00:00Where does one start with something like this?
00:02Oh, yeah, that's good beer.
00:04That's good beer.
00:05How much do we have?
00:06I mean, 10 minutes.
00:07This is a toughie.
00:08That's a long time, isn't it?
00:09No.
00:10Oh, you think it's short?
00:11It's not enough time.
00:12We are the cast of Red One, and we are decorating some very ugly Christmas sweaters.
00:17Ready?
00:18Ready.
00:19We're going.
00:20Let's do it.
00:21Oh, they're already starting.
00:22Are we off?
00:23We're off.
00:24I don't know.
00:25They give us one pair of scissors.
00:26Wait, what do you guys need?
00:27The eyes are not going to pop out.
00:28All right, let's do this as the reads.
00:30Go ahead.
00:31Oh, that's so great, Lucy.
00:32Lucy's coming.
00:33She's got a whole idea happening here.
00:35Eyeballs, nose, beard.
00:39We can actually glue one of the hats right on top of it.
00:42Yeah.
00:43I like it.
00:44Stick up.
00:45What?
00:46I'll be talking.
00:48We might actually sell these things.
00:51I feel great about competing against Chris.
00:55Sure.
00:56Absolutely.
00:57It's great if we win.
00:58If we lose, I'm going on.
00:59We have a very good feeling that we're going to win.
01:01And I think we're doing pretty good.
01:03I think of all the sweaters here that are going to be made, I think this is a sweater
01:06that's going to reflect not only our movie Red One, but going to reflect something that
01:09we have that these guys don't have, which is love.
01:12No artistic ability.
01:13No.
01:14Visual artistic talent.
01:16Can you lower the breasts down a little bit?
01:19Lower the breasts.
01:20Yep.
01:21That's what happened to me.
01:22All right.
01:23How dare you.
01:24How dare you laugh and acknowledge.
01:25Okay.
01:26This is exactly what it feels like to be on Project Runway.
01:28What?
01:29This is the Red One season of Project Runway.
01:31Somebody call Heidi Klum.
01:32Yes.
01:33Yes.
01:34Yeah.
01:35Call her and tell her not to show up because.
01:37Where is Tim Gunn?
01:38We're going to be original.
01:39Tim Gunn.
01:40We got glue gun instead of Tim Gunn.
01:41We got all of it.
01:42Yeah.
01:43The glue gun's already out.
01:44I'm just testing this.
01:45What is this?
01:46It's a hot glue gun.
01:47Uh-huh.
01:48I think.
01:49Oh.
01:50Got it.
01:51There we go.
01:52Okay.
01:53It is hot.
01:54Okay.
01:55It is hot.
01:56Yes.
01:57Okay.
01:58So this is all beard.
01:59So this would be like beard.
02:00The nose.
02:01We need a nose.
02:02You know, here.
02:03Do you want to take something?
02:04Maybe like.
02:05Oh yeah.
02:06Here.
02:07Cut something out of it.
02:08Maybe it's a Santa clown.
02:09I like it.
02:12We're geniuses.
02:13Girls, I am so proud of us.
02:15That's a great kind of thing.
02:16Lucy, you are the Martha Stewart of Christmas sweaters.
02:19Lucy, this isn't going up.
02:20We're the common theater.
02:21I need the Santa head.
02:22Where's the Santa head?
02:23That's right there.
02:24Where's the scissor?
02:25Should we do the eyebrows?
02:26Where's the scissor?
02:27Or is that two letters?
02:28Scissor, scissor.
02:29We're going to burn in hell for corrupting children.
02:31I love our sweaters.
02:32What do we do with the sleeves?
02:34Should we cut them?
02:35I think we should cut them and roll them up.
02:36Can you do this?
02:37I can't shut it.
02:38This was so inspired, Lucy.
02:40Yeah.
02:41Maybe he's got some hair.
02:42Okay.
02:43Now it's yours.
02:44Now we've got to do a mouth.
02:45Can you do some lips?
02:47Like, how do we get some more?
02:49Is this lips?
02:50Is this lipid?
02:51Yeah, that's perfect.
02:52Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:54It's a Picasso.
02:57Meets Pollock.
03:00Abstract Yuletide cheater.
03:03In the film, I have what's called a vambrace.
03:05And the vambrace is a reality adjuster.
03:08You can point it to something, for example, like a little toy car.
03:11And the moment you hit it with the laser, it will make it a reality and make it bigger.
03:16So what I would like to make bigger from my childhood is my Princess Leia action figure.
03:21If I was a kid.
03:22Not now.
03:23Okay, good.
03:24I should stop there.
03:25That's the PG version.
03:26Yeah, please stop.
03:27Yeah.
03:28He knows me well.
03:29Bob the Builder, somebody who can actually do things with their hands.
03:32Mm-hmm.
03:33I think it has some craft creativity.
03:35My He-Man figure.
03:37God, that's funny, because I was going to say I would have taken Battle Cat.
03:41Cringer, remember?
03:42He-Man's tiger.
03:43The green tiger he drove.
03:44Drove.
03:45The tiger he'd drive around town, around Castle Grayskull.
03:49I would do G.I. Joe.
03:51Oh, that's fun.
03:52You know.
03:53I'm single.
03:54I love it.
03:55Or Bob the Builder.
03:56He would do as well.
03:57I love it.
03:58Yeah.
03:59We have a Ken now.
04:00I think Ken and I would fight over clothes.
04:02Fair enough.
04:03Fair enough.
04:04Two more minutes.
04:05Two minutes.
04:06Oh, sick.
