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Short filmTranscript
00:00Previously, Unheated Rivalry.
00:02Shane Hollander up. I wanted to introduce myself.
00:04Okay.
00:05The two most talked about prospects in the world.
00:07Canada's Shane Hollander and Russia's Elia Rosanoff.
00:11It was Hollander and Rosanoff, right?
00:13We've seen each other a while.
00:15Yeah, Boston and Montreal play against each other often.
00:17What is your room number?
00:19This is such a bad idea.
00:20You're not gonna tell anyone.
00:22Because no one can know.
00:23A whole lot of kids are gonna be looking up to you.
00:25Where's your boy Rosanoff?
00:27My what?
00:28So what's my name gonna be?
00:29Dream.
00:32How much pressure do you feel from the fans, from the hockey world in general?
00:35What was that?
00:36Not everything is about you, Hollander!
00:38What the fuck are you doing in public?
00:40No one is looking at you.
00:41You don't know that.
00:42Hollander, see you next season.
00:59You're in our way.
01:00You're born, see you.
01:02You could've stayed.
01:05You're in our way.
01:07You're in our way.
01:08Que los forever.
01:12Que los forever.
01:16Que los forever.
01:20Que los forever.
01:21Let's go!
01:51Good job, give you a hand, a golden star, you think you're clever, good God, she took a break, made a mistake, when she made driver, que los forever, que los forever, que los forever.
02:21Good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good job, good
02:51I know you're up at night, hushed over your phone like
02:59A tree, a dark, a hill that's crooked from the wind that bites
03:07You say you're lost to seek all the power and the light
03:14You're washed up irrelevant, you're standing in my light
03:22You're standing in my light, you're sta-
03:26You think I'm pretty, you think I'm pretty cool
03:39You say you're scarier than most people do
03:43This is the real world, I'm the end of the world
03:46In spite of everything, I guess there's just no sin in touch
03:51Nice try, now get out of the way
03:54Good job, just take a fucking hit
03:58I said I'll see ya, you wanna be ya, you wanna be ya, ya, ya, ya, ya, ya, ya
04:06Nice try, get out of the way, you're in our way
04:11Hey, if Rosanoff fucks you tonight, I'm gonna fucking back
04:29I think you mean fucks with, buddy
04:31I fucking mean what I mean
04:33You're burning a fake Rosanoff oxide right now
04:35The fuck does that mean?
04:36They do it to you all the time in Boston, you wanna see it?
04:38Uh, no thanks
04:40Honestly guys, it doesn't help me focus
04:42Yeah, Mitty, go be weird somewhere else
04:44I'm not even that much
04:46Whatever you need, Captain
04:48Hey, Hollander, can you talk to NBC and some radio outlets in the next time?
04:52Oh, Mr. Hollander, what does Montreal have to do to win tonight?
05:01Well, hockey is a complicated, nuanced game
05:03But it would be helpful if we scored more fucking goals than the other team
05:06And how about that other team?
05:10Ilya Rosanoff has been on a tear lately
05:12He had a hat-trick last week and he's almost caught up to you in the scoring race
05:15Wanna know what he had to say about that this morning?
05:17Nah, I'll listen if he actually catches up to me
05:18Thanks guys
05:19Mm-hmm
07:22You will murder me.
07:23Maybe.
07:24Get in.
07:26Why the fuck did you think it's okay to sex me before the game?
07:33What the fuck?
07:34You were hard, weren't you?
07:36For how long?
07:37The whole game?
07:38You're such a fucking ass.
07:40You missed me, didn't you?
07:42I fucking didn't.
07:43And I still beat your ass.
07:45Barely.
07:46Oh, nice place.
07:47Thanks.
07:48I bought it a couple years ago, but then this year I bought another one right next door.
08:03I eventually might turn it into one place, but for now I'm renting the next door one out.
08:08Mr. Businessman.
08:10Sure.
08:11Mr. Landlord.
08:13You asked.
08:14No, I didn't.
08:16So what do you want me?
08:18In the kitchen?
08:19On the floor?
08:20Fuck you.
08:21Did your mom buy all these pillows?
08:22No.
08:23I hired someone.
08:24A designer.
08:25You think there is enough?
08:26He's such an asshole.
08:27No.
08:28No.
08:29No.
08:30No.
08:31No.
08:32No.
08:33No.
08:34No.
08:35No.
08:36No.
08:37No.
08:38No.
08:40No.
08:41No.
08:42No.
08:43No.
08:44No.
08:45No.
08:46No.
08:47No.
08:48No.
08:49No.
08:50No.
