Skip to playerSkip to main content
Gogglebox - Season 26 Episode 14
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull

Category

📺
TV
Transcript
00:00Oh, for God's sake.
00:01Oh, it's probably because I've got high blood pressure,
00:03blood pressure, and my feet are puffy.
00:06Don't say you're going to be trapped in these moods.
00:08No.
00:10I literally...
00:11We're going to have to get a strong man from this...
00:13Oh, no, they're coming, they're coming.
00:14That's fantastic, Mary.
00:16Do you think I should have got size 11?
00:21Ah!
00:23Earth clappers have been gasted.
00:25You want some of this?
00:27Oh, lettuce!
00:28Look out!
00:30Oh, now, there's a controversial statement.
00:33The gravy.
00:36Yeah.
00:38Do you like this music?
00:39No, not particularly.
00:40So suck on that.
00:42Oh, wow.
00:43He's been a bad boy.
00:45Don't ever take me to a restaurant like that.
00:47Not a chance, do you?
00:48Oh!
00:49Yes, look at that.
00:50He's had an absolute feast.
00:53Whoa!
00:54For a banana?
00:55This is insane.
00:57Well, thank all that sounds like I've got a headache.
00:59Come on.
01:00It is like putting chicken in a vodka tonic, this.
01:03LAUGHTER
01:03That's very modern, isn't it?
01:05Nothing, no-one saw that coming.
01:07No.
01:08In the week, a runaway reindeer named Buddy
01:11sparked an emergency rescue operation in Farmby.
01:14We enjoyed lots of great telly.
01:17BBC One was treating us to some marvellous miniatures.
01:22What are we going to be doing for you today, please?
01:24Well, I would love to have a model made of the library that I used as a child.
01:29I do take Ezra to the library to story time sometimes.
01:33We haven't been for a while, to be honest.
01:35Couldn't go this morning cos I had to go for my Botox top-up.
01:39Sorry, Ezra.
01:40Sorry, Ezra.
01:41No.
01:41This library for you.
01:42No, we need Botox.
01:45Freddie Flintoff had us up for a game of darts on ITV.
01:49Graham, I heard that you used to be in The Police.
01:51I did, yeah.
01:52And as you look around, half of this Manchester audience...
01:54He's a terrible guy.
01:55Don't worry, he's retired.
01:57Freddie stood on something.
01:59Like a milk crate.
02:01I'm not sure, remember, he was a cricketeer, wasn't he?
02:03So he was tall anyway.
02:05A what, what?
02:06Cricketeer.
02:07They were playing cricket.
02:08Huh?
02:09Cricketer.
02:10Not cricketeer?
02:11No.
02:11Shit, yeah.
02:12That as well.
02:15Why is someone who plays football?
02:16Football here.
02:19And Ed Sheeran was giving it his best shot on Netflix.
02:24And my song Perfect gets used for a lot of proposals, a lot of weddings.
02:28So I'm going to sing it.
02:30He's going to propose.
02:31Hopefully she says yes.
02:32To be fair, I'm glad Ben didn't get Ed Sheeran playing at our engagement situation.
02:37I don't think he'd have been able to afford it.
02:39Well, also, I'm not that big of a fan.
02:42Yeah, you'd have probably preferred JLS.
02:46Although they wouldn't have fitted it into a hotel room.
02:50It's me, Ben and JLS.
02:52Oh, do you know, I hadn't opened my I think calendar 1st of December, innit?
03:05Best friends Jenny and Lee.
03:08Oh.
03:10Number one.
03:11Where is it?
03:13Why is it?
03:15Who's opened this?
03:16What?
03:16I haven't opened it.
03:21You have?
03:22I haven't.
03:24What are you?
03:24What?
03:25I can tell.
03:26Look at your face.
03:27I can tell when you're lying.
03:30You've already opened it, haven't you?
03:33Oh, don't be greedily.
03:35I thought I'd start it off for you.
03:36It's dug to the roof of my mouth.
03:40Good.
03:44This week, a global superstar went for a stroll around the Big Apple on Netflix.
03:49Ed Sheeran was bosking at his start and you used to bosk.
03:52Yeah.
03:52So what went wrong?
03:54Why are you sat with me?
03:55I don't mind Ed Sheeran.
03:57He's inoffensive.
03:58He's vanilla.
03:59He's vanilla is what he is.
04:01He's a crowd pleaser.
04:02It's like he's doing a live gig on the streets of New York and it's all in one take.
04:16Do you not remember there was a time when Shape of You was on the radio and you could
04:19not avoid that for about five years?
04:21It still is.
04:22Never mind you, I'm in love with your body.
04:26Ooh, I, ooh, I, ooh, I, ooh, I, ooh.
04:28Come on now, follow my lead.
04:30Come, come on now, follow my lead.
04:32Mmm.
04:33I'm in love with the shape of you.
04:36I'm feeling like a man, no, too.
04:39Sorry, I'm getting into it.
04:40I can't.
04:41You're doing too much.
04:42I can't.
04:42I'm very boring, but I don't like this sort of music at all.
04:46Do you think if you kept listening to it, you'd like it?
04:48No.
04:49You all good?
04:50You all good?
04:51Yeah, we're good.
04:52Oh, we just finished there then.
04:53I don't really think he has to re-air start, do you really?
04:55Well, he might.
04:56It's to get the soundcheck.
04:58Oh, all right, Rhodey.
05:00Where are you going?
05:03Where are you going, Ed?
05:04Story continues.
05:05Hey, man, how are you?
05:06Good, how are you?
05:07Can you take me to the highline, please?
05:09Yeah.
05:09Does he know who he is?
05:10Do you know who he is?
05:11Do you know who he is?
05:12That's Ed Sheeran.
05:13This guy got in touch for, I have, like, songs that people use in their weddings.
05:17Oh, pick that one up.
05:18You're a bit of a name-like, are you?
05:20Yeah, who are you?
05:21Who are you?
05:21I'll tell the wife when I get home.
05:23She'll probably know who you are.
05:24And this guy's going to propose to his girlfriend, so I thought I'd go and surprise him.
05:28Oh, my God, I would die.
05:30What would you do if Nat proposed to you and Ed Sheeran showed up?
05:34I mean, I feel like Ed Sheeran showing up would be more believable than Nat proposing.
05:39I found a love for me.
