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Message sent: "I'm eighteen today! 🎉"
Read at 12:05 PM.
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In You Ignored My Birthday So I Erased Myself From The Family, watch the heartbreaking reality of a daughter who finally wakes up. While her siblings get steakhouse dinners and theme park trips, she gets an empty house and cold leftovers.
But turning 18 means freedom. 🧳
It’s time to pack the bags and leave them with the silence they gave her.
🌎For FULL HD Episodes on ReelShort site:🔗https://www.reelshort.com/movie/you-ignored-my-birthday-so-i-erased-myself-from-the-family-6aa14b83871c17602008654b
🍁Notice: The Rabbit Hole TV is an officially authorized publisher of ReelShort content.
Message sent: "I'm eighteen today! 🎉"
Read at 12:05 PM.
No replies. 🔕
In You Ignored My Birthday So I Erased Myself From The Family, watch the heartbreaking reality of a daughter who finally wakes up. While her siblings get steakhouse dinners and theme park trips, she gets an empty house and cold leftovers.
But turning 18 means freedom. 🧳
It’s time to pack the bags and leave them with the silence they gave her.
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:04these are yours your handwriting is so neat yeah please put them back i was just looking
00:00:10you're way too protective of this stuff she casually put the notebook back on the desk
00:00:14i glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing there was a blue one on the desk where
00:00:19is it i didn't touch it i didn't see it i searched for 10 minutes and finally found
00:00:23it in the trash can half the cover had been torn off and several pages inside were soaked
00:00:28with coffee the writing blurred into smears it was the problem-solving notebook i had been
00:00:32organizing since freshman year three years i only had that one copy ashley this oh maybe i knocked it
00:00:39over when i was carrying coffee just write another one i stood in the doorway holding the drenched
00:00:42notebook my hands shaking i took the notebook back to close room and dried it page by page with hair
00:00:51brewery where the writing was blurred i slowly filled it back in with a pencil
00:01:00i worked until one in the morning the next morning ashley sat in my old seat chatting happily
00:01:06with mom no one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark or what had happened last night
00:01:10and i no longer needed to wait for that one last time from that day on i began preparing to
00:01:17leave
00:01:17until the day i received my acceptance letter i knew the time had come to leave this house
00:01:21i packed my suitcase and bought a gray house ticket for the early dawn departure the next day
00:01:26the destination was pittsburgh then i walked to the door and placed my house key on the small
00:01:30entryway table i left the group chat and deactivated my old phone number
00:01:35the screen went dark the whole world suddenly became much quieter i pulled my suitcase open the door
00:01:43and closed it softly behind it
00:01:49ashley's the best place
00:01:53give her your room and share with chloe for now saturday morning mom said it casually while changing
00:01:58shoes by the door i was sitting at the dining table eating cereal my spoon stopped in midair
00:02:07why my room your room gets the best natural light ashley hasn't been feeling well lately and the
00:02:12doctor said more sunlight would be good for her ethan's room has a window too your brother is a boy
00:02:17ashley is a girl how could they share a room then let her stay with chloe chloe needs space to
00:02:22stretch
00:02:22at night your room only has a bed and a desk it's easy to clear out how long is she
00:02:26staying about half a
00:02:27month her summer program is over here i didn't argue anymore experience had taught me a long time
00:02:32ago that arguing was useless this family celebrates everyone's birthday
00:02:37everyone's birthday because my parents were a father to a civil race
00:02:41and he didn't know what he wanted to do
00:02:43and he even wanted to go on day one my parents woke up all the way
00:02:47and his favorite steakhouse was the last few months
00:02:50when it's the one he's doing and he wants to go to six hours
00:02:53and the whole family goes
00:02:54mom gave me a host to the info as a visitor mom loved him
00:02:58and he knew his house was on the streets and he went and he was watching me to take a
00:03:03different day
00:03:04and he knew that mom and mom had a lot of fun for her boys
00:03:06and he walked away and he sat in the room and he passed away and he passed away
00:03:11mom walked past me and he carried out for his dance floor
00:03:15he never went on the machine and he didn't know what he did as he was
00:03:19dad was walking to me and i was in the back yard
00:03:23ethan called him to go play basketball
00:03:24and at the park
00:03:25and the two of them left soon after
00:03:28at noon i was the only one left my house
00:03:31i sent a message in the family room chat
00:03:33i'm 18 today
00:03:36no one will die
00:03:37at 7 that night everybody came home
00:03:39no one sang
00:03:40no one felt like anything was missing
00:03:43i was 18 now
00:03:45at last i could decide for myself where i wanted to go
00:03:49mallory
00:03:50delete that message from the group chat
00:03:52i almost missed grandpa's voice message
00:03:55ethan didn't even look up
00:03:58he tapped the edge of his plate
00:03:59lightly with his dinner knife
00:04:01signaling mom
00:04:02to give him more ribs
00:04:05i looked down at my phone
00:04:07the message in the family chat
00:04:09i'm 18 today
00:04:10was still sitting there
00:04:11no one had replied
00:04:14mom came over with a plate of garlic bread
00:04:17and set it in the middle of the table
00:04:20all right
00:04:22no phones at dinner
00:04:24i looked at the food on the table
00:04:27ethan liked ribs
00:04:28chloe liked mac and cheese
00:04:30mom had made the salad for herself
00:04:32not a single dish was for me
00:04:34i liked seafood
00:04:37grilled salmon was my favorite
00:04:39i had said it so many times
00:04:41no one in this family remembered
00:04:44dad
00:04:45today
00:04:47dad set down his iced tea
00:04:49and glanced at me
00:04:51the next second
00:04:52he turned back to eat them
00:04:53how's your wrist from basketball this afternoon
00:04:55does the sprain still hurt
00:04:57it's okay
00:04:58shoot
00:04:59it aches a little when i shoot
00:05:00i'll take you to a sports therapist tomorrow
00:05:02my words died in midair
00:05:06i finished dinner quietly
00:05:07and went to wash the dishes
00:05:09i turned the faucet on high
00:05:13from the living room came the sound of chloe practicing ballet basics
00:05:16her toes landing against the floor one by one
00:05:19mom counted means beside her
00:05:21ethan was playing xbox in his room
00:05:23shouting every few minutes
00:05:24dad was on the couch with his ipad
00:05:26everyone in this house had something of their own
00:05:29everyone had someone answering them
00:05:33except me
00:05:35i stood in the kitchen
00:05:36washing platelets and cups
00:05:38for five people
00:05:40the water was loud
00:05:42loud enough that even if i cried
00:05:44no one would hear
00:05:51it was the only happy birthday i had received all day
00:05:54from a classmate i had known for less than a year
00:05:56i replied thank you
00:05:58then i opened my photo album and kept scrolling back
00:06:00after i turned six
00:06:02mom's camera had almost completely turned toward them
00:06:05most of the photos were of them
00:06:06i scrolled for a long time before i finally found one
00:06:09it was from when i was nine
00:06:11and had entered the school speech contest
00:06:13mom had taken it from the audience
00:06:15the photo was blurry
00:06:16only half my body was in it
00:06:18because the other half of the frame
00:06:20was chloe in the front row
00:06:22turning back toward the camera with a bright smile
00:06:25i stood off stage in front of the microphone
00:06:28my face barely visible
00:06:30the phone screen dimmed
00:06:32and my face appeared in the black reflection
00:06:3518 year old now
00:06:37i i'm a little bit of my face
00:06:37i.e. she couldn't come to me
00:06:39but i felt it
00:06:40and i still had gotten to see the present
00:06:43the mom's voice came from outside the door
00:06:47the mom's voice came from outside the door
00:06:48the mom's voice came from their faces
00:06:48and the tweeter's voice up to her
00:06:49what i can't believe
00:06:51and she is trying to read
00:06:52and i can't believe that
00:06:57i can't believe that
00:06:58the mom's voice came from outside the door
00:06:59the mom's voice came from outside the door
00:07:00and now we live with her own love
00:07:01she stood in my doorway
00:07:03with women
00:07:03to move her hair all the time
00:07:05I checked my phone. 6.23. My alarm had never gone off.
