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00:00Growing up, my childhood friend Luke and my friend Sophie had given me plenty of nicknames.
00:04Piggy.
00:05Piggy?
00:06Chubby.
00:08Chubby.
00:10Butterball.
00:12They said those were the kinds of names only the people closest to you got to use.
00:16Once, Sophie called me Fatty.
00:17Fatty!
00:18In front of my coworkers while I was giving a quarterly presentation,
00:21the whole office burst out laughing.
00:23My director frowned at me and I finished the presentation with my face burning red.
00:27Luke ruffled my hair.
00:30She didn't mean anything by it.
00:31Don't take it personally.
00:33Then, as usual, he added.
00:36But you really should lose some weight.
00:38When clients see you looking like this.
00:40At a company retreat, Sophie imitated the way I stammered whenever I got nervous in front of clients.
00:44She mimicked me constantly, tugging down the hem of my blazer to hide my stomach.
00:48She even copied the squeak my chair made when I sat down.
00:51Luke laughed louder than anyone.
00:55Alright, stop. She's sensitive.
00:56Then he turned around and saved the video of Sophie mocking me to his Instagram highlights.
01:00Last week, at a client appreciation dinner, I closed a million dollar deal on my own for the first time.
01:05Sophie raised her glass.
01:07Wow, our fatty actually landed a deal?
01:10The client didn't just feel sorry for you, did they?
01:13The client's expression changed.
01:14After dinner, they told me they wanted to reconsider the partnership.
01:18The million dollar deal was gone.
01:20I sat in my car, wiping away tears when Luke knocked on the window and climbed in.
01:24He handed me a tissue.
01:27Stop crying.
01:28Next time, just make sure she doesn't drink so much.
01:31He paused.
01:32And don't start eating every time you're upset.
01:34The more you eat, the more-
01:35The fatter I get, I know!
01:36I finished the sentence for him.
01:38I dried my tears, opened my laptop, and submitted my resignation.
01:41Eight years.
01:42From high school until now, there had been a time when I wanted to keep walking beside them for much
01:46longer.
01:46I tossed the tissue back into Luke's lap, rolled up the window, and started the car.
01:50Dear fatty, congratulations.
01:52You finally learned how to leave on your own.
01:56Who approved your resignation?
01:58Luke's voice came through the phone, calm and casual,
02:00as if he were asking what I wanted for lunch.
02:02I wedged the phone between my shoulder and ear, while continuing to stuff clothes into my suitcase.
02:07HR, I followed the normal process.
02:09I told you not to do anything impulsive.
02:11Paused, then softened his voice.
02:13I'll talk to the client again about the deal.
02:14I've got some connections with the manager.
02:16I zipped up my suitcase and glanced at the plane ticket on the table.
02:19London.
02:19One way.
02:20Luke's, don't bother.
02:21What is this now?
02:22A trace of impatience finally entered his voice.
02:25You know, Sophie talks without thinking.
02:27It's not like this is news to you.
02:28Is it really worth all this?
02:29A million dollar deal.
02:30Three months of follow-ups.
02:3247 emails.
02:3311 revisions to the proposal.
02:35I'm not throwing a tantrum.
02:37I said calmly.
02:37I just want a change of scenery.
02:39What change of scenery?
02:40You barely passed your English proficiency exam.
02:41Where are you even going?
02:42I didn't answer.
02:43He sighed again.
02:44Familiar sigh.
02:45The one that said he was already used to putting up with me.
02:47Fine.
02:48Take a couple days to calm down.
02:50Sophie and I will take you out this weekend and we'll talk everything through.
02:52I won't be here this weekend.
02:54The other end went silent.
02:55What do you mean?
02:55My flight's the day after tomorrow.
02:57This time, the silence lasted longer.
02:58I heard him rummaging around for something.
03:00Where are you going?
03:01London.
03:02A friend's company is hiring.
03:03I'm gonna give it a shot.
03:04You-
03:04Sounded almost speechless.
03:05You're serious?
03:06I looked at myself in the mirror.
03:07My eyes were still swollen.
03:09My lips were cracked.
03:10And my face was puffy from crying.
03:12I looked dull and exhausted.
03:14I'm serious.
03:15Sarah.
03:16He suddenly said my full name, his voice dropping.
03:18Are you doing this to get back at me?
03:19I almost laughed.
03:21Eight years.
03:22And he still thought every decision I made came from some emotional impulse.
03:26No.
03:27Then tell me what's really going on.
03:28Why are you suddenly leaving?
03:30Why?
03:31Because you and Sophie turned me into a joke together.
03:33And you didn't even realize you were hurting me.
03:35Because every time I worked hard for something,
03:37Sophie could erase it with one careless sentence.
03:40And you would always stand beside her and say-
03:42She didn't mean it.
03:43Because I was finally tired.
03:44I just want to see somewhere new.
03:46By yourself?
03:47You can't even take the subway without going the wrong-
03:49I'm hanging up.
03:50I cut him off.
03:50I still have packing to do.
03:51Sarah.
03:52I ended the call.
03:53The second my screen went dark, a message from Sophie popped up.
03:56Sarah, I heard you're quitting?
03:57Are you kidding me?
03:58LOL.
03:59What are you even going to do without me and Luke?
04:00You probably won't even find clothes in your size by yourself in London.
04:02Ugh.
04:03Stop being dramatic.
04:05Come out this weekend.
04:06Dinner's on me, okay?
04:07My apology treat?
04:08I stared at the part about not finding clothes in my size for a long time.
04:11I didn't reply.
04:12I tossed my phone onto the bed and wheeled my suitcase into the living room.
04:15A hair clip Sophie had left behind the week before was still on the coffee table.
04:19A glittery little bow.
04:20That day, she had worn a size small dress that hung loose around her waist,
04:23while complaining that she'd gotten so fat lately.
04:25I picked up the clip, then I dropped it into the trash.
04:28The doorbell rang.
04:29When I opened the door, Sophie was standing there.
04:31She wore a cream-knit dress.
04:32Her hair styled in loose waves, with a bag of fruit in one hand.
04:35You're actually packing?
04:37Oh my god, Sarah, you're really leaving?
04:39Stepped aside and let her in.
04:40She put the fruit on the coffee table, then turned around.
04:43Her eyes were actually red.
04:44Is this because of what happened last time?
04:46I told you I was drunk.
04:49Sarah, you're not seriously leaving just because-
04:51Her voice faded.
04:52She lowered her head and twisted the hem of her dress between her fingers.
04:56What am I supposed to do if you leave?
04:59That was Sophie.
05:00She always knew exactly when to look vulnerable.
05:02She always knew how to make everyone think I was the one hurting her.
05:05This has nothing to do with you.
05:06I want to leave.
05:07She looked up at me with watery eyes.
05:09Really?
05:09You're not mad at me?
05:11No.
05:12Then can you stay?
05:13She grabbed my hand.
05:13Or at least wait until Luke gets back.
05:15He'll figure out a way to help you.
05:16Sophie-
05:16I pulled my hand free.