08:51I think maybe you like it.
08:54And smell the cigarettes from here.
08:57I had one.
08:58You shouldn't be smoking.
09:00And you shouldn't be talking.
09:01Come here.
09:06No, you come here.
09:07No, you come here.
09:08No, you come here.
09:09No, you come here.
09:10No, you come here.
09:21You still won't?
09:24It's double.
09:32Don't worry, it will fit.
09:44Wow, wow.
09:47You think this will be enough?
09:49Fuck off.
09:51Fuck off.
09:58Where were you?
10:06Where were you?
10:14Please don't go.
10:18Please don't go.
10:21Please don't go.
10:25Oh my God.
10:30Stay right here.
10:34He's okay?
10:36He's okay?
10:37He's okay.
10:38He's okay.
10:39He's okay.
10:40He's not in the sky.
10:42He's okay.
10:45He has no power to go.
10:47He's okay.
10:50He's okay.
10:51I was so close.
10:55And you okay?
11:00Yes.
11:02Yes.
11:03Yes.
11:04Yes.
11:05Yes.
11:06Yes.
11:08Yes.
11:10Yes.
11:12Yes.
11:14Yes.
11:16Yes.
11:18Yes.
11:20I'll see you later.
11:28I'll see you later.
11:50Are you...
11:54Oh, God, hold on.
12:20I know the bed's all dirty.
12:25What?
12:27Shut up.
12:32It looks shallow now, okay?
12:50You killed me, Lunder.
12:59I'm dead.
13:02That was so fucking hot.
13:08Worth the way.
13:20I should go.
13:32So, uh, obviously we won't see each other during the Olympics, right?
13:36Oh, right.
13:39Your family must be happy there in Russia.
13:43Mm, yes.
13:45My parents are pretty psyched for me.
13:47I mean, they're pissed they can't come, but my mom is threatening to wake up at 4am to watch every game.
13:55I bet, uh, your parents will be there, right?
13:58My father, yes.
14:00Maybe my brother, but who knows.
14:03Cool.
14:04Anyways, I'm psyched. I've been dreaming about it my whole life.
14:08Dreaming of what? Bronze medal?
14:11You fucking wish, dude.
14:12Hey, uh, remember when I made you come hands-free?
14:20You can fuck yourself, Brosnan.
14:23Such a good drink.
14:25Your cab is definitely here.
14:37Bye.
14:37Bye.
14:38Bye.
14:42Welcome back to Man in the Crease, your all-star hockey podcast.
14:50For the first period, we're four days into this year's Winter Games,
14:53and there's already a contender for top story here at Sochi Rucks.
14:57What an embarrassing and too embarrassing year for the Russian men's hockey team.
15:01A hard pill to swallow on all mice,
15:04and especially for the young phenom Ilya Rosanoff,
15:07chosen as his country's captain.
15:09All right there.
15:37Hey, what's up, motherfucker?
15:39Boys.
15:40Holy fuck, can you believe Russia?
15:41Be nice, Vonnie.
15:42Be nice to fucking last to Latvia.
15:44Did you see that game?
15:45Yeah, it was a straight-up shit show.
15:47A debacle.
15:48Hey, what did Ross say about it?
15:50Uh, I don't know.
15:51Nothing to me, that's for sure.
15:53I think he knows Canada has this in the bag.
15:55Uh-uh.
15:56It's you going to say this year, baby.
15:57We're fucking coming for you.
15:58Okay.
15:58Trust me.
15:58You look great in silver, Vonnie.
16:00Don't even stress.
16:00Oh, good one.
16:01Yeah.
16:01Does your room have that smell?
16:06Yes.
16:07Yes, it does.
16:08Is it black mold?
16:10Because that's what JJ thinks it is.
16:11Yeah.
16:11He's probably right.
16:12The good news is, we're not going to be here long.
16:14All right, so tonight we can do the men's short form figure skating.
16:16My buddy Joe is in that program.
16:18We're training together.
16:19Would you guys be cool to do that?
16:21I'd love to show up for him.
16:22Hell yeah, man.
16:23Show up for any dude who's that brave.
16:24What do you mean?
16:29Well, I'm assuming your buddy might be gay.
16:32I mean, if I can pray for a dude to show up to a place like this and be like,
16:36Hey, here's me.
16:38Russia is not safe for folks like that.
16:41Fucking balls of steel, man.
16:54Man, your buddy fucking killed it.
17:16Yeah, he did.
17:20I'm just going to find the bathroom.
17:24Hey.
17:46I'm not here.
17:47No, I'm not.
17:50I saw you up here.
