- 6 hours ago
Jimmy Kimmel Live - Season 24 Episode 34 -
George Clooney, Mike Tyson, Christopher Cross
George Clooney, Mike Tyson, Christopher Cross
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00:00Tonight's guests, George Clooney, Mike Tyson, and music from Christopher Frost with Cleto and the Cletones.
00:11And now, here's Jimmy!
00:30Hi, I'm Jimmy. I'm the most thankful person. Thank you for joining us from our holy, beautiful downtown Hollywood.
00:40And welcome to 80s Week. You know, this is, I was thinking about 2025 and how much it sucks.
00:46And I thought it might be nice to hop into the DeLorean and go back in time to a better place, the 80s, to an era when every song had a sax solo and we all had giant socks with no feet to keep our legs warm.
00:58In the 80s, no one ever had cold legs. Right, Guillermo?
01:02You look great. What is that thing you're holding? What would you call that?
01:25I'm not sure what it's called, but they say it's good for your arms.
01:28It's good for your arms.
01:29Yeah.
01:30Well, it's really working, then. The tab and tequilas are paying off in a big way.
01:34That's right.
01:35That's right.
01:36Tonight, we are kicking off 80s Week with Dr. Doug Ross from ER is here.
01:41George Clooney.
01:43Iron Mike Tyson is with us.
01:44And we've got music all along the night from Christopher Cross, everybody.
01:50Welcome, Christopher.
01:53I am going for the, I don't know if you noticed, the mid-80s Johnny Carson look.
01:57I even have some topical 80s jokes like Johnny.
02:00So we wrote some jokes based on things that happened, like, this week in the 80s.
02:04So in theaters this week, in 1980, The Empire Strikes Back was at the movie.
02:11Wild, wild stuff.
02:14A couple of years if you haven't seen it, but turns out Luke's father is Darth Vader.
02:19Even scarier, his mother is Joan Rivers.
02:23On this day, in 1982, the Surgeon General, C. Everett Koop, released a warning stating that video games could be hazardous to your health.
02:34And he's right.
02:34I played Donkey Kong for six hours yesterday.
02:37Then I went out on my lawn.
02:38I threw a barrel at an Italian.
02:40On November 10th, 1985, the number one show on TV was The Cosby Show on NBC, starring Bill Cosby as an OB-GYN, a fact that I predict will age very well.
02:57And on November 10th, 1983, under Ronald Reagan, they shut down the government.
03:02It lasted for three full days.
03:05Can you imagine the government being shut down for three days?
03:11Here in the present, we are on day 41 of the Trump government shutdown.
03:15Democrats refused to sign on to a bill that would force millions of Americans off their health care and make it much more expensive for those who can afford health care.
03:24So Democrats drew a line in the sand.
03:27They said, we are not going over this.
03:28And today, after 41 days, they pulled out a shovel and a bucket and they ate all that sand and got nothing for it.
03:36Isn't that great?
03:37You know what they got?
03:38They got a promise for Republicans in the Senate to hold a vote on health care sometime in the future.
03:43And if there's one thing we know about Trump and his merry band of sycophants, it's that their word is as good as gold.
03:50I mean, it is incredible at his age that Chuck Schumer is still able to bend over so far.
03:56Chuck Schumer is basically every parent who tells their kid, no more iPad, that's it.
04:02Next thing you know, he's playing Roblox at the dinner table.
04:05This was such a big cave by the Democrats, Bruce Wayne offered to buy it.
04:11Dick Durbin, the Democrat, told Senate Majority Leader John Thune that he was, quote, counting on him to keep his word on this agreement.
04:18He said he assured me he would, which is exactly what Lucy said to Charlie Brown with the football.
04:24So now the House will vote and we'll see how that goes.
04:28Turns out all Trump had to do was threaten to starve poor people and he got his way.
04:33I'm sure he'll never do it again, though.
04:35Speaker Mike Johnson praised the bill, which is kind of all you need to know.
04:38Well, he said he's glad Democrats are finally ready to do what the American people have been asking them to do for weeks.
04:44Great. And then maybe you'll finally be ready to do what the American people have been asking you to do for months and release the Epstein files.
04:50We've got to get something out of this.
04:59Meanwhile, with all this going on, Trump is he posted up a storm on Truth Social this week,
05:06and he covered a range of topics from Biden and his auto pen to photos of his new ballroom.
05:13He bragged about getting the key to the city of Miami.
05:16He raged about the price of beef.
05:18He plugged his son Eric's book.
05:19He bashed Nancy Pelosi.
05:21He complained about voter ID.
05:22And we learned he's trying to get the NFL to name a stadium after him.
05:27Trump reportedly wants the Washington commanders to give him naming rights to their new stadium.
05:32Why would anyone ever want to name anything after a Don?
05:36I mean, look at Don Jr.
05:38It's not exactly a winning strategy.
