- 10 hours ago
- #realityrealmus
#RealityRealmUS
Reality Realm US
🎞 Please subscribe to our official channel to watch the full movie for free, as soon as possible. ❤️Reality Insight Hub❤️
👉 Official Channel: />👉 THANK YOU ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Ask her a couple of questions about the release process.
00:02I'm a little bit intimidated to go talk to those guys who I haven't talked to in forever.
00:07Like, I am a grown-ass woman, but Mary, I need you to make that first call for me so he doesn't like...
00:14They get to say whether or not she was forced to stay married to Cody forever.
00:20It is kind of intimidating, and it shouldn't be that way.
00:23I am following through with my plans for apology to my ex-wives.
00:28I feel conviction in what I am doing.
00:33Well, you've done two of them. How do you foresee it going with Mary?
00:37To be honest with you, I feel like Mary probably has more, potentially more bitterness.
00:44I love you, and I do my best to listen and not judge.
00:48But what the f*** are you thinking, saying,
00:50Okay, sure, I'm gonna go meet you in Cedar City.
00:54I'm very curious to know what this is all about.
00:59If she punches me, I'll say, I deserve that.
01:03And I will persevere until she hears me.
01:07And I will see you in Cedar City.
01:20But we all can see that's all about in either a Österreich or something.
01:25I'm in Cedar City, Utah, and I'm in a strange mood today, and I'm here to, honestly, I'm
01:48here to apologize. I am sort of surprised that Mary agreed to meet with me after everything,
01:56but, you know, as long as I don't talk bad about Jen, I think I'm going to be okay. I haven't spoken
02:01with Mary except through lawyers. Mary and I weren't talking because we made an agreement
02:08when she moved. I helped her move. She was in a good place, and when we depart, it's like,
02:14we're going to be kind to each other, right? Absolutely. And the next thing I see is her
02:19friends just trashing me, and so I got right in her face on the phone, but I was like,
02:25you need to have your friends shut their mouths, and I berated her friends, and I think she took
02:33that really, really personal. Mary and I have a lot of history. There is a tendency for us to
02:46escalate a conversation to not even be able to talk in seconds. It's explosive. We never managed
02:58that in our marriage. If we want any kind of relationship at all, we're going to have to
03:04manage it now.
03:17Are you putting them in the trash bag? Mom used to always gather them in a bucket.
03:21We have buckets. And dump it.
03:23You know, we always had a garden in one form or another the whole time the kids were growing
03:28up. Look at how big the rashes are, Maddie. Look, they're gigantic.
03:31The bees are coming now. And it's much easier to garden in North Carolina than anywhere I've
03:37lived before. So I've got to go for a couple of days. I've got to go to Salt Lake. I'm going
03:43to meet with the church leadership about a spiritual divorce from your dad.
03:47A release? Yeah. Yeah.
03:52I have approached the church leadership and asked for a release, given my justification,
03:57given my reasons. And then I need to go meet with them. And then I think it's kind of just
04:01a decision process after that.
04:05My initial reaction is, what the f***? Why?
04:09I don't want her to go back to it. I think plural marriage in general is pretty toxic.
04:18Look, I'm not part of the faith anymore, but Maddie, it was what I honoured as a marriage covenant.
04:23It was a marriage to me, as binding as a legal marriage. So I just want to have all ties broken.
04:31Just, so.
04:34What if they tell you no?
04:35Where do you stand if they tell you no?
04:39I will feel like I've done everything I needed to do, and I'll hold myself good.
04:44Divorced?
04:45If they say no, and I mean, I have to admit, it is a possibility, but I don't think so. But if they do,
04:51I don't think God intends for me to stay connected to this person who doesn't want to be married to
04:56me and has moved on with his life, and the same with me. Like, why would that need to be honoured?
05:01But, of course, that would be a little bit more of a crisis of faith, so I'd have to figure it out
05:05when I get there.
05:07Does Cody know you're going to ask for one?
05:09Yeah, I told him.
05:10You told him?
05:11Mm-hmm.
05:11He didn't really care. He was like, well, they're going to tell you you can't marry outside of the
05:16faith or whatever. I'm like, that's fine.
