00:00But this is what I'm fighting with within myself and it has to do with my relationship
00:12to my husband.
00:14I have a beautiful husband and I mean, we have a wonderful life, but there is no attraction
00:23between us.
00:25And I feel like part of him, his prostate is enlarged, his heel is permanently inflamed.
00:40It's like the movement forward is very slow and I feel like that is stopping me and like,
00:51is there another man I'm supposed to be with?
01:03And besides that, I mean, I feel like I have worked on the relationship, man, woman with
01:11him all my life.
01:13I mean, we created, I'm eternally grateful to him.
01:18I feel like everything so far has been perfectly serving my growth, his growth, but now I
01:26feel like there is a standstill.
01:29And I've been reflecting on the questions that have been answered, putting them into
01:35my own life all the time, and I can see that there is a part of me, I really want him to
01:43be different for me, not to have to grow in a certain way.
01:51If we stand silent long enough, you will answer your own question, won't you?
01:57Yes.
01:58Well, let us jump in here and give you some soothing things to realize.
02:03You know, a lot of what people call attraction to one another is because most have already
02:13been trained away from their own guidance system.
02:18Most people that you know are not consciously reaching for good feeling thoughts for the
02:25sake of uniting with who they really are.
02:27It's not a concept that is consciously practiced among people who have been around for a while.
02:34Children practice it all day every day.
02:35Jerry and Esther were on an airplane recently where there was a young child, too small,
02:42Esther thought, to have the vocabulary it had.
02:44It wasn't walking and yet it was saying words.
02:48And this child was being strapped into the airplane seat and was not having any of it.
02:53It was really throwing a fit.
02:56So this little girl is just struggling and screaming and fighting her seatbelt and her
03:02parents were not doing anything about it because they couldn't.
03:06It was something that they felt required to do.
03:10And she was miserable and letting everyone within earshot, which meant everyone on the
03:15airplane, know it.
03:18And then within about a minute or less, she discovered a, then she got revengeful and
03:29she started saying mean things.
03:32She started saying, hurt me, you hurt me.
03:36And then other things that were inaudible but were belligerent as she was now making
03:44her statement of revenge, which was making her feel somewhat better.
03:49And then within less than a minute, she began making a gurgling sound in her mouth that
03:54she liked the feel and the sound of.
03:57And Jerry whispered to Esther, she's just moved into contentment.
04:04And then within another minute, she was laughing and playing.
04:09And Jerry and Esther sat feeling enthusiasm that is nearly indescribable as they had witnessed
04:17this child personally move herself up the emotional scale, a natural thing to do.
04:24And Esther could not help but notice that it was in large part because she was not interfered
04:30with by her parents.
04:32Her parents did not try to make it better.
04:35They did not respond to her.
04:37She just had her experience and her preferences to feel better.
04:40Now the basis of what we want to say to you, but most, most people, by the time they've
04:44been around for a while, they've been trained away from their own ability to move themselves
04:49up the scale.
04:51And you are, most of you, looking to others to help you to do it.
04:55So when someone with means or someone with intelligence or someone who adores you enters
05:01your experience and they hold you as an object of attention, you feel better for being part
05:08of their experience.
05:10And very often, as you are sitting here now, feeling sort of the absence of that feeling,
05:17we want to say it, it, it's a bit like, and so many people feel this in many areas of
05:23their life.
05:24It's like sometimes a person will say, I want such and such and, or I don't want that.
05:33And as we try to elicit from them other things that they might want in an effort to get them
05:39to focus more productively on things that would align them.
05:44Sometimes they will say emphatically, Abraham, I don't want that.
05:48I've already got that.
05:50And what they are imparting to us is that they associate the feeling of wanting with
05:56a little twinge of not having.
05:58In other words, a lot of people associate yearning with what we mean by wanting, where
06:04when we use the word want, we mean it interchangeably with desire.
06:09And we mean that feeling of expansion that is calling you to a better place.
06:16Desire in and of itself is a delicious thing.
06:18Stay with us.
06:19We're building a basis that you're really going to appreciate.
06:21So, so what we're getting at here with you is that you and almost everybody else, you
06:26know, we think have been misunderstanding some of what the satisfaction that you were
06:33getting from the relationship really is.
06:35You've heard us say it.
06:36We've said it as we've been together in these days, looking for love in all the wrong places.
06:40And now we'll just cut right to it quickly.
06:44You have discovered the deliciousness of alignment.
06:48And so you are not needing to receive your alignment through the eyes of some other.
06:56And you are also finding that self-satisfaction.
07:01And now it feels to you like the place that was giving you not that, but the replacement
07:07for it or the next best thing to it before you found this is going back.
07:12But it's, it, it doesn't mean that that relationship does not still have the potential of satisfying
07:17you.
07:18It means that you're asking for different things from it than you ever were before.
07:21Can you hear that?
07:22Yeah, I hear that.
07:23I am.
07:24Yeah, I do.
07:25That's what we mean when we say when people come together and in other words, when you
07:29tune into who you really are, and then you look at anyone and you just said it to us.
07:35It's what we were getting at when we were teasing you about answering your own questions.
07:39When when you realize that the lacks or missing parts that you see in someone else are not
07:47because there are missing parts, it is because you are choosing to focus other than what's
07:53in your vibrational escrow.
07:55We're not kidding you about that.
07:56You will never find fulfillment or freedom from any particle of the universe, including
08:02the person that you are living with.
08:04If you do anything less than accept that it's all up to you to find your satisfaction.
08:09And so we'll just say it in some, some brief and emphatic ways.
08:13It's your job to stay in love with another person.
08:16It's not their job to coax you into being in love with them.
08:20It's your job to stay in love and it, and let's take it further.
08:24We're not saying it's your job to stay in love with him in his falling apart state.
08:29We're saying it's, it's your job to focus upon him in the vibrational escrow.
08:35It's your job to see him as he really is, not as he is temporarily being, you see.
08:41And so when you say, is there another, what we want to say to you is there are endless
08:45ways that the universe will yield to you what you are wanting, but we can feel from everything
08:52that you've put into your vibrational escrow that walking away from that would leave you
08:56feeling far less satisfied than tuning yourself up and extracting from, from the vibrational
09:03escrow by virtue of your ability to focus upon it, a reason to feel good in this moment.
09:09We've really been talking about that a lot, and we know you're tired of hearing that you
09:15are the reason that you feel the way you do.
09:18When there's someone in your face that's doing something that you so wish that they would
09:21do differently.
09:22We know, we know that you want to, you think you want to hear that, but if we were to give
09:28that to you, it would disempower you because what it says is they have the power to make
09:34you feel the way you feel, which means they have the power to withhold or to give or to
09:39not know, to be ignorant, to be unwise.
09:42They have the power to mess up your experience by virtue of what they're doing and they do
09:48not.
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