05:42But he's a big football guy.
05:47Joe Montanning bad made an appearance at the commanders game yesterday,
05:50where he received a decidedly negative reception from the crowd.
05:54Please welcome the 45th and 47th president of the United States,
06:00Donald Trump, and secretary of court, Pete Hayes,
06:05as the president's chairman and vice president of our United States military.
06:15It's like a whole stadium full of Melanias.
06:18You think he can hear the boos, or does the narcissism force field block it all out?
06:30And then Trump, who, one of the fun underrated things about him is how little he knows about anything.
06:36Like, this is a guy who helped start the USFL.
06:38He owned a football team.
06:39And yet, anyone who knows anything about football can immediately tell he knows nothing about football.
06:46How many touchdowns did you have back then?
06:48Six, seven?
06:50I'm not sure I had any.
06:52I would have liked him as a quarterback.
06:54You definitely would have had, like, six, seven touchdowns there?
06:58He puts it in your hands.
06:59Now, you see some of the guys with the, you know, the powerful arms, and they throw it so hard.
07:05Tom Brady told me once, he said that, you know, you've got to put it in their hands.
07:09You've got to help them out a little bit.
07:10Yeah, that's incredible insight, isn't it?
07:12It turns out the quarterback, you know the guy with the powerful arms, the quarterback,
07:17has to put the ball in his teammates' hands.
07:19You've got to help them out a little bit.
07:20The announcer was too busy trying to force six, seven in there to notice.
07:24And then, like a 79-year-old man who's going to know six, seven, and that team photo,
07:31let's have a look at that team photo again, because there he is, number 85, in the military academy.
07:36This is about four years before those terrible bone spurs sprouted up
07:39and prevented him from serving his country in Vietnam.
07:42We probably would have won that if he was able to fight.
07:45Before he arrived, Trump had his plane fly over the stadium,
07:51dazzling fans with what some are calling the greatest flyover ever.
07:57I just want to say, was that the greatest flyover ever?
08:01Nobody's ever done a flyover like that.
08:03That's right.
08:04No one ever has done a, it was the greatest flyover and the greatest combover ever.
08:10Sadly, that was the only flight into D.C. that wasn't canceled yesterday.
08:16More than 2,200 flights were canceled because of this stupid shutdown.
08:20His transportation secretary, Sean Duffy, said that before Thanksgiving,
08:25air travel could be reduced to a trickle,
08:27which is the same reason Trump's doctors put him on flow mats.
08:32Today, Trump lashed out at air traffic controllers who stayed home because they aren't getting paid.
08:37He wrote,
08:37We would also like to extend that offer to you, Mr. President.
08:56We are not too thrilled with you either.
09:05Trump's negative job rating is at 63% right now.
09:08This is reportedly the line for the food bank at the Nellis Air Force Base in Las Vegas.
09:14There was a big spike in military families having to line up to get food, which is completely insane.
09:21The same was true for our men and women overseas.
09:23The Army even posted and then unposted a list on their website of food banks in Germany
09:28where Americans working on our base there could get assistance,
09:32all because our politicians are busy measuring each other's Wienerschnitzels.
09:37It's not just the military he's trying to starve out.
09:39Trump is also doing his best to cut off SNAP benefits for civilians.
09:43I think I figured out why Trump hates SNAP so much.
09:46I think it's because his fingers are too small to do it.
09:52Trump is, maybe if they change the name.
09:56We, in order to combat this, we set up a big, beautiful food bank in our parking lot.
10:02So we've been collecting donations on behalf of two great organizations,
10:08St. Joseph Center and the L.A. Food Bank.
10:11We collected a lot of food already.
10:13We're going to keep doing this until they get their act together.
10:15So go to our Instagram page, Jimmy Kimmel Live.
10:18You can see what is needed there.
10:19We take donations from 9 to 5.
10:21Or if you prefer to give money, you can do it at stjosephcenter.org or lafoodbank.org.
10:26Thank you for all the money people that have come by and donated.
10:31You may remember he promised the lower grocery prices on day one.
10:37And, of course, he hasn't.
10:38But he is focused on other more important stuff like magnets.
10:42Magnets.
10:43If China refused to give magnets, because they have a monopoly on magnets, because they were allowed to happen over a 32-year period,
10:52there wouldn't be a car made in the entire world.
10:55There wouldn't be a radio.
10:56There wouldn't be a television.
10:57There wouldn't be internet.
10:58There wouldn't be anything, because magnets are such a part.
11:01Now, nobody knows what magnets are.
11:03They don't?
11:08No.
11:09I could have sworn I've seen them all over my mother's refrigerator.
11:12I must be mistaken.
11:15Nobody knows what they are.
11:16Trump pulled a fast one in the middle of the night last night.
11:19He gave get-out-of-jail-free cards to all his cronies who were mixed up in the fake elector scheme.
