Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Season 8 Episode 05- PBandJ
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00:00Parenting is exhausting.
00:02You're tired because you were up until 5 in the morning
00:05playing a game on your phone.
00:06It's not a game.
00:07It's a realistic pizza parlor simulator.
00:09It's very different.
00:10There's no winning.
00:11Then why do you play?
00:12To earn pizza points to get better toppings.
00:14What's up, Peralta?
00:15Hey, Trudy Judy and Dog Judy.
00:17What's going on?
00:17Are you puppy-sitting for Doug?
00:18Well, I was, but I need you to take him for me
00:20because I'm going on a little vacay.
00:22And let's just say there's going to be some activities
00:25that aren't suitable for our little dog.
00:28Like parasailing.
00:29Huh.
00:30I thought you were building something much more sexual.
00:32Nope.
00:32Just really pumped for parasailing.
00:34Also, there's going to be a lot of ****,
00:35but the dog's okay with that hair.
00:37Oh, as much as we would love to take care of this
00:40extremely unneutered animal, we can't because I'm too allergic.
00:43Wait, why isn't Doug Judy taking care of Dog Judy?
00:45Is he out of town or something?
00:46Oh, no, you didn't hear.
00:48Doug got arrested.
00:49He's going to prison.
00:50Wait, what?
00:51Doug got arrested.
00:51He's going to prison.
00:52No, I heard you.
00:53I was just processing.
00:54Aw.
00:55You want to hug a dog?
00:56Oh, my God.
00:57It's like a third of him.
00:59What's up, Veronta?
01:02Hey, what's going on?
01:03What's up, Veronta?
01:19Hey, what's going on?
01:20Why didn't you tell me you were in jail?
01:22Did you not want me to find out who arrested you?
01:24Is there another cop in your life?
01:25No, none of these pigs mean jack to me.
01:27No offense, Evan.
01:28You've been great this week.
01:28I don't understand.
01:29I thought you went straight.
01:30I did.
01:31I got a job.
01:32I have a wife.
01:33But the other day, I was driving to the new mega target in South
01:35Horns, New Jersey, because they have 50% off whole home mesh
01:39wireless systems.
01:40With a rebate?
01:40No.
01:41Discount taking that register.
01:42Oh, you got to hit that.
01:44I know.
01:45And on the way over there, a guy rear-ended me, and the cops
01:47showed up.
01:48Turns out I had a warrant out for my arrest.
01:49But we wiped your criminal record.
01:51You wiped my New York record.
01:52I stole a car in Trenton five years ago.
01:53Well, you still should have called me.
01:55I could have helped you out.
01:55Wouldn't have mattered.
01:56There's a lot of evidence against me.
01:57I left a picture of me at the scene of the crowd with the
01:59note bragging about how I did it.
02:00Ah.
02:01Well, yes, that would make it difficult.
02:03Impossible.
02:04They move me to Southwest prison tomorrow.
02:05Tomorrow?
02:06I know.
02:07But you know it really bonds me out.
02:08I had no warning.
02:09I only wished I had known it was going to happen so I could
02:11have had one last moment of joy before I get taken to jail.
02:14But alas, tis not to be.
02:16Wait a minute.
02:17What if it tis to be?
02:19What if I drive you to prison?
02:21We could have one more adventure.
02:22Honestly, Jake, I don't see how it's possible to have
02:24fun on the trip to prison.
02:25Yeah, it sucks.
02:26But I don't know, maybe for just a few hours you could focus
02:29on the journey and not the destination.
02:32Focus on the journey and not the destination.
02:35I like that.
02:36Did you steal it from a car commercial?
02:37No, it was an Instagram ad for a travel bidet.
02:39Look, I know it's not perfect, but if you say yes, I promise
02:42I will plan some sexy ass surprises.
02:44How sexy we talking.
02:45How sexy you got.
02:47Is that a 79 Pontiac Trans Amp?
02:50Sexy ass surprise number one.
02:52We're riding in style.
02:53Can't believe the Department of Corrections was cool with you
02:55taking your friend to prison.
02:56Well, I can be very persuasive.
