00:00 I'm gonna do something scary. I'm going to go outside, walk down the street of my brand new neighborhood.
00:06 You can see my- I'm shaking.
00:08 I've met none of the neighbors to a mailbox that's on the street, right next to a very busy ice cream place,
00:14 so that I can mail a wedding invite.
00:17 None of them know I have a birthmark, and I am stressed.
00:23 Here's the fit. I'm hoping that they look at my outfit and not my face.
00:28 I show you guys my birthmark on the internet, but in person it is a completely different game.
00:35 Okay, let's go.
00:38 Oh, it's not super busy.
00:44 But it's by a very busy intersection.
00:49 Okay, there it is.
00:51 So far, I don't see literally anyone.
00:57 Almost there.
00:59 Okay, that's not the end of it.
01:06 I'm literally not shaking at all anymore.
01:09 I think it's one of those things where you hype yourself up that it's going to be so terrible.
01:15 Normally, there's tons of kids outside.
01:18 My neighbors are outside. My neighbors across the street are outside.
01:22 But I literally don't see anyone.
01:24 Am I just lucky right now?
01:26 I don't see anyone.
01:28 That was easy.
01:32 Now I feel silly.
01:38 Things have always been on my terms when it comes to showing people my birthmark.
01:42 I choose what video I want to post to TikTok.
01:45 I choose if I want to put makeup on before going and seeing someone or having someone over.
01:51 I choose where and when I want to show this part of myself to other people.
01:57 It's hard sometimes to control that.
02:00 If I'm in my pajamas and freshly showered and the doorbell rings, there's only so much you can control.
02:07 We're all self-conscious about something.
02:09 So when you are in control of the thing you are self-conscious about,
02:13 or if you're in control of any adjacent part, it feels better.
02:21 So I know I can put makeup on if I want.
02:24 I know I can put on a nice outfit to distract if I want.
02:28 I know I could have driven down there if I wanted to.
02:33 I can't control this.
02:35 I can control everything else or most of everything else.
02:42 Do scary things.
02:45 I'm not afraid of anything.
02:47 I'm not afraid of anything.
02:51 [END]
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