05:17My flight leaves at six the morning after tomorrow.
05:19She froze.
05:20Something flashed through those beautiful eyes.
05:23It disappeared too quickly for me to tell what it was.
05:25Then she smiled.
05:26Then I'll come see you off.
05:27You don't have to.
05:28I do.
05:29You're my best friend.
05:30My best friend.
05:31As she said those words, I remembered her calling me fatty in front of a client three months ago.
05:36I remembered the video of her imitating me tugging at my clothes being shared more than 200 times.
05:41And I remembered Luke laughing harder than anyone.
05:43Whatever.
05:44I said.
05:44She happily wrapped her arms around me.
05:46Sarah, don't forget me once you get there, okay?
05:48I said nothing.
05:49As she let go, my phone buzzed.
05:51A message from Luke.
05:52I don't agree.
05:53I looked at it for two seconds.
05:55Then I turned off my phone.
05:57After Sophie left, I kept packing.
05:59At the very back of a drawer, I found a metal box filled with little things I had collected over
06:04the past eight years.
06:05A birthday card Luke gave me during our sophomore year of high school.
06:08Happy birthday, Sarah.
06:09Hope you get braver every year.
06:11A friendship bracelet Sophie had made.
06:13Red cord with a tiny bead.
06:15The day she made it, she tried to slip it over my wrist.
06:17It dug into my skin, leaving a red mark.
06:19She gasped.
06:22Oops.
06:22Too tight.
06:24I'll make you another one after you lose some weight.
06:26So it stayed in that box for eight years.
06:28There were photos, too.
06:29Pictures of the three of us.
06:30I was always on the edge, unconsciously turning my body sideways,
06:33because I was afraid I took up too much space.
06:36And somehow, I was always the one smiling the hardest.
06:39I put the metal box on the highest shelf of my closet, somewhere I couldn't easily reach.
06:43I didn't take it with me, but I didn't throw it away either.
06:46At eleven that night, Luke called again.
06:47I didn't answer.
06:48He sent six messages.
06:49I didn't read them.
06:50The seventh was a voice message.
06:52I accidentally tapped it, and his voice filled the room.
06:56Sarah, you've hung up on me six times.
06:59Are you trying to start a fight?
07:00If you have something to say, say it.
07:02Don't give me this silent treatment crap.
07:05Silent treatment.
07:06I gave a bitter laugh.
07:07I turned off my phone.
07:08Then I slept better than I had in a long time.
07:12The next day was my last day before leaving.
07:15I went to the office to finish the paperwork for my resignation.
07:17My desk had already been cleared.
07:19There was a sticky note on my monitor from the co-worker who sat beside me.
07:22Good luck, Sarah.
07:23I peeled it off, tucked it into my pocket, and went to HR for the final signatures.
07:28When I stepped out of the elevator, I ran into Luke.
07:30He stood in the lobby in a perfectly tailored suit.
07:33One hand in his pocket.
07:34The expression on his face was complicated.
07:36What are you doing here?
07:38Picking you up.
07:41I don't need a ride.
07:42He stepped in front of me and looked down at me.
07:46Sarah, can you please talk to me like a normal person?
07:49I am.
07:50He frowned and raised his hand to touch my head, just like he had for the past eight years.
07:54Whenever he used to ruffle my hair, I stepped back.
07:57His hand froze in mid-air.
07:59You really are mad.
08:01He lowered it.
08:04I told you I'd talk to the manager again.
08:05The deal's gone.
08:06It's gone.
08:07I cut him off.
08:10Does that really mean you have to quit?
08:12Yes.
08:12He took a deep breath and switched to that gentle voice he always used on me.
08:17Sarah.
08:17Don't call me Sarah like that.
08:19He stopped.
08:19In eight years, I had never interrupted him like this.
08:22He was used to my easy-going temper.
08:24Used to me putting up with everything.
08:25Used to me nodding no matter what he said.
08:28Fine.
08:28He took a step back.
08:29Let's go somewhere and sit down.
08:31We'll talk.
08:32There's nothing to talk about.
08:34You're flying to London tomorrow, alone.
08:37Who do you even know there?
08:38You don't know your way around.
08:40I will.
08:44Sophie's been crying all day.
08:46She thinks you're leaving because of her.
08:47Oh, so?
08:48What do you mean, so?
08:50Now you won't even accept her apology?
08:52I looked at him.
08:53Luke, I asked calmly.
08:55Have you ever thought about something?
08:58What?
08:59If Sophie had been the one humiliated in front of that client, would you have said,
09:03just make sure Sarah doesn't drink so much next time?
09:04He froze.
09:06His mouth opened.
09:07Nothing came out.
09:07I walked around him and pushed open the lobby's glass doors.
09:11The sunlight outside was painfully bright.
09:13He followed me for two steps.
09:14Sarah, what time's your flight?
09:16I'll drive you.
09:18No.
09:19I didn't turn around.
09:20I'll drive you.
09:21I don't need you to anymore.
09:22The moment I walked out of the building, I let out a long breath.
09:25For the first time in eight years, the road ahead felt so short that I couldn't understand
09:30why it had taken me so long to walk it.
09:32When I got home, there was a bouquet on my coffee table.
09:35Sunflowers.
09:36My favorite.
09:36The card was in Sophie's handwriting.
09:38Sarah, I'm seeing you off tomorrow.
09:40No refusing.
09:41Promise you'll always be my best friend.
09:43I dropped the flowers into the trash beside the glittery bow clip.
09:48My alarm went off three times at four in the morning,
09:51before I finally dragged myself out of bed.
09:53By the time I washed up and wheeled my suitcase outside,
09:56the hallway was pitch black.
09:57The elevator doors opened.
09:58Sophie was standing inside.
09:59She wore a pink hoodie, her hair thrown into a messy bun.
10:02She had no makeup on, and there were dark circles under her eyes.
10:05She grinned and grabbed my suitcase.
10:07Come on.
10:07Luke's waiting downstairs.
10:09I looked at her.
10:10I told you I didn't need anyone to see me off.
10:12Oh, come on.
10:13She hooked her arm through mine and dragged me toward the exit.
10:17Who knows when you'll be back?
10:19What's wrong with letting us take you to the airport?
10:22Luke's car sat beneath the streetlight downstairs, the engine still running.
10:25He got out, took my suitcase, and put it in the trunk without saying much.
10:29The car was quiet.
10:30Sophie sat in the passenger seat.
10:31I sat in the back.
10:32Ten minutes into the drive, she suddenly turned around.
10:35Sarah, make sure you eat properly over there.
10:38Your stomach's always been sensitive.
10:41Mm-hmm.
10:43And don't reach for food whenever you're stressed.
10:45You already ha-
10:46She stopped herself.
10:48You already get nervous easily.
10:49Too much stress will make you lose sleep.
10:52I know.
10:54Video call me when you miss me?
10:56What's the time difference again?
10:57Eight hours?
10:58When you're asleep, I'll probably just be getting off work.
11:01Enough.
11:01Luke interrupted.
11:02Let her have some quiet.
