Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Season 8 Episode 01- The Good Ones
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00:01Hey, you guys got a sec?
00:02I need to talk to you about something.
00:03Whatever it is can await, Rosie.
00:04You're going to want to see this question.
00:06What is the number one problem with the coronavirus?
00:08Mass death, economic collapse,
00:10the way the disease is exposed to systemic injustice
00:12at the core of American life.
00:13Well, yes, obviously those.
00:15But after that, it's how to high-five your friends
00:17while staying six feet apart.
00:19But now the world can stop their worrying
00:21because we have created the COVID-5.
00:23With this machine, you can execute
00:25any high-five your heart desires.
00:27There's the classic.
00:28Slip me some skin.
00:29Sprinkle me, sprinkle me, sprinkle, sprinkle me, sprinkle.
00:33The Vulcan scissor.
00:35That's a bad one.
00:36Yeah.
00:37And of course, the need for speed.
00:39Woo!
00:40Wow, that was impressively stupid.
00:42I know, right?
00:43So what was it you wanted to tell me?
00:44Just wanted to say goodbye.
00:46I turned in my resignation.
00:47I quit the force.
00:48Wackle!
00:49Ow!
00:50Ah!
00:55Dude, that was by far the best five.
00:57You're quitting?
00:58You're quitting?!
00:59Dude.
01:00I'm getting excited!
01:01We're doing
01:26vaccinated you've returned cheers cheers not exactly an emotional welcome back are you crying
01:32oh he just always knows exactly what to say she's consistent so guys tell me everything that
01:38happened while i was gone well as you know hitchcock retired the very first second he could
01:42that's right i couldn't wait to get out of there why are you always with us on facetime because i
01:46miss scully he's more present than when he worked here spent a terrible year true but you know what
01:51was rougher the hundreds of years of oppression experienced by black people in this country
01:55oppression they still experience to this day why does charles sound like a podcast oh because i'm
01:59listening to one right now it's called two wrongs makes a white lessons in anti-racism yeah you're
02:04lucky you weren't here on june team what the hell you went full schumer cultural appropriation amy
02:12she'll figure it out you're the one who did it so where's rosa thought she'd be here by now i'm
02:16telling you she's not coming ever since she quit the force she thinks we're just part of the problem
02:20she never said that she quit after george floyd was killed because she thought that she could do more
02:24good by becoming a pi that helps victims of police brutality that has nothing to do with us
02:29then how come we haven't hung out at all since she quit setting up a new business takes time she's
02:33probably too busy to see friends and yet i have time to see my friends and be a father and do my job
02:38and straight up crush it at goat simulator on my switch that's not something to be proud of being a
02:42father's not something to be proud of ams wow you've changed dude look all i'm saying is i promise
02:47you she is not gonna show up tonight and if she does i'll give each of you a thousand dollars cash that's a
02:51promise hey everybody jake's word is not legally binding any promise of cash reward is of course
02:55understood as a hyperbole rosa i knew you'd make it
02:57what's up my guy what sorry it's been a while i forgot how we used to greet each other anyway
03:05how's the cool new pi gig going it's not that cool i have a desk at a we work that i share with
03:09a twitter comedian oh fun but i'm getting more clients i just got a new job this morning a woman
03:13was assaulted by two police officers in the 7-4 oh well that's horrible wait the 7-4 i know the
03:19captain there she was my sergeant before i transferred to the 9-9 i could talk to her
03:22she can help nah i doubt that you know the system can still work sometimes when good people are
03:26involved is that why you want to help so you can make some point about policing no i'm not some point
03:31maker shot taker making girls hot like oats but quaker hey man you're wrapping yeah i had to see
03:35where it was going look i just want to help out plus it might be fun to work together again i miss
03:40seeing you okay i'm meeting my client tomorrow i'll text you the details yes jake and rosa are back
03:46you okay your leg shake is rattling the windows out there i'm stressed it's captain holt you won't
03:55believe what he said to me hello santiago how's your lunch pretty bad right that he politely asked
04:02you about your lunch it was small talk captain holt always says that true friends sit in silence
04:06small talk is for strangers and con men so i'm a stranger now this is my big fear about having a
04:13child losing my spark with my boss amy he's your captain you act like it's some romantic
04:18relationship you know what terry you're right it is like a romantic relationship that's what
04:24you got from what i said do you still have that relationship book from when you and sharon are
04:27having issues that book was about sex and it's actually scully's but i bet scully also ordered
04:32some relationship books when scully got himself that sex book for scully just own the sex book thing
04:38my help or not fine can you please get scully's relationship book that is obviously not yours
04:44weird that you're asking me to do it but okay i'll see what i can do hey my client's in the conference
04:50room but before we go in there it wasn't easy getting her to agree to talk with a cop so don't
04:54be too coppish just be normal got it normal not too coppish won't be a problem hello yeah this is not
05:02gonna work sorry you just gave me too many notes i got my head let me start over please miss
05:05fulton hello i'm detective peralta i know you're nervous about talking to a cop which i totally get
