- 1 hour ago
New Hallmark Christmas Movie 2025 _ A Heartwarming Holiday Comedy Romance
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Oh, yes, just like Christmas.
00:00:11I'm cut.
00:00:12Can we take five?
00:00:13Aubrey, can we just take five?
00:00:16Five.
00:00:16Take five.
00:00:18Hi.
00:00:18Hey, you good?
00:00:20Let me tell you, when my taste buds grow back.
00:00:23Well, if you get it in the next egg, you won't have to drink anymore.
00:00:26I can't do it.
00:00:27What do you mean you can't?
00:00:29Uh, I'm sober now.
00:00:31It's not alcoholic.
00:00:33You're joking.
00:00:34Uh, what do you propose we do?
00:00:36I'll fill it up with paint thinner.
00:00:38It'd go down a lot easier.
00:00:39Ladies!
00:00:40Uh, just one second, please.
00:00:42Okay, I can go grab a bucket, and then you can take a sip, and then you can spit it right out,
00:00:47and then they can, um, they can cut to a shot of a bottle or something.
00:00:49Can you handle that?
00:00:51Okay, but don't you ever say that I never did anything for you.
00:00:55Well, we don't have all day to go over everything that is wrong about the sentence you just said.
00:00:59I'd love to listen to you, darling, but I'm kind of trapped in that moment.
00:01:03Okay.
00:01:04I, uh, will go speak to the director.
00:01:06Oh!
00:01:07Oh!
00:01:08Oh!
00:01:08Oh!
00:01:09Oh!
00:01:09The thing is, uh, when Bella was six years old, the color green was very triggering for her.
00:01:17Oh, darlings, thank you so much.
00:01:20You were all so wonderful to work with.
00:01:24Oh!
00:01:24Now, if you ever need tickets to the comedy club, just reach out to Aubrey, day or night.
00:01:32Day, please.
00:01:34Okay, we need to get downtown ASAP, okay?
00:01:36What for?
00:01:38For the interview, I sent you the questions last night.
00:01:40Did you pick your favorite Christmas memory?
00:01:42I can't, because the really good ones, I can't remember, and the other ones, I'd be breaking an NDA to share them.
00:01:48What am I going to say?
00:01:50Bella, you pay me to write your jokes, not your life story.
00:01:53What about when you were writing my autobiography?
00:01:55There must be something there.
00:01:57We didn't get past the chapter on prenups.
00:01:59Oh.
00:02:00Okay.
00:02:00You said last Christmas was your favorite ever.
00:02:03Why don't we work off of something like that?
00:02:04It was great.
00:02:05My set just killed.
00:02:06I booked two late-night gigs out of that.
00:02:09I just want to be more relatable, you know?
00:02:13I don't want to be all show business-y.
00:02:15I want to be more ordinary, you know, like you or one of them.
00:02:19Okay, uh, okay, when I was a kid growing up, all my cousins, aunts and uncles, they would
00:02:24stay over on Christmas Eve so we could open the get-together in the morning, and, oh, this
00:02:28was my time to shine.
00:02:30Aubrey, if you're trying to convince me to never have children,
00:02:33darling, that ship has sailed.
00:02:36But Mom actually would stop me at 8 p.m. to honor Santa's favorite song, Silent Night,
00:02:41because she said that Santa actually wouldn't fill my stockings if I played the part of Tiny
00:02:47Tim after sundown.
00:02:48And, you know, when I think about it now, actually, I think she was...
00:02:51And you know, Santa was right, darling.
00:02:53Shh.
00:02:55I'm almost dizzy from listening to you.
00:02:58Now, make that a whole lot shorter and a whole lot funnier, we got an interview on
00:03:04our hands.
00:03:05I-I was, uh, being vulnerable, but...
00:03:08Oh, yeah.
00:03:09Yeah, I got the door.
00:03:12Aubrey?
00:03:17I really hope those deliveries get here today.
00:03:21But all these people performed here?
00:03:24Yep, it actually used to be a speakeasy back in the 20s before becoming a hotspot for comedians.
00:03:30Mike Baxter?
00:03:31I love his movies.
00:03:33Oh, the old ones before he started playing addicts and fathers.
00:03:37What?
00:03:37No, I love those.
00:03:39His comedy's, I don't know, a little bit too juvenile for me.
00:03:41Well, this is early stuff, right after Saturday's Sketch Club.
00:03:45With all these people here, how could you not sell out the Christmas variety show?
00:03:49Because none of these people ever came back to the club.
00:03:51No, no, they work on their material on our small suburban stage, and then they ride off
00:03:57into the sunset.
00:03:59So, who do you have booked so far?
00:04:02We've got a couple of local bands, ooh, and a Mark Twain impersonator, although he says
00:04:07he only does late Twain.
00:04:08This is not my fault.
00:04:09Everybody is booked for the holidays.
00:04:12Because what happens if you don't sell it out?
00:04:14Well, let's see.
00:04:15I lose my job, hopes and dreams dash, five of the best years of my life wasted, ooh,
00:04:20and I get to move back in with my mom.
00:04:22So, there's that.
00:04:22Ooh, yikes.
00:04:24The club's not that big.
00:04:26How hard could it be to sell it out?
00:04:27On Christmas Eve, the one night where people actually prefer to stay home with their families,
00:04:32it's not going to be easy.
00:04:33Yeah, I guess Santa is the only one you ever hear about leaving his home on Christmas
00:04:37Eve, huh?
00:04:39You think I'm doomed?
00:04:42I will start by putting this on the platform.
00:04:44Oh, actually, do you mind signing for the deliveries, and then I will manage to get this
00:04:49guy up there.
00:04:50Yeah.
00:04:51Okay.
00:04:52Oh!
00:04:53We're heavy.
00:04:54Okay.
00:04:55All right.
00:04:56Two steps left.
00:05:06Mmm.
00:05:07My right, actually.
00:05:08Spin!
00:05:09Big spin.
00:05:10Excellent form.
00:05:11Will you two be performing at the open mic on Thursday?
00:05:14Well, he's a little shy, because last time he melted in front of...
00:05:18Mike.
00:05:21Baxter, what are you doing here?
00:05:25Hi, just seeing if I have a future in choreography.
00:05:28Hi, Mike.
00:05:28Hi.
00:05:29What's your name?
00:05:30Oh, uh, Aubrey Wilson.
00:05:31Sorry, I didn't, uh, just, I didn't care about yours.
00:05:33No, I'm, I'm sorry for the frosty dance.
00:05:37I, uh, I just thought I'd stop by.
00:05:39This is where I got my big break.
00:05:40I saw that the...
00:05:41Mike Baxter?
00:05:42Is that you, Mike Baxter?
00:05:44Shouldn't you be out losing millions of dollars for a studio somewhere?
00:05:48Bella Del Domino.
00:05:50They told me to take the season off.
00:05:52Something about Chapter 11?
00:05:53I don't know.
00:05:54But what brought you back here from the mount?
00:05:57Oh, you know, Christmas is a time for charity.
00:05:59So I started thinking, who do I know that needs help the most?
00:06:02And immediately you came to mind.
00:06:04Oh, still as sweet as ever.
00:06:07Tell me, how does a guy get stage time these days, huh?
00:06:09Oh, come on, Mike.
00:06:10You're a big Hollywood star.
00:06:12You don't need to be doing stand-up.
00:06:13Oh, please.
00:06:13Oh, it sounds like my agent already got to you.
00:06:15Well, I'm up for this big action movie.
00:06:18A superhero thing called Rooster Man.
00:06:21It's a working title.
00:06:23Aha!
00:06:23Will the special effects people, will they be able to finally make you funny?
00:06:28Or will they just have you shooting laser beams?
00:06:31Oh, well, he's a superhero with a sense of humor.
00:06:35So I thought I'd try to remind Hollywood and you, apparently, that I'm still hilarious.
00:06:39Absolutely.
00:06:40Well, you know, this is not our busiest time of the year, darling, as you know.
00:06:43But maybe it will be with you here.
00:06:46I mean, you're welcome to step on that stage anytime, sir.
00:06:49I really appreciate that.
00:06:52The competition looks fierce.
00:06:54I hear she has a line on a fantastic dancing snowman act.
00:06:57Yes, if he can get over his nerves, we might really have something.
00:07:01You're just trying to make a joke about me.
00:07:04I don't think it's funny.
00:07:05Bella, if I was making a joke about you, I definitely would have mentioned your jewelry.
00:07:08How does your neck stay up?
00:07:10Do you have a chiropractor on call?
00:07:11Mikey, Mikey.
00:07:13You're reminding me, giving me flashbacks of that day you left for California.
00:07:18Oh, I was so happy that day.
00:07:21All right, I gotta go.
00:07:22Nice to meet you, Aubrey.
00:07:23It is so nice to see you.
00:07:26What the?
00:07:28Howdy.
00:07:30That was Mike Baxter.
00:07:32Oh, yeah.
00:07:32You missed a lot.
00:07:34How does he know your name?
00:07:36You are getting the deliveries next time.
00:07:38Thank you so much for having us.
00:07:39We've got the DRX sale of the time.
00:07:44All right, I brought you some gum.
00:07:46You're going to save her.
00:07:48Just in time.
00:07:49Oh, they're starting.
00:07:51Good evening.
