00:00TREAKLE, TREAKLE, TREAKLE
00:04We are the TREAKLE PEOPLE
00:06We sing TREAKLE, I AM LOWE
00:08We are the TREAKLE PEOPLE
00:10We all live in Giggle Row
00:12We're a whistle, step a day
00:14It's TREAKLE, TRAKLE, and the way
00:16To see him's a TREAKLE far below
00:18Down to the mic TREAKLE
00:20TREAKLE, TREAKLE, TREAKLE
00:23We are the TREAKLE PEOPLE
00:25We sing TREAKLE, I AM LOWE
00:27It was almost Christmas in the little TREAKLE-mining village of Sabden
00:32It often was in December
00:34And everyone was feeling the spirit of peace and goodwill
00:39Except for Liam Cliff
00:41Oh, stupid thing
00:43And Nelly New Church
00:45Will you start?
00:47Oh, and Tapper of course
00:50Aha!
00:57And PC Pendle
00:58Ah, Christmas
01:00I can double the price of TREAKLE TOFFEE
01:02Not mentioned, Silas Mitten
01:05Oh, alright
01:06Then everyone else was feeling the spirit of what's it and what's it
01:09And especially young Rosie and Whistle and Bert the Boggart
01:12And Leil and Lil's Bubble and Boggart Capital
01:16It's easy to act a stocking on the mantelpiece, Winkle
01:19But you have to take your foot out of it first
01:22Hey Rosie, good thinking
01:24Ta-ra!
01:25The Christmas pudding
01:27Let's see Nelly fancy New Church beat that
01:33It just needs the finishing touch
01:36Charlie the Holly
01:38Oh, no!
01:39Oh, no!
01:40Wow, man
01:41It's Christmas pudding!
01:42Get off to this!
01:43Oh, how?
01:44This will put Leil and Lil's pathetic pudding in the shade
01:46Oh, my name's not Nelly New Church
01:47Oh, no!
01:48Oh, no!
01:49Oh, no!
01:50Oh, no!
01:51Oh, no!
01:52Oh, no!
01:53Oh, no!
01:54Oh, no!
01:55Oh, no!
01:56Oh, no!
01:57Oh, no!
01:58Oh, no!
01:59Oh, no!
02:00Oh, no!
02:01Oh, no!
02:02Oh, no!
02:03Oh, no!
02:04Oh, no!
02:05Oh, no!
02:06Oh, no!
02:07Oh, no!
02:08Oh, no!
02:09Oh, no!
02:10Oh, no!
02:11Hello, hello!
02:12A Christmas pudding!
02:13Drive-in without due care and attention!
02:19Oh!
02:20Pinky Pendle!
02:22Rosie, Wizzle, I hope you've got a licence for that pudding.
02:25It's not ours!
02:26Ah, pursuing a pudding without the owner's consent!
02:29It's Lil's!
02:30Get after it!
02:32Hey-oop!
02:36Follow that pudding.
02:37I'm not chasing down mine after a Christmas pudding.
02:40It's Lelph!
02:42Get after it!
03:06This is not good.
03:36Oh, let my pudding drown!
03:39We did our best, though.
03:40Huh!
03:41Men, fine Christmas it's going to be without a Christmas pudding.
03:47Or Nellie's cake.
03:49Only joking.
03:50I just wish it would snow.
03:53Ah, snow.
03:55What about snow, Professor?
03:58Well, I've still got the weather machine my dear old dad built.
04:02Oh, and did it work?
04:03Nearly.
04:06So that's a weather machine.
04:08I can see where it gets its name.
04:09Uh, where?
04:10There's no knowing whether it'll work.
04:12I'm sorry.
04:13Oh, just get it going.
04:14Yes.
04:15Well, I swish on here, put the indicator to snow,
04:20and it should start to produce...
04:22Snow?
04:23Yes.
04:23Where?
04:24Well, there's an inlet and an outlet.
04:27Uh-huh.
04:27But I can't remember which is which.
04:29Well, I'll stand here.
04:30Right.
04:38Ah, so that's the weather machine.
04:42Does it work?
04:44It might.
04:45I'll tell you what, Silas.
04:46You stand here, and you'll be the first to know.
04:49Right, Prof?
04:49Right, Professor.
04:54Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.
04:57Right.
05:04There.
05:05And where's the snow?
