- 9 months ago
Letterkenny Season 5 Episode 6 Bock et Biche
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TVTranscript
00:00You were sipping suds with your buds the other day.
00:05Hey, Derry, real quick. Blank, lunch, and dinner.
00:09Perfect.
00:10Oh, boy.
00:11Can I be honest with you guys for a sec?
00:13Oh, careful, Derry.
00:14That suggests everything you've said up until now has been a lie.
00:17And you've said lots of things.
00:19It's like when someone starts a sentence with,
00:21don't take this the wrong way.
00:23Guess what? I already did.
00:25Yeah, same thing.
00:26If people start a sentence by saying,
00:27you're going to hate me for saying this,
00:29guess what? I already do.
00:31Or when people start a sentence by saying,
00:33you're not going to want to hear this.
00:35Guess what? I already don't.
00:37No, it's just an observation.
00:39I'm curious as to know why you thought it required a preface.
00:42Well, because I'm aware of how it might sound.
00:45Quit beating around the bush, Derry.
00:47Yeah, Derry, I don't remember you being such around-the-bush beer.
00:50Well, fine. Now I'm not even going to say it.
00:52Say it!
00:53The only thing worse than saying,
00:55you're not going to want to hear this,
00:57is when someone says they have something to say,
00:59and then they don't say it.
01:01You're digging your heels in like a 12-year-old girl.
01:04Wine and doubts? Spits and outs.
01:06Okay, fine. I'm going to say it.
01:08Okay, here it goes.
01:10You know micro-brewing?
01:13Like, craft beer?
01:16Yeah.
01:17I always thought it was craft beard on account of the guys who make it always have beards.
01:26So is all that for just this that I...
01:29Thank you for inviting us into the circle of trust, Derry.
01:32I believe the preferred term is lumbersexuals.
01:35Well, craft beard makes a pocket load more sense.
01:38You know, craft beards doesn't really bother me.
01:41But it's the clever wordplay that goes into the name of them that I find hard to swallow.
01:45Like, so hopping together.
01:48Or, barley breathing.
01:50Now why did you just cause it what it is?
01:52It's fucking beer.
01:53Beer and headlights.
01:54Yeah, I'll contribute.
01:56Ale by comparison.
01:57Stout and about.
01:59Sounds actually pretty good stout and about.
02:01Stout and about's not bad at all, actually.
02:02I drink some stouts and about's.
02:04I'm surprised we're not drinking a stout and about right now.
02:06I think what you want to do is you want to put an animal in the name,
02:09because people love animals.
02:11Like, cute koala cream or happy hamster honey.
02:15No, no.
02:16What you want to do is you want to put a berry in the name,
02:18because people love berries.
02:20Partridgeberry Pilsner or Alderberry Ale.
02:25Pleasing to the ears and the mouth.
02:28No, Derry. Derry, no.
02:30No, Dan.
02:31Dan, Dan, no.
02:32No, Katie, Katie, no.
02:33What you're supposed to do is put something cozy in the name,
02:36because people like being cozy, right?
02:38Like, toque or middens.
02:40And then if you really want to double down on it,
02:42you put something outdoorsy in the name,
02:44because people love being outdoors.
02:46Like, lake or mountains.
02:49Somewhat's really going to boil down to is toque, lake, bruco,
02:53or mountain, middens, alpine ale.
02:57Blanket.
02:58Fire.
02:59Light.
03:00Very good, eh?
03:01The other ways to go is to use a clever but ironical statement,
03:04like, I'm bitters.
03:06See, I go suggestive.
03:09Like, slip it in cider.
03:12Katie.
03:13What?
03:14Let's get this gal of fucking poppers.
03:27Good night.
03:28Good night.
03:29Yeah.
03:30I try to beat you again.
03:34She is playing.
03:35I'm playing.
03:36You take a shot?
03:36I'm playing.
03:37I can't get a shot.
03:38You have a shot.
03:38I can't get a shot.
03:40Gee, you have a shot.
03:41I can't get a shot.
03:42I can't get a shot.
03:43I can't get a shot.
03:44All right.
03:44You have a shot.
03:45Look, boys.
03:47Let's have a shot.
03:57Hey, my friend.
03:58J'espère qu'on n'interrompt pas, life is a highway de Tom Cochrane.
04:10Une Boréale en fait.
04:17On aurait besoin de votre aide.