05:17I don't know what that means, and I don't really care. I'm going to marry who I want if I ever get
05:21married again. But, you know, it's okay. I can do what to, I can follow my conscience on how this is
05:27supposed to play out. Um, Janelle may have told me that she was going to ask for a release. I don't
05:34remember. It's just not something I'm tracking. One thing that is an issue that I know is that I'm
05:40not allowed to ask for one. So if an ex-wife calls me a coward for not going to the leaders and asking
05:46for a release, it's because I did. And they said, no, you can't ask for one. You know? It's like,
05:53it could be a dogma of the religion. I have no idea. I am a little nervous to go talk to the
06:01church leadership. I don't know what I'm going to get. I don't know what I'm going to be,
06:05what I have to expect. So it's always a little bit of that unknown that gives you some butterflies.
06:10If they say no, it's going to be a huge struggle for me to reconcile
06:14what I know is right compared to what they say. And that will be, that will be hard.
06:23You know, the whole situation with the property and the lawyers just made things, you know,
06:46pretty awkward. And so I'm like, how are we supposed to go into this conversation
06:51with the last time having no conversation? So I just don't know what to expect.
07:00Hey, Mary. How are you? I'm thriving.
07:05Thriving. Good. How are you?
07:07Hey, listen, nothing but goodwill here. Do you want a hug or you want to shake?
07:11I don't know, Cody. The last time I saw you, you completely ignored me. So I don't know.
07:21I'm sorry, Mary. I felt like you didn't even make eye contact.
07:26I only tried to make eye contact.
07:28Really? Okay.
07:29Well, then we'll start from that bad place and move up.
07:34Okay.
07:35What do you think?
07:36Okay.
07:37Tell me about thriving.
07:39No, life is good. I'm just doing all good things.
07:45Good.
07:46Life is good. How about you?
07:48Details? What are your good things?
07:49You know what? I appreciate that you are curious.
07:58I'm friendly.
07:59But we're not in, we haven't had that kind of relationship to tell you all my, all my deep dark secrets. You know what I mean?
08:07Oh, I'm not asking for those.
08:09I know.
08:11I'm just, I'm.
08:12This is more about friendly.
08:18And I appreciate that.
08:19I don't expect you to be my friend.
08:21Well, we've, I've tried. And I've wanted that. We, we said that we were going to do that.
08:27Yeah, I agreed to that. And I did that.
08:30And then that, I did not feel that you did that.
08:32Well, I don't want to argue.
08:34Okay.
08:34I'm here for a whole different reason.
08:36Okay.
08:40Cody didn't talk a lot about his relationships to me.
08:44That was a private thing. Like his relationship with each wife was private, but it's not that way anymore.
08:54I didn't feel like I needed to be there because I know Cody will talk to me about it.
08:57Mine and Mary's history is its own minefield.
09:08One misstep can be like a landmine going off.
09:12That's the reason I want to apologize as I helped her create this world that is so toxic.
09:18Well, I still got the vibe that you're very sore.
09:28I'm very guarded because I don't know what this is all about or why.
09:37And our last couple of interactions haven't been great.
09:41No, they've been through lawyers.
09:45So, but you've got all of your share of Coyote Pass.
09:54Okay.
09:55You should be very happy.
09:57I kept my promise, but I don't want to go for water into the bridge.
10:10I just want to start or however you see it, just end.
10:16I apologize, Mary.
10:21Apologize for everything that has happened.
10:23And I basically want you to be able to have a very happy and wonderful life.
10:34I do have a very happy and wonderful life.
10:39I'm glad you do.
10:41That's good.
10:43That's a good thing.
10:45And that makes me feel...
10:49You don't need to feel anything about it.
10:53If you do, that's great.
10:55But I don't need you to feel anything about any way that my life is going.
11:02Okay.
11:07I want you more than anything to just be able to move on.
11:10I do.
11:11I am.
11:11I have.
11:13The way your friends talk about me, that doesn't seem like it.
11:16But I wanted you to be able to do that.
11:18You can stop right there.
11:19Listen, this isn't a time for us to fight.
11:25Well, then don't bring up my friends and what they say.