00:07:52I'm Robert Busby, and we're kicking off Ardenville's Christmas Fest with our hometown funny lady,
00:07:57Bella Del Domino, the star and owner of the legendary comedy club.
00:08:01You know, Christmas is a very special time of the year for us at the comedy club.
00:08:05We are laughing all the way, and we truly believe celebrating can be made so much better with a two-drink minimum.
00:08:12Remember when I used to interview you at our treehouse back when you were going to be the world's biggest movie star?
00:08:17Well, Mom said, acting is a hard-knock life.
00:08:21Everybody wants to be in the movies.
00:08:23Get a real job, kid.
00:08:24So, I did.
00:08:25My real job is a joke writer for a woman who texts with her pointer finger.
00:08:29Don't sell yourself short.
00:08:31You're also a personal assistant.
00:08:33Thanks.
00:08:34So, I couldn't help but notice you've decorated every inch of the club and string lights, while your own home looks like a troll cave.
00:08:42Okay.
00:08:42Well, the comedy club is my home, and, well, being on the road with the kind of D.N. herself.
00:08:47Oh, perfect.
00:08:48Then I can have your apartment.
00:08:51Consider it your Christmas gift to me.
00:08:52Actually, if I remember correctly, my Christmas present was getting you this job, and you should pay attention, because you could learn a lot from Bella.
00:08:59I'm learning a lot more from you.
00:09:02She might be the face, but you're the talent.
00:09:05No, I can't do what Bella does.
00:09:08I'm way too shy for that now.
00:09:10You can handle it.
00:09:11The comedy club has a legacy.
00:09:13Okay, Bella saved it from a bulldozer.
00:09:15Do you know how many legends have performed there?
00:09:17It's launched, I don't know, a thousand careers.
00:09:20And that woman, she did that.
00:09:24And I saw this as an opportunity to dance and sing and say jokes that I'd learned off the TV.
00:09:31What about your career?
00:09:33Haven't you ever considered getting out on that stage?
00:09:35I love writing, I do.
00:09:37And Bella promised to introduce me to some of her literary agent friends, so I will get to a writer's room.
00:09:44There's a ladder to climb.
00:09:46It's been five years.
00:09:48Maybe start looking for an elevator?
00:09:49Tell us, what's your favorite Christmas memory?
00:09:52Well, oddly enough, Robert, it's also the beginning of my comedy career.
00:09:56I still remember to this day, just like it was yesterday, when I got my first laugh, it was my mother.
00:10:03Of course, it would have been a whole lot better if it hadn't been Mom.
00:10:06At least she gave your story a happy ending.
00:10:09I did that.
00:10:09Yeah, one of the perks of being a writer is that you never need therapy if you can just change the ending.
00:10:16Now, we're happy to hear that the Comedy Club is partnering with Oma Wenders to not only sponsor Ardenville's Christmas Fest, but to bring back the variety show.
00:10:24It's been a while since the Comedy Club hosted.
00:10:26Yes, it has.
00:10:28Eight years since you've hosted.
00:10:30She's looking at me.
00:10:31Yes, yes, yes, it has.
00:10:33Who will be performing at the big show?
00:10:37Um, well, Christmas is full of surprises, isn't it?
00:10:42So, I don't want to say too much too soon.
00:10:45Very true.
00:10:46Well, Christmas is still three weeks away, so we're going to be following up with you.
00:10:50But until then, we hope to see you at all the holiday events around town.
00:10:53Oh, I hope so, too.
00:10:54Is that good for you?
00:10:56Okay.
00:10:56You didn't tell her about the variety show?
00:10:58Nope.
00:10:59Okay.
00:10:59And you thought that was a good idea?
00:11:01At the time, yes.
00:11:02Not so much anymore, no.
00:11:03The Comedy Club is sponsoring the Christmas Fest and the Christmas Variety Show.
00:11:14You know why we had to nix that years ago, don't you?
00:11:17Because nobody wants to leave their house on Christmas Eve.
00:11:21And we would have to sell out the entire show just to break even.
00:11:26Yeah, but the show, the show was legendary.
00:11:28It launched so many careers.
00:11:29And all those network execs and studio heads,
00:11:32I mean, they all used to celebrate Christmas at the club.
00:11:34That was back in the day of Covered Wagons,
00:11:36when there were only three TV networks.
00:11:39Well, you finally agreed to sponsor the Christmas Fest.
00:11:41I just, I assume that the variety show was part of it.
00:11:45The city is so excited, Bella.
00:11:47This is a Christmas tragedy.
00:11:50I don't have to go to any of those events just because I'm sponsoring them, do I?
00:11:54Well, you are a beloved local celebrity.
00:11:57I'm sure you're going to have to go to some...
00:11:59Local, Aubrey?
00:12:00I think I have a little more range than local, Aubrey.
00:12:04So, just cancel it.
00:12:06Bella, the comedy club has to show up to some key events.
00:12:09And we also have to donate the proceeds of the variety show to a charity.
00:12:13What charity?
00:12:14Children's Hospital.
00:12:17The one charity I can't back out of.
00:12:20Okay, we can invite industry bigwigs.
00:12:23Maybe even, uh, your agent literary friends.
00:12:27You know, the ones that you promised to introduce me to.
00:12:29It'll be great.
00:12:30The variety show almost destroyed my career and brought the comedy club down.
00:12:35What happened?
00:12:36I remember the first Christmas.
00:12:37I was so excited to be part of it.
00:12:39But I had no idea then how difficult it was to sell out a show on Christmas Eve.
00:12:46Yeah, but we can send out industry invitations today.
00:12:49We can publicize it on our social media.
00:12:51We can tell everybody.
00:12:53And it's going to be great.
00:12:54We can sell out.
00:12:55Industry bigwigs do not laugh.
00:12:59And the few local people who showed up, they couldn't carry this show.
00:13:02There wasn't enough of them.
00:13:04Oh, I totally bombed.
00:13:06I can't tell you how many gigs I missed because of that Christmas variety concert.
00:13:12And I've been trying to crawl my way back ever since.
00:13:16Yeah, you're right.
00:13:19This is on me, and I will fix it.
00:13:21I'll think of something.
00:13:23Good.
00:13:24Good.
00:13:25Chop, chop.
00:13:25Yeah.
00:13:32They published another list of all the young actresses you've dated.
00:13:36Do you know how often I have to convince people that my brother's not a creep?
00:13:38Are the influencers on that list too?
00:13:40It's just the actresses.
00:13:42Look, I've never even met half the women on this list, okay?
00:13:46Except for Margot.
00:13:47I'm kidding.
00:13:48I have moved on from all that, okay?
00:13:52Enough professional face plants and your priorities start to change.
00:13:56Yeah, well, your career will bounce back.
00:13:58Don't be so hurting yourself.
00:13:59Those movies were pretentious, exploitative, never-ending.
00:14:04Oh.
00:14:04But don't get me wrong.
00:14:06You're really great enough.
00:14:06Oh, thank you.
00:14:08That's really sweet of you.
00:14:14And two eggnogs and two cinnamon rolls, please.
00:14:18Thank you so much.
00:14:20I gotta go.
00:14:21Text me when you're done shopping.
00:14:22Good morning.
00:14:35Morning.
00:14:36I saw you while I was in line and thought you might need some eggnog.
00:14:40Don't worry.
00:14:41It's not alcoholic.
00:14:42Although I did see a few people throw caution to the wind at 9 a.m. on a Tuesday.
00:14:45No, thank you.
00:14:46I've already had my cup of heavy cream this morning.
00:14:49Were you always this prickly?
00:14:50Or did Bella drain all the Christmas spirit from you?
00:14:52Okay, now you've put me in a position where I'm some Grinch just because I don't want your eggnog.
00:14:56Has her heart shrunk to both sizes?
00:15:01For Christmas.
00:15:02And so you'll leave me alone.
00:15:07What's in there?
00:15:09Oh, nothing.
00:15:10Just thoughts, ideas, jokes.
00:15:16You're a comic?
00:15:17You seem so well-adjusted.
00:15:19I'm a writer for Bella.
00:15:20And you never wanted to get on stage yourself?
00:15:23Once upon a time.
00:15:24And then what happened?
00:15:25Someone threw a tomato too hard once?
00:15:27My words are much better coming out of Bella's mouth.
00:15:30Well, as someone who has spent years saying someone else's words, I am thrilled to speak for myself again.
00:15:36You don't enjoy movies.
00:15:38Bella would kill for your career.
00:15:40She would commit battery for a callback.
00:15:41The money's okay.
00:15:43But what I'm really in it for is the constant public scrutiny.
00:15:46That's why I love a comedy club.
00:15:47The scrutiny is much more intimate.
00:15:49Yeah.
00:15:50Forgive me if I don't shed a tear for the successful actor up for an action hero film.
00:15:55If you tell me what's in your notebook, I'll try to forgive you.
00:16:01Well, the tree lighting ceremony is tonight.
00:16:05There are Christmas strokes just to kick off the festivities.
00:16:08Oh, great.
00:16:09This is great.
00:16:11Let's hear one.
00:16:13No.
00:16:13Yes.
00:16:14No, you're Mike Baxter.
00:16:16I could never read them to you.
00:16:18Oh, no.
00:16:19No, no, no.
00:16:19Don't think of me as Mike Baxter, the comic.
00:16:22Think of me as the guy who's sitting next to you and desperately loves jokes.
00:16:28Very persuasive.
00:16:30Okay.
