- 2 days ago
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00:00Here are Robert Young and Jane Wyatt with Ellen O'Donohue, Billy Gray, and Lauren Chapin in Father Knows Bed.
00:30Are you going to work all night?
00:49No, I'm bothered.
00:51You plan to give up sleeping altogether?
00:53No, I'm finished.
00:55I want you to listen to the story and tell me if it's too miserable to hand in.
00:58Oh, I'm sure it's fine.
01:00Oh, wait, Father, you have to listen.
01:02For that piece of your weird story, I can't tell whether it's good or awful.
01:06Now, you come on and sit down.
01:08This will only take six or seven hours.
01:10Well, wouldn't tomorrow be soon enough?
01:12No, I'll have it in tomorrow morning.
01:14I warn you, this might scare you.
01:17You see, you're in the story.
01:19I'm in it?
01:19Yes, and you get into a pretty weird situation.
01:23This is a poor night to be getting into weird situations.
01:27Couldn't we wait until...
01:28I couldn't.
01:28Just be quiet and listen.
01:31It seemed like just another ordinary afternoon as my brother Bud...
01:34Bud in it, too?
01:35Oh, yes, we're all in it.
01:37Oh, you see, here's the idea.
01:38Our teacher told us to take an old classic theme, think of a variation on it,
01:42and tell it in everyday terms, just as though it were happening to our own family.
01:45I see.
01:46So I took Faust, the story of a man who made a bargain with the devil.
01:49Uh-oh.
01:50I think I'll leave right now.
01:51Oh, sit down.
01:53You're trapped, just as you are in the story.
01:55It seemed like just another ordinary afternoon as my brother Bud carried the trash out to the incinerator.
02:03He emptied the wastebasket in the usual fashion.
02:07But then something happened that puzzled him.
02:09Each time he tried to strike a match, a breeze sprang up to blow it out.
02:12Then, startled by a pleasant chuckling, he turned and saw an unfamiliar gentleman standing nearby.
02:23Rather pesky breeze, what, lad?
02:25Here, let me show you an old East Indian trick.
02:33Hey, how'd you do that?
02:34You wouldn't ask a man to give away all his secrets, would you?
02:38Besides, I want to talk to you about something more important, Bud.
02:41How'd you know my name?
02:42Your little sister Kathy told me.
02:44She said I might find you back here.
02:45I understand your mother isn't home right now.
02:48Oh, perhaps you're the chap I want to talk to anyway.
02:50Is there some place where we might be more comfortable?
02:53Yeah, there's some chairs in the patio.
03:08My name's Harry Beeple.
03:10And I'm going to make it possible for your family to own the most amazing set of books ever run through a printing press.
03:16Is that what you're selling?
03:17Is that what you're selling?
03:18Books?
03:19Books.
03:19We've got books.
03:20Not like these.
03:21Let me tell you a secret, Bud.
03:23These volumes can give you the keys to the world.
03:27See, that's the title of the set.
03:28Keys to the world in ten compact, profusely illustrated, exciting volumes.
03:33Lad, you realize that these little books can open any door for you, unlock any of your dreams.
03:38They can lay the riches of the world at your feet.
03:42Now, our English teacher keeps giving us that same guff.
03:44But so far, books haven't unlocked any doors for me.
03:47They just keep me locked up studying.
03:50You're a hard one to sell, you know.
03:52Extraordinary sales resistance.
03:53I admire you.
03:54But now, here's my trump card.
03:57This set will not cost you one penny.
04:01It's free?
04:02Free.
04:03No kidding?
04:03No kidding.
04:04All my company wants is permission to use the Andersons as a recommendation.
04:08We put a set in your home, then we point you out to your neighbors and say,
04:12The Andersons have signed up with us.
04:14Why don't you?
04:15Well, that sounds like a pretty good deal.
04:17It's an extraordinarily good deal.
04:19How come you picked us out?
04:21Oh, it's quite elementary.
04:22Respectable family.
04:24Good insurance business.
04:25Mother of PTA member.