00:07:10You look by yourself.
00:07:12Yeah, I'm good.
00:07:13I sat in the alarm.
00:07:15Mom told you to wake me, but I was afraid you didn't sleep well last night.
00:07:19She said it so casually, but I wouldn't still stop.
00:07:23She knew I hadn't slept well last night.
00:07:25I'll help you tie your hair.
00:07:28No, that's fine. I can do it.
00:07:32She turned and left.
00:07:35Chloe had always been like that with me.
00:07:38She wasn't cool.
00:07:39She just wasn't close.
00:07:42She called me sis, but the word carried no weight.
00:07:46The twins had their own rhythm, and I had never been able to enter it.
00:07:51At breakfast, Mom was warming milk for Chloe.
00:07:54Ethan wasn't up yet.
00:07:56Mally, have you eaten?
00:07:58I have.
00:07:59I hadn't.
00:08:01She didn't even check whether there was a bowl I'd used on the table.
00:08:04She just nodded.
00:08:05Chloe, did you pack your water bottle?
00:08:07It's hot today.
00:08:08Drink more water.
00:08:10I did.
00:08:12Mally, drive your sister there.
00:08:14She still doesn't know the stops near the training center.
00:08:16Chloe had been going to that training center for two years.
00:08:20Mom still said she didn't know the way.
00:08:23Okay.
00:08:24As we were leaving, Ethan finally got up and called from his doorway.
00:08:29Mom, what's for breakfast?
00:08:31I left you a bagel and yogurt on the table.
00:08:34A bagel and yogurt.
00:08:36Ethan's regular breakfast.
00:08:39No one had ever asked what I wanted in the morning.
00:08:42On the way to the training center, Chloe sat in the passenger seat scrolling through her phone.
00:08:47She wasn't trying to be cold.
00:08:50It just never occurred to her to talk to me.
00:08:56When she suddenly spoke, my palm tightened on the wheel.
00:09:00What?
00:09:02That message you sent in the group chat yesterday?
00:09:05Ethan told you to delete it?
00:09:07Yeah.
00:09:09Did you?
00:09:11No.
00:09:13She nodded, then lowered her head to look at her phone again.
00:09:17I waited for a long time, waiting for her to say, happy birthday.
00:09:21She didn't.
00:09:22When we reached the training center, she unbuckled her seatbelt.
00:09:26Sis, I'm here.
00:09:28Yeah.
00:09:29Train hard.
00:09:30Can you pick me up this afternoon? I finish at five.
00:09:32I have a study group this afternoon.
00:09:35That was a lie.
00:09:36I had nothing this afternoon.
00:09:37I just didn't want to go.
00:09:39Then I'll ask mom to pick me up.
00:09:41Okay.
00:09:42At 4.50 that afternoon, mom sent a message in the family group chat.
00:09:47Chloe finishes screening at five.
00:09:49He took her up.
00:09:50I'm at a friend's house.
00:09:52Mallory, aren't you free this afternoon?
00:09:54I looked at that message.
00:09:56She started with who can pick her up, but in the end it still landed on me.
00:10:00It's on your way anyway, right?
00:10:01Just go pick her up.
00:10:02It wasn't on my way at all, but in this family, my road was always on the way.
00:10:06My time was always free.
00:10:08I typed okay and sent it.
00:10:10Then I turned my phone face down on the desk.
00:10:14Suddenly, I wondered,
00:10:17what would happen if one day I didn't reply with okay?
00:10:21If I turned off my phone, canceled my number, and disappeared too?
00:10:26Would they first panic because no one could pick up Chloe?
00:10:29Or would they think of me first?
00:10:31I knew the answer.
00:10:32When I picked Chloe up, her face was flushed from training.
00:10:35Your hair was getting wet, but I went to see a sphere of pain.
00:10:39Where's your water?
00:10:40I'm going to have to do it.
00:10:41I thought she was just fearful.
00:10:43I wanted to have a heart attack.
00:10:44It was just a shadow.
00:10:46All the way home, she seemed to fall asleep against them.
00:10:48I adjusted the air conditioner for two colors.
00:10:51She was the man who was just a man.
00:10:53A heart attack.
00:10:54I thought you were drunk and drunk and drunk and drunk.
00:10:57But not for much longer.
00:10:59You are not one after one.
00:11:01All colleges.
00:11:02I'll get into it.
00:11:04I'm okay.
00:11:04So I'm so proud to have you.
00:11:06I'm on a place on the national campus.
00:11:09It's impressive.
00:11:10I'll go back and get your way into it.
00:11:12It's just because you're doing good.
00:11:13I'm still okay.
00:11:15What do your parents like?
00:11:17I have a toilet now.
00:11:18Something is important.
00:11:19And you're not discussing it with your family first.
00:11:22I want to look into it myself first.
00:11:24I knew that even if I toyed that, no one would take it seriously.
00:11:27On last month's mock exam, I ranked 30 in the entire grade.
00:11:30I took a photo of my report card and sent it to the family group chat.
00:11:32My third place rankings stayed in the chat for only a very short while.
00:11:35All it got from mom was one sentence.
00:11:37Not bad.
00:11:37The next message was a video mom sent of Chloe dancing.
00:11:40That afternoon, when I got home, I found a dusty letter among a pile of bills and flyers on the
00:11:45coffee table.
00:11:46It said, Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Hayes.
00:11:48Your daughter, Mallory Hayes, has received an honorable mention in the National High School Mathematics Olympiad.
00:11:53Two months had passed.
00:11:55The envelope hadn't even been opened.
00:11:56It was tucked between bills and pizza courons, completely forgotten.
00:12:00At dinner, mom answered a FaceTime call from my aunt.
00:12:03My aunt asked about Ethan's swim meet.
00:12:05Mom said he had taken second place in the district, pride filling her voice.
00:12:09My aunt asked about Chloe's dance competition.
00:12:11Mom said she had won gold at regionals, and the judges had praised how steady she was off dyes.
00:12:16How's Mallory?
00:12:17She's applying to college soon too, right?
00:12:20She's doing fine.
