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  • 21 hours ago
The best spear in wrestling is contended. The worst is not.
Transcript
00:00The three's this ain't ballet pal gets thrown about a lot but wrestling does have plenty in
00:05common with dance. On a surface level it's about crafting something that looks pleasing to the
00:09viewer's eye. It should be said that not only are the men and women on this list better at fake
00:13fighting than you or I, they could very easily beat me in a real fight and turn me into a puddle
00:18formerly known as Psy from WhatCulture. Still every fan will have their own take on who were
00:23the best at making moves look great and who were the worst. I'm the future Puddle of Psy from
00:28WhatCulture Wrestling and this is 10 wrestlers who couldn't do their own moves.
00:32Number 10. The Rock's Sharpshooter. Though he didn't invent it, it's fair to say that the
00:37sharpshooter was made famous by Bret Hart. The master of the move was asked in 2021 by Fightful's
00:43Sean Ross Sapp about his colleagues who also tried to apply it and he was quick to point out that
00:47The Rock had always had trouble putting it on. Looking at Hart's take on the move it's clear to
00:52see why it's beloved. The hitman makes the crossing over of his and his opponent's legs as well as his
00:56subtle hand placement look easy. He pulls at his opponent to turn them over demonstrating their
01:01weight and pushes in deep to apply pressure. This is what submission moves are all about after all,
01:06pressure and control. The Rock had very little of either when he began applying the sharpshooter
01:11onwards from 2000. Often crossing legs over the wrong way and looking as weak as pond water,
01:16The Rock's sharpshooter has been chastised by both fans and wrestlers themselves. Still Rocky got it over
01:22because it was the Attitude Era and at this point he could almost do no wrong.
01:25Number 9, CM Punk's Elbow Drop. Whilst there may or may not be legitimate heat between CM Punk and
01:31Kenta over Punker's usage of the Goat to Sleep, it's hardly the only move in the Second City Saints
01:36repertoire that he's adopted from another. Occasionally Punk will take it to the top rope,
01:40point to the sky and drop an elbow like Macho did back in his prime. Although perhaps not exactly like
01:46Macho did. Not only was Savage capable of getting some impressive air, he was able to lean into the blow
01:51mid-flight. Macho was a marksman with the elbow, always leading it to its mark and making it look
01:55devastating. With Punk, he often falls in a bit of a heap. Yes, the elbow is extended, but it's not
02:00the singular point of impact. CM Punk himself made fun of this in a 2020 tweet when the WWE on Fox
02:06Twitter account put him amongst Randy Savage, Shawn Michaels and Kairi Sane as the best elbow drops in
02:12the biz, saying, this isn't a list I should be on. So at least he has good humour about it.
02:17Number 8, The Miz's Figure 4 Leg Lock. There are some stars that are just born
02:21to be heels. Not that The Miz isn't funny or charming when he wants to be, but there's just
02:25something so delightfully punchable about his on-screen persona. Ergo, he needs all the help
02:29he can get during his rare babyface runs. In 2012, WWE paired him with the legendary Ric Flair
02:34in a forgettable mentor and student story. In this time, Flair bequeathed his most deadly move
02:40to the A-lister. And whilst Miz doesn't lock the Figure 4 Leg Lock in quite as impressively as Flair did,
02:45where it really falls down is an overall performance issue. Miz doesn't use it to tell a story,
02:49he skips right to the end. Be of his own volition, or the time he's given, Miz never really bothers
02:54to work his opponent's leg during any given match. He never has, and he likely never will. As such,
02:59this already vapid hand-me-down of a move is less impactful as the prior punishment that makes it
03:04so effective is missing. More than this, Flair would spend minutes applying the lock, steadily
03:08becoming more intense to amp up the atmosphere. It's what made it so memorable. When Miz applies
03:13the Figure 4, he's heaving and grimacing that punchable face before he's even hit the mat.
03:17Number 7, Charlotte Flair's Moonsault. Being able to flip your entire body over midair is insanely
03:23impressive. It's a skill that requires a bit of rewiring of your instincts that tell you that
03:27your feet should stay on the ground, and by no means should your head ever be below them. The
03:31Moonsault is perhaps even worse since the move is done backwards, facing away from your landing spot.
