00:00Last year you spoke publicly for the first time since Dave's death during your commencement
00:04address at UC Berkeley.
00:06And I think these were the lines that caused that speech to go viral.
00:09You said, Dave's death changed me in very profound ways.
00:13I learned about the depths of sadness and the brutality of loss, which that word struck
00:19me, the brutality of loss.
00:22But I also learned that when life sucks you under, you can kick against the bottom, break
00:27the surface and breathe again.
00:31So how are you learning to breathe again?
00:36I'm learning to let the grief come when it comes.
00:39It was very good advice.
00:41My rabbi told me to lean into the suck.
00:43Lean into the suck.
00:44Not what I meant when I said lean in.
00:46You miss lean in.
00:48Miss lean in for our times.
00:49Lean into the suck.
00:50Which was actually really good advice because I think for me and a lot of people, when we
00:54get upset, we're kind of upset, we're upset.
00:57I get sad, and then I'm sad, I'm sad.
00:59Yeah, that's called secondary.
01:00I call it the second derivative.
01:01Yeah, secondary.
01:02I get angry, and then I'm angry, I'm angry.
01:04I get nervous, then I'm nervous, I'm nervous, and so it just piles on.
01:07And when he just told me, lean into the suck, this is going to suck, it really helped me
01:13be like, settle into the feelings.
01:15And then they kind of, they were more gentle or they passed more quickly.
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