00:12:22Third in my grade, a National Math Olympiac award.
00:12:25In mom's mouth, all of it became doing fine.
00:12:28I sat at the dining table, still holding the award letter that had been forgotten for two months.
00:12:32No one asked how I had been lately.
00:12:34No one turned to me and said, Mallory, what about you?
00:12:36I went back to my room, opened my laptop, and started looking up colleges that would actually care about competition
00:12:41backgrounds.
00:12:42In the end, I stopped at Carnegie Mellon.
00:12:44Hundreds of miles away from home, no one would remember me, only when they needed someone to pick up my
00:12:48sister.
00:12:49I opened the application page.
00:12:50My fingers hovered over the screen for three seconds before I finally closed it.
00:12:56I decided to try one more time.
00:12:58If they still couldn't see me this time, I would leave.
00:13:02Completely.
00:13:05Mallory, Ashley has come to stay with us for a while.
00:13:10Give her your room and share with Chloe for now.
00:13:12Saturday morning, mom said it casually while changing shoes by the door.
00:13:16I was sitting at the dining table getting cereal.
00:13:19My spoon stopped at mid-air.
00:13:24Why my room?
00:13:25Your room gets the best natural light.
00:13:28Ashley hasn't been feeling well lately.
00:13:29The doctor said more sunlight than we could for her.
00:13:31Ethan's room has a window, too.
00:13:33Your brother is a boy, Ashley is a girl.
00:13:35How can they share with you?
00:13:36Then let her stay with Chloe.
00:13:38Chloe needs space to stretch it.
00:13:40Your room only has a bed and a desk that's easy to clear up.
00:13:42How long does she stay?
00:13:43About half a month.
00:13:44Her summer program is over here.
00:13:46I didn't argue.
00:13:46The experience had taught a long time going on your own resources.
00:13:50That afternoon, Ashley came in dragging two large suitcases, smiling sweetly.
00:13:58Auntie? Uncle?
00:13:59You're here!
00:14:00You're here!
00:14:01Come in!
00:14:02Mom was so warm, as if an important guest had arrived.
00:14:06Ashley pushed her suitcases into my room and looked around from the doorway.
00:14:10Auntie, can this bookshelf be moved out?
00:14:13I want to put a vanity mirror here.
00:14:15Of course.
00:14:17Mallory, move the bookshelf out.
00:14:19On my bookshelf were three years of notebooks, reference books, and a few certificates.
00:14:24It took me an hour to move everything into a corner of Chloe's room.
00:14:28That night, I laid a mattress on the floor of Chloe's room.
00:14:33Sis, why don't you sleep on the bed?
00:14:35I'll sleep on the floor.
00:14:37I know.
00:14:38I know.
00:14:38I'm sorry.
00:14:39I know.
00:14:40Ashley's actually okay.
00:14:41I'm not going to upset me.
00:14:44Ashley's never going to upset me.
00:14:46What hurts is that in this house?
00:14:49I was always the one who expected to give away.
00:14:52On the third day, I left out to be able to give away two years.
00:14:56And the door was Ashley's looking for a national competition.
00:14:59I was nervous.
00:15:01I had to see you.
00:15:02Yeah.
00:15:03As we go back, I was looking in a way to protect her.
00:15:07She casually put the mirror back from the desk.
00:15:10I glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing.
00:15:13There was a blue one on the desk.
00:15:14Where is it?
00:15:15I don't touch it.
00:15:15I don't see it.
00:15:17I searched for ten minutes and finally found it in the trash can.
00:15:20Half the cover had been torn off.
00:15:22And several pages inside were soaked with coffee.
00:15:24The writing carried into smears.
00:15:26It was the problem solving notebook I had been organizing since freshman year.
00:15:29Three years.
00:15:30I only had that one copy.
00:15:31Ashley.
00:15:32This.
00:15:33Oh, maybe I knocked it over when I was carrying coffee.
00:15:35Just write another one.
00:15:36I stood in the doorway holding the drenched notebook, my hands shaking.
00:15:43I took the notebook back to Chloe's room and dried it page by page with a hair broyer.
00:15:49Where the writing was blurred, I slowly filled it back in with a pencil.
00:15:55I worked until one in the morning.
00:15:58The next morning, Ashley sat in my old seat, chatting happily with mom.
00:16:02No one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark or what had happened last night.
00:16:06And I no longer needed to wait for that one last time.
00:16:10From that day on, I began preparing to leave until the day I received my acceptance letter.
00:16:14I knew the time had come to leave this house.
00:16:17I packed my suitcase and bought a Greyhouse ticket for the early dawn departure the next day.
00:16:21The destination was Pittsburgh.
00:16:23Then I walked to the door and placed my house key on the small entryway table.
00:16:26I left the group chat and deactivated my old phone number.
00:16:30The screen went dark.
00:16:32The whole world suddenly became much quieter.
00:16:36I pulled my suitcase, opened the door, and closed it softly behind me.
00:16:48These are yours?
00:16:49Your handwriting is so good.
00:16:51Yeah.
00:16:52Please put them back.
00:16:53I was just looking.
00:16:54You're way too protective of this stuff.
00:16:55She casually put the notebook back on the desk.
00:16:58I glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing.
00:17:01There was a blue one on the desk.
00:17:03Where is it?
00:17:03I didn't touch it.
00:17:04I didn't see it.
00:17:05I searched for ten minutes and finally found it in the trash can.
00:17:09Half the cover had been torn off, and several pages inside were soaked with coffee.
00:17:13The writing blurred into smears.
00:17:14It was the problem-solving notebook I had been organizing since freshman year.
00:17:18Three years.
00:17:18I only had that one coffee.
00:17:20Ashley?
00:17:21This?
00:17:22Oh, maybe I knocked it over when I was carrying coffee.
00:17:24Just write another one.
00:17:24I stood in the doorway holding the drenched notebook, my hands shaking.
00:17:31I took the notebook back to Chloe's room and dried it page by page with a hair broiler.
00:17:38Where the writing was blurred, I slowly filled it back in with a pencil.
00:17:44I worked until one in the morning.
00:17:46The next morning, Ashley sat in my eyes, chatting happily.
00:17:50No one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark, or what had happened last night.
00:17:54And I no longer needed to wait for that one last time.
00:17:58From that day on, I began preparing to leave, until the day I received my acceptance letter.
00:18:03I knew the time had come to leave this house.
00:18:05I packed my suitcase and bought a Greyhouse ticket for the early dawn departure the next day.
00:18:10The destination was Pittsburgh.
00:18:11Then I walked to the door and placed my house key on the small entryway table.
00:18:15I left the group chat and deactivated my old phone number.
00:18:19The screen went dark.
00:18:21The whole world suddenly became much quieter.
00:18:25I pulled my suitcase, opened the door, and closed it softly behind me.
00:18:32Mallory, Ashley is coming to stay with us for a while.
00:18:37Give her hand.
00:18:38Sure.
00:18:39Saturday morning, Mops let it catch one of her changing shoes at the door.
00:18:43I was sitting at the dining table.
00:18:45I stayed at home.
00:18:46My spoon stopped at the air.