03:36That being said, just because you're able to flip doesn't mean you've mastered a move. As Charlotte
03:41Flair demonstrates on a frequent basis, timing your rotation is imperative, as is making sure you stick
03:46the landing. It probably doesn't help either that she's very tall, and even more so that she has a
03:50history of cheerleading, so it's in her nature to land on her feet. As it is, most of her moonsault
03:54landings are rough at best, as she flips too soon and lands on her ankles rather than pressing her
03:59opponent flat. On the other hand, moonsaulting to the outside of the ring means she at least has to
04:04land on her feet, which she does almost every time. Shame then that her standing moonsault always misses
04:09her opponents by so much that she may as well have jumped off the turnbuckle and landed in a different
04:13area code. Number 6, Shane McMahon's punches. Shane McMahon is about the furthest you can get from
04:18technical wrestling. Even in his younger years, jumping into his dad's ring to play alongside all
04:22those pro athletes, nobody ever pretended that he was more than a glorified stuntman. And he was great
04:28at this, so it distracted crowds for some time from his god-awful fundamentals. Since his return in 2016,
04:34though, McMahon has been the subject of mockery for what are surely the world's worst worked punches.
04:38As a passionate fan of MMA and trained in Muay Thai and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Shane leans too far into
04:44wanting to look realistic. His swift and incredibly short movements are all clearly inspired by boxing
04:50jabs. However, this is just not how things are done in wrestling. Full arm extension and thrust are the
04:55name of the game, and Shane displays neither. It's hard enough to take the boss's jumpy upstart son
05:00seriously as a legitimate fighter in his own right, but it's the seriousness with which Shane seems to
05:05present himself. He probably whispers sweet nothings to that best wrestler in the world
05:09trophy every night. Number 5, John Cena's STF. In a 2020 episode of WWE's Untold series, Edge recalled
05:17his match with Cena at Unforgiven 2006. He tells the story of how big match John accidentally choked
05:22him until he passed out via a nasty combination of STF and ladder. Though he laughs it off in a way
05:28that pro wrestlers do, since it's just a part of their job, it's a harrowing visual and thought.
05:32And clearly it had an effect on Cena, because ever since that moment, his submission hold has gone
05:37from being genuinely dangerous to looking absolutely ludicrous. To be fair, that is pretty good reason
05:42to adapt a move, but there has to be a happy medium. To give it its full name is to describe it perfectly,
05:47the stepover to hold face lock. Edgy fans of WWE's ruthless aggression days might lament that the name
05:53of Cena's move went from the STFU, ha ha ha, back to the simple STF, when the PG era rolled around.
06:00But in truth, it's been more of an ST this whole time. When Cena cinches it in, there's no face
06:05lock. Not only does this mean Cena isn't putting pressure on his victim's spine, which is the point
06:10of the full body hold, but it's clear to anyone watching that escaping it would need little more
06:14than a duck of the head. Number 4, John Cena's Springboard Stunner. John Cena was a fantastic
06:20figurehead for WWE's promotional appeal. In the ring, his character is a great role model. Outside of
06:25wrestling, he's a promising actor and an honourable humanitarian. It's a shame that his actual wrestling
06:30has always been so limited, because everywhere else he succeeds. And while Cena is known for,
06:35and has largely got by on his five moves of doom, he occasionally adds a sixth. Cena's victory over
06:41Rusev at WrestleMania 31 is a sour taste many WWE fans remember, but there was something else that
06:47night that caught everyone off guard. In a show of otherwise rarely seen creativity, Cena hit his first
06:52Springboard Stunner by running into the ropes, bouncing off of them, and taking his opponent
06:57down with a cutter. On first viewing, it's kind of cool, because it is so surprising. But even
07:02occasionally when it didn't look bad, it still never looked great. The momentum of Cena running
07:07one way and then suddenly moving towards his opponent backwards made for an awkward sell. And most of the
07:12time, Cena could never get his hands around his dance partner's head precisely. Cena used the
07:16Springboard Stunner for all of about six months in 2015, in a period that is fondly remembered as some of
07:22his best in-ring work. Despite a move that the commentary consistently had to remark as one
07:27he never, quote, got all of. Number three, Eva Marie's Sliced Red. Eva Marie's moveset really got
07:33more complex than running sentons and back elbows. However, in 2015, All Red Everything returned to
07:39the company after a hiatus with a surprising new move passed on to her by her trainer, Brian Kendrick.