11:24He pardoned 77 people last night, including Rudy Giuliani, Sidney Powell, the entire staff of the Four Seasons Total Landscaping, and the dildo shop next door.
11:34They announced the pardons in the middle of the night, because, you know, if they do this during the daylight, Rudy's skin bursts into flames.
11:42But Rudy Giuliani, they say he hasn't been this happy since he almost got the third base with Borat's daughter.
11:48The White House Press Secretary, Carolyn Levitt, said these great Americans were persecuted and put through hell by the Biden administration for challenging an election, which is the cornerstone of democracy, which is why they pardoned them in the middle of the night.
12:05There's no such thing as shame anymore.
12:07Remember those PSAs in the 80s that would tell you not to use drugs or stay in school?
12:12Great, Cameron, you remember the one we did?
12:13Yeah, I do.
12:14Do you remember what it was about?
12:15About pornography.
12:18That's right.
12:19Yeah.
12:19And since we are celebrating 80s week, we dug it up, and we thought you might want to have a look.
12:24Hi, I'm Jimmy Kimmel.
12:26I came Reno on My Baby is a Robot.
12:28And I'm Guillermo from the Miami Sound Machine.
12:32We believe that children are our future.
12:34Kids are so incorporated.
12:36Word, G.
12:37But sometimes, even the raddest kids get exposed to things that are grody to the max.
12:42Like, boom.
12:43That's right.
12:43Kids and nudie magazines don't mix.
12:46You have magazines?
12:47I do.
12:48I've got magazines you should never look at.
12:51Magazines like Playboy.
12:53Penhouse.
12:54Gent.
12:56Shockers.
12:58Banana pants.
12:59Cute and booze.
13:01Oi.
13:02Yocks.
13:03And penis time.
13:10Oh, sometimes it's tempting to look at naked ladies, but you have to say, no.
13:15Adult material is for adults.
13:18Let's keep it that way.
13:19And if we do, one day in the future, by the year 2025, kids will have no way to access pornography at all.
13:26What are you doing?
13:30I should ask you the same question, mister.
13:33Where'd you get all these magazines?
13:35Here, granted.
13:35No Atari for two weeks.
13:37That's right.
13:38Dad.
13:39The guy from My Baby is a Robot is in my room.
13:42Don't call you, dad.
13:42You want to see the dance?
13:44Get the stuff, Guillermo.
13:46The robot.
13:48Bye.
13:48Oh, and don't forget, kids.
13:51A clean brain is a healthy brain.
13:54This message brought to you by McGrady of Phonelm.
13:57Take a bite out of porn.
14:02All right, we got a great show tonight.
14:04Mike Tyson is here.
14:05We're moving some fifth of the cross.
14:07And we'll be right back with George Clooney.
14:09Hey, welcome.
14:39Matt tonight, one of the great fighters of all time.
14:42He has a new one-man show called Return of the Mic.
14:44Mike Tyson is with us tonight.
14:47And then later, a five-time Grammy Award winner.
14:50You can see him riding like the wind live on tour this spring,
14:53sitting in with the Cletones.
14:55Christopher Cross is here.
14:59Last time you were here, you did Ride Like the Wind with Ron Burgundy.
15:05Will Ferrell was here.
15:06That was an amazing thing.
15:07Wonderful.
15:07Big thrill, yeah.
15:08That was fun.
15:09Really fun.
15:09What are you going to do tonight?
15:10What song?
15:11Do Sailing for you.
15:12Oh, Sailing for you.
15:12Oh, my God.
15:13All right.
15:14So, thank you.
15:15Christopher Cross is here.
15:16This week, we're bringing the 80s back with totally radical guests,
15:21including Danny DeVito, Jason Bateman, Mr. T, Debbie Gibson,
15:25Morgan Fairchild will be here.
15:26We'll have music from Susanna Hoffs, Howard Jones, and Men at Work.
15:30And tomorrow night, the one and only Eddie Murphy will join us.
15:32So, please join us for that.
15:35Our first guest tonight made his television sitcom debut on The Facts of Life back in September
15:41of 1985.
15:43And he's done pretty good since then.
15:44He stars alongside Adam Sandler in Noel Baumbach's Jay Kelly.
15:48It opens the theaters November 14th and on Netflix December 5th.
15:52Please welcome George Clooney.
16:19How are you?
16:21Christopher Cross is here, man.
16:23Christopher Cross.
16:24I'm such a fan.
16:25Ever seen Christopher Cross live in concert?
16:27I have not.
16:27But, you know, growing up in Kentucky, we started with Sailing, I think, was your first big one.
16:32He's going to do that tonight.
16:34And then you sang the theme to Arthur, which was amazing.
16:38Yeah.
16:38It's pretty fun.
16:39Pretty exciting.
16:39The moment in New York City.
16:40Think of Laura.
16:41Yes.
16:42Yeah, we could go on and on, Christopher.