00:16:31I have this bit about how my mother is impossible to buy presents for.
00:16:34So this year, I actually asked her to tell me what she wants.
00:16:38And what she wants, I can't seem to find anywhere.
00:16:41And, well, the punchline is at what she wants most is for me to find better health insurance.
00:16:47That's good.
00:16:48Yeah.
00:16:49That's good.
00:16:50What if you somehow got hurt while you're searching for it?
00:16:54Uh, like, sprained my ankle.
00:16:56Yeah.
00:16:57At least you think you did.
00:16:58You're too worried to go to the doctor to find out.
00:17:00Are you sure you want to be an action hero because comedy suits you pretty well?
00:17:05Well, the rooster man is funny.
00:17:07He's funny.
00:17:08See?
00:17:09You've just heard the name.
00:17:10You're already laughing.
00:17:15Oh, it's Bella.
00:17:17I better go.
00:17:18Right now?
00:17:19What is the club on fire?
00:17:20Uh, no.
00:17:21The comedy club's closed.
00:17:22That right there is the star of the town tonight.
00:17:25Oh.
00:17:26This is why I love Christmas.
00:17:27People coming together just to watch a switch get flipped.
00:17:29Yeah.
00:17:30It's beautiful.
00:17:30I'll be there.
00:17:31I'll be there.
00:17:31Front row.
00:17:33Back row?
00:17:34What?
00:17:34Uh, I just, I don't want Bella to get up the stage.
00:17:37I will be incognito.
00:17:39I promise.
00:17:40Like the rooster man.
00:17:41Hmm.
00:17:42I don't actually know what his deal is.
00:17:44Is he the one with the laser things or is he invisible?
00:17:47Well, he's a rooster.
00:17:48So he has razor sharp talons and he can more like glide short distances.
00:17:53Don't forget.
00:17:54He's funny.
00:17:55Well, he is a grown man with talons.
00:17:56Where?
00:17:57So.
00:17:57Oh, you forgot your, uh.
00:17:59Egg milk.
00:18:01I'll see you tonight.
00:18:02Hey, maybe you will, maybe you won't.
00:18:09Good news.
00:18:10We just secured an improv group for the talent show.
00:18:13Amazing.
00:18:14Second city.
00:18:15Cook County Technical Institute.
00:18:17But the good news is they said they'd work for drinks.
00:18:20That puts us at four acts only.
00:18:22We still need a headliner.
00:18:24Bella, right?
00:18:26No, she said she would rather apologize for her second husband
00:18:28than go up during the variety show.
00:18:30What about Mike Baxter?
00:18:31Ian, he's an award nominated actor.
00:18:33I mean, there were Golden Universe awards or whatever,
00:18:36but no, he's not doing her show.
00:18:38Okay, I want you guys to tell me the truth.
00:18:41Is this too Santa, baby?
00:18:44Eartha Kitt wishes.
00:18:46Oh, Aubrey, who's your friend?
00:18:49This is Ian, my cousin.
00:18:50You hired him a month ago.
00:18:52Oh, and I would hire him again in a heartbeat.
00:18:57You look ravishing, as always.
00:18:59But I think that outfit might be a bit too much for tonight.
00:19:02It's pretty cold outside.
00:19:03It's going to be freezing.
00:19:04What are you talking about?
00:19:06The gala is at the police museum.
00:19:08No, no, no.
00:19:09No?
00:19:09You are introing the tree lighting tonight.
00:19:12I sent you the jokes yesterday.
00:19:13I thought that was just banter for the Italian beef hour at the gala.
00:19:18Besides, it's not like I didn't tell you.
00:19:20The Christmas fest is a really big deal, Bella.
00:19:23If you saw the names of the people on that list, Aubrey, you wouldn't be making such a fuss.
00:19:30It's just a lot of people are relying on you to be there.
00:19:32And I'm relying on myself to start networking.
00:19:35I mean, why aren't I in those superhero movies?
00:19:38What do you think?
00:19:39I can't play a chicken or a...
00:19:42Or a sultry supervillain bent on revenge?
00:19:45Aubrey, how much are we paying this delightful young man?
00:19:51Very little.
00:19:52Oh, he's my manager.
00:19:54Okay, fix that tree thing.
00:19:57Remember, I believe in you.
00:19:59And you stay right where you are.
00:20:02Hello.
00:20:03Thanks for encouraging her.
00:20:12It's a bummer nobody to hear your jokes.
00:20:15Oh, well.
00:20:16I'll have plenty more opportunities before Christmas.
00:20:19Why doesn't Belle invite you to her party so you can meet all her agent friends?
00:20:23Oh, she says bringing her assistant to Ezra Plus One will make it seem like she can get a date.
00:20:28I just met her, and she seems incredible.
00:20:30But it seems like she dangles a carrot to keep you behind the scenes.
00:20:34Oh, she supports my career.
00:20:35Because it supports hers.
00:20:37Next year will be different.
00:20:39She knows how much this means to me.
00:20:41And it's not like I don't enjoy my job.
00:20:42You're a talented cousin.
00:20:45I just want to see you hit it big time and not be a ghostwriter forever.
00:20:50What's the deal with Bella?
00:20:52Good to see you.
00:20:52Oh, uh, she said to her apologies, but her dog was sick and then got better and then got adopted, so she had to deal with that.
00:21:01But it all ended up working out.
00:21:03I told Brittany at City Hall this afternoon.
00:21:05Well, she must have forgotten to tell me because in ten minutes I'm emceeing this thing and I haven't even started my vocal warm-ups.
00:21:11I'm sure your elocution will be spot on.
00:21:13I'm sorry.
00:21:14I shouldn't.
00:21:15Well, obviously we need someone to perform, and that's going to be you.
00:21:19Me.
00:21:20No?
00:21:20No, no, no.
00:21:21No, no.
00:21:21No, I'm a nobody.
00:21:22No.
00:21:22Well, that's what I told them, but my hands are tied.
00:21:25No.
00:21:25They're your jokes.
00:21:26Do it for Christmas.
00:21:27No.
00:21:27They won't be the same.
00:21:29I don't have Bella's delivery.
00:21:30I haven't done my vocal warm-ups either, so.
00:21:34You can do it.
00:21:34Yeah.
00:21:35Well, whether you can or can't, it's happening.
00:21:36You're on in two minutes.
00:21:38Two minutes.
00:21:41I think I'm going to throw up.
00:21:43I'll go do sound check.
00:21:45You got this.
00:21:46Yeah.
00:21:47Okay.
00:21:48Yes, I'm going to do it.
00:21:51It's me.
00:21:52It's Mike.
00:21:53Yeah, I know.
00:21:54Mike Baxter.
00:21:58Do I not look incognito?
00:21:59No, you look like Mike Baxter, but in sunglasses.
00:22:03Where's Bella?
00:22:04Isn't she about to go on?
00:22:05I'm killing it.
00:22:06It's the whole thing.
00:22:07What?
00:22:08No.
00:22:08No, no.
00:22:09It's not great.
00:22:10Nobody knows who I am.
00:22:14Now nobody knows who you are.
00:22:16Now I'm just the same nobody, but in sunglasses.
00:22:18Look, you're going to be great.
00:22:21Okay?
00:22:21Just go out there and have some fun with it.
00:22:24They'll know you the next time.
00:22:26Please welcome to the stage.
00:22:28Oh, no.
00:22:28Okay.
00:22:29No, no, no, no.
00:22:30You're not going anywhere.
00:22:31You got this.
00:22:32Okay.
00:22:32But you got it.
00:22:33From our beloved comedy club, Aubrey Wilton.
00:22:40Good luck up here.
00:22:41They wouldn't give me an inch.
00:22:42Okay.
00:22:43That's my time.
00:22:46Hello.
00:22:47Merry Christmas, everybody.
00:22:50Oh, I forgot to move this out of the way.
00:22:55Ardenville.
00:22:55Merry Christmas.
00:22:56Merry Christmas.
00:22:58As Robert said, I do, in fact, work for the historic comedy club.
00:23:01Okay, you all look a little confused.
00:23:03And you know what?
00:23:04I am just as confused as you are.
00:23:05Yeah.
00:23:06The more observant in the audience may have noticed, I am not, in fact, Bella Del Domino.
00:23:10Was it my bouncy, radiant skin that gave it away?
00:23:15What?
00:23:15No?
00:23:17Um, well, can we give it up for the comedy club?
00:23:21Yeah.
00:23:21Yeah, yeah, I've been there for about five years, performing duties as, to quote my business
00:23:27card, Crypt Keeper.
00:23:28Our hallowed halls are lined with photographs of famous, legendary comedians who have graced
00:23:36our stage over the years.
00:23:37They are icons.
00:23:39The real who's who of Hollywood, as in, uh, who's that again?
00:23:46Well, does anybody have someone in their life that is just impossible to buy presents for?
00:23:52Uh, anyone?
00:23:55Uh, my mother, she is one of those people.
00:24:03Uh, I love my mother, but she...
00:24:05Oh, uh, Mike Baxter, what are you doing here?
00:24:14Mike Baxter?
00:24:15Hi there.
00:24:16Well, I was just enjoying your set, and it suddenly occurred to me that I'm pretty sure
00:24:21my picture is hanging on the walls of the comedy club.
00:24:23No, no, no, no.
00:24:23Oh, allow me to clarify.
00:24:25Yes, please, please clarify.