17:51I wanted to see how you're doing.
17:53Fine.
17:53Go sit down.
17:58We...
17:58We are not anything.
18:02Go away, Hollander.
18:09Are you okay?
18:12Please, go.
18:14You didn't answer my text.
18:17No, I did not answer your boring text.
18:20Now you go.
18:22Fine.
18:23Fuck.
18:37Fuck.
18:37You need to meet your father.
18:39Yes, my father.
18:42Minister still wants to meet you today evening.
18:45No matter what you want.
18:49This is my honor.
18:50You must be proud of my honor.
18:52After yesterday, you won...
18:58...Latvian.
18:59...Latvian.
19:02And he's still drinking.
19:03How did you do it?
19:05It's not a shame?
19:06It's not a shame, father.
19:08Well, it's not a shame.
19:09They don't teach you discipline in this American League.
19:12It's not a game, it's a shame.
19:14It's not a shame.
19:16It's not a shame that you showed up in the childhood.
19:20I'm playing better than when I was born.
19:23Our team is damaged.
19:25The team is not played.
19:26It's played?
19:27What's that for American absurdity?
19:29What's it played?
19:31You, captain, you make them played.
19:34You always find someone who's wrong with you.
19:36From the childhood.
19:42Who is it to you?
19:46Your mother?
19:47She doesn't know how to do it.
19:53No, my father.
19:57My mother died.
19:58You remember?
20:00I was in your view of your father.
20:00Where is it?
20:02Where is it?
20:02In Moscow?
20:04Of course.
20:04We need to go.
20:06Where is it?
20:08Where is it?
20:08In Moscow?
20:10Of course.
20:12Of course.
20:14We need to go.
20:14We need to go.
20:16In the evening.
20:19To be able to meet me.
20:21In the evening.
20:24To be able to meet him with the minister.
20:29Yes.
20:30Are you ready?
20:31Let's go.
20:32Of course, I was always on the same.
20:36Everything is over.
20:38I made a decision.
20:40What did you do?
20:42He was not in the form.
20:44He has to be home.
20:46He has been in the United States.
20:48He works well.
20:50He's good.
20:52He's not good.
20:54He's a problem with leadership.
20:56It's always a problem.
20:58You are too much talking to me.
21:08My angel, you talk too much, especially when it comes to hockey.
21:14Only when we win, dad.
21:16I drive her in a bar, and she needs one more.
21:21Look how she is behind you.
21:24From the very little bit.
21:27I'm an angel.
21:28It would be wonderful if I could remember it.
21:31I want to drink.
21:33I want to drink.
21:34I want to drink some more.
21:36I want to drink some more.
21:37I want to drink some more.
21:39I want to drink some more.
21:40I want to drink some more.
21:45I want to drink some more.
21:46I want to drink some more.
21:47I want to drink some more.
21:48I want to drink some more.
21:49I want to drink some more.
21:50I want to drink some more.
21:51I want to drink some more.
21:52I want to drink some more.
21:53I want to drink some more.
21:54I want to drink some more.
21:55I want to drink some more.
21:56I want to drink some more.
21:57I want to drink some more.
21:58I want to drink some more.
21:59I want to drink some more.
22:00I want to drink some more.
22:01I want to drink some more.
22:02I want to drink some more.
22:04I think you played bad.
22:05I'll say thank you, but I know, that you're not even looking at any
22:10play.
22:11For the people who have been the son of a肉 training, you know this,
22:15I'm not sure.
22:16I suffer any harm.
22:18When I ask for what to do, I look for a man.
22:23Every case, it is not to you.
22:25It doesn't matter?
22:26Why did you do so?
22:28My father...
22:29Your father...
22:30You're a fool, who will ever kill you.
22:32You need to stop worrying about what he thinks.
22:36You don't care about these crazy games,
22:39when you have a real chance to win this year.
22:42Really?
22:43Yes, it's true.
22:44Huntry and Admiral won't go through New Jersey.
22:46New Jersey won't go through Holland and Montreal.
22:50I think you will win this year.
22:53This year?
22:54Yes, this year.
22:55I think he was traumatized.
23:00Why do you know everything?
23:02On the next three sides.
23:04With traumatized brothers, you can't get there.
23:07You can't get there with the team.
23:09It's pretty good.
23:11Let's go.
23:13This is the West Coast,
23:14and then you can win.
23:15You can win whoever you want in the West.
23:18In Chicago, not just before.
23:21In the final, it will be San Francisco.
23:24They are good, but they are too young.
23:27So you will win the Cup of San Francisco
23:29in a year before,
23:30than I did with my father.
