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  • 2 hours ago
A scientist who lives in a faraway island wants to abduct a number of Iranian intellectuals to try some of his experiments on them. Trying to manipulate the navigation system of an airplane carrying the intellectuals, he manipulates another plane by mistake. Now he has to take care of a bunch of odd people with unusual behaviors.
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00:00You must feel cold, huh?
00:02Extremely.
00:04Is this French?
00:05Yes, it's a first-class French coffee.
00:09Excuse me, how did you find something like that out here?
00:12Well, excuse me, but this place isn't as isolated as you might think it is.
00:18The desert is all covered in a thick fog.
00:20Oh my God, that piece of poetry sounds very familiar to me.
00:23So how exactly did you manage to find this place then?
00:27Listen to me. They say that when you earn something with blood, sweat and tears,
00:33no matter where you lose it, it will finally get back to you.
00:36Oh, very deep.
00:37You know, ma'am, since I've never done anything wrong in my entire life,
00:41God designed my destiny.
00:43Anywhere that this plane would come and crash right in the middle of my father's land,
00:46I mean, by God, who would have thought that?
00:49Yes, who would have thought it?
00:51This is a remote and uninhabited island.
00:54And it's not connected to any village or land at all, you see.
00:57So tell me then, my oh-so-wise friend, how is that your personal property?
01:05Well, my old friend, you can believe anything you want to.
01:10I don't really care.
01:13You see, I remember vividly that before my father died,
01:16he decided to give all of this land here to me.
01:20But he never.
01:21Please finish that sentence.
01:22But he never got the chance to bring me here and show this place to me.
01:26I've wanted to come here and see this place since I was a child.
01:29You know, I would even dream a similar place constantly.
01:32But, you know, God will always help honest people.
01:36That is how it has always been, you know.
01:39Yes.
01:40That plane.
01:42That plane crashed on this island here and made it my...
01:45It made it my child to dream to come true at last.
01:48Um, so do you have any evidence with you to prove your claim to this land here?
01:56Evidence?
01:57Hmm.
01:57Well, of course.
02:00Incidentally, I have one right here.
02:02Ah, hold on a second.
02:05Ah-ha.
02:07Ah, here.
02:08Here it is.
02:10There you go.
02:11This is it.
02:12A machete?
02:13Nice to meet you.
02:15This machete here is the same machete that belonged to my ancestors.
02:19The one that my father used to take back what was rightfully his from those cruel landowners who wanted to
02:23steal it from him.
02:24You see the blood there?
02:26Look at the blood.
02:27Look at the trail of blood that...
02:28Look at the clot there.
02:30Just look at it.
02:31It's beautiful, is it not?
02:36This is their blood, you see.
02:38The blood of those landowners.
02:41Huh?
02:42Um, can I...
02:43Can I ask you some questions just to satisfy my curiosity?
02:46Of course.
02:47Um, well then, who should I ask?
02:50Ask me.
02:51Excuse me, my friend.
02:52So do you know how far this island is from France, then?
02:56I don't know.
02:57Next question.
02:58Which continent are we in?
02:59I don't know.
03:00Next question.
03:01What's the name of this place?
03:02It doesn't have a name.
03:03We wanted to make sure that the baby was healthy first and then choose a name for it, you know?
03:07Oh, so it's healthy now.
03:08Yes, it is.
03:09It is taken after its mom.
03:10It's very beautiful and got rosy cheeks and healthy.
03:13Excuse me, sir.
03:14I have a question for you.
03:16Can you tell me what ocean we're close to?
03:18Let's suppose that it's the...
03:20Pacific.
03:22Hmm.
03:22Pacific.
03:23Pacific.
03:24Well, that's a really beautiful name.
03:26Guys, guys, he's absolutely right.
03:28I agree with you.
03:29The only person here that knows which ocean we're close to is this guy, I reckon.
03:34Despite the fact that you look like a complete crook.
03:37But I really liked what you said, man.
03:40I did.
03:43So, your thoughts?
03:45Do you all agree to my terms, then?
03:47You know, Mr. Meshit, I believed you the moment that I saw you.
03:50You know what?
03:51These guys are a little nosy about you.
03:52Sometimes a field research is necessary for people to believe in something.
03:56You know I knew from the beginning.
03:57I would like to apologize to everyone.