00:24:26Let's let that my earlier joke bore no relevance to the defendant.
00:24:29No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:24:31The defendant is a different word.
00:24:33The all-around innocent...
00:24:34Innocent.
00:24:34That's how we like to...
00:24:35Michael Baxter!
00:24:37Baxter!
00:24:41I'm gonna get off my stage now.
00:24:44And don't forget, tickets are on sale for the variety show Christmas Eve at the comedy club.
00:24:51You really saved me up there.
00:24:56Oh, come on.
00:24:57It's just tough to deal with hecklers, but that was great.
00:24:59That was fun, right?
00:25:00It was fun.
00:25:01It was incredible.
00:25:02I was so scared you were gonna bomb.
00:25:04I almost passed out.
00:25:05Uh, Mike, this is Ian, my very supportive cousin, who always believes in me.
00:25:09I'm such a big fan, especially of your recent work.
00:25:13Oh, that scene where you forgave yourself for not forgiving your son for never forgiving you?
00:25:20I felt that.
00:25:23Well, he's a liar, but I like him.
00:25:26Oma Wenders on the house.
00:25:28Sponsors of the event.
00:25:29And Mr. Baxter, I'm really hoping we see you and Bella at some of our other holiday events.
00:25:34Sure, count me at anything Christmas.
00:25:35This is gonna be the best Christmas fest Ardenville has ever seen.
00:25:40It's time for the tree lighting.
00:25:41Oh, we're missing the switch getting flipped.
00:25:4510, oh, 9, 8, 9, 9, 9, 10, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
00:25:53Oh, my God, what is this?
00:26:07Oma Wenders.
00:26:08It'll get easier than more.
00:26:09Oh, spicy.
00:26:12Oh, it burns.
00:26:13I like it now, though.
00:26:17Just take out those two words there.
00:26:19Oh, I heard you and Mike were quite a hit at the Christmas tree lighting ceremony.
00:26:25You know, it's hard for me to picture you on stage.
00:26:28It's really not in your wheelhouse, is it?
00:26:30We had to promote the variety show.
00:26:33Yeah, the ticket sales haven't been great.
00:26:35Oh, you're lucky to have some star power with you.
00:26:38How did it work?
00:26:40Well, we sold more tickets, and acts are calling us now, which means we can finally hold auditions.
00:26:46I know, I mean, how did it work, your performance?
00:26:48You know, I mean, your writing skills are stellar.
00:26:52But sometimes stage work, it requires a more commanding presence.
00:26:59Well, Mike had enough presence for the both of us.
00:27:02Oh, well, I'm happy that it went well for you.
00:27:04But, you know, it could just be beginner's luck, so you don't want to get too overconfident about it.
00:27:10I mean, you're used to seeing me kill on stage, so you might forget how embarrassing it could be if the whole thing fell flat.
00:27:17Well, you can dazzle audiences in the Christmas Village walkthrough.
00:27:21Where's the drama?
00:27:26It's too pedestrian.
00:27:27No, you're not walking.
00:27:28You're interacting with people as they walk through.
00:27:30And, from what I'm told, you are playing a significant Christmas legend.
00:27:35Oh, that sounds more like it.
00:27:36Bella Del Domino, Christmas legend.
00:27:39There you go.
00:27:40You're going to come with me, right?
00:27:42Because, I mean, in case I need to change the script, I mean, I need you there.
00:27:46Of course, I will be there, as always.
00:27:48But you are a guest on a podcast next week, so let's focus on that next, okay?
00:27:54Christmas, the curse.
00:27:56I'm going to make me enjoy it.
00:27:58Writing away?
00:27:59Yeah.
00:27:59Reminds me of when you were a kid, always lost in your notebook.
00:28:03Except I'm not getting grounded for ignoring my homework.
00:28:06I haven't felt this creative in a really long time.
00:28:09Well, I made you some mint tea for helping me bring the girls to school.
00:28:12Oh, thank you.
00:28:14Wait, school?
00:28:14I could have sworn you said racetrack.
00:28:16I really appreciate you for letting me crash at your place.
00:28:21You know, we love having you.
00:28:22I mean, I wish you could have stayed with us last year, you and Jessica.
00:28:27She's left me for some football player.
00:28:30Then left him when his team lost in the playoffs.
00:28:33I think she has commitment issues.
00:28:34Mm, that's one way to put it.
00:28:36Well, she would have never stayed.
00:28:39That is awful.
00:28:40You said you slept well.
00:28:42I did say that, but I lied.
00:28:44But hanging with family is worth the kink in my neck.
00:28:48And the nagging in my ear.
00:28:50Yeah, well, just think, if you had a family of your own,
00:28:53you'd be able to experience this kind of torture every day.
00:28:55I do want a family someday.
00:28:57It just hasn't been right.
00:28:59I have time.
00:29:00Mm-hmm.
00:29:04Sorry, one second.
00:29:05Mm-hmm.
00:29:07Hey, Damon.
00:29:08Is he on or isn't he?
00:29:10Brandon, is he on?
00:29:11Oh, he's on.
00:29:12Hi, Damon.
00:29:12My key, my favorite client.
00:29:14Sorry about that.
00:29:15I have this new assistant forwarding calls, and it's just been a mess.
00:29:18Well, right, you know, you could try being a little more gentle.
00:29:20What are you, my last assistant?
00:29:22Listen, okay, I'm calling to let you know that things are going well with Rooster, okay?
00:29:26We have an offer?
00:29:27Well, not an offer, per se, but they do want you to come back in and read with the guy who's
00:29:30doing the voice for, what's the name of that talking cow again?
00:29:35Agent Bovine.
00:29:36Yes, that's the one.
00:29:37By the way, they're going crazy for your Christmas set they did with that woman.
00:29:41They were thinking about rewriting the cow and Rooster relationship to have the same
00:29:44banter, you know what I mean?
00:29:46They saw that?
00:29:46Everyone's seen it.
00:29:48How is it possible that my own mother knows more about social media than you do?
00:29:51Your mother doesn't get death threats from teenage comic book fans.
00:29:54Keep up the appearances, okay?
00:29:55And we need more viral moments to keep going so that the student cannot say no.
00:29:59You know, there was a time when an actor could just give a good audition.
00:30:02Well, when you see the actor, tell him I said good moral.
00:30:05Until then, let's keep the viral moments coming, okay?
00:30:08Viral moments.
00:30:09Look amazing up there.
00:30:09Your body's looking better.
00:30:10But you know, Rooster's a superhero.
00:30:13You know what I mean?
00:30:14Goodbye, Damon.
00:30:15No, no, no, listen.
00:30:16I'm just saying the cops at the dinner on Christmas.
00:30:21The studio loved me at the tree lighting.
00:30:25Apparently, I'm one step closer to getting the part.
00:30:29You don't seem excited.
00:30:30No, I am.
00:30:32I am.
00:30:33It's just...
00:30:34Being back made me remember how much I love stand-up.
00:30:39Being on stage.
00:30:40Being in front of an audience.
00:30:42You don't have to be a superhero to be successful.
00:30:45I have to raise my profile.
00:30:47I took a big hit with those indies.
00:30:49Any lower and I'll be going out for the voice of Agent Bovine.
00:30:52Look, things are good.
00:30:54Everything is good.
00:30:59Good.
00:31:10Bella, it's almost showtime.
00:31:12You're going to have to tell them that I've got an emergency with my dog or something.
00:31:17Nope, I've already used that one.
00:31:18You're stuck.
00:31:19Now, please, just come on out already.
00:31:22Look at the sack.
00:31:24When you said a Christmas legend, I imagined somebody much more glamorous, not Santa's stay-at-home hag.
00:31:31Oh, no.
00:31:32No, no.
00:31:33Mrs. Claus is a business owner.
00:31:36I mean, without her, the entire operation just falls apart.
00:31:40I mean, she, she is strong and she is independent.
00:31:47She's probably rich, too, right?
00:31:49Oh, yeah.
00:31:49You sure couldn't tell from the horrible shoes.
00:31:53Where is my husband?
00:31:56Actually, I don't know, but he better show up soon.
00:32:00What is that noise?
00:32:02Those are children, Bella.
00:32:03Uh, Robert is playing Santa and he just texted that he's caught in traffic, so we're going to have to do without him.
00:32:13No, no.
00:32:13Yes, yes.
00:32:14Not alone.
00:32:16You go.
00:32:17Get a costume or change into something less drab.
00:32:20You want me, me?
00:32:21We are going to do this together.
00:32:23Aubrey, don't you think that if Mrs. Claus liked children, she would have had some by now?
00:32:29Uh, excuse me, where did you get that costume?
00:32:39Okay, how excited are we to see Santa?
00:32:43Very excited.
00:32:44Hey, Robert, I'll call you right back.
00:32:48Hi.
00:32:48Mike, what are you doing here?
00:32:50I brought my sister and her girls to see Santa.
00:32:52This is Olivia, this is Gabrielle.
00:32:54Nice to meet you.
00:32:55Nice to meet you, too.
00:32:57How's it going?
00:32:58Good.
00:32:59Uh, well, our Santa's having a bit of a panic attack on the I-94 and the kids are lining up and Bella's the only one there.
00:33:04This is an emergency.
00:33:06Yeah, it's been quite the morning and I don't know what to do.
00:33:08I mean, I can't make the kids wait any longer, so...
00:33:12What?
