- 1 day ago
Category
🎈
FunTranscript
00:00For my boyfriend, I worked hard for a whole year, from 200 pounds to 90.
00:05Yet he did it right in front of me.
00:07Kiss another girl like he'd done it a hundred times.
00:10A year ago's promise was as worthless as scrap paper.
00:16He always complains about my weight, yet I remain oblivious.
00:19When I come back to exchange, we'll make it public.
00:25For that line, I pushed myself a year.
00:28220 down to 99.
00:33When I met him at the airport with flowers,
00:38he kissed another girl right in front of me.
00:40The flowers slipped out of my hand.
00:43Just as his buddy and I were about to get together,
00:46he finally woke up and wanted me back.
00:48Too late.
00:49Before he stared at me like that, I was at the airport,
00:52watching him kiss someone else.
00:54The day he landed, I stood at arrivals with flowers,
00:57flipping my front camera open and shut, ten times over.
01:00Then I saw him, Tanner, dragging his suitcase,
01:03wearing the black jacket I'd mailed him for Christmas.
01:05I opened my mouth to call his name.
01:08The girl in white got there first and hung around his neck.
01:13Chloe Prescott, the most popular girl in languages.
01:17He bent and kissed her, like he'd done it a hundred times.
01:22The flowers slipped out of my hand.
01:25Josie!
01:26Zach and I grew up on the same block.
01:28Grade school, he ran off the boys who mocked my weight.
01:33In middle school gym, when I couldn't keep up,
01:35he'd grumble and still slow down to wait.
01:37That's when I started falling for him.
01:39But when I grew up, he found me overweight.
01:42Once you slimmed down, I can finally take you out.
01:44Saying once I slimmed down, he could finally take me out.
01:48A year ago, he held me and promised to make it public upon his return.
01:51I really worked hard for a year, from 200 pounds to 90 pounds.
01:55Where's your little shadow?
01:56She didn't come get you?
01:57She doesn't know I landed today.
01:59Doesn't she text you every day?
02:01Exhausting.
02:02And told her it was my new number.
02:03Before I left, I handed her a teammate's burner
02:05and told her it was my new number.
02:06He's been answering her all year.
02:13Chloe doubled over.
02:15A whole year?
02:16And she never clocked it?
02:17As long as somebody replies, she's happy.
02:19She doesn't look closer than that.
02:22That exact second,
02:24it was the number I'd trusted every night for a year.
02:27The one that always told me goodnight.
02:29Morning, baby.
02:30Did you eat anything today besides coffee?
02:35Standing in the middle of that arrivals hall,
02:37I suddenly understood my whole life.
02:39Whoever had been calling me baby for 12 months,
02:42it was never him.
02:43Then I did something that surprised even me.
02:44I didn't walk over,
02:45didn't cry,
02:46didn't make a sound.
02:47I raised my phone and took a picture of the two of them.
02:50Then I looked down and typed three words back to that stranger's number.
02:55Who are you?
02:57I got into my car in the parking lot
02:59and scrolled through our entire chat history from the very beginning.
03:02At first, the replies were cold and distant.
03:04How's the exchange program?
03:06Fine.
03:08Did you eat?
03:09Yeah.
03:10Sometimes he'd leave me on read for three or four days.
03:14I made his excuses for him.
03:16Jet lag, practice, he's just bad at texting.
03:18I kept reaching out anyway,
03:19because reaching out was the only thing I knew how to do.
03:22Until late at night,
03:23I cried while typing and sending it over.
03:26I know I'm annoying.
03:27I just miss you.
03:28Please don't be mad at me.
03:29An hour later, he replied,
03:31You're not annoying.
03:32I'm sorry.
03:33I'll do better from now on.
03:35Everything changed after that.
03:36He remembered what time my classes started.
03:38He remembered how bad my stomach got during my period.
03:40If he found out I'd gone all day on nothing but a single ear of corn,
03:43he'd give me hell through the screen.
03:45On my birthday, Zach's real number said nothing at all.
03:48This one buzzed at midnight.
03:49Happy birthday.
03:50From now on, Josie gets to be happy.
03:51That night, I also signed up for a weight loss class.
03:53I thought he'd finally started to care about me.
03:55I thought if I could just be prettier,
03:57he'd finally admit I was his.
03:59Looking back now,
04:00not one line of that kindness ever came from Zach.
04:03It had gotten dark outside the car.
04:05I opened my photos
04:06and scrolled to one from a year ago.
04:09Round-faced, no chin in seat.
04:12Grinning between two milkshakes in an oversized hoodie.
