Helping Elders Feel Useful (Without Making Them Work)  Emotional Support for Aging Parents - video Dailymotion

Helping Elders Feel Useful (Without Making Them Work)  Emotional Support for Aging Parents

Transcript

00:00I just want to feel like I matter. For many elders, this quiet wish lingers beneath the

00:05surface. It isn't about being kept busy or given more chores. It's about feeling needed,

00:12valued, and respected. As families, our challenge isn't to fill their time, but to fill their

00:18hearts with purpose. So how do we help elders feel truly useful without simply handing them

00:24a list of tasks? As we age, our bodies may slow down, but our desire to contribute doesn't fade.

00:32Deep inside, everyone wants to know they have a role, a place where they belong, and a reason

00:38they're still important. For elders, the unspoken questions often become, do I still have a role

00:44here? And am I just being looked after or am I being looked up to? When elders feel pushed aside,

00:52even if it's unintentional, it can chip away at their self-worth. The result? Emotional withdrawal,

00:59a sense of isolation, even depression. The need to feel needed is a fundamental human drive.

01:06It doesn't retire, even when we do. Often families try to help by assigning simple jobs.

01:12Can you water the plants? Could you fold the towels? These tasks are well-intentioned,

01:18meant to involve elders in daily life. But here's the truth. Feeling useful isn't about staying

01:24productive. It's about feeling significant. The difference is subtle, but powerful. Instead of

01:31saying, help me with this, try shifting the focus to meaning. Say, you're the only one I trust to make

01:37this decision. Or, can you give me advice on this? Better yet, your experience could really help us

01:44decide what to do. What you're truly offering isn't another chore. You're giving dignity, respect,

01:51and a sense of belonging. So, how can you put this into action? Here are a few practical ways to ensure

01:58the elders in your life feel valued, without simply handing them more work. First, invite elders to share

02:04stories that can guide important decisions. For example, ask, how did you handle money when times were

02:10tight? This turns them into a living source of wisdom, not just an extra pair of hands. Their

02:17stories become lessons, and their memories become family treasures. Second, involve them in family

02:23traditions or celebrations. Instead of just asking for help, ask them to pass on something meaningful,

02:29like teaching their secret holiday recipe or explaining the origins of a family tradition.

02:34This isn't about the cooking or organizing itself. It's about reclaiming their role as a keeper of

02:41culture and connection. Third, seek their insight, not just their assistance. Instead of asking,

02:47can you help me with this? Moe ask, what do you think I should do? Moe, or how would you handle this

02:55situation? Light. This approach makes them feel emotionally useful, not just physically. Their ideas and

03:02opinions matter just as much as, if not more than, their actions. Ultimately, helping elders feel

03:08useful is never about adding to their to-do list. It's about showing them, in big ways and small,

03:15that who they are still matters. Their wisdom, their experience, and their presence are invaluable.

03:21You're not simply asking for help. You're giving them a reason to shine, to feel seen and heard,

03:27and to know that their life experience continues to make a difference.

03:30Think about the elders in your life. What's something meaningful they've taught you?

03:36Maybe it was a piece of advice during a tough time, or a story that changed the way you see the world.

03:42Cherish those moments, and remember, helping elders feel valued is one of the most powerful

03:48gifts you can give, both to them and to your family as a whole. If you found this helpful,

03:54remember to reflect on your own family bonds, and consider how you can strengthen them with empathy

03:59and understanding. Every generation has something unique to offer. Sometimes,

04:04all it takes is a little invitation to let them shine.