11:28Because guess what?
11:29I'm going to tell you this, Cody.
11:33No, I'm going to tell you this.
11:34Because it'll just ruin...
11:35No.
11:35I'm just here to apologize, Mary.
11:37Not to argue with you.
11:38No, I'm going to tell you this, Cody.
11:38I'm going to tell you.
11:40You're not going to shut me down anymore.
11:41My first mistake was ever saying that she did anything wrong.
11:49I don't need to win an argument, and I don't need validation here.
11:53And yet, I'm triggering.
11:54And I'm like, oh, dude, just stay on point.
11:58Just apologize again.
11:59You know, it's hard to hate a person who said, I'm sorry, a hundred times.
12:07At this point in the conversation, I thought, if this is how this is going to be, I'm not
12:14going to continue engaging in this.
12:16If it gets any more than this, I'm out.
12:19I'm going to walk away.
12:20You're in the basement, and you could hear everything upstairs.
12:32Yeah, Mary was upstairs, and I could hear everything.
12:38Apology is so needed here.
12:41Because this is still so toxic.
12:44Do you apologize that you are toxic to me?
12:50I need to figure out what we've already spent with what's left in the budget, so we can
13:06figure all of this out.
13:07Because we've got a budget for it, but I'm going to be honest, I don't think I deducted
13:11the entire room.
13:12So we have a full basement in our house.
13:16None of the walls are finished.
13:18It's just one big, huge area.
13:19There's, like, plumbing for a bathroom, and we have plans for our basement.
13:24So a bedroom here, because I think having a room done here would be great.
13:28We're going to have a bathroom, full bathroom.
13:31Yeah, full bathroom.
13:31A bedroom for the kids, or whoever gets to come over.
13:36For guests.
13:36Now I have to be more creative.
13:37For guests.
13:38I can do it.
13:38Or for one of our moms.
13:41I don't know.
13:41I don't know what's going to happen.
13:43And then this can be at, like, its own apartment.
13:46I have to tell you, this was the craziest thing I was thinking about the other day.
13:49I used to be a basement wife.
13:53In polygamy, there is a term, basement wife.
13:57I'm having, like, anxiety about it.
14:00It's almost like...
14:01That sounds kind of cool.
14:03A basement wife, and I have an upstairs wife, and then main upstairs.
14:06No, no, no.
14:06What did you just say?
14:08How many wives are you having?
14:09I have a basement wife.
14:11I don't like this conversation.
14:12Basement wife in polygamy is, you know, in houses, there's often a basement, and a wife
14:18sometimes has to live in the basement.
14:20But the mentality behind it is that you really are below another wife.
14:24When we moved into the Lehigh house, it was just my intention to be a team player.
14:28Like, there were three sections.
14:29There were three wives at the time.
14:31And, you know, Janelle had more kids, and there was only two bedrooms upstairs, maybe three
14:35bedrooms upstairs where Mary was.
14:37So it just worked to have me have that.
14:39It just worked.
14:40I was one.
14:41The last time we lived in Lehigh.
14:43And I really honestly felt like it.
14:45Did you do rock, paper, scissors to figure out who's going to be in the basement?
14:48No, true story, I volunteered.
14:50Wow.
14:51I know, I was so self-deprecating.
14:53You're in the basement, and you could hear everything upstairs.
14:56Yeah, Mary was upstairs.
14:56And Mary and Cody, they fought all the time.
14:58I'm just going to tell you that straight up.
14:59There are things you hear that you don't really want to hear.
15:03And I could hear everything.
15:08It's like I always knew where Mary was walking in the house.
15:10I knew what bedroom she was in, anything like that, just because it was super thin.
15:13The ceiling was super thin.
15:14So all the extra noises and things like that, yeah, I heard those too.
15:18There is this idea of a basement wife in a plural family, and it's really sad.
15:28It's unfortunate that it's a thing, but it kind of is a thing.
15:32I think in plural marriage, I think everybody takes a turn maybe being the basement wife.
15:36I don't know.
15:37Like, I was the basement wife plenty in the early years, you know.
15:41It was never, ever, ever condoned by our church for there ever to be hierarchy.