02:58I got the guy and his family a six day past a Pirates Cove
03:01water park.
03:02So many days in the water.
03:03The family's going to be pruning.
03:04Yeah, it wasn't a good bribe.
03:05Well, let's hit the road.
03:06Up, up, up.
03:07Before we do that, there's another surprise,
03:08but I'm going to need your hands free for this one.
03:10Whoa, whoa, whoa.
03:11You got a pen?
03:12I'll show you a little trick I learned from a magician
03:13who for legal purposes shall remain nameless,
03:15but is unquestionably a mind freak.
03:18I can neither confirm nor deny.
03:21Bam!
03:22Your cuffs and your pens, sir.
03:23That was incredibly fast.
03:25Consider, am I mind freaked?
03:27On that note, it is time for sexy ass surprise number two.
03:30A classic Jake and Judy outfit change.
03:32I'm feeling this print.
03:41I thought you might.
03:42We got tigers and toucans.
03:45Tigers and toucs?
03:46Ooh, and now for the piece de resistance.
03:49Ho, ho, ho, ho.
03:50A little French.
03:51I like where this is going.
03:52Et voila.
03:53PB and and J?
03:55Pontiac Bandit and Jake go together like peanut butter and jelly.
03:58It's never coming off, except for in a couple of hours
04:00when I have to check in the prison for five years.
04:01Up, up, up, up.
04:02Journey not the destination.
04:03It's never coming off.
04:04That's the spirit.
04:05Let's ride.
04:08Mind if I DJ?
04:09I was counting on it.
04:10Bust out those banging bar mitzvah beats, bruv.
04:12See what you got.
04:13Kendrick Lamar, Meek Mill, really a lot of Taylor Swift.
04:17I'm over her.
04:18I barely even memorized all the lyrics to folklore.
04:21What's SAS 3?
04:22I'm glad you asked, Mon Frere.
04:23That track is sexy ass surprise number three.
04:26Okay, so I know this audio engineer who's friends with a guy,
04:29who's roommates with a guy, who gets lunch for a guy,
04:31who's friends with a guy who knows Drake,
04:32and he laid down a beat for us to write a song to.
04:35Drake laid down a beat for us?
04:36What?
04:37No, no, the friend did.
04:38The Drake thing was just to establish his credentials.
04:40And it worked.
04:41That dude's like six spots removed from Drake.
04:43He's the real deal.
04:44Uh.
04:45Uh.
04:46Uh.
04:47Uh.
04:48Uh.
04:49Uh.
04:50I don't rule for uh.
04:51I like that.
04:52I thought you would.
04:53Doug and Jake rolling down the street.
04:55PB and Jay, a tasty little treat.
04:57Two cool dudes making sandals for your feet.
05:00What?
05:01I was going for the rhyme, but now I kind of feel like it's a good idea.
05:03Love it.
05:04Making sandals that last is our ideology,
05:06made real by our patented strapless technology.
05:09It's magnets.
05:10Okay.
05:11Yo, you can wear them on the beach.
05:13Wear them on a hike.
05:14Wear them on a peloton exercise bike.
05:16Doug and Jake.
05:17Two best friends.
05:18With the premium overdose shoes for men.
05:21Rawr!
05:22Huh.
05:23That was crazy.
05:24He never even rehearsed it.
05:25Just did it perfectly.
05:26It was like Jackson made an alley.
05:27I call alley.
05:28Ah, I wanted alley.
05:29Okay.
05:30It's time for sexy ass surprise number four.
05:32Let me ask you this.
05:33If you could eat any meal on earth, what would it be?
05:35Cheeseburger cracker flavor combos.
05:37Philly cheesesteaks from Pat's.
05:39Popeye's biscuits.
05:40McDonald's fries.
05:41Wendy's nuggets.
05:42Sonic tots.
05:43Fountain Coke.
05:44And of course, my mama's sweet potato pie.
05:47Oh.
05:48Wow.
05:49That's actually a very tall order.
05:50Which I completely failed.
05:52What?
05:53You smorgasborded it?
05:54I smorgasborded it.
05:56You know what this calls for?
05:58What's that?