05:43He's just gone straight into it.
05:45Why is he singing it now?
05:46Oh, I love this song.
05:47It makes me cry.
05:48Oh, for fuck's sake.
05:49Darling, you look perfect tonight.
05:54Oh, did you see her?
05:54She went double T.
05:56Look at you.
05:56Is that Jerem?
05:57I tell you what, I would turn my mobility scooter around and follow him if he was doing this.
06:02It's a cabbie more than just my secrets.
06:05Is this the couple?
06:06Who's the couple?
06:06There they are.
06:07Oh, they're there, they're there, they're there.
06:09Oh, look.
06:11Of our own.
06:13We are still kids and we're so...
06:15Oh.
06:15Oh.
06:17What goosebumps, literally.
06:18I know, I am.
06:19I'd forget about the proposal, I'd be like, forget this man, I'm here for Ed Sheeran.
06:23I'd be staring at him the whole time.
06:24Yeah.
06:25Oh, my God, you're here.
06:27You are the most amazing, beautiful girl in the world.
06:30Ed, can you show up a minute, I get what you say.
06:33I got one question.
06:35Will you marry me?
06:36Oh, what's she going to say?
06:38Of course, she's going to say yes.
06:40Yeah.
06:40Oh, that is lovely.
06:44Oh, she said yes, well, she couldn't hardly say no, could she?
06:47Bloody hell, imagine he pulled out big guns.
06:49With Ed Sheeran and she said no.
06:51She was kissing her, I was confused about, she should figure it out why I'm...
06:54Oh, he's going in the subway.
06:56Don't say he's patronising some more people.
06:58Yeah.
07:00What's going on?
07:03How's he going to perform on the train?
07:04I wouldn't appreciate that.
07:06I'd already be overstimulated in that environment.
07:09And then Ed Sheeran's there with his flipping rinky-tink guitar.
07:13Do you guys want a song?
07:15Yeah.
07:15Would you like a song?
07:16Would you like a song?
07:17What else are you good for, Ed?
07:19What about singing a song that we've actually heard of, Ed?
07:22Like Streets of London by...
07:25Ralph McTel.
07:26Ralph McTel.
07:27Days is a sweet perfume of the mountain.
07:31Grass are rolled down.
07:32Do you know what?
07:33This feels a bit too orchestrated for me, this,
07:35because all these people are very glam.
07:37I just love her in the browns.
07:39Yeah.
07:41Come to the castle on the hill.
07:45Driving at the handshake.
07:48Get that guitar in your hand.
07:50Play me a bit, Ed Sheeran.
07:51What's it worth?
07:52What's it worth?
07:53Chuck my tenor.
07:57Erm...
07:57I could hear it, I could hear it there.
07:58No, no, I could hear that one.
08:00First note, first note.
08:05Don't look at me when you play that, please.
08:06That's uncomfortable.
08:07Yeah, try not to lock eyes.
08:11In Caffilly...
08:13I don't know if you know what it is.
08:14I like to take a hard-boiled sweet to bed.
08:17Yeah, I have.
08:18Dave and his wife, Shirley.
08:20You've got some withers out there, haven't you?
08:22Aye.
08:24When do you buy them, then?
08:26I can't remember about it in a week.
08:28Specifically for...
08:29Yeah.
08:30...having a sweet to go to bed.
08:32Oh, right.
08:33Cos as I say goodnight...
08:35Oh, yeah, I know.
08:36I go up there...
08:37Yeah.
08:37You say, no, I'm going to bed now.
08:41I'm off, then.
08:42Yeah, I know, I think, thank fuck for that.
08:44No!
08:47Can I have a right fucking morning?
08:49On Monday, it was all about the little things on BBC One.
08:54Good things come in small packages.
08:57That's what Mum always used to say to me when I was growing up.
08:59I don't understand people that want to make things in miniature.
09:02You just want it big.
09:06I want everything big.
09:07They say it's the little things that mean the most.
09:10That's true.
09:11And in this series, we're taking that to heart.
09:15Oh, look at that.
09:16This is up my mum's street, this.
09:18She loves little shit like that.
09:20The craft and skill of our team of miniaturists...
09:23Miniaturists.
09:24There's all sorts of ists now, isn't there?
09:26Nudist.
09:27Yeah.
09:28Naturist.
09:29Miniaturist.
09:30Yeah, vapist.
09:31Shines through in every delicate detail.
09:34I've got stupidly fat fingers like Richmond sausages.
09:37There's no way I could do anything like that.
09:39Welcome to the marvellous miniature workshop.
09:43If I was going to have a marvellous den, I think...
09:45Ponte Guindy Peb would be yours, wouldn't it?
09:48What?
09:48Ponte Guindy Peb.
09:50No, not necessarily, sure.
09:53All right.
09:54Leah, welcome to the workshop.
09:55What are we going to be doing for you today, please?
09:58Well, I would love to have a model made of the library that I used as a child.
10:03Oh!
10:04Oh!
10:05Oh!
10:06Why?
10:06Our library was good.
10:07Why would you want the fucking library?
10:09Because it brings back memories.
10:11Shh!
10:12I mean, there are always beautiful buildings for a start.
10:16Not always so.
10:17No, no.
10:18Are they?
10:18I'm not sure they're always beautiful buildings, are they?
10:20No.
10:21Sturry Library certainly isn't.
10:22No, it's really not.
10:23Sturry's got a library.
10:25But there is another little bit to it.
10:28Oh, come on.
10:28Oh, there's backstories, Mary.
10:30I've got a feeling there's a back story coming on.
10:32My favourite memory is from when I was 14 and a little bit.
10:36I met my husband there.
10:38Oh!
10:39Ah!
10:39As if she met her husband in the library.
10:42I've always wanted the scenario like that.
10:43Oh, my God.
10:44We both reached for the same birth.
10:46Oh!
10:47And he said something about university.
10:49And I thought, he had a place at university.
10:51But when he turned around, I could see his school cap sticking out of his back pocket.
10:56He pretended to be older than he was.
10:58And unfortunately, he died just over three years ago.
11:03Oh, that's really sad.
11:05That's sad.
11:05I'm so sorry for your loss.
11:07Sorry.
11:08Anyway.
11:09Anyway.
11:10Moving on.
11:11What do you want in this library like?
11:13Let's have a look at this one.
11:15Wow.