04:14I sent it.
04:16Morning.
04:16By the way, this is what I actually looked like.
04:19Still feel like calling me baby?
04:22One minute, five, ten.
04:26Nothing.
04:27I laughed at myself and moved to delete the contact.
04:29Then my phone buzzed.
04:34A photo selfie of a muscular man.
04:41On the inside of the arm,
04:42holding the phone, one small mole.
04:44You went first.
04:47I'm not going to take that for free.
04:49I stared at the screen and my pulse went stupid.
04:53Nobody asked you to send that.
04:54Weren't you asking whether I still get to call you baby?
04:57And?
04:57I do.
04:58I would if you gained a hundred pounds tomorrow.
05:00My eyes spung.
05:01I should have deleted the photo.
05:02My thumb betrayed me and hit save.
05:03Fine.
05:03The better looking the liar, the better the lie.
05:05My finger moved back to delete contact.
05:08Someone was rapping on my window.
05:10Hey, excuse me?
05:11Zach, he must have spotted my car in the lot.
05:13I took a breath, wiped my face,
05:14and rolled the window down.
05:18Hi.
05:18He froze.
05:19His eyes moved over my face,
05:21my hair,
05:21my dress.
05:23Sorry.
05:24Wrong person.
05:25I looked at him.
05:26A year of mornings.
05:27A year of nights.
05:29Miles until my legs quit,
05:30and my own boyfriend stood there
05:31and looked straight through me like a stranger.
05:34Zach, come on!
05:35Chloe called from a few yards away.
05:36He turned to go,
05:37glanced back at my plate once,
05:38and frowned.
05:39I rolled the window up,
05:42then smiled at myself in the mirror.
05:44Okay, then.
05:45If you can't even remember my face,
05:47you don't get to keep the rest of me either.
05:52The second I walked in,
05:53Mom pushed a gold gift box into my hands.
05:56Zach stopped by,
05:57said the team's throwing a welcome back dinner
05:59for him and Wes tonight.
06:00He wants you there.
06:01He brought you this.
06:02I looked down.
06:04Alphabet chocolates.
06:05Six months ago,
06:06I'd casually mentioned to that number that
06:08I thought these were cute.
06:09Each piece had a letter on it,
06:10so you could spell out a name.
06:12Something dangerous flickered in my chest.
06:14He remembered.
06:14I opened the lid.
06:15Four letters were missing.
06:16My phone lit up with Chloe's new story.
06:18Four chocolate letters lay in her.
06:20Open palm,
06:21spelling one word.
06:22Zach's hand rested on her waist.
06:24On his wrist was the watch I gave him last birthday.
06:26The caption read,
06:27Someone got off a plane and already knows what's his.
06:29Zach hadn't remembered anything.
06:31He'd bought a box for her
06:32and handed me whatever she didn't want.
06:34Do you like it?
06:36No.
06:37A tear landed inside the box
06:39before I noticed I was crying.
06:40I walked outside and dropped the whole box in the trash.
06:43I'd spent a year trying to make myself worthy of him.
06:45He couldn't even give me a full box of candy.
06:47I was still standing over the trash can
06:49when my phone buzzed again.
06:51That number.
06:52Go check your front door.
06:53Another gold box was sitting on the step.
06:55Same brand.
06:56Sealed.
06:56Every single letter still inside.
06:59You sent this?
07:00I saw you liked one month ago.
07:03Figured today you might need it.
07:06Why are you so good to me?
07:08Because I like you.
07:11Even if I'd never lost the weight?
07:13Especially then.
07:15I have never once measured you by a number.
07:19Mom!
07:20Where's that welcome back dinner tonight?
07:23You said you weren't going.
07:25Changed my mind.
07:30Somewhere at that table was a man who'd loved me for a year
07:32without ever seeing my face.
07:34Tonight I was going to find him.
07:37The team had taken over the back room of a steakhouse
07:39two blocks off campus.
07:40A dozen guys from the Hawks plus Chloe's crowd.
07:42The room went quiet for half a beat when I walked in.
07:45You?
07:45He'd seen me twice today and still didn't know my name.
07:48Chloe recovered first.
07:50Missed him at the airport?
07:52So you followed him to dinner?
07:53This is a team thing, sweetheart.
07:56Uninvited is a little sad.
07:58Somebody invited me.
07:59Who?
08:00I didn't answer.
08:01I was scanning the table.
08:02Half of them were drinking and talking.
08:04A few were playing cards in the corner.
08:06Any one of them could have been him.
08:08Then I saw the seat by the window.
08:09One guy sitting alone.