04:07You can't rush.
04:08Genius.
04:09Look at this.
04:10Oh.
04:11Two minutes.
04:12Wow.
04:13Wow.
04:14We're going to win, you guys.
04:15We're going to win nothing.
04:16We're going to win.
04:17We're winning nothing.
04:18Yes.
04:19I think it's safe to guess that we're behind.
04:20I think so.
04:21What even is that?
04:23Oh, it's hot glue for the hot glue gun.
04:26Oh.
04:27We've got to reload.
04:28Hot glue gun.
04:29Oh, those aren't stuck.
04:31We should put it.
04:32With glue?
04:33Glue or tape.
04:34You go glue off of them.
04:35All right.
04:36The no prize.
04:37We've got pipe cleaners.
04:38What do you need them for?
04:39Wait, we've got to want them to see the face.
04:41Wait, these are...
04:42Should we do these or anything?
04:43Wait, where's that?
04:44Where's the one?
04:45Oh, that's so cute.
04:46Oh, my God, I love it.
04:48Last minutes.
04:49Don't worry about me here.
04:51She's adding more to this.
04:53Wait, let me use this to...
04:54I want to secure the wreath that's falling.
04:56Excuse me, miss.
04:57Let's do it.
04:58Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
04:59Here, no.
05:00These guys, these guys.
05:01Okay, like little eyebrows.
05:04It says that we have a very chaotic mind and that we have a very obscure view of Santa.
05:12Probably because of some childhood trauma.
05:16Give me some eyebrows.
05:18Okay, okay.
05:19There you go.
05:20That's great.
05:21I think Livarache would love it.
05:23If anybody knows that reference.
05:25It's good.
05:26I think it's good.
05:27I think we're going to get a make it work from Tim Gunn.
05:30Yeah.
05:31From the glue gun.
05:32I like the eyes.
05:33Oh, the scissors.
05:34Oh, I'm glad you're calling them eyes.
05:36Yes.
05:37For the children.
05:38For the children, Bonnie.
05:39I don't know what the I'm doing.
05:42Oh, God.
05:43All right, everyone.
05:44It is time to put your glue guns down.
05:46Oh, man.
05:47We were kind of just riffing at this point.
05:50I feel like we kind of killed it.
05:52Can everyone please hold up their sweaters?
05:54I don't know if ours will sustain that weight.
05:57All right.
05:58All right.
05:59Okay.
06:00I mean, I guess.
06:01With pride.
06:02I mean, I guess.
06:03With pride.
06:04We'll see when I hold that side.
06:05You ready?
06:06Yep.
06:07Oh, my God.
06:08Oh, my God.
06:09Hey.
06:12Wow.
06:13Thank you, guys.
06:14Oh, well done.
06:15Oh, wow.
06:17Wow.
06:18That's really good.
06:19Wait, Dwayne.
06:20Wait, Dwayne, let me see it.
06:22See, we even got the things in there to make it stick up.
06:25Wait, here, let's show them up.
06:27I like it.
06:28Yeah.
06:29Wow.
06:30Third place.
06:31I can't see her.
06:32Literally.
06:33Oh, my gosh.
06:34That's cute.
06:35Not everyone's good at everything.
06:37We all have different talents and, you know, maybe you guys should just stay out of the fashion
06:43light.
06:44But I get it.
06:46I mean, what do we go?
06:47It's, oh, Santa and Cal.
06:49I like that.
06:50Okay.
06:51Oh, that's cute.
06:52Is that what that is?
06:53Santa and Cal.
06:54Okay.
06:55All right.
06:56Okay.
06:57I thought it was Santa Claus, actually, but.
06:58Oh, Santa loves Claus?
07:00What do we got?
07:01We got some eyes out here.
07:03Can I ask what the W is?
07:05That's for the win.
07:06For you?
07:07For the win.
07:08Yes.
07:09Just for the win.
07:10And the P?
07:11Is the P an accident?
07:13The backwards P?
07:14We don't need a P on it.
07:15It's a trademark.
07:17Yeah, exactly.
07:18No, I feel like I'm looking in a mirror.
07:22It's cute.
07:23I think it's very clever.
07:24T more.
07:25It's the essence of T more.
07:26Yeah.
07:27We needed another glue gun.
07:28That's what it was.
07:29The glue gun was the hottest commodity.
07:30I think it's cheeky.
07:31I think it's adorable.
07:32I want to see a hat on a sweater.
07:34That's nice.
07:36That's what we were going for.
07:37That's what we were going for.
07:38Yeah, it's Christmas, but shocking.
07:40Mmm.
07:41Relentlessly, boundlessly talented.
07:44I mean, that's ridiculous.
07:45Yeah.
07:46That's how good it is.
07:47It makes me even more embarrassed.
07:49I know.
07:50Like what we did not.
07:52I know.
07:53Over here.
07:54About Santa loves claws.
07:55Look at this.
07:56The character.
07:57The Christmassy-ness.
07:58And I'm the only one holding this, by the way.
08:00Yeah, I'm not.
08:01J.K.
08:02J.K. has slowly moved further and further away.
08:05J.K.'s exit of the narrative.
08:07Clearly women are a lot better at this than at least we are.
08:11The future is female.
08:12The future is female.
08:13The future is female, everybody.
08:15Happy holidays!
08:17Well done.
08:18Well done.
08:19Beautiful.
08:20Beautiful.
08:21There you go.
08:22A wrap gift.
08:23Yay.
08:24Oh my God.
08:25Can I wear that to the New Yorker?
08:27Yes.
Comments