- 19 hours ago
Bu video Dailymotion Python SDK ile yüklendi.
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Oh
00:16Stop moving hands up easy soldier have some coffee this weather's freezing my balls
00:30Oh
00:40Sir this con man was trying to talk his way into our secure facility
00:46Con man, this is Damien Blaine CEO of Atlas Defense Group our top military contractor
00:53He single-handedly controls the global arms trade. I'm sorry, sir. I'm a fool, sir
01:00Please sir, forgive me for my stupidity
01:04At ease soldier step aside
01:15Gentlemen your Arsenal's best intercontinental ballistic missile takes 27 minutes to reach its target across the globe
01:21Give me our enemies 27 minutes to prepare and launch retaliatory strikes
01:26It's a weak spot, but we can't do any better
01:28It's impossible impossible isn't in my vocabulary. We can do better. I
01:36Have I got it down from 27 minutes to only three
01:43I thought you'd be skeptical
01:45So how about a show-and-tell?
01:47Gentlemen I present to you the Titan missile now you can strike anywhere in the world in just three minutes
01:53We'll take all of it no matter the cost we'll take it all
02:08Thought you'd say so good
02:10Now before you leave the president would like to host you for dinner
02:14Well, I'm honored, but please tell the president. I'm unavailable tonight. I have other plans
02:19You're standing up president
02:22What plans could be more important?
02:24Well general as you can imagine I sell weapons for a living and my father's worried that I'll die single
02:30So tonight I'm going on a date to find my future wife
02:40When we get married and merge our family companies your Olsen group will double its value
02:48It's a win-win for me
02:50Because I get richer and get to bone a hottie like you any time I want
03:02My father is forcing me to find a rich husband, but it won't be an immature frat boy like you trying to leech off my family
03:08Get lost creeps
03:14So what do you do for a living well, uh, I'm
03:20My father's demanding I settle down
03:22But I don't want a wife when he wants me for my money
03:25I'm in sales. What about you sir?
03:28Sales?
03:29How much do you make?
03:31But does that really matter?
03:33Yeah
03:36Okay, um in a good year 50 or 60 grand
03:42Good Lord if you you can't even get a one-bedroom rental on that. Oh
03:47Oh
03:49I cannot believe my daddy set me up with someone so
03:53poor
03:55Why don't we get to know each other a bit before discussing money?
03:58Hmm pass money's the only thing that matters
04:03What a waste of my time
04:05I passed up dinner with the president for this day talk about a waste of time and I meant 50 or 60 million
04:18Had a bad date, huh?
04:21Tell me about it. I threw a drink in his face
04:25My father is going to be furious and cut me off unless
04:29I was just starting to like your smile
04:32And he'll cut you off unless
04:36This might sound crazy, but I would make it worth your while
04:40I'll
04:41Would you want to get married?
04:47Married
04:49You really bring new meaning to moving fast on the first date. Oh?
04:53Is this a date?
04:55It is a Friday night
04:56It's a really nice place and
05:00You look fantastic
05:03This is the best date I've had in ages
05:04Okay
05:06Since it's a date, I'll get right to the getting to know me phase
05:10My family's business is struggling
05:12My father, a very traditional man
05:15Has got it in his head that the solution to our problems
05:18Is marrying me off to some rich snob
05:20I'm flattered
05:22But what makes you think I fit the rich man profile?
05:25Doesn't matter
05:26I don't care how much you make
05:28I just need to get married to get my parents off my back while I fix our business
05:32Contract marriage
05:34Ah, that could work too
05:36I know it's a crazy thing to ask
05:39But I could pay you $10,000
05:42All you'd have to do is play along and
05:44That won't be necessary
05:46I'd marry you for free
05:51So I suppose my soon-to-be wife should know my name
05:55I'm Damien
05:57Iris Olsen
05:59Pleasure to meet you
05:59Pleasure to meet you
06:01Hope you don't have any Christmas plans
06:03Because as my fiance, I need you to come meet my family
06:08Looking forward to it
06:15Mr. Damien, Merry Christmas
06:16Merry Christmas
06:17These are the Christmas gifts that you got for the Olsen's
06:20They're worth hundreds of millions so please let me securely deliver them to them
06:24No need
06:25I'll deliver them myself
06:27But this is a company SUV
06:29I'm a little confused
06:31You're the Olsen's honored guests and they didn't get you a car
06:34Do they realize who you are?
