00:00wait I think you have low battery are you sure I was the type of girl that
00:10people considered fake inauthentic unoriginal not unique it was hard being
00:15me none of this is whatsoever it all started when I was a child I was a young
00:20girl with a typical typical obsession ponies and Barbie dolls that I made have
00:25sex all the time that's not what was true hi my room walls painted a frosting
00:31pink lies and had posters of unicorns and rainbows lies also it was a place I
00:36could get away to a place to forget all of my problems it was hard having
00:40problems at that age unlike all of my friends and classmates I had the
00:43hardest problems of all wow go fuck yourself in first grade I had my first
00:48crush on a boy his name was Jacob Hollins there was no such person as Jacob Hollins
00:53I can tell you that right now I used to stuff my bra in first grade I shouldn't
01:01have been wearing a bra on the first place and but I was willing to kill for
01:06this boy one day I was in luck I was paired up for a project with Jacob who
01:14didn't exist on about the third or fourth day that we worked together he stopped
01:18writing and just stared at me can we go outside on your swing at this point I
01:22looked up at him put down my pencil and nodded he took my small hand and he went
01:27outside I had a turn on the swing first he pushed me lightly and I laughed I
01:31actually laughed I had my first kiss that night wrong well I guess I'll see you
01:37tomorrow I had a lot of fun with you today said Jacob as he smiled at me a few of
01:41his teeth were missing and it made me just want him more
01:44like oh my god um me and Jacob didn't talk much after that night he ended up
01:53going out with the prettier more popular girl so I ended up going back to my old
01:57way of living sitting in my pink room with my ponies and Barbie dolls I officially
02:03became fake in fifth grade I had moved cities and wanted to fit in I never moved
02:09cities ever I was living in Los Angeles now and had had to learn to be plastic I
02:16still had all of my bruises and my broken heart now unfixable I started
02:20buying clothes from limited to and wearing sparkling sequin belts and headbands
02:25again there was another boy that I really really liked his name was Jordan
02:28Michaels sometime in April I was going to be in a play with Jordan and his group of
02:32friends we were just going to be acting out the famous Shakespeare play Romeo and
02:36Juliet and I think this is original we rehearsed for the next few weeks and
02:40finally got to the day where we would rehearse the kissing scene I knew this is
02:43it my second childhood kiss I leaned closer and closer to him until my hair
02:48hung in his face and just before our lips touched one of Jordan's closest
02:52friends hopped up on stage and pushed me he pushed me I fell off the stage and
02:55landed on my neck this is my first concussion my teachers drove me to the ER and I
03:04had to get surgery ASAC I never spoke to Jordan or any of his friends again and I
03:10had moved again to a small town called Ojai my school was called Matilaha
03:13junior high and I had a feeling I would like it that's probably like the one
03:17truth yeah no except I had lived in Ojai this entire time well yeah I had a
03:23ton of acne and disastrous makeup job that's very true I finally had some
03:28friends too one was my best friend Kirsten and the other one was Emily they
03:35were all I had I did everything with them and life was still a crack hole oh my
03:43god and I'm not even gonna read that part about four weeks into the school year a
03:46girl named Lisa sent me a message on myspace.com threatening me this is a true
03:52story except her name isn't Lisa Delaney sent me a message on myspace.com
03:57threatening me by the way Delaney I forgive you I tried to wink just now and
04:01I couldn't do it in late October Kirsten and I went emo that's literally word for
04:11word November one of my least favorite months of the year and in the November
04:15of 2006 I had my first period I was so excited at first I could now say that I
04:24was a woman the only thing that I later learned wasn't true was that you don't
04:29get big boobs right away yeah girl you didn't get them until you're 20 in March
04:34I had gotten my first boyfriend ever and sadly he lived in Thousand Oaks oh my god
04:38this is such a sad story wait is this part real yeah my choir class was going on a
04:43trip to the local Six Flags Magic Mountain theme park but before that we had
04:47gone to another school to participate in a singing competition this is where I met
04:51Jason or saw him he had blonde bangs in his face and he wore a rebellious spike
04:56belt a bunch of my friends and I gathered together and swapped Jason's
05:02number with each other I don't know how anyone got it but apparently someone did
05:05hi is Jason there I asked and I picked up the phone yeah who is this answered the
05:09person on the other line oh this is one of the girls from the Matilla Haw choir and
05:13you gave me your number the next morning which is a Saturday Jason called me at
05:19seven o'clock in the morning hey hello I asked I said quietly I'm still
05:24asleep sorry if I woke you up this is Jason I was just wondering if you would go
05:27out with me yes I finally yelled into the phone he was startled by this I can
05:31tell and I immediately regretted yelling into the fog things things went well for
05:36about a week and then I but then I found out that he was a complete sex
05:40maniac and then he wasn't a good kid it's because he asked me if we could kiss
05:47Lena what the fuck I'm fucking acting like this 13 year old kid is a fucking nympho
05:54oh my god um so I broke up with him and went back to my normal life
06:00I also began to get myspace famous hi I had so many friends that I couldn't
06:06even count them wow wrong I was so well known for my hair and my makeup that
06:13people on the streets asked me oh my god I told you are you from myspace
06:20wow so uh that was interesting oh all right I love you guys and I hope you
06:26enjoy my literally scary 13 year old self yeah okay I love you guys see you
06:34later bye
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