04:20C'est le Bucking Biche d'Annick.
04:23C'est ça.
04:25On n'a pas ça ici, nous autres.
04:28C'est des traditions anglaises complètement dérangées.
04:31On va t'expliquer plus tard.
04:33Les douchebags de Laval vont venir faire encore de la marde.
04:36Ils viennent toujours cracher dans nos parties.
04:39Numbers?
04:40Le Piscuit Superman?
04:42Oh, I'm going to be sitting with the first team All-Stars as we speak.
04:46Abiento.
04:50Who wants to go to a Bucking Doe in Quebec?
04:52It's Dag Doe, I'll never say no.
04:54Dag and Jill, always a thrill.
04:56Drinking a dance till you shit your pants.
04:58I'd love a good turn and stuff.
04:59I'd love a sip and spin.
05:01What's a sip and spin?
05:03Who the fuck are you?
05:04A sip and spin.
05:05Dag and Doe.
05:06Dag and Jill's.
05:08Drinking a dance.
05:09A turn and stuff.
05:10Or a Bucking Doe.
05:12There's a pre-wedding party thrown by the best man, Maid of Honor,
05:15to raise money for the bride and groom's big day.
05:18Oh, cool.
05:19Get the fuck out of here, dude.
05:27In Winnipeg, they call them socials.
05:29Can confirm.
05:30You know, Winnipeg has a very large Ukrainian population.
05:33Not too many peoples knows that.
05:35Hey, Jewish and Italian too.
05:36Not too many people know that.
05:38Who's gulp and grind is it?
05:40Remember an ick?
05:42Oh.
05:45Well, that's why you gotta strike while the iron's hot, big shooter.
05:48Another French gal that got away.
05:50Okay, catch a break.
05:52Who's driving?
05:54Oh, fuck, not me.
05:55I'm hammered.
05:56Are you there?
05:57Oh, I'm hammered.
05:58And you're there?
05:59Oh, I'm hammered.
06:00I'm hammered.
06:01I'm hammered.
06:02Tyson, you hammered?
06:03I'm hammered.
06:04Did you hammered?
06:05I'm hammered.
06:06Where are you?
06:07And how's that for you?
06:08Well, it's not too bad for me, but right about now, it's not what you want, really.
06:11Well, I'm not missing out on French boys.
06:14Look, I'll drive, but I'm not fitting all you use in my truck.
06:18Pete and repeat.
06:20You guys want to go to a Buck and Dope?
06:22Oh, fuck yeah.
06:23I didn't even know there was a drink and dance tonight.
06:24How do we not know but a swig and sway?
06:26It's not here.
06:27It's in Quebec.
06:28I got no reason to say no.
06:30Let's slam some roomy skin.
06:32Let's get our meat smoked, boys.
06:34Let's fire a little batch of Celine Dijon.
06:36Let's go.
06:37Okay.
06:38Good.
06:39You're driving.
06:41Oh, oh, oh, oh, hold your horses now.
06:47Hold your horses, right?
06:49McMurray, how do you know?
06:51Teen's a bit concerned, eh?
06:53That's bad.
06:54What's the problem, McMurray?
06:55You guys got some French pals that want us English dudes to go to their party in Quebec,
07:01right?
07:02Left.
07:03Right.
07:04Quebec.
07:05Damn near left Canada.
07:06Separatism is alive and well in Quebec right now among the first.
07:09Well, you just had the referendum damn near yesterday.
07:11Hmm?
07:12Yeah.
07:13Well, you just had the referendum damn near yesterday.
07:14Hmm?
07:15Yeah.
07:16Yeah.
07:17Yeah.
07:18Yeah.
07:19Yeah.
07:20Yeah.
07:21Yeah.
07:22Yeah.
07:23Yeah.
07:24Yeah.
07:25Yeah.
07:26Yeah.
07:27Yeah.
07:28Yeah.
07:29Yeah.
07:30Damn near yesterday.
07:31Hmm?
07:32If by yesterday he means a quarter of centuries ago, then yeah, I can backstab.
07:36Oh, you said it feels like...
07:37No, you didn't.
07:38Did too.
07:39No, as you didn't.
07:40Did too.
07:41Did not.
07:42See?
07:43The French is causing separation separatism right here, right now, isn't it?
07:47Settle down, McMurray.
07:49All I'm saying is, if they're not happy to see me, then I ain't pretending to be happy to see them.