08:11Black T stretched across his shoulders.
08:12Gray sweatpants.
08:13Exactly like the photo.
08:14My eyes went straight to the inside of his forearm.
08:16There it was.
08:17One small mole.
08:18I'd found him.
08:19Everything I'd been holding in all day
08:20suddenly had somewhere to go.
08:22He looked up.
08:22Across a crowded room, his eyes landed on me.
08:24I took a step toward him.
08:25A hand clamped around my wrist.
08:27Zach was looking at me like he'd seen a ghost.
08:33Josie?
08:41Wait.
08:41She's that childhood sweetheart you grew up with?
08:43The 200-pound one?
08:45Every face turned towards me, including him.
08:48I pulled my wrist out of Zach's hand.
08:50Childhood sweetheart?
08:51Our parents are friends.
08:52That's the entire relationship.
08:53Was.
08:54I didn't know you'd lost weight.
08:56You didn't speak to me for a year.
08:57Of course you didn't know.
08:59I crossed the room.
09:01The guy by the window watched me come the whole way.
09:04Up close, I finally saw his face.
09:06Better than the photo.
09:07Not posed better.
09:08The kind of steady that makes a room lower its voice.
09:10I stopped in front of him.
09:12Can I have your number?
09:13Something moved behind his eyes.
09:15You dropped some weight and now you think anybody's going to look twice at you?
09:18Save it.
09:19I've known Wes two years.
09:20He has never once taken a girl's number.
09:21He rose slowly out of the booth.
09:23He's right.
09:24My chest caved in for one full second.
09:26Then he pulled out his phone, already unlocked, and closed the distance.
09:29I don't take girl's numbers.
09:30He put the phone in my hand.
09:32I hand her mine.
09:34Chloe's smile froze.
09:35He looked down at me and dropped his voice so only I could hear it.
09:38I've been waiting a year for you to walk over here.
09:42I hadn't typed a single digit before Zach repped the phone out of my hand.
09:45He planted himself between us.
09:46What the hell are you doing?
09:47You know she's my-
09:48He caught himself.
09:49I stepped closer.
09:50You're what?
09:51Finish it.
09:52Chloe's hand was still hooked through his arm.
09:54He glanced at her, then looked away fast.
09:56Your parents asked me to look out for you.
09:58I'm not letting you throw yourself at a guy who's run through half this campus.
10:01That was rich.
10:03The man who handed me off to a stranger for 12 months was lecturing me about being looked after.
10:07He came and stood beside me.
10:08Let's do this properly.
10:09Weston Ashford, number 12.
10:10Single, I don't play games.
10:11I don't juggle anybody.
10:12He turned to Zach without raising his voice at all.
10:14Whatever you think I am, I'm not it.
10:15Zach still wouldn't hand the phone back.
10:17Fine.
10:17I dug a lipstick out of my bag, took West's wrist and turned his forearm over.
10:20Don't help bend on Acrejir Shaman.
10:21He went shittedly under my hands.
10:22I wrote my number across his skin, one digit at a time.
10:24Bright red.
10:25I capped the lipstick and let go.
10:27There.
10:28You can't lose that one.
10:29He looked down at his own arm, then back up at me.
10:32I'll text you tonight.
10:33I turned to leave.
10:35At the door I stopped, looked back at the whole table, and smiled.
10:37By the way, that girlfriend he's been talking about all year?
10:40That was me.
10:41You're all welcome to do the math on when he started seeing her.
10:44Nobody said a word.
10:45I closed the door behind me.
10:48That night I was lying in bed when my phone buzzed.
10:51A new number.
10:51I smiled.
10:54Why would you think I'd give you a fake number?
10:57Because you're in love with Zach.
10:59I figured you just wanted to make him Jairus.
11:01My smile faded.
11:02That's probably what everyone thought.
11:03That no matter how he treated me, I'd keep chasing him.
11:06But when I typed the next line, there was nothing left in my chest.
11:09I don't love him anymore.
11:10Then who do you like now?
11:12I watched the cursor blink for a long time.
11:15Someone who's never lied to me.
11:17The second I hit send, my bedroom door slammed open.
11:19Zach stood there, chest heaving like he'd run the whole way.
11:22Are you texting him?
11:24Before I could answer, he crossed the room and yanked the phone out of my hand.
11:27His face went white, then red.
11:29You actually gave your number to Wes Oshberg?
11:32Give it back!
11:33You went to that dinner for him?
11:35Zach?
11:37Now.
11:37He threw the phone on the bed.
11:39Then he grabbed my wrist and backed me into the wall.
