- il y a 20 heures
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997) is a colorful and comedic adventure that follows a lively secret agent as he adjusts to a new era while taking on a clever foe. Filled with playful humor, stylish visuals, and memorable characters, the film delivers fun moments and a lighthearted tone. With its upbeat energy and creative storytelling, it remains an entertaining and enjoyable experience for fans of classic comedy.
Austin Powers International Man of Mystery, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery 1997, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery movie, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery film, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery full movie, comedy adventure, fun comedy, classic 1997 movie, playful humor, secret agent story, lively comedy, character driven film, entertaining movie, memorable characters, humorous adventure, lighthearted story, stylish comedy, popular comedy film, energetic movie, fun classic, creative storytelling
Austin Powers International Man of Mystery, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery 1997, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery movie, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery film, Austin Powers International Man of Mystery full movie, comedy adventure, fun comedy, classic 1997 movie, playful humor, secret agent story, lively comedy, character driven film, entertaining movie, memorable characters, humorous adventure, lighthearted story, stylish comedy, popular comedy film, energetic movie, fun classic, creative storytelling
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PersonnesTranscription
00:04:13We have just received word that Dr. Evil is planning a trap for you tonight
00:04:19at the Electric Psychedelic Pussycat Swingers Club here in Swinging London.
00:04:24We'll be there.
00:04:25We'll be there.
00:04:55It's my happening, baby, and it freaks me out.
00:05:00Yeah, man!
00:05:20Can I get you a drink, Mr. Powell?
00:05:22Sure.
00:05:23Austin, we've got to look for Dr. Evil.
00:05:26Wait.
00:05:28I've got an idea.
00:05:30Austin, why on earth did you hit that woman?
00:05:34Right, let me show you, baby.
00:05:36That ain't no woman.
00:05:38It's a man-man.
00:05:42It's one of Dr. Evil's assassins.
00:05:45Look out!
00:05:46He's got a knife!
00:05:47Good work, Mrs. Kensington, all right.
00:05:55Get up!
00:05:56Get up!
00:05:57Right.
00:05:58Where's Dr. Evil, huh?
00:05:59Where is he?
00:06:03There's the bastard.
00:06:07Let's go.
00:06:08He's coming through.
00:06:10Excuse me.
00:06:10I've got you now, Dr. Evil.
00:06:16Not this time.
00:06:18Come, Mr. Bricklesworth.
00:06:21See you in the future, Mr. Powers.
00:06:23He's freezing himself.
00:06:30He's freezing himself.
00:06:43Oh, my God!
00:06:44Oh, my God!
00:06:44Oh, my God!
00:06:44Oh, my God!
00:06:44Oh, my God!
00:06:44Oh, my God!
00:06:45Oh, my God!
00:06:45Oh, my God!
00:06:45Oh, my God!
00:06:46Oh, my God!
00:06:46Oh, my God!
00:06:47Oh, my God!
00:06:47Oh, my God!
00:06:48Oh, my God!
00:06:48Oh, my God!
00:06:49Oh, my God!
00:06:49Oh, my God!
00:06:50Oh, my God!
00:06:51Oh, my God!
00:06:52C'est parti !
00:07:22Yes ?
00:07:24Commander Gilmour ?
00:07:26Speaking.
00:07:27Commander, this is Ritter in Southwest Comm 3.
00:07:29We have a potential bogey with erratic vectoring and unorthodox entry angle.
00:07:33What are you saying, son ?
00:07:36Well, it appears to be in the shape of a big boy.
00:07:38Good God. He's back.
00:07:41Well, in many ways, the big boy never left, sir.
00:07:44He's always offered the same high-quality meals at competitive prices.
00:07:47Shut up.
00:07:49Shall I scramble TAC HQ for an intercept ?
00:07:51What's its current position ?
00:07:53Well, I'm presently tracking it over Nevada.
00:07:56Oh, my God. The big boy's gone.
00:07:58Listen, son.
00:08:00I want you to forget what you saw here today.
00:08:03Phillips ?
00:08:05Call the president.
00:08:06Yes, sir.
00:08:07Prepare the jet.
00:08:09Bring my overnight bag.
00:08:11And, uh, Phillips ?
00:08:13Eat my fish ?
00:08:14Not too much.
00:08:16I'm off to London, England.
00:08:25Powers volunteered to have himself frozen in case Doctor Evil should ever return.
00:08:29Well, I hope your boy's up to it.
00:08:31We don't want to have to bail you guys out again like after WW2.
00:08:36This is our celebrity vault.
00:08:40Please.
00:08:41So who is this Austin Powers ?
00:08:43The ultimate gentleman spy.
00:08:45Irresistible to women.
00:08:46Deadly to his enemies.
00:08:47A legend in his own time.
00:08:49Attention.
00:08:50Stage one.
00:08:51Laser cutting begins.
00:08:52Laser cutting complete.
00:22:17S-titrage ST' 501
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00:22:38VirtuCon alone makes over $9 billion a year.
00:22:42Really?
00:22:43Mm-hmm.
00:22:44That's a lot.
00:22:45OK, then.
00:22:47We hold the world ransom for...
00:22:51$100 billion.
00:22:59Pretty groovy Jumbo Jetta.
00:23:02When you see this Jetta rockin' dough come a-knockin', baby.