04:27One daughter in college.
04:28A boy in high school.
04:29A daughter in grammar school.
04:30And a frog named Austin in a box in the backyard.
04:35How'd you know so much about us?
04:37I make it my business to know.
04:39I shall need a signature.
04:41It should be your parents, but yours will do for now.
04:43I'll get theirs later.
04:44Bottom line there, bud.
04:45How soon do we get the books?
04:47Oh, very soon.
04:48Once we land a customer, my company goes right to work.
04:51Thank you, bud.
04:52Remember now, use the books.
04:55Use them.
04:56Oh, wait.
05:01About that firetruck.
05:03How do you do it?
05:04Do you hold a couple of matches in your hand or something?
05:06Still curious, eh?
05:07No, no, no.
05:08No, all I do is to reach around your neck in a perfectly normal fashion.
05:13As they say, lad.
05:17You ain't seen nothing yet.
05:21Au revoir.
05:26So, Mr. Beale departed.
05:28That evening, when my parents found out what kind of a deal Bud had signed up for,
05:32they were somewhat upset.
05:34Why?
05:35Why should he be upset over that?
05:37You'd think they'd be happy I made such a good deal on the books.
05:40Look, who's writing this story?
05:42You or me?
05:43You shouldn't be listening anyway.
05:44You should be up in bed.
05:45Yeah, okay.
05:46I just want to find out some more about Mr. Beale.
05:48Say, do I learn how he did that fire trick?
05:50You'll find out.
05:52My father was particularly upset over Bud ordering a set of books,
05:55even though they were free.
05:57Don't you night owls ever give up?
05:58Shh, now, don't interrupt.
05:59This is a story.
06:00You better come in and sit down and listen.
06:01This is pretty interesting.
06:02Oh, is this the story you're doing for school?
06:04See, where was I?
06:05Hang on.
06:06Even though they were free,
06:07Father tried to explain to Bud
06:09that somehow, someway,
06:11you always have to pay.
06:14Then he gave orders
06:15that the books should be sent back unopened.
06:17However, Kathy did not know this,
06:19and when the books arrived,
06:21she quickly tore open the box.
06:23Hey, Mommy, look at the books!
06:25Look at the pretty books we got!
06:27Oh, dear, you're not supposed to open that.
06:29Your father wants to send those back.
06:30But why?
06:31They have such pretty pictures in them.
06:33Well, I...
06:34Oh, they aren't attractive.
06:37Hey, are those the great books?
06:38Bud's folly.
06:39I thought we weren't supposed to open them.
06:41Well, we would.
06:41But Kathy, there's no one.
06:42Hey, Bud, look at the pretty new books we got!
06:44Yeah, they come already?
06:45Let me see.
06:47Hey, they're pretty good.
06:49What do we have here?
06:50The ladies knitting and reading circle?
06:52What's that free cellar order, Dad?
06:53Not bad, huh?
06:54I've never seen so many colorful illustrations.
06:57Here, I thought we were going to send these back.
06:58But why, Dad?
06:59They're free.
07:00Oh, Bud, nothing is free.
07:02There's bound to be a hook in this deal somewhere.
07:04You know, these are odd books.
07:05Uh, certainly not like any encyclopedias I've ever seen.
07:08Well, Mr. Beale said they were different.
07:10He said they could unlock all your dreams, lay the riches of the world at your feet.
07:14You're right.
07:14They are odd.
07:16They look more like catalogs than books of knowledge.
07:19Catalogs of things that people desire but never can have.
07:25And probably would be better off without.
07:27Boy, there's something I wish I had.
07:30Boy, isn't that a beautiful bicycle?
07:34Oh, I wish I had one like that.
07:37Well, wishing won't get it for you.
07:38You start earning money toward it.
07:40That's how you get things in this world.
07:41You earn them.
07:42Wishing would be a lot easier.
07:44Well, let's put these books back before we damage them.
07:46And tomorrow, I'll take them down to the express office.
07:48Well, why send them back, Dad?
