- 1 year ago
Lucy Dacus looks back on the moments that shaped her career and reflects on her journey as an artist. From playing the famed 'Lady Gaga' slot at Lollapalooza to meeting her boygenius bandmate and now-partner Julien Baker for the first time, Lucy breaks down some of the memorable highlights from her life.
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00:00God bless fat d**ks and studs in my life,
00:04in my personal life, in my crowds,
00:09the ones I'll never meet that have defined queer history
00:11and queer rights forever.
00:13Hi, I'm Lucy Dacus, and today we're looking back
00:16at some moments that have shaped me as an artist.
00:18♪♪
00:23Oh, my God.
00:25So, it's this type of thing.
00:27My stomach just sank. I don't know if it's good or bad.
00:29Should I push play? I'm, like, gonna throw up.
00:32This is a video of me performing with The Moors.
00:35The Moors were a band.
00:36It's Preston Cochran and Scotty Perdue,
00:39who I have recorded with a ton since.
00:42That was the first time I'd ever sung with a band.
00:45They asked me to come sing
00:46Just Like Heaven by The Cure, one of my favorite songs.
00:49It is my favorite song because my first boyfriend
00:52in middle school was like, this is our song.
00:54And so then I listened to it so much
00:56that the next boy that had a crush on me was like,
00:58this is our song.
01:00And then this happened, like, kind of over and over.
01:03And so at the show, I was like, cool,
01:05I'll go and sing this song.
01:07And then the front row, my first middle school boyfriend,
01:10my ex, another person that was trying to date me,
01:15a person that I was trying to date,
01:16all with one foot, the stage is like this tall,
01:19one foot on the stage, like, singing every word
01:21as if, like, we're having a moment.
01:23My good friend Alex, at the time,
01:25just once the song was over, pulled me off stage.
01:29It was like, we're getting in the car,
01:30we need to get out of here.
01:31One day, I just saw they had a show
01:33and I didn't know about the show.
01:35And I was like, what's up with that?
01:37Like, we didn't have band practice, what's up?
01:40And they were like, oh, yeah.
01:42Like, unceremoniously out of the band.
01:472016, release of No Burden.
01:49And it's a picture of me at Lollapalooza,
01:52which by the way, they were like, you're on the Gaga stage.
01:55So I had the opening slot on the smallest stage
01:59and they were like, this is actually a huge honor,
02:01Lady Gaga played this slot.
02:02And it's like, really coveted.
02:04I think they paid me, I don't know,
02:06like 250, like $500 or something.
02:09Like, something that was basically zero.
02:14But I was like, let me do it, I really want to.
02:16I think I was nervous,
02:18but I had, like, so many people around me.
02:20It was like, so fun.
02:22We had a 15-passenger van we were touring in for the band
02:25and then every extra seat we filled with friends
02:29and we would camp.
02:30I have, like, recurring back pain from touring like that.
02:35So the same friend, Alex Mitchell,
02:38that pulled me off the stage of The More Show,
02:40is like a stylist and I've worked with her a bunch.
02:43It was her idea for the Boy Genius Rolling Stone cover
02:45to be the Nirvana copy.
02:48She handed me Mac Ruby Woo one day
02:50and was like, wear this at shows.
02:52And I was like, okay.
02:53And I didn't have another piece of makeup
02:57for, like, many years.
02:59And just a red lip convinces people
03:01you know what's happening.
03:03I still wear it a lot, but obviously not all the time.
03:06It was kind of maybe like a crutch.
03:08Not like a serious crutch, that's like so dramatic.
03:11But I was like, oh, I can't be seen without this.
03:14And now I'm like, more light-hearted.
03:16Okay, growth.
03:17Okay, growth.
03:18Okay, growth.
03:19Yeah.
03:20Ding.
03:22Release of Historian 2018.
03:26I've always been afraid of losing my memory
03:30and all these things that I'm making
03:33are mostly for me to have later.
03:36Music has always been an outlet for me.
03:38I want to make this album that shows people
03:42what my thoughts are about life.
03:44Realizing that we make all these histories,
03:48but the histories outlive us.
03:51Obviously, Night Shift is on that record.
03:53And that, it's like my one breakup song.
03:58I feel like it's still finding people
03:59in their dark, sad times.
04:02And why make recordings if not for that reason?
04:06Ding.
