- 12 hours ago
Palm Royale - Season 2 Episode 8 -
Maxine Hits the Slopes
Maxine Hits the Slopes
Category
😹
FunTranscript
01:29Here she is, Mrs. Rawlins, freshly bathed for her journey.
01:35Thank you, Lottie.
01:36You've been incredibly kind.
01:38A mother at long last.
01:42Auf Wiedersehen, Penelope.
01:45May you have a blessed future.
01:59General Harrison's eggnog.
02:07Bourbon, neat, whole milk.
02:13Grootsy pals, that's hello in Switzerland.
02:16Grasshopper, Danka.
02:18Prepare to leave your Palm Beach worries at the door
02:23and become newer, better European versions of ourselves on the Continental Continent.
02:29Are you ready to capture Norma and throw her in a dark hole forever and ever, amen?
02:33What happened to leaving our troubles at the door?
02:35This isn't an ordinary trouble.
02:36This is a tripart mission.
02:38One, avenge my sister.
02:39Two, get you out of the basement of the FBI.
02:42And three, give you a lights-out explosive headline that's bound to win to a Pulitzer.
02:47Three stones.
02:48One, identity thieving, murderous.
02:50It is all rather thrilling.
02:52Maybe some time away might give me a fresh career perspective.
02:56Nothing like some alpine air and an international woman hunt to clear the mind.
03:02Evelyn, listen, I want...
03:04Oh, okay.
03:04I wanted to thank you as my conservatress for coming with me on this Swiss sojourn.
03:09I'm not coming abroad with you.
03:11I'm coming abroad with my gorgeous husband, right, darling?
03:14A perfect opportunity for a late honeymoon.
03:17Son, ski, me.
03:18It'll be nice to take a break from the stress of the business.
03:23What stress of the business?
03:25Oh, look.
03:26It's the incubator waddling in for a landing.
03:28Oh, everyone, clear the path.
03:30Make sure there's no tripping hazards here.
03:32VIP, very important passenger, coming through.
03:35Shut the fuck up, Maxine.
03:36Please, hold the sauce, sister.
03:38I'm just trying to help you out.
03:39Like when you played dead and haunted me?
03:42I could kill you.
03:43I really could.
03:43Are we about to have an incident?
03:46No.
03:46No incident.
03:47Because any incident you cause will be cause for ejection.
03:51As a decorated airman, you have my solemn aircrew vow that there will be no cause for ejection between my ex-wife and my wife.
03:59You?
04:00A pilot?
04:01Yes, ma'am.
04:02I proudly flew the Dallas-Cleveland-Atlanta route for 20 solid years.
04:06Oh, big ma.
04:08Yeah, big ma.
04:09Yeah, big ma.
04:11Good afternoon.
04:12Good afternoon, Rick ma.
04:13String pillows.
04:14Douglas, I think the air hostesses are making fun of you.
04:18Bula and Bula were big men too once.
04:23In the war.
04:24In the war, we were huge men.
04:27We were fighter pilots.
04:28Now we're back to doing women's work pushing vorm nuts.
04:32Only good part of every speech layover is taking Bula's plane for a spin.
04:37I dock it at our sister Sheila's chalet villa that rip.
04:44Where's the bathroom?
04:45In the rear.
04:46Ooh.
04:47Take your seats.
04:50Go ahead.
04:51Is there anything about me in there?
05:03What are you doing here?
05:04For your informazione, we are on a secret mission.
05:08Patch Post is threatening to spread a rumor that I'm Nixon's parable.
05:12And my only salvation from societal ruin is the dim hope that Axel has some bejeweled eggs stuffed in a safety deposit box.
05:21The Black Widow and her mustachioed man on an international gambit full of intrigue and jewels and scandal?
05:28Why you two are the Jenna and James Bond of Palm Beach?
05:31When you put it in those Maximian terms, that's a spirit.
05:36Let's take off!
05:37It's not my decision.
05:42It's not my decision.
07:11Give me a telecorp, Norma.
07:13In Switzerland, names are given, names are taken.
07:18And now, you have one of the most powerful, my son.
07:22Pardon me, ma'am.
07:30Oh.
07:30Is this seat taken?
07:32Where's Mitzi?
07:34Oh, she's in the bathroom again.
07:36That is quite a spiffy travel coat.
07:40Oh, yeah.
07:41The Delacorte ski jacket.
07:43I always wore it when I, uh...
07:45Went skiing?
07:47Yeah.
07:49It's kind of like old times, huh?
07:53You and me, up in the clouds.
07:55I can't stop thinking about you.
08:06Douglas, stop.
08:09I'm not gonna do to Mitzi what she did to me.
08:11Okay, here's what I'm thinking.
08:16Once the baby comes and we free up the money, then I'll divorce Mitzi.
08:21I'll put her up someplace really nice.
08:24And you and I can get remarried.
08:26And I'll be a father.
08:27And as long as you're okay with having someone else's kid in our life, then...
08:34We could have it all.
08:36Yeah.
08:37The money, the name, the house.
08:40Well, maybe not the house.
08:42Unless you want to shack up with a robber.
08:45Speaking of that...
08:48There's something I want to tell you.
08:52Gosh, how do I say this?