15:48So if it was happening, it was because people weren't being cool.
15:51You're not going to shut me down anymore.
16:06The cruel irony in Mary saying, I'm not going to let you shut me down anymore is the weirdest
16:15thing, because all three, two exes and Robin, don't believe Mary has ever been silenced, ever.
16:27This is something Cody's done the whole time I've known him, is just try to talk over me
16:33or try to stop me from saying something.
16:35I'm not going to let him do it anymore.
16:38I'm going to finish what I'm saying.
16:39And what I'm saying is, when I'm not treated well, the people closest to me will defend me.
16:46And that's what my friends do.
16:48Okay.
16:52So.
16:52I apologize for my feelings towards your friends.
16:59You don't have to apologize for that, Cody.
17:01You get, here's the thing, you get to have your feelings.
17:06You don't get to tell me them, though.
17:09No, I want to, no, it's not about my feelings.
17:11It's about, it's about an apology, because, listen, apology is so needed here, because
17:24this is still so toxic, and I apologize for that.
17:30Do you apologize that you are toxic to me?
17:35Or are you just being general?
17:36I apologize that I am toxic to you, Mary, or was toxic to you.
17:47I mean, what do you want me to apologize for?
17:50I don't want you, I didn't know what this was about.
17:52I don't, but I don't feel like you need to apologize for-
17:56You're nothing but goodwill.
17:57Okay, it's, I'm not getting that vibe.
18:01I'm not quite sure what I'm getting, and I'm very guarded by it, and I don't, I don't-
18:06Nothing, nothing but goodwill.
18:07I'm trying to understand if there's anything genuine here.
18:09Mary, I apologize.
18:11I am sorry.
18:13Okay?
18:14Nothing but goodwill.
18:16Okay?
18:18I want to let that, all that furniture float down the river.
18:23Dude, I didn't even bring this furniture with me.
18:27I'm trying to be funny.
18:32Metaphorically, I get what you're saying, though.
18:34I'm hella hilarious, and that's something you just don't get about me, so whatever.
18:40It's unfortunate.
18:44I'm sorry that I don't find you hilarious.
18:46I apologize for that.
18:47You don't need to apologize for not finding me funny.
18:50Yeah.
18:51The people who find me funny and are in my world and want to be in my world are there, and
18:54they get it.
18:56Hmm.
18:57Cody, I said from the very beginning, sorry, from the beginning of the end-
19:07I know you did, Mary.
19:09That I wanted to be kind.
19:11Yeah.
19:13Yes.
19:14And I feel like I've done a really good job of that.
19:17I feel like-
19:18I'm glad you do, and I apologize that I didn't seem to do it fine.
19:22Okay, you've got to stop with the apologize word.
19:25The more you use it, the more it feels insincere.
19:28It triggers you?
19:29No, it doesn't trigger me.
19:30It just- it just validates that it doesn't feel like this is a sincere conversation.
19:38This is a terrible start, and I have to surrender to this.
19:42I cannot react to anything here.
19:44I have to ignore every trigger that I have struggled with for years.
19:51I have- you know, somewhere along the line here, we've got to turn over a new leaf.
20:00I'm still trying to figure out how genuine it is.
20:05I'm not convinced yet, but I'm open to seeing how it goes.
20:10I'm not trying to make us back together in any way, Mary.
20:14Oh, hell.
20:14But it was-
20:15That's never going to happen.
20:16No, no, I-
20:16We're never, ever, ever getting back together.
20:18I-
20:30This might be the one shot I get, and it's like, and I- I made a wrong step right off the bat.
20:42And it's- it's almost like, okay, apologize.
20:46It's like, if she complains about anything I have done, if I didn't do it, I'm going to apologize.
20:52I apologize mostly that I said I didn't love you.
21:08I just think that was wrong of me to say that.
21:12I won't apologize for how toxic I was during our breakup.
21:15I apologize that I wasn't there for you when we were in Las Vegas.
21:23I apologize that your dark time I wasn't there.
21:28The dark time was because you weren't there.
21:32I apologize for that.
21:34I want to give him the space to do what he intended to do.