05:09but rest assured i'm one of the good ones and i know how that sounds but i'm not one of the bad
05:14ones who says they're one of the good ones i'm actually one of the good ones who says they're
05:17one of the good ones and i know how that sounds does he just keep going until someone stops him yes
05:21would you mind telling us what happened from the beginning sure i was walking home from the pharmacy
05:26when two uniformed cops stopped me and asked me what was in my bag i said nothing just some personal
05:30items but then they kept bothering me saying well if it's nothing i should have no problem with showing
05:34them but in my mind i'm like why do i need to show them my new loofah you don't it's your loofah
05:38thank you miss dears it is my loofah anyways i said i want to go home so i tried to walk past them
05:45and they grabbed me suddenly i'm thrown on the ground they're yelling at me to stop resisting which
05:49i wasn't i was just scared then they threw me up against the squad car saying they was arresting me
05:55for assorting them i'm the one who got the black eye and bruise all over my body but somehow
05:59i assorted them do you remember what time of day it was 5 45 6 o'clock so right at the end of a shift
06:05which means some officers like to make arrests at the end of their shifts so they can work later
06:08and get extra overtime that is so wrong it is but i promise you we are going to get you justice
06:14yeah we'll see
06:16hey did you find the book scully's book wow someone's in the mood i went to my barbershop to get a quick
06:24clean up and boil was there yeah got a low drop fade with a crisp lining i'm all about supporting
06:30black businesses right oh are you upset about something lieutenant it's just that the barbershop
06:35is my therapy it's where i go to clear my mind and that's hard to do with you there
06:40stop me it's my listening noise listening doesn't require noise so i reviewed the aisha fulton case and
06:50it is definitely problematic the arresting officers have had several complaints before
06:54and their version of events is only two sentences long suspect had suspicious item scary it's clearly
07:00bogus but an officer did break one of his fingers probably from tackling her to the ground yeah or
07:05from pointing it so hard at everyone but himself
07:07who are you performing this for jake both of you guys look i want to help but the problem is we
07:16have no proof of what really happened let me guess their body cam footage was mysteriously corrupted
07:20yeah they probably tampered with it but between us there was a rookie there janice lee if you can
07:26get her to confirm your client's story i can help you here's your address great see rosa this
07:33couldn't be any easier franco sullivan head of the patrolman's union and there is no way on god's
07:38green earth that you're ever talking to anyone involved in this case i mean i guess it could be a
07:45little easier why are you here oh sullivan officer lee called me and i'm here to stop your heartless
07:52crusade against our heroes in blue but to be clear all i want is to keep our city safe and then to go
07:58home to my ma at night you live with your mom my mom lives with me in her house do you have
08:03something against my ma because i'll be honest with you there's only three things that i love in this
08:08whole world my ma the nypd and billy joel right now you're assaulting two of those three things wow
08:15so billy joel made your top three and now you've assaulted all three can we please just talk to
08:19officer lee look these are nice boys that you're going after all the perp had to do was show them what
08:25was in the bag but no no she had to escalate things a finger was broken do you understand
08:30that if anyone else was being treated the way our brave officers are being treated they'd be
08:35marching in the street which i would oppose by the way because marching leads to rioting and
08:40rioting leads to look okay this doesn't seem like it's going to be a short rant yeah we're going to
08:43head out hello captain it's so good to see you so so good what's with a bizarre eye contact in the
08:53weird way you're talking santiago did you join a cult what no are you sure most cult members don't
08:59realize they're part of a cult i'm not in a cult i was trying to connect with you it's a method from
09:05this book oh is that one of terry's sex books you mean one of scully's sex books
09:08ever since i came back you've been acting distant what happened to ramey ramey rain amy ramey that's
09:17what people call us i don't know a single person has ever called us that regardless something is very
09:21wrong between us you made small talk with me yesterday oh you noticed that of course i did
09:28it was like a knife to my heart which is why we have to do the exercises in this book please sir
09:33please if i agree will you go back to work absolutely fine what's the next exercise it is
09:39way too sexual wow we're gonna have to skip around a bit to make this appropriate for work
09:45something seemed off to me in o'sullivan's rant how red he got
09:49and he looked like a candied apple with a widow's peak no he said all the perp needed to do was show
09:53them what was in her bag but that wasn't in the police report and lamazar didn't know that so how
09:57did he i think o'sullivan watched the body cam recording before it was corrupted which means he
10:02might have the original footage which means if we want proof we need to break into the union and get
10:05it that's a lot of ifs and besides we can't break into the union they'd recognize us no way just put on
10:09a big dumb watch some oakley's and a camo baseball cap you'll fit right in okay look as much as i would