00:23:05Yeah!
00:23:06I'm gonna need you to sign these release forms.
00:23:09Release forms?
00:23:10Well, yes, you're not officially working for the Ministry of Defence.
00:23:12And these forms indemnify the Ministry against any mishaps that may occur on the line of duty.
00:23:17Mishaps?
00:23:19But isn't that what being an international man of mystery is all about?
00:23:23OK, name.
00:23:25Austin Danger Powers.
00:23:28Sex?
00:23:29Yes, please.
00:23:31How does a hot chick like you end up working at the Ministry of Defence?
00:23:37Oh.
00:23:38Well, I went to Oxford, where I excelled in several subjects, but I ended up specialising in foreign languages.
00:23:44You know, I really wanted to travel.
00:23:46You know, sort of...
00:23:47See the world.
00:23:48That's fascinating, Vanessa.
00:23:49Listen, why don't we go in the back and shag?
00:23:51What?
00:23:52I've been frozen for 30 years.
00:23:54I've got to see if my bits and pieces are still working.
00:23:56Excuse me.
00:23:57My wedding tackle.
00:23:58I'm sorry.
00:23:59My meat and two vids.
00:24:00My twigging berries.
00:24:01Hello, lads.
00:24:02Oh, no, Mr. Powers.
00:24:03Mr. Powers, please.
00:24:04I'd appreciate it if you could concentrate on our mission and give your libido a rest.
00:24:12Can I, er...
00:24:14Can I show you something?
00:24:17If you're feeling sad and lonely
00:24:21There's a service I can render
00:24:25Tell the one who loves you only
00:24:29I can be so warm and tender
00:24:32I won't bite...
00:24:34Hard.
00:24:40All right.
00:24:43Let me ask you a question.
00:24:45And be honest.
00:24:48Oh!
00:24:49Do I make you horny?
00:24:51Randy?
00:24:52Do I make you horny, baby?
00:24:54Yeah, do I?
00:24:55God, I hope this is part of the unfreezing process.
00:24:58Oh, terminate!
00:24:59Oh, look at that!
00:25:00Oh, terminate!
00:25:01Oh, I fell over!
00:25:03Oh, I fell over again!
00:25:05Oh!
00:25:06Mr. Powers!
00:25:08I will never have sex with you.
00:25:10Ever.
00:25:11If you were the last man on Earth and I was the last woman on Earth
00:25:14And the future of the human race depends on our having sex simply for procreation
00:25:18I still would not have sex with you.
00:25:21What's your point, Vanessa?
00:25:23Remember when we froze your semen?
00:25:24You said if it didn't look like you were coming back, we should try to make you a son so that a part of you could live forever.
00:25:38Oh, sure.
00:25:39Well, after a couple of years, we got a little impatient.
00:25:41Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
00:25:43My son?
00:25:44Yeah.
00:25:45Scott!
00:25:46Hello, Scott.
00:25:47Hello, Scott.
00:25:48Hello, Scott.
00:25:49Hi.
00:25:50Hi.
00:25:51Oh, sure.
00:25:51Well, after a couple of years, we got a little impatient.
00:25:57Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
00:26:01My son?
00:26:03Yeah.
00:26:04Scott!
00:26:14Hello, Scott.
00:26:16Hi.
00:26:18I'm your father.
00:26:21Dr. Evil.
00:26:25I haven't seen you my whole life, and now you come back and just expect a relationship?
00:26:31I hate you.
00:26:36What?
00:26:37Could I have a hug?
00:26:40No.
00:26:42Give me a hug.
00:26:43No way.
00:26:44Come here.
00:26:44I'm not coming over there.
00:26:45Let's go.
00:26:46Forget it.
00:26:46Pronto.
00:26:47What are you doing?
00:26:48I'm with it.
00:26:49I'm hip.
00:26:52Duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a-duck-a.
00:27:01Huh?
00:27:05Well, don't look at me like I'm freaking Frankenstein.
00:27:08Give your father a hug.
00:27:10You're...
00:27:10Hey, don't touch me.
00:27:12Hug.
00:27:13Hug.
00:27:14Tu n'as pas l'impression qu'il n'y a pas l'air d'aller à la fin de la fin de la fin de la fin de la fin de la fin de la fin de la fin de la fin.
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00:29:48Nice!
00:29:50Nice!
00:29:54Nice!
00:29:56Nice!
00:29:58Nice!
00:30:00Hit me.
00:30:01You have 17, sir.
00:30:04I like to live dangerously.
00:30:06Four, 21.
00:30:10Five.
00:30:11I'll stay.
00:30:12I suggest you hit, sir.
00:30:14I also like to live dangerously.
00:30:16As you wish, sir.
00:30:18Twenty beats your five.
00:30:19I'm sorry, sir.
00:30:20Well, I won't lie to you.
00:30:21Cards are not my bag, baby.
00:30:22Allow myself to introduce myself.
00:30:23Myself.
00:30:24Yeah.
00:30:25Yeah.
00:30:26My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:27My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:28I'm not my bag, baby.
00:30:31My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:32And this is my wife, Oprah.
00:30:33My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:34My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:36My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:37And this is my wife, Oprah.
00:30:38My name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:39My name is Ritchie.
00:30:40And this is my wife, Oprah.