00:33:13Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
00:33:17Yeah.
00:33:18No, no, no.
00:33:19It'll be great.
00:33:20I don't think so.
00:33:20Mike.
00:33:25Bella, good news, we have a...
00:33:27What is this?
00:33:32Mrs. Claus has turned into a magnificent angel.
00:33:39That's dark, don't you think?
00:33:41Mike?
00:33:42You can't be here, Mike.
00:33:44This is my thing.
00:33:45Uh, we...
00:33:46We have to have Mrs. Claus.
00:33:48I mean, she hands out cookies.
00:33:50The angels, they can't bake.
00:33:52Angel cookies.
00:33:53Angel food cake.
00:33:55Angel cookies.
00:33:56No, no, what?
00:33:57No.
00:33:58Okay, the kids, they're out there and they're expecting Mrs. Claus.
00:34:00And there's feathers everywhere.
00:34:03Bella, this is not going to work and we are late already, so...
00:34:05If you are so concerned about those so-called kids, you wear the sack.
00:34:10Yeah, you put on the sack.
00:34:11And look, I knew this was going to be perfect on...
00:34:14Oh, the gray.
00:34:15It really looks so good on you.
00:34:17Oh, yeah?
00:34:19I mean, doesn't this make a lot more sense?
00:34:23Mm-hmm.
00:34:24Children.
00:34:25Mm-hmm.
00:34:26Oh, well, Merry Christmas, children.
00:34:31Come and say hello to Santa and Mrs. Claus.
00:34:35Ho, ho, ho.
00:34:37Welcome to my village.
00:34:40Oh, welcome to my village.
00:34:43Mrs. Claus has been baking cookies all day for you.
00:34:48All right, all right.
00:34:49It's such a good book.
00:34:51You can just call Miss Bingle Lad.
00:34:53And Santa will hear all your Christmas requests.
00:34:56I forgot to mention, I don't have a lot of experience with kids.
00:34:59Oh, you'll be fine.
00:35:00They love Santa.
00:35:01They love Santa.
00:35:02Okay.
00:35:03Okay, everybody.
00:35:04Take one cookie.
00:35:06Okay, two.
00:35:07Two cookies.
00:35:08Okay.
00:35:09Is there an elf second?
00:35:10Help us.
00:35:11Okay, three.
00:35:12Everyone gets three.
00:35:14No.
00:35:14Is there an elf second?
00:35:16Come here.
00:35:17Take Santa.
00:35:18You've been bummed.
00:35:19You can't bum Santa.
00:35:20Oh, it happens.
00:35:22Even to the best of us.
00:35:24Mike.
00:35:24Audrey.
00:35:25I got some great videos of you today.
00:35:51You should post them.
00:35:52Maybe not the ones of you weeping like a small child.
00:35:55All right, you know what?
00:35:56You just witnessed a man getting trampled by cookie-deprived children,
00:36:00and all you're doing is trying to get views.
00:36:02Hey, you wanted to connect with your audience more.
00:36:04This is the perfect way.
00:36:05A little less terror would have been better.
00:36:07My agent thinks it's helping with the studio.
00:36:09Yeah, I'm sure.
00:36:10You know, I think you should show people the real you.
00:36:12The kids, they loved you.
00:36:13You were a big hit.
00:36:14Yeah, well, Grandpa is pretty bad with social media stuff.
00:36:20Will you help me?
00:36:22Yeah, of course.
00:36:23And afterwards, maybe I can even teach you about internet dialogue.
00:36:25And what about tomorrow night?
00:36:28Caroline's?
00:36:29I hear they have a famous chocolate cake.
00:36:32All right, you know what?
00:36:33If you don't like chocolate cake, I'm going to go hang with the shepherds.
00:36:35So, it's just, we have an event this week, and Bella needs new material, so.
00:36:39Well, if you want, we could work on jokes together.
00:36:42I was planning on dropping in for open mic night, anyway.
00:36:45Yes, Bella would love it if you went up.
00:36:47Yeah.
00:36:47Why don't you come on stage with me?
00:36:49We'll do a set together.
00:36:51Come on, it'll be fun.
00:36:52You could always do your own set.
00:36:54Oh.
00:36:54It'll be fun.
00:36:55No.
00:36:55All right, all right, I tried.
00:36:57I got to get back to my sister.
00:36:58I'll see you tomorrow night, 8 o'clock.
00:37:00Bye.
00:37:00Bye.
00:37:00Bye.
00:37:01Bye.
00:37:02Bye.
00:37:03Bye.
00:37:04Bye.
00:37:05Bye.
00:37:10Wow.
00:37:11It was the hot date.
00:37:13Uh, not a date.
00:37:15Okay, work meeting.
00:37:16I'm helping Mike with social media, and he's helping me with jokes.
00:37:19He's a very lucky work colleague.
00:37:21He doesn't see me like that.
00:37:22Stars date other stars.
00:37:25Yeah, well, last time I checked, you're the funniest person I know.
00:37:27And then wish me luck with work.
00:37:30With work.
00:37:31Good luck.
00:37:34Bye.
00:37:35Bye.
00:37:35Bye.
00:37:36Bye.
00:37:43Bye.
00:37:43Hi.
00:37:43Hi.
00:37:43Excuse me.
00:37:46Is that a little bit more private?
00:37:47Thanks.
00:37:48Thanks.
00:37:49Bye.
00:37:49Hi.
00:37:50Bye.
00:37:50Bye.
00:37:51Bye.
00:37:51Bye.
00:37:52Bye.
00:37:52Bye.
00:37:53Bye.
00:37:53Bye.
00:37:54thank you thank you thank you thank you if my agent asks I ordered cottage cheese rooster
00:38:04they want this version of me that doesn't exist apparently superheroes he like monks
00:38:09what do you want I want to enjoy my life to make people happy I got Saturday sketch club at 19 and
00:38:17for the first time I was successful but it felt like I needed to prove myself as a real actor
00:38:23so I started doing these dramas which all flopped and then it felt like I needed to be on top to be
00:38:29happy okay so the dramas flopped but why not go back to comedy I love comedy but I wanted to feel
00:38:37in control of my life again you know failed relationships and box office disasters so
00:38:42I took myself out of the comedy game entirely put myself in early retirement got myself a landline
00:38:47and a walker and a whole bunch of hard candy okay well to me it seems like you were afraid to fail
00:38:54at something that was really important to you all right now all that's important to me is carb loading
00:38:57before I need a six-pack okay you don't have to do that no I do it's it's in my contract it's a
00:39:03contractual six-pack it's okay to be yourself you know you don't have to prove anything to me
00:39:09sometimes it feels like I need to prove to everyone that I'm still that 19 year old success
00:39:18story is that why you're taking rooster because it seems to me like you don't really want it I do
00:39:24it's the only way to come back on top I just want to make people smile again well for what it's worth
00:39:30you make me smile without being star of screen and stage Mike Baxter you're different
00:39:36I am talking so much way too much what about you what about your stage debut I mean you've got
00:39:46that star quality nobody can take their eyes off of you
00:39:49is is is what everyone believes not not just me that's all I'm saying
00:39:58it's better for me off stage trust me who told you that everyone uh Bella my mom eighth grade
00:40:07drama teacher no to not even try you're clearly as talented as you are it's absolutely crazy to
00:40:12me you owe it to yourself to try I have goals I do my goal is to get in the writer's room you know
00:40:18write for stars like you stars like me look don't waste your talent behind a desk you should make
00:40:24this Christmas means something it's the best time to follow your heart you might be surprised
00:40:29where it leads you Christmas has this way of giving us exactly what we need
00:40:34hello darling thank you so much for fitting my little show into your schedule
00:40:45well if having over a million subscribers to a podcast is little then my fan base is like a
00:40:53a flea circus you must be so excited with the comedy club going viral oh yes well Mike Baxter is
00:41:00performing oh it always makes us so happy when our stars come back home to their roots absolutely
00:41:06him and this uh new comic are certainly causing a sensation oh and promoting the comedy club
00:41:12new comic yes yes yes please tell me all about her I mean breaking new talent is part of the comedy
00:41:19club's lacy uh-huh huh oh that's my assistant she has to get me coffee when I ask her well that is so
00:41:33sweet of you to give her a platform at Christmas she is clearly a rising talent may not be your assistant
00:41:40so long
00:41:47Aubrey say something in the mic quick oh hey how was the podcast well good insightful I had no idea
00:41:56that the club was causing such a buzz on the internet yeah having Mike around helps a lot yeah of course it
00:42:02does he's a big star so Aubrey how are tickets going for the variety show um okay I think as soon as I
00:42:09secure a headliner then uh things should really pick up yeah it's tough I know I'll tell you
00:42:15I won't perform but I will host sure yeah I think everybody will love that I know they will
00:42:25well duty calls if the Christmas fest needs me I'll be there uh does this mean you'll be attending other
00:42:31events what's next twinkle tunnel ah is there an audience
00:42:37no it's a tunnel but there will be at the snowball social which is right afterwards okay you can
00:42:41count on me I'll be there with a costume on now Aubrey I don't want you filling in for me any longer
00:42:47darling I can tell by the state of your under eyes that you are working way way way too hard
00:42:55now and I'll need new material for tonight that is what I pay you for isn't it not to be prancing
00:43:02around on stage flirting with Mike Baxter uh yes I will send you some new stuff this afternoon
00:43:09excellent see that you do
00:43:15well that was a sudden change of heart no I've seen this before when her last husband remarried she
00:43:20made me send all these fake rumors to tabloids and stuff she must think Mike's performing at the
00:43:25variety show oh it's too late now well you've got some auditions to watch so I'm gonna think about
00:43:32what to do with that later I really think you should try and beatbox I think you could do it
00:43:36oh absolutely yeah you could guys sorry I'm late this is my sister Steph Steph this is Aubrey this is
00:43:43Mike said you wouldn't mind if I watch I told her we were judging people and she forced me to bring her
00:43:48not at all please take a seat
00:43:53oh wow I like his sweater he's got a nice outfit thank you Aubrey I uh I love you
00:44:02I really really love you I really appreciate you
00:44:11can I start again sure you can try again yeah one more try
00:44:14uh keep keep taking lessons this is theater my name meaningless
00:44:27oh uh thank thank you I'm a poet the club chicken club turkey club comedy club
