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Welcome to Tues Your Own Adventure! Join Jules and James as they take a look at video games that should have been movies! From home cinema to the silver screen. #TuesYourOwnAdventure
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00:00Hello all of you little demons, Jules here for WhatCulture.com, back again with another
00:04episode of the awesomely named and awfully hosted Choose Your Own Adventure, the weekly
00:09medieval themed format where I, the crowned Jules of WhatCulture.com, take a list chosen
00:13by you, yes you the person who is, just looking so goddamn beautiful today that I had to stop
00:18this video and mention it.
00:20Ah, you look good mate.
00:22Yes, you get to decide what list I dole out to you each and every week, and this week
00:26we have none other to thank than Easy Logic for their suggestion of video games that play
00:34kinda like movies.
00:36Now, obviously I've done my usual YouTube twist-a-roo on the subject, and I've come up with a good
00:41idea of video games that should have been movies, because after all, with the Sonic 2 movie that's
00:47doing the rounds at the moment, what better time is there to celebrate the beautiful marriage
00:50between video games and cinema?
00:53Oh god, they're about to intersect.
00:54James, cut away.
00:55We can't show this.
00:55Because as video game budgets balloon to almost Mr. Creosote levels in the current day
01:00and age, so too do their ambitions.
01:03As time has moved on, many a video game has mined deep into the realm of the cinematic,
01:07in the hopes of being seen as art alongside their silver screen counterpart.
01:12But with so many video games taking a step forward towards this cinematic approach, there
01:16comes a point where you have to throw your hands up in the air and say, well why weren't
01:19you just a bloody film?
01:21So let's take a look at them.
01:21As I'm Jules, this is WhatCulture.com, and these are eight video games that should have
01:25been films.
01:27And before anyone says anything about my thoughts on these games, maybe inferring that these
01:30games are bad, I'm not saying that at all.
01:32I'm just saying that maybe the medium could have been different and could have been better
01:35for the game and the franchise overall.
01:37But you know what?
01:37Let's get on with this list.
01:39You know the drill by now.
01:39Say hi to me here in the live chat.
01:41And let's get on with it.
01:42Number 8, L.A. Noire.
01:44With Team Bondi sinking a sizable portion of their budget into their facial capture technology,
01:50which would allow players to see the lie, a lot was riding on L.A. Noire.
01:55A lot of pressure was on them to deliver the crime-capered goods.
01:58And in that one area, that one facial recognition area, they definitely succeeded.
02:03But the rest of the game?
02:07Because while looking for facial ticks and sweaty brows was a novel and interesting feature,
02:12the rest of the title did feel like it was dragging a heavy load to keep pace,
02:16as the gunfights often felt clunky and the very world around you felt empty and devoid
02:20of anything truly interesting to do.
02:22This is an almighty shame, because the tale on show here really is one for the ages,
02:27and one that fits perfectly with the noir film genre.
02:30It's got everything.
02:31Corrupt cops, scandals, murders, and of course, betrayal, and a very depressing, dour ending.
02:38But unfortunately, all of that was set to the backdrop of driving 50 miles an hour,
02:42around Cardbox City.
02:43Ooh, Delali, I love this.
02:45This is great.
02:46Mmm, great fun.
02:48I mean, come on, guys.
02:49You actually hired actors for this game and then painstakingly digitized them,
02:52so why not use the exact same cast and shoot a big-budget movie instead?
02:57And likely, you wouldn't have had a massive fallout with Rockstar
02:59and had to deal with their crunch culture.
03:01So yeah, making L.A. Noire into a film probably would have been better for everyone involved.
03:05Number seven, F-Zero Climax.
03:08So I know what you're thinking to yourself by now, James,
03:11that why the hell would you choose F-Zero Climax to turn into a movie?
03:15Surely this game's story is about as deep as space cars go zoom zoom, right?
03:19Well, wrong, James, you idiot.
03:22I'm sick and tired of you trying to interrupt me on these things.
03:24I'm sick and tired of it.
03:25Jazz, don't even try and get involved.
03:26I'm sorry, Jazz.
03:27I apologise, James.
03:28That was a bit out of line.
03:29But yes, the point still stands that, Jules, you're an idiot.
03:32Why are you talking about this game, you small-eyed toad?
03:34Well, the joke is on you, my friend, because actually my eyes are normal-sized,
03:38it's just that my head is absolutely massive.
03:40I mean, look at it.
03:41And secondly, because deep within this pixelated handheld game
03:44is a story worth telling on the big screen.
03:47Plus, I mean, let's face it, F-Zero Climax is the weakest game in this franchise,
03:51but only because of the fact that every other entry into the franchise is an absolute banger,
03:55and plus plus because the world needs more F-Zero.
03:59So come on, give me this.
04:00So the story in question centres on a brand new cast of characters,
04:03one of which is Rick Wheeler, who admittedly debuted in the prior GB game,
04:08but truly takes centre stage here as he dons the mantle of the new Captain Falcon.