00:30:43My name is number two.
00:30:45This is my Italian confidential secretary.
00:30:48Her name is Ritchie Cunningham.
00:30:50And his wife, Oprah, and I offer my wife, two and I offer me.
00:30:53Oh, no, no, no.
00:30:54I have no, no, no, no.
00:30:55Et ce n'est pas ma femme, Oprah.
00:31:00Mon nom est numéro 2.
00:31:02Ce n'est pas mon confédant de confédant.
00:31:05Elle n'est pas Alotta.
00:31:07Alotta-fagina.
00:31:10Comme encore?
00:31:11Alotta-fagina.
00:31:13Ah, je me suis désolée.
00:31:15Vous avez dit que votre nom est Alotta-fagina.
00:31:19C'est bon.
00:31:20C'est bon.
00:31:23C'est bon.
00:31:24C'est bon.
00:31:25C'est bon.
00:31:26C'est bon.
00:31:27C'est bon.
00:31:28Si vous excusez, je vais aller à la petite petite fille.
00:31:33Vous gardez l'œil sur l'Italien, Bert.
00:31:35Nous allons retourner à la suite de la suite.
00:31:50Vous avez n'a vu rien.
00:31:55Vous avez n'a vu rien.
00:31:56C'est bon.
00:32:00C'est bon.
00:32:15Atti.
00:32:20C'est bon.
00:32:23C'est bon.
00:32:24C'est bon.
00:32:25C'est bon.
00:32:26Oui, merci.
00:32:27Vous êtes en train de faire ?
00:32:28Non, je suis en anglais.
00:32:31C'est bon.
00:32:33Non.
00:32:45D'accord.
00:32:46OK.
00:32:48C'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon.
00:33:18C'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon.
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00:37:36Oh, ça a été trop long.
00:37:38Ok, alors je vais devoir aller, mami, mais je veux vous.
00:37:41Ciao, darling.
00:37:48A limo's just pulled up.
00:37:50Let me see.
00:37:54That's Dr. Evil's cat.
00:37:56How can you tell?
00:37:57I never forget a pussy.
00:37:59Cat.
00:38:02Oh, no, he's gone away.
00:38:07My God, Vanessa.
00:38:09You are so incredibly beautiful.
00:38:13That's it.
00:38:14Yes, yes, yes.
00:38:16Come on, darling.
00:38:17I'm going to take you out for a night on the town.
00:38:31Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Bert Bacharach.
00:38:34What the world needs now is love, sweet love.
00:38:44No, not just for some, but everyone.
00:38:49What the world needs now is love, sweet love.
00:38:59Not just for some, but for everyone.
00:39:10Not just for some people.
00:39:11Don't miss, come on, Come on, put the truth in the church.
00:39:13Oh, yes.
00:39:14You're all the stars.
00:39:15Let's go.
00:39:16We have a tour of and every tour.
00:39:18We are here.
00:39:19Okay.
00:39:20Come on.
00:39:21We'll take you out of the church.
00:39:30We'll go.
00:39:35Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:40:05...
00:40:07Why take the stairs when I could take the escalator?
00:40:16Why take the escalator when I've got a perfectly good canoe?
00:40:23I know what. I'll take the elevator.
00:40:30Austin?
00:40:31Yes?
00:40:32Come and have some champagne with me.
00:40:35OK.
00:40:37Oh, I tripped.
00:40:39You know, I haven't had this much fun since college.
00:40:42Well, I'm sorry.
00:40:44Why?
00:40:45I'm sorry that bug up your arse had to die.
00:40:51Always wanting to have fun, Austin. That's you in a nutshell.
00:40:55No, this is me in a nutshell. Help! I'm in a nutshell!
00:40:58How did I get into this nutshell?
00:41:00Look at the size of this bloody great big nutshell. What sort of shell has a nut like this? I mean, this is crazy.
00:41:07Yes, look at you.
00:41:10You're smashed.
00:41:12No, I'm not.
00:41:13Yes, you are.
00:41:14No, I'm not. I'm a sensible one. I'm always a designated driver.
00:41:17Kiss me.
00:41:22I can't, darling.
00:41:23Why not?
00:41:24Because you're drunk. It's not right.
00:41:25No, I'm not drunk. I'm just beginning to see what my mummy was talking about all those years ago.
00:41:30I can't.
00:41:31All right, well, tell me all about my mummy in the 60s. I'm dying to know what she was like.
00:41:39She was very groovy.
00:41:44Your dad loved her very much.
00:41:49If there was one other cat in this world that could have loved her and treated her as well as your dad,
00:41:55then it was me.
00:41:57But unfortunately,
00:42:00for yours truly,
00:42:05that train has sailed.
00:42:11Vanessa?
00:42:13Vanessa, hello.
00:42:16Come on, run over.
00:42:18Sleepy time.
00:42:19Okay.
00:42:22Okay.
00:42:24Okay, Austin needs his hand back.
00:42:26Come on.
00:42:34You've got mail.
00:42:36Hello, Austin.
00:42:38This is Basil Exposition from British Intelligence.
00:42:41Now, I want you to find out what part Verticon plays in something called Project Vulcan.
00:42:46Project Vulcan.
00:42:47I'll need you to go to a Lotta Vagina's penthouse immediately.