16:44Yeah.
16:45Go ahead.
16:45Is it weird for you to think of a young George Clooney singing along in his car to your songs?
16:51George is still young.
16:52Come on.
16:52That's right.
16:56You know, I always liked Christopher Cross.
17:00Maybe he'll write a song about you.
17:02What kind of car were you driving?
17:04A 76 Monte Carlo.
17:06Oh, wow.
17:07Wow.
17:08You know, it had rust all over and it said, danger car on the back of it.
17:12In space tape.
17:13Remember space tape?
17:14Yeah.
17:15You guys don't remember.
17:16Danger car.
17:17It might as well say, pull me over.
17:19I know.
17:20By the way, I did that to Pitt once.
17:22I got a bumper sticker on the back of his car in the shape of a pot plant.
17:28And I put, you know, you don't ever look at the back of your car.
17:31And I put it on the back of his car and on it, it said, excuse my language, cops.
17:39Guaranteed to get pulled over.
17:40There's no way you don't get pulled over with that bumper sticker on the back of your car.
17:45On the back of his Prius.
17:46Yeah, I enjoyed it.
17:56People, I would imagine, often ask, why am I friends with you?
17:59I know.
18:00Yes, most people.
18:02What year did you move to L.A.?
18:04You said you drove out here.
18:0582.
18:0682.
18:06Yeah.
18:06And when you came out here, was it like right away you started working?
18:10No, God, no.
18:11It was like, you know, I think it was 84, 85 before I started getting work.
18:16The first job I did was a movie.
18:20This is an insane story.
18:21But I did a movie with an actress that I'm working with in this movie, Laura Dern, 40 years ago.
18:26She was 15.
18:28And, yeah.
18:29And that movie was called?
18:31It was called Grizzly to the Predator.
18:33I get eaten by a bear.
18:36And we were shooting it in Budapest.
18:39It was Charlie Sheen, Laura Dern, and I.
18:40We get killed in the first scene.
18:43But it was a cheap, low-budget film, and they ran out of money.
18:46We got stuck in Budapest.
18:48And this is communist, you know, Iron Curtain Budapest for, like, two months.
18:52They just left you there?
18:53We just hung out.
18:55Eating, like, paprika chicken every day.
18:58Waiting for them to fly you home?
19:00Somebody to give us some money to go home.
19:02I'm serious.
19:03And would you be surprised to know we have a clip from that film?
19:08Yeah.
19:09Did that...
19:10Oh.
19:14When's the last time you saw even a little bit of Grizzly 2, the Predator?
19:20Well, it never came out.
19:21Oh, it didn't?
19:21It was never released.
19:22And then suddenly, some knucklehead about two years ago got a bunch of stock footage and
19:27put it together and made us all the star of the movie now and released it.
19:31And then I got a lot of crappy reviews, which I, you know...
19:3440 years later.
19:35Well, let's see if there weren't it.
19:37It's not true.
19:39Turn on noise.
19:45Land.
19:45Not funny.
19:48Ah!
19:55So, we messed up.
19:56Were you super psyched when you got that part?
19:59I was so excited.
20:00It was my first job.
20:01I was really excited.
20:01And that's how you met Laura?
20:02I met Laura there.
20:03And Charlie there, yeah.
20:04And Charlie was there.
20:06Yeah.
20:06And Charlie...
20:07Was there an actual bear on set or no?
20:09No.
20:09There was, like, a guy with a bear paw that he would do with...
20:12You know.
20:14I mean, it was a disaster.
20:15You, um...
20:16I don't think we could talk about the 80s without mentioning your appearance on The Facts
20:20of Life.
20:21Yes, I had to.
20:22You've got...
20:23Now, look at that hair.
20:28A carpenter, right?
20:29Oh, yeah.
20:32That's a mullet, dude.
20:34You know, some prop guy handed me a hammer.
20:37You know that, right?
20:38Here's a hammer.
20:39Of course.
20:39They're like, okay, you're a carpenter, so here's a hammer.
20:42Yeah.
20:42Hold the hammer.
20:43And look at me.
20:44Look how willing I am to hold a hammer.
20:46Yeah, because you probably want to hit him on the head with it, right?
20:49At that point in your life, somebody hands you a hammer for a headshot, and you're like,
20:53okay, I'm going to take the thing.
20:55And here you are with your co-stars from Facts of Life.
20:57Oh, yeah.
20:58The girls.
20:58I know.
21:00You know what?
21:01You notice Nancy and I have the exact same haircut.
21:04You do.
21:05Look at that.
21:05Blair's got the...
21:06Yeah, you've all got the same...
21:08Lisa has the same haircut.
21:09Mindy's pretty close, too.
21:10It's like there was one hair place in the 80s, and everyone...
21:13Everyone went to it, you know?
21:16Did you have a mullet?
21:17No, I did not have a mullet.