03:59Being nosy is in human nature.
04:02I also wanted to tell you something else.
04:06Unfortunately, there's no cellular reception.
04:10No reception at all.
04:12Well, now I can say that this place is 100% his property.
04:17You know this place is like the back of your hand, don't you, sir?
04:23Hey, wait!
04:24Where do you think you're going, huh?
04:25Hold on, hold on, let me help you.
04:26Is something wrong?
04:29Hey!
04:30I said, where do you think you're going?
04:34Is something wrong?
04:38Wait, wait!
04:42Something hit me in the head.
04:43That's what I remember.
04:45Something heavy hit me in the head.
04:46Are you sure?
04:53Hello, Mother!
04:55RF?
04:56RF, something heavy hit me on the head just now.
04:58Oh, you're going to have in your head.
04:59Something hit me right on the head.
05:00Your head is going to be fine, don't worry, buddy.
05:02What do you mean?
05:04What do you mean?
05:04Oh, I was thinking.
05:05What do you expect me to be?
05:06Why is nobody listening to me, huh?
05:07Come on, don't get close to me.
05:09I didn't get close to me, man.
05:11What?
05:12What?
05:13Oh, my God.
05:14What are you talking about?
05:14Who is supposed to eat me?
05:16I'm talking about Honey Malecta and his cannibal friends.
05:19There are no humans yet to begin with, let alone actual cannibals, yes?
05:22If there were any cannibals here, they'd starve to death.
05:25As I've realised, there have been some people on this island before us
05:28who, apparently, have had a very good time here today.
05:31No, no, no, that can't be true.
05:33This place belongs to one of our friends here.
05:35Which friend?
05:36Um, it belongs to Mr. Machete there.
05:39Thank you, sir.
05:39Karosh is right.
05:40He's one of our closest friends.
05:43Why haven't you ever talked about him before?
05:45Well, his name has never been brought up in a conversation.
05:47I don't believe you.
05:49Then how come we didn't see him in our wedding ceremony?
05:51Well, um, you know, that's because he used to live abroad, son.
05:55Ah, what about outside of our wedding?
05:58I've told you a million times, the length of a friendship is not important,
06:02but the quality is.
06:03Ah.
06:05But this place is totally uninhabited.
06:07I'm sorry, but what do you mean this is an uninhabited place?
06:09This area is only a little different from the other places.
06:12It's different in vegetation and landscaping.
06:14It's a little roughed up if you pay attention to detail, you see?
06:17Ladies and gentlemen, please listen.
06:19As I remember, my deceased father always used to tell me
06:23that there was a cabin at the end of this island.
06:25It has a very beautiful arch.
06:27It belonged to my dear aunt, my lovely aunt.
06:30There's another cabin right behind you.
06:33That one belonged to my grandfather.
06:35There are two other cabins which we are supposed to turn into a restaurant.
06:38Do you understand that?
06:39A sophisticated restaurant which later on the children of the family
06:42could come here and turn into a chain restaurant
06:44and then support their own families,
06:45but my father didn't live to make any of that come true.
06:49Well, God bless him then.
06:51Thank you very much.
06:52There's another one.
06:54On that side too.
06:56That's the one, you know.
06:57I was supposed to live in that one myself, but...
06:59Why are you lying to everyone again?
07:01What are you talking about?
07:03Darling, are you feeling better?
07:05Are you talking to me?
07:06Did something hit you in the head?
07:07Your eyes are red, darling.
07:09Are red?
07:10Yes, dear.
07:12I've told you before that this lady is my wife
07:15and as of today, my fellow citizens,
07:17she is the first lady of this island.
07:20Oh, my God.
07:21Are you really going to be the first lady of this entire island?
07:24Yes, of course, my dear.
07:25Do you have a tiara as well?
07:27No, no, I have a hat.
07:28I'll get her a tiara later.
07:29That's enough.
07:30Listen to me.
07:31That woman is a criminal.
07:33But why?
07:34There's no why.
07:34You and that fool are the ones who put us in this mess.
07:37Hold on a second.
07:38What do you mean?
07:39I'm talking about the person who pointed a gun at us
07:41together with this woman on the plate.
07:42God bless his soul.
07:44I think he's been eaten by wild animals.
07:46That's right.
