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00:00Hello, I'm Chris Harvick, and welcome back to Web Soup.
00:10There are certain things we've seen on our show
00:12that we would love for you to try at home.
00:14Listen, you got a hot tub?
00:15By all means, flood it with liquid poop.
00:17Have fun.
00:18Feel like eating your weight in microwave pizza rolls?
00:20Hey, they're your bowels.
00:21You obstruct them with whatever you like, right?
00:23But other videos are simply not meant to be emulated.
00:30Figured out how to build a go-kart but realized that constructing an engine for it is just too...thinky?
00:39Well, then, lash it to the back of a pickup truck with a garden hose.
00:43I'm sure nothing whatsoever in the history of time will go wrong with that.
00:46Oh, and by the by, if you attempt this, you will die.
00:50Look at their limp uncontrollable bodies fly through the air!
01:09Because in a go-kart, the entire world is your airbag.
01:13But the Internet doesn't just shock and disappoint in three-minute bursts.
01:20Sometimes, it lets you down more than a drunk dad on Christmas with entire full-length movies.
01:26So, as we all know, the Second Coming is upon us, and Jesus has returned with some kung-fu skills to defeat an army of vampires that can walk in the daylight.
01:40Which is, I can only assume, because the filmmakers couldn't afford a lighting rig.
01:45Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter.
01:51Body of Christ?
01:56Alvin, Avellino, God bless the lake, quickly!
02:11You've just been watching Trinity Broadcast Network Extreme!
02:16By the way, I gotta say, they acted bad twice.
02:19Once when filming, and again when dubbing in the dialogue.
02:22And because, of course, it's web soup, they even got a shot to the disciples.
02:26Yeah!
02:34And when Jesus does return as a vampire hunter, I, for one, am hoping he starts with those mopey emo kids from Twilight.
02:40Yeah!
02:42Take that, Twilight the Vampire. That's his name, right? His name's Twilight?
02:45Yeah, that's what I thought.
02:47The nice people at Break.com sent us a gift basket brimming with gourmet popcorn, chocolate-cover espresso beans, and videos of stupid stunts gone wrong.
02:56We ate all the snacks, but we're sharing the failure!
02:59This clip's so crazy, we had to write the words in bones!
03:09Oh, yeah.
03:11Say, since the rise of the Tony Hawk video game, skateboarding has gotten a bit, I don't know, unrealistic for its own good.
03:17Skaters these days aren't just content with doing a power slide or a handstand on a banana board.
03:22They've got to take things to the next level of stupidity.
03:25I can only assume that's what this guy had in mind when he attempted the formidable double shed shred.
03:31Kids watching, if you like your spine unshattered, maybe don't try this.
03:35Well, that's a white guy getting it wrong for you.
03:47I'm gonna tear the roof in on this place!
03:49What? What? Where are my teeth at?
03:52What? What? Where am I feeling below the waist at?
03:55Full shizzle, my para-lizzle!
03:58If you want to see more videos just like that, then congratulations! You're a sadist!
04:04And you should head on over to Break.com slash WebSoup immediately!
04:07More pain right after this.
04:12When WebSoup returns, get your hate mail writing pen ready for our nastiest thing you can't unsee yet.
04:18No, seriously.
04:24Hi, welcome back to WebSoup. I'm Chris Hardwick.
04:27Someone recently asked me an interesting question.
04:30Chris, they said,
04:32What's your favorite thing about the Internet?
04:34And I answered,
04:35Can you please wait until I'm finished, girlfriend I'm still having sex with?
04:41But then I thought about it, and I think it's got to be probably a toss-up between photos of cats in sinks.
04:47Oh, adorable!
04:49Daddy's gonna have to go to work with stinky teeth because he can't brush them.
04:53And things you can't unsee.
04:55And things you can't unsee.
04:56And things you can't unsee.
05:00We'll see you later.
05:02And we'll see you later!
05:03We'll see you later!
05:04Come on!