00:30My name is George W. Bush, and I approve this message.
00:41Tacos rule.
00:47This is your brain, and this is heroin.
00:52This is what happens to your brain on heroin.
01:00And this is what your body goes through, but it's not over yet.
01:04This is what happens to your grades, to your friends, to all your stuff.
01:09This is what happens to the profits from your grandma's bake sale.
01:12This is what happens to the world economy, and your boyfriend gives you herpes simplex A.
01:18And you end up getting a stupid tattoo of a unicorn on your left cheek that was supposed to be a bitchin' firebird,
01:27but you were too strung out to notice at the time.
01:42We just want to help.
01:45This is what happens to family values.
01:48This is what happens to the pollen count.
01:51Any questions?
01:53Any questions?
01:57This is the spot!
02:03The Decepticons are using the damn below to stockpile Energon cubes!
02:10Megatron must be stopped!
02:13Autobots, transform and ro-
02:16Hold on a second.
02:18Are you okay?
02:33Let's get him!
02:34Megatron was defeated with only 50 humans killed in the crossfire!
02:55A new record!
02:57Hooray!
03:02Hey, Prowl!
03:04Have you noticed how often Prime needs to drain the lizard nowadays?
03:08Yeah.
03:09He must be French because he's a peeing!
03:13I think that joke goes,
03:16you're a peeing!
03:17Ha ha!
03:18But I'm not!
03:21Ugh, such a retarded con.
03:27Uh-oh.
03:28I didn't think going to the bathroom so often was a problem.
03:33But just today, I saw blood in my urine!
03:36Ewww. Well, I'd better have a look.
03:42Ow!
03:46Using the whole fist, Doc?
03:49It's what I feared.
03:51Prostate cancer.
03:53And it's advanced.
03:54I'm sorry, Prime, but you're going to die.
04:06Ewww.
04:26Ewww!
04:28Ewww!
04:30Hi, I'm Optimus Prime.
04:39What you've just seen was a dramatization of what you, your friends, and your family go through if you don't get regular prostate exams.
04:50Now, we Transformers don't have organic internal organs and can't get cancer, but you do.
05:00And you can.
05:03So get your ass checked out before it's too late, turkeys!
05:06This has been a message from the Cybertronia Medical Association.
05:09Reality TV has never been this honest, this brutal!
05:16Coming soon, it's the world's most one-sided fistfights caught on film!
05:23Television too brutal to watch, yet you can't turn away!
05:30Thursdays at 8 p.m. It's the world's most one-sided fistfights caught on film!
05:51All right guys, I'll see you back in the yard.
05:55Hey, what the-
05:56Call a card?
06:02It, uh, it burns when I pee.
06:05What did I just tell you?
06:07This new tax appropriations bill will result in a...
06:12My name is Tiffany McNamary from Clifton, New Jersey, and I think Senator Davidson rocks!
06:17My name is Natalie Fratella from Danbury, Connecticut, and I think legislation and kind of infrastructure funds 4% in the upcoming fiscal year rules.