11:41He didn't let me finish.
11:43What are...
11:49What are...
11:52Then the shock cracked open into rage.
11:54I shoved him off and slapped him across the face.
11:57The sound was enormous in that small room.
12:00You used to beg me to kiss you.
12:03You would just a jam.
12:07A memory came up.
12:08He was walking ahead of me, several steps, suitcase in tow.
12:13Zach!
12:14Wait for me!
12:15I caught my foot on the edge of a floor mat and went down hard.
12:18He stopped.
12:18He looked around at the crowd first.
12:20Then he came back.
12:21Get up.
12:22It hurts.
12:23You're embarrassing yourself.
12:24My eyes filled.
12:25I looked up at him.
12:26Then kiss me.
12:27He glanced around one more time and bent down fast.
12:30His lips touched mine and were gone.
12:31Please!
12:32It didn't last a full second.
12:33There.
12:34Happy?
12:35That was our first kiss.
12:37It was also the only one.
12:39The memory let go.
12:40I scrubbed my sleeve across my mouth until it hurt.
12:43You're right.
12:44I did beg you to kiss me.
12:46It's the most humiliating thing I've ever done.
12:48His smirk died.
12:52He stared for two seconds, then laughed in disbelief.
12:56You're jealous.
12:58Same as when we were kids.
13:00Any girl talks to me and you sulk.
13:02Chloe's new here.
13:03She didn't know anyone at dinner.
13:04I was being nice.
13:05His voice went soft, like he was talking to a child.
13:08If you're jealous, just say so.
13:10He's only my shondi to do it.
13:11Why drag Wes into it?
13:12He's my best friend.
13:14Now I have to explain you to him so he doesn't get the wrong idea.
13:18He doesn't have the wrong idea.
13:20What?
13:21Zach frowned.
13:22You do.
13:23I walked past him and picked my phone up off the bed.
13:26I went to that dinner to find him.
13:28From the second I walked in, it was for him.
13:31The certainty drained out of his face in real time.
13:35We're done, Zach.
13:38He stood there like the words weren't in a language he spoke.
13:41You're breaking up with me?
13:44Yes.
13:45His expression went cold.
13:46Fine.
13:47He let out one short laugh.
13:49Honestly, I only ever said yes to you because I felt sorry for you.
13:51It landed exactly where he aimed it.
13:54He saw it, and the corner of his mouth curled.
13:57When Wes Ashford gets bored and drops you, don't come crying back to me.
14:00I stood there for a long time.
14:01I didn't want him back.
14:04I'd just finally done the math on ten years, spent loving someone who never once respected me.
14:09I didn't sleep.
14:11Just before dawn, I got dressed to go run.
14:13I opened the front door and stopped, holding a carefully wrapped box in both hands.
14:17Wes was standing beside his car at the end of my driveway, white shirt blazer over at 530 in the
14:20morning.
14:21His face was serious enough that I thought someone had died.
14:23What are you doing here?
14:24He held the box out.
14:25To prove something.
14:28Prove what?
14:30That I'm not whatever Zach says I am.
14:32I opened the box.
14:34A jersey, navy and gold.
14:37Ashford, 12, stitched across the back.
14:42A jersey doesn't prove anything.
14:44It proves you own a jersey.
14:46The corner of his mouth twitched.
14:49Then give me one day.
14:51Let me show you who I actually am.
14:53I should have said no.
14:55Everything I knew about him fit on one forearm in lipstick.
14:59You lied to me for a year.
15:01I know.
15:03I haven't forgiven you.
15:04I know.
15:05That's why I'm only asking for one.
15:06The wind came up the street.
15:08I looked at the box he'd obviously spent time wrapping, and something in me gave up.
15:11One day, he smiled.
15:13Something tugged into the back of my memory.
15:14Like a very long time ago, someone smiled at me exactly like that.
15:17I couldn't place it.
15:19He grabbed me and pulled me into that breakfast joint across from campus.
15:22He ordered for two and slid half across the table.
15:24I'm not hungry.
15:26You've been staring at that toast for 30 seconds.
15:27I took a bite, then three more.
15:31He didn't say anything.
15:32He just quietly ordered himself another plate.
15:34Then we went to the arcade.
15:36With total confidence, I've never lost anything involving a ball.
15:39I beat him six straight rounds on the basketball hoops.
15:42This machine is rigged.
15:43You're just bad at losing.
15:45No.
15:46I'm going again.
15:48Walking out, I realized I'd been laughing for a while.
15:51He went to get the car.
15:53While I waited, a girl bumped into me, and my phone hit the pavement.