11:15Oh, gosh.
11:16That's impressive.
11:17Fucking hell.
11:18I bet she's going...
11:18We're not going to be able to make this, love.
11:21Hannah begins with the outer shell.
11:24MDF walls are taped together to form the Grand Edwardian Reading Room.
11:29Look at that bit.
11:31What, sellotaping bits of MDF together?
11:33Yeah.
11:34Then comes the intricate parquet.
11:36Oh, look, she's doing parquet floor.
11:38Oh, God, she's going the all ugly.
11:40It takes five hours.
11:42Five hours to do that floor.
11:43I'm not being funny.
11:44I could probably floor a whole house in five hours.
11:46Hannah is turning her attention to the most important items in any library.
11:51Books.
11:52Toilets.
11:53The books.
11:55There.
11:56Hannah needs to make 3,000 of them.
11:593,000 books?
12:01Tiny jackets are printed in miniature on sticky paper
12:05and wrapped neatly around each block.
12:07Oh, it's making my eyes and my fingers go funny just looking.
12:11Me too.
12:12She's made little books, Tracer.
12:14And with incredible precision, glues them into position on the shelves.
12:19She's even putting them in with tweezers.
12:20And they all look so unique.
12:22None of them look the same.
12:25That is amazing.
12:27Now it's time to find out if Hannah's managed to pull off a storybook ending.
12:32Oh, she's got to come and have a look at it now.
12:34Oh, yeah.
12:34For me, she'd better be in bits at this.
12:36I'm talking, wailing, screaming, crying.
12:40Full scene.
12:413, 2, 1.
12:42Oh, my God.
12:45Wow.
12:46That's pretty cool.
12:47Oh, that's smart.
12:48Where's the roof?
12:52She hasn't finished it.
12:53Look at the detail.
13:02That looks so good.
13:04I just want to be a miniature person and go inside there.
13:06Do you know what I mean?
13:07You are a miniature person.
13:09And there's one tiny detail that's an extra special surprise for Leah.
13:15Brace yourself.
13:17The school cap.
13:18Oh.
13:20That Neil's school cap.
13:22Oh, bless.
13:25That'll set her off, Mary.
13:27I've got tears.
13:28I've got tears.
13:30Oh, she's welling up now.
13:32I thought about you a lot, and Neil, thank you for letting me do this.
13:36Honestly, thanks for trusting me.
13:38It's a thank-a-thon, Natty.
13:39Oh, that's lovely.
13:40I could see myself being able to do that.
13:43Yeah, you've got little cute hands.
13:45I've got penised hands.
13:47Penis hands?
13:48Penised.
13:49Penis hands?
13:51Penis.
13:51Like, I'd be good playing the piano.
13:54Penist.
13:55Penist.
13:56What a penis?
13:57You started saying penis?
13:58I've got penis hands.
14:07In Wiltshire.
14:09While you were in London, I've been busy.
14:11And the extraordinary thing is that this tree that I bought has been reduced.
14:16Yeah, it's lovely, Natty.
14:18It's a lovely one.
14:19And it's a very good condition.
14:21Giles and his wife, Mary.
14:23Can't you put it over in that corner?
14:25Well, then we lose Mrs Crang's armchair, Mary, which is very nice for people to sit in that
14:32corner with the reading light.
14:34I think you put it in Mrs Crang's cupboard in room four.
14:38Yeah, but it would take a day to empty the contents of Mrs Crang's cupboard.
14:42Just put it in front of the cupboard and move the table.
14:45Oh, all right.
14:46Won't that be in everyone's way, in Prickle People?
14:48No, because I think people would rather have the...
14:51Prickle People.
14:53They'd rather have it than not.
14:55Yeah.
14:56On Sunday night, our favourite darts-based quiz show was back on ITB.
15:00Here we go.
15:04You were in darts.
15:06Aye, aye, aye.
15:07Oi.
15:08Two of my favourite things, Natty.
15:10Darts and trivia.
15:12Mary?
15:13You've spent so much time in London, you don't know what I'm like anymore.
15:17I...
15:18Darts and trivia.
15:20You've never been interested in darts since I met you up to 60 years ago.
15:25You'd be surprised how much I've changed in the last six months, Mary.
15:28I've rewired my brain.
15:34I'm not as good as I was.
15:36You're shit, baby.
15:37No, I was not.
15:38I held in this lady's champion, I love you now.
15:41I've hit a couple 180s in my time.
15:42You've done one.
15:43I've done one.
15:43You've done one?
15:44You've done it in the flat.
15:45I know, I know.
15:46I couldn't believe it.
15:47You thought there was something going wrong.
15:48There's no...
15:49I think 180 for me, there's no feeling like that in life.
15:52I've never felt that way again.
15:53I'm chasing that high.
15:54I've never felt that high forever.
15:55In the programme, it was Zaya and Lee who had made it to the final.
16:00There's eight red segments on the board and a prize behind each one.
16:03Here's what they're playing for tonight.
16:05Some of the praises are crap, isn't they?
16:09I would see 95% from a shite.
16:11Yeah, yeah.
16:12Cos all the frig wants to throw the press.
16:16And one.
16:17I mean, it was stopped for a reason, wasn't it, this programme?
16:20You've got the power to DIY with over £1,000 worth of a Ryobi tool.
16:25I wouldn't mind that.
16:27You wouldn't mind that.
16:27Look at that.
16:29I could do a lot of damage with that.
16:30You could do lots of damage with that.
16:33In four.
16:34What else is there?
16:35You've got to roll with it with this pair of super smashing skates.
16:39No, I wouldn't mind a pair of them.
16:42Oh, they're nice.
16:43They're a bit of you.
16:44Brother, you've got a leotard that would go perfectly with that.
16:47Yeah.
16:48And for his special prize...
16:50Oh, is it a holiday?
16:52Tell me it's not Butlins.
16:53It's Butlins.
16:54It's Butlins.
16:54It's a family break, courtesy of Butlins.
16:58Butlins?
16:59Butlins!
17:01Butlins!
17:02Bad boys go to...
17:03Butlins!
17:05Keep out of the black and in the red.
17:07There's nothing in this game for...
17:09Cheers!
17:10Two in a bit!
17:12Huh?
17:12Take your time.
17:14Yeah, I didn't get that.
17:15We're all behind you.
17:16Up your step.
