00:00The doctors didn't believe my baby was mine.
00:02Are you sure I shouldn't ask for maternity test?
00:06I had to carry I.D. cards for my kids just to prove that they are mine.
00:11I just want to be a mom.
00:13Baby!
00:14It's Mila baby!
00:16What happened at the bus?
00:19Oh!
00:20Let's do some jumping jack, jack.
00:22What?
00:23We're not doing jumping jack.
00:24Oh.
00:25Let's do some jumping jack, jack.
00:28Hi, my name is Tina.
00:29Hi, my name is Anton.
00:31This is Mila and she is 10 months old.
00:35And this is Michelle. How old are you?
00:38Two years old.
00:40How long have you been together guys and how did you meet?
00:43Well, we've been together for, what is it, four years now?
00:47Yeah, four years.
00:48Four years.
00:51We met through a very famous dating app.
00:55From our first date, it was like magic.
00:58Okay?
00:59That's all I have to say.
01:01Are you ready to bake?
01:02Yes!
01:03Say yay!
01:05Hold it.
01:06Put it there.
01:09Cut it, cut it.
01:10Done!
01:12Well done!
01:15Can you please tell me about how it was giving birth?
01:17She came when she was seven months old.
01:19I would never in my widest imagination thought my daughter was going to be ready.
01:23Even if my husband was.
01:25My daughter wasn't looking half Nigerian.
01:28I keep getting that thing in my head, she really might because she doesn't look like me.
01:32But a lot of family and friends keep saying, don't worry, she's going to get darker.
01:36Her hair colour is going to change, it's going to be okay.
01:40Here we are.
01:42She's the cutest ginger ever.
01:45Is it nice?
01:48It's really nice, huh?
01:50It's really nice, huh?
01:51I had to put her in a special care and I was changing her diaper.
01:55There was a doctor who came to check on her and I saw her waiting for like 10 minutes.
02:00So I asked her, are you waiting for someone?
02:02She said, no, I'm waiting for the mum to come because I have to talk to her about something.
02:06And I'm like, I'm the mum.
02:08The doctor said, oh sorry, I thought you were the nanny.
02:11She was apologising and I told her it was fine because anybody would have asked.
02:16And that was my first experience I had with her.
02:18And after then, it actually dawned on me that, girl, I have to be ready when I go out of the hospital
02:24because anything at this point is possible.
02:28It's raw, you shouldn't eat it.
02:30Okay, you have to just put it in here, yeah?
02:32Okay.
02:33Do you want to try it like mama, like this?
02:37When Mila was also born, she was also red-haired.
02:40I had a big experience at the supermarket as well.
02:43So Mila started crying.
02:44She was really crying so hard and this lady just woke up to me.
02:47I don't think the mother is going to like her crying.
02:49Do you need help?
02:51I just straight up just told her, no, thank you.
02:53She's my daughter.
02:54How does this make you feel?
02:56I feel overwhelmed.
02:57I feel blessed.
02:59I feel exhausted from explaining myself.
03:02She's a very nice person.
03:04She's a very kind person.
03:06I feel exhausted from explaining myself.
03:09I just want to be a mom.
03:11I just want to be looked at as a mom.
03:13I don't want to be always attacked with that question.
03:17So I just want to show you guys this.
03:19So this is Michelle's ID card.
03:21I always have to take it with me, even though I don't want to take it,
03:25but just so I don't get asked questions that I'm not prepared for.
03:28Yeah, it's very uncommon for Dutch children to have an ID.
03:32Yeah.
03:36I have a surprise for you guys.
03:37I'm going to be giving away these pairs of shoes
03:41because it's 2025 and it's going to be giveaway season.
03:45When did you start posting on social media?
03:47I've been posting for so long.
03:49I used to do hair tutorials, makeup and stuff.
03:51That was back in the days.
03:53So when I got married and I had my baby,
03:55I still really didn't post my childbirth and everything
03:58because it was a little bit too much for me.
04:01But after all the comments I've been getting for physical contact with people
04:05and stuff, I thought maybe it's time for me to just share it.
04:09Let me just post it on social media and just for the fun of it.
04:13I really wanted to see what is going on in people's heads when they see this.
04:17After nine months of pregnancy, this is what I got.
04:21And it went crazy.
04:23It was all over the internet.
04:25Let me read some of the comments that I've been getting.
04:28The first one is, you are not the baby mother.
04:32My reaction to this comment is, I'm the mother, deal with it.
04:38The second comment is, maternity test for mom, please.
04:42Don't blame me for this comment.
04:44Because sometimes when I look at her, I'm like,
04:46are you sure I shouldn't ask for maternity test?
04:49This comment says, were you even there, sis?
04:56I was there.
04:57You're going to see the proof when they grow up.
05:00They're going to have my nose.
05:01They're going to have some of my chin.
05:04So it's going to be okay.
05:06Are you a house sitter or a babysitter?
05:09Because they don't look like yours.
05:11Okay.
05:12I am all of the above.
05:13I'm everything.
05:14So it's a whole list of jobs that is added to motherhood.
05:19And I'm taking it all in.
05:21I am the mom.
05:22I love my kids.
05:23I love the way they look.
05:24They look amazing.
05:26I'm grateful.
05:27And I'm just blessed to have them.
05:29My husband is not a social media person.
05:32He's more like a chill guy.
05:34More like, don't want to do my thing.
05:37What does that mean?
05:39What does that have to do with anything?
05:41It means you're chill.
05:43When I said I got a bad comment and you were telling me on the stairs,
05:46you have to choose.
05:47If you want to keep doing social media,
05:49you need to know about the comment.
05:50You have to.
05:51You're going to get bad comments.
05:52Yeah.
05:53That's bad people.
05:54So people are going to say bad stuff.
05:56Okay.
05:57Are you ready?
05:58And if that's going to affect you,
06:00then you shouldn't be in social media.
06:02And since then, she's not been focusing on the negative comments,
06:05just on positive comments.
06:07As my manager.
06:08As your manager of your mental health.
06:17I also got a lot of comments from Nigerians from my country as well.
06:21They were saying, oh, she doesn't look like us, but it's fine.
06:24Keep the look.
06:25Keep the look.
06:26You've got Ajin because it's in there.
06:28She's eating African food, spicy food, everything.
06:32She's eating it.
06:33She loves it.
06:38What happened at the bus?
06:40Oh, I was asked for an ID.
06:42So I don't know if it's because it was an international bus or whatever,
06:46but I was literally asked for an ID.
06:49And I had to call my husband to send me a screenshot of the passport
06:53for Mila because I didn't have an ID card for her.
06:56I didn't really take it personal, but we were the only one that was asked.
07:03I'm not calling it discrimination.
07:05I just think it's just strange for people to think you have a child
07:09that doesn't look like you.
07:10So it's always a stare when you go out there with your kids
07:13and everybody's like, oh, they're so cute.
07:15They've got red hair.
07:16Anton, when he's with me, we don't get the question a lot.
07:19We only get that stare.
07:21But when I'm alone, I get a lot of stare, a lot of questions, a lot of doubting.
07:26You see it on people's faces.
07:28It's such a thing that now, if I am going anywhere, I'm just double prepared.
07:33I just have to be ready.
07:34I'm just overthinking things.
07:36What if, what if?
07:41My gene is going to fight back in the next round, OK?
07:44So I need you guys to pray for me at this point.
07:51I hope we can continue this journey and show people how amazing our children are.
07:56And we are happy with our children and in the future.
07:59We want to see them be that person that they want to be.
08:02And we want to see them grow with the positive comments
08:05and the excitement of everything around them.
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