00:18:51Why my room?
00:18:52I was a super patient.
00:18:54I was sitting there with a doctor so I could have started getting it.
00:18:58I was sitting there with a doctor.
00:18:58In 2012, your brother was sitting there with a doctor, and she was sitting there with a heart
00:19:02of a chair.
00:19:03She took a whole night to stay at home.
00:19:04Chloe was saying to stretch a lot.
00:19:06My husband, my husband, doesn't know how long she stayed, and about half a month or something
00:19:11of the parents were doing.
00:19:13I didn't argue her.
00:19:14Experience and talk a long time ago that arguing was useless.
00:19:18This family celebrates everyone's birthday.
00:19:21Everyone's but mom
00:19:22Because my parents only love my twin siblings
00:19:24They give me Chloe
00:19:25They don't love me
00:19:27When Ethan wants a birthday party
00:19:29My parents book a private room at his favorite steakhouse in London Fades
00:19:34When it's Chloe's turn, she wants to go to Six Flags
00:19:37The whole family goes
00:19:38Mom even posts nine photos on Instagram
00:19:41But on my birthday
00:19:42This house always treats it like any other day
00:19:45I thought turning 18 would be different
00:19:48That morning, I got up early on purpose
00:19:50Put on light makeup
00:19:51And sat on the living room couch to wait
00:19:55Mom walked past me on her way out
00:19:56Carrying Chloe's dance bag
00:19:58Heat up your own lunch
00:20:00I'm taking Chloe to her intensive class
00:20:03Dad was watering tomatoes in the backyard
00:20:06Ethan called him to go play basketball at the park
00:20:09And the two of them left soon after
00:20:11At noon, I was the only one left in the house
00:20:15I sent a message in the family group chat
00:20:17Dad, I'm 18 today
00:20:19No one replied
00:20:20At seven that night, everybody came home
00:20:23No one sang
00:20:24No one felt like anything was missing
00:20:27I was 18 now
00:20:29At last, I could decide for myself where I wanted to go
00:20:33Mallory, delete that message from the group chat
00:20:36I almost misgrammed his voice message
00:20:39Ethan didn't even look up
00:20:41He tapped the edge of his plate
00:20:43Lightly with his dinner knife
00:20:45Signaling mom to give him more ribs
00:20:49I looked down at my phone
00:20:51The message in the family chat
00:20:53I'm 18 today, I'm still sitting there
00:20:55No one had replied
00:20:58Mom came over with a plate of garlic bread
00:21:00And set it in the middle of the table
00:21:04Alright
00:21:06No phones at dinner
00:21:08I looked at the food on the table
00:21:11Ethan liked ribs
00:21:12Chloe liked mac and cheese
00:21:14Mom had made the salad for herself
00:21:16Not a single dish was for me
00:21:18I liked seafood
00:21:21Grilled salmon was my favorite
00:21:23I had said it so many times
00:21:24No one in this family remembered me
00:21:28Dad, today
00:21:31Dad sat down his iced tea
00:21:32And glanced at me
00:21:34The next second, he turned back to him
00:21:37How's your risk for basketball this afternoon?
00:21:39Does this brain still work?
00:21:41It's okay
00:21:42Shoot
00:21:43It aches a little when I shoot
00:21:44I think it was worse than that
00:21:46My words died in my head
00:21:49I finished dinner quietly
00:21:51And went to wash the dishes
00:21:53I turned the faucet on high
00:21:57From the living room came the sound of Chloe practicing ballet basics
00:22:00Her toes landing against the floor one by one
00:22:02Mom counted beats beside her
00:22:04Ethan was playing Xbox in his room
00:22:07Shouting every few minutes
00:22:08Dad was on the couch with his iPad
00:22:10Everyone in this house had something of their own
00:22:12Everyone had someone answering them
00:22:17Except me
00:22:19I stood in the kitchen
00:22:20Washing platelets and cups for five people
00:22:24The water was loud
00:22:25Loud enough that even if I cried
00:22:28No one would hear
00:22:29After the dishes I went back to my room
00:22:31And shut the door
00:22:32My phone lit up
00:22:33It was a message in the class group chat
00:22:35It was the only happy birthday I could see it all day
00:22:38When I had a classmate
00:22:39I had a phone call
00:22:39I had a phone call
00:22:40I had a phone call
00:22:41I had a phone call
00:22:42Then I opened a phone call
00:22:43And kept the door in my life
00:22:44After I had two weeks
00:22:46Mom's camera had her
00:22:47Thanks to the camera
00:22:48To the camera
00:22:49Most of her photos were in bed
00:22:50I swirled it for a long time
00:22:52Before I finally found out
00:22:53It was wrong
00:22:54It was wrong when I was not
00:22:55After the social speech contest
00:22:57Mom had taken my phone call
00:22:59The photo was closed
00:23:00And half my body was in bed
00:23:02Because the other half of the bed
00:23:04Was closed in front of the other
00:23:06Turning back to the camera
00:23:08And the red smell
00:23:09I stood off stage
00:23:11In front of the microphone
00:23:12With my face very visible
00:23:14The phone screen dipped
00:23:16And my face appeared
00:23:17In a black reflection
00:23:19The 18 year old Mallory
00:23:20Eight since about the full morning
00:23:22Putting on makeup
00:23:23Waited all day
00:23:24And still hadn't gotten
00:23:25A single happy birthday
00:23:26Mom's voice came from outside the door
00:23:31Mallory?
00:23:32Wait your sister at 7 to the morning
00:23:35She has training in April
00:23:38Okay
00:23:41Hey sis
00:23:42It's 7
00:23:44Chloe had woken up on her own
00:23:45She stood in my doorway
00:23:47In a pink leotard
00:23:48Her hair half tied
00:23:49I checked my phone
00:23:506.53
00:23:51My alarm hadn't even gone off
00:23:54You got up by yourself?
00:23:56Yeah
00:23:57I set an alarm
00:23:59Mom told you to wake me
00:24:00But I was afraid
00:24:01You didn't sleep well last night
00:24:03She said it so casually
00:24:05But the words still stung
00:24:06She knew I hadn't slept well last night
00:24:09I'll help you tie your hair
00:24:11No, it's fine
00:24:13I can do it
00:24:16She turned and left
00:24:19Chloe had always been like that with me
00:24:22She wasn't cruel
00:24:23She just wasn't close
00:24:26She called me sis
00:24:27But the word carried no weight
00:24:30The twins had their own rhythm
00:24:32And I had never been able to enter it
00:24:34At breakfast
00:24:35Mom was warming up for Chloe
00:24:37Ethan wasn't up yet
00:24:40Mally
00:24:40Have you met me?
00:24:42I have
00:24:42I haven't
00:24:44She didn't even check whether there was a bowl I'd used on the table
00:24:47She just nodded
00:24:48Chloe
00:24:49Did you pack your water bottle?
00:24:51It's hot today
00:24:52Drink more water
00:24:54I did
00:24:55Mally
00:24:56Drive your sister there
00:24:57She still doesn't know the stops near the training center
00:25:00Chloe had been going to that training center for two years
00:25:03Mom still said
00:25:05She didn't know the way
00:25:06Okay
00:25:08As we were leaving
00:25:09Ethan finally got up
00:25:10And called from his doorway
00:25:12Mom, what's for breakfast?