05:59Foot slap.
06:00Ooh.
06:01How did you find cheeseburger cracker combos?
06:03Weren't they discontinued?
06:04Tell me the whole story.
06:05A bodega in Queens had an old box.
06:07Wow.
06:08Yeah.
06:09Kinda makes me sad though.
06:10How come?
06:11One day it's out in the world thriving, and then poof!
06:14It's pulled off the streets.
06:16Well, I mean, it's not like it's gone forever.
06:20You know, it'll be back in circulation soon.
06:22Maybe.
06:23But sometimes when a product is taken out the shelves, it never returns.
06:26It's gonna be okay.
06:27I promise I'll visit the combos every month.
06:30Combos will be very grateful for that.
06:32But lucky to have a friend like you.
06:39Charles?
06:40Yeah!
06:41What are you doing?
06:42What are you doing?
06:43Why are you alone with a criminal who's escaped you multiple times?
06:45Seems like a loaded question.
06:46Oh, that's not even half my load.
06:48Okay.
06:49Oh my God, I'm too late.
06:50You're already seduced by Doug Judy's wiles.
06:52Okay, I appreciate the concern, but Doug has changed.
06:54This was an old crime, and he's already owned up to it.
06:56He's not trying to escape.
06:58He's already out of his handcuffs.
06:59Just so we can do our sweet-ass outfit change.
07:01Tigers and toucans!
07:02Tigers and toucans!
07:03Obviously, they're fantastic, but Jake, by trusting him, you're putting your job on the line,
07:07which means you're also putting my job on the line.
07:09How so?
07:10Because if you get fired, I will swim out into the ocean until I'm too tired to swim back,
07:13and I will sink to the bottom, and then I won't have a job.
07:15Oh my God.
07:16All right, well, I'm already driving him to prison, so there's nothing I can do about it now.
07:19Oh, yes, there is.
07:21Welcome to the boil, bus!
07:23Why are we getting this whack ride?
07:25Charles refuses to accept what close friends we are.
07:27He thinks you're trying to escape, and then your crew's on the lookout for the Trans Am,
07:30so he insisted we switch into his weird family bus.
07:32That's ridiculous.
07:33Isn't it?
07:34It doesn't matter what vehicle we're in.
07:36That's what I said.
07:37I'm gonna escape from you either way.
07:38Exactly.
07:39Wait, what was that?
07:41I still don't understand.
07:42What do you mean you're escaping?
07:43Sorry, bro.
07:44Plan's already in motion.
07:45Trudy came to you.
07:46You took the bait.
07:47Come on.
07:48If you were really trying to escape, why would you tell me?
07:49Honestly, I didn't like lying to you.
07:51You're a good friend.
07:52Well, if I'm such a good friend, why are you trying to escape from me?
07:54I'm not trying to escape from you.
07:55I'm trying to escape from prison.
07:56Let me ask you this.
07:57Do you know why I stole that car?
07:58Because you love doing crimes?
08:00That's me directly quoting your catchphrase.
08:02First of all, my catchphrase is slurp slurp.
08:04You've never once said that.
08:05I say it constantly.
08:06Second of all, me loving crime is classic empty bravado.
08:09The truth is I was arrested when I was 22 for something stupid.
08:13When I got out, nobody would hire me because I had a criminal record.
08:16My dreams of being a landscape architect were out the window.
08:19That was your dream?
08:20I wanted to be the Black Edward Scissorhands.
08:21Oh, that's great.
08:22I get all that, but that's not what this is about.
08:24I mean, you could have escaped from anyone, but you chose to set me up,
08:27and now my job and my name are all on the line.
08:29You used me, Doug. You're a bad friend.
08:31You're the bad friend.
08:32You're the bad friend.
08:33I got you a tracksuit. Tigers and toques.
08:34Might as well be a jumpsuit. A prison jumpsuit.
08:37You're taking me to prison.
08:38The fact that you thought I'd go willingly means you don't know me at all.
08:41Oh, please. I know everything about you.
08:43You didn't know my catchphrase.
08:44You have never once said slurp slurp before today.
08:46That you believe that is so hurtful.