11:03Sophie stuck out her tongue and turned back around.
11:05Luke's eyes flicked toward me in the rearview mirror.
11:08I looked away and watched the streetlights race past the window.
11:11At the airport, Luke pushed my suitcase while Sophie clung to my arm.
11:15The three of us walked together, just like always.
11:17Except this time, I was in the middle instead of on the edge.
11:19Because this would be the last.
11:21At the check-in counter, I finished the process and got my boarding pass.
11:25Sophie hugged me tightly.
11:26Sarah, you idiot.
11:28She buried her face against my shoulder.
11:30Her voice muffled.
11:30Who am I supposed to go shopping with after you leave?
11:33I patted her back.
11:35You have Luke.
11:35She let me go.
11:36Wiped the corner of her eye, then glanced at Luke as if giving him a signal.
11:40Luke stood a few feet away.
11:41Holding something, he walked over and handed me a brown paper bag.
11:47Food for the flight.
11:50And he hesitated.
11:52Text me when you land.
11:53I took the bag and nodded.
11:54Then I turned toward security.
11:57Sarah.
11:58Luke called after me.
11:59I stopped, but didn't turn around.
12:00If things don't work out over there, you can always come back.
12:03I said nothing.
12:04I dragged my suitcase into the security line.
12:07The line was long.
12:08I looked back once.
12:09From a distance, I saw Sophie talking animatedly to Luke,
12:12gesturing with both hands.
12:14Luke was looking down at his phone, typing something.
12:16Neither of them looked particularly sad.
12:18They looked as relaxed as if they had just watched someone run out for groceries
12:21and expected her back any minute.
12:23I turned around.
12:24Gate B-12.
12:25I found a seat and opened the bag Luke had given me.
12:29A sandwich.
12:30A bottle of water.
12:31Mints.
12:32A bag of chips.
12:33And beneath everything else, a sticky note.
12:35Sophie's round handwriting covered it.
12:37Fatty, the outside world is scary.
12:39You definitely won't last long before you miss us.
12:41When that happens, Luke and I will come bring you home.
12:44It's not like you can control your appetite anyway.
12:46I stared at the word fatty for a long time as the plane taxied down the runway.
12:50I tore the note in half and stuffed it back into the bag.
12:53Twelve hours later, I landed in London and turned on my phone.
12:56Thirty-seven messages.
12:57Most were memes and voice messages from Sophie.
13:00Luke had sent only one.
13:01Tell me when you land, I replied with two words.
13:03I'm here.
13:04Then I closed the conversation.
13:05My friend Emma was waiting at arrivals,
13:07holding a cardboard sign with an ugly little stick figure drawn on it.
13:11Sarah, welcome to your new life.
13:13I wheeled my suitcase toward her.
13:15The London air was cold and damp.
13:17I took a deep breath anyway.
13:18No one here would call me fatty.
13:23My first week in London, I was still fighting jet lag.
13:26One night, I woke up at three and couldn't fall asleep again.
13:28I sat by the bay window of my rental, staring at the streetlights outside.
13:32When my phone lit up, Sophie had posted on Instagram nine photos.
13:35Every single one was of her and Luke.
13:38Restaurants, movie theaters, shopping centers.
13:40The caption read,
13:41Life's so boring without Sarah.
13:43Luke, you're responsible for entertaining me now?
13:45Our old co-workers piled into the comments.
13:47You two gonna make it official already?
13:49Childhood friends' romance is dead.
13:50Bestie swoops in.
13:51Who's gonna be our third wheel now that Sarah's gone?
13:53LOL, Luke replied to one.
13:55Stop making things up.
13:57Sophie answered with a blushing emoji.
14:00I stared at the screen for a long time.
14:01I couldn't quite name what I felt.
14:03It wasn't jealousy. It was something colder.
14:05The despair of having something I already knew finally confirmed.
14:08After I left, their lives hadn't developed a missing piece.
14:11They looked more complete.
14:12Without the heavy, unnecessary third person around,
14:15they could finally stand naturally beside each other.
14:18Emma pushed open the door, carrying two mugs of hot chocolate.
14:23What are you doing awake in the middle of the-
14:25She glanced at my screen.
14:29Is that the best friend you grew up with?
14:32Yeah.
14:32Emma shoved a mug into my hands.
14:36Enough.
14:37Put the phone down.
14:38Tomorrow's your first day at work.
14:39I took a sip.
14:41The hot chocolate burned the tip of my tongue.
14:43I muted Sophie on Instagram.
14:44Then Luke.
14:45My first day at work felt unfamiliar in every possible way.
14:48New co-workers.
14:49A completely different pace.
14:51I struggled to follow meetings and took so many notes.
14:53My hand hurt, but no one called me fatty.
14:56No one mimicked the way I tugged at my clothes.
14:58And when I finally did something right, no one said,
15:00wow, she actually managed it.
15:02At lunch, a co-worker complimented one detail in my proposal.
15:05It was an ordinary compliment.
15:07I almost cried.
15:08That weekend, I stepped onto the bathroom scale for the first time.
15:11The numbers flickered.
15:12One hundred fifty-four pounds.
15:14I stared at them, then raised my eyes in the mirror.
15:16The woman looking back at me had rounded shoulders,
15:18and almost no definition between her chin and neck.
15:21Emma asked from the kitchen the next morning.
15:23Want to come with me?
15:24I hit the gym at six.
15:26It's right around the corner.
15:27I looked at her.
15:28Okay.
15:28By the second week, I could walk on the treadmill without gripping the rails.
15:31By the third, I switched lunch to chicken breast and salad,
15:34and stopped eating late-night snacks.
15:36In the fourth week, a co-worker looked at me in the break room.
15:40Sarah, have you lost weight?
15:41By week six, I bought a pair of medium jeans.
15:44The last time I had fit into a medium, I was in middle school.
15:47My hands shook as I pulled them on.
15:49Not from excitement.
15:50From unfamiliarity.
15:51So this was what my own body could feel like.
15:53When it was lighter, by week eight, the scale read 120.
15:5734 pounds.
15:58I touched my face.
15:59Then suddenly, I started crying.
16:00I wasn't sad.
16:01For the first time, I felt like this body belonged to me.
16:04Layer by layer, Luke's messages changed too.
16:07One message a day became three.
16:09Then one every morning, after noon and night.
16:11At first, they sounded like normal concern.
16:13Then they started getting strange.
16:15Who did you have lunch with today?
16:16Was that co-worker a guy or a girl?
16:19You're not working this weekend.
16:20Why aren't you answering?
16:21I either replied with a few words,
16:22or didn't answer at all.
16:24Then came the message that morning.
16:25I'll be in London next week for work.
16:27A moment later, another appeared.
16:28There are some things I need to tell you in person.
16:31I stared at it.
16:32I didn't reply.
16:33On Friday, I walked out of my office after working late.
16:36Dusk had just settled over London.
16:37Someone stood at the bottom of the steps.
16:39He looked up when he saw me.
16:41Then he froze.