10:14love to take on the character of mitchell keith erickson from toms river new jersey i can't do
10:19it why not you already named him he named himself but i don't have a warrant and you could be arrested
10:22for breaking and entering no i think we should knock on doors and try and find a witness to corroborate
10:26the story you sure about that have you talked to the people of new york lately yes i know what you
10:30think and obviously things are a bit tense but i believe that people still understand that we're here
10:34to help nope yeah i saw something it looked kind of like this i don't talk to pigs copy that
10:42hey charles i just got a random venmo payment from you was this an accident no it was the only way i
10:49could express how sorry i am for what you have had to go through consider it a mini reparation many
10:54i wouldn't say ten thousand dollars is many ten thousand dollars yeah when i saw that you sent it i
10:59was like this must have been an accident like you meant to send a hundred dollars and then thought
11:03you needed to add the sense two and then accidentally added to zero that's a pretty good guess as to
11:07what could have happened but didn't because i meant every last zero i'm sure you did thanks charles you
11:16got it wow charles that was so nice there's obviously a mistake how many more of these are
11:23gonna do till you realize it's pointless well i don't think it's pointless that's what i've been
11:27trying to prove to you wait i thought you said you weren't trying to prove a point well yeah but
11:32i mean i kind of had to say that so you let me work with you and i could make my point see this
11:36is why we don't hang out anymore because you're always so defensive well it's kind of hard not to
11:39be when you think i'm a bad person now i never said that you didn't have to rosa we came up together
11:44we went to the academy together we've had the exact same career all we ever wanted was to be detectives
11:50and yes we've always known there were problems but we would solve them together from the inside
11:54so when you quit yeah it made me feel like you thought i was wrong for staying jake
11:58my choice has nothing to do with you it was the hardest thing i've ever done i gave up my career
12:04my friends my whole life but i did it because i couldn't ignore what i was a part of anymore
12:09couldn't ignore what the police are doing in my community to people who look like me i know but
12:15not all of them not me this isn't about you and this case where a black woman was assaulted by the
12:21police has nothing to do with you either so if you're not here to help if you're just here to prove a
12:26point then man i don't think we should work together anymore and i definitely don't think
12:31we're friends
12:31scully i need your help but you can't tell anybody what i'm up to oh not a problem i don't talk to
12:42anyone but hitchcock and nobody where i am even speaks english where are you brazil baby i got conned
12:47by a cam girl but it turns out i love it here okay look you two are always complaining about work
12:52regulations so i'm guessing you know your way around the patrolman's union i need your help to
12:56break in you bet those bastards are everything that's wrong with policing their dress policy is
13:00insane you have to wear a shirt at all times yuck just tell me how i can get to o sullivan's office
13:05undetected no problem he goes to lunch at 12 30 so that's your window at 12 45 the mail is delivered
13:11the guard at the desk always flirts with the mail woman so he'll be distracted then go down the
13:15main hall this is important it's your last bathroom stop on the whole floor it's unisex and
13:19handicapped so you get that bad boy all to yourself tell her about the toilet paper stop
13:23talking about bathrooms fine be your pants what do i care go to the last office on the right and
13:28you're there well that background is on break yeah i got the tickets what do you think front row
13:36bob billy joel you me and the poet of long island huh i know so it says to participate in a
13:45new hobby your partner has expressed interest in have you gotten into anything new lately i started
13:49performing daily checks of my blood oxygen level during covid because i feared for my life oh
13:5398 98 we did it we're back to being raymond amy it's raymy and you can't measure our connection by
14:01blood levels let's do another exercise regulations regulations regulations regulations how much longer
14:08do we have to do this it was supposed to be a meaningful word to both of us but clearly that
14:12wasn't it okay now we're supposed to tell each other a secret no one else knows i'll go first
14:17i once had a sex dream about sanjay gupta this is absurd i know and it was really graphic no these
14:25exercises we're not lovers we're not even friends we're co-workers i'm tired of terry's stupid book
14:33scully's book
14:34i beg your pardon did you just say you want to bring gary i need to speak with my union president
14:44immediately no i'll call you right back okay can i help you out sir i certainly hope so sir
14:50my name is mitchell keith erickson and i have just been assaulted based solely on profession
14:55oh damn it to hell son tell me what happened all right so i go to this phone store right to get my
15:00screen fixed and they say yeah no problem 45 minutes so i wait and i wait 50 minutes go by
15:08nobody helped me it's despicable so i go back into the back room to complain and they're all just
15:13sitting around trash talking billy joel what they said piano man's is only good too well now that's
15:20just insanity uh hey terry um i have to come clean and please don't say anything until i'm done
15:28not that i'm trying to silence you i am listening just say it ten thousand dollars were supposed to
15:33be a hundred dollars and i was too embarrassed to ask for it back boyle i need to come clean too