08:54Norma isn't Norma.
08:56Her real name is Agnes, and she's an imposter.
08:59So it's not really her house to give away in the first place.
09:01Hey, you're talking Swahili here, man.
09:03Okay, just focus on this.
09:04The house, the money, the fortune...
09:07All of it is...
09:08It's already yours.
09:12I'm sorry, I didn't tell you earlier.
09:14I just didn't...
09:14You didn't want me to squander away the money before you got your half.
09:19No.
09:19God, you know me so well.
09:21I do.
09:22Oh, no.
09:26Don't mind me.
09:31Gin and Tommy, please.
09:34What a nice watch, man.
09:36Evelyn got it for me.
09:37Oh.
09:38What was the occasion?
09:39She just loves me?
09:43Of course.
09:47I am sorry about the pickle the murder of my sister put the Pomeroyle in.
09:51That is the least of our worries.
09:55Have a seat.
10:00Worries, you say?
10:03Do tell.
10:03You and me are going to tête-à -tête.
10:16Tête-à -tête.
10:17It's French.
10:18For even though you have a bun in that oven, Douglas most certainly did not do the baking.
10:22In fact, I think a certain alligator wrangler's spermatazoa is multiplying in that tiny uterus of yours, even as we speak.
10:30Your French stinks.
10:31They say a picture speaks a thousand words.
10:35I'm a very popular face in Palm Beach.
10:38Lots of men have my picture.
10:39I see.
10:40And do you love lots of men in Palm Beach forever and ever?
10:46Either I blow the lid off this joint, or you give me half that baby money when the kid is born.
10:50I can't give you half the baby trust because Douglas already promised it to Maxine.
10:58Much to my chagrin.
11:00Chagrin?
11:00That's French for leave me the fuck alone.
11:02Well, come here often?
11:13Why the smug mug?
11:15Little birdie told me you might be having some problems with the old IRS.
11:18Well, it seems little birdies are in season because one just told me you're about to come into scads of money once Mitzi pops out her nugget.
11:25Yes.
11:25Well, your little birdie tweets truth.
11:27And maybe I could send some of those scads over to the IRS on your behalf.
11:34Out with the if I sniff.
11:36If your business becomes my business, we're partners at the Palm Royale.
11:42I do believe I have you by the balls, if that's the right saying.
11:46Fine.
11:47Well, it has to be different this time.
11:49No scheming or double dealing.
11:51No secrets.
11:52In that case, I may have accidentally...
11:58Stepped out on Eddie.
11:59I know.
11:59I saw the apology watch.
12:00What are you talking about?
12:01Evelyn, everyone in Palm Beach knows when someone gives their significant other a fancy piece of jewelry when it is not a birthday or a holiday, they are indeed saying I'm sorry without saying I'm sorry.
12:13I feel horrible even after giving him the watch.
12:17Take it from me.
12:19Be honest from the start and then move on.
12:22Look at me and Douglas.
12:23Not the best example.
12:25Just do it today.
12:28Please.
12:29Promise.
12:30Promise.
12:31Please, take your seats and strap in.
12:34Things are about to get a little boopy.
12:37Oh, dear.
12:43This hotel has a fascinating history.
12:46First it was a convent, and then it became the Fluganorgan, an all-girls boarding school, before converting to a wartime hospital.
12:52Oh, there's another chapter, Anne, don't forget.
12:54When Norma Delacorte, nay, Agnes Pusiewicz, it was boondoggled and hornswoggled.
13:00That's not what boondoggled me.
13:02What's your plan, gumshoe?
13:03You're going to storm the lobby and throw a butterfly net over her?
13:06No.
13:07It's kind of funny, huh?
13:08You all travel all the way to the other side of the world for a vacation, and you end up with the exact same people.
13:14That's just how rich people travel.
13:16It's a hurting instinct.
13:17You know, speak for yourself, I've never been to this hotel.
13:19It was Skeet and his first wife's special place.
13:22I never wanted to go, because I didn't want to be haunted by her ghost.
13:25Being haunted's no fun, right, Maxine?
13:27Mitzi, you really must let that go.
13:29Besides, it was Virginia's idea.
13:31Oh, hell no.
13:32I'm not a part of this.
13:34We all just need to move on.
13:36Well, you know what I'm looking forward to the most?
13:40Skiing.
13:41Oh, same here.
13:43We used to play a game at a boarding school called Bum Bum Rush, and we'd get silly on peppermint shops and race down the mountain in our skivvies.
13:52Oh, such a gasp.
13:56I'm right here, Dinah.
13:58There's no need to broadcast your skivvies.
14:00Listen, when we get to the premises, boys, you take all the luggage.
14:04Ladies, we'll fan out and look for Robert.
14:06He's the heart and soul of Palm Beach, and he's never done anything bad to any one of us.
14:11We need to bring our native son home.
14:13Agreed?
14:14All right.
14:14Put the pedal to the metal.
14:16We've got a bone to dump.
14:19Oh, my God!
14:20I'm here to go!
14:21I'm here to go!
14:22Oh, he's rolling!
14:24Oh, my God!
14:26Oh, the car!
14:30We've been expecting you.
14:42Welcome to the Fum.