16:41His gaze dropped from my face to my shoulders.
16:44My waist.
16:44The jeans that now hung noticeably loose around me.
16:47Then his eyes returned to my face.
16:49His lips parted.
16:50His Adam's apple moved.
16:51There was naked astonishment in his eyes.
16:53Sarah?
16:56I stayed on the steps.
16:58Luke walked forward twice, then stopped as if he thought I might run.
17:04You-
17:04His voice was hoarse.
17:05How much weight did you lose?
17:07I didn't answer.
17:08He took a deep breath, as if rearranging everything in his head.
17:12I came this time because of Sophie.
17:15She confessed to me last month.
17:18She said she's always liked me.
17:20The air seemed to freeze.
17:22Whatever vague, indescribable thing had still been lingering inside me, finally shattered.
17:28He seemed relieved.
17:30You're not mad?
17:33I shook my head.
17:37Fatty.
17:37Sarah!
17:38I corrected him.
17:39He froze again.
17:41He had done a lot of that tonight.
17:44Right.
17:44Sarah.
17:46Sophie said she wanted to apologize.
17:48When you come back, maybe the three of us can still-
17:51I'm not coming back.
17:54His expression changed.
17:56What do you mean?
17:59I mean I'm not coming back, Luke.
18:02London was completely dark now, streetlights flickered one by one.
18:05I looked at the face I had known better than any other for eight years, then I smiled.
18:10Goodbye.
18:11I walked past him toward the underground.
18:13No footsteps followed me.
18:15His reflection appeared in the glass doors behind me.
18:18He stood exactly where I had left him.
18:20He didn't follow.
18:21Maybe he was still trying to process what he had just seen.
18:24Around Sarah he had known forever.
18:26The girl who had always followed behind him had become someone he could no longer simply
18:30expect to keep up.
18:32I didn't sleep at all that night.
18:34The next morning, I showed up at work with dark circles under my eyes.
18:37Emma took one look at me and silently refilled my espresso.
18:40Those two again?
18:42Last time.
18:44She snorted, but didn't ask anything else.
18:46The work week moved fast.
18:47My new project was so intense I barely had time to think about anything else.
18:51I handled the international e-commerce side,
18:53and had to negotiate directly with clients in English.
18:56At first, I stumbled.
18:58Then I got better.
18:58During our weekly meeting, my director singled out my proposal for praise.
19:02The perspective was original and the data was solid.
19:05No one added,
19:06Wow, she actually did it.
19:08It was just praise.
19:09Normal recognition.
19:11When I stood to thank him, my voice was steady.
19:13I received an unexpected message.
19:15It was from Nathan.
19:17He was my class president in high school and sat behind me in class.
19:19Nathan had later gone to Cambridge for graduate school and stayed in London to work in finance.
19:24We had never been close.
19:26Thanks.
19:26But we weren't strangers either.
19:28It had been a simple classmate relationship.
19:30No nicknames.
19:31No mocking.
19:32Sure, I replied.
19:34Friday night.
19:35He took me to a restaurant by the Thames.
19:37He wore a sharp suit, but his smile was exactly the same.
19:40You've changed a lot.
19:41You seem more confident.
19:43And you've lost a lot of weight.
19:45I almost didn't recognize you.
19:47Really?
19:48High school.
19:49You barely looked people in the eye when you talked.
19:52You always ordered the largest uniform size and hid in the back row.
19:54You're different now.
19:55I looked down at the menu.
19:59Maybe it's the environment.
20:01What kind of environment?
20:04One where nobody calls me fatty.
20:07His hand stopped.
20:09Who called you fatty?
20:13No one anymore.
20:14I smiled.
20:16It's in the past.
20:17Dinner was easy.
20:18He talked about work.
20:19How we were a large sponge fifties.
20:21Things that had happened back in high school.
20:22Not once did he say anything that made me uncomfortable when the check came.
20:26He said,
20:27If you ever need anything here, call me.
20:29You don't have to handle everything alone.
20:32Okay.
20:33On the way home, I posted my first Instagram update since moving to London.
20:37A photo of the Thames at night.
20:40Five minutes later, Sophie commented.
20:44I stared at it for two seconds, then deleted her comment.
20:48Three minutes later, Luke called.
20:50I didn't answer.
20:52He texted instead.
20:54Who did you have dinner with, guy or girl?
20:56What does that have to do with you?
20:59He went silent for a long time.
21:01Then he said something I hadn't expected.
21:05Sarah, Sophie and I aren't together.
21:09I froze.
21:11Didn't you say she confessed to you?
21:13She did.
21:15I didn't say yes.
21:17But last time-
21:18You asked whether I'd accepted and I didn't answer.
21:22You turned around and left.
21:23I leaned against the back seat of the cab and watched the city lights streak past outside.
21:28How ridiculous.
21:29When he stayed silent, it meant no.
21:31When I stayed silent, everyone treated it as yes.
21:34Because he never explained himself.
21:35He simply assumed I should understand.
21:37What's the point of telling me now?
21:40Sarah.
21:43Sarah, there are things I didn't understand before.
21:46And you understand them now?
21:49I'm trying to.
21:51Then take your time.
21:52I hung up.
21:55The cab stopped outside my apartment.
21:57It was eleven at night in London and the wind was cold.
21:59When I went upstairs, Emma was watching a show in the living room.
22:02Well, look who's back from her date.
22:07It wasn't a date.
22:09Sure, sure.
22:10She didn't even look up.
22:13Your phone's vibrated about 800 times.
22:15I checked it.
22:16Sophie had sent a long voice message.
22:18Sarah, did you mute me?
22:19What was that supposed to mean, deleting my comment?
22:22I only said it because I care about-
22:23I stopped the message and didn't reply.
22:26That night, I slept perfectly.
22:27I didn't dream once.
22:30By my third month in London, my project won the best project of the quarter.
22:35When my director announced it in front of the whole team.
22:39Sarah?
22:39Everyone applauded.
22:41Someone whistled.
22:42I stood there with my ears ringing, not from nerves, from the strange disbelief of finally
22:47being recognized.
22:49Emma gave me a thumbs up from her desk.
22:51Sarah, you're buying dinner.
22:52So that night, I really did take a few people from the team out.
22:56Everyone talked and laughed.
22:57No one mocked my accent or my expressions.
23:00No one suggested.
23:02Let's order Sarah dessert.
23:03You know she'll want it.
23:05I held a glass of water and listened to everyone's toast.
23:07On the way home, I saw a post online.
23:09An old co-worker had uploaded screenshots from our former company group chat.
23:13Sophie's messages.
23:14How long do you think Sarah will last in London?
23:17I give her three months before she comes crying home.
23:19She can barely run on a treadmill.
23:21And she thinks she's going to lose weight?
23:23The co-worker who had left the sticky note on my monitor added a caption.
23:27For eight years, this was what she had said when I wasn't around.
23:30No one had ever shown me before.
23:32Or maybe if they had, I would have made excuses for her.
23:35Now, finally.
23:36I didn't want to make excuses anymore.
23:39My phone rang.