21:45I'm still trying to figure out how genuine it is.
21:49I'm not convinced yet, but I'm open to seeing how it goes.
21:54I just, um, it was such a crazy- I- I know- I'm not trying to make us back together in any way, Mary.
22:05Oh, hell.
22:06But it is-
22:06That's never going to happen.
22:07No, no, I-
22:08We are never, ever, ever getting back together.
22:10I- I'm not- I'm not saying that.
22:13I- I don't-
22:14I don't know why you said that.
22:16I don't want my nostalgia to be mistaken.
22:20Oh, it's not.
22:21Okay, thank you.
22:21It's not.
22:22He- he just wants to make it clear, and I'm like, oh, it's clear.
22:28Oh, it's clear.
22:29It's clear on my part.
22:30I don't know how you feel.
22:32Like, are you trying to talk yourself into the fact that you still don't want me?
22:35Because I- I'm sorry.
22:37I don't.
22:39But I can tell you this.
22:41We will never, ever get back together.
22:44I'm so moved on.
22:46I'm so moved on.
22:48Your use of the word apologize
22:50feels very extreme and very forced to me.
22:55So I don't- I don't- I can't- I can't tell, like, there's parts of this conversation, Cody, that I-
23:03I'm actually very uncomfortable, Mary.
23:05I triggered the minute we got together.
23:07I apologize for that.
23:08Oh, my God.
23:09Okay.
23:10Okay.
23:11Why?
23:11Because I walked into your space?
23:14Cody, I'm not a bad person.
23:15I will stand my boundaries, though.
23:17And I think that's very uncomfortable for you.
23:20Uh, no.
23:21I- this is an apology.
23:23It is nothing but goodwill.
23:25Is it?
23:26Nothing.
23:26Nothing.
23:26Nothing but goodwill.
23:29Cody, I would love to have a conversation instead of just sit here and listen to you apologize.
23:33You and I can't talk because we will trigger each other, no matter what.
23:39So I don't get to say anything or ask questions or-
23:42You can't feel- yes, please feel free.
23:46But you just said I can't.
23:48Well, I mean, like, listen, I'm not here to argue about something.
23:53I don't want to go picking the luggage out of the river.
23:56It's down the river, all of this, our whole experience is.
23:59Okay.
24:00All right.
24:00I'll be fair, if there's something you want to discuss for the sake of closure?
24:06I don't need closure.
24:09Okay.
24:09I- I think- I think I have just-
24:13I- no, I'm- I'm- I don't need any closure.
24:18Okay.
24:18Closure's done.
24:21Okay.
24:21The more this conversation goes on, and the fact that he's saying, no, we can't have a
24:27conversation, it's- it's for him.
24:31It's for sure.
24:32Just all about him.
24:33Which is fine.
24:34If he needs this, he can have it.
24:36There's a point in my life where I had an attitude about a wife who'd threatened to leave.
24:46I- and I thought, well, I'm just going to buy her that house down the street, let her live
24:52in it for free, pay the child support, and be as generous as I can to her so that I can have access
25:00to my children.
25:04That's what you always said you were going to do.
25:08Always had that.
25:09And I'm ashamed that through the divorce processes and stuff like that, I- I forgot who I was.
25:18But my intentions had gotten really out of line with my soul.
25:27You know, before Robin even came in the family, um, he used to always say that.
25:35And so, over the past few years, when I haven't seen him behave in the way that he always said
25:47he was going to behave, it's been very disappointing.
25:57Mary was the legal wife, and so she'd have more opportunities to do things with Cody.
26:02So I felt like she was probably more important than that than I was.
26:04But I don't think that was on her.
26:06I really honestly don't.
26:07I would say it's more of the man's fault, because it shouldn't be one above the other
26:13wife.
26:14The last thing that I ever wanted was one wife being in charge of another wife.
26:19When you set out for a plural family, what you hope is that everybody is equal and all the
26:33wives have equal say.
26:35There are some families where it does not work out that way.
26:40Some families, there's one wife that's more important than all of the other wives.
26:43In our family, there were times where I felt like Mary was more in charge.
26:46Whose fault is that?
26:47All of our faults.