17:18Come on, guys.
17:19Come on, lads.
17:20Come on, boys.
17:20This is the dart.
17:21Oh, I see.
17:22Right.
17:25That's black.
17:26Oh, that's black.
17:27Straight in the black.
17:28That'll do.
17:29That's not good.
17:29He needs to be in the red.
17:31Black again.
17:32Oh, another one.
17:33What's wrong with those dots?
17:35See ya.
17:37I'm black.
17:37I'm lucky.
17:38I'm black again.
17:39Oh, no.
17:40Oh.
17:41Fucking hell.
17:42Is he the dart player?
17:43So, okay.
17:44Come on, Lee.
17:46Come on, Lee.
17:47You've got to do better than Zaya.
17:49Come on.
17:52Black.
17:52Black.
17:53Oh, shit.
17:54Oh, black.
17:55The red, Lee, the red.
17:58Black again.
17:59Black.
18:00No.
18:01Oh, no.
18:02It's not going well.
18:05Oh, stop it.
18:07Spec savers, please.
18:09Do you know what?
18:09He's got glasses on.
18:11Yeah, but they ain't working.
18:11I actually don't think we've ever seen this before.
18:14They've not won a single prize.
18:15How about the gold seed?
18:17Zaya, you've got the final three darts.
18:19Come on, then.
18:19Please get something.
18:22Black again.
18:23Black.
18:27Black again.
18:30Come on, Zaya.
18:31Oh, mate.
18:32It'd actually be hard to get black this many times.
18:36Oh, yeah.
18:36And black.
18:37Oh, my goodness.
18:39Oh, that snout.
18:41Oh, that's the first time I've ever seen that.
18:44I've still got to ask you a big question.
18:46Right.
18:47Do you want to risk nothing?
18:49Yeah.
18:51And take on one final challenge.
18:54Score one or one or more with six darts,
18:56and you leave here with Bully's Mystery Star Prize.
18:59Nah, to be honest with you,
19:01I want to go out and win nothing.
19:02I don't want to risk it Brad.
19:04Well, it's a no-brainer, isn't it?
19:05What would you do, Zaya?
19:07Lee, you're first to throw.
19:08Please step up to the hockey.
19:10For goodness sake.
19:11Come on, Lee.
19:12They've got to get something here, Simon.
19:14OK.
19:15Here we go.
19:16Come on, Lee.
19:17One hundred and one or more in six darts.
19:20One hundred and one or more in six darts.
19:22That's doable.
19:23You could do that with your eyes shut.
19:24No pressure.
19:26Or lots of pressure.
19:29Seven.
19:29Seven.
19:30That's a good step up for him.
19:31I like to get the seven out of the way early doors.
19:35Set me up nicely for a treble 20.
19:39God, five.
19:40Five!
19:42No, they're hopeless.
19:43That's 12.
19:47And 19.
19:4819.
19:49Not bad.
19:50Yeah, if you get 70, they win.
19:52Is that possible?
19:53Yeah, because they could get a triple 20 and a 10.
19:56For Bully's mystery star prize.
19:59Come on, Zaya.
20:00This isn't hard as someone who played darts.
20:0420.
20:05Whoa!
20:0520.
20:06Come on, boy.
20:0920.
20:10Yeah!
20:10Oh, nice!
20:11We're doing all right here.
20:13It's all on the last dart, so...
20:14Oh!
20:16Oh, no.
20:19Oh, he's fucked it.
20:20Oh, 72.
20:2172.
20:22Well done, lads.
20:23Oh, Reeve.
20:25Zaya.
20:26Oh, you tried.
20:28You tried, guys.
20:29I don't think they tried hard enough.
20:33I don't.
20:37In Derby.
20:39Theodore, look, I'm sitting with Anki Roz.
20:42Can you see him?
20:44Yeah.
20:44I'm special.
20:45And there's someone else very special here.
20:48Do you want to say hi?
20:50The Siddiquis.
20:51Ho, ho, ho.
20:52Have you been good this year, little man?
20:57That's not real, Santa.
20:59It's granddad.
21:01I know you want a snake for Christmas.
21:04I know what you want for Christmas.
21:07What do you think?
21:09You want a snake.
21:13No.
21:15He's fallen over.
21:17I don't need a...
21:18I don't...
21:19I don't want...
21:20Dad!
21:21Stop telling him!
21:22On Friday, there was a famous face doing some festive fiddling on ITV.
21:30Ooh, Sarah Davis, Christmas craft-off, Tom.
21:34Craft-off?
21:36Yes.
21:36Sarah Davis.
21:39Dragon Den blonde hair.
21:41Yes.
21:42Got you.
21:42Yeah, yeah, yeah.
21:43She's a massive crafty.
21:45Is she?
21:45Yes.
21:46It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
21:49Oh, I like her.
21:50I can't believe she's made that much money out of cardboard.
21:53Neither can I.
21:53I'm on a mission to spread a bit of homemade festive magic.
21:57Do you know what?
21:58You can't beat a bit of homemade festive magic.
22:00You can't.
22:01Nice little glue pipe.
22:02Wow.
22:03Oh, I love a sparkly pine cone.
22:05So grab your glue guns and let's get Christmas crafting.
22:09I need to get a bad man glue gun.
22:12That's what I need.
22:12Yeah.
22:13Real bad man glue gun.
22:14Real bad man glue gun.
22:15Mmm.
22:15Do you know what Christmas crafts equals?
22:23Christmas crap.
22:24Christmas crap, yeah.
22:26I thought, why not do a little Christmas scene in a glass?
22:29Oh, why not?
22:31That's what every glass needs at Christmas.
22:33Yes.
22:33Absolutely.
22:34A what?
22:35Christmas scene in a glass.
22:37I like fucking vodka in my glass.
22:39Yeah, I do.
22:39Or a nice white.
22:40That's the only thing I like in my glass.
22:41Or a nice Pinot Grisio.
22:43This is a really fun treat and super easy.
22:46I don't have a spare glass.
22:47Look how the other half live, honestly.
22:49How do you do a Christmas scene in a glass?
22:52And what is the point of a Christmas scene in a glass?
22:54Well, just to be festive.
22:56All I'm going to use, a little bit of rosemary.
22:58Okay.
22:59Got that in the garden.
23:00We do have that in the garden.
23:01Grows all year.
23:03Abundance of rosemary.