00:43:16Hello, hello.
00:43:19Hello.
00:43:22Okay, all right.
00:43:24This is magic.
00:43:25Okay.
00:43:26Yes, yes.
00:43:27Okay, great.
00:43:32Project Vulcan.
00:43:34Yeah, okay.
00:43:36Cheeky, huh?
00:43:37Yeah.
00:43:38Come on, baby.
00:43:39Give it to me.
00:43:40Yes, yes, yes.
00:43:41No, no!
00:43:42You seem surprised to see me, Miss Vagina.
00:43:52What do you want, Mr... Cunningham, was it?
00:43:58Your boss.
00:43:59Number two.
00:44:01I understand that cat's involved in big underground drills.
00:44:06How did you know?
00:44:08I didn't pay me.
00:44:09You just told me.
00:44:12We can talk about business later.
00:44:14Let me slip into something more comfortable.
00:44:17Oh, behave.
00:44:30Good God!
00:44:31Please, make me laugh.
00:44:32Please, make me laugh.
00:44:33Well, I'd like to throw you in the morning, I bet.
00:44:35But...
00:44:37Please make me laugh.
00:44:38And take me some of the many more.
00:44:39I'm going to use all of the movies.
00:44:41I'm going to put my equipment on the Earth.
00:44:43The people of the house are my first dream.
00:44:45I'm going to make me laugh.
00:44:46You're so cute.
00:44:47I'm going to keep it off.
00:44:48I'm going to keep it off.
00:44:50The people that I don't want to keep it off.
00:44:51I'm going out.
00:44:52I'm going to make a young girl.
00:44:53There's a new house for a boy.
00:44:54I'm going to keep it off.
00:44:55Every lady my wife can make me a bit.
00:44:56I've got a lot of fun.
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00:49:35Austin, I want to show you something.
00:49:38We're going to outfit you with this.
00:49:40It looks like a watch, but in fact, it's a geosynchronous positioning device.
00:49:45Very shagadelic.
00:49:47And then there's this.
00:49:49Okay, let me guess.
00:49:51The floss is garrote wire, the toothpaste is plastic explosives,
00:49:56and the toothbrush is the detonation device.
00:49:59No, actually.
00:50:01Well, since you've been frozen,
00:50:03there have been fabulous advances in the field of dentistry.
00:50:06What do you mean?
00:50:08Nothing.
00:50:10Oh, look, here's Basil.
00:50:11Hello, exposition.
00:50:12Austin, let me bring you up to speed.
00:50:16Dr Evil has hijacked a nuclear warhead from Kreblakistan.
00:50:20Only two things scare me,
00:50:22and one is nuclear war.
00:50:24What's the other?
00:50:25Excuse me?
00:50:26What's the other thing that scares you?
00:50:29Carnies.
00:50:30What?
00:50:31Circus folk.
00:50:33Nomads, you know.
00:50:34Smell like cabbage.
00:50:36Small hands.
00:50:38Oh, indeed.
00:50:40Perhaps these photographs are the last piece of the puzzle.
00:50:43Aha.
00:50:44I've uncovered the details of Project Vulcan.
00:50:47Oh, good God.
00:50:47An underground missile?
00:50:49Austin, where did you find these?
00:50:51Austin did some reconnaissance work last night
00:50:53at Allotta Vagina's penthouse.
00:50:57Our next move is to infiltrate VirtuCon.
00:51:01Any ideas?
00:51:03Oh, yes.
00:51:04VirtuCon runs a tour of its facility every hour.
00:51:07I thought perhaps we could disguise ourselves as tourists
00:51:10and do some on-site reconnaissance.
00:51:13Top draw, Kensington.
00:51:15Oh, uh, Austin, I'd like you to meet somebody.
00:51:18This is my mother, Mrs. Exposition.
00:51:22How do you do?
00:51:24Austin!
00:51:26My God, man, what have you done?
00:51:28That's not your mother.
00:51:30It's a man, baby!
00:51:31Yeah, yeah!
00:51:33Come on!
00:51:33Why won't this wing come up?
00:51:36Help!
00:51:38Austin!
00:51:39Yeah, hold on, hold on.
00:51:39No, no, my mother!
00:51:42Oh, my mother.
00:51:44Mother, are you all right?
00:51:45Oh, dear, man, Austin, have you gone mad?
00:51:47No.
00:51:49You have a lot of explaining to do.
00:51:51I'm sorry, Basil, I thought she was a man.
00:51:54Damn it, man, you're talking about my mother!
00:51:56Well, you have to admit she is rather mannish.
00:51:59Austin!
00:51:59Well, no offence, but if that is a woman,
00:52:02it does look like she was beaten with an ugly stick.
00:52:05What?
00:52:05Really, Austin.
00:52:06Austin.
00:52:09Okay, give in to the beauty of your feelings
00:52:16and say the words.
00:52:18Come on.
00:52:19I love you, Dad.
00:52:22I love you, kids.
00:52:24That's a great group.
00:52:26Thank you.
00:52:27Thank you.
00:52:27Thank you.
00:52:28Thank you.
00:52:29Thank you.
00:52:29Thank you.
00:52:30Okay, group.
00:52:31We have some newcomers here today with us.
00:52:34Say hello to Scott and his father, Mr. Evel?
00:52:39Evel, actually.
