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00:00My husband tried to join me in our lifeboat two men grabbed him
00:16Officers were there with guns
00:20He offered no resistance
00:23And backed off back onto the ship
00:27Began yelling and crying
00:30As they wanted to join him on the sinking ship
00:33Action!
00:55He told me that apparently we'd struck something
00:57I didn't become alarmed
01:08There was no danger
01:10They said
01:11I told her to come at once, we were sinking
01:18You can imagine the chaos and the fear and the terror of finding water in your cabin and you're in the bowels of the ship
01:29It makes me panic just thinking about it
01:31The story of the Titanic is the human condition spread out, pinned on a board for us to examine
01:40Then came the terrible cry
01:42Women and children, women and children
01:45Audrey
01:46Two men lifted me up and put me in a boat
01:49Move it! Move it!
01:50It's these small decisions, these little butterfly effect moments that change the outcome
01:55It really was every man for himself
02:10My heart stood still
02:13My heart stood still
02:23Hurry up!
02:26Pull!
02:28If we're gonna die
02:30The best to die gripping something
02:32It's a split second decision
02:33It's a split second decision
02:37What would you do?
02:38What would I do?
02:46It was a terrible son
02:48Men
02:49Swimming
02:50I'd been brought up to believe in a hell
03:03After death
03:11For now I think I went through a hell that night
03:20you're here
03:24To be soreness
03:26Guys
03:28To be soreness
03:30You're gonna die
03:32Just to be soreness
03:34Your own body
03:36The Joker
03:38The Joker
03:40The Joker
03:42Is the Joker
03:44The Joker
03:46The Joker
03:47I was working in the engineering.
04:11We got the order, all hands on deck, put your life preservers on.
04:17The deck was full of male third-class passengers.
04:22The last boat was getting lowered.
04:26About this time, I met all the engineers as they came trooping up from below.
04:33Up to that time, they had loyally stuck to their guns.
04:37When the crew come up on deck, these guys who've worked so heroically to try to keep Titanic afloat,
04:51they expect that there will be a place for them in the lifeboats.
04:55And, of course, that is not the case.
05:00British Hierarchical Society is always there to shaft the underdog.
05:06Those people who had risked their lives were not going to get any help at all.
05:13It was a bleak and hopeless spectacle that met their eyes.
05:18Empty falls hanging from every david head.
05:23Not a hope for any of them.
05:24Titanic has enough people on board that we're really seeing the whole range of reactions to facing death.
05:41From resignation to fight and flight to acting out of love and empathy to help other people.
05:49And at this point, some people choose to do things that may look quite strange.
05:53One fellow said, go to the first cabin bar room.
05:59There was a steward filling up tumblers on a tray.
06:04He said, go on lads, drink up.
06:08She's going down.
06:14Some people prefer to stay in their cabin and let the waters rise up.
06:18Others go to the bar and just start drinking the place dry.
06:21Everyone has to choose to die in their own way, whatever that is.
06:26I was for going down into one of the first-class cabins, but if how Matty wouldn't let me...
06:34Matty said to me,
06:36we'll have to jump for it.
06:46It makes me panic just thinking about it because I can imagine the chaos and the fear.
06:51It's not fair, you know, when passengers embarked on this ship, they were told it was unsinkable.
07:01They probably didn't pay much mind to how many lifeboats there were, but now that it's of the most crucial importance to them, they see that they've been failed.
07:08Captain Smith and Thomas Andrews, the ship's designer, must have been in hell. This was their unsinkable ship.
07:23Thomas Andrews was trying to do something because he is the architect of this disaster.
07:32Andrews was seen throwing steamer chairs into the water with the idea of actually helping those who got into the sea to have something to support them.
07:43It's very difficult to know what the captain's final moments were.
07:52During the Falklands War, I was a captain of a ship that was bombed, which I had to abandon.
07:57And so I know the pressures he was under, and I personally think that he probably stayed on the bridge and waited to meet his fate.
08:06But I think he would have been feeling to himself that he had failed in this last great appointment of his.
08:16There's something of the stiff upper lip happening here, but inside there must be inner turmoil.
08:22Because survival instinct is really powerful, and the captain is probably suppressing it as much as he can.
08:29The social codes of conduct fighting against that very ancient part of the brain, the primitive part that just drives us forward biologically.