08:48Okay, well, there's clearly only one way to settle this.
08:51Ignore him and take him directly to prison.
08:53A high-stakes trivia contest to decide who's the better friend.
08:55What?
08:56If I win, you agree not to try and escape.
08:58But if I win, you agree to let me go.
09:00Deal.
09:01That's a bad idea.
09:02I cannot let you take this risk, Jake.
09:03It'll be just like game night at the Camden Senior Center.
09:05You can be Estelle Minderman.
09:06She's my favorite MC.
09:08Damn it, I'm in.
09:11The name of the game is called Who Knows Moe?
09:13Friend or Foe?
09:14Are you for real or just fo sho?
09:15A little wordy.
09:16Each contestant will answer and ask ten personal questions.
09:19Whoever gets the most correct answers will be crowned the better friend.
09:22Also there is that whole going to prison or not thing.
09:25America can't relate to the prison stuff.
09:26It's too real.
09:27It's a game about friendship.
09:28And may the better friend win.
09:30Jake, you will ask the first question.
09:33Begin.
09:34What is my middle name?
09:35You tell people it's Zach, but it's really Jeffrey.
09:38No, it's Zach.
09:39Like Zach Morris.
09:40Point for doggy.
09:41What is the name of the alter ego I used for fancy crimes?
09:44A Lord Poncy Cumbershine.
09:46Tis Crook.
09:47Point for Jake.
09:48What is my favorite Knicks memory?
09:50When they fired Phil Jackson.
09:52Yeah.
09:53That was a good day.
09:55What is the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me?
09:57When you were cut out of that season of Real Housewives where you were dating Ramona.
10:00I wasn't embarrassed.
10:01I was just disappointed in the way it was handled.
10:03Yeah.
10:04What is my least favorite word?
10:05Buttress.
10:06It just makes me picture a mattress with a butt.
10:08What is my least favorite thing?
10:10Meringue.
10:11Because it looks so much better than it tastes.
10:12It's a trick, fool.
10:15Doug's up by one.
10:16Jake, you need to answer the final question correctly otherwise he wins.
10:19Doug, lay it on him.
10:21Hmm.
10:22Jake Peralta, do I have an earring?
10:27Um, what?
10:29You heard me.
10:30You've been in the car for three hours.
10:31You've known me for seven years.
10:34Do I have an earring?
10:37Oh no, I'm drawing a blank.
10:39I can kind of picture a diamond stud.
10:41That'll be a good look.
10:42Or maybe a gold cross or a little hoop.
10:44I do have what versatility is.
10:46Now I'm just seeing it pretty clearly with no earring.
10:48Ugh, this is hard.
10:50But I'm going to go with my gut and say, yes, you do have an ear.
10:56Nothing but lobe?
10:57This whole time?
10:58Since the day we met.
11:00I guess I know you better after all.
11:03Or do you?
11:05Wait, why are you smiling?
11:07Because we played you!
11:09If you actually knew me, you would have known that I only agreed to do who knows mo friend or foe or you for real or just for show in order to stall.
11:16I was in on it.
11:17Estelle Minderman is the code word we use for when there's a twist.
11:20Because when Estelle hosts game night at the senior center, she always makes sure one of the games has a sexy twist.
11:26And when I was writing my answers into my phone, I was secretly texting Captain Holt, our vehicle description and location.
11:32Backup is already on the way.
11:35Wait, why are you smiling now?
11:37Because I played you.
11:38I knew you would text for backup, so I changed the contacts while I was DJing.
11:42Kendrick Lamar, Meek Mill, really a lot of Taylor Swift.
11:45So when you were texting Captain Holt, you were actually texting Trudy, Judy.
11:49State troopers are on their way. Sincerely, Raymond Holt.
11:52Now my crew knows exactly where we are and exactly what we're driving.
11:56Because I know you mo.
11:58Slap, slap.
12:04What do we do?
12:05We can't outrun Doug's men.
12:06Boil bus tops out at 50.
12:08Shh.
12:09I'm calling Holt for help.
12:10Go for Trudy.
12:11Oh, damn it!
12:12Yeah, I changed all the numbers.
