- 4/30/2015
“The Mamaluke” is a single camera situation comedy about a
bumbling but likable guy named Lou, who tries to make his friends
and neighbors believe he’s a mafioso. But, in reality, he’s merely a
schlep down at the local social club frequented by the real
wiseguys. And, with his sharp-witted, sardonic wife, Marie, two
grown kids and a wacky live-in mother-in-law who constantly
remind him that he’s not ‘Don Corleone’, it’s the perfect recipe for
an original, fresh and enjoyable TV series concept!
In episode #2, “A Bump in the Road”, Lou accidentally runs over the Boss’beloved cat, ‘Gabagool’, and is certain that he will be whacked for the mishap.And in episode #3, “You Dirty Rat!”, Lou strongly suspectsthat Grandma’s new boyfriend isn’t quite who he claims tobe—a rival mob boss perhaps?
Directed By: Mark Riccardi
Writer: Ben Fiore
Stars: Johnny Williams, Veronica Alicino, Nicole Cinaglia
bumbling but likable guy named Lou, who tries to make his friends
and neighbors believe he’s a mafioso. But, in reality, he’s merely a
schlep down at the local social club frequented by the real
wiseguys. And, with his sharp-witted, sardonic wife, Marie, two
grown kids and a wacky live-in mother-in-law who constantly
remind him that he’s not ‘Don Corleone’, it’s the perfect recipe for
an original, fresh and enjoyable TV series concept!
In episode #2, “A Bump in the Road”, Lou accidentally runs over the Boss’beloved cat, ‘Gabagool’, and is certain that he will be whacked for the mishap.And in episode #3, “You Dirty Rat!”, Lou strongly suspectsthat Grandma’s new boyfriend isn’t quite who he claims tobe—a rival mob boss perhaps?
Directed By: Mark Riccardi
Writer: Ben Fiore
Stars: Johnny Williams, Veronica Alicino, Nicole Cinaglia
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00♪♪
00:10♪♪
00:20♪♪
00:30♪♪
00:40♪♪
00:50♪♪
01:00Whoa, did you remember the bread?
01:03♪♪
01:11♪♪
01:21♪♪
01:31♪♪
01:41♪♪
01:51♪♪
02:01♪♪
02:11♪♪
02:21♪♪
02:31♪♪
02:41♪♪
02:51♪♪
03:01♪♪
03:11♪♪
03:21♪♪
03:31♪♪
03:41♪♪
03:51♪♪
04:01♪♪
04:11♪♪
04:21♪♪
04:31♪♪
04:41♪♪
04:51♪♪
05:02Here, senor.
05:05Here, split that.
05:07And next time, move faster like I'm an INS agent or something.
05:12Am I supposed to buy tacos with this?
05:14Do whatever you want with it.
05:16Open the door. Open the door.
05:19♪♪
05:29You put the cat shit in the back?
05:31Oh, yeah.
05:32Oh, oh.
05:34♪♪
05:42What the hell was that?
05:44Maybe you're on the curb?
05:46♪♪
05:56♪♪
06:01Capagou!
06:04I'm a dead man!
06:06Get Capagou! Hurry up!
06:08I'm a dead man.
06:10I'm dead. I'm dead.
06:13It's over.
06:19How did I do that?
06:21How did I do that?
06:23♪♪
06:25Stay with the car!
06:27♪♪
06:32I need help.
06:33I hit this car with my cat.
06:34I mean, I hit this cat with my car.
06:36Name?
06:37Capagou.
06:38Your name is Capagou?
06:40No, it's slow.
06:42And you're the owner?
06:44And do you need to know that?
06:46No, I just like to pass the time asking questions I don't need to know.
06:50Yeah, I'm the owner.
06:51Spell the last name, please.
06:53Look, miss, I got a half-dead cat here.
06:55You're wasting my time trying to get to know me.
06:57Do you not know the spelling of your last name?
06:59Oh, I thought you people were supposed to be nice and all.
07:02To the animals.
07:03Fill this out.
07:04Lady, please.
07:07You don't understand.
07:08If this cat dies, I die.
07:10I need to see a friggin' doctor right away.
07:13Someone will be with you shortly.
07:15Shortly?
07:16This cat is on his ninth and a half life.
07:19Sir, have a seat.
07:21The doctor will soon return from lunch.
07:23Lunch?
07:24You mean you only have one doctor here?
07:26Yes, but he's a very good one.
07:32Here, take care of my cat.
07:34All right.
07:35Make sure she's tip-top shape in less than an hour.
07:39Come back this way.
07:40We'll see what I can do.
07:42He's going to have to bring your ass back from the dead
07:44if you keep messing with me.
07:47Whoa, be careful, Doc.
07:49Mmm.
07:50Mmm.
07:51Bad?
07:52Mmm.
07:53Bad, Doc?
07:54No.
07:55Her pupils are dilated.
07:56She's blind?
07:57Don't tell me she's blind.
07:58She's very listless.
08:00Listless?
08:01What does that mean?
08:02Very blah.
08:03Blah?
08:04I hit this little cat with a big car.
08:05Blah.
08:06She's not going to be happy.
08:07How old is she?