08:39People just have that, the will to survive.
08:43The adrenaline system is working overtime. They've almost got nothing to lose.
08:49I wanted to jump out and try to catch one of the empty lifeboat falls.
08:53Jack Thayer has been on a dream holiday in Europe with his parents.
09:02They've got separated in the crowds, and now that dream has become a nightmare.
09:07I couldn't just jump.
09:09We might hit wreckage or a steamer chair and be knocked unconscious.
09:14Milton dissuaded me.
09:15Milton Long, 29-year-old American law clerk, and Jack had struck up a conversation many hours earlier in the dining saloon.
09:25And now they find themselves facing this life-or-death moment together.
09:30So many thoughts passed through my mind.
09:34I thought of all the good times I'd had.
09:36Of all the future pleasures I'd never enjoy.
09:46My father.
09:49My mother.
09:52I was watching myself as though from some far-off place.
09:59Sincerely pitied myself.
10:00Sincerely pitied myself.
10:17Back in the wireless room, Jack Phillips has stuck to his post right to the end.
10:23Even when Captain Smith has said it's every man for himself,
10:25because he believes he's doing something useful.
10:28He's spent the last few hours trying to communicate with other wireless operators,
10:33oblivious to everything going on around him.
10:37And his junior, Harold Bride, is deeply loyal to and respectful of Jack Phillips.
10:44The sea has almost reached the wireless room,
10:48and they have just minutes before it's filled with freezing water.
10:51I was back in my room getting Phillips' money for him.
10:55And as I looked out the door,
10:58I saw a stoker or somebody from below decks
11:02slipping the life belt off his back.
11:05You know, I remembered in a flash the way Phillips had clung on,
11:09how I'd had to fix that life belt in place because he was too busy to do it.
11:14I felt a passion not to let that man die a decent sailor's death.
11:17A decent sailor's death.
11:26I did my duty.
11:34I hope I finished him, I don't know.
11:35We left him on the floor of the wireless cabin.
11:40He wasn't moving.
11:44I climbed on top of the officers' quarters.
11:50Yet I saw the last of Phillips.
11:53Jack Phillips is absolutely overwhelmed by the impossibility of this situation.
12:02He disappeared, walking aft.
12:09He doesn't say goodbye, he doesn't give any explanation,
12:12there's no clap on the back to his junior.
12:14He's done everything, there's nothing more to do.
12:15The man is ready to die.
12:18At this stage, all the lifeboats on the boat deck have been launched,
12:34and of course there's a panic that there are no lifeboats left.
12:37But there is actually two more stashed away on the roof of the officers' quarters.
12:43Collapsible A and B.
12:45I saw the boat and the men trying to push it off.
12:59They couldn't do it.
13:01I went up to them, lending a hand.
13:03The collapsible lifeboats were very much a secondary option,
13:10which would need to be rigged so they could be used.
13:15Now the crew are trying to launch them in increasingly difficult and desperate conditions.
13:24Just then the ship took a slight but definite plunge.
13:27The sea came rolling up in a wave.
13:35When a large wave washes collapsible A and B overboard,
13:40you've just been given that hope.
13:42But in amongst the chaos, the lifeboats are stolen from you by the elements,
13:46and that is just devastating.
13:50The big wave carried the boat off.
13:51I had hold of an oarlock and went off with it.
14:00Water was washing right across the deck.
14:04And we were in water right to our hips.
14:07Another lurch threw myself off and away from the ship into the water.
14:13I fell into a mass of people.
14:22I was underwater.
14:24I knew I had to fight for it.
14:28The temperature in the water is minus two degrees.
14:32So as soon as that cold water hits the body,
14:35there's a shock reaction and the mind is reacting in a state of panic.
14:38Everything I touched seemed to be woman's hair.
14:46Children crying.
14:49Women screaming.
14:53Their hair in my face.
14:56If only I could forget those hands and faces that I touched.
15:01I could forget those hands and faces that I touched.
15:15The ship was sinking on its head very quickly.
15:18The water was right up to the bridge.
15:22The crowd moved with it, pushing towards the stern.
15:25The sight that doesn't bear dwelling on.
15:29To stand there above the wheelhouse.
15:33Watching the frantic struggles to climb up the slope and deck.
15:37Unable to even hold out a helping hand.