15:57She bent to pick it up, and her fingers rested on the screen for a beat too long.
16:01You're the Josie?
16:02She was gone before I could answer.
16:05When the car pulled up, Wes tossed his jacket into the back seat.
16:08There was a folder on the seat.
16:10Small print across the cover.
16:12Ashford Capital.
16:14Family Foundation.
16:15He closed it without a word and slid it into the door pocket.
16:18My mom's.
16:19I said okay and didn't push.
16:21At my door, he nodded at the jersey under my arm.
16:23Home game Friday.
16:24Wear it.
16:24Come watch me play.
16:25Is that an invitation or an order?
16:27For now.
16:28After he drove off, stay away from Winston Ashford.
16:31You have no idea what his last name I didn't know, or who on this cantus is making sure
16:34he never played.
16:37Friday night.
16:38Home game.
16:38Packed stands.
16:39I sat behind the 40 in a jersey with Ashford 12 on the back.
16:43Zach was QB1.
16:44Number 7.
16:45Team captain.
16:46He played a beautiful first quarter.
16:47The whole stadium chanted his name.
16:50Wes was targeted twice all night.
16:52He caught both.
16:54At halftime, the alumner next to me shook his head.
16:5712's got the best hands on this roster.
16:59So why doesn't he get the ball?
17:01Because the chairman of the athletic board is named Whitmore.
17:05Four minutes left in the third.
17:06Hawks down by four.
17:08He ran a deep crossing route right to left, straight over the middle.
17:11He got open.
17:13Completely open.
17:17But Zach didn't throw.
17:20He waited.
17:21And then he put the ball up high.
17:24So high that Wes had to stretch every inch of himself to reach it.
17:28There's a name for that throw.
17:30A hospital ball.
17:31At the exact moment the safety's helmet went into his ribs.
17:34The whole stadium made one sound.
17:36He turned half over in the air and landed on his shoulder.
17:39The ball rolled loose.
17:43Everyone in the stadium stood at once.
17:45Sorry, sorry.
17:46I pushed down the bleachers to the railing.
17:47And that was when a phone lit up on the empty seat beside me.
17:50Wes's phone.
17:51He'd left it there before kickoff.
17:53Hold on.
17:54Ashford as in the Ashford?
17:55I looked down at that lit up screen.
17:57Then out at the field.
17:58The man they'd kept on the bench all season.
18:00The one who told me goodnight every night for a year.
18:03Who was he?
18:05The whistle screamed.
18:07The stands were already louder than the whistle.
18:08Wes pushed himself up.
18:09One hand clamped over his shoulder.
18:17He shoved Zach before he was even pulling upright.
18:20Zach swung first.
18:21It took four teammates and an official to pull them apart.
18:24Both were ejected.
18:26I went over the railing.
18:28But he looked at me first before the pain.
18:30Are you okay?
18:31Shoulder.
18:33Did you just jump off the bleeders?
18:34Don't talk.
18:36I ducked under his good arm.
18:37Behind us, Chloe ran to Zach.
18:40Ice!
18:41Give me ice!
18:41Zach barely looked at her.
18:43His eyes were locked on me.
18:44At the mouth of the tunnel, a man in a charcoal suit was waiting.
18:47An athletic board pin fixed to his lapel.
18:49He was looking at me.
18:50So you're the girl.
18:51Wes's hand tightened on my shoulder.
18:52Take care of that shoulder.
18:53You won't be needing it this season anyway.
18:56The morning, the video was everywhere.
18:57Then the throw.
18:58Then the hit.
19:00Underneath, someone had pasted my photo from a year ago next to a photo from last night.
19:04I posted one line to explain.
19:08Walking into the building, conversations stopped as I passed.
19:11A girl put her shoulder into my...
19:14Sorry.
19:15My books went everywhere.
19:16I crouched down and picked them up one at a time.
19:18I didn't cry.
19:21Then I walked into class and stopped.
19:23My desk had been dragged to the back row right against the trash cans.
19:26Every inch of it was covered in printed photos of me.
19:29All of them from before.
19:30I peeled them off one by one.
19:31By the last one, I folded it up and put it in my bag.
19:34I wanted to keep one.
19:36I want to know exactly who that girl is and how much effort it would take to get her off
19:40campus.
19:46Chloe came in with two friends behind her.
19:49Oh, look!
19:50Josie!
19:52You do something like that and then act shocked when people react?
19:55What if I told you I was never the other woman?
19:57You are.
19:58The room went dead silent.
19:59Her smile thinned.
20:00You lying little...
