- 12 hours ago
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00:00I
00:30Excuse me, you're telling me that the woman who loves to sing at any opportunity, who
00:55organises drag nights and finger nights and all that stuff, who loves being centre of
01:00attention. All of a sudden it's her birthday and she doesn't want no fuck. I want in the
01:05mood. What are you talking about? You're always in the mood. You are the mood. Well, it's
01:14not so jazz hands when you realise. When you realise what? My life's not exactly what I
01:22thought it'd be alright at 49 the remix. So I didn't really want a fuck. Right. Is this
01:29because you've not got a fella? No. It's not just that. I love my life, but sometimes...
01:40Bit lonely. Bob on. Right. Well, listen, I know that your life might not be where you think
01:52it should be right now, but I'll let me tell you, you are fantastic. And I'm telling you
01:58now, you've made my life a hundred times better. May I have this dance? Come on now.
02:10Heyo, never fear, your cake is here!
02:13CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:15Now, that cake looks very, very heavy. It's a very good job that you've got such lovely
02:20musseling arms. Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi.
02:22You've got lovely musseling arms, too, as well, that can have played.
02:26You and Todd have saved it, eh?
02:29Oh, yeah, that's right, yeah. Where is Todd?
02:32Oh, you know, he's a bit of a liar, the way he's gone for a lie there.
02:35What? He's out there anything to drink.
02:38Well, that's my point, exactly.
02:40What, so we just wanted to go home? Oh.
02:42Left without saying his goodbye?
02:44Oh, listen, don't worry about goodbyes. You see him all the time. Don't you worry little
02:48Ed about Todd. Oh, Sally Spectacular! Are you dancing?
02:51No!
02:52Cos I am asking.
02:54Move!
02:56Over him!
02:57Why would he cheat on you?
03:00There's no-one fitter than you, except me, and it's not me.
03:06So go on, then. Who is she? Carl's latest.
03:16It's James.
03:20James? James Bailey?
03:27I can't believe this.
03:30James! That sneaky little skank!
03:32Oh, Carl's the skank.
03:36You blew up your life for him.
03:38Oh, thanks for the reminder.
03:40What am I going to do, Tris?
03:42Well, you can stop being such a sap.
03:45And you would come to the right place for sympathy.
03:48No, I mean it, Abby.
03:50Remember who you are.
03:53No, you're right.
03:54What am I doing here?
03:55I should be chucking Carl's clothes out the window,
03:57or, I don't know, cutting up his best jacket.
04:00No, that's amateur.
04:01You're smarter than that.
04:03I'm not, though, am I?
04:04We were putting money aside for our new life in flaming Dusseldorf,
04:12and I'm putting groceries on credit cards
04:15while he's copping off with anyone he likes.
04:20Right, so he's got a nice little nest egg, has he, for Germany?
04:23A few grand.
04:24Be a shame if that went missing.
04:28What, you reckon I should rob it?
04:31Pay your debts off, buy a fabulous pair of shoes,
04:34and walk all over him, fleece him!
04:38I knew there was a reason you and me were mates.
04:41Do not shed a single tear over him again, okay?
04:44Do you hear me?
04:45Damn right.
04:47Right, I've got to go, cos, erm, I've got some stuff to do.
04:54And did you not think to ask me first?
04:58I wasn't going to see my ma out in the street, was I?
05:01She's not going to be happy until I'm in the gutter.
05:03Oh, that's not true. You two just clash.
05:05Christmas didn't do any good, either.
05:07That was all her doing.
05:09I know, but...
05:10Babe, she hates my guts.
05:12She doesn't.
05:15Eva, take this upstairs, would you?
05:17Today, if it's not too much trouble.
05:19It is, actually. You'll have to do it yourself.
05:22Carefully don't break your neck on the way up.
05:24I'm surprised that hasn't happened to you in those trashy heels.
05:27Alright, enough.
05:29This is our home.
05:31Exactly.
05:32No, I mean all of ours.
05:33So can we please just get along?
05:37She hasn't even said sorry.
05:38Well, I am sorry.
05:40I'm sorry you feel so aggrieved.
05:42Babe, that is not an apology.
05:44That's the best you're going to get.
05:46Now, can we just move forward, please?
05:48I'll do a spot of cleaning.
05:51Stay to the place.
05:52Right, seriously.
05:53Babe, babe, babe, babe.
05:55So how is university for the very, very, very mature student?
06:04Oh, well, you know me.
06:07Potential barrister.
06:09Elderly, vagrant, pub, landlady.
06:11Landlady, I treat everyone the same.
06:13It'd be an awful pity if you got barred, wouldn't it?
06:16I thought you were studying law, not medicine.
