00:00 If you are in the midst of deconstructing or you have deconstructed, I'm sure you've had people say this to you,
00:07 and that's, "You were never real Christian." Or on my videos, I get a lot of comments of, "She was never real Christian or else she wouldn't have walked away."
00:16 And this is really hurtful and very annoying to people who are deconstructing because I was a real Christian, a real fundamentalist Christian.
00:26 I went on missions trips. I did VBS. I had a diary that I would write to Jesus. I read my Bible every day, prayed. I prayed the prayer. I lived out the prayer in my life.
00:40 I did communicants class. The elders and pastor of my church literally said, "Okay, this girl is saved. That's how I can take communion."
00:49 They had to approve me, and I was approved. Oh my gosh. And it's so, so ignorant and so rude of people to say that, but I was thinking about it.
01:01 And the reason that they're saying this is because they're scared. I remember being in that place, and I remember someone very close to me deconstructed,
01:11 and they were so in it. They were working for a missions organization, and their whole life was surrounded on Jesus and God, and then they walked away, and it was terrifying.
01:21 And the only way to make your life viewpoint work is to say that they were never a Christian because Christians don't believe that you can be unsaved.
01:32 And it's terrifying because that's the only crutch they have. And so when people comment that I was never a real Christian, or when people have told me in my life that I was never a real Christian,
01:45 I just, I do still get annoyed and angry because it's annoying, but I just feel pity for them because they're coming from a really scared, terrifying place, and they don't want that to happen to them.
01:56 And so their crutch is that they're doing it right, you were doing it wrong, you were just fooling yourself.
02:02 Yeah, it's sad. It's really sad what that religion does to people and makes them scared that they have to attack others.
02:12 Just live your life.
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