00:25:15I left you a bagel and yogurt on the table
00:25:18A bagel and yogurt
00:25:20Ethan's regular breakfast
00:25:22No one had ever asked what I wanted before
00:25:25On the way to the training center
00:25:28Chloe sat in the passenger seat scrolling through her phone
00:25:31She wasn't trying to be cold
00:25:33It just never occurred to her
00:25:35To talk to me
00:25:38Sis
00:25:40When she suddenly spoke
00:25:41My palm tightened on the wheel
00:25:44What?
00:25:46That message you sent in the group chat yesterday
00:25:48Ethan told you to go away
00:25:51Yeah
00:25:53Did you?
00:25:55No
00:25:57She nodded
00:25:58Then lowered her head to look at her phone again
00:26:00I waited for a long time
00:26:02Waiting for her to say
00:26:03Happy birthday
00:26:04She didn't
00:26:06When we reached the training center
00:26:08She unbuckled her seatbelt
00:26:10Sis, I'm here
00:26:12Yeah
00:26:12Train hard
00:26:13Can you pick me up this afternoon?
00:26:15I finish at 5
00:26:16I have a study group this afternoon
00:26:18That was a lie
00:26:19I had nothing this afternoon
00:26:21I just didn't want to go
00:26:22Then I'll ask mom to pick me up
00:26:24Okay
00:26:26At 4.50 that afternoon
00:26:28Mom sent a message in the family group chat
00:26:31Chloe finishes training at 5
00:26:32Who can pick her up?
00:26:34I'm in a meeting
00:26:34I'm at a friend's house
00:26:36I'm Mallory
00:26:37Aren't you afraid of this afternoon?
00:26:38I looked at that message
00:26:40She started with who can pick her up
00:26:42But in the end it still landed on me
00:26:43It's on your way anyway, right?
00:26:45You spoke and threw up
00:26:46It wasn't my way at all
00:26:47But in this family my word was always on board
00:26:50My time was always on board
00:26:52I typed okay and accepted
00:26:54Then I turned my phone face down on the desk
00:26:58Suddenly
00:26:59I wondered
00:27:00What would happen
00:27:02If one day
00:27:03I didn't apply for care
00:27:05If I turned on my phone
00:27:07Canceled my number
00:27:08And disappeared too
00:27:09Would they first panic
00:27:11Because it only would pick up Chloe
00:27:13Or would they pick up me first?
00:27:15I knew the answer
00:27:16When I picked Chloe up
00:27:17Her face was flushed from training
00:27:19And her hair was damp
00:27:21Sis
00:27:22Where's your water bottle?
00:27:25I handed her the spare bottle of water
00:27:27In the car
00:27:27On the way home
00:27:30She soon fell asleep against the window
00:27:32I adjusted the air conditioning
00:27:33So the car wouldn't be secured
00:27:35She was the little princess
00:27:36Everyone involved in
00:27:38And most of the roads I had driven through this city
00:27:40Had been for someone else
00:27:41But not for much longer
00:27:43Not long after
00:27:44The school college counselor
00:27:46Called me into her office
00:27:47Mallory Hayes
00:27:48I saw your awards record
00:27:50Honorable Ments in the National Math Olympias
00:27:52That's impressive
00:27:53Awards like that carry real weight
00:27:55Which schools are you considering for early applications?
00:27:58I'm still looking
00:27:59What do your parents think?
00:28:00I haven't told them yet
00:28:02Something this important
00:28:03And you're not discussing it with your family first?
00:28:06I want to look into it myself first
00:28:08I knew that even if I told them
00:28:09No one would take it seriously
00:28:11On last month's mock examen
00:28:12I ranked third in the entire grade
00:28:14I took a photo of my report card
00:28:15And sent it to the family group chat
00:28:16My third place ranking stayed in the chat
00:28:17For only a very short while
00:28:19All it got from mom was one sentence
00:28:20Not bad
00:28:21The next message
00:28:22Was a video mom sent of Chloe dancing
00:28:24That afternoon
00:28:24When I got home
00:28:25I found a dusty letter
00:28:27Among a pile of bills and flyers
00:28:28On the coffee table
00:28:29It said
00:28:30Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Hayes
00:28:32Your daughter Mallory Hayes
00:28:34Has received an honorable mention
00:28:35In the National High School Mathematics
00:28:37Two months had passed
00:28:38The envelope had never been opened
00:28:40It was tucked between bills and pizza courants
00:28:42Completely forgotten
00:28:44At dinner
00:28:44Mom answered a FaceTime call from my aunt
00:28:46My aunt asked about Anthony's swim meet
00:28:48Mom said he had taken second place in the district
00:28:51Pride filling in her voice
00:28:52My aunt asked about Chloe's dance competition
00:28:54Mom said she had won gold at regionals
00:28:57And the judges had praised how steady she was off times
00:28:59How's Mallory?
00:29:01She's applying to college soon too, right?
00:29:04She's doing fine
00:29:06Third in my grade
00:29:07A National Math Olympiac Award
00:29:09In mom's mouth all of it became doing fine
00:29:11I sat at the dining table
00:29:13Still holding the award letter
00:29:14That had been forgotten for two months
00:29:15No one asked how I had been lately
00:29:17No one turned to me and said
00:29:19Mallory, what about you?
00:29:20I went back to my room
00:29:21Opened my laptop
00:29:22And started looking up colleges
00:29:23That would actually care about competition backgrounds
00:29:25In the end
00:29:26I stopped at Carnegie Mellon
00:29:27Hundreds of miles away from home
00:29:29No one would remember me
00:29:30Only when they needed someone to pick up my sister
00:29:32I opened the application page
00:29:34My fingers hovered over the screen for three seconds
00:29:37Before I finally closed it
00:29:39I decided to try one more time
00:29:41If they still couldn't see me this time
00:29:43I would leave
00:29:46Completely
00:29:49Mallory
00:29:50She's going to stay with us for a while
00:29:53Give her your room and share with Chloe for now
00:29:56Saturday morning
00:29:57Mom said it casually while changing shoes by the door
00:30:00I was sitting at the dining table eating cereal
00:30:02My spoon stopped in mid-air
00:30:08Why my room?
00:30:09Your room gets the best natural light
00:30:11Ashley hasn't been feeling well lately
00:30:13And the doctor said more sunlight would be good for her
00:30:15Ethan's room has a window too
00:30:16Your brother is a boy, Ashley is a girl
00:30:18How could they share a room?
00:30:20Then let her stay with Chloe
00:30:21Chloe needs space to stretch at night
00:30:23Your room only has a bed and a desk
00:30:25It's easy to clear out
00:30:26How long is she staying?
00:30:27About half a month
00:30:28Her summer program is over here
00:30:29Okay
00:30:30I didn't argue anymore
00:30:31Experience had taught me a long time ago
00:30:33That arguing was useless
00:30:34That afternoon
00:30:36Ashley came to drive you to the large suitcase
00:30:38And set a smiley sweet
00:30:41Auntie
00:30:42Auntie
00:30:42You're here!