14:44We found him.
14:45Robert.
14:46Maxine thought you'd be stuffed in a dungeon.
14:49Still on your manhunt.
14:50What are you planning to do?
14:52Throw a giant butterfly net over her?
14:55No.
14:56Of course, normally you would arrive because of the verification of the baby.
14:59She left a while ago.
15:02I'll be at the bar.
15:04Me too.
15:05She left this for you.
15:11Maxine, by the time you read this, I'll be long gone.
15:16One step ahead of you, as always.
15:19Please enjoy the skiing, hot buttered beer, and our famous urban hemiflugens.
15:26Swiss kidney chowder.
15:28From my gap year in Leipzig.
15:31Norma was always a fabulous host.
15:34My son, Robert, will see to your every maid.
15:42Son?
15:43Norma was pregnant.
15:47Norma adopted me.
15:49I am now a Delacorte.
15:51Officially.
15:51Is this because you and I had a fight?
15:55Maxine, not everything is about you.
15:57I'm just trying to find a peaceful life.
15:59Norma's not even Norma, you know.
16:01So all of it, the life, the Delacorte mansion, it's not yours.
16:06In fact, it's Douglas's.
16:08Prove it.
16:15You bet your bottom dollar I'm going to prove it.
16:21Her bellwoman Lottie will assist you from here on.
16:23Lottie?
16:24Oh, God.
16:28Auf Wiedersehen.
16:30Oh, that means goodbye.
16:34Lottie, is it?
16:36Um, would you mind directing us to the bank?
16:38Of course.
16:39You just hop on the gondola, take it all the way to the tippy-tap of the mountain, just above the Hall of Delacorte.
16:47See, the whole hall.
16:48Well, jerks.
16:49Yes, hi, hi, hi.
16:52I was wondering if the honeymoon suite might be available.
16:56We're at capacity due to Frampus weekend.
16:59What the hell is Frampus weekend?
17:02Well, Frampus was Crampus' mistress.
17:04Who's Crampus?
17:06Our Santa Claus, demonic rat bastard.
17:10Frampus was Mr. and Mrs. Crampus' maid.
17:14When Mrs. Crampus found out that she was stopping her husband, she threw her into the fireplace and burned her for being a conniving, lying, adulterous...
17:32I believe that's yours.
17:33No, it's yours.
17:34Vich.
17:35Give it to me.
17:36Ladies, new plan.
17:39We have to prove that Norma is not Norma.
17:41What?
17:42Find Norma bones?
17:43I don't know.
17:44Just start digging.
17:45I'm not digging for some decades-old identity theft.
17:48This is not going to help my career.
17:49Excuse me.
17:50Sorry if I don't have a bunch of Russian moles scurrying around.
17:53This is the best we got.
17:54What Russian mole?
17:55Seriously?
17:56Sorry.
17:57Nothing.
17:59Virginia, is this true?
18:01Hey, Max, come on.
18:01It's time to get to the bank.
18:02Okay, just nose around, see what you can sniff out.
18:06Mitzi!
18:07Tick-tock!
18:08We gotta go to the bank.
18:10I'll be there in a minute.
18:11I just need to call my doctor.
18:13Wind from south, 40 knots.
18:16Big storm brinks tomorrow.
18:18Let me guess.
18:19Wringing your alligator sommelier?
18:21No.
18:22Get on the gondola, bitch.
18:25Evelyn!
18:27Ready to hit the slopes?
18:29Ashley, I thought we could do some whore broom decorating.
18:33I'm sorry.
18:33I'm positive I misheard you.
18:35Whore broom decorating?
18:37The locals celebrate Frampus weekend by decorating brooms like women and burning them.
18:41Could be fun.
18:44So fun.
18:44What an asshole.
18:50Now I'm a guest in his hotel?
18:52Well, he has the stones to steal my house.
18:55Our house.
18:56We'll get it back.
18:57We just have to prove Norma isn't Norma.
18:59That crazy old crackerjack.
19:01Can't believe she offed her roommate.
19:04Don't call her crazy, Perry.
19:05That is just a label society puts on women.
19:09Exhibit A, Frampus.
19:11Exhibit B, me.
19:13Match pose threatening me with her smear campaign.
19:17We should just cut, babe.
19:19Head for the hills.
19:20Become Swiss snow people.
19:22Oh.
19:23But what about the children?
19:27Oh, right.
19:29The boarding school is awfully close.
19:33Austria, then.
19:34I'm sorry.
19:35You have children?
19:37I have four.
19:39Oh.
19:39I'm not the father.
19:41That's husband number one.
19:43But I do like to think of them as my own.
19:47For two days every other year.
19:49Bless my babies.
19:51Oh, look, I think I see the bank.
19:53Where?
19:53Look, on the top of the mountain.
19:56Oh, you would think after so many years,
20:00I would get used to the altitude,
20:01but I swear it is still a real knob gobbler.
20:05Were you here when this was a boarding school?
20:07Before that, Toots.
20:09Do you happen to remember Norma Delacorte by any chance?
20:12Oh, yes, Norma.
20:14Of course.
20:16A real spitfire.
20:17It's a shame she had to leave after her father died,
20:21but as is our good fortune,
20:23she has been our benefactress ever since.