07:50I say we've got holes in our heads if we turn down a gift towards you staring you in the mouth.
07:53Look, Bud, in the first place, when a stranger comes along and offers you something for nothing, watch out.
08:01Hi, Mary Ellen.
08:03Hello, Kathy.
08:04Say, I wonder if you'd do me a big favor.
08:06Come on outside.
08:06I want to show you something.
08:08Okay.
08:08Okay, but it seems silly to send the books back.
08:11Mr. Beale said that if we use these books, they can lay the riches of the world.
08:15I don't care what Mr. Beale said.
08:17Daddy, Mommy, look at what I got.
08:21Where did you get that?
08:22From Mary Ellen.
08:24She's going with her family to Europe, and she wants me to keep her by for it until she gets back.
08:28I told you wishing was a lot easier than earning.
08:43Well, we were pretty amazed when we realized the bicycle was exactly like the one in the book.
08:48What color was it?
08:49We knew it was merely a coincidence.
08:51And yet we couldn't help wondering.
08:56Bud jokingly pointed to a picture of a fine-looking sports car in one of the books and made a wish for it.
09:02He didn't actually believe...
09:02I'll tell you what kind I want.
09:03It's one of those French...
09:04He didn't actually believe that he would get such a car, but several times we caught him looking out in the driveway, just in case one might turn up.
09:15But none did.
09:16And the next morning he resigned himself to driving his old jalopy to school.
09:20On the way, he came upon a man whose car had a flat tire.
09:27Then he stopped to help him.
09:28Having troubles?
09:33Yes, tire trouble, and I don't have a spare.
09:35What's it worth to you to drive me to the airport?
09:37Well, I can't now.
09:38I'd be late for school.
09:39You can name your own price.
09:40I can't afford to miss my plane.
09:41Well, I'd like to, but...
09:43All right, then let me borrow your car.
09:45I've got to get out there right away.
09:47Well, borrow it?
09:47Oh, well, I might not ever get it back.
09:50I'll leave mine for security.
09:51It's worth more than this old wreck.
09:53Well, why don't you just call the garage and get yours fixed?
09:55I don't have time.
09:57Don't you understand anything?
09:59I have to get to that plane or I'll...
10:01I'll trade cars with you.
10:05Trade? You mean even up?
10:06Yes.
10:07Yes, even up.
10:08Here are the keys.
10:09Hurry up, boy.
10:10Get out, please.
10:11Get out.
10:25Exactly like the one in the book.
10:36So Bud had his car.
10:39Exactly like the one in that strange set of books.
10:42None of us believed in magic,
10:44but yet this coincidence coming on top of Kathy's bicycle
10:48made us wonder if the keys to the world volumes had any connection.
10:52In fact, this was all we thought about.
10:56All we talked about.
10:58Now, wait.
10:59Look, we have to be sensible about this.
11:02We're all intelligent enough to know that a book,
11:05a mere book, couldn't work miracles.
11:08You can't just look at a picture of something
11:10and wish for it and there it is.
11:13Dad, that's exactly what happened.
11:15Twice.
11:16Those were just coincidences.
11:18But were they?
11:19Let's put the books to a test and find out for sure.
11:21Let's see.
11:22Where's the M volume?
11:24I want to look at a picture of some mink stoles.
11:26Oh, I saw some real pretty ones.
11:28No, Betty, don't do it.
11:29Mother, there's nothing to be so alarmed about.
11:32Maybe not, but I just don't like this whole deal.
11:35I want these books out of the house as fast as possible.
11:38But why, Mother?
11:40I don't know.
11:41They...
11:42Well, there's just something not right about them.
11:45I can feel it.
11:47This is something we shouldn't be fooling around with.
11:49Jim, is the express office open this evening?
11:52Yes, it is, and that's exactly where I'm going to take these.
11:55Bud, get some string to tie up this box.
11:57Gee, Dad, can't we keep them?
11:58No.
11:59Now, wait.
12:01Father said we had to be sensible about this, and he's right.
12:03But I don't think we are being sensible.