26:48I would say it's more of the man's fault, because if one wife says, hey, I'm the first
26:55and therefore I'm this way, he should focus on making it more equal to what goes on.
27:01It shouldn't be one above the other wife.
27:03As soon as I married Cody, he was like, there's a lot of things that Mary does that I really,
27:09really like.
27:10And I mean, if you want me to like them, then maybe you should do them like she does them
27:15kind of thing.
27:16He liked the way that she cleaned and cooked and dressed and all of these things.
27:21And Mary was the legal wife, and so she'd have more opportunities to do things with Cody
27:24because she was the legal wife.
27:26So I felt like she was probably more important than I was.
27:29But I don't think that was on her.
27:30I really honestly don't.
27:32And I think that Cody wasn't even meaning it, to be completely honest.
27:36I don't think he was trying to.
27:37But I do think that it just happened.
27:41In our early years, before Robin came in the family, it definitely felt like that Cody would
27:47rotate his attention or affection between me and Janelle and Christine.
27:53Like, and I knew, like, it was very obvious that, like, he was definitely rotating.
28:01It wasn't, it wasn't like there was one person who was his favorite for the whole time until
28:07Robin came in the family, right?
28:08It was like he rotated.
28:10He took turns.
28:11Even in the culture, the first wife gets a huge, massive wedding.
28:15The next ones are small.
28:17The next one.
28:18Yeah, we've been to a wedding there, and it's like going to a funeral.
28:21Yes.
28:21It is so weird.
28:22Plural weddings are, like, way too weird.
28:26I knew growing up that I would have to marry a convert because I was literally related to
28:30everybody in the church.
28:32I did marry a convert, but I was still related to him, too.
28:36What?
28:36Yeah, I'm related to Cody.
28:37That's not cool.
28:40Third cousins once removed is fully legal.
28:43Fully.
28:43Polygamy is not legal.
28:44But I'm third cousins once removed from Cody.
28:48Wow.
28:49Wow.
28:50I know.
28:50There was always this joke about they were cousins, but they are so distantly related.
28:54It's ridiculous.
28:55I think in the polygamous families, this kind of stuff happens all the time.
28:58It wasn't the kind of relationship where, like, you saw each other at a family reunion.
29:01Like, it was a very distant relationship, but they would always joke about being cousins.
29:06It just is a small community.
29:10Being a second wife, third wife, or fourth wife, you're never, ever going to be equal to
29:14that first wife.
29:16But I'm not going to say all ones.
29:19It depends on what group it is, because down in Mexico, I've been to ones that haven't been
29:25that way.
29:25There are some families that work just fine.
29:28And even if a wife has a basement, she's not a basement wife.
29:33I want to make it clear that I never was trying to promote a pecking order.
29:37The last thing that I ever wanted in my life was one wife being in charge of another wife.
29:45No way, man.
29:47The problem was, was when I had everybody in the same home, they started to develop a pecking
29:52order.
29:53And I'm like, this is bull.
29:55I'm going to work.
29:56You guys work it out.
29:58I'm going to go make sure the mortgage is paid while you guys scrap it out here.
30:01Or go to church so you learn to be charitable.
30:07I like it.
30:08Thanks, baby.
30:08I like all of your ideas.
30:10I'm excited.
30:10And you're no longer a basement wife.
30:12Oh, thank God.
30:13I am not like how this felt.
30:19Yeah, it's, it's, uh, there's some things I don't want to relive, you know?
30:24Might be one of them.
30:25Guess what, baby?
30:26What?
30:26I'm a home housewife now.
30:28Ooh.
30:29And you're my home man, baby.
30:31My home man?
30:33Sweet.
30:33Cody, I recognize, I recognize more in you than you think that I recognize.
30:49And I know you think I'm a bitch, and I know you think all my friends are bitches, and, uh,
30:53you can keep thinking that if you want.
30:55That, that doesn't matter.
30:56I, listen.
30:56No, it matters to me.
30:58I mean, it doesn't matter.
30:59What I, what I, what you think of me and my friends doesn't matter.
31:01But my point is, Mary, my opinion of your friends, and my opinion of you, is none of
31:10your business.