20:26She loved her alma mater.
20:28What about a little girl named Agnes?
20:32I don't remember her.
20:36You know what you really should do?
20:39What's that?
20:40Ask me about me.
20:41I have had a very interesting life,
20:44but all anybody cares about are the young patooties.
20:48Did you know that I used to be a nun?
20:51I know.
20:52Hard to think of a sexual muffin like me
20:55hiding all of my bushels.
20:56I was a hot-to-truck girl.
21:00So, they stuck me in a convent.
21:04Nothing more frightening than a sexual woman.
21:08You two understand.
21:10How long you been together?
21:12Oh.
21:12Oh, we're just work colleagues.
21:14I'd like us to be equal partners,
21:16but one of us won't let the other one in on her top secret secrets.
21:20Sure.
21:21Partners.
21:21Is that the word now?
21:24I'm a Catholic.
21:25We love euphemisms.
21:28Oh, look, there's Frampus.
21:30Fine-looking woman, eh?
21:32Her face looks like it's falling off.
21:35Well, what do you expect?
21:36Her boss threw her into the fire.
21:45Something in the buttermilk ain't clean.
21:51Hello?
22:03Hello?
22:05Maybe they're closed.
22:07Hello?
22:08Sorry about the wait.
22:11Only one man on deck.
22:14Me.
22:15Borg.
22:16Everyone else took off for the Frampus weekend.
22:18Yes, we've heard.
22:20Are you all going to the whorebroom burning tonight?
22:23Yours truly is master of ceremonies.
22:26I'm sorry.
22:28From down here, you are the spitting image of...
22:32My brother, Benny.
22:34You're Benny Barnhill's twin brother.
22:37We're a mirror image identical.
22:40Twins?
22:41I'm a twin.
22:42Oh, gosh, isn't it wonderful?
22:43It's like two hearts beating as one.
22:45I haven't talked to that arshlock in 40 years.
22:49Oh.
22:51Hello, Dinah Donahue.
22:53My fiancé, Axel Rosenhips, is recently deceased,
22:57and we would like to visit his safety deposit box.
23:00Righty-o.
23:01And let me guess,
23:03the rest of you are here for the baby verification, right?
23:08Looks good.
23:09She's pregnant.
23:11Oh.
23:12That's it?
23:13Oh, no, of course not.
23:15Safety deposit boxes are upstairs.
23:18Everybody else, join me at my big desk.
23:23What?
23:24Big desk.
23:25Oh.
23:26Oh.
23:26Oh.
23:26That's for that desk.
23:28Yeah, yeah, yeah.
23:31Nine, nine, nine.
23:33Okay.
23:35So, it looks like we just need the signature of the ex-wife
23:40so that she can release her claim on the funds,
23:42and then we can, as you are there, I can say,
23:45get the zygin on the road.
23:47Okay, that's me.
23:49Hello, ex-wife.
23:50Ready to sign.
23:51Belt certificate.
23:52Oh, yes.
23:53There you go.
23:54No grandparents, no parents, no kids.
23:56Dead twin.
23:57Oh.
23:58Oh.
23:58Uh, there is no Maxine Horton on the claim.
24:03We need the signature of Penelope Rawlins.
24:10What?
24:11Why?
24:12We were never married, only engaged.
24:15Well, her name was at the desk of beneficiary,
24:18yet some apparent.
24:20Okay.
24:20A moment of truth.
24:22Huh?
24:27Nothing.
24:31Nothing?
24:32And I assume you need her signature
24:34before you can release the funds, correct?
24:37That is correct.
24:38Unless all parties have signed by midnight
24:41on the hundredth year of the trust's endowment,
24:44it becomes the property of the Swiss government.
24:47Oh, God.
24:49Oh, God.
24:49I'm going to have the worst reputation in Palm Beach
24:52for centuries.
24:54Oh, my God.
24:55I'm certain I'm going to certainly regret asking this,
24:57but when is that hundredth anniversary?
25:01Tomorrow.
25:03Yes.
25:04Tomorrow.
25:05There you go.
25:06Wait, wait, wait, wait.
25:10What?
25:11Sometimes I wake in the dead of night
25:13to see Agnes staring at me.
25:17I swear she's planning something horrid.
25:21So this means none of us get any money?
25:30This was all for nothing.
25:31Not nothing.
25:33But not $82 million.
25:35No, no, no.
25:36Let me think.
25:37So Linda is still in Poland,
25:41currently on tour with the Bolshoi Ballet.
25:50Ladies.
25:53Hello.
25:54I was wondering if your plane happened to be nearby.
25:57Of course.
25:59Um, would you mind if my ex-husband borrowed it
26:02to perform an act of economic heroism?
26:05I'm not letting Mr. Big Steve take off on my string head.
26:12What you need?
26:15It's a very, very dangerous mission.
26:18It would require courage
26:21and death-define female bravery.
26:25Go on.
26:27You would need to fly behind the Iron Curtain
26:29to extract a woman who is being forced
26:31to wash dance belts against her will.
26:35Yes?
26:40Is that a yes?
26:41Oh, thank you very much, indeed.
26:56Mm-hmm.
26:57There.
