
01:04:47They've been looking around a lot, searching for you.
01:04:48They've been looking for you.
01:04:49Even though I'm hoping not to.
01:04:50These aren't the tears of sadness, they're tears of joy.
01:04:53I'm just laughing.
01:04:54Oh, I look at art in a live-scaleω pie, Vivian.
01:04:58So I've been looking for...
01:04:59What is the dance class?
01:05:00I'm Demokratie's al pian.
01:05:00This song詞 milieu what's my favorite time.
01:05:01That's the story how the topsדר is no matter.
01:05:02Goldie Pinoam, she's a pop-up?
01:05:03In the contracting age.
01:05:04Ah ah ha ah
01:05:10Ah ah ah
01:05:14Ah ah ah ah
01:05:21Ah ah ah ah
01:05:24Ah ah ah
01:05:26You're too late.
01:05:31She's gone.
01:05:32Charles?
01:05:33Is that you?
01:05:35What are you doing here?
01:05:37We're tramps now.
01:05:38It's not unlike being a scientist,
01:05:40but with less experiments and more drinking your own sweat.
01:05:43But where's Polly?
01:05:45Why isn't she in her cage?
01:05:47Oh, too horrible.
01:05:50Banquet for world leaders?
01:05:52I've been a fool for love.
01:05:54Victoria never wanted Polly for her petting zoo.
01:05:57The queen of tiger? Black rhino raggore? Panda face fritters?
01:06:02I've discovered the queen is a member of a terrible secret dining society.
01:06:07Kings, queens, emperors from around the world,
01:06:10they meet on her flagship, the QV1, to eat
01:06:14the rarest and most endangered creatures they can find.
01:06:18This year, the highlight is...
01:06:22Dodo Alarange?
01:06:25She's gonna eat Polly?
01:06:26It's all my fault.
01:06:27I'm an awful human being, I'll never get a girlfriend.
01:06:32Now put yourself together, man.
01:06:33Ow!
01:06:34Now listen, Charles.
01:06:35We've all done something unforgivable.
01:06:36I've betrayed my pirate honor,
01:06:38you've betrayed science,
01:06:39and Mr. Bobo's betrayed the animal kingdom.
01:06:42We've got to rescue her.
01:06:43Us?
01:06:44Against the crowned heads of the world on an impregnable warship?
01:06:47It's impossible odds!
01:06:48It's only impossible if you stop to think about it.
01:06:51Come on, we didn't evolve from slugs just to sit here drinking our own sweat now, did we?
01:06:54Are you with us, Mr. Bobo?
01:06:58Are you out of your...
01:07:01Oh, I say.
01:07:02Well, Pa!
01:07:03We can do without the monkey man.
01:07:04Sorry, what was that about slugs?
01:07:06No time for that now.
01:07:07Come on!
01:07:08Ready!
01:07:09Said, are you ready to go?
01:07:10Said, are you ready to go?
01:07:11Said, are you ready to go?
01:07:12Prepare to be boarded, nerds!
01:07:13It's true!
01:07:14You can't see that lady's tops!
01:07:15Keep pedaling, Charles!
01:07:16Said, are you ready to go?
01:07:18습 apostolo
01:07:20Said, are you ready to go?
01:07:24Put up, Put up, Put up
01:07:27It's true!
01:07:28You can't see that lady's tops!
01:07:30I said, are you ready to go?
01:07:36Hello?
01:07:37Sì, sì, sì, sì, sì.
01:08:07Sì, sì, sì, sì.
01:08:37Sì, sì, sì, sì, sì.
01:09:07Sì, sì, sì.
01:09:09Sì, sì, sì.
01:09:11Sì, sì, sì.
01:09:13Sì, sì, sì.
01:09:15Sì, sì, sì, sì.
01:09:17Sì, sì, sì.
01:09:18Gastor?
01:09:19Are you there?
01:09:20Oui?
01:09:21Your Majesty.
01:09:22Gastor, I think we're ready.
01:09:24Peptune's teeth.
01:09:25This is not a moment to lose.
01:09:26We've got to fight that gift.
01:09:27But it's hopeless.
01:09:28Where do we even start?
01:09:29That's why I reckon, in a straight fight, a shark would probably beat a Dracula.
01:09:35No.
01:09:36Of course, a Frankenstein versus a jellyfish.
01:09:38Well, that's a different pattern.
01:09:40All clear, Chuck.
01:09:44Chuck?
01:09:45No!
01:09:46It's all right, Charles.
01:09:47I'm coming!
01:09:48Don't worry!
01:09:49Charles!
01:09:50I'm coming!
01:09:51Don't worry!
01:09:52Charles!
01:09:53Ah!
01:09:54Yes!
01:09:55Taylor!
01:09:56What?
01:09:57What?
01:09:58What?
01:09:59For sake, lips!
01:10:00Are you all right, Charles?