20:02Her hand came up.
20:03It never landed.
20:03Someone caught her wrist mid-swing.
20:07Wes, one arm still strapped in a sling.
20:10He threw it off.
20:11Touch her again and see what happens.
20:13Why are you protecting her?
20:14She came after you!
20:16No.
20:17Wes stepped fully between us.
20:19He looked at the photos on my desk.
20:22His jaw went tight, slowly.
20:24Then he raised his head and looked at everybody in the room.
20:26I pursued her.
20:27She didn't chase me.
20:28From the first day, the one doing the chasing was me.
20:32Chloe backed up and nearly hit a desk.
20:34Wes didn't look at her again.
20:36He took my hand with his uninjured arm and walked me out.
20:38Sure.
20:39Now you would.
20:40We stopped.
20:41Chloe folded her arms.
20:42She jerked her chin at the photos on my desk.
20:44Don't tell me you'd have gone anywhere near her when she looked like that.
20:48Everything in me locked up.
20:49For one second, I was back at the airport, begging for a kiss that didn't last a full second.
20:53He walked me out of the building and never looked back once.
20:56Wes's hand tightened around mine.
20:58I couldn't speak.
21:00Josie?
21:01At the car, he opened the passenger door for me.
21:03I didn't get in.
21:05My fingers closed on the front of his jacket.
21:08My throat closed.
21:09I made myself finish it.
21:10If I still looked like I did back then, would you have wanted to kiss me?
21:14He looked at my shaking mouth.
21:15Josie.
21:16He lifted his good hand and wiped under my eye.
21:19That is not your question to ask.
21:23Then whose is it?
21:26Mine.
21:27His eyes dropped to my mouth, then came back up.
21:29Can I kiss you?
21:32I nodded.
21:33He leaned in slowly, slow enough that I could have stepped back at any point.
21:37When his lips finally touched mine, something that had been wound tight in my chest for a
21:41year came undone.
21:42When he pulled back, I'd forgotten I'd ever wanted to cry.
21:44I'm sorry.
21:47For what?
21:49For not kissing you when you were 200 pounds.
21:52I laughed.
21:53Then I grabbed his collar and kissed him again.
21:55This time I went first.
21:56He kissed me back.
21:59Then his whole body went rigid.
22:01I opened my eyes.
22:02Zach was standing at the doors of the building.
22:04Half his face was a dark bruise.
22:06No idea how long he'd been there.
22:07He'd been watching the whole thing.
22:12Zach started walking toward us.
22:13Wes moved in front of me.
22:15Josie.
22:15Get in the car.
22:17Zach cut me off.
22:19What?
22:20Scared she'll hear the truth?
22:21Wes's good arm tightened around my shoulders.
22:23It was the first time I'd ever felt him nervous.
22:25You don't know, do you?
22:26You already knew him before that dinner.
22:28He pointed.
22:29He's the one who's been texting you all year.
22:31Zach looked straight at me.
22:33He let you think it was me.
22:35He lied to you from day one.
22:37Shut up!
22:38I caught his jacket and pulled him back.
22:39Wes.
22:39He stopped.
22:40He looked down at me.
22:41His jaw was locked.
22:42He was waiting for me to push him away.
22:43I just let go of his jacket.
22:45I already know.
22:46I know it was him.
22:48He stopped mid-sentence.
22:49His pupils shrank.
22:50What?
22:51I've known since the night of that dinner.
22:53His throat moved.
22:54The airport.
22:55You heard everything we said.
22:56Which part?
22:57I tilted my head.
22:58The part where I'm fat and clingy and exhausting?
23:00Or the part where you'd want to help me for years?
23:02His face changed.
23:03Or the part where you laughed about handing me off to a teammate for 12 months?
23:06Or the part where you kissed Chloe?
23:09There's one more thing I only worked out today.
23:13You knew he was falling for me.
23:15You knew the whole time.
23:16Every bit of color left his face.
23:18That's why you never took the phone back.
23:22As long as somebody kept me happy, I wouldn't ask questions and I wouldn't leave.
23:26I paused.
23:27You didn't hand me off to him.
23:29You kept us both on a leash.
23:32Zach had nothing.
23:33That was the moment I understood he genuinely thought he'd gotten away with it.
23:36So why say it now?
23:38Because you regret it?
23:38I want you, Josie.
23:40I screwed up, okay?
23:42I looked at him.
23:44I can't believe you can say that out loud.
23:46I'm apologizing!
23:49You loved me.
23:50Don't stand there and pretend you don't care.
23:52Do all this to your body for nothing?