23:04Some pomegranate seeds.
23:05Pomegranate seeds?
23:06Come on.
23:07Okay.
23:08We're going to freeze it ready.
23:10Oh, what?
23:10Okay.
23:11What's she doing here, man?
23:12I want to know where this is going here.
23:14In the freezer.
23:18Now, this is the low-tech tape.
23:21What tape?
23:22Low-tech.
23:23Low-tech.
23:25She's a bit blue petri, isn't she?
23:27I had no idea she was into this type of stuff.
23:30It is going to hold our little miniature Christmas tree in place.
23:34A miniature Christmas tree?
23:36Yeah.
23:36That's what she's doing with the rosemary.
23:39Oh.
23:39That's going to be the miniature Christmas tree.
23:42And then you see that will be held just nicely in the glass.
23:47Lovely.
23:48And the best thing about that size of using rosemary is you will have your eye out when you're having a drink.
23:54I think she's showing you how to make a cannabis farm.
23:56So, I'm going to start off just with a little bit of water, because it's going to be going into the freezer.
24:01Oh, yeah.
24:02What is this?
24:03It's a Christmas scene in a glass.
24:09I should end up with frozen peas and sweet corn in as well.
24:12A mix, a country mix.
24:14I won't even get one glass in my freezer.
24:15I can't even get the ice cubes in, man.
24:18And then you just need to take the washy tape off.
24:21OK.
24:21Take the tape off.
24:22Let's have a look.
24:23And what you'll see is a twig.
24:26It is.
24:27That Christmas tree will have frozen perfectly into place.
24:34Lovely.
24:35Lovely.
24:36Lovely.
24:37Lovely.
24:38Lovely.
24:39Lovely.
24:40Lovely.
24:41Lovely.
24:42Right.
24:43I don't even know what to make of it.
24:44I'm so...
24:45Like, I'm lost for words.
24:46It looks dead.
24:48I'm just adding tonic water to these.
24:50Here we go.
24:51Oh, now she's talking.
24:52Can I have coke in mine instead?
24:54She can't even see it.
24:55With rosemary.
24:56Oh, I'll have a rosemary and coke, please.
25:00Oh...
25:01You're going to love them.
25:03Oh, come on.
25:05Get something harder in there.
25:06Where's the gin?
25:08Yeah.
25:09Where's the vodka?
25:10Well, at least you should try, didn't it?
25:13That's all that matters.
25:14Like, at least you tried.
25:24In Leeds.
25:25I'm going to a Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow.
25:27Yes, I'd heard about this.
25:29Yeah, so I'm going to an actual American's house.
25:32For an actual Thanksgiving dinner.
25:35Lucky you.
25:36Sisters Ellie and Izzy.
25:38Do you know what's it like?
25:39I feel really grown up and mature to be invited to a Thanksgiving dinner party.
25:44I know.
25:45I've been invited to a dinner party.
25:49Tell me you're old without telling me that you're old.
25:51Me and Nat are going to a dinner party.
25:54We've actually never been to a dinner party.
25:56That's because none of your friends are sophisticated or host dinner parties.
26:00You've just made friends with Neil and Hannah and they so happen to be normal human beings.
26:05On Monday, fallout from the budget was still bubbling along on BBC News.
26:14I'm guessing it will be the trouble they're in because they didn't tell the cabinet they had a budget surplus notified by the OBR when they were saying they had a £20 billion black hole.
26:26Have you had your advent calendar this morning?
26:28No, I haven't.
26:29I've had a coffee, wouldn't I?
26:31Pinch, punch, first of the month, no returns.
26:33Good afternoon.
26:34Welcome to the BBC News at One, our main story.
26:37The Prime Minister has insisted...
26:39Oh, he looks a bit alarmed there, York here.
26:41He looks bewildered, doesn't he?
26:43Yeah.
26:44..that his Chancellor, Rachel Reeves, did not mislead the public before last week's budget.
26:48That's not what I've heard.
26:50Have you been following this?
26:51Yes, yes, she exaggerated the so-called fiscal black hole.
26:56Cabinet members have reportedly accused him and Ms Reeves of misleading ministers.
27:01Yep, I'd have to agree with that.
27:03Didn't mislead them, they just kept some information back, which helped with what she was doing.
27:09Rachel Reeves has defended her position, saying full details contained in her budget are never provided in advance.
27:15Pretty big detail to not release, though.
27:18You know, she doesn't release all the details, just the ones that she wants you to hear.
27:22We now know that on October 31st, the Office for Budget Responsibility told Rachel Reeves
27:27that she still had a surplus of £4.2 billion.
27:31What?!
27:33So the economy's doing better than we all thought?
27:35She was telling everybody we were £20 or £30 billion down and she was £4.2 billion up.
27:40This is like what happened with Nana's energy bills.
27:43Yeah.
27:45Giving a speech in London, the Prime Minister said there had been no misleading.
27:49Well, of course he would say that.
27:51We had on the one hand £16 billion less than we might otherwise have had.
27:54We had clear commitments that we'd made throughout the process as to what it was we were going to achieve.
28:00Oh, God, it's so boring.
28:02Yeah, I've checked out now.
28:04It was inevitable that we would always have to raise revenue.
28:08What is that noise? That horn noise?
28:12It's not air raid, is it?
28:13The Tories have asked the financial regulator to investigate Rachel Reeves.
28:17What? I mean, what's going to happen? They're going to do an investigation.
28:20It's going to take nine years. They're going to be out of power and no-one's going to care.
28:24A CEO who did what Rachel Reeves did would have had to resign.
28:28You tell him, Kemi.
28:29And she should be held to the same high standards. She's the Chancellor of the Exchequer. She's not a PR lady.
28:34Kemi's just happy to get her neb on telly.
28:37Oh, God, yeah. Just to stay relevant.
28:39I mean, fair play to her, she didn't pull a quasi-quartang.
28:42Yeah, yeah.
28:44You know, she has got that on her side.
28:47Yeah.
28:48Nobody's beat quasi-quartang yet.
28:51In Yorkshire...
28:54What makes someone beautiful and what makes someone pretty? It's just an interesting concept.
28:58Sarah and her daughter-in-law, Lara.
29:01Well, my sister was beautiful and I was just pretty, okay?
29:07So what am I?
29:09You're...
29:10Why did I ask that? Why did I ask that?