15:42We were a mass of hopeless, dazed humanity.
15:47Trying to keep our final breath until the last possible moment.
15:54I nuked the futility of following that instinct for self-preservation.
16:00It would only be postponing the plunge and prolonging the agony.
16:06Turning to the bridge, I took a header.
16:18Striking the water was like a thousand knives being driven into one's body.
16:24For a few moments I completely lost grip of myself.
16:28We were at the starboard rail to keep away from the crowd.
16:38The ship began to shoot down fast.
16:42The water rushing up towards us.
16:45We had no time to think, only to act.
16:49We wished each other luck.
16:54Then we jumped up on the rail.
16:55Milton looked up at me and he said,
17:00You're coming boy, aren't you?
17:02And I said, uh, go ahead.
17:04I'll be with you in a minute.
17:06Then he'll let go.
17:08The people who choose to jump are ultimately the people who take some form of control in a situation where you're a part of the race.
17:13The people who choose to jump are ultimately the people who take some form of control.
17:17in a situation where you are powerless.
17:18The people who choose to jump are ultimately the people who take some form of control in a situation where you are powerless.
17:35We were about five minutes away from the ship.
17:56But we could still see it as the light stayed on.
18:03The ship stood almost on its nose, slowly sinking.
18:10The people on the Titanic were yelling and crying.
18:17I could see some of them as I jumped into the water.
18:22I found myself drawn against the grating covering a ventilator.
18:42The pressure of the water glued me there.
18:48The shaft led to a stoke hold, a sheer drop of 100 feet right to the bottom of the ship.
18:56I struggled and kicked for all I was worth.
19:00It was impossible to get away.
19:02As fast as I pushed myself off, I was dragged back.
19:09Every instant expecting the wire to go.
19:13To find myself shot down into the bowels of the ship.
19:19The shock of the water took the breath from my lungs.
19:26Down and down I went, spinning in all directions.
19:30The cold was terrific.
19:34Most people think of drowning in a circumstance like this.
19:38It is that ultimately your body runs out of energy.
19:41But actually you can drown as soon as you first hit freezing water.
19:45There's something called cold water shock.
19:48Part of the reaction is to have a big intake of breath and that prepares you for action.
19:52In the case of hitting cold water, it's not in your favour to have a sharp intake of breath.
19:57Some may have cardiac arrest almost immediately because of the shock.
20:05I was still fighting when a blast of hot air came up the shaft and blew me right away from the air shaft and up to the surface.
20:12Finally I came up, my lungs bursting.
20:25The ship was in front of me.
20:29Suddenly the second funnel seemed to be lifted off.
20:33The funnel started to fall right amongst the struggling mass of humanity already in the water.
20:43It missed me by only 20 to 30 feet. The suction of it drew me down.
20:51Those poor people were sucked down in those funnels.
20:57Like flies.
21:01As I came to the surface, my hand came against something.
21:08One of the collapsible lifeboats.
21:10It was floating in the water, bottom side up.
21:14About four or five men clinging on to her.
21:17So I asked them to give me a hand up, which they did.
21:22Sitting on my haunches, holding on for dear life.
21:26It seemed as though hours had passed since I left the ship.
21:32People like Jack and Officer Lightoller are swarming onto Collapsible B upside down using it like a raft in the freezing water.
21:41Just as a way of trying to survive.
21:57The end was very close.
22:02Something in the bowels of the Titanic exploded and sparks shot up to the sky.
22:08Two other explosions followed, dull and heavy, as if below the surface.
22:17The impact was so great, it shook the waters.
22:21And we thought our lifeboat would sink.
22:25Everyone screamed.
22:29The huge weight of seawater in the bows and in the stern
22:33meant that the two things were unable to remain as one part.
22:36The whole superstructure of the ship seemed to split.
22:41The lights suddenly go out and then darkness falls.
22:44The Titanic broke in two before my eyes.
22:45The four part mallowed over and disappeared instantly.
22:49The ship seemed to right herself like a hurt animal with a broken back.
22:50The ship seemed to right herself like a hurt animal with a broken back.
22:55The strange hallucinatory moment.
22:59It looks as though everything's going to be fine.
23:00It looks as though everything's going to be fine.
23:01Because the weird, wonky, distorted angles of the great ship start to settle.