00:52:44Dr. Evel.
00:52:45Hello, Dr. Evel.
00:52:48Hello, Scott.
00:52:50Hello, everybody.
00:52:52So, Scott, why don't we start with you?
00:52:54What brings you here with us today?
00:52:57Well, I just really met my dad for the first time five days ago.
00:53:00I was partially frozen his whole life.
00:53:03That is beautiful that you can admit to that.
00:53:07He comes back and now he wants me to take over the family business.
00:53:10But, Scott, who's going to take over the world when I die?
00:53:14Listen to the words he used.
00:53:16Who's going to take over the world when I die?
00:53:19Feels like that to some of us sometimes, doesn't it?
00:53:22So, what do you want to do, Scott?
00:53:26I don't know.
00:53:27I was thinking I like animals.
00:53:30Maybe I'd be a vet.
00:53:31An evil vet?
00:53:32No.
00:53:33Maybe like work in a petting zoo.
00:53:35An evil petting zoo?
00:53:37You always do that!
00:53:38What?
00:53:39What?
00:53:40I just think, like, he hates me.
00:53:44I really think he wants to kill me.
00:53:45Now, Scott, we don't want to kill each other in here.
00:53:49We might say that we do sometimes, but we really don't.
00:53:54Actually, the boy's quite astute.
00:53:56I really am trying to kill him, but so far and successfully,
00:54:00he's quite wily like his old man.
00:54:04This is what I'm talking about.
00:54:06Okay, well, we've heard from you, Scott.
00:54:10Now, uh, you, tell us a little about yourself.
00:54:13The details of my life are quite inconsequential.
00:54:17Oh, no, please, please.
00:54:19Let's hear about your childhood.
00:54:21Okay.
00:54:21Come on, come on, come on, come on, please.
00:54:25Very well.
00:54:26Where do I begin?
00:54:29My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery.
00:54:36My mother was a 15-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.
00:54:42My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark.
00:54:50Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy,
00:54:54the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.
00:55:01My childhood was typical.
00:55:03Summers in Rangoon, luge lesson.
00:55:06In the spring, we'd make meat helmets.
00:55:10When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds.
00:55:14Pretty standard, really.
00:55:17At the age of 12, I received my first scribe.
00:55:20At the age of 14, as a roastery named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.
00:55:26There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum.
00:55:29It's breathtaking.
00:55:30I suggest you try it.
00:55:32You know, we have to stop.
00:55:34Austin, can I have a word with you?
00:55:37Of course you may, love.
00:55:42Look, I know I'm being neurotic, but I can't shake off this suspicious feeling about that Italian secretary.
00:55:48You know, Miss Vagina.
00:55:49I don't want to sound paranoid, but I've had some bad relationships in the past, and I have been known to be jealous.
00:55:57I'm sorry.
00:55:58Now, don't be sorry, baby.
00:56:01You're right to be suspicious.
00:56:03I shagged her.
00:56:04What?
00:56:05I shagged her rotten, baby, yeah.
00:56:09I don't believe you, Austin.
00:56:10She was repellent.
00:56:12Saucer of milk, table two.
00:56:14Meow.
00:56:15Did you use protection?
00:56:16Of course.
00:56:17I had my nine millimetre automatic.
00:56:19You know I meant, did you use a condom?
00:56:22No.
00:56:23Only sailors use condoms, baby.
00:56:26Not in the 90s, Austin.
00:56:28Well, they should, those filthy beggars.
00:56:29They go from port to port.
00:56:31Well, Vanessa, don't have a thrombo.
00:56:34A lotter meant nothing to me.
00:56:36Well, it means something to me.
00:56:38Austin, if you want us to have a relationship, you have to get it into your head that times have changed.
00:56:43You can't just go off shagging anybody anymore, and if you could, I wouldn't because I'm not like that.
00:56:49Vanessa.
00:56:53You're everything to me.
00:56:55You just don't get it, do you?
00:56:59Good night, Austin.
00:57:00Welcome to the 90s.
00:57:03You're going to be very lonely.
00:57:04You're going to be very lonely.
00:57:04You're going to be very lonely.
00:59:24C'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon.
00:59:54C'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon.
01:00:24Careful, Austen.
01:00:30Watch out!
01:00:33Watch out!
01:00:36C'est parti, c'est parti, c'est parti
01:00:44Oh, merci de m'avoir fait, Austin
01:00:49All right, stay very cool, baby
01:01:06Mr. Powers, welcome to my underground lair
01:01:22You're just in time, enjoy the share
01:01:25Gentlemen, I give you the Vulcan
01:01:34The world's most powerful subterranean drill
01:01:39Does that make you hominy?
01:01:42Not now, Austin
01:01:43So powerful it can penetrate the Earth's crust
01:01:46Delivering a 50-kiloton nuclear warhead deep into the liquid hot core of the planet
01:01:51Upon detonation, every volcano on Earth will erupt
01:01:56It seems we have no choice but to pay your ransom
01:02:02You have my instructions, bye-bye
01:02:06Check it out, bud-head
01:02:09This chick has three boobs
01:02:11How many butts does she have?
01:02:15Do you like your quasi-futuristic clothes, Mr. Powers?
01:02:26I designed them myself
01:02:28Scott, Scott, my boy, how are you?