23:43It was Nathan.
23:45How are you doing, Sarah?
23:47I'm good, Nathan.
23:48Sarah, there's a Founders Networking event this weekend.
23:51Want to come?
23:52What kind?
23:55Mostly international trade.
23:56It lines up with what your company does.
23:58There'll be a few investors too.
24:00Never hurts to meet people.
24:01As I replied, I saved the screenshots of Sophie's messages.
24:05A reminder to myself, don't go soft again.
24:07At the networking event that weekend, Nathan introduced me to several people working in
24:11international trade.
24:12The conversations went surprisingly well.
24:14One investor seemed particularly interested in our company's business model.
24:18Before leaving, he exchanged contact information with me.
24:20Your international market case studies are interesting.
24:22Want to schedule a call next week?
24:24Absolutely.
24:25Nathan smiled at me.
24:28Sarah, you negotiate business deals more naturally than you make small talk now.
24:32Do I?
24:34Seriously, you barely talked before.
24:37You're completely different.
24:39Wind blew in from the Thames.
24:41Maybe.
24:42He didn't ask what I meant.
24:44Come on, I'll take you home.
24:45That night, I opened my laptop to organize the contacts I had collected at the event.
24:49Three messages from Luke appeared on my phone.
24:52Sarah, I'll be in London for work in early May.
24:54I'll be there for a week.
24:55Can we meet?
24:55After thinking about it.
24:57Busy.
24:58His reply came almost instantly.
24:59You don't even have time for one meal?
25:02Maybe not.
25:06I'll ask again when I get there.
25:08I didn't reply.
25:10Emma poked her head out of her room.
25:12That high school guy asked you out?
25:15He's coming here for work next month.
25:18Not him.
25:19Luke.
25:21Oh.
25:22I turned off the lamp.
25:23He's coming for work too.
25:24Emma was quiet for two seconds.
25:27You gonna see him?
25:28I stared at the ceiling.
25:30I don't know.
25:32Sarah, I'm only going to say one thing.
25:34Go ahead.
25:35Everyone else is moving forward.
25:37Don't turn around.
25:39Good night.
25:39Good night, Sarah.
25:42At the end of April, the company officially assigned me a new project.
25:45I would independently lead the international expansion strategy for a major e-commerce platform.
25:50It was the biggest project I had handled since arriving in London.
25:53My director called me into his office.
25:55I believe in your approach.
25:57Sarah, run with it.
25:59When I walked out of his office, my palms were damp from excitement.
26:03The kind that came from finally having someone trust me.
26:05That night, I worked until eleven putting together the project framework.
26:08When I finally got home, someone was leaning against the wall outside my apartment.
26:12Luke.
26:13He had arrived a week earlier than he'd said he would, and he held a paper bag.
26:16The second he saw me, he straightened.
26:18Why are you here?
26:20My trip got moved up.
26:22He looked at me, his eyes bright beneath the streetlight.
26:24His gaze lingered on my body again.
26:26You've lost so much weight.
26:28Are you even eating properly?
26:30I ignored the question.
26:31I'm busy.
26:33I know.
26:33He held out the bag.
26:34I passed a bakery and bought your favorite lemon tart.
26:37There was also a bag of chips inside.
26:39I didn't take it.
26:41Luke, don't you think showing up at my apartment without warning is a little inappropriate?
26:45His hand stiffened, then dropped.
26:47The paper bag swayed gently.
26:49So I need an appointment now?
26:51He smiled.
26:52When are you free, Sarah?
26:56Not this week.
26:57I'm rushing to finish a project.
26:59Next week?
27:00I don't know.
27:01He stared at me for several seconds.
27:03Are you actually busy, or do you just not want to see me?
27:06Both, but I'm actually busy.
27:09Then I'll go.
27:10Take the lemon tart inside, don't waste it.
27:12He walked two steps, then stopped.
27:13Oh, right.
27:14He turned back.
27:16Sophie asked me to bring you a letter.
27:17It's in the bag.
27:18I glanced down at it.
27:19Why didn't you just message me?
27:21She says you don't read her messages.
27:23Then that means I don't want to read them.
27:26This time, he had nothing to say.
27:27He turned and left.
27:29I watched until his back disappeared at the end of the street.
27:32Then I picked up the bag.
27:35I gave the lemon tart to Emma.
27:38I opened Sophie's letter and read the first line.
27:40The handwriting was shaky, as though she had written them while crying.
27:44Sarah, I know you're mad at me.
27:46But do you know how much I realized I depended on you after you left?
27:49There were several more pages.
27:50I folded the letter and put it in the back of a drawer.
27:53Not because I couldn't bear to throw it away.
27:55Because I wanted the reminder.
27:58The next afternoon, I was in a video meeting with a client when the system suddenly froze.
28:03I disconnected and tried to reconnect.
28:05Then a message appeared in our work chat.
28:07It was from client contact.
28:09That's Sarah.
28:10Good afternoon.
28:11Sophie said she was your alternate contact.
28:13Can you clarify what's going on?
28:14I stared at the screen.
28:16What the hell was happening?
28:19I called Sophie.
28:21She didn't answer the first time.
28:24She picked up on the second.
28:26Her voice sweet.
28:29Sarah!
28:30You finally called me!
28:32Sophie, why did you call my client?
28:34Silence for a second.
28:36Oh, that!
28:38I was just trying to help.
28:41You used to get nervous talking to clients, remember?
28:44I thought I'd introduce myself first and make things easier for you.
28:48I took a deep breath.
28:51Sophie, you contacted my client without my permission and pretended to be my co-worker.
28:57Do you understand how serious that is?
29:00Pretended?
29:01Her voice hurt.
29:04I didn't lie.
29:06I told them I was your friend.
29:09My client almost thought something had happened to me and that I couldn't manage the account anymore.
29:15But I explained it.
29:17I told them you were just really busy lately.
29:20Who asked you to explain anything for me?
29:23Silence.
29:23Then she inhaled.
29:24Her voice changed, becoming small and wounded.
29:27Sarah, I really was just trying to help.
29:31I've felt guilty ever since you left.
29:36I wanted to make it up to you.
29:38I thought you'd be happy.
29:40Sophie, I don't need your help!
29:43And from now on, don't contact anyone connected to my work.
29:47I hung up.
29:49My hands were shaking.
29:51Not from anger.
29:53From the overwhelming relief of finally saying the words out loud.
29:58I explained the situation with Sophie to my director.
30:02He took it well.
30:03As long as it's handled.
30:04I also apologized to the client.
30:07Fortunately, they weren't too concerned and scheduled the official call for the next day.
30:11Everything was back on track.
30:13But that night, Luke messaged me.
30:15Sarah, Sophie cried all afternoon.
30:18I was completely calm.
30:20What does that have to do with me?
30:22She says you yelled at her.
30:23I didn't yell.
30:25I told her to stay out of my work.
30:26She was only trying to help.
30:27Luke!
30:28I cut him off.
30:30She impersonated someone from my company and called my client.
30:33You call that helping?