21:18No, no, no.
21:20Did you...
21:20Yeah, would you call that a mullet?
21:22I don't know.
21:22I had a mullet.
21:22Well, that's the early stages.
21:24Later, it got longer in the back and shorter on the side.
21:26As you do.
21:27Who gave you the mullet?
21:29I don't know.
21:30It was my fault.
21:30Your parents took you to the...
21:32My parents weren't taking me to the barber.
21:34They didn't?
21:35This was an adult mullet you had.
21:36This was, like, three years ago.
21:40Hey, I do want to say that my wife and I went to see you in Good Night and Good Luck on Broadway,
21:45and, man, was that just absolutely great.
21:48And now that is on Amazon on Prime Video, right?
21:52Yeah, it's on Prime Video, yeah.
21:52People can watch it.
21:53We did a live version of it.
21:54How many shows did you do?
21:55Like, 103, I think, altogether.
21:58103?
21:58Okay.
21:58That's a lot.
21:59That is a lot of shows.
22:01As you get older, it gets harder to remember your lines.
22:03Does it, even if you've done it 50 times, you then have a problem remembering the lines?
22:07Yeah, and it gets harder to remember your lines.
22:11No, it's...
22:12I mean, you do really start to forget crap, you know what I mean?
22:15Terrible.
22:16Uh, schmuck.
22:16Okay.
22:17All right.
22:17Well, you sent me up for that.
22:18Mike Tyson's back.
22:19Hey, Mike Tyson is back.
22:20Have you met Mike Tyson before?
22:22I haven't met Mike Tyson before.
22:23I haven't.
22:24I'm going to meet him when I walk out of here.
22:25I want to say...
22:26You know, I...
22:26The only person I've ever met of that...
22:30In that profession, I was in Milan about...
22:3325 years ago, maybe longer, and I was at a nightclub, and there was a guy in, like,
22:37a purple suit, purple tie, really handsome, kind of strong, stocky guy, and he keeps like,
22:43George, man, and he keeps punching me in the chest, you know?
22:46Right.
22:46I'm like, dude, what are you doing?
22:48And he's like, hey, man, hey, man, and he's punching me in the chest.
22:51I finally, I grab him by the face.
22:53I go, dude, if you hit me one more time, I'm going to knock your f***ing clock off.
22:57Right?
22:57And he's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
23:00And he's laughing.
23:01Next morning, I wake up, my buddy goes, you were pretty drunk last night.
23:04And I was like, yeah, I wasn't drunk at all.
23:07What are you talking about?
23:07He goes, you grab, you know, marvelous Marvin Hagler by the face?
23:12Oh, my God.
23:13Yeah.
23:14I mean, I'm lucky to be here right now.
23:17You're looking at my face?
23:19Look at me.
23:19George Clooney, his movie star, J.C.
23:22Do you have any regrets?
23:29What's your name?
23:30Phoebe.
23:31You're a tough one, Phoebe.
23:34I'll see you all in Tuscany.
23:40Everything's so nice.
23:46People are so nice.
23:47By the way, who's the best peanuts I've ever had to try my own?
23:49It's a good peanut, a European peanut.
23:51I didn't offer you one because I know about your allergy.
23:53That's right.
23:54My throat will close and I will die.
23:56How can I play people when I don't see people?
23:59Touch people?
24:00Don't touch people.
24:02That is George Clooney.
24:04And Pete Clooney with Laura Dern and Adam Sandler.
24:08What a great movie this is.
24:09And you guys are all really great.
24:11Were you surprised Adam Sandler is so good in this movie?
24:14You know, Adam's a really good actor.
24:15I agree.
24:16And he was really wonderful in the film.
24:18And we had a blast doing it.
24:20And like, as you see, Laura and I have been working together for nearly 40 years.
24:23Yeah.
24:25I mean, I thought you'd been killed by that bear.
24:28I didn't realize that you survived.
24:29There's still time.
24:30Did you play basketball with Adam?
24:32I played a lot of basketball with him over the, over the, over, like, I think about 30 years ago
24:36when I was on Saturday Night Live, we started playing.
24:38Oh, you started then?
24:40Yeah, yeah, yeah.
24:40So we haven't played in a while.
24:41Wow.
24:42Wow.
24:42Yeah, yeah, yeah.
24:42Who's better?
24:43That's a good question.
24:44Since, don't tell anyone.
24:46Uh-huh.
24:48I'm so much better.
24:51No, he's got a, you know, I've gotten older and I've stopped, I just shoot from the outside.
24:55Oh, you do?
24:55Anyway, I saw you playing basketball.
24:57Terrible.
24:58Against Ted Cruz.
24:58Yeah, yeah, yeah.
24:59I played, I played with you one time.
25:02Yes, you did.
25:03Yeah.
25:03At my home.
25:04Yeah, no, basketball's not my sport.