06:20If you must know, this is all about my grandson's accident.
06:24Well, his recovery from the hit and run.
06:28Mystery of the century?
06:29I'd like you to know that this is my life.
06:32It's not some cheap TV thriller.
06:34Oh, the drama of you.
06:37That.
06:39He's still alive, isn't he?
06:41And on the mend?
06:42Well, he would be.
06:43If he went to his physio, if he weren't too scared, the stubborn ox.
06:47And he doesn't listen to a word you say.
06:49Maybe it's the way you say it.
06:51Maybe he's just a stubborn ox who needs to apologise.
06:55Sometimes you have to.
06:57With family.
06:59You see, if I'd cancelled the spar, I would have lost my hefty deposit, you know.
07:09Who is this bloke, any road?
07:11Andrew Scott.
07:12Well, he's an amazing actor that me and Todd adore.
07:15But I get that you didn't want to lose your deposit, so it's fine.
07:18Can you take someone else?
07:20Well, it was kind of more for Todd than me.
07:22But, erm, yeah, I'm sure I could find someone.
07:25Hey, I've just found this in Todd's jacket.
07:28Oh, hey, hey, someone.
07:30Alert the authorities.
07:31They found my boyfriend's bone in his jacket.
07:33No, I mean, I don't need it.
07:34Won't he?
07:35I'm gonna drop it on over to me.
07:37Oh, Billy, you're sleeping off the ale.
07:38He doesn't need to be playing candid crush.
07:40What if he needs to contact us?
07:41No, he won't.
07:42Look, put it back and I'll reunite it with him when I get home.
07:45All right?
07:46All right, guys, guys, the kick is up.
07:50Help!
07:51Help!
07:52Back home!
08:01Sorry.
08:02Sorry!
08:18This hotel website's really basic. There's barely any reviews.
08:22Why are you still banging on about this?
08:24Because it doesn't add up. It's like a front or something.
08:27But when you spoke to somebody on the phone before,
08:30you spoke to an actual human and they said that Carla was staying there.
08:33Yeah, but when I try and book it, look,
08:36it doesn't let me go any further.
08:38Well, then, the website designer needs a second.
08:41Yeah, but also, when I look at maps,
08:44it's a building site.
08:47Well, yeah, but, I mean, maps, they're never, like, fully up to date, are they?
08:51I mean, it's probably just a bit behind or something.
08:54Do you remember when we went to that boutique hotel in Portugal
08:57and it was only, like, half built?
08:59Yeah, I do.
09:00She was, like, ten, so it was really exciting.
09:02I was like, if I don't laugh, I'm gonna cry.
09:04I can't imagine Carla seeing the funny side then.
09:06No.
09:07No, I think if it turns out to be a dud hotel,
09:09then she's gonna chew my ear off and complaining about it when she gets back.
09:14So you reckon I'm making something out of nothing?
09:16I'm sure she's by the pool, just topping up the tan and eyeing up the talent.
09:21Oh.
09:24Don't make a sound.
09:26Oh, I'll knock you out proper this time.
09:28Please just let me go.
09:30Oh, God, you talk like I'm some kind of monster,
09:32but I came back to give you your kidney meds and look what you did to me.
09:36Oh.
09:37You didn't have to do that.
09:39It really hurts.
09:42You got me locked up in a coffin and you're the victim.
09:45It is what it is.
09:47Like, yeah, it's not ideal, but I didn't want you to suffer,
09:50which is why I brought your meds.
09:52You can sing for these now.
09:54I know, Becky.
09:55Please, I need them.
09:56No!
09:59You know Lisa's gonna figure out who you really are.
10:06Lisa and me know each other inside out.
10:09And you can't mess with that.
10:11Even though you tried.
10:13You're so damned.
10:15I don't care what you think.
10:16Cos pretty soon you'll be out of the picture
10:18and I'll get my happy ending with my family.
10:23If you were gonna kill me, you'd have killed me by now.
10:29Look at you.
10:30You're shaking.
10:33You're not a killer.
10:35You're not good at it, ain't you?
10:37No.
10:42But I don't have to, do I?
10:46Cos without meds your body's gonna fail you pretty quickly.
10:50It's all I have to do.
10:56Put on this gag.
11:04Get up.
11:09And walk out the door.
11:10I don't want it.
11:11Well, it's this or nothing, Betsy.
11:16Right, come on. Get the plates out, will you?
11:17OK, Mrs Krabs.
11:18Excuse me.
11:19Hello.
11:20We are dishing up stir-fry again.
11:21Are you hungry?
11:22Yeah, starved babes.
11:23Where have you been all day?
11:24I, um...