26:59All done.
27:01Who does that look like?
27:04Me?
27:04Mamie Eisenhower.
27:06I'm in desperate need of another cocktail.
27:10Would you mind?
27:12For me?
27:20Hello?
27:21Urgent news.
27:22I don't have to sign the baby papers.
27:24Linda does.
27:25Fuck a duck.
27:26No, no, you can keep that pala virgin.
27:28I solved it.
27:29I sent the two Swedish stews over to Poland to fetch her,
27:32and she'll be here by morn.
27:33Wait a minute.
27:34You mean to tell me you knew where she was this whole time?
27:37I know.
27:38I'm sorry.
27:39It was a secret that I was keeping before we made our pact.
27:42Listen, she's going to get here and sign the paper.
27:45Fudge.
27:46I just realized I had to show my birth certificate.
27:49How are we going to prove that Linda is who we say she is?
27:52Well, Linda was born here.
27:54There's got to be a record of it somewhere.
27:56I'll talk to that old Lottie coot.
27:58Good thinking, pal.
28:00Have you told Eddie yet?
28:07The watch will have to suffice.
28:09Well, if it makes you feel any better,
28:11I have been contemplating having an affair with my ex-husband.
28:14You cannot do that, Maxine.
28:17Well, why?
28:19Because if Mitzi finds out, she'll divorce him,
28:21and then no one gets any money?
28:23Yes.
28:24And also, it's bad.
28:26Bad things come from bad things.
28:28Look at Frampus.
28:29It's true.
28:30Oh, I don't know what I was thinking.
28:32And he's about to have a child with another woman.
28:36Would it change things if he wasn't, um,
28:40having a child with a...
28:42another woman?
28:43Of course.
28:46I'm happy for him, I guess.
28:49In some way.
28:50I don't know.
28:51It's complicated.
28:53Yes, it is.
28:55Just do what I say,
28:56and do not have sex, Maxine.
28:58I mean it.
29:03Your drink, my lady.
29:05Oh, I'm so sorry, darling.
29:07I'm going to have to take it on the run.
29:09I've got pressing business to attend to
29:10regarding our future,
29:11but you enjoy yourself.
29:12What?
29:18What about our horror brooms?
29:20I don't understand.
29:21How did Evelyn get my picture?
29:23She found it in my wallet,
29:25which fell out of my pants
29:26because I was having sex with her.
29:28You had sex with Evelyn?
29:30Hey, I'm just doing
29:31what I have to do.
29:34I'm fucking playing dress up
29:35with a fucking crazy lady
29:37who thinks I'm a ghost.
29:38I'm doing my part.
29:39You do yours.
29:40I'm having a baby.
29:43Is that not sufficient, Jed?
29:45Kill Evelyn.
29:47I can't do that.
29:49I'm pregnant.
29:51Oh, bootlegger.
29:52Legger, I'm ready for my bubble bath.
29:56Do what I said or don't come home.
29:59We weren't supposed to hurt people.
30:11Carole!
30:11Crosshopper to go, my good salaud.
30:18Oh, stag brother,
30:23prepare to reclaim your birthright.
30:28James and Jenna Bond,
30:30have your proof.
30:32The real Norma wrote my Axel
30:35all about her creepy roommate, Agnes,
30:37who, guess what,
30:39was plotting something horrid.
30:42I knew it.
30:43Oh, I did it.
30:44I saved the day.
30:46Actually, we did.
30:47Hit the slopes.
30:50Good luck.
30:52Dearest Axel,
30:53Agnes is at it again,
30:55and she's always lurking in the shadows
30:57like some sort of ghost.
30:59She's usually quite peculiar.
31:02In many ways, her behavior has taken a turn
31:04that is more unsettling.
31:06I do not know what to do.
31:08Oh!
31:10What a beautiful day, man.
31:12Incredible.
31:14You should take a trip down the bunny slope.
31:15Putter is sublime.
31:17What are you wearing?
31:20My Delacorte ski jacket.
31:23Every Delacorte man has one.
31:25Oh, no.
31:29No, no, no.
31:31First you steal my house.
31:33Then you steal my identity.
31:35I will not let you steal my Delacorte ski jacket.
31:38This one's mine, not yours.
31:40Arr, arr, arr, arr.
31:42Do you have something on your throat?
31:44Arr, arr, arr!
31:46Dinah?
31:47Did you hear that?
31:48Oh, God.
31:50Is that the...
31:51Call of my mighty stag, brother.
31:53I must go to him.
31:54I'm duty bound.
31:55Fine.
31:56Go.
31:57I'll wait.
31:58Tis time, brother.
32:03Time for what?
32:04Tis time.
32:05I hereby challenge you to a stag duel.
32:12Right here.
32:13Right now.
32:15In the snow.
32:16Be prepared to be charged.
32:19You don't want this, man.
32:20Then run it.
32:22Then charged again.
32:23I went to war.
32:25I have my tactics.
32:27Tactics?
32:27I heard your call, brother.
32:35I heard your call, brother.
32:37I heard your call, brother.
32:38You all right there, stags?
32:53See you later.
32:57You may have won this battle.
33:04But you sure will not win the war.
33:12Don't worry about me.
33:14I'm fine.