23:36No, thank you.
23:37It's time to sleep.
23:38Tomorrow you should look perfect.
23:40You should look perfect.
23:41You always look perfect.
23:43That's right.
23:44But you need to agree more.
23:47I'll see you again soon.
23:48Let's見 Aí in the next listen.
23:51Before you.
23:52Well, how are you, Sasha?
24:02Wow, it's cool.
24:06I just love this place.
24:09Clubs?
24:11It's my head.
24:13Boys.
24:15It's just a nice place.
24:17And boys?
24:19Well...
24:22You've seen the French people.
24:25Right?
24:32Oh my God.
24:34Nothing.
24:37You don't know anything like that.
24:41You don't lie.
24:43You don't flirt at the answer.
24:49But, before you were happy.
24:56You remember?
25:08Are you here?
25:10Seriously?
25:12The danger that you had before.
25:15If your memory doesn't change me.
25:19We're not kids, Sasha.
25:23Yes.
25:24That's right.
25:25Stop.
25:26Okay.
25:27Let's go somewhere.
25:29Let's go somewhere.
25:30No.
25:31Okay.
25:32Let's go somewhere.
25:33No.
25:34Okay.
25:35Let's go somewhere.
25:36No.
25:37Okay.
25:38I'll find the evening.
25:39Okay.
25:40Okay.
25:41Okay.
25:52I'll find the evening.
25:55Okay.
25:56What happened here?
26:26Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
26:29Just fucking know. What am I supposed to do?
26:32I don't know. My mom told me to give away.
26:34Oh my God.
26:35You said you could have a good home, honey.
26:37There's ginger ale in the pitch.
26:39Okay, playoffs are over. You cannot keep the beer.
26:41That's not a rule. You just make that up.
26:43Hollander, is that a rule?
26:44Unfortunately, it is.
26:45Fuck you, Hollander. You can barely even grow one.
26:47No, no. Fuck you, Swedish inbred.
26:49Fuck you, AJ.
26:51Just fucking do it, Hayden.
26:53Stop!
26:54Boys, it's starting.
26:56Turn it up.
26:57It's game six and the cup is somewhere inside as we speak.
27:00You know that Ilya Rozanov wants this bad.
27:03Rozanov and the Raiders have been on fire since the Olympic break.
27:06A heartbreaking game for the Russians seems to have only intensified the young Boston captain.
27:11He's on a chair, scoring ten goals over the past six playoff games.
27:16Okay, listen the fuck up.
27:18Look, I don't give a fuck how many goals I've scored.
27:23I don't give a fuck how I played two fucking nights ago.
27:26I don't need to think about that. That was yesterday. That was before.
27:30Now, I only need one thing.
27:35I need to win.
27:39Here, at home, tonight.
27:43As much fun as it would be to go to California and humiliate them there.
27:47But I want to hear our fans.
27:49I want to hear them scream.
27:52I want to fuck San Francisco.
27:55I know you can do it.
27:58I've seen you fucking do it.
28:00I've seen every one of you do it.
28:02So leave it all the fuck out there tonight.
28:05Because this is our fucking night.
28:11This is our fucking cup.
28:14Fucking fuck San Francisco!
28:22Praise the fuck.
28:23We'll fuck you.
28:28I can't believe that asshole's about to win the cup.
28:31Shane hates him the most.
28:33What?
28:34You ate Rosanoff.
28:36Of course.
28:37But...
28:38He's very good at hockey.
28:40The best, probably.
28:41Eh, nah.
28:42You're the fucking best all-hander.
28:44Okay?
28:45Not that animal shit-show cock-sucking Russian.
28:49That is that.
28:50The Boston Raiders are your MLH champions.
28:54What a comeback story this year for Ilya Rosanoff.
28:57The captain did absolutely everything in these playoffs.
29:00Leading his team in block shots.
29:02The team shows the kids.
29:03And obviously...
29:04The Boston Raiders.
29:05The Boston Raiders.
29:06The Boston Raiders.
29:07The Boston Raiders.
29:09The Boston Raiders.
29:10The Boston Raiders.
29:11Wow, nice watch.
29:38Can I give this to you for free or what?
29:40Where the fuck were you, Ronald?
29:41Five seconds.
29:42Yeah, 25 seconds.
29:43Or even doing.
29:45And now, presenting the Lord Tower Award from...
29:49I was busy.
29:50Was who?
29:51...Ilya Rosanoff and Shane Hallmark.
30:00But the most important thing...
30:02...is the frames we make along the way.
30:06Hey!