08:08What do I know?
08:0935, 36.
08:11A cat's life expectancy is between 10 and 15 years.
08:14What can I tell you, Doc?
08:15She ate well.
08:16She got plenty of love exercise.
08:17Yeah, yeah.
08:18When you hit the cat, did it reflect off the car?
08:20For the love of God, Doc, under.
08:23Underneath?
08:25Underneath bed?
08:26Doc, don't tell me she's going to die.
08:27Don't tell me she's going to die.
08:29I'm going to have to keep her and run a battery of tests.
08:33I'll get back to you.
08:35Whatever.
08:38It is not going to be cheap.
08:41Is there anything I can get you?
08:42Yeah.
08:44A priest to read me my last rites.
09:00Excuse me, fellas.
09:01I...
09:02Hey, Martha Stewart.
09:04I got a hemorrhoid the size of a golf ball in my ass.
09:07Think you can fix that?
09:09I don't think she would.
09:11Boss.
09:13Your car is all ready.
09:15Shined up just the way you like it.
09:17This looks like a bad time.
09:19I'll get going.
09:20Wait a minute.
09:22Sit down.
09:28Cabagool is missing.
09:30Missing?
09:31What did I say?
09:32He said missing.
09:33Like not here.
09:34God.
09:35Got it?
09:36Maybe he ran away.
09:38Cabagool would never run away.
09:40Boss.
09:41I hear cats run away all the time.
09:43He would never run away.
09:45You know why?
09:47Because you feed him, boss.
09:49Because he likes you?
09:50Not likes.
09:52Loves.
09:53He loves me, and I love him.
09:56Which means someone took him.
10:00That's right.
10:02And when we find the person that took my Cabagool,
10:08well, let's just leave it to the imagination.
10:11Just like the song.
10:14You keep your eyes and ears open, shoeman.
10:18Eyes and ears open.
10:21Sure thing.
10:23I'll get going.
10:33Marie.
10:35They're going to whack me, Marie.
10:37They're going to whack me.
10:38Whoa, whoa, whoa.
10:39Slow down, Lou.
10:40What do you mean they're going to whack you?
10:41Who's going to whack you?
10:42Vito, the boys.
10:43I killed, I mean, not dead yet.
10:46I ran over Cabagool.
10:47Wait.
10:48You killed someone and you didn't tell me?
10:50Good.
10:51Maybe you'll get a real husband now.
10:53No, no.
10:54Vito's cat.
10:55He's not dead, but I brought him to the front door.
11:00He's not dead, but I brought him to the front.
11:02They're going to kill me.
11:04Lou, calm down.
11:05I'm sure you're just overreacting.
11:07Maybe, but, oh, Marie.
11:10Marie, I can't take the stress.
11:12My heart can't take the stress.
11:14Well, whatever gets you out first.
11:16Oh, please.
11:17Doesn't she have a bingo game to go to or a judge to bring down?
11:20Listen, Lou, it's a cat, not a family member.
11:23Oh, no, no, Marie.
11:25You don't understand.
11:26You didn't see this Vito with this cat.
11:28He's almost shot with this cat.
11:31Uh-oh.
11:32Marie, I got to go.
11:33I think I was spotted.
11:34What?
11:35Someone saw you?
11:36Yeah.
11:37Yeah.
11:38I got to go.
11:39I'll call you back, Marie.
11:40Lou?
11:41Feel like Chinese on the Lou?
11:42Yeah.
11:43Lou, are you still there?
11:44Yeah, yeah, I got to go.
11:48Hey, get the door.
11:54They're closed, old man.
11:56They closed?
11:57That's right.
11:58And if you don't start talking, you're going to be closed for good.
12:00Good?
12:01We think this is a joke.
12:02No joke.
12:03He'll break you in two like a chopstick.
12:05Ah, chopstick.
12:07Chopstick, chopstick.
12:11What the hell?
12:12You know, these are not bad.
12:14I like these.
12:15Hey, don't sidetrack us.
12:16Order food.
12:17Order food.
12:18Don't play dumb.
12:19We know you know about the cat.
12:20Yeah, cat.
12:21C-A-T.
12:22Cat.
12:23Cat.
12:24Cat?
12:25No, no.
12:26No cat.
12:27You get this, my Asian-American friend.
12:30We know you think you know what you saw.
12:33But you didn't see nothing, you hear?
12:37Now get me an egg roll.
12:38Ah, egg roll.
12:39Egg roll.
12:40Egg roll.
12:41Egg roll.
12:42Egg roll.
12:43Egg roll.
12:47Not bad, not bad.
12:48Come on, Eddie, make it to go.
12:57I know you and I, we don't really speak much,
13:00but you've got to help me out on here.
13:02I mean, you, being who you are,
13:05and probably know everything that you know,
13:10realize I can't stand cats.
13:13But it was an accident.
13:14You've got to understand.
13:16I'm on pins and needles.
13:18I mean, I'm here all day.
13:20The vet still hasn't called me.
13:22You've got to help me out on this one, please.
13:25I like my life.
13:26I don't want to die yet.
13:31You know, you've got a nice place here.
13:34Oh, shh.
13:36Oh.