29:13You are pretty, I suppose. Attractive, beautiful. I don't know what you are, darling, what you think you are.
29:19What?
29:22On Saturday night, Alan Carr took us back in time on ITV.
29:27I feel like I get really stuck in the 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s.
29:31I don't know the difference between them all.
29:33What was going on in the 80s?
29:35Well, with me?
29:36Well, I was fully out then, wasn't I? So it was all fun.
29:39Well, that wasn't at all.
29:40I don't want to know what was going on in the 80s with you then.
29:42No, no, no.
29:43He does a young Alan Carr so well, that boy.
29:50Never mind changing ends, you can't change bloody channels for Alan Carr.
29:56Nothing united the UK more than a telephone.
30:02What's a telephone?
30:03We've got telephones now.
30:05Oh, that's a telephone.
30:06Everyone used to sit in baths with baked beans, didn't they?
30:09What the fuck?
30:11Even celebrities came down from their ivory towers to show us they were just like us.
30:16Oh, they need to bring out back things like this.
30:19This is proper telly.
30:21Not like the shite we have to watch now.
30:23Oh, and you ain't got a few tins of beans if you were in a right state.
30:28She's the annoying neighbour over at road, isn't she?
30:31She's the snobby neighbour who's always looking down her nose at Alan's mum.
30:35If your cupboards are bare, you can always send the boys to me for a feed.
30:39So, right, ate his hair, cut that one, innit?
30:42Yeah, I had that hair, don't you remember?
30:44Yeah, but yours looks like an explosion in a mattress factory.
30:46Mouth lovely, I ain't real good hair.
30:47We're just doing a bath of beans for charity.
30:49Well, we're trying, we're about 20 tins short.
30:50That's why we're here.
30:52Charlie's doing a camp out Saturday.
30:53Yeah, it was a bit mad, wasn't it, back in the day?
30:56It was constantly something.
30:57You was getting sponsored for something all the time.
31:00He's having a camp out.
31:01Load of mates coming round.
31:03What about Alan?
31:04Ask Alan to go.
31:06Oh, which mate?
31:07Michael Godgin.
31:08Bradley.
31:09Who else?
31:10Jake.
31:11Oh, Jake.
31:12Oh, Jake.
31:13He likes Jake, doesn't he, Alan?
31:14Oh, he likes Jake, yeah.
31:15He'll be there, Alan.
31:16Bunny.
31:17Maybe Alan could camp out, instead of the beans.
31:19Oh, but that's very...
31:20You'd like that?
31:21Look at his little face.
31:22It's lit up there, didn't it?
31:24Oh, yes, please.
31:25I'll camp out with those boys.
31:27Oh, no.
31:28Not with Charlie.
31:29He's done enough of charity already.
31:31Oh, he doesn't want Alan to come.
31:34No.
31:35After setting up camp with his friend Kay, Alan was keen to see what Jake and the lads were
31:40up to in the other garden.
31:42Get yourself in the tent there.
31:45Go on, Alan.
31:46Get in.
31:47Oh!
31:48Oh!
31:49Oh!
31:50Oh!
31:51Oh, my God.
31:52He's in with all the boys now.
31:54Hi.
31:55Hello.
31:56That's what you're like when you flap onto someone.
32:00Oh, no.
32:01That's why I'm single, babe.
32:02Jake.
32:03Good timing.
32:04Oh, there's Jake.
32:05Oh, yup.
32:06He's very happy.
32:07Let's do something else, eh?
32:08No.
32:09George's turn.
32:10No, this is a dangerous game, man.
32:11Oh, my God.
32:12Never have I ever done fourth base.
32:16What is fourth base?
32:18One, two, three.
32:21Not round the back.
32:22I don't think it's round the back.
32:24Barely even fifteen.
32:25I'm sure Alan can help you, Georgie.
32:27Don't worry, Al.
32:29It's just a game, innit?
32:30Oh, poor Alan.
32:31This is a horrible situation to be in.
32:34I'm bored of this now.
32:35Come on.
32:36Go on, Jake.
32:37Stick it up for Alan, yeah?
32:38Never change, Alan.
32:39Hello, happy campers.
32:41Oh!
32:42Did you see that look?
32:43He told him never change.
32:45Hmm.
32:46Alan, you've left poor Kay on her own.
32:48Out.
32:49Kay, you grass.
32:50I mean...
32:51Absolute part of pooper.
32:52Give me that.
32:53Right, all of you, out.
32:55Now.
32:56Come on.
32:57Oh, they've been caught.
32:58Bottle of whiskey snatched.
33:00Oh, come on.
33:01Georgie.
33:02Oh!
33:03Oh!
33:04Oh!
33:05Oh, Alan giving Jake the eye.
33:06Sorry, you can't believe this.
33:07You have no idea what's going on in your back garden.
33:09You've got to keep it in a...
33:11Oh!
33:12Oh!
33:13Oh!
33:14Oh, my God, Alan.
33:16Oh, anyway.
33:17No.
33:19Thank you very much.
33:20Oh!
33:21Oh!
33:22Jake and Georgie are snogging!
33:25Georgie's snogging.
33:30It's tough, Alan.
33:32Who does that on the drive, though?
33:33Yeah, why are two kids necking on?
33:36I really thought that I had a chance.
33:39She just wasn't the one, darling.
33:41Oh, Mum just got the wrong idea.
33:44I wasn't talking about Georgie.
33:46Yeah, we know.
33:47We know, Alan.
33:48I know.
33:50Oh!
33:51Oh, what a good friend.
33:53I mean, these days, you'd be pleased to have a gay son, wouldn't you?
33:56Oh, God, yeah, I'm hoping.
33:57Do I tell you what I used to like one time?
34:00Was Debbie Addy.
34:02Was it?
34:03Aye, but that's not somebody in school, is it?
34:06I can't think of anybody in school.
34:08I used to fancy the window cleaner in school.
34:11Oh, the window cleaner?
34:15Yeah, I did end up going out with him.
34:17Oh.
34:23In Blackpool.
34:27Tell you what, the kids are getting all excited for Christmas, aren't they?
34:30Yeah.
34:30Pete and his little sister, Sophie.
34:33When they were round here the other day,
34:36Jimmy was saying,
34:37we've got a Christmas tree.
34:39I said, oh.