01:02:47How was your day?
01:02:48Well, my friend sweet Jay took me to that video arcade in town, right?
01:02:51And they don't speak English there
01:02:52So Jay got into a fight
01:02:54And he's all, hey, quit hassling me
01:02:55Because I don't speak French or whatever
01:02:57And then the guy says something in Paris talk
01:02:59And I'm like, just back off
01:03:00And they're all, get out
01:03:01And we're like, make me
01:03:03That's cool
01:03:04Fascinating
01:03:07What are your plans for this evening?
01:03:09I thought I'd stay in
01:03:10There's a good titty movie on Skin and Max
01:03:12And that's how you'd like to live your life, is it?
01:03:16Yeah
01:03:16Pretty much worth it
01:03:19Why?
01:03:20Yeah
01:03:20Scott
01:03:28I want you to meet Daddy's nemesis, Austin Powers
01:03:33What, are you feeding him?
01:03:36Why don't you just kill him?
01:03:37No, Scott, I have an even better idea
01:03:40I'm going to place him in an easily escapable situation
01:03:44Involving an overly elaborate and exotic death
01:03:46Why don't you just shoot him now?
01:03:50I mean, I'll go get a gun
01:03:51We'll shoot him together
01:03:52It'll be fun
01:03:52Bang!
01:03:53Dead
01:03:54Done
01:03:54One more peep out of you
01:03:56And you are grounded, mister
01:03:57And I am not joking
01:03:58All right, let's begin
01:04:03Dr. Evil
01:04:04Do you really expect them to pay?
01:04:08No, Mr. Powers
01:04:09I expect them to die
01:04:13Even after they pay me the money
01:04:16I'm still going to melt every city on the planet
01:04:19With liquid hot magma
01:04:20Release the sharks!
01:04:25Mr. Powers
01:04:26You'll notice that all of the sharks
01:04:28Have laser beams attached to their heads
01:04:30I figure every creature deserves a warm meal
01:04:32Dr. Evil
01:04:36It's about the sharks
01:04:38When you were frozen
01:04:40They were put on the endangered species list
01:04:43We tried to get some
01:04:45But it would have taken months to clear up the red tape
01:04:47You know, I have one simple request
01:04:51And that is to have sharks with frickin' laser beams
01:04:55Attached to their heads
01:04:57Now, evidently, my cycloptic colleague informs me that that can't be done
01:05:02Can you remind me what I pay you people for?
01:05:06Honestly, throw me a phone here
01:05:07What do we have?
01:05:10Sea bass
01:05:11Right
01:05:16They are mutated, sea bass
01:05:20Really?
01:05:22Are they ill-tempered?
01:05:24Absolutely
01:05:24Well, that's a starch, you know
01:05:26All right, guard
01:05:28Begin the unnecessarily slow-moving dipping mechanism
01:05:31Close the tank!
01:05:37Wait, aren't you even going to watch them?
01:05:39They could get away
01:05:40No, no, no
01:05:41I'm going to leave them alone
01:05:42And not actually witness them dying
01:05:44I'm just going to assume it all went to plan
01:05:46What?
01:05:48I have a gun in my room
01:05:50You give me five seconds, I'll get it
01:05:51I'll come back down here
01:05:53Boom!
01:05:53I'll blow their brains out
01:05:55Scott
01:05:56You just don't get it, do you?
01:06:00You don't
01:06:01It's no hassle
01:06:04But
01:06:05All I'm saying
01:06:08They're going to get a
01:06:09I
01:06:10I'm just
01:06:11We
01:06:12We
01:06:13Knock, knock
01:06:14Who's there?
01:06:15Shh
01:06:15Look
01:06:17Let me tell you a little story about a man named
01:06:19Shh
01:06:19Even before you start
01:06:22That was a pre-emptive shh
01:06:24Just know I have a whole bag of shh
01:06:26With your name on it
01:06:29What's your plan?
01:06:36First, I plan to soil myself
01:06:38Then I'm going to regroup and come up with a new plan
01:06:41Any thoughts?
01:06:43Wait a minute
01:06:44I always have this with me, just in case
01:06:48Okay, I get it
01:06:49I have bad teeth
01:06:51No, Austin
01:06:53The floss is to swing ourselves onto the ledge
01:06:55Oh
01:06:57All right, hold on
01:06:59Got it
01:07:02Okay
01:07:03Toothpaste
01:07:04Hello
01:07:05Gino chop
01:07:10Hang on
01:07:14Gino trip
01:07:24No
01:07:28Not a good time to lose one's head
01:07:43Oh, indeed
01:07:44That's not the way to get a head in life
01:07:47No
01:07:48It's a shame he wasn't more headstrong
01:07:52He'll never be the head of a major corporation
01:07:57Okay, that'll do
01:07:58Okay
01:07:58No, what are we going to do?
01:08:07Oh, look, there's an emergency exit
01:08:09Go get help
01:08:10I'm going to stay here and keep an eye on Dr. Evil
01:08:12Okay
01:08:13I'll hurry back
01:08:14Listen, Vanessa
01:08:18Whatever happens
01:08:21I want you to know that I feel really bad about that Italian bird
01:08:27What I'm trying to say is
01:08:30That if you want me to be a one-woman man
01:08:34Well, that's just groovy, baby
01:08:37Behave
01:08:39I want you to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know that I'm going to know
01:09:09Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:09:39Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:10:09Hello, hello.
