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  • 17 minutes ago
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00:00In a few moments, I will grant a full, absolute, and unconditional presidential pardon
00:05to two handsome Thanksgiving turkeys, and this is their lucky day. This is a lucky day for them.
00:12Terrible situation caused by a man named Sleepy Joe Biden. He used an auto pen last year for the
00:18turkey's pardon. So I have the official duty to determine, and I have determined, that last year's
00:25turkey pardons are totally invalid, as are the pardons of about every other person that was
00:33pardoned other than, where's Hunter? No, Hunter's was good. That was the one pardon, Pam, that was good,
00:40right? The rest of them are all invalid. I don't know what the hell you're going to do about that,
00:44but that's, now we're going to take a little of the joking. That is a mess. But they're hereby null and
00:50void. The turkeys known as Peach and Blossom last year have been located, and they were on their way
00:57to be processed. In other words, to be killed. But I have stopped that journey, and I am officially
01:04pardoning them, and they will not be served for Thanksgiving dinner. We saved them in the nick of
01:11time. This one has plenty of time, but they were saved in the nick of time.
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