06:36I haven't met the family or told them who I am yet
06:39That's how I want it
06:40I want them to know me for me
06:42Rather than my money
06:43All right, whatever you say sir
06:52Yes, and you are?
06:55Mom, this is my husband
06:57We were just talking about you
06:59Merry Christmas ma'am
07:00I'm Damien
07:00I was hoping it was all a bad dream
07:03But you're really here
07:05My daughter really married a poor salesman
07:09Be respectful
07:10I like him
07:21This is Olsen
07:24You're looking as lovely as ever
07:26Oh, Marcus
07:29What a lovely surprise
07:31I didn't know you'd arrived
07:34Um, what was your name again?
07:38Salesman
07:38Oh, Damien
07:39Yes, Damien
07:40You should be honored
07:42This is Marcus Walton
07:44Heir to the Walton group
07:46And the only man worthy of marrying my daughter
07:49So
07:54You chose to marry
07:57This
07:58Iris
08:00How
08:02Bizarre
08:02Bizarre
08:03Bizarre
08:04Yes
08:06What can I say?
08:07My wife Iris has good taste
08:11Don't be rude
08:13Do you know who you're talking to?
08:15This man, the Walton group, makes over a million dollars a month
08:22You could probably never earn that much in an entire year
08:27You'd be surprised
08:28I'm sorry, Damien, this isn't
08:30Don't bother, Mrs. Olsen
08:32There's no point in trying to explain anything to someone like him
08:37You're right, Marcus
08:39Let's not waste our thoughts on such negative things
08:42It's Christmas
08:43It's Christmas
08:45It's Christmas
08:48I'm sorry
08:49Marcus is the douchebag my parents want me to marry
08:52They only care about being rich and they hate people who aren't
08:56That's why my mom's being rude to you
08:58They have no idea what being rich means
09:03Damien, are you upset?
09:04Please, you're not gonna back out of this, right?
09:06Oh, no, no, no
09:08I'm all in
09:09When I make a promise, I plan to keep it
09:13I'd never screw you like that
09:15I mean
09:15I mean, unless you consented first
09:21If we get through this day with my family, I'll consent to anything
09:26And I'll even throw in an extra grand for putting up with my family
09:32Well, I'm looking forward to it, but Iris, I really don't need your money
09:37I'm good
09:38Iris, did you know Marcus is working on a deal with Harvey Lambert?
09:45No, Mom, I didn't
09:47Because I don't even know who Mr. Lambert is
09:49Harvey Lambert
09:51He's only the second command
09:54The world's largest defense contractor
09:58Atlas
09:59And with Mr. Lambert's support, we're going to take the Walden Group worldwide
10:07And, uh, quadruple our profits
10:11Oh, you see, Iris, Marcus is very impressive
10:14He's a mover and a shaker
10:17He's the kind of man you should marry
10:20Not this salesman who could probably never get an appointment with someone as powerful as Harvey Lambert
10:27I didn't realize Harvey was such a big deal to people outside the military
10:31Harvey?
10:32In this house, we show respect
10:36And you are not on a first-name basis with a man like
10:40Oh, but I am
10:42Harvey's an old friend
10:48An old friend
10:51That's not possible
10:52Marcus, he's just a salesman
10:54He's just making stuff up so he doesn't look bad in front of Iris
11:00On the contrary
11:02I feel bad for you, Iris
11:04Not only is your husband unsuccessful
11:08He's a compulsive liar
11:10Shame
11:11But don't worry, darling
11:12If he's strapped for cash, I can hook him up
11:14I'm fine
11:16Thank you
11:18Oh, it's Christmas time
11:21I could hook you up with a, uh
11:23Big boy job
11:26You can clean toilets at my company
11:28If you're lucky, he might just catch a glimpse of, uh
11:32Your old friend as he's leaving the bathroom
11:36Marcus, stop it
11:38I don't care that Damien is poor
11:40He's much more of a man than you'll ever be
11:42And I won't let you insult him like this
11:47Thanks, babe
11:48Look
11:49Don't worry
11:51They've got me all wrong
11:53I actually, uh
12:02Father is discussing business with Mr. Lambert
12:06What a perfect way to prove that you're a liar
12:11Dad?