12:06Let's say, now, just for argument's sake,
12:08let's say that these books could give us anything we wanted.
12:11Now, wouldn't it be pretty stupid to throw that away?
12:14Well, I tell you, there's just...
12:16Oh, now, wait, Mother.
12:17No, they give me the creeps.
12:18Well, what would be the harm in getting a few things we've always wanted?
12:21Yeah.
12:22What's the harm in it, Father?
12:24We could keep our heads, just wish for little things?
12:27Yeah, like, say, a little swimming pool.
12:29There, you see, right away it's swimming pools.
12:32Father, Bud was just kidding.
12:34Was I?
12:35We could wish for useful things, things we really need.
12:38Mother, think how much easier ironing would be if you had a nice mangle.
12:42Oh, pooh, I don't need a mangle.
12:46But it would save time, and it could put that time to some good use.
12:49Is that so wrong?
12:52Betty, there's just something about this that I don't like.
12:55I saw something in one of these books for you.
12:57Oh, now, hold on, look, I don't want to get mixed up.
12:58Oh, it's something you've always talked about owning,
12:59but I just know you never buy it for yourself.
13:03Isn't this the kind of boat you'd like for fishing?
13:05Yes, but...
13:06Say, that is a trim-looking little craft.
13:08Yeah, it's got a good outboard, Dad.
13:10And what would be the harm in having that? It's good and healthy.
13:13Yeah, I'm with you, sis.
13:14That's a good trailer, too. Makes the boat easy to launch.
13:16Jim, now, don't you...
13:19Oh, honey, don't worry. I couldn't afford it.
13:21Afford it? All you have to do is wish for it.
13:24Oh, Bud, that's ridiculous.
13:26Now, how do we know what it is if we don't try?
13:28Don't forget the bike and the car.
13:30Mommy, I scared my knee.
13:32Oh, you certainly did. How'd you do that?
13:36I fell off my bike.
13:37There, you see? That bicycle caused this.
13:41I sensed something like this was going to happen.
13:43It's an omen.
13:45Mother, kids have been falling off bikes for years and years.
13:48Yes, but if this is such a wonderful, charmed bicycle,
13:51things like this shouldn't happen.
13:53Come on, let's go put something on that knee.
13:55It wasn't the bikes, Bo.
13:57Now I'm convinced those books must go back.
14:00Right tonight.
14:01But it's silly.
14:01No, she's right. Get some string, Bud.
14:03But, Dad...
14:04Get some string.
14:05The books are going back.
14:13What did you say was in the box? Books?
14:16Yes, books.
14:17And they're being sent to, uh...
14:19Keys to the World Company.
14:24What's the matter?
14:25Nothing, nothing.
14:27Why did you look so funny when you heard the name of the company?
14:30Oh, it's just that, uh...
14:32That what?
14:34I don't know.
14:36But there's something strange about this outfit.
14:39You were not the first who tried to return one of these sets.
14:42What do you mean, tried to return them?
14:43Don't you guarantee delivery?
14:45Oh, sure, sure.
14:46But, uh...
14:47Well, I wish you luck.
14:49I wish you luck.
15:13Oh, sir.
15:14Oh, give me a pen to
15:15My dear Mr. Anderson, you cannot return these books because your family has already used them.
15:41Your obedient servant, Mr. Peale.
15:45My dear Mr. Peale.
16:15I suggest you relax, Mr. Anderson.
16:23You know, you can't get rid of those books
16:24because, well, in a word, you're stuck with them.
16:28Who are you?
16:29That's right.
16:30We haven't met for any.
16:32My name's Harry Beale.
16:33Beale, the book salesman.
16:36Right you are.
16:38Ten compact, profusely illustrated, exciting volumes.
16:42What infernal kind of books are these anyway?
16:45Then who are you?
16:47I'm your friend, if you'd only realize it, old boy.
16:50What kind of a friend?
16:52The only kind, the kind that has your best interests at heart.
16:56Now, for example, let's take that trim little boat you were discussing.