00:44:36one two three Christmas tree Aubrey you and me
00:44:42oh
00:44:48let's go thank you thank you thank you
00:44:51okay I got one more
00:44:54can you tell lupus a sick
00:44:57lupus a method actor
00:44:58oh no it's gonna be okay
00:45:00yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I love the juggler always the juggler might have been my favorite
00:45:12thank you guys for letting me put my judgmental skills in good use
00:45:16let me know if you want tickets oh I would but my husband gets home on Christmas Eve and
00:45:20we have this tradition of dinner and movies by which I mean take out and fighting over what movie to watch
00:45:27I guess most people are staying home on Christmas Eve instead of buying tickets so you'll get your audience
00:45:32yeah hopefully we will with these new acts anyway we should get back it's open mic night
00:45:38good I'll see you tonight really yeah but keep it a secret I want an unsuspecting audience
00:45:45see you tonight
00:45:56Christmas dads hold court we're the ones who have a direct line to Santa like kids must laugh at our
00:46:02jokes right who's never hungry at Christmas
00:46:06I don't know turkey because he's always stuffed oh come on remember who's got the line to Santa and
00:46:14please please be nice folks all right by the way my name is oh open mic is dying is easy comedy
00:46:23is hard that's why I always stay behind the scenes okay let's all give it up for Jeremy
00:46:32good for you Jeremy okay settle back have a drink our next comic will be coming up any minute
00:46:44hey how's the audience tonight oh somewhere between despacho and room temp right where I like them
00:46:51you're not nervous I mean this is your first stand-up in years I'm excited
00:46:56I just hope they remember who I am or at least forget my last movie they'll love you
00:47:00thank you why don't you go up there and shine superstar all right pretend to laugh no matter what
00:47:11testing
00:47:20keep it going keep it going so Christmas people talk about the parties the presents the food
00:47:26but nobody talks about the weird Christmas liqueurs
00:47:32don't make me freak your weird Christmas liqueurs
00:47:37it's like they mix vegetables with some menthol
00:47:41it tastes a lot like Pepto-Bismol weird Christmas liqueurs
00:47:49cherry eggnog pumpkin spice before you drink it I would think twice don't give me a peppermint
00:47:59matcha schnapps I'll drink the whole shot and it gave me the crops
00:48:04we'll kiss Christmas the cures next year I'll say no thank you
00:48:17ladies and gentlemen I've got a big problem here
00:48:23it's a problem that has plagued humanity for a very long time
00:48:26oh should I buy a fake tree or the real thing a pine tree has a lot of needles too clean I'm not
00:48:36saying that a real tree ain't jingling but do I wanna do the extra work and everything I only have a
00:48:43six-foot ceiling my vacuum will start squealing I'm not saying that a real tree ain't healing but
00:48:50suddenly a fake one sounds appealing I don't wanna be a grinch to anyone but I bet even Santa has a
00:48:59fake one I'm not saying I'm not a real tree ain't fun but this year I'm going with a fake don't judge son
00:49:07all right I'm getting a fake tree this year so thank you for having me with that
00:49:11well wasn't that a triumphant return to our stage Mr. Mike Baxter what's new hey I just
00:49:24got off stage oh man it felt so good to be back excellent I'm actually on my way to a Christmas
00:49:29party tonight but I wanted to tell you the widgets sent me on catching fire oh that's great but this
00:49:35this felt right you know I think we should start a tour maybe a a special sure after you land rooster
00:49:43then you have carte blanche in Hollywood well right but I may not get it well what buddy told me that
00:49:49Harlow studio execs love that you're mainly with the people doing your Christmas thing I think you got
00:49:54this in the back so let's land this movie and then talk about stand-up do you think this is the right fit
00:49:59for me what if rooster man is just another bad move you know I can't afford another swing in
00:50:05this like that stop stop you're being paranoid okay you're bigger than stand-up this is our way
00:50:10back to the top don't blow it I just want to connect to people again in a real way and you will
00:50:16in IMAX listen I gotta go okay if I'm really happy I had a good time tonight I will keep you posted with
00:50:22everything you do with the studio you are so close it's so close Mike okay I gotta go talk soon talk soon
00:50:35you know one time I bombed so badly the next guy up passed around a hat to start my relocation fund
00:50:46I made more money that night than I did the whole month
00:50:50I got laughs with the same jokes at a club last night
00:50:54look there's no substitution for stage time and just keep having fun you know regardless of how they're
00:51:01reacting and they're gonna want to join in that's great advice thanks I appreciate it you're a legend
00:51:09Mike Baxter oh stop it hey chin up it only gets harder yeah look at you you were great today you
00:51:20killed it thank you thank you I felt great the happiest I've felt in a long time
00:51:26you know some people even like to smile when they're happy okay my agent thinks I need to focus
00:51:34on acting not stand up maybe you should just focus on what makes you happy oh he said if I get the part
00:51:41I'll have carte blanche I was too embarrassed to tell him I don't actually speak French yeah I'm sure
00:51:47you will right after the sequel the crossover and the reboot where you pass the torch on to a much
00:51:52younger much more bankable booster much younger better you know this Christmas I feel more alive
00:52:01than I have for the last five years why is that well a wise man once told me that Christmas gives you
00:52:11exactly what you need so pay attention what if I fall on my face what if I fail well the comedy club is
00:52:21actually hiring a janitor we don't offer benefits but you can get any show for free that thing is so
00:52:27easy with you well I'm happy to help now chin up because it only gets harder chin up that was my line
00:52:38yeah with Jeremy you just stole my line yeah that's the whole point you just said that
00:52:52hey got you an omelet awesome I haven't had a chance to eat breakfast yet how much
00:52:57it's on me yeah and I signed your paychecks I know how much you make it's fine
00:53:02tickets are at a standstill for the show even after Mike's performance last night
00:53:05I know but we don't have an act big enough to entice people to leave their homes on Christmas
00:53:09Eve honestly everyone wants to know if Mike will be there I do too
00:53:15Bell is coming just don't mention anything hi how about last night we got more hearts on our post
00:53:22than ever that's amazing I was thinking we should give some hot chocolate to the people in the standby
00:53:29line up when we sell out of what for eight ten bucks a cup we will have to get them to line up in
00:53:36the back out in the alley because the front is going to be vip only vip casting agents and network
00:53:44execs and directors oh they're starting to swarm like sharks and i bella am finally the chump
00:53:53that's amazing look this variety show is so important we've got to impress these people or else
00:54:03we don't want that so tell me you have this Aubrey yes i will take care of it
00:54:12it's new york this variety show it could really change my our career
00:54:18yeah i'll see you both later not if i see you first
00:54:26he slays me oh
00:54:31what am i gonna do you know what to do give the people what they want
00:54:35i can't no mike has enough on his plate just ask him he's into you you think he's into me
00:54:42no no every celebrity wants to spend their vacation handing out cookies in a costume
00:54:49don't tell me you're not into him okay maybe i'm just a little into him i love you cuz but waiting
00:54:57for what you want to find you is a waste you need to stop hiding behind bella take charge
00:55:05could change your life and sell tickets okay i will go for him yes professionally
00:55:14sure oh uh i put the drinks and the omelet on the company card i hope that's okay yes
00:55:19seeing aubrey what makes you say that since when you wear cologne i always wear cologne too much
00:55:41i have seen you take a nap backstage 20 minutes before a sketch with obama
00:55:44how are you nervous now she's great i mean we have so much fun together she sees things in me
00:55:55i didn't know anyone else good good show her who you really are not some shameless non-committal
00:56:03bachelor those gossip blogs make you out to be it's their words not mine
00:56:07i appreciate you steph you know that i know you do now don't screw this up right bring her something
00:56:16nice okay i'm nice not expensive
00:56:26all right
00:56:32hey hey sorry i'm late i was walking over and saw this in a window
00:56:39beautiful to remind you of how you killed it at the tree lighting it's a well-made item and it
00:56:44reminded me i love it shut up shall we yeah come on i was a microphone by the way
00:56:53it's because you're an amazing singer wow it's beautiful it's a nice change of pace from a comedy
00:57:01club yeah i'm really glad you came and not just tonight but to the comedy club
00:57:08you've made this christmas pretty fun okay okay maybe i should get you an ornament so you won't forget
00:57:14it oh i wonder where i can get one with a mob of children bringing a grown man to tears don't worry
00:57:20it's gonna haunt my dreams it's fine too for a very long time and besides who says i want to go
00:57:26back what are you gonna do here as long as that was around i cannot promise your safety oh that's a
00:57:30very good point i could open up a b b b for the iron bars i will install on all the windows of course
00:57:38but yeah it sounds perfect for when you retire let's not forget you have a movie korea
00:57:43it's been really awesome being on stage again you know near people that are important to me well
00:57:53then that's where you belong
00:57:57you make a lot of people really mad i think it would make a lot more people happy are you one of
00:58:04those people i just want what's best for you most people want something from me not you can i be