12:13Come on.
12:14Charles, give me your phone.
12:17All right, all right.
12:18Roger, what's going on?
12:19Sir, I need your help.
12:20Doug Judy tricked me and now his crew knows our location and they're on their way to help him escape.
12:24Hey, Captain Holt.
12:25Doug says hi.
12:26How many times have I warned you not to trust that man?
12:28A lot of times.
12:29But honestly, you tell me not to do things so often, I kind of just tune it out.
12:33If Doug Judy escapes, I can't help you. You will be fired.
12:36Okay, I know I messed up, but can you at least get us some backup?
12:39Send me a pin of your location. I'll have state troopers rendezvous with you.
12:42Do Judy's men know what car you're driving?
12:43Yes, they...
12:45No.
12:46Not for long.
12:47What the hell is this?
12:49This is the front of a Galaxy 500 welded to the back of a Datsun with half its windows and no trunk.
12:54It's all I could afford.
12:55You really think you're gonna make it to the prison in that?
12:57Well, we only have 38 miles left, so sorry, Judy, but it looks like I have the upper hand now.
13:07Door fell off.
13:08So, what you want to talk about?
13:10Nothing.
13:11We're not talking anymore.
13:12No.
13:13No, no, no.
13:14No phone call for you.
13:15I'm calling for you?
13:16Yeah.
13:17It was gonna be another fun road trip surprise, but you don't deserve it.
13:19Sup, Rosa?
13:20Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy.
13:22No, no, no.
13:23There's no singing for him now.
13:24But you made me learn such a long song.
13:26It has 35 verses and no chorus.
13:27I know.
13:28I'm sorry, but plans have changed.
13:30Mm, let me guess.
13:31Doug wasn't excited about prison and now he's trying to escape.
13:33You know it.
13:34Yes.
13:35Good luck, Doug.
13:36Thank you for planning that.
13:39What's the next surprise?
13:40There isn't one.
13:41You ruined it.
13:42There's no more fun.
13:43So that's how it is?
13:44Well, this is gonna end with me in prison.
13:45We could have a good time.
13:47But now it's gonna end with me riding off into the sunset, a free man, and we're all moody?
13:51You're not escaping.
13:52And if you did, I would lose my badge.
13:54Maybe it's for the best.
13:55You make a dope realtor.
13:56I don't want to be a realtor.
13:57You're telling me you don't want to sell a penthouse to Zayn Malik and then party with
14:00him afterwards?
14:01I mean, that does sound kind of cool.
14:04Next thing you know, you're the go-to guy for all of One Direction's property needs.
14:08No, there's too much tension between Zayn and the others.
14:12You're selling me a pipe dream.
14:13All I'm saying is you're more than just your job.
14:16You know, it doesn't matter.
14:17It still doesn't give you the right to get me fired.
14:18Honestly, it seems like a small price to pay for my freedom.
14:21Think about it.
14:23That's all I ask.
14:24Finally.
14:25Captain Raymond Holt called in for backup.
14:29We're supposed to escort you to the prison.
14:30Copy that.
14:31Thanks.
14:32What are y'all wearing?
14:33Tigers and toucans.
14:34Yes, sir.
14:35Interesting.
14:36And why isn't he cuffed?
14:37Don't worry about it.
14:38Peralta knows I wouldn't physically overwhelm him.
14:41What's happening here is more of a mental overwhelm.
14:43There's been no overwhelm of any kind.
14:45And yet I just tricked you into thinking overwhelm is a word.
14:48No.
14:49Stay in contact if you need anything.
14:52Hey, if we're not gonna talk, can we at least play some music?
14:56I can get with this.
14:57What are you doing?
14:58Wow.
14:59I can't have a diverse musical palette.
15:00I'm not sure what you're so happy about.
15:01I have backup now.
15:02I'm choosing to focus on the journey, not the destination.
15:04See it yourself.
15:05Wait.
15:06This isn't part of your plan, is it?
15:07Are the state troopers actually your guys?
15:08Sounds like something I would do.
15:09I mean, how would you even have contacted them?
15:11Unless somebody messed with Holt's phone.