01:10:38Hello, Mr. Powers.
01:10:40Care to have a little fun?
01:10:44No, actually, I have to save the world.
01:10:48Is it cold in here?
01:11:00No, it's cold in here.
01:11:10I'm the pro!
01:11:20No!
01:11:24No!
01:11:26No!
01:11:36No!
01:11:37No!
01:11:38No!
01:11:39I've got to get Dr. Evil!
01:11:40No!
01:11:41No!
01:11:42No!
01:11:43Baseball!
01:11:44Cold showers!
01:11:45Baseball!
01:11:46Cold showers!
01:11:47Give it up, Mr. Powers.
01:11:48Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!
01:11:50Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!
01:11:52Gentlemen!
01:11:53Let's lock and load!
01:11:54Right, lads!
01:11:55All right!
01:11:56Up, up, up, up, up!
01:11:57Let's go!
01:11:58Let's go!
01:11:59You can't resist us, Mr. Powers.
01:12:00You can't resist us, Mr. Powers.
01:12:01You can't resist us, Mr. Powers.
01:12:02You can't resist us, Mr. Powers.
01:12:03Au contraire, baby.
01:12:04I think you can't resist me.
01:12:05You can't resist us, Mr. Powers.
01:12:06Au contraire, baby.
01:12:07I think you can't resist me!
01:12:08You're the one who makes me go money.
01:12:12You're the son who makes me shine.
01:12:26When you're around, I'm always laughing.
01:12:31C'est parti !
01:13:01C'est parti !
01:13:31C'est parti !
01:14:01C'est parti !
01:14:03C'est parti !
01:14:05C'est parti !
01:14:07C'est parti !
01:14:09C'est parti !
01:14:11C'est parti !
01:14:13C'est parti !
01:14:15C'est parti !
01:14:17C'est parti !
01:14:19C'est parti !
01:14:21C'est parti !
01:14:23C'est parti !
01:14:25C'est parti !
01:14:27C'est parti !
01:14:29C'est parti !
01:14:31C'est parti !
01:14:33C'est parti !
01:14:35C'est parti !
01:14:37C'est parti !
01:14:39C'est parti !
01:15:11C'est parti !
01:15:13C'est parti !
01:15:15C'est parti !
01:15:17C'est parti !
01:15:19C'est parti !
01:15:21C'est parti !
01:15:23C'est parti !
01:15:25C'est parti !
01:15:27C'est parti !
01:15:29C'est parti !
01:15:31C'est parti !
01:15:33C'est parti !
01:15:35C'est parti !
01:15:36C'est parti !
01:15:37C'est parti !
01:15:38C'est parti !
01:15:39C'est parti !
01:15:40C'est parti !
01:15:41C'est parti !
01:15:42C'est parti !
01:15:43C'est parti !
01:15:44C'est parti !
01:15:45C'est parti !
01:15:46C'est parti !
01:15:47C'est parti !
01:15:48C'est parti !
01:15:49C'est parti !
01:15:50C'est parti !
01:15:51C'est parti !
01:15:52C'est parti !
01:15:53C'est parti !
01:15:54C'est parti !
01:15:55C'est parti !
01:15:56C'est parti !
01:15:57C'est parti !
01:15:58C'est parti !
01:15:59C'est parti !
01:16:00C'est parti !
01:16:01C'est parti !
01:16:02C'est parti !
01:16:03C'est parti !
01:16:04Din din
01:16:06I want chicken
01:16:09I want liver
01:16:10Meow mix, meow mix
01:16:11Please deliver
01:16:13I've got you now Dr. Evil
01:16:16Well done Mr. Powers
01:16:19We're not so different
01:16:22You and I
01:16:23However
01:16:25Isn't it ironic
01:16:27That the very things that you stand for
01:16:29Free love
01:16:31Swinging
01:16:32Parties are all
01:16:34Now in the 90s
01:16:36Considered to be
01:16:38Evil
01:16:41No man
01:16:42What we swingers were rebelling against
01:16:45Is uptight squares like you
01:16:47Whose bag was money
01:16:49And world domination
01:16:50We were innocent man
01:16:51If we'd known the consequences of our sexual liberation
01:16:55We would have done things differently
01:16:57But the spirit would have remained the same
01:16:59It's freedom baby
01:17:01Yeah
01:17:02Face it
01:17:03Freedom failed
01:17:05No man
01:17:07Freedom didn't fail
01:17:08Right now we've got freedom
01:17:10And responsibility
01:17:12It's a very groovy time
01:17:14There's nothing more pathetic
01:17:16Than an aging hipster
01:17:18Alright Baldi
01:17:19Shut your cakehole
01:17:20Come on
01:17:21Let's go
01:17:21On your bike
01:17:22Not so fast
01:17:25It seems the tables have turned
01:17:27Mr. Powers
01:17:28Go ahead Olsen
01:17:30Don't worry about me
01:17:31Hey I can take my Sega
01:17:33Right dad
01:17:33It seems the tables have turned again
01:17:37Dr. Evil
01:17:38Not really
01:17:39Kill the little bastard
01:17:40See what I care
01:17:41But dad we just had a breakthrough in group
01:17:43I had the group liquidated you little shit
01:17:46They were insolent
01:17:47I hate you
01:17:49I hate you
01:17:50I wish I was never artificially created in a lab
01:17:52Oh Scott that hurts daddy when you say that
01:17:54Honestly
01:17:55Ah
01:17:57Number two
01:17:59Your timing is impeccable
01:18:01Go ahead
01:18:01Take Mr. Powers away
01:18:02No
01:18:04What?