11:25You make every questions on the police interrogation.
11:27Betsy, I don't.
11:28I was just concerned.
11:29You know, you...
11:30You look like deaf.
11:31You look like deaf.
11:32I don't know.
11:33I don't know.
11:34I don't know.
11:35I don't know.
11:36I don't know.
11:37I don't know.
11:38Well, it's this or nothing, Betsy.
11:39Right, come on.
11:40Get the plates out, will you?
11:41OK, Mrs Krabs.
11:42Excuse me.
11:43Hello.
11:44We are dishing up stir-fry again.
11:45Are you hungry?
11:46Yeah, starved babes.
11:47Where have you been all day?
11:48I, um...
11:49You make every questions on the police interrogation.
11:51Betsy, I don't.
11:52I was just concerned.
11:54You know, you...
11:55You look like deaf.
11:59You all right?
12:01Oh, yeah.
12:02I'm just, you know...
12:03Oh!
12:04Mum!
12:05Oh, my God!
12:06Becky!
12:07Bex!
12:08Uh, er...
12:09Betsy calling evidence now.
12:10Yeah.
12:11Um...
12:12Becky?
12:13Becky, can you hear me?
12:14Hey, you sit down.
12:15I'll get the glove.
12:16I should get attacked more often.
12:18Maybe I should invest in a little nurse's outfit, property, caring...
12:22Shh.
12:23Although I do like the sound of that.
12:24I'm just gonna go for a week.
12:26OK.
12:27Hiya.
12:28Do you have a frostbarn?
12:29Yeah, I'll just grab it.
12:31And here she's outfit.
12:34Er...
12:35It was a joke.
12:36What are you even doing here?
12:37Well, maybe I just fancied a onion barzy.
12:41So you followed us.
12:42Us?
12:43Look, I'm sorry, Will.
12:45I know you're going to be missing out on a session, but...
12:47After what happened to Daniel, I need to be with him.
12:50Are you going on that spot?
12:51I told you I wouldn't.
12:55All right?
12:56Yeah.
12:57Yeah, we're great.
12:58Er, Will's just disappointed that I've had to cancel our session tomorrow.
13:01Committed, aren't you?
13:02Completely.
13:03Yeah.
13:07Shall we go, then?
13:08Yeah.
13:09Yeah, come on, let's cadabble.
13:12Bye, Will.
13:13Bye.
13:14I'm...
13:15I'll message you about rescheduling.
13:18Ladies.
13:24Hey.
13:25Who's lazy now?
13:27Well, what do you want?
13:28A medal?
13:29Oh, come on.
13:30Don't pretend like you're not impressed.
13:32I knew you could do it, didn't I?
13:35The physio said he's never seen someone come so far in a session.
13:38Oh, you went to the physio in the end, did you?
13:41Er, yeah.
13:42Yeah, I did.
13:43Was it helpful?
13:44Right, well, you can wipe that look off your face.
13:47Pity the physio didn't teach you to respect your elders.
13:51Well, it's a pity that my elders don't respect me as well.
13:55But, but, I probably shouldn't have spoke to you the way that I did.
14:00Well, I forgive you, all right?
14:02That's settled.
14:03What's for tea?
14:04What?
14:05Hang on.
14:06Have I been played here?
14:08Possibly.
14:09I got you to your session there, didn't I?
14:12He went of his own accord.
14:13Oh, of course he did.
14:14Of course he did.
14:15Of course he did.
14:16Listen.
14:17Listen, you was right.
14:19I shall be trying harder.
14:21All right, don't ruin it for yourself.
14:25Straight into the recycling.
14:37What is it?
14:40Uh...
14:41A few friends and my mum's reached out saying how sorry they were.
14:50And I didn't know what to say.
14:53And I know that they wanted some heartfelt thing, but...
14:57You didn't know how?
14:59Does that make me a bad person?
15:03No.
15:04No, I agree if it's...
15:07It's complicated, isn't it?
15:09You deal are you deal.
15:10All the messages just made it real, you know?
15:13Like, that's it.
15:14Like, I'm never going to see her again.
15:17She's gone.
15:18It's done.
15:20She should be proud of you, you know?
15:26Yeah, right.
15:29Following your heart.
15:33Saving your pennies to start a new life with a woman you love.
15:38And a kid.
15:41And we're almost there, aren't we?
15:43Soon we'll be able to buy our tickets.
15:46And leave all our ghosts behind.
15:49Yeah.
15:51And you don't sound too keen.
15:53You've not blown all the money, have you?
15:55Of course I haven't, and...
15:57I am keen, it's just...
15:59It's been a weird day, hasn't it?
16:01Yeah, it has.
16:06It does make you think, though.