12:11What?
12:13Mr. Lambert wants me to be there in person?
12:16I'll leave right away
12:18Mr. Lambert isn't there yet, but uh, he'd like me to join
12:21I'll just, uh, confirm with your old friend Harvey
12:27That he's never met you before
12:28You little liar
12:30Can't wait
12:32And when you're ready to apologize
12:35You know where to find me
12:36You'll be apologizing to me
12:41All right, well, Mrs. Olsen, Iris, I'm afraid I have to chat, but I have a business to conduct
12:49Don't worry, I'll be back with your Christmas gifts
12:58Iris, how could you have been so rude to Marcus? And Damien, you liar
13:04Mom, stop it
13:06We're gonna be late for Christmas at Grandpa's, let's just go
13:16Merry Christmas, Amanda
13:17Merry Christmas, cousin
13:19I am so glad you did not bring that pathetic
13:24Merry Christmas
13:30Merry Christmas, family
13:32Who's this, Rando?
13:33You must be Tom
13:35Hi, I'm Damien
13:36Iris' husband
13:41So you're the broke salesman who married Iris without even bothering to meet the family first?
13:46Oh, he doesn't care about Iris
13:48He just married her for our money
13:50Listen guy
13:52We all have a stake in this family business
13:54You can't just waltz in here with Iris and steal it from us
13:57I told you, Iris darling, bringing this freeloader home was a mistake
14:02Enough
14:03It's Christmas
14:04If you all can't be decent, my husband and I are gonna have to leave
14:08Iris, don't be like that, we're just joking
14:11You're the guest of honor tonight
14:13You can't leave
14:14Come on, come on
14:22I'm sorry Damien
14:24My family's business is in trouble
14:26And they were counting on Marcus to save us by marrying me off to him first
14:30It's nothing personal
14:31They just see you as standing in front of their money
14:34It's amusing actually
14:35They're so against me, but they don't know anything about me
14:39I know everything I need to know about you
14:43Unlike the men they want me to be with, you're a good guy
14:47You're doing great
14:48This is the best few grand I've ever spent
14:50Well, I'm just keeping my promise
14:52And I really don't need your money
14:56I'm having a really good time with you
14:58You're special
15:00And I feel bad
15:02In a rush to get married, we never consummated our relationship
15:06But maybe later tonight we can
15:12Monty Iris
15:14Uh, who's that?
15:16Hi Leslie
15:17This is my new husband Damien
15:19Damien, this is my niece Leslie
15:21Merry Christmas, Uncle Damien
15:23Merry Christmas, kiddo
15:25I didn't know you had a niece
15:26I went and brought her a gift
15:28Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
15:31Uncle Damien, my money home's empty
15:33Can you give me some money to fill it up for Christmas?
15:36Oh honey
15:38You're asking the wrong man
15:40He's just a broke small town loser
15:42He doesn't have any cash for you
15:44Do you Damien?
15:45Leslie, Damien can't afford it
15:48Daddy, what's a broke loser?
15:50Oh, it's just someone who's stupid and lazy and doesn't have enough to eat
15:56Sounds sad, right?
15:58Oh no, I'm really sorry, Uncle Damien
16:00I shouldn't have asked
16:02Tom
16:03Leslie, your dad is joking
16:05But maybe instead of something that costs money
16:08Uncle Damien could take you somewhere
16:10Now Leslie, I'd love to fill your money gun
16:12But I don't have any cash on me
16:14But if you take this to the bank, they'll fill it up for you
16:17Oh, Damien
16:19You know the bank won't bother cashing a check that's worth less than the paper that it's printed on
16:23$50,000
16:2550 grand
Recommended
1:59:57
|
Up next
13:43
2:38:47
1:25:45
13:59
13:28
9:56
10:22
13:36
8:22
8:33
12:17
11:01
19:06
17:18
16:05
8:00
12:01
11:04
12:47
17:49
17:56
13:36
8:56
Be the first to comment