07:47We left him in the middle of the jungle to die
07:48and don't look at me like that.
07:50It's those people's fault
07:50that we are in this mess of a situation right now.
07:52He's absolutely right.
07:54This woman is guilty and she should be punished.
07:55She should be punished behind closed doors.
07:57That's what I think should be done.
08:00What?
08:00Me?
08:01Help me.
08:02Rev, help me.
08:03I'll take care of it in a second.
08:04Hold on now.
08:05Now pay attention.
08:07Anybody who is even remotely related to me
08:10and anyone who depends on me even slightly
08:12cannot and will not do anything wrong,
08:14he would be absolutely right.
08:17Do you understand?
08:18Besides, do you know that?
08:20Because of your short stay in these cabins,
08:22you've cost me a lot of money, my friends.
08:24Yes.
08:24And you have caused a lot of damage.
08:26Do you realize that?
08:27Damage?
08:28We haven't touched anything to cause any damage.
08:31I agree.
08:31Huh?
08:32We haven't touched anything to cause any damage, man.
08:36Listen.
08:37This right here is a tourist island, my friend.
08:40I'm sure that you're not aware that the cost of staying here for one night
08:43can be more expensive than staying in a hotel in South Africa.
08:45You don't know that,
08:46but I can't blame you for not knowing what you have any idea of, my friend.
08:50You do not know what kind of a person I am.
08:52I'm a kind of person.
08:54All of us should get along like family.
08:57That being said,
08:58I'm not going to charge you for your stay here.
09:00I'm willing to forget about the cost of your stay here,
09:02even though the bill's rather massive,
09:04provided that you forget about any wrongdoing or mistakes
09:07that the First Lady might have made.
09:08I'm not implying that she's done anything wrong.
09:10No, thank you very much, darling.
09:12Although I will have to mention
09:13that the situation's going to change from this second on right now, okay?
09:17Being friends with you all and everything is fine,
09:19but business is business
09:20and I can't let my affection get in the way of family legacy.
09:22This change is effective from this second
09:24and you'll be charged right away.
09:26Meaning?
09:27Well, what I mean is
09:28that you can find anything for your comfort here.
09:31It has all the living necessities you need.
09:33If you want to sleep, you can.
09:35Go over there and lie down.
09:37If you want hot water,
09:38you can have a drinking water as well.
09:40We have a shopping mall as well here, of course.
09:41Do you really have a shopping mall?
09:42It wasn't a joke.
09:43Oh, that's great.
09:45Well, I can feel that everyone here is ready to start with the auction.
09:48Are you ready? Okay.
09:50So let's start the bidding, shall we?
09:52The first cabin is my aunt's cabin,
09:54my dear aunt's cabin.
09:56So it's right over there
09:57and you can trust me here,
09:58it has everything you need.
09:59It has a fireplace,
10:00a mosquito net,
10:01an AC unit,
10:02it's sunny and bright
10:03and when you open the windows,
10:04you have a pretty view
10:05and that's a bargain
10:06at 150 big ones.
10:07So then,
10:08who is the first bidder?
10:09We want it, sir!
10:09We want it!
10:10What are you talking about?
10:11That is so expensive, man!
10:12Huh?
10:14Excuse me, Mr. Machete,
10:17can you tell me what good
10:18any money is on this island here?
10:21You know what, sir?
10:22I didn't expect that
10:23from an educated person like yourself.
10:25So what you're saying is,
10:26you're planning to stay on this beautiful island
10:28until the very end of your life, sir?
10:30Did I understand that correctly?
10:32Excuse me?
10:33Do you accept any other currencies?
10:35Well, of course, my friend.
10:36Do you have euros?
10:38No.
10:38Tell me when you do.
10:40But what exchange rate are you using?
10:43The same exchange rate
10:44that you got before the trip?
10:47Excuse me,
10:48we got our dollars
10:48based on the 1.27 exchange rate, though.
10:51That's all right.
10:51I'll accept that, yes.
10:52Excuse me,
10:53now that I think about it,
10:54I'd exchanged a part of it, though,
10:55based on 1.24.
10:57That's all right, too.
10:58Thank you very much.
10:59By the way, excuse me,
11:01we have about $1,000
11:02from a long time ago.
11:03It's my mother's.
11:04We'll accept that as well.
11:05All right, then.