23:02There's people that think that there's some sort of some sort of a
23:06monster that has a wild character and the spirit of the great ship is a
23:09monster.
23:10It's a very strange hallucinatory moment.
23:11It looks as though everything is going to be fine.
23:12The strange, hallucinatory moment, it looks as though everything's going to be fine because
23:22the weird, wonky, distorted angles of the great ship start to settle.
23:29There's people that think that some sort of safety feature has kicked in.
23:34You know, at least this half of the ship is going to somehow survive and those on board
23:38are going to be spared, but ultimately that is short-lived.
23:41I saw the Titanic go up in the air, ever so big.
23:48A huge ship reared herself on end, rudder and propeller clear of the water, till at last
23:58she assumed a perpendicular position.
24:04We saw groups of the 1,500 people still aboard, clinging like swarming bees.
24:11The contents of the Titanic is now falling through it, and tragically people as well.
24:20I think it was only at that moment that many of those poor souls on board realized their
24:27fate.
24:28If we're going to die, I said, it would be best to die gripping something.
24:35We gripped the rail.
24:37A sharp exclamation from my husband.
24:52My God.
24:53She is going now.
24:58The steamer without a sound, except for the shrieks of the people still on board, stood right
25:07on end.
25:09It stood there several moments and slid straight down into the water.
25:23As easily as a pebble in a pond.
25:28Our proud ship.
25:31Our beautiful Titanic.
25:34Everyone around me on the upturned boat breathed.
26:03The two words.
26:04She's gone.
26:05I did not wish to see her go down.
26:18I'm glad that I did not.
26:24My back was turned to her.
26:29We were pulling away.
26:30This is his ship.
26:33This is his company.
26:35And there is intense professional and personal shame here.
26:40I think that was just too overwhelming for him to be able to look.
26:45And there was a deep breath.
26:46That's how it was.
26:47It was just too overwhelming.
26:48It was just a very deep breath.
26:49And there was just a lot of good breath.
26:50It was just a great breath.
26:51Probably a minute passed, with almost dead silence and quiet.
26:53and then an unforgettable cry went up from 1500 despairing throats
27:09Bedlam of shrieks and cries
27:14A nightmare of both sight and sound
27:17hearing desperate disembodied voices in the darkness of the ocean
27:28a cacophony of tears and shouts and despair it's almost like a soundscape of hell
27:37potentially it's your husband your brother your father your loved one's voices
27:42I don't know how you recover from that I've never heard such screams
27:54from the hundreds of people floating about us
28:05they were piercing
28:12it was a horrible row
28:30one young man near me shouting
28:33mother
28:33a man alongside me clutched me around the neck
28:45i choked him off
28:50nobody knows how they'll react in that circumstance you're surrounded by others in a panic with you
28:56you begin to lose the function of your arms the function of your legs the thing that you need to
29:01keep afloat and that can happen extremely quickly because that body's reaction to keep your vital
29:07organs warm is so powerful and it's painful like you are being tortured essentially
29:18the people in the lifeboats are sitting and listening to others die and everyone's response
29:25to that trauma situation will be different
29:31we chatted of little unimportant things as people do when they've been through great mental strain
29:39try to make feeble jokes
29:43i remember i teased miss francatelli
29:46just fancy you left your beautiful nightdress behind you
29:50and we all laughed
29:58though in our hearts we felt very far from laughter
30:04never you mind madam
30:07you were lucky to come away with your lives said one of the sailors
30:11don't you bother about anything you had to leave behind you
30:15lucy's comments sound tone deaf to us but i think they're a trauma response it is far easier to
30:27comprehend the loss of a beautiful piece of clothing she's a fashion designer of course
30:34than it is to wrap their heads around the extraordinary horror of the loss of human life
30:42that they're seeing before them
30:47for those in the water a fatal countdown has begun once severe hypothermia sets in you've got about 15
30:55minutes until you'll become unconscious when i was wounded in afghanistan i knew that that helicopter was
31:03coming but if you don't know that a rescue is imminent how long are you capable of holding on for
31:12a large number of people gave up to struggle and were content to die for the water was
31:20so cold and there seemed no open rescue
31:25when the darkness starts to creep in on you that's when you have to have a real word with yourself
31:29and remind yourself that you still have some fight in you
31:39i swam's door was in a race i got myself away from the crowd behind me there was the horrible volume
31:48of groans which
31:49i can hear them now
31:58i came up to me chum john bannon and i said cheerio johnny and he said
32:08am i right
32:09and start running is a light
32:12then he told me he had seen a flashlight some distance away and pointed out the direction
32:19As I went off, I cried out.