31:11And I'm not saying that to be rude.
31:14I'm saying that because it matters that you do not care.
31:19I don't care.
31:21And that's good.
31:23Mary, you and I will tit for tat the rest of our lives if we just don't let it go.
31:31I, I don't want to let it go.
31:33I, I don't want to just...
31:34I, I've let it go.
31:36You just need to stop doing it.
31:38Just be the person, Cody, that you say that you are, that you want to be, and don't do
31:44that.
31:45It's not cool.
31:46Okay.
31:47Okay?
31:48If it is not my business, don't say it out loud for me to hear it.
31:51Okay?
31:52Okay.
31:53I have plenty of thoughts about you.
31:56I have plenty of opinions.
31:58I have plenty of conversations in my head about the way things have gone down.
32:02I don't want to argue with you.
32:03I'm not arguing.
32:04I'm just, you, I sat there...
32:05But everything you say, when you're not apologizing, when I'm apologizing, you don't
32:10have an argument.
32:12But now you're arguing.
32:14I'm not arguing.
32:16Okay.
32:17I'm wanting to say something and you shut me down.
32:19I just...
32:20This is how it's been our whole lives.
32:21I don't want to pull that luggage back out of the river.
32:23Okay, you can keep talking about the luggage.
32:25That's just fine.
32:26It's just, all that stuff is in the past.
32:27Okay, but you got to say some stuff.
32:30I apologized is what I did, Mary.
32:33Your apology is welcome if you want to give one.
32:37But I'm apologizing...
32:38No, I'm just asking you, Cody, to keep your opinions about me and my friends to yourself
32:45If it's not my business, please keep it to yourself.
32:47Okay?
32:48Please ask your friends to keep their opinions of me to themselves because they don't know
32:54me.
32:56They were around for many years and you know that.
33:00Not with me.
33:02Just with you.
33:04Nope, not just with me.
33:07I failed here.
33:10Because I was not sticking to my guns of just being in a benevolent state.
33:15But I'm trying to run from the argument and yet I'm still stopping to gear up for the next blow.
33:24I'm...
33:27It feels like an impossible task.
33:29I am here today to get the release from Cody.
33:40I haven't been really affiliated with that church for 15 years.
33:44Kind of nerve-wracking to go in there, but here we go.
33:48I am here today because I'm going to go in and meet with our church leadership to get the
34:03release from Cody.
34:05I just don't know.
34:07I just don't know what to expect going in.
34:09I haven't been really affiliated with that church for 15 years.
34:13Yeah, I don't know.
34:14It's kind of nerve-wracking to go in there, but here we go.
34:19For us, it really is just going before the leadership of the church and making kind of your request.
34:25I'm just going to explain that he and I don't live together anymore.
34:28And he's definitely said he wants to live with Robin.
34:31That he's totally in love with her or whatever.
34:34And he's estranged from my children, and so I feel like it's okay for me to be released.
34:40That's what I'm saying.
34:41Mary's situation was different than mine because Cody and Mary had not lived together for a very long time.
34:48Years.
34:52For me, there isn't really anything like that.
34:55Cody and I's relationship was really functioning until the last three or four years.
35:00Yeah, I just hope that's enough.
35:02I hope that's enough.
35:03We have a history, Cody.
35:18I mean, you pissed the hell out of me more ways than we can even talk about.
35:25Yeah.
35:26And I know it goes both ways.
35:31But I also know that we're never going to see eye to eye on things because even though we were in the same space on our experiences,
35:41our experiences are so vastly different.
35:46Do I wish that I had never married you?
35:48Do I wish that we had never lived plural marriage?
35:51Do I wish that we had never moved out of any of our moves?
35:56Right?
35:57No, I can't.
35:58I can't.
35:59And I won't.
36:00And I don't wish that because all those moments made me who I am.
36:02High five.
36:03Right there.
36:04And gave me the family that I have.
36:05Right there.
36:06Which I still consider family.
36:07Right there.
36:08Okay?
36:09But my point is I hope you don't, I hope you're at a place now that you can say that you don't regret it.
36:18Absolutely.
36:19Because you have so many kids, Cody.