11:06Ah, for those of you
11:08who've lost everything
11:09that in flight
11:10they can't pay for expenses with cash,
11:12there's another option.
11:13If you have any goods
11:14or any kind of jewellery
11:15or any valuable things with them,
11:17they can leave them with us
11:18as a down payment.
11:19The First Lady right here
11:20will take care of your problem for you.
11:22Do you understand?
11:24And one more thing, guys.
11:25Since the night here
11:26is only for one hour long,
11:28everything will be half price.
11:30I'm basically setting fire to the price.
11:33You should sit together
11:33and figure things out
11:34when you put all the money,
11:36the jewellery and gold
11:36in one place.
11:37I'll be right back.
11:38Talk things out, guys.
11:39You know we should hurry up
11:40and get to the cabin
11:40as soon as possible.
11:41We have to get to it, please.
11:43Get over here.
12:06Payman.
12:08Payman.
12:10Payman.
12:22I told you that I didn't want to take this damn trip.
12:25But you insisted that I must come.
12:28I told you that it was your honeymoon
12:31and I shouldn't bother you.
12:32But again, you insisted that if I didn't come,
12:35you wouldn't have any fun.
12:36I told you that I'd recently bought a house
12:39and I didn't have any money.
12:40But you insisted that I was your guest
12:42and I didn't have to pay anything.
12:45You kept insisting and insisting
12:47and insisting again.
12:50Are you happy?
12:52Huh?
12:52Are you happy, Payman?
12:54You feel proud now that you've brought us here
12:56and messed up our lives?
12:59This place has a serious problem, my friend.
13:03Do you know what it is?
13:08Do you know what it is?
13:09I doubt you know, though.
13:12It's really obvious that you don't.
13:14But, well, I'm so naive to think otherwise.
13:17Yes, I am.
13:30What the hell is this?
13:32What's up with that tacky sign?
13:37We wish you a joyful stay.
13:39This is so dumb.
13:42The movie must have been quite dull
13:43if you passed out in front of it.
13:45When did you wake up?
13:46Did you sleep at all?
13:47No, I did not.
13:48It was so cold here
13:50that I couldn't sleep for one second.
13:51I didn't sleep either.
13:53Although it wasn't because of the cold,
13:54it was because of the sense of responsibility.
13:56I was looking for that guy until morning,
13:58but I couldn't find him at all.
14:00Found a couple of footprints,
14:01but I promise that I'll find him
14:02and I'll deliver him to you.
14:03Oh, my goodness.
14:05It seems that you have a very sensitive kidney
14:07and a sensitive personality as well.
14:10So it seems that you're familiar
14:11with the jig idiom, aren't you?
14:13No.
14:19Hey, man.
14:20What is it?
14:21Hey, man.
14:22What is it?
14:23Hey, man.
14:24What is it?
14:25Hey, are you crazy at what?
14:27Oh, my Lord, what is it?
14:29Breakfast.
14:30What did she say?
14:32Go get some breakfast, man.
14:33You know what?
14:34You're behaving in a way
14:35that seems like you're not aware
14:36of the situation that we're in.
14:37I don't understand.
14:38You know, there are a lot of people
14:39who don't understand this,
14:40so you can explain, please.
14:41I don't understand why you always bring that up, man.
14:44The situation doesn't have anything to do with breakfast.
14:46You know, when you wake up in the morning,
14:47you should have your breakfast.
14:48It doesn't matter what the situation is.
14:50Really?
14:51Come on, go ahead and talk to him.
14:55But you promised.
14:56You told me you were going to make me breakfast
14:58every morning we wake up together.
15:01Listen here, I know that I said those words, but...
15:03There are no buts, my friend, all right?
15:04You must keep your promises, man.
15:06The marriage that starts with buts and ifs
15:08and things like that is not going to end well
15:09for either of the parties.
15:10Well, you're saying an awful lot of ifs and buts,
15:12but right at the beginning of our marriage payment,
15:14you actually have the nerve to complain
15:16when I tell you I want to get a divorce from you.
15:17How can you justify that?
15:19You know what?
15:19Why do you always say this and embarrass me
15:21in front of this lowlight?
15:23Listen to me, my sweetheart.
15:25You can neither have breakfast,
15:26nor can you get a divorce from me here.
15:28End of story.