30:34Several seconds of silence.
30:36What do you mean?
30:37Exactly what I said.
30:38She called the office of a client I'm working with, claimed she was my alternate contact,
30:42and told them to coordinate with her.
30:44Another silence.
30:45Then he asked.
30:46Why would she do that?
30:47I laughed.
30:48You're asking me?
30:49Ask her.
30:50This time, he didn't defend Sophie.
30:52He didn't send another message either.
30:54The client call the next day went smoothly.
30:57They loved the proposal and confirmed their intent to move forward with the first phase
31:01on the spot.
31:03After the call ended, I sat staring at my computer screen for a while.
31:07I might have lost that million dollar deal before, but I was doing well in London.
31:11It wasn't about proving anything to anyone.
31:13I had finally learned that I wasn't someone who simply couldn't succeed.
31:16That afternoon, Nathan messaged me.
31:19Congrats on landing the project.
31:20Lunch is on me?
31:21How did you know?
31:23Your director is a friend of mine.
31:24He sent an emoji.
31:25He says his team found a gem.
31:27I stared at the word gem.
31:29Someone used a positive word to describe me.
31:31Not fatty.
31:32Not piggy.
31:33Not butterball.
31:34Can't do lunch?
31:35Dinner?
31:36Done.
31:36I'll book somewhere.
31:38Dinner was easy and enjoyable.
31:40Nathan told me he was planning to move into early stage investment and had been looking
31:44at international businesses.
31:46If this project goes well and your company needs funding later, we should talk.
31:50You'd invest in me?
31:52Your company.
31:52He smiled.
31:53Though if you ever start something yourself, I'd invest in that too.
31:57Stop joking.
31:59I'm not.
31:59He looked at me seriously.
32:01Sarah, you're a lot more capable than you think you are.
32:04It was drizzling when we left the restaurant.
32:07He handed me his umbrella.
32:08My car's in the garage.
32:09I won't need it.
32:10Thanks.
32:11You're welcome.
32:12He walked a few steps, then turned around.
32:14Oh, there's an exhibition next week related to your industry.
32:16Wanna go?
32:17Sure.
32:19London in May smelled clean after the rain.
32:21I walked toward my apartment under Nathan's umbrella.
32:24Feeling lighter than I had in a long time.
32:26Then my phone rang.
32:29It was Luke.
32:31Sarah, I looked into what Sophie did with your client.
32:33Okay.
32:34She was wrong, but…
32:36I waited for the but.
32:37She told me she was desperate to fix things between you.
32:40She knew you weren't reading her messages,
32:41so she was trying to find another way to reach you.
32:43I stood in the rain as the wind pushed my umbrella sideways.
32:46So calling my client was her way of reaching me?
32:48I know it sounds wrong.
32:50Then we agree.
32:51Sarah, can you give her another chance?
32:54I gave her eight years of chances.
32:56He went quiet.
32:57A long time has passed.
32:59Then he said,
33:00I'm going home next week.
33:02Okay.
33:03You really won't see me before I leave?
33:04I thought for a moment.
33:05Luke, did you actually come to London for work?
33:08Or did you come here for me?
33:09He said nothing.
33:10But this time, his silence wasn't an unclear signal.
33:13I understood it perfectly.
33:15He had come for me.
33:16He just would never say it outright.
33:18Because he was used to making me guess.
33:20Used to making me take the first step.
33:22Used to making me move closer.
33:24Then we don't need to meet.
33:26Sarah.
33:26When you get home, be good to Sophie.
33:29I hung up.
33:30The rain came down harder.
33:31I didn't run.
33:32I simply walked home beneath my umbrella.
33:34The cuffs of my pants got soaked.
33:36Water seeped into my shoes.
33:38But every step felt solid.
33:42The day Luke left, he sent me a very long message.
33:45I didn't open it.
33:46I simply scrolled past.
33:48I only caught the first few words.
33:50Sarah.
33:51Ever since high school.
33:53Enough.
33:54I didn't want to hear another story that started with ever since high school.
33:57June brought one of London's rare stretches of sunshine.
34:00The first phase of my project wrapped up.
34:02And the client's response exceeded expectations.
34:06During our review meeting, my director announced that the contract value for phase two had doubled.
34:11I would still lead the team.
34:12Afterward, my coworkers congratulated me.
34:15Someone joked,
34:16Sarah, at this rate, are you going to open a whole new branch over here?
34:20Maybe.
34:23I knew you could do it.
34:24That night, we opened a bottle of wine and sat on the balcony.
34:27Do you regret coming to London?
34:29You tell me.
34:30No.
34:31Exactly.
34:33Have you thought about what happens next?
34:34Stay here?
34:35Go back?
34:36I looked toward the Thames in the distance.
34:38I don't know.
34:39I'm focusing on what's in front of me.
34:41And what about your Luke?
34:43My Luke?
34:43Emma tapped her glass against mine.
34:45Don't pretend.
34:46I saw him through the peephole that night.
34:48He's pretty good looking.
34:50What good does that do?
34:52Fair, she shrugged.
34:53If he's not good to you, then he's not good enough.
34:55I smiled and finished my wine.
34:58At the beginning of July, Nathan officially confirmed his interest in investing in our company.
35:05During the first round of due diligence, he met with my director.
35:10When he came back, he said,
35:12Your boss thinks very highly of you.
35:15Really?
35:16Really?
35:17He said the company had been stuck in this area before you arrived.
35:19You're the one who finally made the model work.
35:21I didn't respond.
35:22Nathan looked at me.
35:23Sarah, do you know what your problem is?
35:26What?
35:27You still don't really believe you deserve recognition.
35:32I froze.
35:33He continued.
35:34Whenever someone compliments you, your first response isn't thank you.
35:37It's really.
35:39Old habit.
35:40Habits can change.
35:41He smiled, then switched topics.
35:44My friend has an art show next weekend.
35:46Interested?
35:47What kind of art?
35:49Contemporary.
35:50Honestly, I don't understand half of it either.
35:51I mostly go for the experience.
35:53Then sure.
35:54In mid-July, I arrived at the exhibition and saw someone who had absolutely no reason to be in London.
36:01Sophie.
36:02She stood at the entrance in a floral dress.
36:04Her hair curled tightly.
36:06Then she saw me.
36:07Her smile froze.
36:08Sarah?
36:09Her gaze swept over me.
36:10Her eyes widened.
36:13How did you get this thin?
36:14It took her a full three seconds to swallow her shock and force the smile back onto her face.
36:19Oh my god!
36:20I barely recognized you!
36:23What are you doing here?
36:25Vacation!
36:26She hooked her arm through mine as naturally as ever.
36:29You never answer my messages, so I had to fly over and see you myself.
36:34Nathan walked up behind me and glanced at Sophie.
36:37Your friend?
36:37Sophie looked up at him.
36:39Her eyes brightened.
36:40Hi!
36:41I'm Sophie, Sarah's best friend.
36:42And you are?
36:44Nathan, Sarah's classmate.
36:45Sophie's smile widened.