32:22It was so long, Johnny.
32:33Poor chap.
32:38He was drowned.
32:49It was a terrible sight all around.
32:52Men swimming and sinking.
32:55I saw a boat of some kind and I put all my strength
32:58into an effort to swim to it.
33:00It was like work.
33:03I was all done.
33:05When a hand reached from the boat, pulled me aboard.
33:12Collapsible bee that had been stored on the roof of the officers' quarters
33:16was washed off deck and is now the last hope of the men
33:21who jump from the Titanic.
33:24Among the 30 men on Collapsible Bee,
33:27we have Howard Bride, Jack Thayer,
33:30Eugene Daly and Charles Lytolde.
33:34Others came near, nobody gave them a hand.
33:37The bottom-up boat already had more men than it would hold
33:40and was sinking.
33:43We were very low in the water.
33:45Standing, sitting, kneeling, lying in all conceivable positions.
33:51People came up beside us and begged us
33:53to get on this upturned boat.
33:58Saving ourselves, we were obliged to push them off.
34:05One man was alongside us and asked if he could get up on top of it.
34:09We told him that if he did, we would all go down.
34:14His reply was, God bless you. Goodbye.
34:18To look another human being in the eye and say to them,
34:26you're going to have to perish.
34:29Like that is an impossible thing, not just to live through in the moment,
34:32but then to have to live with.
34:34There are 1,500 people in ice-cold water in the Atlantic.
34:42And there are some lifeboats that are full to capacity,
34:46and there's nothing they can do.
34:48But there are many others that are even less than half full.
34:51There are less than 700 people in the lifeboats.
34:56Because the 18 lifeboats are not at capacity,
34:59there's still space for over 400 people.
35:03It could save them from almost certain death.
35:08Within the lifeboats there's an intense dilemma.
35:11Do they go back and save people, or do they stay at a safe distance
35:15so that they don't get overcrowded
35:18and everyone in that lifeboat end up in the water?
35:22These boats are fragile.
35:24They're in the middle of this vast sea.
35:27There's already been tragic and terrible, huge loss of life.
35:31This is their one and only chance to survive.
35:36Three times an officer ordered his men to turn about.
35:41But each time they were prevented from doing so by some of the passengers.
35:47They grasped the oars so that the seamen were forced to give up turning back
35:53to rescue any of the unfortunates.
35:59In the Duff Gordon boat, one of the crew members says,
36:03it's up to us to go back and see if we can pick anyone up.
36:06The Duff Gordons object.
36:08They say they'll be swamped and they persuade the crew not to go back.
36:13At the later inquiry, Cosmo Duff Gordon said,
36:17it's difficult to say what occurred to me.
36:19I was minding my wife and we were in a rather abnormal condition, you know.
36:23I find it chilling that the Duff Gordons are just openly hostile to letting anyone in their lifeboat.
36:32All along, they have been given privileges that other people haven't been given.
36:36And to die slowly in ice-cold water within earshot of people who might save your life, I think there's a particular cruelty to that.
36:46Men and women were going to their death beneath the icy waters of the Atlantic, but I noticed in a hazy detached sort of way.
36:59I've gone through too much in those aisles to think clearly.
37:08Lucy's talking about trauma here.
37:09She's talking about going through so much emotion that she's effectively shutting down.
37:13She's so traumatized, she's not able to get out of her own experience enough to engage with what those people in the water are going through at that time.
37:24The partially filled lifeboats standing by, only a few hundred yards away, never came back.
37:38Why on earth they did not come back is a mystery.
37:43How could any human being fail to heed those cries?
37:46I think it is extremely unfortunate the lifeboats didn't go in and start to rescue people.
37:56They were willing to sit with people screaming and dying in the water, and I find that quite surprising.
38:02We're highly attuned to other people's emotional expressions.
38:06Out on the lifeboats, it's dark and they're quite far away.
38:10So not seeing those faces may be one way of distancing themselves from that suffering.
38:17I became so numb I could hardly swim.
38:25My head was so queer.
38:32But when I was almost at my last gasp I shouted,
38:35Boats are high!