00:30:44You're here!
00:30:44You're here!
00:30:46Mom was so bored
00:30:47Is it an important guest in your life?
00:30:50Ashley launched her suitcase
00:30:51And she's running around the doorway
00:30:53Auntie
00:30:54Can this bookshelf you now?
00:30:57I want to put your vanity in here
00:30:58I want to put your vanity in here
00:31:00Do it close
00:31:00No
00:31:06It took me an hour to be ready
00:31:10To and to a corner of the clothes room
00:31:11That night
00:31:12I laid a mattress on the floor of the clothes room
00:31:15And I want to put your vanity in here
00:31:17And sit down
00:31:17Why don't you sit on the bed?
00:31:19I'll sit on the floor
00:31:21No
00:31:21The floor is fine
00:31:23Ashley is actually ok
00:31:25Don't be upset
00:31:27Ashley is never going to upset me
00:31:30What hurt was that in this house, I was always the one expected to give way.
00:31:36On the third day, I went back to my room to get review materials and opened the door to find
00:31:41Ashley flipping through my math competition notes.
00:31:43These are yours? Your handwriting is so neat.
00:31:46Yeah. Please put them back.
00:31:48I was just looking. You're way too protective of this stuff.
00:31:51She casually put the notebook back on the desk.
00:31:53I glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing.
00:31:56There was a blue one on the desk. Where is it?
00:31:58I didn't touch it. I didn't see it.
00:32:00I searched for ten minutes and finally found it in the trash can.
00:32:04Half the cover had been torn off, and several pages inside were soaked with coffee.
00:32:08The writing blurred into smears.
00:32:09It was the problem-solving notebook I had been organizing since freshman year.
00:32:13Three years. I only had that one copy.
00:32:15Ashley, this? Oh, maybe I knocked it over when I was carrying coffee. Just write another one.
00:32:20I stood in the doorway holding the drenched notebook, my hands shaking.
00:32:26I took the notebook back to Chloe's room and dried it page by page with a hair broyer.
00:32:33Where the writing was blurred, I slowly filled it back in with a pencil.
00:32:39I worked until one in the morning.
00:32:41The next morning, Ashley sat in my old seat, chatting happily with Mom.
00:32:45No one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark, or what had happened last night.
00:32:50And I no longer needed to wait for that one last time.
00:32:53From that day on, I began preparing to leave.
00:32:56Until the day I received my acceptance letter, I knew the time had come to leave this house.
00:33:00I packed my suitcase and bought a Greyhouse ticket for the early dawn departure the next day.
00:33:05The destination was Pittsburgh.
00:33:07Then I walked to the door and placed my house key on the small entryway table.
00:33:10I left the group chat and deactivated my old phone number.
00:33:14The screen went dark.
00:33:16The whole world suddenly became much quieter.
00:33:20I pulled my suitcase, opened the door, and closed it softly behind me.
00:33:32These are yours?
00:33:33Your handwriting is so new.
00:33:35Yeah.
00:33:36Please put them back.
00:33:37I was just looking.
00:33:38You're way too protective of this stuff.
00:33:40She casually put the notebook back on the desk.
00:33:42I glanced over and suddenly realized what was missing.
00:33:45There was a blue one on the desk.
00:33:46Where is it?
00:33:47I don't touch it.
00:33:48I didn't see it.
00:33:49I searched for ten minutes and finally found it in the trash can.
00:33:52Half the cover had been torn off, and several pages inside were soaked with coffee.
00:33:56The writing blurred into smears.
00:33:58It was the problem-solving notebook I had been organizing since freshman year.
00:34:01Three years.
00:34:02I only had that one copy.
00:34:04Ashley, this?
00:34:05Oh, maybe I knocked it over when I was carrying coffee.
00:34:07Just write another one.
00:34:08I stood in the doorway holding the drenched notebook, my hands shaking.
00:34:15I took the notebook back to Chloe's room and dried it page by page with a hair broyer.
00:34:21Where the writing was blurred, I slowly filled it back in with a pencil.
00:34:28I worked until one in the morning.
00:34:30The next morning, Ashley sat in my old seat, chatting happily with mom.
00:34:34No one has bought the circles on what I was researched on, or what you have in the house.
00:34:38And I did not forget to wait for all of the rest of the room.
00:34:42From that day on, I began preparing to be.
00:34:45Until the day I received my acceptance data, I knew the time I had to leave this house.
00:34:49I packed my suitcase and bought a great house today for my early-time departure the next day.
00:34:53My destination was in space.
00:34:55When I walked to the door, I placed my house in a small entryway table.
00:34:59I left the couch at the day after the day I was working on the room.
00:35:02And we crossed my life down.
00:35:05The whole world is a large part of the room.
00:35:08I bought my suitcase.
00:35:10I opened the door.
00:35:12And the horse did stop for the landing desk.
00:35:16And I went to Ashley's down the stairs.
00:35:20Give her your room and share with Chloe for now.
00:35:23Saturday morning, your mom sent it casually around changing shoes by the door.
00:35:27I was sitting at the dining table getting a cereal.
00:35:30My spoon stopped in midair.
00:35:35Why my room?
00:35:36Your room gets less natural light.
00:35:38Ashley hasn't been feeling well lately.
00:35:40The doctor said more sunlight would be good for her.
00:35:42Ethan's room has a window too.
00:35:44Your brother is a boy, Ashley is a girl.
00:35:46How could they share a room?
00:35:47Then let her stay with Chloe.
00:35:48Chloe needs space to stretch at night.
00:35:50Your room only has a bed and a desk.
00:35:52It's easy to clear out.
00:35:53How long is she staying?
00:35:54About half a month.
00:35:55Her summer program is over here.
00:35:56I didn't argue anymore.
00:35:58Experience had taught me a long time ago that arguing was useless.
00:36:01This family celebrates everyone's birthday.
00:36:05Everyone's but mine.
00:36:06Because my parents only love my twin siblings, Ethan and Chloe.
00:36:10They don't love me.
00:36:11When Ethan wants a birthday party, my parents book a private room at his favorite steakhouse a month in advance.
00:36:18When it's Chloe's turn and she wants to go to Six Flags, the whole family goes.
00:36:22Mom even posts nine photos on Instagram.
00:36:25But on my birthday, this house always treats it like any other day.
00:36:29I thought turning 18 would be different.
00:36:32That morning, I got up early on purpose, put on light makeup, and sat on the living room couch to
00:36:38wait.
00:36:38Mom walked past me on her way out, carrying Chloe's dance back.
00:36:43Get up your own lunch.
00:36:44I'm taking Chloe from the intensive class.
00:36:47Dad was watering tomatoes in the backyard.
00:36:50Ethan called him to go play basketball at the park, and the two of them left soon after.
00:36:56At noon, I was the only one left in the house.
00:36:59I sent a message in the family chat.
00:37:01I'm 18 today.
00:37:03No one replied.
00:37:05At seven that night, everybody came home.
00:37:07No one sang.