36:47A classmate?
36:48Then let's all look around together.
36:50She naturally slipped between Nathan and me.
36:53I looked at her completely shameless face and took a slow breath.
36:57It was the same scene I had known for eight years.
36:59Sophie arrived.
37:00And suddenly, all the oxygen in the room belonged to her, except this time was different.
37:06Sophie?
37:06Do you have Nathan's contact information?
37:09Huh?
37:10Not yet.
37:11Then maybe another time.
37:12I walked around to Nathan's other side.
37:14We're going in.
37:16Sophie's smile stiffened, only for a second.
37:18Then it returned.
37:19She followed us into the gallery.
37:21But I could feel her eyes on my back, testing, displeased.
37:24I didn't turn around.
37:27Halfway through the exhibition, Sophie kept finding excuses to move closer to Nathan.
37:32Wow, this one's so interesting.
37:34What do you think, Nathan?
37:36This gallery is huge.
37:38Do you come to places like this often?
37:39Nathan answered politely.
37:41But his body remained angled toward me.
37:43I noticed Sophie's lips tighten.
37:45As we left the gallery, she stopped me.
37:47Sarah, can we talk privately?
37:49Nathan glanced at me.
37:50I nodded.
37:51He walked away to get a phone call.
37:52Sophie pulled me toward a bench in the corridor.
37:56Sarah, I've missed you so much.
37:58Her voice dropped.
37:59Her eyes turned red.
38:00After you left, I finally realized how hard life was without you.
38:04I looked at her.
38:06What was hard about it?
38:07She lowered her head and...
38:08It's just...
38:09...and twisted her fingers together.
38:10No one at work hangs out with me anymore.
38:13Luke blames me too.
38:14He says you left because of me.
38:15Didn't I?
38:16Her head snapped up.
38:18Sarah, you think it was my fault too?
38:19I didn't answer.
38:20Her tears immediately spilled over.
38:23I know I wasn't perfect before, but I really did think of you as my best friend.
38:27Your way of treating me like your best friend was calling me fatty in front of everyone.
38:32Imitating me, tugging down my clothes, mocking the sound of a chair under me,
38:36costing me a deal, and then pretending to be my co-worker so you could contact my client.
38:41She cried harder.
38:42I didn't mean to.
38:43I really didn't know you cared that much.
38:45You didn't know?
38:46I thought you wouldn't get mad.
38:47Because I never got mad before, right?
38:52She froze.
38:54Tears clung to her cheeks.
38:55The old Sarah never got angry, but that wasn't because I didn't care.
39:01It was because I was afraid to.
39:02Her lips moved.
39:03She seemed about to say something.
39:05And Sophie, there's something else I want to ask you.
39:08How did you know I'd be at this exhibition?
39:10Her hands stopped halfway through.
39:11What?
39:12You acted like running into me was a coincidence.
39:15But this exhibition wasn't publicly advertised.
39:17It was invitation only.
39:18Her expression changed.
39:20Only for an instant.
39:21But I saw it.
39:23I asked the organizers.
39:25There's no Sophie on the guest list.
39:29I stood.
39:30You went through.
39:31Found information about Nathan, and tracked down this event.
39:34She stopped talking.
39:36Tears were still running down her face.
39:38But she wasn't crying anymore.
39:39Sophie, you didn't fly all the way to London to see me.
39:43She looked up.
39:44Her eyes had changed.
39:45The hurt, pitiful, Sophie was gone.
39:48In her place was someone cold.
39:50Someone I had never seen before.
39:52So what?
39:52Her voice was low.
39:54You think you can run off to London, dump everyone you knew, and start over?
39:57Sarah, without me and Luke, you're nothing.
40:00My heart didn't even beat faster.
40:02Because she had already typed those words to me once.
40:05Back then, she'd wrapped them in a teasing tone and cute emojis.
40:09Now she had finally stopped pretending.
40:12She stared at my thinner face.
40:14So what if you lost weight?
40:17You think being skinny suddenly makes you special?
40:20Deep down, you're still that same fatty.
40:26Sophie, I have a good life in London.
40:30My work is going well.
40:32I have good friends.
40:36I don't need anyone to build my confidence for me.
40:39I don't need anyone to speak for me.
40:41And I don't need anyone calling me fatty.
40:45I know you're not used to that.
40:47Because you were used to keeping me beside you so I could make you look better.
40:51But that girl is gone.
40:52Her jaw tightened.
40:54Her lips pressed into a thin line.
40:56Then she smiled.
40:57A faint, bitter smile.
41:00Whether I'm thin or not, you never had the right to call me fatty.
41:04I didn't lose weight to become someone else.
41:06And I didn't do it to make you regret anything.
41:09I did it because I wanted to be myself.
41:12Sophie's eyes hardened.
41:14Well, look at you, Sarah.
41:16Think you're too good for us now?
41:20Fine.
41:21Just wait.
41:22She stood, grabbed her purse and walked away.
41:24Her heels struck the gallery floor harder with every step.
41:28I watched her leave.
41:29I wasn't nervous.
41:30I wasn't afraid.
41:31I only remembered one thought.
41:33The person left behind eventually learned how to get ahead.
41:37Nathan came back and glanced in the direction Sophie had disappeared.
41:41Everything okay?
41:42Yeah.
41:43Ready to go?
41:43There's a good sushi place nearby.
41:45Let's go.
41:46That night, when I got home.
41:49I deleted Sophie and Luke from my contacts.
41:51I didn't block them.
41:53I deleted them.
41:54Blocking meant I still cared enough to keep a wall between us.
41:57Deleting meant I didn't need them anymore.
41:59What happened?
42:01I finally said everything I needed to say to the people from my past.
42:04And then?
42:08I leaned against the entryway and looked at the warm lights in my apartment,
42:11at the sunflowers I had bought for myself sitting on the coffee table.
42:15I smiled.
42:16There is no then.
42:18Three days after Sophie returned home from London, I received an email from HR at my
42:23former company.
42:23The subject read, Regarding confidentiality obligations following Sarah's departure.
42:29The email was long.
42:30The point was simple.
42:31The NDAI had signed when I left covered ownership of certain client data, and someone had accused
42:36me of taking confidential company files.
42:38The whistleblower wasn't named, but the email included one detail.
42:41Following an internal review, the records in question were last accessed using Sarah's employee
42:46ID on the afternoon of her final day.
42:49I read it twice.
42:50I hadn't even been at the office that afternoon.
42:52I cried in my car, then went straight home to pack.
42:56I called the coworker who had left the sticky note on my monitor.
42:59She answered in a low voice.
43:00Sarah, I was about to call you.
43:02Everyone at the company is saying you stole client files and left.
43:04Who said that?
43:05Who else?
43:06Sophie.
43:07She lowered her voice even more.
43:11She says she's your closest person, that you told her you copied the files just in case.
43:16Since when did I-
43:17I know it's not true, but HR has already opened an investigation.
43:20Were you really not back at the office that afternoon?
43:22No.
43:23My access card record can prove it.
43:25Then you need to find evidence fast.