17:00How do you know about that?
17:02Does that matter?
17:03The important thing is, you can have that boat.
17:07How?
17:07Like Kathy got her bicycle?
17:10I arranged that rather well, didn't I?
17:12Bud's sports car was more difficult, but I managed.
17:14But now, with this boat, you and I could have some perfectly rip-roaring times.
17:20Now, I can take you to a lake where rainbow trout this large...
17:23Mr. Beale!
17:24I don't want that boat.
17:25And I'm not going fishing with you.
17:28What do you want with us?
17:29And who are you?
17:32Oh, come now.
17:33You know me?
17:38Everyone knows me.
17:40Only not many are willing to admit it.
17:47Now, let's get down to business.
17:49Oh, no.
17:51We don't do business with you.
17:52You will.
17:53No!
17:54I'll take your infernal books and get out!
17:57I can't let go of it.
17:59Of course not.
18:00I told you they belong to you now.
18:02You see, you've already made the first two payments on them.
18:05Payments?
18:05I haven't paid you anything.
18:07Oh, but you have.
18:08There are five.
18:09You can put the books down now.
18:11There are five payments on that set.
18:14I already have two of them.
18:15One named Kathy, one named Bud.
18:17No!
18:18No!
18:19Yes, and I practically have a third, Miss Betty.
18:23Isn't this a lovely mink?
18:24She...
18:25She doesn't want that.
18:29Oh, doesn't she?
18:30No.
18:30Look, you can't have them.
18:32They're just children.
18:33They didn't know what they were getting into.
18:35Ignorance is no excuse.
18:36It's also one of my most useful weapons.
18:38Now, you wouldn't want to deprive me of that.
18:40You can't have my children.
18:42It's a bit late to discuss that, old boy, because I already had them.
18:44And quite a bargain, too, for the niggling price of a bicycle and a sports car.
18:49Oh, Miss Mechanical Age.
18:51Beale, I don't care what you say.
18:53Naturally.
18:54Now, I wonder if you'd mind waking the children.
18:56You see, I have to take them with me to meet the boss.
18:58The boss?
18:59Yes.
18:59He'll want to put them right to work recruiting other followers.
19:02Yes, I haven't got much time.
19:04I have to get my quota in by midnight or be fired.
19:07And when I say fired, I mean just then.
19:09Oh, they can make it hot for a chap.
19:11Now, let's go with them.
19:12Bite George Beale!
19:13No, it's not George Beale, it's Harry Beale.
19:15I don't care what it is!
19:17You're not taking my children anywhere.
19:19Well, then, what can you offer me as a substitute?
19:21Your wife?
19:22No!
19:23Now, that's good, because we don't want her.
19:25She'd just make trouble for us.
19:27Oh, we know her type, dreadful person.
19:28No, that doesn't...
19:30Now, now, now, no offense, old man.
19:33But you must admit she has some very unfortunate faults,
19:36such as loyalty, devotion, honesty.
19:39But come on, I can't wait any longer.
19:40I must have that payment.
19:41Let's go and wait for children.
19:42Wait.
19:42I'll make you a bargain.
19:47You asked me what I could offer as a substitute.
19:51Well, take me.
19:54You?
19:54Oh, now, do you think that's a fair bargain?
19:57One old, tattered soul for three young ones
20:00with a lifetime to work ahead of them.
20:02That's my deal.
20:03I'll go with you now, forever,
20:05if you leave them alone.
20:07Are you sure you know what you're letting yourself into?
20:09That doesn't matter.
20:11But you can't have them.
20:13All right.
20:14I haven't much time to bicker.
20:16The bargain's made.
20:18But hurry.
20:18Run up and back.
20:19And don't wake them that troublemaker of yours.
20:23Boy, what a spot you put me in.
20:36Did you have to do that?
20:37You should have gone and kept and slugged in, Daddy.
20:39Come on, keep going.
20:40Does Dad ever get out of this?
20:40Well, if Mr. B. Lover did come to this house,
20:42I'd take a broom to...
