00:00People think that I hate my children. I really don't. I absolutely adore my
00:04children and I'm in a situation now where I really have to be my strongest
00:08self for them and I felt like it was getting harder and harder for me to be
00:11able to show up for them in the way that they need me to and yeah it was a really
00:15big decision to have to like leave them for a few weeks to go and focus on
00:19myself but ultimately it was for them you know yes it's for me but it's for
00:24them so that I can you know get us through this bit. I need some help to be
00:28able to do that. Also I think that there's a real difference with Ethel and
00:31Marnie's ages at the moment where like you might be shown that they're like
00:34your team right now. Yes and no. I mean you know I don't want them to ever feel
00:38like they have to prop me up like you know that none of this is their fault
00:42and you know and it's my job to support them and make them feel safe and secure
00:46and I just don't think I was able to do that because of the sort of emotional
00:50turmoil that I was in at the time but I do feel like I am now you know so I'm
00:56not saying I'm a hundred percent there and I'm not saying that I'm getting it a
00:59hundred percent right or ever will but I'm definitely in a stronger a stronger
01:03place.