04:07Yeah, boy, Genius Forums.
04:09You want to hear about it?
04:11Yeah, I think so.
04:14And this is us playing Seth Meyers, I think.
04:17I had opened for Julian at DC9 nine years ago,
04:22this past January.
04:23And Phoebe opened another date of her tour.
04:26She talked us up to each other, made us meet.
04:30We liked each other.
04:31And then we all were going on tour
04:33and we were like, we should just do a song
04:36to do for the encore.
04:38That'll be cute.
04:38And then we did six songs and it's a whole band.
04:41And like that tour, one month tour became,
04:44people were looking forward to those songs.
04:47And then we disappeared for five years.
04:49The night I met Julian is probably the most important night
04:52of my life for lots of reasons.
04:54I mean, meeting Julian is its own reason.
04:57Like we just kept talking like that day
05:01and every day since.
05:03Phoebe obviously, like that's my family.
05:06I don't know, I moved to LA to be closer to Phoebe.
05:09We show each other everything.
05:11Like it's definitely changed my music
05:16in that I have two other great minds
05:19to put through my own thoughts
05:23and like a sieve come out with something better.
05:28That's not really what sieves do, but I like the visual.
05:31Yeah, I feel like I got smarter.
05:32I got stupider.
05:33I have more fun.
05:35I take myself less seriously, but I also like what I do more.
05:412021, three years have passed.
05:43Nothing happened.
05:47Release of home video.
05:49And you have the music video for VBS,
05:52which is a beautiful animated video by Marin Leong,
05:55one of my oldest friends who did all the art
05:57for that album cycle.
06:00Thank you, Marin, for your service.
06:02And I'm from Richmond, Virginia.
06:03We're here in DC.
06:04It feels kind of like home and it's a Sunday.
06:07And I haven't like been to church in a long time,
06:09but I still think about God all the time.
06:11I was like obsessed with church growing up,
06:14like almost every night of the week, going to church,
06:16going to vacation Bible school,
06:18going over to friends' houses and doing Bible study
06:21as our hanging out method.
06:23Like not even sanctioned stuff.
06:25Like me and my friends were just singing Christian rock
06:30at each other's houses on acoustic guitar.
06:35Maybe a ukulele.
06:36You heard of this?
06:37Like love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
06:40gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control.
06:43That's in the Bible.
06:44Those are all still really good.
06:47So I like still,
06:50there's stuff that has like hung out with me since youth.
06:54And yeah, it's all over this record.
06:58What did it feel like to write such personal stuff
07:01and know that so many people were gonna have access to it?
07:03Putting out music is really unpleasant.
07:05I think that's something I'm like coming to terms
07:08with because I think I always trick myself
07:09into like, no, I love this.
07:11What an amazing feeling.
07:13No, putting out music feels so bad.
07:16I think it's worth it.
07:17I'm not writing thinking someone will hear this.
07:19I write knowing I have the rights
07:21to never tell anyone anything.
07:24This next record,
07:24I've never been more freaked out than right now.
07:29Like doing promo for a record that's not out
07:32that is even more personal than this.
07:35Cause this, at least I had distance from the material
07:37where it was like the new one is all like very present.
07:462023 True Blue music video.
07:48Kristen Stewart is everything you would hope she would be.
07:52She has all of these amazing ideas.
07:55And when she was like, here's how it's gonna be.
07:58She like went into actor mode and was like,
08:01like going into the corner and like showing, you know,
08:04or like how Julian was supposed to wake up from bed
08:06in the 20 bucks video, or just like, you know,
08:09I was even, I was supposed to cry.
08:11She's like, I want you to cry like this.
08:13And then she made eye contact with me
08:14and just started crying.
08:16And it was like, oh, so acting really is a skill.
08:19This video, like I like wrote up a treatment for it.
08:23And it was kind of like both of our ideas married.
08:26And we were like passing books back and forth.
08:29So fun playing with the paint.
08:32Just like, I don't know how you can make this scenario
08:35happen in your life,
08:36but just pour some paint on the ground and move around.
08:422023 Night Shift music video.
08:45I love this.
08:47I'm really proud of this.
08:48Jane Shumbrun, now lauded director
08:51and then lauded director of I Saw the TV Glow.
08:54And we're all going to the World's Fair.
08:56Jane rocks.
08:59And it was so fun to watch direct.