33:18Open the door.
33:19It's me.
33:21Oh, Douglas.
33:23I can't have you storming my castle.
33:25I promised Devlin I wouldn't.
33:27Well, I think you will change your mind
33:29when you see what I am carrying.
33:31I have to prove that Norma isn't Norma.
33:35All right.
33:36Just get in here.
33:41What is it?
33:43Can we have sex now?
33:45Prove first.
33:46Okay.
33:47I have in my pocket a packet of letters
33:49that proves that not only does Agnes exist,
33:52but she is most likely a murderer.
33:56What?
34:04What?
34:05They're gone.
34:06I must have switched jackets with Robert
34:08when I was ramming him on the mountain.
34:10What?
34:11Forgive me.
34:12How long have you worked here?
34:14Oh, since the convent days,
34:17through the war times,
34:19through the neonatal times,
34:22right up to the ski chalet times.
34:25So you were here when it was a hospital.
34:30The glory days.
34:32You wouldn't have any records from those times.
34:35Birth certificates, perhaps.
34:48Excuse me.
34:54Well, how are you finding Switzerland?
34:56Well, it seems like my wife
34:58has completely abandoned me on our honeymoon,
35:01but otherwise it's going swimmingly.
35:03Look, I'm sorry I gave your letters to Evelyn.
35:08That was wrong of me.
35:10But I'd still really like to be your friend.
35:13Ditto, pal.
35:14And don't sweat it.
35:18Ooh, nice watch.
35:20Evelyn gave it to me.
35:22Did she?
35:29Right up with me.
35:30Oh, you changed for dinner.
35:34Well, in Palm Beach,
35:35we changed for breakfast, lunch,
35:36martinis, and dinner.
35:38Oh, how nice.
35:40I've been wearing the same shit for 40 years.
35:44I go slow.
35:45These aren't what they used to be.
35:48You take your time.
35:49I so appreciate your kindness.
35:51May I tell you something, as a friend?
36:03Yeah.
36:06In Palm Beach,
36:07people only give a significant other fancy jewelry
36:11when it's not a birthday or a holiday
36:13for one reason.
36:16What reason?
36:17Guilt.
36:22It's an apology.
36:25An apology for what?
36:31Well,
36:32let me put it to you this way.
36:36Perry has four.
36:43I'm sorry.
36:44I'm sorry.
36:47I hope that was the right thing to do.
36:53It was.
36:56Marriage is hard, Eddie.
36:58It's really hard.
36:59But if you love her,
37:01please give Evelyn a chance to explain.
37:03I've been her,
37:04as you know.
37:05Want to ski down with me?
37:16Trying to keep up?
37:17You whore.
37:39Cozy room you've got here.
37:42Yeah,
37:42my little bird's nest.
37:45Rollins,
37:45you said,
37:46yeah?
37:46Penelope Rollins.
37:47Her father's name was Eugene,
37:49but everyone called him Skeet.
37:51I think you love this Skeet guy.
37:53I can tell.
37:55Another life,
37:56when I was just a Rollins,
37:59not that being a Rollins was simple,
38:01but since then,
38:02I've tacked on so many names.
38:04I,
38:04I fear I'm
38:05getting further and further
38:07from myself.
38:08Live long enough
38:10as a woman
38:11and you will be
38:12many people
38:13along the way.
38:15All of them
38:15will be you.
38:16Oh,
38:17that's what I'm afraid of.
38:20Racine,
38:21Muggles,
38:23Verth,
38:24oh,
38:25look,
38:26here we are.
38:28Rollins,
38:30Penelope,
38:32Papa name Eugene,
38:35Mama Linda?
38:36Yes,
38:37Penelope's mother's name
38:39was Linda,
38:40which is why she now
38:41calls herself Linda.
38:43One life,
38:44so many names.
38:46Yes.
38:50Why don't you stay up here
38:52for a little bit?
38:53Be alone.
38:55I think you might enjoy that.
38:57I might,
38:58yes,
38:59thank you.
39:06I know you are out there,
39:19pretty thing.
39:19I know you are out there,
39:23pretty thing.
39:23you do not want to do whatever it is you are thinking of doing.
39:34Let's go get some grub,
39:41yeah?
39:45Yeah.
39:46You know,
39:46back in the convent days,
39:48we nuns used to sneak around in the back halls,
39:51so the priests wouldn't be tempted.
39:54Jerks.
39:55Yeah,
39:56jerks.
40:11Come,
40:11sit by the fire.
40:15I'll go get the kid.
40:16He's in the shower.
40:31So what's your plan?
40:33Shoot.
40:35What are you doing?
40:36What did you learn how to pick a lock?
40:43Sister Immaculata used to make me break into the priest's candy bolt in the orphanage.
40:49It's all about getting the tongue in the right place.
40:55Oh, Norma,
40:59I've become someone I don't recognize.
41:03Such is life.
41:04Tell me everything.
41:06I've misled so many people.
41:09People have been hurt.
41:11And worse.
41:13The idea of going back to Palm Beach for this big wedding of the season.
41:19For what?
41:20It's a big, disgusting show.
41:25You're going to be a mother, Mitzi.
41:28And a mother does what she must for her child.