04:13This moment could provide the entire drive of the movie,
04:16seeing Rick grow up watching the original Captain as a kid,
04:19mastering racing himself, and then finally continuing on the Captain's legacy.
04:23Plus, plus, plus, tell me that I'm wrong here,
04:26if this took any notes out of the absolutely almighty masterclass film that is Redline,
04:32then you would have an animated film that would do absolute gangbusters,
04:35look utterly amazing, and feel as fast as it did on the silver screen
04:40as it does on your little handheld game device.
04:43Number six, Afro Samurai 2 Revenge of Kuma.
04:46Ah, this game, eh?
04:48What a f***ing disaster piece.
04:50So, for those of you not in the know,
04:52and quite possibly for those now looking for a copy of this game,
04:54seeing as the IP that it's based on is quite literally the coolest thing going,
04:59Afro Samurai 2 Revenge of Kuma was a title so unanimously hated by critics and fans
05:04that the devs out and out apologised for its existence
05:06before then deleting digital copies of it from every single storefront possible.
05:11Yes, it was that bad.
05:12And yes, I have played it.
05:14However, what truly sucked about the entire experience
05:17was that there was actually a brilliant story here,
05:20yet was just one so covered in total and utter h***.
05:23The narrative picks up after the first season,
05:26with Kuma seeking revenge against Afro.
05:29His hatred for the titular character stems from the fact that Afro killed the pair's master
05:33in order to take the number two headband from him
05:35in order to challenge the number one and avenge his father.
05:38This tale of revenge fits beautifully next to the wider,
05:41cyclical nature of violence that Afro finds himself in,
05:45and to have to murder his childhood friend not once but twice
05:48is one that would make for a tragic and emotional tale in equal measure.
05:51As a film sitting alongside the other animated media in the franchise,
05:55it would have allowed fans another opportunity to delve into the cyber Wild West style of this IP.
06:01Instead, we just got a lukewarm dollop of nothingness slammed on a plate
06:04that tasted like what could have been.
06:07Number five, Mega Man Legends.
06:10Now, I won't lie to you here,
06:12the only reason that I'm really putting Mega Man Legends on this list
06:15is because of the fact that I want more people to know that Mega Man Legends exists
06:18because it is a game that makes me say...
06:21Hoo boy!
06:22Unironically.
06:23It was a real break from the Mega Man formula,
06:25came with a beautiful new coat of paint,
06:27and tried to push forward in new and innovative ways.
06:31So, of course, it died a commercial death.
06:34Oh, the two thumbs right up there with Drake of the 99 Dragons.
06:38And I did not need to think about Drake and the 99 Dragons.
06:42And for many, this was the sledgehammer that broke the camel's back,
06:45meaning that they never truly got to immerse themselves into this charming world.
06:49Now, as a film, this would obviously remedy this key issue,
06:52while also allowing us more time to get to know the wonderful cast of villains
06:55in the form of the Bond family,
06:56and allow for kid-friendly action to play out on the big screen,
06:59which you just know that fans would eat up.
07:02And here's the big twist of this list,
07:04the evil finger temple of doom, as it were.
07:07I'm not saying that these games here should just be turned into films
07:10and never be made into video games,
07:11because what would happen here in this alternate reality
07:14is that Mega Man Legends, the film, would go on to massive critical acclaim,
07:18and then you'd make a video game about it,
07:21and people would be ready for the dynamic switching gameplay.
07:24And thus, it would sell gangbusters.
07:26That's right, Jules.
07:26I've saved the industry once more.
07:28Huzzah!
07:28And now I fly away.
07:30Whee!
07:31Number four, anything by David Cage.
07:34Okay, so let's be honest here.
07:35David Cage is a man who is clearly just trapped in the wrong industry,
07:39because whatever project that he puts out always seems to come with the underlying message of
07:43please, for the love of God, let me make a film.
07:46I say this because all of his projects possess a cinematic focus,
07:49which often comes at the detriment of any actual gameplay.
07:52I mean, think about it.
07:53At most, in titles like Heavy Rain or Beyond Two Souls,
07:56all you really do is move a character from one space to another,
07:59and any action within is presented in QTE form.
08:02It's just a series of decisions,
08:04taking you from one admittedly beautifully created set piece to another,
08:07and when the term plays like a movie is often thrown about with these projects,
08:11that is a clear sign that maybe somebody should just give him an actual camera
08:15and crew to work with.
08:16Now, this isn't to slight the games in question,
08:18but you have to admit that the air quotes gameplay of these titles is so minimal
08:22and sometimes feels so tacked on that it can sometimes take away from the stories being told,
08:27especially when they're used to pad out the runtime.
08:30I mean, is there any wonder that the terms full movie are amongst the highest searched things
08:34when it comes to his project?
08:35People just want to see what it is, and that is a movie.
08:38Number three, Death Stranding.
08:40Okay, okay, okay, so hear me out on this one.