09:02Jane was like, I manifested that we're working together.
09:04And I said, yes, Jane, anything you say.
09:08So I think that was just some like cosmic pairing,
09:12but it was cool to do the music video
09:14five years after the song came out
09:16because of the five years lyric.
09:20And this, yeah, song never got a music video.
09:22And then Jane was like, what if it's like kink conference,
09:27like Wizard of Oz kink in a love hotel.
09:31I was like, go forth.
09:36I think super visually, to me, albums are kind of like
09:39movies, like every song is a scene.
09:41And so you have to think about like pacing and contrast
09:44and what people earn in like the plot of it.
09:47So a lot of the times, like my favorite songs
09:49are at the end because that's like
09:51what you've earned thematically.
09:53But yeah, I have ideas.
09:55I put them in a note in my phone sometimes.
09:57And that's, I think, how it should be.
10:00You should not make a music video
10:01unless you have an idea that is a piece of art
10:04you can be proud of on its own.
10:05It's not just a promotional tool.
10:08I should rewatch this.
10:09This shit bangs.
10:132025 best guest music video.
10:14You skipped the ankles video, but that's okay.
10:18I love this video.
10:20I have been wanting to like talk about this.
10:23The original idea, so it's the first love song
10:27where I use like she pronouns.
10:29So I was like, okay, like my first really overtly gay tune.
10:33Like what if it's like a bachelor party for me
10:36with a bunch of other people in like groom bachelor attire
10:42doing some guy shit, like arm wrestling and playing pool
10:46and just like what we could fit in a studio
10:49in a one day shoot.
10:51I think toxic masculinity is involved
10:54in our current political states
10:56like in widespread like transphobia and homophobia.
11:01So I was like, what about some like joyful examples
11:04of masculinity, which is within anyone, like of any gender.
11:09So it's like, we have men and women
11:11and non-binary people engaging with masculinity.
11:14I think the song was the perfect pairing for that idea.
11:18It was such a wonderful day.
11:19There's been kind of like some response
11:22that it's like been disappointing.
11:23So let me say out loud, happily,
11:27God bless fat dicks and studs in my life,
11:31in my personal life, in my crowds,
11:36the ones I'll never meet that have defined queer history
11:38and queer rights forever.
11:40Would have loved also to have more fat dicks
11:43and studs in the video.
11:44We reached out to some, it was a tight turnaround.
11:48And despite that over half the cast is not white.
11:53You know, I don't wanna like speak on it too much
11:55because it's other people's identities in the conversation.
11:59It's not just like my art.
12:00Just wish that like these really sweet people
12:02hadn't gotten ugly energy.
12:05But ultimately like I've also been getting
12:08really amazing messages from people.
12:12There's like elder queers who are like,
12:15I have buried friends from AIDS.
12:18Like I never thought something like this would exist.
12:30From like parents with like really young queer kids
12:34that are like, I'm so glad that my kid can like
12:37see a person, a non-binary person with top surgery scars.
12:41One of the participants told me
12:43they have like a group of friends in Palestine.
12:47A bunch of Palestinian dicks were like super touched
12:50by this, which made me like burst into tears.
12:53So I'm super proud of like where it's ending up
12:56in the world and I hope that ultimately
12:59it can be like a positive thing.
13:042025, forever is a feeling.
13:08Coming out March 28th.
13:09Is forever a feeling?
13:11Yes, forever is a feeling.
13:15Forever is a feeling that passes,
13:17but as it's happening, it's forever.
13:22I feel like if you have felt it,
13:24you know what I'm talking about,
13:26which is maybe annoying to say,
13:27but like, you know, everything passes.
13:30I stay obviously aware of how time takes everything
13:36away from us, but like the moments that you feel
13:41you're within forever and in love or in presence
13:45or have peace, like those like ring on and mean something.
13:50It'd be better if we valued love for what it can be
13:54in the present moment than for what it can be counted upon
13:59in the future, you know what I'm saying?
14:00Like the future is uncertain and things change
14:03and you should accept the love that you can get
14:05in the moments that you can and give the love that you can
14:11and not be like bartering with it like money.
14:15And is there anything else that you want people to know
14:17about this album?
14:18If you can, please approach this album with an open heart.
14:25Please.
14:28Okay, that's it.
14:30I'm Lucy Dacus and this has been Becoming.
14:33All right.
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