15:37i knew you made a mistake i was just messing with you you were obviously look boyle it's great that
15:44you're trying to do better but the way you're doing it is kind of messed up if you want to do
15:48something about these issues you have to do it because you think it's the right thing not because
15:52you want me to know about it that just makes stuff weird between us you're right you're right i won't
15:57be as performative i just donated to a great charity but i won't tell you which one or how much
16:03good for you for black trans women it was a thousand dollars dear lord i got out of there 45 minutes ago
16:11why were you in there so long oh sullivan wouldn't let me leave until he had explained to me why reverse
16:15racism was worse than as he called it classic racism how'd you know i'd be here i bumped in a scully and
16:19you told me everything he was really worried you weren't going to take his toilet advice well
16:23thanks for saving me in there yeah of course you know i've always got your back and i'm not trying
16:27to make a point i'm just here to help well you did because i got the footage oh i'm gonna have to
16:32delete this yeah oh wait you're not joking oh no you're a villain why'd you delete it you said
16:46you'd help us if we got proof yeah but i didn't think you'd get proof get proof i thought you just
16:49you know get proof there's proof and there's proof you got the wrong kind of proof i don't
16:52know how much clearer i can be so you were never gonna help us i am helping you i can still get
16:56the charges against your client drop now that i saw that footage i'll get my officers to revise
17:00their statements and they'll be punished no there's no way i can suspend them suspend i thought you
17:04would fire them oh you're being serious now huh i guess jokes are nothing well if i fired them
17:11it would trigger the union's appeal process pba's grievance proceedings allow for both unions and
17:16individual officers to challenge personnel actions by superiors the complaint gets sent up the chain
17:20of command until they get someone who sides with the officers and the courts are a nightmare prosecutors
17:25work closely with cops they're not going to jeopardize their relationship by pursuing cases
17:28against them all the officer has to say is he feared for his life and he gets thrown out look we know all
17:32of this but that doesn't mean you just give up okay so say i don't give up and i get the commissioner
17:37to agree to fire the officers do you know what happens next they file a countersuit yes and the
17:42officers get paid to stay not to mention qualified immunity and now the officers are back on the
17:47street and i am blackballed and then one of the only female captains in the mypd is forced to quit
17:53and you don't want me going i'm one of the good ones and i know how that sounds but i'm not one of
17:57the bad ones who say they're one of the good ones i'm one of the good ones who say they're one of the
18:00good ones yeah i hear it rosa you can stop staring daggers at me let's just go sir do you have a minute
18:06i wanted to apologize being back at work has been weird rose is gone and the world has changed and
18:13you were the one person i thought i could count on to be the same always halt i know i've been acting
18:19crazy and i'm sorry do you know why i engaged in small talk with you earlier because small talk is
18:29for strangers and con men and that's what i am to you now stranger no i i did it because i am a con
18:37man i was trying to con you into believing everything is normal with me when it is not
18:48kevin and i am separated oh my god why it's been a tough year to be a black man
18:59and a police captain and a human i've been pushed to the brink emotionally and physically
19:09i went into survival mode and it seems i have neglected my personal life
19:16does anyone else know not here i have successfully hidden it for months not very well i might add i
19:23made small talk with peralta on five separate occasions and he never even batted an eye he just
19:27blathered on about someone named uh wario yeah he does that but you
19:35you noticed that something was off with me
19:38the very first day you returned that just shows how well you know me
19:43and while i'm not yet ready to talk about it it's uh nice feeling like i'm not alone
19:49anymore and that's thanks to you raymy
20:00just so you know i am not raymy we are raymy just be glad i said it totally yes i am thank you sir
20:08so those cops just gonna keep walking the streets doing this crap with no consequences i'm sorry we
20:13really tried i guess getting the charges dry was something so thanks to rosa because you're not a cop
20:21i hook you up with those five stars on yet
20:28that was rough yep hey so look i'm really sorry about everything i was projecting my insecurities
20:37onto you and that was wrong and i like to think i've done a lot of good as a detective and that i
20:42can continue to do that but
20:49maybe i am part of the problem regardless you're dealing with things in your own way
20:55and i get that it's not on you to make me feel okay about my choices
20:58yes apology accepted and just because our choices are different doesn't mean we're not family like
21:04the fast and the furious no right no not like that this is different obviously the main point
21:10is do you think i made the right decision staying on the force i know i'm kidding i don't even care
21:14what you think your opinion is literally meaningless to me loser yeah now you swung too
21:18far in the opposite direction i felt that it's a hard line to walk so i'll work on it
21:28far in the opposite direction i thought c'mon
21:33not a doctor shh
21:36from your
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