08:42I actually quite like what Death Stranding is,
08:45and what Hideo Kojima was trying to do with this project,
08:48but I definitely think that this should be a film,
08:51because it would mean that he would have to tell a f***ing story more concisely.
08:55I mean, come on, did we really need a two-hour cutscene at the end of the game?
09:00That is a literal movie in itself, and the repetitive missions in the third act
09:04really did feel like things were being phoned in somewhat.
09:06So what about we take this massive whale, cut out all the blubber and fashion a two,
09:12maybe three-hour movie, but that's it, Hideo, you go on any longer and we're coming after you,
09:16and use all of the wonderful characters and the rich world that's being created
09:19to tell a more focused tale.
09:21And all the pieces are there as well.
09:23A man looking to rebuild humanity, an ever-present threat of very explosive death,
09:28and giant BTs that could make for entrancing set pieces.
09:31Chuck in your baby buddy cop pal and you've got a movie with heart,
09:35danger, and also wouldn't overstay its welcome by about 10 hours.
09:40Number 2. Lost Odyssey
09:41So, after completing Lost Odyssey on the Xbox 360,
09:45I sat back and exhaled deeply before commenting,
09:48Ah, well that was the most fun I've ever had with such a boring game.
09:52And you know what, that is true, because at its core,
09:54Lost Odyssey has a great story to tell, but does so in the most padded and bland way possible.
09:59With endless reams of dialogue repeating the same story points over and over,
10:04plus enough filler to make some Naruto arcs feel concise,
10:07Lost Odyssey dragged itself out for at least 10 hours more than it should have.
10:11Now I get that JRPGs are usually a long-form storytelling format,
10:14but there were so many moments where you could just feel that all the gameplay department had to work on
10:19from the writing team was Apathetic Shrug for Two Hours,
10:23that was written on a post-it note.
10:24The combat system might have been nicely conceived,
10:27but it was relied upon too much,
10:29to the point where battling felt like a chore come the end of the game.
10:33Now on the big screen, this tale of amnesiac,
10:35immortal heroes of corrupted civilisations and of course mighty monsters probably would have done
10:41pretty well, but on the 360 all it really felt like was,
10:45we've got Final Fantasy at home.
10:47Big bang of energy like that.
10:49Nobody wants that.
10:50And number one, We Happy Few.
10:52Now before I tear this game apart,
10:54I do have to concede the fact that a lot of tweaks and patches
10:57and the expansive DLC that was added to this game post-launch
11:00have made We Happy Few into a very enjoyable world to explore,
11:04but when it came to its launch,
11:06there was only one word to describe this game,
11:08and that was disappointing.
11:12The disconnect between the outstanding setting of a pilled up swinging 60s Britain
11:16clashed incredibly hard with the tried, tested and let's face it,
11:20boring survival and stealth driving mechanics,
11:23which is such a shame because the lead in marketing for this game
11:26had me falling in love with the style and eerie tones.
11:29It was like the big book of Bioshock being read to me by a cockney.
11:33Alright gouverneur, let me tell you about Rapture.
11:36There's also a great story at play here too,
11:38with our hero Arthur trying to find out what happened to his brother
11:41and indeed the world around him,
11:43and the flashes between what those see on the drug Joy versus their reality
11:47could have been used to great effect in a film,
11:49as it was one of the few factors that really worked in the game.
11:52It's just a shame then that the actual gameplay of We Happy Few
11:55just sapped the very Joy out of the experience,
11:58and it was so janky in places that many didn't even finish it.
12:02So yeah, this definitely should be a film,
12:04because there is a great story to tell here.
12:07And there we go my friends,
12:08those were 8 video games that should have been movies.
12:10I hope that you enjoyed that,
12:12and please let me know what you thought about it down in the comments section below,
12:14as well as your suggestions for next week's episode,
12:17as I would love to hear from you all.
12:19But if you want to chat to me in the meantime,
12:20you can go over to Twitter and type in at RetroJ,
12:23but the O is a zero,
12:25and you'll find your lovely egg daddy over here.
12:28Or you can swing by Liv and Let's Dice,
12:31there's me spelling it out again, completely wrong,
12:33where I do all of my board game content.
12:34But before I go, I just want to say one thing.
12:36I hope that you are treating yourself well, my friend,
12:39because much like the movies, Alien Ant Farm reference,
12:42you are the true star of the show here,
12:44and you deserve love, happiness, and success.
12:47This is not a tragedy, my friend.
12:49This is going to be a happy ending for everyone involved,
12:52because you are a big ledge,
12:54and you deserve all the good things in life.
12:55Don't let anything or anyone else tell you otherwise, all right?
12:58Go out there and smash your life goals today,
13:00because I believe in you,
13:01and you need to believe in yourself as well.
13:03As always, I've been Jules.
13:04You have been awesome.
13:05Massive love, as always, to James Dowse for his editing work,
13:08and we'll see you soon, my friends.
13:10Peace.
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