16:08About the people you love.
16:11You'd do anything for him.
16:14Would you?
16:15What?
16:18Would you do anything for me?
16:21Of course I would.
16:23Abby, I don't know what I'd do without you.
16:26And you won't have to find out?
16:29Because you'd have to try very hard to get rid of me.
16:32Well, the doctor said it was concussion.
16:42And the wound on the back of your head.
16:44That doesn't happen without you noticing, does it?
16:45What's with her tone?
16:46She's in a hospital bed.
16:47You need to know what's going on, Betsy.
16:49What's happened, Mum?
16:50I didn't want to tell you, but I was...
17:04I was attacked.
17:07Oh, my God.
17:08Curtis's lot.
17:09Why wouldn't that be the first thing out of your mouth?
17:14It won't completely freak you out.
17:16It's me thereafter.
17:17You might have told me to do one.
17:19No, of course we wouldn't.
17:20Would we?
17:21No.
17:24Never.
17:27We can't just keep ignoring this.
17:30And you're right.
17:31They've obviously been keeping tabs on you and they clearly know where to find you.
17:34Yeah.
17:35Yeah, we can't just wait around until they do her in.
17:37We need to leave, hide out, like, right now.
17:40Right, you panicking isn't helpful.
17:42Yeah, but we've already lost her once.
17:43Don't you think I know that?
17:45I don't want to lose her again, either.
17:47Yeah, then do something.
17:48Betsy is all right.
17:49I am going to be all right.
17:52Lisa, I have to go.
17:54I need to go to Spain as soon as.
18:00We should ramp up the guest deals.
18:01People buy more when they think I won't last forever.
18:04Last forever?
18:05Nothing does.
18:06Right, Yoda.
18:08Why don't we try another cocktail night?
18:10Learn from our mistakes.
18:12You mean my mistakes?
18:13I didn't, actually.
18:15This is a learning curve for all of us.
18:17Oh, indeed it is.
18:18All right, what about a luau?
18:21I could do pina coladas, Mai Tais.
18:23I could dust off my coconuts.
18:25Oh, I know.
18:27What about a Great Gatsby?
18:28Oh, I love the 1920s and I make the best flapper.
18:32Just replace the F?
18:34You what?
18:35Oh, it was right there.
18:36I couldn't resist.
18:38Come on, babe.
18:39She's joking.
18:41Of course I am.
18:42Of course I am.
18:44Friends.
18:46Yeah.
18:47Right.
18:48Can you two ladies get on?
18:50After all, we're family.
18:51Maybe I've been a bit oversensitive.
18:58But I think Ben's right.
19:01We are family.
19:03And I think if we try hard, we could be so happy here.
19:06My son is soft and forgiving.
19:09Treats that I don't possess.
19:12You aborted my grandchild.
19:15You lied to everyone.
19:17You, lady, will never be my family.
19:21Ah!
19:22What can I get you there?
19:39Todd?
19:41Todd, what have you been?
19:42What are you doing?
19:43Your hands are like ice.
19:46You're dripping wet.
19:49Yeah, I just popped out to get some chips.
19:54I want some chips.
19:57Where are they then?
19:59What?
20:00The chips.
20:01Todd, your lips are turning blue.
20:04How long have you been out here?
20:05I feel the cold, don't I?
20:08I think you all said you'd had too much to drink.
20:12I did.
20:13No, you'd had one pint at most.
20:16You weren't drunk.
20:17I was.
20:19I saw how he seemed with you when you left.
20:24I, I, erm, I'd been insensitive and, erm, he called me on it.
20:28That, that, that was all.
20:30So what, he'd, he'd lock you out the flat?
20:32No, of course not.
20:33Well, so then, can you explain to me why you're out here in the freezing cold, wet through, with no coat on, looking like you'd, one icy drink away from hypothermia.
20:42And save me the lies about the chips.
20:44All right, yeah, we did have a bit of a tiff at the party.
20:53And then I, I went for a walk just to clear my head.
20:56About what?
20:58None of your business.
21:01All right, I, I, I'll, I'll go back home and everything will be all right.
21:05I, I, it just, it gets a bit.
21:10A bit what?
21:15He has certain, expectations of a relationship, that's all.
21:22And, erm, you know, I'm like, selfish, inconsiderate.
21:29Kind.
21:30Loving, loyal.
21:32Feels lucky to have you.
21:38What is he to my flat?
21:40Take it.
21:42For next time.
21:48I've got to get back.
21:49No, Todd.
22:02That's right.
22:03No, Todd.
22:04I've got to get those, alright here.
22:08Okay.
22:10Here we go on the off.
22:12we'll go on and out and out.
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