34:39I said, me and Uncle Ben have put ours up in the other lounge.
34:44Begging me to see it, like, obviously.
34:46I said, yeah, come on then, let's go.
34:47And I've put, I've had made two little stockings,
34:53one for Ben, one for me, hung on the fire.
34:56Lovely touch.
34:58Match all the colour scheme.
35:00Jimmy takes one look at him and goes,
35:02why have you got two big stinking socks?
35:06I was like, they're not stinking socks, Jimmy.
35:09This week, we were all on the edge of our seats
35:14as we waited to find out who was to blame for what on Skye.
35:18Oh, you know what this is, Lev?
35:20What?
35:20Don't blame her, no.
35:22Don't blame her?
35:23It's not that, and it's all her fault.
35:26Oh, I thought it was...
35:27I thought it was don't blame her.
35:32So what's happened?
35:33What have I missed?
35:34So, at the start,
35:36child gets kidnapped by a nanny,
35:38not his own nanny,
35:39another nanny who's got a special interest in him.
35:42She was called Carrie,
35:43as it happens, now called Josephine.
35:45Child's now been reunited with his family.
35:48However, we don't know why.
35:50We don't know why it's all happened.
35:53In the programme,
35:54they had a flashback to show us how it all started.
36:01Oh, Olivia, Josie had a baby six years ago.
36:04If Josie had a baby,
36:05why did she need to steal someone else's?
36:10Oh, look how happy she is, Leigh.
36:12She's sucking him on.
36:16Come around!
36:17Oh, you fuggers!
36:18Oh, fucking hell!
36:20Oh, bloody hell!
36:23Sheets!
36:24Oh, now, who is in that car?
36:26Is that the mum and the dad of, um, Milo?
36:30No.
36:31No.
36:33No, I heard him.
36:34Oh, no.
36:36Josie's in hospital.
36:38Yeah, but what's happening to the baby?
36:40He was crying.
36:41I'm sorry.
36:42He didn't survive the crash.
36:44Oh, no.
36:45What's she saying?
36:45She heard the baby crying?
36:47Yeah, she said she heard him.
36:48I think that you're confused.
36:50That must have been the other baby.
36:51What?
36:52The other baby.
36:54What other baby?
36:55In the other car.
36:56Are we still six years ago, or are we real now?
37:04Real now.
37:05Does the name Josephine Murphy mean anything to you?
37:08Uh-oh!
37:08Uh-oh!
37:09Josie, what are you doing with a gun?
37:10What are you doing?
37:11Mr. Irvine.
37:14He's my son.
37:16What do you mean he's your son?
37:17Her son died in the car accident.
37:19My name is Josephine Murphy.
37:23What?
37:24No, don't you?
37:25They recognise the name.
37:26No, you, you, you, you died.
37:29I didn't.
37:30What?
37:30She died?
37:31They said she died.
37:32Why, did they think she died then?
37:35I didn't come here to try to get him back.
37:37Well, what have you come here for then?
37:38I came here because I need you to promise me.
37:41What?
37:41Mother to mother.
37:43That you'll protect Milo.
37:44I am so confused.
37:46I thought she's the buddy.
37:47She didn't sound like a buddy.
37:48No.
37:48From, from what?
37:50From him.
37:51Him.
37:52Oh, why?
37:54What's he doing?
37:54You don't know what he's capable of.
37:56Oh my God, look at his face.
37:58He's like, no, please don't, please don't expose me.
38:01What are you hiding?
38:02I know you won't believe me if I tell you,
38:04which is why you have to hear it for yourself.
38:06Shut up.
38:07She's got evidence.
38:08Oh my God.
38:09No.
38:10He did it.
38:10I don't know.
38:12Oh, no.
38:14He's shot her.
38:15He did not deliberately them.
38:17Okay.
38:17He done something, hasn't he?
38:22She had the evidence there.
38:24Yeah.
38:24Peter, whose baby died in that accident?
38:29Their baby died, and he took...
38:33Hers.
38:33Josie's baby.
38:35Yeah.
38:37He was scared and he was cold, but I couldn't, I couldn't just leave him there.
38:40No, no, no, no, no, no.
38:42So Marlowe is, is Josie's baby?
38:44Poor old Josie has been in the right all along.
38:47You stole her child.
38:49No, I did, I did what I thought was right.
38:52I stole a child, mate.
38:53No matter which way you look at it or cut it down, you still stole somebody's child.
38:59All this time I thought the kidnapping was my fault and you let me think it was my fault,
39:02but it was not my fault, it was yours.
39:03Yeah, it did, didn't I?
39:05Change the title, it's all his fault, it's not all her fault.
39:08We knew it'd never be her fault, it's always got to be a man's fault.
39:12A bit later, it looked like Marissa had forgiven her husband, Peter.
39:22Why's she being nice to him?
39:24Oh, I couldn't kiss him.
39:26Knowing what she knows, I couldn't.
39:28What's the hand for?
39:31Er, I've missed you.
39:33What were that for?
39:34Nat says that when I snog in, thinks that I'm up to some of it.
39:37Yeah, I missed you too.
39:40Peter, never trust the redhead, mate.
39:44Your own thin ice there.
39:50What's she coughing for?
39:51What's he doing?
39:51Oh, what's wrong?
39:52That's how Mal reacts when I kiss her.
39:55Oh, shit.
39:56Er, I didn't check all the allergens.
39:59Oh, she's had some on her lips.
40:00Yeah, she's kissed him.
40:02A deadly kiss, Simon.
40:03I could have had to away my accident.
40:05Fuck, I'm so sorry.
40:06No, I gotta...
40:06Have you got your EpiPen, Andy, love?
40:09I hope not.
40:12It's like an immediate reaction.
40:15What the fuck?
40:18It's expired.
40:19What?
40:20Oh, shit.
40:21It's not working.
40:22It's expired!
40:22You always have the emergency kit.
40:29You know, it's worked out.
40:30That's true.
40:32I manage your allergy for you.
40:33Oh!
40:35Ray between the lines, I managed your allergy for you.
40:38Amira, remember when you had to use an EpiPen because you had some Parmesan?
40:41I remember some Parmesan.
40:44Don't make it sound so minuscule.
40:47Like, I had to be rushed into his hospital.
40:50I remember that was the funniest day ever.
40:52Do you remember, though, when you were, like, when we called the ambulance and they were like,
40:57who's going to come with her?