25:06Yeah, I can tell that.
25:07I don't, is there, is there a sport?
25:10Um, you know, I'm, I'm okay at baseball.
25:14I bet.
25:15Yeah.
25:15Okay.
25:15Do we have, do we happen to have that clip on?
25:18Is there the clip?
25:19Handy?
25:19Now, there's a clip that I like to have handy at all times.
25:22Yes, a baseball clip.
25:22And here's Jimmy.
25:23Oh, yeah, we have a little bit handy.
25:24Oh, there it is.
25:26Wow.
25:27Oh, wow, look at that.
25:28Whoa.
25:29Whoa.
25:30Whoa.
25:32Whoa.
25:36Since you brought it up, you know, I thought I.
25:38Yes, it's amazing that that clip was waiting.
25:40Is it always skewed up?
25:42Honestly, I don't think we've showed it for two years,
25:44but I'm real happy it's there, I have to say.
25:47Somebody back there's got quick fingers.
25:49Your character, Jay Kelly, gets honored in the movie.
25:52Yeah.
25:52At this film festival.
25:54And it's, I won't give away what, what goes on, but.
25:57Everyone dies in the end.
25:58But you're sitting in the theater.
26:01Yeah.
26:01And you're watching this montage.
26:04Tribute.
26:04It's tribute of films about your life, which I'm sure you've probably done in real life
26:08before.
26:08Yeah, maybe so.
26:09Yeah, from a time or two.
26:10Yeah.
26:10So, and it's kind of crazy to, like, look at that.
26:14I think there are, how many, like, 15, 20 movies?
26:15Well, they're using clips from actual films I was in.
26:18Yeah.
26:18I'm playing a character who's an actor, and it's, I mean, it freaked me out, man.
26:23And all of a sudden there's, you know, again, as you can see, a lot of bad haircuts that
26:27I had to get through.
26:28Yeah.
26:28It started from the early 80s.
26:29But an amazing body of work.
26:32Do you help pick those, or do you leave that to the director?
26:34No, I didn't even know he was going to use them.
26:35Oh, you didn't?
26:36No, I thought he was going to do some CGI thing and make me look young or something.
26:40Which I wouldn't mind.
26:41He didn't have to, because your whole life has been recorded.
26:46I know.
26:46I can't hide from it.
26:47That's really an unbelievable thing.
26:48You know, I think a lot of people make a lot out of, oh, this character, because what
26:53Noah said, that he wrote this specifically for you, and he wouldn't make the movie if
26:58you'd said no.
27:00Yeah, I kind of doubt that.
27:01You doubt that.
27:01I think I was the cheapest one available.
27:04It goes to, like, Tom Cruise, and it's like, nah, I'm not going to do that.
27:07Uh-huh.
27:09Yeah, I'm just very lucky to get to work with a director.
27:11Is that a lot of pressure, though, when a guy says, like, hey, listen, I've written
27:15this movie, and it's written for you, and you've got to be the star, and then what if
27:19you want to say no?
27:21Well, no, it's not a lot of pressure.
27:22I mean, I would be, I was excited to get a part like that.
27:25You know, when you're my age, you know, I'm 64.
27:28You know, the thing is, like, okay, now here's what happens.
27:33You get to a certain age, they applaud you and say you're right.
27:36Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's like, thank goodness.
27:37Oh, he's still gumming his bread.
27:39Wow.
27:40What a thing.
27:42He's still with us, God bless him.
27:45Look at him, he walked in the chair by himself.
27:47Oh, oh.
27:49I'm telling you, when I was 20, and I heard somebody died at 64, I go, that's a good run.
27:53Yeah, that's a good run.
27:55That's a good run.
27:56The Beatles wrote a song about it, for God's sake.
28:00Well, it's great to have you here.
28:01You too.
28:01Congratulations on the movie.
28:02It's called Jay Kelly.
28:03It opens in select years, November 14th.
28:05And then you can watch it at home on Netflix starting December 5th.
28:09George Clooney, everybody.
28:10We'll be back with Mike Tyson.
28:12Once in your life, you find her.
28:25Someone who turns your heart around.
28:28Next thing you know, you're closing down the town.
28:33And then you can watch it with you.
28:38You can play with me.
28:40Next, in November 1986, our next guest became the youngest ever heavyweight champion of the world.
28:54You can hear about that and much, much more in his new one-man show, Return of the Mic.
28:59Please welcome Mike Tyson.
29:20How are you?
29:21How are you doing?
29:22Mike, did you think you'd still be around after the 80s you had?
29:26No, no, no.
29:29The 90s was pretty tricky, too.
29:35You haven't been here since, a week before you fought Jake Paul on Netflix.
29:39Yes.
29:40And I just want to say something to you.
29:41Tell me.
29:42Because I don't know if you remember this, but during the commercial break, you and I had a little chat.
29:46And I said, hey, are you really, are you going to win?