15:12Classic Doug.
15:13No.
15:14That's crazy.
15:15You're just bluffing.
15:16Also classic Doug.
15:17Rerouting.
15:18Rerouting?
15:19It's probably nothing.
15:20I'm sure you're just bluffing.
15:21You're just bluffing.
15:22You're just bluffing.
15:23You're just bluffing.
15:24You're just bluffing.
15:25Also classic Doug.
15:27Rerouting.
15:28Rerouting?
15:29It's probably nothing.
15:30I'm sure we're going down a side road away from the prison for a good reason.
15:34Hey, this is Peralta.
15:35Why'd you guys just turn?
15:36Where are you going?
15:37This is the way to the prison.
15:38Uh-huh.
15:39I'm heading into a trap, aren't I?
15:40Hard to say.
15:41But if those are your guys, what are they waiting for?
15:43Don't know.
15:44But if they're not your guys, where are we going?
15:45Unclear.
15:46I'm calling Charles.
15:47What's up, Peralta?
15:48No!
15:49All right, Jake.
15:50Stay calm.
15:51This all makes sense.
15:52You called for backup, then Holt said backup was coming, and now they're here.
15:54These guys are real.
15:55What's up, Peralta?
15:56No!
15:57All right, Jake.
15:58Stay calm.
15:59You're right.
16:00That's good logic.
16:01I can't trust anyone.
16:02Okay.
16:03We lost them.
16:04I gotta know.
16:05Were they actually your guys?
16:06Nope.
16:07Damn it.
16:08I knew it.
16:09Whatever.
16:10Doesn't matter anyway.
16:11We're almost there.
16:12We're just taking a different route.
16:13At the next intersection, turn left.
16:14Wait.
16:15This doesn't look great.
16:16Sure it does.
16:17We just took a different route, like you said.
16:18Came in the back way.
16:19Yeah, but prison.
16:20It should be visible.
16:21You have reached your destination.
16:22Uh-oh.
16:23Slurp slurp for all tests.
16:24Slurp slurp.
16:25Slurp slurp.
16:26I don't understand.
16:27How did this happen?
16:28Remember when I switched out the contacts?
16:29I also changed the destination in your GPS.
16:30So we've been driving to the wrong place this whole time?
16:31Everything else was just a distraction?
16:32I wanted you to focus on the journey, not the destination.
16:33Oh.
16:34Yeah.
16:35I got that from you.
16:36Dumbass.
16:37He's not a dumbass, Judy.
16:38It was a brilliant plan.
16:39I had to hinge on him handing you his phone and not noticing that he was driving directly
16:40to us.
16:41Yeah, but there was also some noise.
16:42Oh.
16:43Oh.
16:44Oh.
16:45Oh.
16:46Oh.
16:47Oh.
16:48Oh.
16:49Oh.
16:50Oh.
16:51Oh.
16:52Oh.
16:53Oh.
16:54Oh.
16:55Oh.
16:56Oh.
16:57Oh.
16:58Oh.
16:59Oh.
17:00Oh.
17:01Oh.
17:02Oh.
17:03Oh.
17:04Oh.
17:05Oh.
17:06But there was also some mental misdirection.
17:08It was a bit of a chess match.
17:09It's true.
17:10Yeah.
17:11A chess match with a dumbass.
17:12All right.
17:13We gotta move.
17:14Judy's, you get in the SUV.
17:15I'll take care of the cop.
17:16What do you mean, take care of him?
17:17Shoot him in the face.
17:18What?
17:19Doug, who are these guys?
17:20I don't know.
17:21Trudy, who are these guys?
17:22Well, your old crew split when you went legit, so I put an ad for goons on the internet.
17:25Task rabbit?
17:26Craigslist.
17:27Trudy, never contact Craigslist groups.
17:28He's a cop.
17:29He's seen our faces.
17:30It's okay.
17:31He doesn't care about you.
17:32He doesn't even know your name.
17:33It's Vince Thompson.
17:36I get all about you.
17:37Guy whose name I can't even remember.
17:38It's Vince Michael Thompson.
17:39What is wrong, Z?
