00:00Just a neighborly dick.
00:03Just a Pret-a-Mansha dick.
00:10Welcome to Woke Bay, the place that
00:12makes you feel like you're wearing an ascot and a fop watch
00:15when you're fapping to hella smart dudes.
00:18Hashtag McClassy.
00:19I'm your host, Phoebe Robinson, and with me today
00:22is a talented actress, writer, comedian.
00:26But y'all probably know her best as a daily show correspondent.
00:30Beachy Dubs, she's my favorite of them all.
00:32Please get up for my work wife, Jessica Renee Williams.
00:37Hi, everybody.
00:38Hi, Phoebe.
00:38Thank you for having me.
00:39Thank you for being here.
00:40It's so nice to see you.
00:41I like your outfit.
00:41I have to return it later.
00:44Anyway, tell us three fun facts about yourself
00:47that people might not know.
00:48Might not know.
00:50Six foot tall.
00:51I like breakfast for dinner.
00:54And totally fapped before I got here.
00:56Wicca, wicca.
00:57Here's the deal, ladies and gents.
01:00This is how this show works.
01:01Each week, myself and a lovely co-host like Jess over here,
01:05we're going to celebrate a famous dude for being super hot,
01:09super smart, and affecting positive change in the world.
01:13Here's the name, Woke Bay.
01:15We're talking about a dude so hot and so woke
01:18that the thought of his smart peen makes our vagines feel like
01:22they graduated cum laude from Yale.
01:25By cum laude, you know what I mean?
01:27Like cum laude.
01:28No, yeah, we got it.
01:29No, I'm talking about sex, y'all.
01:31Guys, we're talking about a guy so woke about race issues in America
01:35that he makes you just want to put baby powder all up in your wingtips
01:39so you can go marching with him.
01:40Yeah, we're talking about a dude so woke that he makes you want to put baby powder
01:44under your left and right tata so that you can go outside and survive the summer heat.
01:48And if you don't have big boobs, you have a 32A, you just walk straight out the door.
01:53So who could we be talking about?
01:57Jessi Williams!
02:04So first of all, while many celebrities stay mom on the issue of police brutality,
02:08especially in regards to African American women,
02:10the man posted a 24 tweet diatribe regarding Sandra Bland's infamous traffic stop.
02:15Not only is he unafraid to speak out about issues,
02:19he's also aligning himself with movements such as Black Lives Matter.
02:22He's the youngest and sexiest member of the board of directors for the Advancement Project,
02:27a think tank and advocacy group.
02:28And he's the executive producer of Question Bridge Black Males,
02:32a multi-layered media project that focuses on Black male identity.
02:36Okay, fine, Jess. Let's go back to Mr. Williams Williams.
02:40They said that Jessi Williams and Jessica Williams could not make a baby.
02:44But boy, was it a beautiful baby. It was. It really was.
02:50You want to know something else?
02:52What?
02:53You want to know something else?
02:54Mm-hmm.
02:55Do you really want to know something else?
02:56Uh, sure.
02:57Back in the day before all the fame and the Grey's Anatomy came,
03:00he was an African American studies teacher.
03:03Ooh, my leg, it got warm.
03:05Damn.
03:05Love is real.
03:05So, in honor of Jessi Williams bringing awareness to systematic racism in America,
03:11we are awarding him the first ever title of Woke Bay.
03:16And without further ado, Jessica is going to say her vows to you, Jessi,
03:19for your future wedding.
03:21Oh, my gosh.
03:22Wow. Um, oh, I wasn't prepared for this.
03:26Oh.
03:28Oh, wow.
03:29You're... wow.
03:31Hey, Jessi, it's me, your wife, Jessica.
03:36I promise to commit to you, and I promise to allow you to cook for me.
03:43I promise to allow you to watch our children, our beautiful, sexy children.
03:48I promise to allow you to set up a TV for me and clean and do fatherly duties around the
03:55house.
03:56I mostly promise to always be woke, just like you.
04:02Oh, my God, that was so...
04:05Oh, okay.
04:07Oh, that's Jessica Williams.
04:09Yeah, you don't need baby powder for these.
04:10No, and this is padding, so it's really...
04:13You can touch it without the bra if you want to.
04:15You don't want to.
04:16It's such thin material.
04:18Love you, mean it.
04:19Bye...
04:20Bye...
04:20Bye...
04:21Bye...
04:21Bye...
04:21You