38:39Only off chance that one might be near.
38:41I had room for a dozen more people in my boat.
38:48But it was dark.
38:50We didn't pick up any swimmers.
38:56We all like to think that we'd be the noble one that does the right thing.
39:03But that's not how survival works.
39:06Ultimately as human beings we are animals who have survived.
39:11That's how we've evolved to be what we are.
39:12So survival instinct is absolutely within our DNA.
39:14And so you have no idea what you are capable of until you are pushed to an extreme.
39:21Disasters reveal an aspect of your personality that you might not know is there.
39:26And you might not like being there.
39:28To save your own life, to let hundreds of people die, I think that's something that would weigh heavily on you for the rest of your life.
39:34Perhaps a thousand.
39:39Perhaps more.
39:41Gone down with her.
39:43Gone down with her.
39:57There's a cluster of lifeboats closer to where the Titanic went down.
40:02Including lifeboats 14 and 4.
40:05And this is a kind of case of right place, right time for some people in the water.
40:09Fortunately, my shout was heard.
40:13Over here!
40:15I was hauled into lifeboat number 4.
40:18About seven people are rescued because of that boat, including Thomas Dillon.
40:26I think I'd been 20 minutes in the water.
40:31I was told afterwards I was unconscious for a long time.
40:35I was not properly right when I came to.
40:40Thomas Dillon survived because he's young and he's fit.
40:44But by the time he's picked up by the lifeboat, he's got early symptoms of hypothermia.
40:50I would rather die a hundred times than go through such an experience again.
40:58Mr. Lowe went in search of other lifeboats.
41:17He found four or five and took command of the little fleet.
41:21The whole of you are under my orders.
41:25Lifeboat 14 is very full.
41:27But Lowe realises that actually if this group works together, they have a chance of being able to launch a rescue mission.
41:35He ordered that the boat should be linked together with ropes to prevent any drifting away.
41:41They're able to redistribute those passengers and they actually free up an entire lifeboat which allows them to go in and search for survivors.
41:53I went with just the boat's crew, no passengers.
41:58Of course, I had to wait for the yells and shrieks to subside, for the people to thin out.
42:10Officer Lowe is very aware of the potential risks.
42:15You can be capsized when trying to pull survivors into the vessel.
42:19The vessel can be swamped, but they choose to go back.
42:21They're not just survivors in this moment.
42:24They continue to be crewmen.
42:26Their sense of service, particularly those that had a military background, ultimately outweighs their sense of survival.
42:34Your training just kicks in and you have a responsibility to those around you, even before yourself.
42:39I searched the wreck thoroughly and found four persons.
42:45One was a Mr. Hoyt from New York.
42:52He was bleeding from the mouth.
42:54I loosened his shirt so as to give him every chance to breathe.
43:00But unfortunately, he died.
43:05I suppose he was too far gone when we picked him up.
43:07Most of those who jumped in the sea died within a quarter of an hour.
43:19The awful moaning ceased after that.
43:23We saw nothing but ice and dead bodies.
43:32I remember the very last cry.
43:34It was a man's voice calling loudly.
43:40My God.
43:42My God.
43:43My God.
43:50I think it would have been very haunting to slowly hear fewer and fewer voices.
43:54And that's one of the most traumatic memories that people had, is the sound of those screams.
44:00The air was leaking from under the boat, lowering us further and further into the icy water.
44:22Soaking wet, freezing, the pack of huddled men on Collapsible B have survived so many odds.
44:32But that's all for nothing if nobody comes to your rescue.
44:34And they don't know if that's coming.
44:35Some lost consciousness and slipped overboard.
44:47Every wave threatened to swamp us.
44:48The problem with trying to stay on an upside down boat, which are now using as a raft, is that it's not stable.
44:55This is a balancing act, literally, to save your life.
44:59Every bit of strength and spirit from every one of those men on that boat raft was going to be about staying alive.
45:06Their class differences ceased to be important.
45:12We've got men from first class, men from third, crew members, united by this will to survive.
45:18We prayed and sang hymns.
45:23Harold Bride helped keep our hopes up.
45:27He said time and time again, the Carpathia is coming as fast as she can.
45:33The Carpathia is coming as fast as she can.
45:40Lighthuller found his whistle.