05:06Oh, ee, you little faith.
05:08That is cumulonimbus, snowy-eye cloud.
05:11The snow will fall any second now.
05:14Any minute now.
05:17Soon.
05:18Quite soon.
05:19No, Professor.
05:21Oh, dear.
05:23It gets better by the minute.
05:25No pudding.
05:26No cake.
05:26No snow.
05:27And no Father Christmas.
05:29No Father Christmas.
05:31Well, with all this cloud,
05:33how's Santa going to find the village?
05:35Oh, man.
05:36Oh, ee.
05:37He'll come flying over,
05:39say nothing and get diverted to Heathrow.
05:42Oh!
05:45Santa Claus and Father Christmas,
05:47they're both the same.
05:50It comes every Christmas in a magic sledge
05:53pulled by reindeer.
05:55Oh, for me, eh?
05:56Reindeer, they're like...
05:58They're like the moobank
05:59with a hat rack on its head.
06:02It comes from his home
06:04at the North Pole
06:05with presents for everybody.
06:07Yes, you too.
06:12Except this year,
06:15he won't be coming.
06:18So, you're going to be Father Christmas.
06:21Me?
06:21I am an officer of the law.
06:23I'm not having people disappointed.
06:25Don't be ridiculous.
06:27How can I be Santa Claus?
06:28Get costume,
06:29fix beard,
06:30eye a swedge,
06:31find reindeer
06:32and move.
06:34I still don't get it.
06:36Simple.
06:36The balloon will be over the village
06:39and above the cloud.
06:40So Santa can't miss it.
06:42At last.
06:44He's come up with something useful.
06:46Stand back, please.
06:50There.
06:52Oh!
06:53Oh!
06:54Oh!
06:55Oh!
06:55Oh!
06:55Oh!
06:55Oh!
06:56Oh!
06:56He's done it again.
07:03Now,
07:05but for Bali.
07:06It's like a little man
07:08with a big fat chest
07:09and a big fat tummy.
07:11I had a boyfriend like that once.
07:14He didn't last.
07:15I don't know why I'm bothering.
07:17What's the use of writing to Santa
07:19if he isn't going to come?
07:20He'll turn up.
07:21Don't you worry, Chuck.
07:23He'll be getting ready to leave the shed
07:24any time now.
07:26Shed?
07:26Er, pull.
07:27North pull.
07:28He, er,
07:29he should be getting ready to leave it.
07:31Lots of barley sugar.
07:35Well, I don't think that's how you spell it.
07:37I thought it was.
07:38But I don't suppose Santa will mind.
07:41Would have minded.
07:44Yes, dear.
07:45I'll be home for breakfast.
07:47Of course I'm wearing a vest.
07:49I have done it before, you know.
07:50Look, I must go.
07:52I've got to feed the reindeer, dear.
07:54Now,
07:55spare gloves, yes.
07:57Ranger hay, yes.
08:00Beard brush.
08:01Ah, ah.
08:02Chimney oil.
08:04Look, dear,
08:05you're going to make me late.
08:06Oh, it's you, Ethelred.
08:08What's the problem?
08:09Not ready.
08:11Not ready?
08:12I told you we needed new runners on the sledge
08:14weeks ago.
08:17You've been busy.
08:18Have you ever tried wrapping
08:1957 million children's presents?
08:22And how am I supposed to deliver them now?
08:24By balloon, perhaps.
08:27Ha!
08:27Uh-huh.
08:28Ah, ha-ha.
08:30Bye balloon.
08:35Wow.
08:37Steady, Rudolph.
08:38Oh!
08:40Hey, by gun.
08:41This is exciting.
08:42Five minutes to midnight.
08:43Ho, ho, ho.
08:45Right, Nico.
08:46This is it.
08:46Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one, go!
08:59Right, Rudolph.
09:00Bush, bush.
09:02Steady, steady.
09:05Whoa, whoa, Ike, where's the brake?
09:08Brake?
09:09Oh, Ike, there's always something.
09:12Whoa, Rudolph, Rudolph, go back.
09:15Do you mind?
09:17Please?
09:18Whoa, help, help.
09:22You'd better get to bed, Charlie.
09:25When you've whitewashed the mistletoe and dusted the pad.
09:30What the bash-a-lease was that?
09:33Charlie, how long have we had a Stag's Head trophy?