43:26Sophie gave the boss very specific details.
43:31After we hung up, we sat at my desk and took several deep breaths.
43:35Sophie had said, just wait.
43:37So this was what she had meant.
43:39I opened my laptop and pulled up every record I had from the day I resigned.
43:43Slack location data showed that I had spent the afternoon in an underground parking garage.
43:48My ride history, credit card transactions, the access log from my apartment building.
43:52Every record pointed to the same conclusion.
43:55I had never gone back to the office. Then how but someone logged in with my employee ID.
43:59It took me three seconds. Only Sophie knew my workstation password.
44:04Once, her computer had stopped working and she asked to borrow mine.
44:08I had typed the password right in front of her. She laughed.
44:11Your password is seriously that easy? Fatty really is fatty.
44:14I organized every screenshot and sent them to HR at my former company.
44:18I copied my former director in the legal department by the time I finished.
44:21It was two in the morning.
44:22Emma got up to use the bathroom and saw the lights still on in my studies.
44:25What happened now?
44:28I gave her the short version. By the time I finished, her expression had darkened.
44:31That's literally framing you.
44:33Yeah.
44:34Is your friend insane?
44:35Maybe she always was. I just thought it was a cold before. Turns out it was a tumor.
44:40Emma poured me a glass of water.
44:41If you need help, ask. Don't carry this alone.
44:44I know. The next morning at work, I told my director in London what had happened.
44:48If your evidence trail is solid, you're fine. Let Legal handle the rest.
44:52Then he patted my shoulder.
44:53Keep doing your job. Don't let this throw you off.
44:58That afternoon, I got a message from Luke. A new number. I deleted his old one.
45:02Sarah. I heard about Sophie reporting you. I stared at the message for a long time.
45:06Then replied with one word. Okay. You definitely weren't back at the office that afternoon, right?
45:11No. What about your badge records? Legal already has them.
45:17Good. A moment later, another message appeared. I'll make Sophie withdraw the complaint.
45:22I stared at the screen. Make her withdraw it.
45:25Luke. This has already entered a formal legal process.
45:29She doesn't get to take it back whenever she feels like it.
45:32Silence again. After a long time, he replied.
45:35Sarah. What she did was wrong. But you don't have to.
45:39Don't have to what? Turn this into something huge.
45:43She just… Just what? Falsely accused me of stealing company files?
45:47Tried to stain my professional record? I waited five minutes, then deleted the new number too.
45:52When Emma came home, she found me sitting on the couch.
45:54Legal get back to you?
45:56Yeah. They said the evidence is more than enough. HR confirmed I wasn't responsible.
46:00The complaint was dismissed. Good.
46:03They also said I could take legal action if I wanted.
46:05Are you going to?
46:07I thought for a moment.
46:08Not right now. Why? Because I don't want to spend any more of my energy on her.
46:12Sarah, you're a hundred times more beautiful now than when I first met you.
46:14I smiled.
46:15In what way? Inside.
46:18At the end of July, the contract for phase two of the project was officially signed.
46:22The signing took place in our company conference room. It wasn't huge.
46:25But everyone who mattered was there. I spoke on behalf of the team.
46:28My voice stayed steady. I didn't stumble once.
46:30When I finished my last sentence and sat down, Nathan smiled at me from across the table.
46:34He silently mouthed one word. Impressive. After the meeting, he came over.
46:38Dinner tonight. We're celebrating.
46:40You're buying me dinner again?
46:42Because this deserves celebrating.
46:43That evening, we sat outside at a restaurant by the river beneath warm lights.
46:47So what's next?
46:48The contract is for three years. I'm going to focus on doing this well.
46:52Three years in London?
46:54Yeah.
46:56He nodded.
46:57Perfect.
46:58What's perfect?
47:00Instead of answering, he raised his glass.
47:03He's Sarah's next three years.
47:05And thank you for looking out for me these past six months.
47:09I wasn't looking out for you. I wanted to be there.
47:12I met his eyes. There was nothing but admiration in them. No pity.
47:16No condescending urge to protect me. No attitude that said,
47:19you poor thing. Let me save you. Nathan?
47:23Yeah?
47:24Are you trying to date me?
47:28He froze. Then he laughed.
47:32You finally noticed?
47:34Couldn't you have built up to it a little?
47:35I've been building up to it for six months, Sarah. Are you really that oblivious or are you pretending?
47:40I stared at him. Don't call me oblivious. His smile faded.
47:43Okay. I won't. What should I call you then?
47:45Just my name.
47:47Sarah.
47:48Yeah.
47:50Sarah, Sarah, Sarah.
47:51Oh my god, stop. He laughed, tipping his head back slightly. London's rare stars reflected in his eyes.
47:58So will you think about it?
48:00Think about what?
48:01Letting me officially pursue you.
48:03I'll think about it.
48:04No rush. I'll wait.
48:05I walked slowly on the way home that night. Even in July, the London night air carried a slight
48:10chill, but I felt warm inside. When I reached my apartment building, my phone buzzed.
48:17A text from an unfamiliar number back home. Sarah, I'm in London. I'm downstairs.
48:23I looked up. Luke stood beneath the streetlight outside my building. This time, he hadn't arrived
48:30a week early. He had simply appeared. There was no lemon tart in his hands. No paper bag. Nothing.
48:35He stood there as though he had been waiting for a long time. When he saw me, he straightened.
48:39There were only fifteen or twenty feet between us.
48:42Sarah, I forced Sophie to withdraw the accusation.
48:45Legal already closed the case.
48:48I stayed where I was.
48:50So? His voice dropped.
48:52So?
48:53Something seemed caught in his throat.
48:55So I wanted to tell you I'm sorry.
48:57The night wind swept in from the river. In eight years, this was the first time Luke
49:00had ever apologized to me.
49:02Luke.
49:02Yeah?
49:03That apology came way too late.
49:05I know.
49:05And you know what else?
49:06What?
49:07I don't need it anymore.
49:08I saw his fingers curl into a fist.
49:10Don't. Go home.
49:11I walked around him and entered the apartment building, closed my eyes for a moment, and took a deep breath.
49:17What happened?
49:19I smiled.
49:20Nothing.
49:22Set an alarm for me before tomorrow's morning meeting, okay?
49:25Working late again?
49:26No.
49:30I dropped onto the couch and stared at the ceiling.
49:34I just want to get to the office early tomorrow.
49:36Because tomorrow was a new day.
49:38New work.
49:39A new life that belonged entirely to me.
49:41Sarah was Sarah.
49:42Not Fatty.
49:43Not Piggy.
49:44Not Butterball.
49:45Not anyone's accessory.
49:46And I wasn't someone who needed a number on a scale to prove her worth.
49:49Still, I was glad about those 34 pounds.
49:51They were proof of how hard I had fought to take myself back from them.
49:54Outside, the lights of London burned all night.
49:56I slept deeply, and I didn't dream.
50:03I was scared to call God a moon at birth, so he rang the best way back to him.
50:03I was not científic as being laid in a sleep.