07:45Sliced Bread number two demonstrated the beauty of fluid wrestling drilled down to one perfect
07:50second. Kendrick would run almost vertically up the turnbuckles with his opponent in tow,
07:54rotating over them and forcing them onto their back. It was a move that exemplified the Cruiser
07:58Wake's agility and finesse. Now credit where credit is due, it's not an easy move to pull off because
08:03in order to look good, it requires a lot of confidence and careful footwork. These are things
08:08Marie rarely managed to demonstrate as it felt like WWE were always shoving her onto TV well before
08:13she was ready. So this is very much a case of running, up the ropes in fact, before you can really walk.
08:19Marie's Sliced Red had all the flat footedness of a baby deer and looked like someone climbing a
08:23particularly imposing staircase in roller skates. It was clear that her opponents were doing most
08:28of the work to make sure everyone got out of it safely. It's probably not surprising that her next
08:32gimmick had her finding excuses to not wrestle and we were all better for it. Number two,
08:38Billy Kidman's Shooting Star Press. The Shooting Star Press might be one of wrestling's most beautiful
08:42moves. The end over end rotating flip from the top rope requires grace and precision to hit perfectly.
08:48On the one hand, there are those that believe that Billy Kidman was one of the most entertaining
08:52acts of his time. He was also one of the first men to bust out a shooting star press on TV,
08:56instantly creating conversation amongst fans. And sometimes it looked incredible, but only
09:02sometimes. Quite a lot of the time it looked like Kidman had beef with gravity. He barely got any air,
09:08his rotations were late and his landings were sloppy. If you can't pull off a move time after time and
09:12make it look picture perfect, especially in Vince McMahon's clinical sports entertainment world,
09:17then you should perhaps reconsider it, doubly so, if it has the potential to be dangerous.
09:22Unlike other entries in this list, Kidman couldn't do his move for more reasons beyond his own
09:28inconsistency. In an August 2004 episode of Smackdown, Kidman hit one of his worst attempts at the
09:33Shooting Star Press on Chavo Guerrero, landing wrong and with some serious velocity. He drove his knee
09:38into Chavo's head, legitimately concussing his opponent. As such, the SSP was blacklisted at the
09:44company, meaning that both Kidman and his tag partner Paul London had to find new signature
09:49moves. And number one, Edge's Spear. It's the job of wrestling announce teams, as much as the in-ring
09:54workers themselves, to sell. Commentators will tell you how impactful something is supposed to be with
10:00how they react to it. But without any distractions, and with the right comparisons, it's fair to say that
10:05Edge's finisher is not as powerful as Michael Cole's frenzied calls of SPEAR implies.
10:10The spear has been a signature move for a great number of major stars, Roman Reigns and Goldberg
10:15among them, in part because it's a simple and understandable technique. The attacker throws
10:20their entire weight into an airborne tackle, taking their opponent down to the mat, and perhaps most
10:25importantly, knocking the wind out of them by burying their shoulder into their enemy's gut.
10:29Except Edge doesn't do this, and he never really has. He wraps his opponent in an embrace,
10:34pushing the flat of his bicep into them. Despite being part of some of the company's most re-watched
10:39moment, Edge's spear has always more resembled a running hug when properly scrutinised. This was
10:44exemplified the most during his runs where he assembled a three-man team alongside Rhino.
10:49Rhino's spear might have gotten a unique title inspired by his namesake, but it deserved its
10:54own moniker because of just how deadly it looked. It didn't even need Joey Styles losing his mind
10:59chanting gore, gore, gore on commentary. Although, let's face it, it didn't hurt either. Now, I'm sure I've
11:05just upset some super fans of these particular wrestlers, but as I say, this is all done in good
11:09fun. If you are going to go down to those comments, either to tell me what for or to give me other
11:14examples, wrestlers that couldn't do their own moves, make sure to hit like on the way and make
11:18sure you're subscribed. Head up to whatculture.com for more content every day. I've been signed for
11:22WhatCulture, and have a good week.
11:25WhatCulture, and have a good week.
11:31WhatCulture, and have a good week.
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