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  • 2 years ago
An out-of-work former pitcher who never made it to the Bigs convinces his best friend to take their teenage sons on an outlandish cross-country road trip to get the boys recruited by a top-tier college baseball team.
Transcript
00:00 I can bring two people to the showcase.
00:03 I choose a picture with dreamy blue eyes and pretty boy catch.
00:07 Yes!
00:08 I'm a pretty boy dad.
00:11 This is a big deal.
00:12 This is the best program in the country.
00:15 We can't afford not to send Joe.
00:18 How much fun would it be to do an old fashioned father-son road trip, huh?
00:22 I wouldn't trust my husband on an all guys road trip.
00:26 Well grime you little dog.
00:28 He looks friendly.
00:29 I haven't seen anyone looking for Matterhorn.
00:31 You named her Matterhorn?
00:32 Matterhorn!
00:33 Hey Francis, have a sea-soon!
00:35 You put down the knife!
00:37 I'm not well!
00:38 You slept with twelve women?
00:40 Who told you we were all women?
00:42 You know, you two never told me about your new business.
00:44 We're making pornos in our bedroom.
00:46 And not even good ones.
00:48 While you live out your unfulfilled dreams, you're our son.
00:51 It would be nice to make a living off my culinary degree.
00:54 I've got a great feeling about you, Simone.
00:56 Hold on to my number.
00:57 Wow.
00:58 Whatever it takes.
01:00 That host is hot.
01:01 Maybe he'll take you down under.
01:03 You're useless!
01:04 Like a limp dick!
01:07 Limp dick?
01:08 Wake up, Dad.
01:09 I'm not a limp dick!
01:11 I'll pretend I did not hear that.
01:13 Maybe he can close when it counts.
01:16 I promise I will be back in time for your fourteenth birthday.
01:19 Fifteenth birthday!
01:21 I'm sorry, honey.
01:22 I'm driving across the country.
01:24 Spending money I don't have.
01:27 You've got exactly four days to make it back in one piece.
01:30 [HORN HONKING]
01:32 [LAUGHTER]
01:34 Hey.
01:35 Ha ha.
01:36 Nice.
01:37 All right.
01:38 What do you say we check out the house, boys?
01:40 [LAUGHTER]
01:42 [MUSIC PLAYING]
01:44 (glass shattering)

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