23:53You did it so I'd claim you.
23:55But I actually want you now.
23:56What is it you want?
23:57There was nothing in my voice at all.
23:58My face?
23:59Or my body?
24:00You make me sick, Zach.
24:03He followed us the whole way across the lot.
24:06How is he any different?
24:06Wes went around to the driver's side.
24:08Zach grabbed the edge of my open window.
24:10I don't want you now because you're skinny now.
24:12If you still look like you used to, he wouldn't even-
24:15Wes kept his eyes on the road.
24:17I'm not like him.
24:19What?
24:19When you were 200 pounds.
24:21His fingers tightened on the wheel.
24:22I was already in love with you.
24:24I stared at him.
24:25That's not possible.
24:26You didn't even know what I looked like?
24:28I did.
24:29Before I could ask, my phone rang.
24:31It was a campus number.
24:32The dean of student's office wanted to see me at 9 the next morning.
24:35About what?
24:36The line paused.
24:37About a missing sum of money, Ms. Calloway.
24:40The Hawks Kids Fund.
24:42Last month's charity drive came up $11,000 short in cash.
24:47I knew that fund.
24:49Every season, the team raises money for the children's therapy center in town.
24:53I'd volunteered there since freshman year, because my mom works there.
24:57I don't understand what this house has to do with me.
24:59He slid the second page across.
25:01A cash box signature sheet from the day of the drive.
25:04Last line.
25:05My name.
25:06My handwriting.
25:09I didn't sign that.
25:10That's my name, but I didn't write it.
25:13There's also footage.
25:14A girl in a Hawks jersey walks into the equipment room and comes back out with the cash box.
25:19The jersey says Ashford 12.
25:20Exactly one person on this campus wears that jersey.
25:23I wasn't even on campus that day, and I couldn't prove it.
25:26He said, turning to the last page.
25:28Pending the investigation, your financial aid is suspended.
25:32So is your campus job.
25:34Without that aid, I couldn't register for next semester.
25:37Who filed this?
25:39Who hesitated?
25:40Mr. Whitmore.
25:41He chairs the athletic board and is also the honorary chair of the fund.
25:45Zach's father.
25:47There's one more thing.
25:48The therapy center's operating grant for next year has also been flagged for review.
25:53My fingers went white on the arm of the chair.
25:54That wasn't just my mother's job.
25:56That covers weekly rehab sessions for more than 40 kids.
25:59Can I ask something?
26:01He's willing to take down an entire clinic to get at one student.
26:03The associate looked down and closed the folder.
26:05Ms. Callowit, I didn't say anything.
26:08They're cutting off my financial aid because of his father.
26:13He isn't going to touch you.
26:15There's something I should have told you a long time ago.
26:18He drove to the other side of town.
26:20He stopped in front of a low brick building.
26:22A faded blue sign hung over the door.
26:24My chest tightened before I understood why.
26:27Do you remember this place?
26:28My mom works here.
26:29She volunteered here when I was little.
26:31I know.
26:33Operations funded in part by the Ashford Family Foundation.
26:37My family's foundation has funded this place for 19 years.
26:40Along with about half the athletic scholarships at Hawthorne.
26:45Including yours.
26:48You.
26:48Not me.
26:49That fund was set up before I could read.
26:51I have never had a say in who gets it.
26:53I saw your name on the list last year.
26:55That's all.
26:56For six years, Preston Whitworth has been trying to move that money into an account he controls.
27:01My father said no.
27:02He kept me on the bench for two years.
27:04To make my family reconsider.
27:06Everything clicked at once.
27:08Everyone said 12 had the best hands on the roster.
27:11Nobody knew why he never played.
27:13Why didn't you tell anyone?
27:15And say what?
27:18Nobody feels sorry for a guy named Ashford.
27:22So you just took it?
27:24I could take it.
27:26Then he came after you.
27:29That I'm not taking.
27:32There's one more thing.
27:3419 years ago, there was a kid in this building who wouldn't eat.
27:37They'd bring the tray in.
27:38He'd push it back out.
27:39One afternoon, a girl sat down across from him.
27:41She broke her own sandwich in half and put one half on his tray.
27:44Mine's better.
27:47The boy ate it.
27:48After that, she came every Saturday.
27:50She brought a brown teddy bear with one ear stitched in blue thread.
27:53Finish your food or I'm stealing every strawberry you've got.
27:56He got better.
27:57Then one Saturday, his room was empty.
27:59He never said goodbye.
28:01That was you.
28:04Years later, my best friend hands me a burner phone.