13:37No offense.
13:40Hello.
13:41Mr.
13:43Mama Luke, who's this?
13:44This is Happy Pets calling.
13:46Oh, oh, Doc.
13:48Jesus.
13:50Sorry.
13:51Oh, Doc.
13:52I've been waiting.
13:53I've been waiting.
13:54I'm on pins and needles all day.
13:56What's going on?
14:08Buried.
14:11In the woods.
14:13Right next to me.
14:14Right next to me.
14:22I don't care what you have to do.
14:24You find that fat bastard.
14:27He killed my Caboogoo.
14:29Now I'm going to kill him.
14:32Marie!
14:34You have to answer the Caboogoo.
14:36No!
14:37Lights out, human!
14:39No!
14:40Yeah!
14:44Marie!
14:46Marie!
14:47I told you not to eat that pasta before bed.
14:50Now look at you.
14:51You're sleeping your whole life away.
15:03You know, Pop, I've been thinking.
15:05With you dead and all,
15:07I'm going to have to get a job.
15:09Wouldn't that be a tragedy?
15:11It can't be the two jobs that you do best.
15:14Daddy, do you have life insurance?
15:16All right, you two, stop.
15:17The only thing killing your father is eating that pasta all day.
15:21Don't matter.
15:22Nothing matters anymore.
15:23Don't you have to go down to the funeral home?
15:26Yeah, I get there quick enough one way or another.
15:28Well, why don't you try getting up and moving around a little?
15:31Or are you practicing for our next date night?
15:35If we're doing that, I won't need you here.
15:37Very funny, Lou.
15:38Very funny.
15:40Just relax.
15:41Nobody's trying to whack you.
15:45Lou!
15:46You got sent for.
15:48Time to go.
15:54Who's overreacting now?
16:00There you go, boss.
16:08You look pale. Do you feel all right?
16:10Absolutely not.
16:11Not well.
16:13I've been struggling with diarrhea the past few days.
16:15You look a little wheezy.
16:18Boss, listen.
16:21I got something I got to tell you.
16:23Really, Ray?
16:24I got to tell you something.
16:25I want to tell you something.
16:27I truly love Kapa'u and I love my mama.
16:32But Kapa'u was my mother.
16:35It's very hard to let go of someone you love.
16:41But let's face it.
16:44Kapa'u was nothing but a cat.
16:47And now that she's gone, I feel good.
16:50I don't sneeze, no itchy eyes, and I don't need this.
16:55I was allergic to the cat.
16:58I didn't even know it.
16:59Ain't that something?
17:02I wanted you to come down here
17:06and tell you that you've been relieved of shitbox duty.
17:10Really?
17:14Here.
17:15Take your wife out to dinner.
17:17You did good.
17:18Now get the hell out of here.
17:20Thank you, boss.
17:25Best day of my life.
17:33I think I need some help.
17:43Lou!
17:44Oh my God.
17:45Marie, Marie, Marie, Marie.
17:47Life is good.
17:48Life is great.
17:50There's the man I love.
17:52Where?
17:53You hungry?
17:54You have to ask.
17:57Gina, my baby.
18:00I got good news.
18:01The whole family's going out this weekend on me.
18:04Champagne to work.
18:05Really?
18:06Follow me, my son, my son, my son.
18:09Follow me.
18:10Buddy, buddy.
18:12So, I see you didn't die.
18:14Me?
18:15Die?
18:16Listen, don't let me have to go over time.
18:17Oh, you're taking it easy.
18:18Oh!
18:19What the hell was that?
18:20Oh, I meant to tell you, Lou.
18:22They called from the vets.
18:23There was a mix-up between a gabagool and a hamster.
18:26They said they felt awful, so they dropped him off over here.
18:29Looks like we're going to have a new seat at the table from now on, huh?
18:32Marie, Marie!
18:34Ah!
18:35Oh!
19:00Oh!
19:01Oh!
19:02Oh!
19:03Oh!
19:04Oh!
19:05Oh!
19:06Oh!
19:07Oh!
19:08Oh!
19:09Oh!
19:10Oh!
19:11Oh!
19:12Oh!
19:13Oh!
19:14Oh!
19:15Oh!
19:16Oh!
19:17Oh!
19:18Oh!
19:19Oh!
19:20Oh!
19:21Oh!
19:22Oh!
19:23Oh!
19:24Oh!
19:25Oh!
19:26Oh!
19:27Oh!
19:28Oh!
19:29Oh!
19:30Oh!
19:31Oh!
19:32Oh!
19:33Oh!
19:34Oh!
19:35Oh!
19:36Oh!
19:37Oh!
19:38Oh!
19:39Oh!
19:40Oh!
19:41Oh!
19:42Oh!
19:43Oh!
19:44Oh!
19:45Oh!
19:46Oh!
19:47Oh!
19:48Oh!
19:49Oh!
19:50Oh!
19:51Oh!
19:52Oh!
19:53Oh!
19:54Oh!
19:55Oh!
19:56Oh!
19:58God!
19:59Hallelujah!
20:08Marie!!
20:11Even this cat's got to go!
20:13Oh I got to go!
20:15Ugh!
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