30:07Before we give out next award, can I get a selfie with you?
30:11What?
30:12Come on!
30:13When will this ever happen again, buddy?
30:15Okay, fine, but hurry up.
30:17Great.
30:18Give me your number.
30:19I'll text them to you.
30:20No chance.
30:21And the Lord Tower Award for most sportsmanlike player goes to...
30:54What?
30:55What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
30:59What?
31:00What?
31:01What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:05What?
31:06What?
31:07What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:09You haven't answered a text from me in like six months.
31:12You won't even acknowledge I exist unless there's a fucking camera pointed at us and then it's for some fucking clown show.
31:17So yeah, what the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:18What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:19What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:20What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:21You haven't answered a text from me in like six months.
31:22You won't even acknowledge I exist unless there's a fucking camera pointed at us and then it's for some fucking clown show.
31:24So yeah, what the fuck do you actually want from me?
31:25Well?
31:26You won't even acknowledge I exist unless there's a fucking camera pointed at us and then it's for some fucking clown show.
31:32So yeah, what the fuck do you actually want from me?
31:37Well?
31:41I want you to suck my dick.
31:42Oh, fuck you!
31:43You are unbelievable.
31:44You suck my dick.
31:55Maybe you ask nicely.
32:09Please.
32:14If you want me to get on my knees on this filthy bathroom floor and suck your dick,
32:19we'll have to ask nicer than that.
32:21If you want me to get on my knees, please get on your knees on this filthy bathroom floor
32:29and suck my dick.
32:33Please.
32:44No.
32:48What?
32:51No.
32:53We'll go back to our seats, watch the rest of this boring show, and then go to boring party
32:59after.
33:01And then, when you have been waiting all night, you'll come back to my hotel room, and I will
33:08maybe, maybe, do more than just suck your dick.
33:12When did your English get so good?
33:19I, uh, I read the New Yorker now.
33:22Really?
33:23No.
33:24The New Yorker is boring.
33:28My dad loves it.
33:31Ah.
33:32So being boring is, is genetic.
33:34You're a good boy.
33:35Wow.
33:36And I do.
33:42Let's make a deal.
33:45If you win MVP tonight, I will blow you, fuck you, whatever you want.
33:49And if you win.
33:53And if you win.
33:53Good luck coming.
34:12And if you win, you're going to be in the middle of this place, they're going to be in the middle of this position.
34:30Congratulations.
35:01Now take off your clothes.
35:04You're such an asshole.
35:30What?
35:36Just a lot of windows.
35:54Good.
36:00Now get on the bed.
36:19This is a good hotel.
36:28Very nice vodka.
36:30It's hard to find in America.
36:31Okay.
36:32Okay.
36:36Touch yourself.
36:37What?
36:38Show up for me.
36:39I want to watch you.
36:40You what?
36:42It's my special day, Hollander.
36:43I want to watch.
36:44I've never...
36:45I've never...
36:46No shit.
36:47Fuck you.
36:49Give me some vodka at least.
36:50No, no, no.
36:52Vodka is for after.
36:53It's your reward.
36:54It's my pleasure.
37:03I'm going to watch you.
37:04I want to watch you.
37:05I want to watch you.
37:06Do you want to know how it feels?
37:32How it feels?
37:34Holding the cup.
37:36You fucking asshole.
37:38I can barely describe it.
37:40Oh my God, all in there.
37:55Fuck.
38:04Are you going to fuck me?
38:06We will see.
38:10I need you.
38:13What?
38:15You know.
38:16Tell me.
38:20You.
38:24I need you.
38:27I need you.
38:28I need you.
38:28I need you.
38:29I need you.
38:30I need you.
38:30I need you.
38:31I need you.
38:31I need you.
38:32I need you.
38:32I need you.
38:32I need you.
38:33I need you.
38:33I need you.
38:34I need you.
38:34I need you.
38:34I need you.
39:05So Russia this year was something else?
39:35It's intense there.
39:41So are you heading back soon?
39:44Back.
39:46To Russia for the summit?
39:49Oh, yes.
39:50Yes.
39:57Why?
39:59What do you mean, why?
40:02Do you have to?
40:03There is no have to, it's home.
40:10Yeah, but I don't know, is it safe?
40:16What do you mean safe?
40:18I don't know.
40:19Do you, do you even like it there?
40:30What difference does it make?
40:32A pretty big one, I think.
40:34I need to sleep.
40:43Oh.
40:45Yeah, me too, I should have.
40:47So, uh, I'm off.
41:00Goodbye, Hollander.
41:00Goodbye, Hollander.
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