07:56You heard it here first.
07:58When a friend asks for help, you help them.
08:00And that's all there is to it.
08:02There you have a scrap.
08:03I have a scrap.
08:04There you have a scrap.
08:04I'd have a scrap.
08:06Tyson have a scrap.
08:06I'd have a scrap.
08:07Phoebe, you have a scrap?
08:08I'd have a scrap.
08:09I don't even know what your fucking names are.
08:11We'd have a scrap.
08:12Mark, boys, let's have a scrap.
08:18Well, I'd have a scrap, too.
08:21My terms are not negotiable.
08:24This is going to be a long drive.
08:28Wait up!
08:29Some matches?
08:42Oh, I don't know.
08:43I don't know.
08:44I don't know.
08:44I don't know.
08:45Hoje, ma vie, c'est la merde.
09:15all queued up in there? What's the scoop? We've got all anus morris set
09:41Who are you?
09:43Excuse me, who are you?
09:47Jean-Guy, and you?
09:49Jean-Pierre, and you?
09:51Jean-Carle, and you?
09:53That's Annie
09:55Enchanté
09:57McMurray
09:59Yeah, I guess that makes me...
10:01Jean McMurray
10:03Enchanté
10:05McMurray
10:07John Wayne, j'imagine? Cowboy
10:09I've been called worse
10:11And John Darrow
10:13John Dan
10:15That's John Squirly Dan
10:17I'm John C. Reilly
10:19I'm John Bones Jonesy
10:21Actually, my middle name's John
10:23Right?
10:25Annick!
10:33Jean-Claude
10:35That's my cousin
10:37Jean Lance
10:39C'est le futur marié
10:41J'ai jamais voulu de Buck & Bish
10:43Personne fait ça au Québec, un Buck & Bish
10:45Buck & Bish
10:47Buck & Do
10:49Buck & Do
10:51He wouldn't let me invite English family to the wedding
10:53So I said we have to have a Buck & Do
10:55So they could be included
10:57Wow! How very charitable of you!
11:01Jean-Claude, c'est ma soeur que tu vas marier
11:03Penses-tu vraiment qu'avec ton salaire de bûcheron tu peux payer nos?
11:07Je suis ton garçon d'honneur, laisse-moi
11:09t'aider
11:11Pis laisse nos amis anglophones nous aider quand les douchebags de Laval vont arriver, ok?
11:13J'haïs les douche de Laval
11:15Moi aussi!
11:17Mon frère
11:19Ah ouais!
11:21Coupe mon en dedans
11:23On va boire un coup
11:25Go!
11:27Coupe mon en dedans
11:29On va boire un coup
11:31Go!
11:33Coupe mon en dedans
11:35On va boire un coup
11:37Go!
11:39Allons-y!
11:45Coupe mon en dedans
11:47Go grab us a pint
11:49I'll get the tickets
11:59Salut monsieur, ça va bien?
12:01Ah oui, ça va bien toi?
12:03Oui merci
12:04Nerf B.A. pour mes amis et moi, s'il vous plaît. Merci.
12:09Ah, tu parles français?
12:11Je veux essayer.
12:13C'est apprécié, hein?
12:15Et un petit extra pour les merrières.
12:19Ouh, un bon gars en plus, hein?
12:22Very good old boy.
12:24Oui.
12:26Euh, t'es pas accompagné, hein?
12:30No girlfriend.
12:31Or quoi?
12:35Ah, non, non, non, non.
12:37Trompe-toi pas, là .
12:38Je pense que tu m'as mal compris, hein?
12:41OK.
12:41Non, non. Moi, mon genre, c'est l'éphane.
12:44OK.
12:46Tu me regardes, tu te dis, un vieux crouton comme ça, là , ça baisse plus.
12:50C'est ben trop vieux, là .
12:52Mais laisse-moi te dire que certains jours, je me lève,
12:57puis je commence à baiser en me réveillant.
12:59Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
13:02Bon.
13:03Ouais, c'est le sang français, ça, mon homme, hein?
13:07Very hot.
13:08OK.
13:09Ouais, ah, ah, ah.
13:10Non, si je t'a demandé ça, c'est parce que,
13:13c'est parce que j'ai une nièce, hein?
13:16My niece, beautiful.
13:19But, uh, pas chanceuse en amour.