41:32You make it sound easy.
41:34Switzerland was made for moments like this.
41:40What is this?
41:41A Catholic annulment.
41:43You'll be free of Douglas for good.
42:02There they are.
42:03What are you doing?
42:05Taking back my Delacorte ski jacket.
42:07Stop being so turlish.
42:09Just let's go.
42:10Just leave it.
42:11Come on.
42:12Here, here.
42:14I press the button for dinner.
42:15I press the button for dinner.
42:16Window.
42:17Come on.
42:18Come on.
42:22Woo!
42:23Woop!
42:24Fantastic.
42:25Woo!
42:28Woo!
42:29Fancy.
42:31What's the occasion?
42:32This is a big, big night.
42:34And what is your window doing open?
42:37You're going to catch your death.
42:42Oh, please.
42:43You're just angry because father never loved you.
42:45It's because I knew his secret.
42:48What secret?
42:50He had a second family.
43:04Oh!
43:18Oh!
43:24That's enough for me.
43:26Don't let me!
43:27Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on!
43:57Welcome to the frambless whore, Brule-Burnie!
44:27You'll get...
44:39I am fine.
44:41Posse poopers.
44:46Agnes P. Moriarty.
44:49There's Barry here.
44:53No, Norma's Barry here.
44:56It's buried here.
44:58The real Norma.
45:03Norma Bones.
45:14You said no one would find you here, Norma.
45:17Missy's my favorite, so I invited her.
45:20You're tempting fate.
45:22Oh, pish.
45:23I'll keep her secret, Robert.
45:26What are you up to?
45:36So, this is what vacation is like.
45:39I can't believe you won't tell me about the Russian mole.
45:42You need to drop it, Anne.
45:43Sorry.
45:44My restless inquiring mind is a curse.
45:49And I know you want to tell me.
45:51Aren't we there yet?
45:53As friends?
45:54As partners in this adventure?
45:56I can't tell you I lose my job.
45:59You hate your job.
46:00You're always saying how those people use you and take you for granted.
46:06They don't see you as a real person.
46:14There's a Russian mole in Palm Beach.
46:16Someone with a direct line to the Kremlin.
46:17This person is highly connected.
46:18And although their identity remains unknown, it is known they run in circles with Pinky and Raquel Kimberly Marco.
46:24However, the Marcos have gone missing ever since they got arrested by the IRS in a secret raid.
46:30How do you feel?
46:36Great.
46:37I thought I was going to go crazy.
46:39Why don't you stay locked up inside yourself?
46:41It makes anyone crazy.
46:42Like that loom, Lottie.
46:44You know why they made sexy girls go away to places like this back then, don't you?
46:48There's Anne.
46:49Anne!
46:50Virginia!
46:51Come quick.
46:52Hurry!
46:53Here, look.
46:54Look!
46:55Agnes P. Moriarty.
46:581890 to 1905.
47:01She's not alone.
47:06Who's Charlotte Moriarty?
47:081865 to...
47:10There's no death year.
47:12I mean, she's still alive.
47:14Anne, why will girls sit to this place?
47:17If they were unmarried and pregnant.
47:20Charlotte.
47:21Charlotte.
47:22That's long for Lottie.
47:25So Lottie's enormous.
47:30Mother.
47:31Vandu!
47:32Sit down, Mama.
47:34Mama?
47:35Yes.
47:36We're all family here, or we could be.
47:39You all need to eat your Alfred McGronin.
47:43It's the winter here.
47:45You're way too skinny.
47:47Mitzi.
47:48Mitzi's being a very brave girl.
47:51She's annulled her marriage to Douglas.
47:54It takes a lot of courage, Mitzi.
47:57However, there is a matter of the trust.
48:0082 million smackaroos, Wiener.
48:03All right.
48:04Yes, please.
48:06That is a lot of money just to leave sitting there.
48:10Well, I have no intention of letting it just sit.
48:13All you have to do, Mitzi, is marry a Delacorte.
48:18You happen to know one, Robert?
48:25Yeah, but I'm not a Delacorte.
48:27I adopted you.
48:28You're my son.
48:29But you are not a Delacorte.
48:31I've been a Delacorte longer than you've been alive.
48:35I say who I am, nobody else.
48:38I've earned this name, and nobody is going to take it from me or from you.
48:43Shakespeare asked, what's in a name?
48:47I think he thought a name had no inherent value or meaning.
48:52Bozo!
48:53He didn't have 82 million bucks attached to his.
48:57The name Delacorte saved my life.
49:00And now it's going to save this poor unmarried girl.
49:05That money was never Douglas's.
49:09It was never Maxine's.
49:11Hell, it was never mine.
49:13That money belongs to the child.
49:20What do you say, my boy?
49:22Do it for mother?
49:23Do it for mother?
49:40I'm getting married in the morning.
49:41Ding dong!
49:42The bells are going to chime!
49:47Shut up, mother.
49:48So this is where you've been hiding?
49:53No, not hiding.
49:56Ruminating.
49:58Anything you want to ruminate in my direction?
50:02In fact, there is.
50:08I...
50:13I...
50:14I don't think that's Douglas's baby.
50:20I don't believe it.