29:48Are you, like, real serious about this? Because I'm going to bet a lot of money.
29:52And you're like, yes, I am going to win.
29:54Well, I bet money, too.
29:56You did?
29:56And I bet more money than I've ever bet on anything before.
30:01Oh, me, too.
30:02You did?
30:03Yeah.
30:04You bet on yourself, huh?
30:05Yeah.
30:06Who'd you bet with, in Vegas?
30:07Excuse me?
30:08No.
30:08No.
30:09You did it on an app?
30:10Yeah.
30:10Yeah, right.
30:11Yeah, you can't walk up to the cage and go, although, if I saw you walk up to the cage and bet on yourself, I'd be like, get all our money, everybody.
30:18He's betting.
30:19He's betting on himself.
30:21Yeah.
30:23That fight didn't go as well as I was hoping it would.
30:28I know.
30:28Neither.
30:29What about me?
30:32Both of us, really.
30:33But there was a highlight of the fight.
30:35I think we have, actually, it was a pre-fight situation.
30:38Vicious win.
30:39Vicious win.
30:39Thank you, Doug.
30:41Love you.
30:41Love you, too.
30:44And we all got to see you there.
30:45Yeah.
30:54Hey, listen.
30:56That's pretty customary.
30:58It's just that they happen to take advantage of that situation.
31:01All fighters walk around like that in their locker room.
31:04That's how it is.
31:05You walk around with a jockstrap on.
31:07No, it's a cup.
31:08Oh, a cup.
31:09Yeah, it looks like chaps, but it's a cup.
31:12Okay.
31:13And that, um, and you don't, but you don't wear socks.
31:15You do wear a cup.
31:16You do not wear socks.
31:17No socks.
31:17No socks.
31:18Never wear socks.
31:19No, ever.
31:20Why no socks?
31:21This drives me crazy.
31:22I'll be honest.
31:22I only used it for fighting where that was my image.
31:27It's just real hardcore.
31:28No socks.
31:29And then I, I, by somehow I discovered the, I had a very, um, disintegrating dose of foot
31:38fungus.
31:39And, um, it was really bad.
31:42It's still bad now.
31:43I got it fixed.
31:44You know, I did your, I mean, come on, I'm serious, man.
31:47So would you say that foot fungus is your greatest opponent of all the, well, I would have to say
31:53so, because it's still kicking my ass now.
31:56You should make a great commercial for Guessin' X.
32:00Guessin' X.
32:00Guessin' X can't help me.
32:02Guessin' X can't help me.
32:03Guessin' X cannot help me.
32:05At, um, 40 years ago.
32:06I told them that they blew up, huh?
32:08In March of 1985, you had your first professional fight.
32:11Yes, I did.
32:12You remember who you fought?
32:14Hector Mercedes.
32:15Hector Mercedes.
32:16I'll forget the name, but.
32:17You, um, you, he put up a good fight for the part of one round that he fought you before
32:24you knocked him down, and he decided not to get up.
32:27Well, I was only 18.
32:28I was just learning to do this stuff.
32:30Were you scared at that time?
32:32To death.
32:32You were?
32:33Yeah.
32:34How scared were you?
32:35Like, did you think about backing out?
32:37100%.
32:37I'm probably the most scariest guy when it comes to, you know, fighting.
32:42Like, yeah, last night I did my show for the first time in five years.
32:45You know, I was sweating like I was in a spelling bee, man.
32:50We had a spelling bee here once, yeah.
32:52Oh, that's right.
32:55Remember my spelling bee here?
32:57I had, did I pass?
32:58Did I pass?
32:59Yeah, we had the kids and everything, right?
33:01Oh, the kids spelled better than me?
33:04They spelled better than both of us, yeah, yeah.
33:07Yeah, they were champions, though.
33:08You know, they're champion kids.
33:09I mean, it would be, but believe me, in the ring, you could have crushed those kids.
33:14Thank God.
33:14You're not even close.
33:15Thanks, God.
33:16You didn't form this at all.
33:18Okay, so we did a little bit of math, and you fought 15 times that first year.
33:24Yes, I did.
33:25Why so many fights?
33:27Good experience.
33:28Experience.
33:29You averaged two minutes and 37 seconds per fight.
33:34That's how your opponents averaged, two minutes and 37 seconds per fight.
33:38They got paid quick.
33:40They did.
33:41They got paid quick.
33:42No overtime.
33:43No overtime.
33:43Did you start to feel invincible at that point, just mowing through these guys?
33:50Well, that's what fighting's prepared to make you feel that way.
33:55It does.
33:56Yeah, and then life humbles you.
33:57Yeah, I don't think it made all those guys you fought feel that way.
34:02I think life humbled them pretty good.
34:05But then you fought Trevor Burbick.
34:08You beat Trevor Burbick to win the heavyweight title.
34:11Yes, I did.