01:18:07Dr. Evil
01:18:07I spent 30 years of my life
01:18:10Turning this two-bit evil empire into a world-class multinational
01:18:15I was going to have a cover story in Forbes
01:18:18But you like an idiot wanted to take over the world
01:18:22And you don't realize there is no world anymore
01:18:24It's only corporations
01:18:26Silence number two
01:18:28No
01:18:28I've had enough of you pushing me around
01:18:32Mr. Powers
01:18:36I have a business proposition you might find very interesting
01:18:39All right
01:18:42I've had enough
01:18:43Judah
01:18:49Let's go
01:19:02This place is going to blow
01:19:06Come on
01:19:18Let's go
01:19:19Please
01:19:26Come on baby
01:19:27It's going to blow
01:19:28Let's go
01:19:29Move it
01:19:30Alley
01:19:31Alley
01:19:32Alley
01:19:33Alley
01:19:34Alley
01:19:35Alley
01:19:36Alley
01:19:37Alley
01:19:38Alley
01:19:39Alley
01:19:40Alley
01:19:41Alley
01:19:42Alley
01:19:43Alley
01:19:44Alley
01:19:45Alley
01:19:46Alley
01:19:47Alley
01:19:48Alley
01:19:49Alley
01:19:50Alley
01:19:51Alley
01:19:52Alley
01:19:53Alley
01:19:54Alley
01:19:55Alley
01:19:56Alley
01:19:57Oh, yeah.
01:20:08I love you, Mr. Powers.
01:20:11And I love you, Mrs. Powers.
01:20:16Oh, that'll be Basil Exposition.
01:20:20Oh, ignore it, Austen. Come back to bed.
01:20:22Duty calls, baby.
01:20:27Hello, Austen. Oh, I hope I'm not interrupting your honeymoon.
01:20:33No, not at all, Basil.
01:20:35Did you get that fruit basket I sent you?
01:20:37Yes, we did, Basil, but you sent too much.
01:20:40I'm going to have to send some to my mother.
01:20:42Oh, don't forget these.
01:20:44Oh, thanks.
01:20:45There you go.
01:20:47Did you get my other gift?
01:20:48We did.
01:20:50Yes, Basil, nice rack.
01:20:53But who in the world gave us this drawing?
01:20:56It's bizarre.
01:20:58Well, as you know, Dr. Evil has escaped in his rocket, which has disappeared from our tracking system.
01:21:04Oh, dear. Hold on. Coffee?
01:21:06Oh, yes, please.
01:21:07Okay, thank you.
01:21:09Oh, and Vanessa, by the way, you have been made a full agent.
01:21:13Oh, that's fantastic, Basil. Thanks.
01:21:16Milk?
01:21:17Yes, please.
01:21:18And Austen, Her Majesty the Queen informs me that you are to be knighted.
01:21:23Very shagadelic.
01:21:25Well, the best of luck to both of you.
01:21:28Thanks, Basil.
01:21:29Goodbye.
01:21:30You know, Vanessa, I'll never forget the first time I saw you.
01:21:35You were so incredibly beautiful.
01:21:37So incredibly sexy.
01:21:42I knew I had to have you.
01:21:45Right then and there.
01:21:49Did you feel the same way?
01:21:52Actually, I couldn't stop staring at your teeth.
01:21:54Oh.
01:21:55Oh, I ordered some champagne.
01:21:59Come in.
01:22:00Oh, lovely, Austen.
01:22:02Right over there's fine.
01:22:03Thank you.
01:22:04Let's go out on the terrace.
01:22:05It's a beautiful night.
01:22:06We can look at the stars.
01:22:07Smashing idea, man.
01:22:10Look at you.
01:22:11Look at you.
01:22:12Look at you.
01:22:14Look at you.
01:22:15Look out!
01:22:16Oh.
01:22:19That really hurt.
01:22:22I'm going to have a lump there, you idiot.
01:22:24Who throws a shoe?
01:22:26Honestly.
01:22:28You fight like a woman.
01:22:29Honestly, it's not mine.
01:22:50No.
01:22:51Use it.
01:22:57Whoa.
01:22:59Look how beautiful the night sky is.
01:23:20Hey, isn't that the Big Dipper?
01:23:22Yeah, and that looks just like Uranus.
01:23:26Austen.
01:23:26Well, you know.
01:23:27Hey, I've never seen that big star before.
01:23:30Yeah, what is that?
01:23:35Good God.
01:23:41I'm going to get you, Austen Powers.
01:23:45It's freaking freezing in here, Mr. Bigglesworth.
01:23:48I'm going to get you, I'm going to get you.
01:23:51I'm going to keep you.
01:23:55Ah.
01:23:55Austen Powers.
01:23:57He's the name for you.
01:24:07Austen Powers.
01:24:10Austen Powers.
01:24:11He's the name for you.
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