00:37:09No one felt like anything was missing.
00:37:11I was 18 now.
00:37:13At last, I could decide for myself where I wanted to go.
00:37:17Mallory, delete that message from the room chat.
00:37:20I almost missed Grandpa's voice message.
00:37:23Ethan didn't even look up.
00:37:25He tapped the edge of his plate, lightly with his dinner knife,
00:37:29signaling Mom to give you more ribs.
00:37:33I looked down at my phone.
00:37:35The message in the family chat.
00:37:37I'm 18 today, but still sitting there.
00:37:39No one had replied.
00:37:42Mom came over with a plate of garlic bread, and set it in the middle of the table.
00:37:52I looked at the food on the table.
00:37:54Ethan liked ribs.
00:37:56Chloe liked mac and cheese.
00:37:58Mom had made the salad for herself.
00:38:00Not a single dish was for me.
00:38:02I liked seafood.
00:38:04I liked seafood.
00:38:05Grilled salmon was my favorite.
00:38:06I had said it so many times.
00:38:09No one in this family remembered.
00:38:12Dad, today...
00:38:14Dad set down his iced tea and glanced at me.
00:38:18The next second, he turned back to Ethan.
00:38:21How's your wrist from basketball this afternoon?
00:38:23Does the sprain still hurt?
00:38:25It's okay.
00:38:26Shoot.
00:38:27It aches a little when I shoot.
00:38:28I'll take you to a sports therapist tomorrow.
00:38:30My words died in midair.
00:38:33I finished dinner quietly, and went to wash the dishes.
00:38:36I turned the faucet on high.
00:38:40I'm living with a kid in the sun, and Chloe practiced a lot of the basics.
00:38:44I'm totally staying with the kids.
00:38:45We went on fire.
00:38:46Mom had techniques besides her.
00:38:48Ethan was playing Xbox as well.
00:38:51I was shouting at him.
00:38:52Dad was on the couch with his own house.
00:38:54Everyone in this house had something to throw.
00:38:57Everyone had something to throw.
00:38:59I'm sorry, but he said me.
00:39:03I stood in the kitchen, washing the table and cups for five minutes.
00:39:08The warmth was dying.
00:39:10Loud enough that he was like five, no one had here.
00:39:13After the dishes, I went back to my room and shut the door.
00:39:16My phone lit up.
00:39:17It was a message in the past for each other.
00:39:19It was the only happy birthday I had received all day from a classmate I had known for less than
00:39:24a year.
00:39:24I replied, thank you.
00:39:26Then I opened my photo album and kept scrolling back.
00:39:28After I turned six, Mom's camera had almost completely turned toward them.
00:39:32Most of the photos were of them.
00:39:34I scrolled for a long time before I finally found them.
00:39:37It was from when I was nine and had entered the school speech contest.
00:39:41Mom had taken it from the audience.
00:39:43The photo was blurry.
00:39:44Only half my body was in it because the other half of the frame was Chloe in the front row,
00:39:50turning back toward the camera with a bright smile.
00:39:52I stood off stage in front of the microphone, my face barely visible.
00:39:58The phone screen dimmed and my face appeared in the black reflection.
00:40:03Eighteen-year-old Mallory Hayes had spent the whole morning putting on makeup, waited all day, and still hadn't gotten
00:40:09a single happy birthday.
00:40:11Mom's voice came from outside the door.
00:40:15Mallory, wake your sister at seven tomorrow morning.
00:40:19She has training at 8.30.
00:40:22Okay.
00:40:25Hey, sis. It's seven.
00:40:27Chloe had woken up on her own.
00:40:29She stood in my doorway in a pink leotard, her hair half-tied.
00:40:33I checked my phone.
00:40:35Six-fifty-three.
00:40:36My alarm hadn't even gone off.
00:40:38You got up by yourself?
00:40:40Yeah.
00:40:41I set an alarm.
00:40:43Mom told you to wake me, but I was afraid you didn't sleep well last night.
00:40:47She said it so casually, but the words still stung.
00:40:50She knew I hadn't slept well last night.
00:40:53I'll help you tie your hair.
00:40:55No, it's fine.
00:40:57I can do it.
00:41:00She turned and left.
00:41:03Chloe had always been like that with me.
00:41:05She wasn't cool.
00:41:07She just wasn't close.
00:41:10She called me sis, but the word carried no weight.
00:41:14The twins had their own rhythm, and I had never been able to enter.
00:41:18At breakfast, Mom was warming milk for Chloe.
00:41:21Ethan wasn't up yet.
00:41:24Mallory, have you eaten?
00:41:25I have.
00:41:27I hadn't.
00:41:28She didn't even check whether there was a bowl I used on the table.
00:41:31She just nodded.
00:41:33Chloe, did you pack your water bottle?
00:41:35It's hot today.
00:41:36Drink my water.
00:41:37I did.
00:41:38Hey.
00:41:39Mal, drive your sister there.
00:41:41She still doesn't have stops in the treatise.
00:41:44Chloe had been going to that treatise center for two years.
00:41:47Mom still said she didn't know you were at her.
00:41:50Okay.
00:41:52As we were leaving, Ethan finally got up and called from his doorway.
00:41:56Mom, what's for breakfast?
00:41:59I left you a bagel and yogurt on the table.
00:42:02A bagel and yogurt.
00:42:04Ethan's regular breakfast.
00:42:06No one had ever asked what I wanted in the morning.
00:42:09On the way to the training center,
00:42:11Chloe sat in the passenger seat scrolling through her phone.
00:42:15She wasn't trying to be cold.
00:42:17It just never occurred to her to talk to me.
00:42:22Sis?
00:42:24When she suddenly spoke, my palm tightened on the wheel.
00:42:28What?
00:42:29That message you sent in the group chat yesterday?
00:42:33Ethan told you to delete it?
00:42:35Yeah.
00:42:37Did you?
00:42:39Yeah.
00:42:41She nodded and lowered her head to the telephone.
00:42:44I waited for a long time to agree with her to say happy birthday.
00:42:48She didn't.
00:42:50When we reached the training center, she unbuttoned her seat.
00:42:53Sis, I'm here.
00:42:56Yeah.
00:42:57Train hard.
00:42:58Can you help me out this afternoon if I can shut up?
00:43:00I have a study group this afternoon.
00:43:02That was a lie.
00:43:03I had nothing this afternoon.
00:43:05I just didn't want to go.
00:43:06Then I'll ask Mom to give me up.
00:43:10At 4.50 that afternoon, Mom sent a message in the family group chat.
00:43:15Chloe finishes training at 5.
00:43:16Who can pick her up?
00:43:18I'm in a meeting.
00:43:19We had a friend's house.
00:43:20Mallory, aren't you free this afternoon?
00:43:22I looked at that message.
00:43:24She started with, who can pick her up?
00:43:26But in the end, it still landed on me.
00:43:28It's on your way anyway, right?
00:43:29Just go pick her up.
00:43:30It wasn't on my way at all.
00:43:31But in this family, my road was always on the way.
00:43:34My time was always free.
00:43:35I typed OK and sent it.