40:59And none of you wanted to volunteer.
41:01You were like, oh, I've got to work the next day.
41:03I don't know how long we're going to be there.
41:04I'm like, you don't know what could have happened to me.
41:07My lips are huge.
41:08They look like Kylie Jenner's lips, Rob.
41:12In Glasgow.
41:14We're at Christmas parties.
41:15The worst part about them is, like, yeah, it's that not knowing where the line is.
41:18There's a clear line, mate.
41:19Don't cross it.
41:20Best mates Jake and Callum.
41:22I don't really drink that much.
41:23It doesn't, like, I never really get to that place.
41:26Never do.
41:26But I've been to some wild Christmas parties where you're just like,
41:30Anne from Accounts does not do that on a Monday morning.
41:32It's almost like a superhero, right?
41:33They come out, they show you their true powers,
41:36and on the Monday you're like, all right?
41:37Yeah, back to normal.
41:39Back to your spreadsheet.
41:40That's magical.
41:41Snash.
41:42You know what I mean?
41:42So we glimmer into someone's action.
41:43It's a glimmer in, and you go, I know I like you,
41:46but we don't need to talk about it.
41:47Yeah.
41:48This week, Strictly had something new in store for us on BBC One.
41:52Ready for Strictly?
41:54Ha-ha!
41:55Are you ready?
41:55Oh, good catch.
41:57Nice.
41:58Shall we watch Strictly, and at least there'll be some athletic gaiety?
42:03Da-da-da-da-da-da-da!
42:09Da-da-da-da-da-da!
42:11Where's your bottom gone?
42:12Over there.
42:13You haven't brought it.
42:16Stuck, it's on the way to.
42:18Oh, God.
42:19Well, why's it come off?
42:22Because it's cheap plastic, that's why it's come off
42:24Hey, Soph, you look like Gloria
42:28No, you look like Derek that rickety race flies
42:31Welcome to Strading Gun Dancing
42:33We are back from Blackpool and back to business
42:36Bloody hell, how big's Tessie's hair this week?
42:39That blow-dried Envy Jane MacDonald
42:41Our couples have another chance to improve their position
42:45On the leaderboard when they take on instant dance
42:49Instant dance, this is new
42:51What do you mean an instant dance?
42:53You have to like dance now
42:54Yeah, that's exactly it
42:56All our couples will be asked to improvise a dance on the spot
42:59Oh my God, improv
43:00This is us
43:02Oh shit
43:03Improvisation
43:05Yeah
43:07They're starting to change it, Mary
43:09No, no
43:10I think the expression is change it up
43:12No
43:13Oh
43:13After being assigned their dancers and picking their own costumes
43:17Yes
43:18Trousers
43:21Trousers are good
43:22It's chaos, this
43:23What the freak's going on?
43:24It's a bit like it's a knockout, not here
43:26Yeah
43:27The dancers had just ten seconds to confer before taking to the dance floor
43:31No, no
43:32Like a squirrel
43:33Oh, she's talking him through it
43:38Yeah
43:38Right
43:38You do that
43:39Right, quick plan
43:40You do that
43:40You go over there
43:43Oh, look at him
43:48Oh, hello
43:48Just, yeah, yeah, just strip
43:50That'll confuse him
43:52I mean, they're just floating round the room at this stage
43:59He doesn't need to do anything
44:00He's just like
44:02As long as he does this, that
44:03If I just stay there, she'll lead me
44:05This is what sounds like
44:07When the girls cry
44:09Oh, it's on a lift
44:12Oh, God, he's a stronger on the floor
44:18Honestly, I could have done that
44:20They've done a couple of forward steps
44:22A couple of backward steps
44:23Side steps
44:24And then a main hoida on the floor
44:26We're our final couple
44:28And we're Nikita
44:30Making onto the floor
44:31I love how Nikita's come dressed as a car wash
44:335, 4, 3, 2, 1
44:38Shit
44:39You don't fuck him out
44:41You start anything like that
44:43And you'll be fine, innit?
44:44That's how I start doing my taxes
44:45I would need a good bit of warning
44:52If someone were going to toss me in the air like that
44:54With my legs open
44:55Because it wouldn't end well for them
44:56Oh, them ruffles are made for shimmying, aren't they?
45:01When in doubt, you shimmy in it
45:03When in doubt, you shimmy
45:04Oh, yeah
45:09That's the Shakira dance
45:14Yeah
45:16They are new
45:31Nailing this
45:32Yeah
45:33I've got a bit of Shakira going through them
45:35Forever
45:35Forever
45:36Forever
45:37Forever
45:38Oh, God
45:39The thing is, if all else fails
45:41Just fling your crotch in someone's face
45:42Listen, it works, clearly
45:44Do you want to like a whipping top?
45:49Oh, yes
45:50Very slick
45:52Oh
45:55Oh
45:56I think he just took a fault to the volleys
46:00We'll play that game at Christmas
46:01That'll be fun
46:02Instant dance
46:03Give that a whirl
46:04I've got to tell you
46:05I've not been that interested in Strictly
46:06Since Anne Whitacombe was used as a mop
46:09To clean the Strictly floor
46:10Yeah, man
46:10But this has definitely rekindled my interest in it
46:13And next Friday night
46:19Channel 4 is standing up to cancer live
46:22Catch all the fun and complete frolics from 7.30
46:25Including a stand-up to cancer gogglebox special
46:28A tense family dispute makes for a complex case
46:31True crime on Channel 4 with 24 hours in police custody
46:35New this Monday at 9
46:36Up next, given the past week already
46:39It's the last leg
46:40It's the last leg
46:41It's the last leg
46:42It's the last leg
46:43It's the last leg
46:44It's the last leg
46:45It's the last leg
46:46It's the last leg
46:47It's the last leg
46:48It's the last leg
46:49It's the last leg
46:50It's the last leg
46:51It's the last leg
46:52It's the last leg
46:53It's the last leg
46:54It's the last leg
46:55It's the last leg
46:56It's the last leg
46:57It's the last leg
46:58It's the last leg
46:59It's the last leg
47:00It's the last leg
47:01It's the last leg
47:02It's the last leg
47:03It's the last leg
47:04It's the last leg
47:05It's the last leg
47:06It's the last leg
Be the first to comment
Add your comment

Recommended