17:40Look, you can let us do what you hired us to do, or you can join your buddy in a ditch.
17:44Fair enough.
17:45Enjoy the ditch, Jake.
17:47Enjoy the ditch?
17:48Those are your final words to me?
17:50Hey man, it's not a game.
17:51And I'm not a stale menderman.
17:53Life is about choices.
17:54Difficult choices.
17:55And sometimes...
17:56Now!
17:58All right, nobody move.
17:59Stay where you are.
18:00See you later, Thomas!
18:06I'll take the prisoner.
18:07Oh, can you actually give me one second?
18:09Thanks.
18:10Look, Doug, I'm sorry it's gotta be like this.
18:12If you're mad at me, I get it.
18:14I'm not mad at you.
18:15I'm mad at myself.
18:16I should never become friends with a cop.
18:18I mean, how do I expect this to end?
18:20Well, regardless, thanks for saving me back there with the Estelle Menderman thing.
18:25I wasn't gonna let them hurt you, Jake.
18:27We're PB and Jay.
18:28We're PB and Jay.
18:30Yeah.
18:31I wanna hug you, but...
18:33you're cuffed.
18:35You can hug me.
18:48Okay.
18:50You can take him.
18:52I'll see you soon.
18:55Peralta, there's a call for you.
19:00Oh, is it a casting agent from Double Dare?
19:02I submitted as a kid.
19:03Maybe they're finally calling to put me on the show.
19:05You think they'd be calling 30 years later?
19:07All right, fine.
19:08I also submitted to the reboot.
19:09It's not Double Dare.
19:10It's an inmate from South Hill State Prison.
19:14Doug Judy.
19:18Hello?
19:19Hey, Peralta.
19:20What's good?
19:21Hey, Doug.
19:22Are you okay?
19:23I wanted you to know, and I've been thinking about it a lot.
19:24I didn't mean what I said.
19:26I'm glad I met you.
19:27Sure.
19:28It ended badly, but...
19:29We had some good times along the way, too.
19:31We went on a cruise together.
19:32We flew on Mark Cuban's jet.
19:33We ate at a restaurant next to Gail from Top Chef.
19:36Yeah, and then you got so mad at her about Last Chance Kitchen.
19:39I wasn't mad.
19:40I just think it's insane that they make you go online to watch it!
19:42The point is, I wouldn't trade those moments for anything.
19:45I'm choosing to focus on the journey.
19:49Wait a minute.
19:51What language is that?
19:52I don't know.
19:53Maybe Dutch.
19:54There's a lot of that in here.
19:55You know how active the Dutch Mafia is in Jersey.
19:57Judy.
19:58Okay, fine.
19:59Surprise!
20:00I'm in Amsterdam!
20:01I escaped from prison.
20:03My wife and I are living a life here now.
20:05Amsterdam is great.
20:06Jake, they got universal healthcare.
20:08Legalized marijuana.
20:10And the workers are treated so much better.
20:12But you know what the best part is?
20:13That you're a free man again.
20:15No.
20:16Stroopwafels.
20:17They're like these wait for cookies with caramel in between.
20:19I think I've seen those at Trader Joe's.
20:21Well, look.
20:22I guess I'm happy that you're happy.
20:24Well, I owe it all to you.
20:26What do you mean?
20:27I think you know what I mean.
20:28Uh, nope.
20:29No idea.
20:30Really?
20:31Because after we hugged goodbye, I noticed your pin was in my pocket.
20:34Oh.
20:35That's weird.
20:36It was?
20:37Uh-huh.
20:38And then I used it to mind freak myself out of my cuffs and then out of jail.
20:42Well.
20:43Then I guess it's certainly lucky that it ended up in your pocket.
20:45I wonder how it got there.
20:47Yeah.
20:48Well, I guess we'll never know.
20:51Well, however it got there, I'm glad it did.
20:55I love you, Peralta.
20:57Love you too, Judy.
20:58Tigers and Dukes.
20:59Tigers and Dukes.
21:00Tigers and Dukes.
21:01Not a doctor.
21:02Shhh.
21:03From your lawn.
21:05From your lawn.
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