34:12You wore the belt in two rounds, right?
34:14Yes.
34:14Just under two rounds.
34:16And then you got this belt.
34:18And you, like, unlike a lot of people who would put the belt in a frame or something like
34:22that, you wore the belt around.
34:25Absolutely.
34:26I used to dream about that when I was, like, 14 years old.
34:29I'm watching a guy wear the belt.
34:30I used to dream about being the champ, having that belt on my waist.
34:33So you'd go to, like, whatever, the dentist or the mall, and you had the belt on.
34:39A hundred percent.
34:42And at this time, you'd become so popular.
34:47And, I mean, I remember, like, I remember when you were fighting how excited I was to
34:53watch you just come out and lay waste.
34:56I don't, I mean, I felt, it felt like I was the one doing it in some ways, though I was
35:01most certainly not.
35:02I played the clarinet.
35:03What celebs did you hang out with in that time, or you just, you, and you became this
35:10sensation?
35:11Who were you, like, hanging with?
35:13Michael Anthony Hall, Eddie Murphy, Rick James.
35:18Anthony Michael Hall, that seems like an odd duo.
35:21No, um, I don't know how old these people are, but do you remember Anthony Michael Hall
35:26with John Dean?
35:27Listen, now listen, I was a young kid, 19 years old, young guy, just starting to get
35:33around the world of celebrities.
35:34And this little guy comes out the limousine, comes in, sits at the table of the restaurant,
35:40he buys everybody food, has a credit card.
35:43I never saw a credit card in my life, I'm 18, 19 years old.
35:46He's a little white guy, skinny guy, he got everybody falling, he's like the king, hey, credit card.
35:53I'm like, this little guy right here.
35:55Yeah.
35:56He got the credit card, he's by himself, everybody's falling like the pie, pie, pie.
36:00He looks like me, yeah, yeah.
36:01Yeah, but he, yeah, he wasn't you, trust me.
36:03No, no, no.
36:04So he had a lot of swagger.
36:07Oh, man, you couldn't believe this.
36:08And then you just...
36:09He's at the fight, everybody's falling, little kid, he's a kid, he can't, he's not old enough
36:14to probably go in the fights alone.
36:16He's a big kid.
36:18Did you watch his movies?
36:19Yeah, I watched his movies, all the John Hughes movies.
36:22Oh, you do, you love the John Hughes movies.
36:26I'm an 80s guy, man.
36:28An 80s kid.
36:28Come on, am I 80s?
36:29So you went and saw 16 Candles and The Breakfast Club?
36:32Oh, yes, all that stuff.
36:33And Weird Science.
36:34And Weird Science, right?
36:39This, um, I'm excited you're doing this show because I, you know, I could, I could interview
36:44you honestly until, like, the end of the year nonstop, really.
36:48And this idea that you're sharing these stories with people, you might, you have enough stories
36:53to fill many, many, many one-man shows.
36:56Exactly.
36:57Because this one is just totally another direction than the last one.
37:01The show is going to be on Netflix, the show that you're doing, right?
37:04Yes, yes.
37:04Oh, that's fun.
37:05All right, that's fantastic.
37:07Well, it's great to see you.
37:08It's always great to see you.
37:09Yeah, it's always a pleasure.
37:10Mr. Mike Tyson, everybody, you're listening live from the stories on the Mike Tyson's Return
37:17of the Mic.
37:17Tickets are on sale now.
37:19We'll be back with Christopher Cross.
37:21Oh, that is a nice start to 80s week.
37:36You can see him on tour starting this spring.
37:39Here with the classic sailing, Christopher Cross.
37:43Well, it's not far down the paradise, at least it's not for me.
37:56And if the wind is right, you can sail away and find tranquility.
38:02Oh, the canvas can do miracles.
38:06Just you wait and see, believe me.
38:12Oh, the canvas can do miracles.
38:32Just you wait and see, believe me.
38:38Oh, the canvas can do miracles.
39:08It's the same.
39:08Oh, the canvas can do miracles.
39:10It's the same, it's the same, it's the same.
39:12It's the same, it's the same, it's the same.
39:14It's the same.
39:15It's the same thing.
39:20I'm caught up in the reverie, every word is simply, but you believe me.
39:28Oh, the canvas can do miracles.
39:33Slearing takes me away, to where I've always heard it could be, just a dream of the way I carry, but soon I will be free.
40:03Slearing takes me away, to where I've always heard it could be, just a dream of the way I carry.
40:33At least it's not for me, and if the wind is right, you'll set away, and find serenity.
40:42Oh, the canvas can do miracles, just you wait and see, can you believe it?
40:51Slearing takes me away, to where I've always heard it could be, just a dream of the way I carry me, just a dream of the way I carry me, just a dream of the way I carry me.
41:11Soon I will be free.
41:41...
41:42...
41:43...
41:45...
41:49...
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