01:10:01Hey!
01:10:02New there!
01:10:03What are you doing here?
01:10:04Ah, well, now, excellent question.
01:10:05Your exotic animal should have been delivered to the chef by now.
01:10:07What?
01:10:08What is it?
01:10:09Some sort of duck?
01:10:10Oh!
01:10:11Yes!
01:10:12Yes!
01:10:13That's it!
01:10:14Yes!
01:10:15Oh!
01:10:16What?
01:10:17What?
01:10:18What?
01:10:19What is it?
01:10:20Some sort of duck?
01:10:21Oh!
01:10:22Yes!
01:10:23Yes!
01:10:24That's it!
01:10:25Yes!
01:10:26Oh!
01:10:27What?
01:10:28Hurry up, then.
01:10:29Kitchen's that way.
01:10:30Come on!
01:10:31Come on with you!
01:10:32Come on!
01:10:33Here we go, my pretty.
01:10:38It's time to be...
01:10:42delicious!
01:10:47Mon Dieu!
01:10:48Polly!
01:10:49Come to Daddy!
01:10:50I'm sorry, old girl.
01:10:51I will never, ever leave you again.
01:10:52I promise.
01:10:53I will never leave you.
01:10:54Perhaps we best make a move.
01:10:55Hmm?
01:10:56Oh, yes, yes, yes, of course.
01:10:57Back to the balloon.
01:10:58Gaston!
01:10:59Gaston!
01:11:00Hello?
01:11:01Captain!
01:11:02Hello?
01:11:03Captain!
01:11:04No!
01:11:05Hello, your majesty.
01:11:06The dodo is coming.
01:11:07Tout de suite.
01:11:08This really is wise.
01:11:09Oh!
01:11:10Claudette!
01:11:11What's your name?
01:11:12What's your name, your majesty?
01:11:13I will never leave you again.
01:11:14I promise.
01:11:15I will never leave you again.
01:11:16I promise.
01:11:17I will never leave you again.
01:11:18I promise.
01:11:19I will never leave you again.
01:11:20I will never leave you.
01:11:21Oh!
01:11:22Perhaps we best make a move.
01:11:23Hmm?
01:11:24Oh, yes, yes, yes, of course.
01:11:25Back to the balloon.
01:11:26Gaston!
01:11:27Gaston!
01:11:28Hello?
01:11:29But you know, your majesty, you cannot hurry the cooking.
01:11:33These are very delicate recipe.
01:11:35And the dodo is a very fattening bitch.
01:11:39Perhaps he's not so good for you.
01:11:40And you know the calories?
01:11:41They will go straight to your chubby size.
01:11:43Captain.
01:11:44A minute on the lips is a lifetime on the Zoota law.
01:11:48Well, well.
01:11:49Pirate Captain.
01:11:53Here you are again.
01:11:54And, oh, my.
01:11:56Hi.
01:11:57Is that Mr. Darwin behind those feathers?
01:11:59Hello.
01:12:00Hello.
01:12:01What a delightfully unexpected surprise.
01:12:04You know, I think secretly.
01:12:08I've always loved you, Charles.
01:12:13Gosh.
01:12:15I mean, really?
01:12:17No.
01:12:18Give.
01:12:19Me.
01:12:20My.
01:12:21Dodo.
01:12:22Now, come on, Vicki.
01:12:23Be sensible.
01:12:24It's just you, a tiny queen, against me, a dashing terror of the high seas.
01:12:29Long gone.
01:12:30Oh, dear.
01:12:31Poor defenseless me.
01:12:32What is a girl to do?
01:12:34I'll let her steady on.
01:12:35Now, careful.
01:12:36Do you know why I really hate pirates?
01:12:37Uh, childhood trauma, was it?
01:12:38Bitten by a pirate when you were a baby?
01:12:39Huh?
01:12:40Beard envy?
01:12:41It's because you're out of date.
01:12:42You're dinosaurs.
01:12:43All that romance of the seas.
01:12:49Ah, ha ha!
01:12:50Oh.
01:12:51Oh.
01:12:52Ooh.
01:12:53Oh.
01:12:54Oh.
01:12:55Oh.
01:12:56Oh.
01:12:57Oh.
01:12:58Oh.
01:12:59Oh.
01:13:00Oh.
01:13:01Oh.
01:13:02Oh.
01:13:03Oh, oh.
01:13:04Oh.
01:13:05Oh.
01:13:06Oh.
01:13:07Oh.
01:13:08Oh.
01:13:09Oh, oh.
01:13:12Right, where were we?