45:45After desperate calling, we got the attention of the other lifeboats.
45:50Two of the boats realized the position we were in and drew toward us.
45:59They had a right-side-up boat.
46:03And it was full to its capacity.
46:08Yet they came to us and loaded us all into it.
46:10Officer Boxall took some green flares from the bridge and now he's lighting them, hoping that he will attract the attention of the approaching rescue vessel.
46:34Time will be standing still.
46:40All they can do is sit in the boats and wait.
46:57About this time, the edge of the sun came above the horizon.
47:02To feel that glowing warmth, which we'd never expected to see again, that's something never to be forgotten.
47:23I have no idea of the passage of time during that awful night.
47:27We were all very tired when we saw a big light.
47:36Look. Look.
47:41The ship.
47:43Suddenly a flicker of hope.
47:46A ship getting closer every minute.
47:52Coming towards the site of the wreck and the lifeboats bobbing about in this freezing, empty sea, finally, is the Carpathia.
48:02She's come as fast as she could through the ice flows, through the night, responding to Jack Phillips' distress calls.
48:10Nothing has ever looked so good to me as the lights from the Carpathia.
48:24Even through my numbness, I began to realize I was saved.
48:33That I would live.
48:35That I would live.
48:44She stopped maybe four miles away.
48:49The task of rowing over to her was one of the hardest things we had to face.
48:54At last, the Carpathia was alongside and people were being taken up by rope ladder.
49:12One man was dead.
49:19I passed him and went up the ladder.
49:29The dead man was Phillips.
49:33He had died on the raft of exposure and cold, I guess.
49:36He stood his ground until the crisis had passed and he collapsed.
49:49Only I could have slipped more clothing on Phillips.
49:58We're just saved him.
50:07When I was wounded, three people lost their lives.
50:11So I know what it's like to trawl over in your head the what could I have done.
50:16And ultimately, life is unpredictable.
50:21You know.
50:23You live or you die.
50:25And you cannot change that fate.
50:27But learning to live with that, it takes time.
50:30It takes time.
50:37No survivor knows better than either.
50:43Cruelty of disappointment.
50:48I had a husband to search for.
50:54A husband whom I believed would be found in one of the boats.
51:00He was not there.
51:08He was not there.
51:16I let myself be saved.
51:21Because I believed he too would escape.
51:25I sometimes envy those whom no human power could tear them from their husband's arms.
51:43What do you remember of the Carpathia?
51:48Uh...
51:50Consoling.
51:52And being consoled.
51:55Consoling.
51:58And being consoled.
52:05My friends were all among the missing when the role was called.
52:09The loss affected me badly.
52:15The big narrative is always going to be about heroism and loss and sacrifice.
52:30But the Titanic was a disaster.
52:33These are real people's lives that are lost.
52:39Real people who suffer.
52:41People who suffer.
52:42People who suffer.
52:43People who suffer.
52:44Holy moly.
52:46And the rent.
52:47The chest was so big.
52:48The need for the two.
52:49And the host.
52:50The訴?
52:51The end.
52:53Of the two.
52:55The chest.
52:56The chest.
52:58The chest.
52:59The engineers were the heroes, I think.
53:20They kept going until minutes before the Titanic went out of sight.
53:25Not a man of them was saved.
53:29In 1912, it was taken for granted that the price of a first-class ticket included a greater
53:38likelihood of surviving.
53:41It was seen as a reflection of the natural order.
53:47What the Titanic teaches us is what happens when people's lives are given unequal value.
53:55Every element, from your breakfast to how you're treated in an emergency, all of that is impacted
54:00by class and hierarchy and status.
54:03This happened in an age where the British stiff upper lip was stiffer than ever.
54:10But the reality is, it doesn't matter how resilient you think you are.
54:14Sometimes we're just not capable of processing that level of horror.
54:18Personal trauma was not recognized.
54:21You just suffered and you carried on.
54:24Those people who survived, they were just now going to have to pick up their lives as best
54:28they could and manage.
54:31These are searing memories that never leave them.
54:34And the grief was huge.
54:37But I like to imagine that there were those who felt that this encounter with death made
54:43them live the rest of their days more fully and that they owed it to those who died to live.
54:49To live.
54:50To live.
54:56To live.
55:01To live.
55:10To live.
55:20To live.
55:23To live.
55:27To live.
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