00:58:15honest yeah yeah of course okay i'm just gonna get it out um the social media storm is attracting a
00:58:23lot of attention a ton of industry people are coming to the variety show yeah yeah no it's it's
00:58:28great i think my my agent's flying in to some extent yeah but we have a ton of industry people
00:58:33and no locals to laugh clap or just enjoy the fun and well if i have a half empty room then
00:58:38bella's career is finished and then mine just goes down the drain with her seats tickets aren't
00:58:43selling and we really need a headliner and a lot of people are asking about you and would you just
00:58:49please make my yes yes of course really yes would be my pleasure so can bella announce it at this
00:58:57snowball social tonight i have your word because if the audience start writing then i'm actually
00:59:02bella's designated human shield let's go sell some tickets okay i yeah come on let's do it to the
00:59:08snowball social
00:59:11hi there nutcracker you look beautiful thank you and a reward for the coffee she comes with
00:59:29rocks what is this walnut for you what for me oh my thank you so much for this do you want me to eat
00:59:35this right now you do i just crack them well actually turns out walnuts are really tough to
00:59:40crack right that makes sense and who are you supposed to be jack frost baby handsome like not as
00:59:49functional as a nutcracker but very handsome thank you aubrey oh uh looks like i gotta your elf needs
01:00:03well i thought you were supposed to wear a costume aha what do you say he said yes he's gonna headlines
01:00:12huh what if he said no i put it on the company card oh i should probably find bella so she can
01:00:25announce oh she actually texted me saying she's running late she also asked me to save her a slow
01:00:30dance i think i learned my lesson about encouraging older women why is mike baxter in a costume is it true
01:00:36is mike baxter headlining the variety show that's okay okay i was about to give away free tickets
01:00:41the assisted living facility we'll announce it right before the couple's snowball spotlight dance
01:00:46thank you well i should probably help ian yeah yeah because a simple addition does hurt my brain
01:00:53i think i'll be okay going fine want to dance
01:00:58i think we might sell out tonight thanks to you what are you talking about thanks to you give
01:01:13yourself some credit you've been working hard the comedy club belongs to bella without her i wouldn't
01:01:19even have the chance to write not true you write because that's who you are but to be honest from what
01:01:25i've seen you are so much more i think when bella eventually introduces me to her industry friends
01:01:36then i can finally make that leap okay i had a mentor once who told me that it's a very dangerous thing
01:01:45to put your entire destiny in someone else's hands you don't need bella's help you didn't have any help
01:01:55you said the variety show gave you your first big breakup talent scout saw you oh he did but he was
01:02:00only there because i sent him the tickets he emailed to make sure that he got the tickets and called
01:02:05repeatedly to make sure that he got the email to make sure that he got the tickets and i did the same
01:02:08thing for about 15 others one showed up really yes look at you still obnoxious about to be a superhero
01:02:17well i mean the jury is still out on that i won't know until after christmas and what are you doing
01:02:23for christmas well after the show probably have a very exciting night watering my plants sorting my mail
01:02:30very exciting unless you'd want to spend christmas together but it'll be your fault if my plants die
01:02:37ladies and gentlemen our couple spotlight snowball dance is about to start but before the romance
01:02:43gets started our costume friends from the comedy club have a huge announcement about the closing of
01:02:48christmas fest so i know a lot of you know that we've had a special guest here over the holidays but
01:02:53you know what let me get the team up from the comedy club to tell us more uh is bella here no but
01:02:58aubry's here aubry wilson come on down hello as i'm sure some of you have noticed we added a new
01:03:12headliner to our variety show so i am pleased to announce that mike baxter will be performing
01:03:20thank you so much aubry aubry my assistant everybody thank you darling thank you okay please help me
01:03:33bring to the stage the comedy club superstar comic and our christmas headliner mike baxter
01:03:40mike we are so thrilled to have you performing and of course i'll be hosting the dynamic duo right
01:03:55folks okay now don't forget pick your tickets up tonight because we are selling out so fast
01:04:03the hottest show in town is only three days away please make sure you get your tickets from the
01:04:07table in the back and why don't we get mr and mrs jack frost to kick off this snowball spotlight dance
01:04:12that's the ice queen to you darling but i will accept the spotlight mike
01:04:21noah
01:04:21i'm so glad you're home thanks appreciate that and spin spin right now
01:04:41i'm not keeping you am i
01:04:45want some good news sure tickets are sold out vip section's full it's going to be a packed house on
01:04:51christmas eve you did it we did it you should get a fantastic show tomorrow we celebrate oh no i don't
01:05:00know i have to write christmas eve is three days away and bella's going to do jokes what about mike
01:05:08you know i am going to need an opening iron jack frost and ice cream are a better fit for the nutcracker
01:05:13thank you
01:05:28thank you
01:05:33hello mike you're not still out in uh what was it dakota are you uh outside chicago our third largest city
01:05:40right well listen i was watching the summer this morning i couldn't help but notice that you were
01:05:45outside crowing
01:05:48what crowing
01:05:51sunrise it's what roosters do yes thank you damon i know what's happening did i get the parts yes you
01:05:57got it what i'm trying to say is you are officially the rooster well actually i'm rooster ma'am
01:06:03exactly listen they called this morning i'm working on a deal right now but you are a man of the
01:06:07people you feel the deal congrats
01:06:14congrats
01:06:16mikey didn't you hear me did my assistant drop the call because if he did i swear you can break
01:06:21no no i'm here hey can i call you back i have to finish writing my act for the variety show
01:06:27you're not still performing or you know we need you back in la asap they need to scan your feet for
01:06:32the prosthetics i can't i'm headlining no mike you understand you have to be back in l.a they're
01:06:37doing a whole song and dance one of those conventions you know the ones where the keys get together and
01:06:40watch trailers i i just um i i need a bit of time to to think about this no there's no time my assistant
01:06:50booked you a flight christmas eve he'll send you the details i'm committed to the club mike they will
01:06:55understand this is a franchise mike you've been talking about action figures and bet sheets a whole
01:07:00lot of people are counting on you with this maybe this isn't the right move for me oh yes it is listen
01:07:07i will personally bring you the contract myself i'm on my way brandon are you there listen brandon
01:07:13put me a flight out to um where is this place no damon you you really don't need to come here
01:07:19mikey listen to me two words okay whole grains i'll see you soon damon
01:07:33it's gonna be a big night at the very least an expensive one bella asked for last minute
01:07:38decorations but but she did give me my christmas bonus so it's a wash she gave me one too now i
01:07:44remember why i started encouraging older women in the first place this is good stuff can't all be
01:07:50for bella it's my idea book i write anything and everything in it and you should perform it you
01:07:57have enough material there well i'm a writer besides anytime i was good it's because mike was up there
01:08:02with me hi hi i'm damon cardona i represent mike baxter are you the cleaning staff among other things
01:08:09you're early for the show no i'm not here for the show i'm just here to pick up mike is he around
01:08:13uh picking up yeah i'd love to go to the o'hare before the diamond launch fills up i'm sorry um
01:08:20i haven't talked to mike in the last day he's leaving oh you guys must not read up on the trades
01:08:26okay listen mike booked booster man so he has to go back to la for press you know i gotta think because
01:08:33those viral videos helped us cross the finish line they were amazing hi damon ah i told you
01:08:39i would be here listen i could not let you miss this opportunity so i have a car in the back if
01:08:43you hurry up you get that champagne service damon i'm gonna meet you outside okay right
01:08:49well good meeting you later christmas and uh don't take too long i uh think i left my oven on i'm gonna
01:09:03you got the part i wanted to tell you but i wasn't sure about taking it okay
01:09:07i needed some time to think did you you could have told me before damon did i needed to figure
01:09:12out what i was gonna do first and what you figured out was leaving me here without a headliner just
01:09:17backing out at the last minute it's complicated and that's why i came over here to tell you in person
01:09:22i didn't think damon was gonna find you first this has been in the works for such a long time i don't
01:09:28have a choice you do and you made it you don't understand people rely on me doing this movie
01:09:33the studio can crush you well somebody told me that it is a dangerous thing to leave your destiny
01:09:39in other people's hands
01:09:44sorry trust me it wasn't an easy decision
01:09:47listen to me you don't need me for the show okay you've got the talent the tickets are sold
01:09:58it's gonna be a success no matter what
01:10:00yeah it will be a success thank you aubrey this is your time
01:10:07and it's your time to be here on the big screen congratulations aubrey
01:10:11you're a star you shine on your own
01:10:17may your christmas mike
01:10:29we don't have a headliner now none of the acts want to replace mike he set the expectations too high