20:43Oh, now, be quiet and let me finish this.
20:45It was nearing midnight
20:47when Mother was awakened by a noise in the bedroom.
20:51She sat up, turned on the light,
20:54and was surprised to see Father packing.
20:57Jim, what are you doing?
20:59It's nothing, dear.
21:00Go back to sleep.
21:02Nothing?
21:02I'm awake in the night to find my husband packing,
21:05and he says it's nothing.
21:07Now, you put those things back.
21:08No, honey.
21:09I have to go.
21:11It's a business trip.
21:12Business?
21:13In the middle of...
21:14Well, that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
21:17Now, you go put your pajamas on.
21:19Honey, you just don't understand.
21:20I have to go.
21:23Go where?
21:24Why?
21:25Why, it doesn't make sense.
21:27All these miserable books.
21:29I was so upset.
21:29We don't know what we're doing.
21:31Now, you go to bed.
21:32You'll feel better in the morning.
21:35Come, come, old boy.
21:36Don't let a buffalo you.
21:37Time's running out.
21:38Don't let her see you.
21:39No one can see me or hear me now but you.
21:42Tell her you have to leave on government work.
21:46But that's a lie.
21:47I've never lied to her.
21:48So what?
21:49You're one of us now.
21:51I can't.
21:57Shall I take the children?
21:58No.
21:59Dear, please put on your pajamas.
22:01Don't just stand there muttering to yourself.
22:03Honey, this trip, it's for the government.
22:08Government?
22:09FBI.
22:10The FBI.
22:12FBI?
22:14Jim, you're out of your mind.
22:18Honey, don't laugh.
22:20I wasn't supposed to tell you I was working for them.
22:22Good.
22:22I can't even tell you where they're sending me.
22:25Excellent.
22:27Jim, is this true?
22:32What's all a racket?
22:33I can't get any sleep around here.
22:36Bud, go back to bed.
22:37What's going on here?
22:39You children go back to bed.
22:40What's a suitcase for?
22:41Who's going away?
22:42I am.
22:43Now you kids.
22:44Can we go along?
22:45No, definitely not.
22:47Jim, I don't like the feel of this.
22:50If you're going somewhere, I'm going too.
22:52I'm your wife.
22:53And where you go, I go, no matter what.
22:56You see, she's undermining me with that blasted loyalty.
22:59So we're going too.
23:00No, none of you are going.
23:02Well, I'm not going to let you put one foot outside this house
23:05because I know you're not telling the truth.
23:09She goes with that woman's intuition.
23:11You're right, honey.
23:12I can't tell you the truth.
23:13Maybe someday you'll understand.
23:15But I want the truth now.
23:17Oh, that miserable honesty.
23:20Honey, if I don't go, something awful will happen.
23:23But then we'll face it together.
23:26The only thing that matters is, oh, I love you.
23:30Love, that does it.
23:38Dreadful wench.
23:39Gosh, how could that limb break?
23:42The wind's not blowing at all.
23:43I'll tell you how it happened.
23:45Your mother did it.
23:47Me?
23:48Yes, you.
23:49And those wonderful, beautiful faults of yours.
23:55But what a woman.
23:58If I'd had one like her to love me when I was alive,
24:01I wouldn't be in this racket now.
24:03And Mr. Beal hobbled off into the shadows
24:13and was never seen around our house again.
24:16The end.
24:19What do you think?
24:21Well, I think it's just wonderful, Betty.
24:23It's just great.
24:24It's okay.
24:25I suppose now I'll have to go out and saw off that broken limb.
24:28Oh, yes.
24:30How did you ever come to write such a story?
24:33Well, you know something?
24:34I didn't really write it.
24:35You two did.
24:36We did?
24:37All I did was just put down what I know you two are doing
24:40in a spot like this.
24:41Well, I don't know about both characters,
24:44but you certainly got the heroine right.
24:46I think we'll keep you on a while longer.
25:16I think we'll keep you on a while longer.
25:34I think we'll keep you on the spot.
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