50:21I didn't either at first, but then I pressed Mitzi,
50:24and I'm telling you, that bean pole is up to no good.
50:26She's a clever little rat.
50:28Rat?
50:29I am working multiple lanes, baby.
50:31Meantime, Maxine has no idea, and I'm getting her to give me
50:35some of her half of the baby money to pay off the IRS.
50:38And then after Linda, yes, Linda gets here.
50:41My bet is dollars to donuts, one call to Interpol,
50:44and we get our house back.
50:49Wow.
50:50And I did it all for us.
50:51For you.
50:55Is that all?
50:56Is that all?
50:57Isn't that enough?
50:58Your wife is a genius!
51:00My wife is a snake!
51:01It's a snake!
51:09Was it Jed?
51:15That he...
51:20I love you.
51:22I love you.
51:28Happy honeymoon.
51:38Come be schnapps!
51:40Hot come be schnapps over here!
51:45Hot schnapps!
51:46Is this your fountain of youth?
51:50Perhaps.
51:52Here's mud in your eye.
51:54Here's mud in your eye.
52:00Rough night?
52:02That's an understatement.
52:04Perry!
52:06I've been looking high and low for you.
52:08I saw you being all chummy with your ex-boyfriend.
52:12Perry, you are totally out of line.
52:13Hard.
52:14Hard.
52:15Hard!
52:17Come everyone, gather around the fireplace.
52:19I have a story to tell.
52:22Everybody come, gather around the fireplace.
52:26Quiet please.
52:27Whatever you do, don't tip her off that we know what we know.
52:29We have to keep her ignorant and buttered up so she'll spill.
52:33Quiet!
52:37This is the history of Frampus, told by me, Lottie.
52:43Frampus had a different name once, but that name has been forgotten to time.
52:49What we do know is that she was a small town girl with big city dreams.
52:56She found work as a scullery maid with Mr. and Mrs. Frampus.
53:03Now, I know that your Santa Claus is just a nice fat man, but our Frampus is not quite so cuddly.
53:10He's covered in black fur.
53:13He has horns and feet like a goat.
53:17Hard to believe that a man like this has an easy time with the ladies, but...
53:22Women are easy, Lottie.
53:23Just ask this Frampus whore.
53:26Well, then I curse you, Perry.
53:28I curse you like the witch whore that I am.
53:31Hey, no more from the peanut gallery.
53:37So, time passes.
53:40Frampus falls in love.
53:43She feels bad.
53:44She cares for Mrs. Frampus, too.
53:48But her love for the horned man is fierce.
53:54It's strong.
53:56It burns like a fire inside, getting stronger and stronger day by day.
54:02She makes a mistake.
54:07As humans are wont to do.
54:10Your room service has arrived.
54:14Perfect timing.
54:16Gosh, I really want to read this first letter.
54:19We had fun today.
54:21Together.
54:23Yes.
54:29Okay.
54:30Here we go.
54:33When Mrs. Frampus finds out about their little secret,
54:40and boy is she mad.
54:43Dear Dad.
54:45I hope it's okay that I call you that.
54:48I keep writing, but you never write me back?
54:52Dear Dad.
55:02Well, these can't be from Norma.
55:03I saw you in the papers after you were shot.
55:07I never thought I'd find you.
55:15What?
55:17Well, these are all addressed to Robert.
55:18Douglas, what's wrong?
55:19Her rage is so much that it threatens to destroy her.
55:32She decided to destroy poor Frampus instead.
55:38She threw lentils in front of the fire, and then she told Frampus to run and get her broom, to clean it up, and then BAM!
55:46She shoved her into the roaring flames.
55:50But what Mrs. Frampus doesn't know is that she has infected Frampus with her rage.
55:59Douglas, what is it?
56:01The schnapps.
56:03What?
56:04Don't drink the schnapps!
56:05Douglas!
56:06Norma's mother gave me the...
56:07What?
56:08Douglas, what is it?
56:09What's wrong?
56:10Douglas, talk to me!
56:11The evil will be punished.
56:14The karma will come.
56:17Anyone who has done wrong will be struck down.
56:22And that is why I say beware the curse.
56:27No!
56:28No!
56:29Don't let me!
56:31Beware the curse of Frampus!
56:46It's Frampus!
56:57Oh, Douglas!
56:58Oh, no!
56:59Oh, no!
57:00Oh, no!
57:02Help!
57:03Douglas!
57:04Oh, sweetie!
57:05Oh, what's happening?
57:06Oh!
57:19Goodbye again, Agnes.
57:20Yes!
57:21Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
57:28Voilà , c'est comme ça, depuis 10h ce matin.
57:33Ce n'est pas libre, ce n'est pas libre.
57:36I feel the anger, it makes me feel like I'm not free, I'm not free
57:44I'm not free to listen to these airs
57:48Deh, deh, deh, deh, deh, deh, deh
57:52I've tried everything, but it's not free
57:58But it's not free, it's not free
58:03I've had a phone phone with a cafe in my arm
58:07It's not free, it's not free
58:11I'm not free to listen to these airs
58:15Deh, deh, deh, deh, deh, deh
58:17I've tried everything, but it's not free
58:21I've tried everything, but it's not free
Be the first to comment