36:24And I don't want...
36:25Let's not talk about the kids.
36:28That's verboten.
36:29That's what?
36:30Verboten.
36:31I don't know what these big words that you're using.
36:34Verboten.
36:35It means it's not allowed because it's a whole stream of bull and I don't want to talk about it.
36:40I'm working out my relationship with my children.
36:43Okay.
36:44I understand that everybody changes.
36:50There's no way I could ever expect me to be the same person I was 30 years ago.
36:56Or him to be the same person he was 30 years ago.
36:59But I would expect him to get better and be better.
37:04And I have not seen him be better in some of these ways that he's been handling the divorces.
37:13The property.
37:15His relationship with his children.
37:18I have not seen improvement there.
37:22And that makes me sad.
37:25It makes me really sad.
37:29This...
37:31I want you to feel like this is about you, but it's really about me and God.
37:36I can tell it's about you.
37:37No, it's about me and God.
37:39Oh, well, okay.
37:40Him too.
37:41That's great.
37:42I can tell.
37:43I mean, almighty requires.
37:45I don't need it to be about me.
37:51Thank you for an absolutely fascinating and wonderful life experience that we shared.
37:59It was.
38:00It was.
38:01It was very fascinating.
38:02And there was definitely wonderful moments.
38:04Okay.
38:05I had this realization a while ago that I was trying so hard to understand him.
38:10And I finally came to this realization of, I don't have to.
38:14And I'm glad that I don't understand it.
38:15I'm happy that I understand me and what I'm doing in my life.
38:19And that's all that matters.
38:20I have to run the restroom really bad.
38:21So...
38:22Okay.
38:23Well, you better run off.
38:24I'm going to say goodbye.
38:25All right.
38:26Well, thank you.
38:27I appreciate it.
38:28Most people.
38:29I mean, most.
38:30Divorce and move on.
38:31And I finally came to this realization of, I don't have to.
38:33And I'm glad that I don't understand it.
38:34I'm happy that I understand me and what I'm doing in my life.
38:38And that's all that matters.
38:39I have to run the restroom really bad.
38:40So...
38:41Okay.
38:42Well, you better run off.
38:43I'm going to say goodbye.
38:44All right.
38:45Well, thank you.
38:46Appreciate it.
38:47I appreciate it.
38:48Most people.
38:49I mean, most.
38:51Divorce and move on.
38:54I don't know what kind of relationship I have with my ex-wives.
38:59I've gone through three divorces while being married to one woman who was there standing to support me.
39:05And there's one woman in my life.
39:08And these three are ex-wives.
39:11At best, to only be friends.
39:14Thanks for meeting me.
39:16Now we can have a hug.
39:17You sure?
39:18Yes.
39:19Thank you, Mary.
39:20Thank you for the grace and the kind understanding.
39:25Well, thank you for the chat and the apologies.
39:30I appreciate it.
39:31You're welcome.
39:32I'm actually going to run.
39:33Because now that I stood up, I have to.
39:35I hope it doesn't leak.
39:37I'm not that old.
39:39I beg to differ.
39:41I know your birthday.
39:46Well, from now on, from here out, like I hope the swords are down.
39:51If we can move forward in the future, just making sure that we are very kind, we might be able to remain in good places with each other.
40:03I'm not sure at this point, you know, what this all means.
40:09There's been a lot throughout this whole divorce process, throughout the property process, things that I've discovered since then.
40:18But it doesn't affect me.
40:21I'm not listening to what he says and his opinions and his apologies and his thoughts and letting it affect me.
40:32I don't do that anymore.
40:41Next time on Sister Wives.
40:43I haven't been very fair with you.
40:46Taking accountability for his part gave him some peace.
40:51I love the family that we have and I would do it all again.
40:56I don't regret anything in the last 30 years.
40:59Are you dating?
41:00I've dated.
41:02Dated around, you know.
41:06Ron and I definitely have a connection.
41:09This is beautiful.
41:11There's a reason why we're in each other's lives.
41:15What that reason is, you know, remains to be seen.
41:18I've always wanted to do this.
41:19This is going to be fun.
41:20Woo!
Be the first to comment