01:10:35yeah you set your expectations too high when you put your faith in that that sellout and how
01:10:41much is she making for that movie four or five mil okay i have a great set maybe you can close yeah
01:10:48or maybe you can get that magician you hired just saw me in half oh the crowd wants to see the
01:10:56headliner they're not going to be happy until they do and a non-happy crowd they don't laugh
01:11:02what are the vips gonna think oh i cannot believe this is happening to me again bella they're your
01:11:08friends friends don't forget about you friends don't ignore your calls friends broker your million
01:11:14dollar deals not advertisements for battery acid thinly disguised as soda pop looks like we're
01:11:21gonna crash and burn together you don't deserve that aubrey
01:11:26i'll do it what crash and burn i just said we'll do it together headline the people in town
01:11:34they've seen me perform i have a ton of followers and i got us in this situation and i'm gonna get
01:11:40us out of it honey they're not going to be a very forgiving crowd i am not going to let them break me
01:11:45okay i will do it okay i'm just going to tell you as much as i want to see you succeed out there
01:11:52just as much as i don't want you to because i don't want to lose you impossible as if you could
01:11:59ever lose me i'm only here because of you and you'll always be home to me mila
01:12:07aubrey aubrey you belong on center stage i want you to go out there and claim it
01:12:14five minutes to show time there she is the star that saved christmas and you you're the little dipper
01:12:30does that mean i i uh i think i may have just blacked out oh okay uh
01:12:38can you stop celebrating so loudly the girls are trying to take a nap
01:12:50i thought a comeback would make me happy for christmas eve having to leave you and the girls
01:12:55and look you know me i wouldn't do this if i didn't have a choice but you do
01:13:07well you always have a choice i'm proud of you no matter what you do i just want you to be happy
01:13:15oh forgive me for saying this but i do not like that man man that makes two of us
01:13:19i'm so proud of you oh i love you i love you go follow your heart
01:13:30or whatever you have to do to make that man leave
01:13:39so they've already sent some of the pr briefs so if anyone asks you're at the comics your whole
01:13:44life and you can sleep in a chicken coop okay damon when do i get to be myself this is yourself
01:13:54only a richer and horrible
01:13:59what is that aren't are those
01:14:04let me see hey it's it's not a mikey i said whole grain i wasn't gonna eat the whole thing
01:14:11here have some walnuts
01:14:21okay you know what you don't want the walnuts don't like them how about this we can get you
01:14:25something else at the airport okay i don't need to come back on top i don't
01:14:31i want to make people happy again in my own way take these you have these abs on you and post you
01:14:38can eat whatever you want damon i gotta follow my heart listen to me we're gonna make this living
01:14:43very happy and lucrative one okay trust me stop the car please no no don't stop the car please
01:14:50don't do this it's christmas we're talking action figures mikey stop the car
01:14:57just drive action figures mikey stop the car damon
01:15:02eat a pastry don't do this trust me
01:15:13i have been naughty all year just to save poor santa the tree
01:15:18like but really it's a wonderful life isn't it folks and and we've been blessed this year
01:15:24with a white christmas and we're not home alone we're all here together with a great christmas warm
01:15:30spirit ready to enjoy the first christmas variety concert that the comedy club has put on
01:15:37in years yes yes okay you got this cuz yeah they're either gonna love me or they're gonna hate me oh
01:15:48they're gonna hate me they're gonna love you this is your destiny i know back then in the treehouse
01:15:54and i know it now so get out there and make them laugh on christmas get ready for a big christmas
01:16:00surprise now please put your hands together and help me welcome to the stage our very own funny lady
01:16:08the real queen are you ready to drop the curtain if i faint please aubry wilson aubry get up here
01:16:22we are going to have so much fun get up here and slay them
01:16:27this is the nicest she has ever been to me i don't know what was in that eggnog
01:16:36hello hello wow let's give it up for bella del domino yes thank you full house tonight wow uh yeah
01:16:45it's here i know right yeah i can already sense the the stress levels rising yeah the the most wonderful
01:16:54time of the year you know when all your loved ones are so close together under one roof yeah it's great
01:17:02i love christmas it is my favorite holiday and of course i love my mother okay yes she makes my life
01:17:08a little difficult at times there's one thing about her that just really grinds my gears and that is that
01:17:14this angel woman is just impossible to buy presents for so this year i just gave up i said mother please just
01:17:21tell me what you want for christmas and i will just buy it for you she finally told me but you know
01:17:26i can't for the life of me find it anywhere so if any of you know where i can find better health
01:17:32insurance please see me after the show
01:17:39yeah i mean have you ever looked at your insurance policy i mean those things they are longer than a
01:17:44christmas carol you are in trouble i mean it's madness it's like trying to
01:17:48decipher an ancient scroll anyways i didn't give up because i am a very good daughter
01:17:55so i just kept looking here there and i looked so hard that i actually
01:17:59ended up spraining my ankle looking for it or at least i think i did i was too afraid to go to the
01:18:06hospital to find out mike baxter
01:18:23too hard to uh
01:18:34mike baxter
01:18:39you came back why
01:18:40i realized the only comeback i care about is to the one person that matters to me
01:18:52i also had some last minute shopping to do ah there it is yes your typical male to-do list
01:19:07finished tasks that should have been done weeks ago and interrupt woman getting more attention than you
01:19:13i have a great job
01:19:17thank you so much for what i need
01:19:18here
01:19:27Encore! Encore! Encore! Encore!
01:19:30Hey, I want you to come on up and join me here on stage.
01:19:34You want me to come on stage right now?
01:19:35Yes, I want to join you.
01:19:48I've got some notes.
01:19:49Yeah. Did you learn anything?
01:19:53What do I want most for Christmas?
01:19:55An apology?
01:19:57I made a huge mistake.
01:20:00I'm sorry.
01:20:04Yeah, well, you're a big action superhero now,
01:20:06so I'm sure after your first check,
01:20:08you'll just forget all about me.
01:20:10I passed.
01:20:11I want to be here, laughing with you.
01:20:16If you'll have me.
01:20:24Mike Baxter, everyone.
01:20:27So, for some of you that may not know, he was supposed to play a chicken earlier.
01:20:36Rooster, rooster.
01:20:38Sorry.
01:20:39Just politically correct for roosters, everyone.
01:20:41Rooster.
01:20:42Ladies and gentlemen, round of applause for the incredible, Aubrey Wilson.
01:20:47Give it up!
01:20:59Congratulations on a spectacular variety show.
01:21:02Oh, thank you, Robert.
01:21:03Any chance you're free to join me for Christmas dinner?
01:21:06Oh, Robert.
01:21:08Oh, darling, we were never going to work out anyway.
01:21:12You don't have children, do you, Robert?
01:21:15Hey, execs, we love you, Mikey.
01:21:18They're like the wise men, but they're often one hour specials instead of sheep or whatever.
01:21:22You did so good.
01:21:23Come here, man.
01:21:24Oh, okay.
01:21:25Well, you look fantastic.
01:21:28David, David, Merry Christmas.
01:21:31Are you sure about rooster men?
01:21:34Because I...
01:21:35Hey, we can word something out.
01:21:37Right between the two or two, practically, it's shooting in CGI.
01:21:40So, if you're on stage...
01:21:41David, I'd like to introduce you to Aubrey Wilson.
01:21:43I think she'd make a great client for the agency.
01:21:45Hi, nice to meet you.
01:21:50You know, I love to talk.
01:21:54And you can have the pick of any agent you want, especially with his endorsement.
01:21:59Thank you, I will call you.
01:22:01Of course, looking forward to it.
01:22:05You were a wonderful darling.
01:22:08She was going to break my heart to lose you.
01:22:10Oh, unless you decide to stay, in which case, I'll just have to fire you.
01:22:17I think if I'm going on tour, I'm going to need an opening act.
01:22:21I don't know about an opening act, Mike Baxter.
01:22:24I might consider co-headlining with you or...
01:22:28Certainly.
01:22:29I'm sorry.
01:22:31Oh, my goodness.
01:22:33Well, I'm going to leave you two to discuss.
01:22:35And remember, you always have a home here at the Comedy Club.
01:22:39The both of you.
01:22:41Thanks, Bella.
01:22:42What a tiny couple.
01:22:45Oh, Bella.
01:22:50Were you serious about going on tour?
01:22:52Definitely.
01:22:54You'll steal the show, but...
01:22:56But keeps me from losing you again.
01:22:59Worth the trade-off.
01:23:00Yeah, well, I'm not like those Hollywood girls.
01:23:02I know.
01:23:05You're much funnier.
01:23:07And you're also perfect.
01:23:10This is the best Christmas ever.
01:23:13So does this mean you'll wait for Santa with me?
01:23:16Tonight, you never answered me at the social.
01:23:19Absolutely.
01:23:21Merry Christmas, Mike Baxter.
01:23:23Merry Christmas, Monbury Wilson.
01:23:24All right, so I've got one more for you.
01:23:50And this is a love song.
01:23:52I really, really like you.
01:24:02I'm down straight for a kiss.
01:24:04I asked you out at a holiday party, though some food was a meal.
01:24:10You gave a look in over your shoulder, telling me it's time to go.
01:24:15But I looked up high, and I saw her under mistletoe.
01:24:20Yes!
01:24:21Kiss me.
01:24:23I didn't make up the rules.
01:24:26Don't you dare diss me.
01:24:29That'd make me feel like such a fool.
01:24:32I'm leaning in toward your face now.
01:24:35It's something that I want to achieve.
01:24:37And if you will allow it, we can kiss till New Year's Eve.
01:25:07We'll see you later.
01:25:24We'll see you later.
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