28:06I read your first message and just thought the name sounded familiar.
28:09Then I opened your profile picture.
28:11A brown teddy bear with one ear stitched in blue thread.
28:14I knew it was you before you ever told me your name.
28:16That's why I didn't stop.
28:17I know lying to you was wrong.
28:19I only meant to answer a few.
28:20Then one night, you apologized to me for being annoying.
28:23You said it like you actually believed it.
28:24I couldn't let you keep believing that.
28:27I'm still angry.
28:29I know.
28:31And I don't fully trust you yet.
28:33Then I'll earn it back one day at a time.
28:36Can we start over?
28:37No pretending.
28:38No lying.
28:39Just Weston and Josie.
28:41Then ask me properly.
28:44Josie Calloway.
28:46Will you be my girlfriend?
28:49Yes.
28:51There's a board dinner next Saturday.
28:53What color dress are you wearing?
28:55The Hawks annual donor gala took over the biggest ballroom on campus.
28:59Every board member, every booster, half the athletic department in black tie, I wore a dark red dress.
29:03The room went quiet for a few seconds when we walked in.
29:05Chloe was standing next to Zach with a champagne flooced.
29:07She smiled.
29:08She probably thought I'd come to beg.
29:09Preston Whitmore took the stage first.
29:11He was very good.
29:12Tradition, honor, responsibility.
29:14Then he slowed down.
29:15In light of a recent conduct investigation, the board has voted to formally revoke the financial aid of...
29:20Several hundred people turned to look at me.
29:22Miss Josie Calloway.
29:24There will be roster changes next season.
29:26Certain players have embarrassed this program.
29:28He didn't say Wes's name.
29:31Wes stood up before the applause could start.
29:35Let's talk about yours.
29:37The screen behind the stage lit up.
29:39Slide one.
29:40A transfer out of the Hawks Kids Fund into a company that exists only on paper.
29:46Slide two.
29:47Who registered that company?
29:50Slide three.
29:51An email.
29:52Whitmore instructing a department chair.
29:54Slide four.
29:55The raw file from the equipment room camera.
29:58That footage was cut.
30:00In the full version, the person in the jersey takes her hood down at the door.
30:04The image froze.
30:06The entire ballroom inhaled at once.
30:08It was Chloe Prescott's face.
30:10Her glass hit the carpet.
30:12That's my jersey.
30:13It went missing from my locker last month.
30:15I never reported it.
30:16I was waiting to see where it turned up.
30:18Preston's face went a deep, ugly red.
30:20Who the hell do you think you are, my f-
30:21Weston Ashford.
30:23He said it without changing his tone at all.
30:25My family's foundation funds half of this athletic program.
30:28As of tonight, not one dollar of it moves through any account of yours.
30:32Then a board member in the back stood up.
30:33Within the hour, Preston Whitweald was escorted out of his own gala.
30:37Zach didn't move.
30:38He just sat there and watched his father go.
30:39Then he raised his head and looked at me across the whole room.
30:42I didn't look away.
30:43I turned around and took Wes's hand.
30:47My aid was reinstated within a week.
30:49The therapy center's grant wasn't cut.
30:50It was doubled.
30:51Chloe Prescott was written up, thrown off every committee.
30:53Zach lost his captainship, lost his scholarship, and transferred three states away after finals.
30:57He sent me one message.
30:58I never opened it.
30:59The last home game of the season was on a very cold night in November.
31:01The Hawks had a new starter.
31:02Fourth quarter, under a minute, down three.
31:04He ran the exact same route as that night.
31:06Right side, straight across the middle.
31:07This time the ball came fast and low and hit him right in the chest.
31:08When he crossed the goal line, he pulled his helmet off.
31:10He didn't look at the scoreboard.
31:11He didn't look at his teammates.
31:11He turned around and found exactly where I was standing, in a stadium full of people.
31:15Three weeks later, he was waiting outside my last class of the semester, still wearing
31:19twelve under his jacket.
31:21He put a small box in my hand.
31:22Inside was a tiny hand-stitched teddy bear, one ear crooked, stitched in blue thread.
31:27Josie Bear.
31:29Nobody had called me that since I was seven years old.
31:31Seven, sitting across a hospital tray from a boy who wouldn't eat.
31:34He didn't have to ask this time.
31:36The answer had been his for a long time.
31:38That night, I took a folded photo out of my bag.
31:39Me, a year ago, round face, two milkshakes, the one with the red circle around my face.
31:44We flattened it out and taped it to the wall above my desk.
31:46She's me too.
31:47She was always worth it.
31:48Somebody finally did.