09:39The box.
09:40Oh, oh, oh.
09:44Wonderful.
09:45No pudding, no cake.
09:49No snow, no Santa.
09:53And now, no PC Pendle, men.
09:59Yes, wonder where I am.
10:05Better drop through the cloud and find out.
10:08Now, Sabden Village, one mile.
10:26Well, the wind's in the west, the compass is pointing south, so if it takes three men five days to fill a bath with water...
10:32Hello, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, and what's your name?
10:48Bert Boggart.
10:49Bert Boggart, didn't you write me a letter?
10:53I thought so.
10:55That's not how you spell barley sugar, by the way.
10:57Never mind.
10:59A lot to do, presents to deliver.
11:01Need a lot of help.
11:02Any ideas?
11:04Right, follow me.
11:05I'll be right behind you.
11:06I am not happy, madam.
11:08I am not at all happy.
11:10Why can't I just deliver everyone's presents through the front door?
11:12Because you're Santa, and Santa always comes down the chimney.
11:17I've never heard such...
11:18You don't have to say yes.
11:20You can always say no and get on the wrong side of me.
11:23I'm going, I'm going.
11:25So am I.
11:27Wait a minute.
11:27You're holding the letter.
11:29No, I'm going to bed.
11:31You can't do that.
11:32I have to.
11:34If I'm not asleep in bed when Santa arrives, he might not leave me any presents.
11:39But I'm Santa.
11:41Lil, madam.
11:43Oh, very nice.
11:45And happy Christmas to you, too.
11:48Yes, lots of help.
11:50Good thinking, Bert.
11:53Hello?
11:57I'm stuck.
11:58Oh, no.
11:59This is all I need.
12:00All right, all right.
12:01Two sticks of barley sugar each, and a pair of teddy bear slippers, and a set of stainless steel
12:06tickle spoons.
12:09Good show.
12:11You Adam and Eve.
12:17Aha!
12:19Whoa!
12:21Keep it moving, chaps.
12:23We haven't much time.
12:24Hurry up!
12:27Help!
12:29Help!
12:32Help!
12:34Help!
12:35Lil!
12:36Someone!
12:37Someone!
12:37Ho, ho, ho!
12:55Ho, ho, ho, ho!
12:57Ha!
12:58Amateurs.
12:59Hello.
13:01Is there someone there?
13:02Ho, ho, ho!
13:03Never mind the ho, ho, ho.
13:06Somebody get me out.
13:06Ho, ho, ho!
13:08Good old Nick.
13:12So, thank you all, and a merry Christmas.
13:15Ho, ho, ho.
13:18Don't eat all the barley sugar at once.
13:21And remember, clean your teeth.
13:25Goodbye!
13:28Goodbye!
13:29Goodbye!
13:29I'm sure there was something else.
13:36Ah, yes.
13:36Now, now, now, where?
13:38Oh, crap.
13:39Oh, ah, ah.
13:40Got it.
13:42Ha, ha, ha, ha.
13:43Let it snow.
13:45Let it snow.
13:46Let it snow.
13:47Ho, ho, ho.
13:49He's big!
13:50He's big!
13:52Hey!
13:52Oh, nice.
13:53Oh, nice.
13:53Oh, wonderful.
13:54Yes.
13:54Good night.
13:56Hooray!
13:56Merry Christmas!
13:59Merry Christmas!
14:00Merry Christmas!
14:00Merry Christmas!
14:07Ah!
14:11For me?
14:12From Santa?
14:14Oh, that's touching, that is.
14:16A merry Christmas.
14:18Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
14:19Oh.
14:20I just hope he hasn't got soot all over me parking.
14:23We wish you a merry Christmas.
14:27We wish you a merry Christmas.
14:28We wish you a merry Christmas.
14:30And a happy new year.
14:32We all want some treacle party.
14:34So, as the snow falls and the ginger beer rises,
14:37we look forward to a parking new year with the treacle people
14:40and wish you all a sticky Christmas.
14:43We are the treacle people.
14:45We sing, treacle, I am low.
14:47We are the treacle people.
14:49We all live in giggle room.
14:51In these troubled times,
14:54one has fined the treacle people a great comfort.
14:57Down to the mind we go.
14:59Treacle, treacle, treacle.
15:02And finally, it only remains for one to say,
15:05God bless you all.