01:13:19Look at you, you should be instinct
01:13:22Along with your little friend
01:13:42Pity you can't eat pirates really
01:13:48But you'd probably taste of barnacles
01:13:52Whereas dear little Polly here is going to be absolutely delicious
01:14:03Hey, Mr. Popo
01:14:07Give me back my dinner
01:14:11No, but snooze
01:14:18Sorry Nicky, Dodo is off the menu
01:14:20Stop
01:14:28Stop
01:14:32Stop
01:14:34Stop
01:14:43Stop
01:15:14Stop
01:15:23Listen, number two, I realize I let you down
01:15:30Sorry
01:15:35I let everybody down
01:15:37You know I've uh
01:15:38Well I've done some pretty appalling things in my piratical career
01:15:43Like that time I used babies as squid bait
01:15:47Or that other time I thought it would be okay to let a turtle drive the boat
01:15:51But the thing is
01:15:52I mean what I'm trying to say is
01:15:55You decided to single-handedly take on Queen Victoria's flagship in order to rescue Polly
01:16:01Yes
01:16:02Yes, I'm afraid I did
01:16:03Yes, I'm afraid I did
01:16:06That's terrifically idiotic
01:16:08Yes
01:16:09It's also the reason why me and the lads
01:16:14Well we still think you're the best pirate of the 70s
01:16:19Oh
01:16:20Yes
01:16:21Yes
01:16:22Please
01:16:23Please
01:16:24Please
01:16:26Watch me
01:16:27Hey
01:16:28Please
01:16:29I can't leave
01:16:30You
01:16:31I can't leave
01:16:33Oh
01:16:34Oh
01:16:35Oh
01:16:36Oh
01:16:38Oh
01:16:40Polly!
01:16:53Oh no, you don't.
01:16:55Captain?
01:17:05Kiss your beaky little friend goodbye.
01:17:10That's it Polly, slip, slip.
01:17:29Come on little dodo, bitey bite.
01:17:32The lady's got Polly!
01:17:34Bite it, you stupid bird.
01:17:40Bite it!
01:17:44No!
01:17:47I don't know!
01:17:51Polly!
01:17:52My scissors!
01:17:53Whoa!
01:17:55Whoa!
01:17:56Whoa!
01:18:04Whoa!
01:18:05Whoa!
01:18:06No barbacoli, Sir.
01:18:31Well done, Sir.
01:18:32Wow.
01:18:34Wow.
01:18:36Capitale!
01:18:38Fair play, there, sir.
01:18:40This is our most unexpectedly heartwarming adventure ever.
01:18:48You will swing for this, Curse.
01:18:50And after you've done swinging, I'll chop your head off.
01:18:54I'll come in the town and fire it into the sun.
01:18:56Does that mean he's not pardoned anymore?
01:19:00Pardoned!
01:19:02You'll be outlawed across the globe
01:19:06There'll be a higher price on your head than anybody before you
01:19:11The whole world will know your name
01:19:15Welcome back, Captain
01:19:32You can get it if you really want
01:19:56You can get it if you really want
01:19:59Well, it's been a pleasure, Charles. Good luck with the science.
01:20:05Thank you, Captain.
01:20:06Oh, and just a little tip. Grow yourself a beard. It'll make your face look less lumpy.
01:20:11A hundred thousand doubloons.
01:20:34Not bad, eh, Mr. Bobo?
01:20:39You can get it if you really want
01:20:41Try and try and try
01:20:45That's... I, uh... Is this a bit of squid's tentacle?
01:20:58Yeah, and that's my earwax.
01:21:03I keep telling you it's never been about the trophies or the treasure.
01:21:07It's about who you are inside.
01:21:12I say, you know, not a woman disguised as a man, are you, number two?
01:21:16No.
01:21:17Because that does happen surprisingly often at sea.
01:21:19But the heart of the battle of sea
01:21:22Into the sweeter the victory comes
01:21:26You can get it if you really want
01:21:30You can get it if you really want
01:21:34You can get it if you really want
01:21:37But you must die
01:21:38Well, come on, you coves.
01:21:41Those treasure chests won't plunder themselves.
01:21:43Hoist the flag!
01:21:44I am champions!
01:21:46Here's a course for adventure!
01:21:49Yeah!
01:22:10You see? I told you. Didn't I tell you?
01:22:13Just add it on for decoration, my foot.
01:22:15Brrrrrr!
01:22:18We are young
01:22:23We run green
01:22:25Keep our teeth
01:22:26Nice and clean
01:22:28See our friends
01:22:30See the sights
01:22:31Feel alright
01:22:33We wake up
01:22:36We go out
01:22:37Smoke and play
01:22:39Put it out
01:22:41See our friends
01:22:43See the sights
01:22:44Grazie a tutti
01:23:14Grazie a tutti
01:23:44Grazie a tutti
01:24:14Grazie a tutti
01:24:44Grazie a tutti
01:25:14Grazie a tutti
01:25:44Grazie a tutti
01:26:14Grazie a tutti
01:26:44Grazie a tutti
01:27:14Grazie a tutti
01:27:44Grazie a tutti
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