13:22Oui, je sais, même chose pour moi.
13:30Non, ben écoute, va t'amuser un petit peu, là ,
13:33puis j'irai te la présenter un peu plus tard, hein?
13:36Merci, monsieur. Enchanté.
13:38Oui, c'est ça. Moi aussi.
13:40Enchanté.
13:40Allons-y.
13:41Donc, Claude, viens prendre un verre avec nos amis.
13:59Bon, je vous gâche que vous avez jamais bu ça.
14:08What is it? Drink it.
14:10Santé.
14:12Santé.
14:20I don't have no piss.
14:22Drive a dart first, maybe.
14:24I might.
14:25Jesus H, that is fucking good.
14:29Santé.
14:30Maple syrup whiskey.
14:32What a parent.
14:33Woo-hoo.
14:34That's good.
14:35Isn't that good?
14:36Good.
14:36Isn't that good?
14:37That's good.
14:38Isn't that good?
14:38Oh, that's good.
14:39Isn't that good?
14:40That's good.
14:40Fuck, boys.
14:42That's good.
14:43Fuck, boys. I'd have another round.
14:45Next round's on us, boys.
14:46Allons-y.
14:47Let's go.
14:50So, what do you guys do for work?
14:52Jean-Pierre, c'est Jean-Coutier.
14:55What's about you, Jean-Girls?
14:58Uh, me, uh, you know, Titi.
15:02Titi Bank.
15:03Huh?
15:04Titi.
15:05Titi Bank.
15:06Titi Bank?
15:08Yeah.
15:09Titi?
15:09Titi Bank.
15:10Titi Bank.
15:11Titi Bank.
15:12Titi Bank.
15:13Huh?
15:14Titi.
15:14Titi Bank.
15:15Huh?
15:16Titi Bank.
15:18Titi Bank.
15:19Titi Bank.
15:20Huh?
15:21Come on.
15:22Titi Bank.
15:23Eh bien, vous connaissez la Titi Bank.
15:26I ought to make sure I'm hearing this right.
15:28Titi?
15:29Bank.
15:30Titi Bank?
15:30Wait, Titi Bank.
15:39I'm not happy.
15:41No?
15:43But it's your bucket niche.
15:45I thought I was.
15:48Planning the wedding was a nightmare.
15:51And then I saw you.
15:52Titi Bank.
15:58So, like, a rip-
15:59That's what I thought.
16:02Like, Titi Bank.
16:05We don't call this Titi Bank.
16:06It is.
16:07Titi Bank.
16:09Oh!
16:12Titi Bank.
16:15Yeah.
16:16Titi Bank.
16:17Titi Bank.
16:30Fuck.
16:32It's the douchebag de Laval.
16:37John Guy of scrap.
16:38I'm good for a scrap.
16:39John Carl of scrap.
16:41Yeah, I have a scrap.
16:42John Pierre of scrap.
16:43Heck, it's a good scrap, old John Wayne.
16:45I have a scrap.
16:47Fuck, boys.
16:48Let's have a scrap.
16:50So, what was all this talk about?
16:51A Titi Bank?
16:53Is it close by, or...
16:56Map question?
16:59Or...
17:00Should we get a motel and stay the night, or...
17:03McMurray?
17:17Hey.
17:18How do you know?
17:20You hear that?
17:22Oh.
17:23That's the most aggressive two-step I think I ever heard.
17:26That's no two-step.
17:27Hmm?
17:27It's showtime.
17:28Must be me for not washing my hands.
17:37I'm going to go.
17:38Buddy.
17:38I'm going to go.
17:47Bye-bye.
17:55Bye-bye.
18:04Bye-bye.
18:06That I see within your eyes
18:11What the times with your cries
18:19You are contagious
18:26I'm walking bros
18:30I see on the TV
18:34I think you need to know
18:38That you
18:40You are a man to kill
18:44You're still wasting glue
18:48You're still on your roof
18:52Your death moves
18:55It's frozen in my neck
18:58Like a pad of sand
19:02Like a pad of sand
19:06You're still on your way
19:10But I can't hear
19:15Between your legs
19:17Deep in the heavens
19:23You're still on your way
19:31That is a black hole
19:33I said poo
19:37You're nothing but a little pill
19:41I'm not touching you
19:45I knew
19:47You are a man to kill
19:51You're still on your feet
19:54But you're still on the road
19:59Coming out
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