00:43:38Then I turned my phone face down on the desk.
00:43:42Suddenly, I wondered, what would happen if one day I didn't reply with OK?
00:43:49If I turned off my phone, canceled my number, and disappeared too,
00:43:53would they first panic because no one could pick up Chloe?
00:43:57Or would they think of me first?
00:43:59I knew the answer.
00:44:00When I picked Chloe up, her face was flushed from training and her hair was damp.
00:44:04Sis, I'm thirsty.
00:44:06Where's your water bottle?
00:44:08Finished it.
00:44:09I handed her the spare bottle of water in the car.
00:44:11Thanks, sis.
00:44:13On the way home, she soon fell asleep against the window.
00:44:16I adjusted the air conditioning so the car wouldn't be so cold.
00:44:19She was the little princess everyone in the family revolved around.
00:44:22And most of the roads I had driven through this city had been for someone else,
00:44:25but not for much longer.
00:44:27Not long after, the school college counselor called me into her office.
00:44:31Mallory Hayes, I saw your awards record.
00:44:34Honorable Ments in the National Math Olympics.
00:44:36That's impressive.
00:44:37Awards like that carry me a weight.
00:44:39Which schools are you considering for early applications?
00:44:42I'm still looking.
00:44:43What are your parents like?
00:44:44I haven't told them yet.
00:44:46Something this important, and you're not discussing it with your family first?
00:44:50I want to look into it myself first.
00:44:52I knew that even if I told them, no one would take it seriously.
00:44:55On last month's mock examine, I ranked third in the entire grade.
00:44:57I took a photo of my report card and sent it to the family group chat.
00:45:00My third place ranking stayed in the chat for only a very short while.
00:45:03All it got from mom was one sentence.
00:45:04Not bad.
00:45:05The next message was a video mom sent of Chloe dancing.
00:45:08That afternoon, when I got home,
00:45:09I found a dusty letter among a pile of bills and flyers on the coffee table.
00:45:13It said,
00:45:14Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Hayes.
00:45:16Your daughter, Mallory Hayes, has received an honorable mention
00:45:19in the National High School Mathematics Academy.
00:45:21Two months had passed.
00:45:23The envelope hadn't even been opened.
00:45:24It was tucked between bills and pizza curans.
00:45:26Completely forgotten.
00:45:28At dinner, mom answered a FaceTime call from my aunt.
00:45:31My aunt asked about Ethan Swimley.
00:45:32Mom said he had taken second place in the district.
00:45:35Pride filling her voice.
00:45:36My aunt asked about Chloe's dance competition.
00:45:39Mom said she had won gold at regionals.
00:45:41And the judges had praised how steady she was off dance.
00:45:43Have an hour.
00:45:44She was like a lot.
00:45:46You know?
00:45:48She was doing it.
00:45:50Third in my grade.
00:45:51A National Math Olympiac Award.
00:45:53In mom's mouth, all of it became doing fine.
00:45:55I sat at the dining table, still holding the award letter
00:45:58that had been forgotten for two months.
00:46:00No one asked how I had been lately.
00:46:01No one turned to me and said,
00:46:03Mallory, what about you?
00:46:04I went back to my room, opened my laptop,
00:46:06and started looking up colleges that would actually care
00:46:08about competition backgrounds.
00:46:09In the end, I stopped at Carnegie Mellon.
00:46:11Hundreds of miles away from home,
00:46:13no one would remember me,
00:46:14only when they needed someone to pick up my sister.
00:46:16I opened the application page.
00:46:18My fingers hovered over the screen for three seconds
00:46:21before I finally closed it.
00:46:23I decided to try one more time.
00:46:25If they still couldn't see me this time,
00:46:27I would leave.
00:46:29Completely.
00:46:33Mallory, Ashley has come to stay in school.
00:46:35I'm going to take the camera.
00:46:37Give her a little bit of a shower.
00:46:40Saturday morning,
00:46:41I'm going to casually wash my shoes by the door.
00:46:44I was breathing in a dining table.
00:46:46I seen a stop in the floor.
00:46:51My mind,
00:46:53my name is Leslie Trude.
00:46:55Ashley,
00:46:56I'm going to take the camera.
00:46:57I'm Dr. Sylvain.
00:46:58She said,
00:47:10I didn't argue with her.
00:47:15Experience taught me a long time ago to argue for success.
00:47:18That afternoon, Ashley came in dragging two large suitcases smiling and sweetly.
00:47:25Aunt Samuel, uncle, you're here!
00:47:27Mom was so bored as if an important guest had arrived.
00:47:33Ashley pushed her suitcases into my room and looked around from the doorway.
00:47:38Auntie, can this bookshelf be moved out?
00:47:40I want to put a vanity mirror here.
00:47:43Of course.
00:47:45Mallory, move the bookshelf out.
00:47:47On my bookshelf were three years of notebooks, reference books, and a few certificates.
00:47:52It took me an hour to move everything into a corner of Chloe's room.
00:47:55That night, I laid a mattress on the floor of Chloe's room.
00:48:00Sis, why don't you sleep on the bed?
00:48:02I'll sleep on the floor.
00:48:04No, the floor is fine.
00:48:07Ashley is actually okay.
00:48:09Don't be upset.
00:48:11Ashley was never what upset me.
00:48:14What hurt was that in this house, I was always the one expected to give way.
00:48:20On the third day, I went back to my room to get review materials
00:48:23and opened the door to find Ashley flipping through my math competition notes.
00:48:27These are yours?
00:48:28Your handwriting is so good.
00:48:30Yeah.
00:48:31Please put them back.
00:48:32I was just looking.
00:48:33You're way too protective of this stuff.
00:48:35She casually put the notebook back on the desk.
00:48:37I glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing.
00:48:40There was a blue one on the desk.
00:48:42Where is it?
00:48:42I didn't touch it.
00:48:43I didn't see it.
00:48:44I searched for ten minutes and finally found it in the trash can.
00:48:48Half the cover had been torn off and several pages inside were soaked with coffee.
00:48:52The writing blurred into smears.
00:48:53It was the problem solving notebook I had been organizing since freshman year.
00:48:57Three years.
00:48:57I only had that one copy.
00:48:59Ashley, this?
00:49:01Oh, maybe I knocked it over when I was carrying coffee.
00:49:03Just write another one.
00:49:04I stood in the doorway holding the drenched notebook, my hands shaking.
00:49:10I took the notebook back to Chloe's room and dried it page by page with a hair broyer.
00:49:17Where the writing was blurred, I slowly filled it back in with a pencil.
00:49:23I worked until one in the morning.
00:49:25The next morning, Ashley sat in my old seat, chatting happily with Mom.
00:49:29No one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark or what had happened last night.
00:49:33And I no longer needed to wait for that one last time.
00:49:37From that day on, I began preparing to leave.
00:49:40Until the day I received my acceptance letter, I knew the time had come to leave this house.
00:49:44I packed my suitcase and bought a Greyhouse ticket for the early dawn departure the next day.
00:49:49My destination was Pittsburgh.
00:49:50Then I walked to the door and placed my house key on the small entryway table.
00:49:54I left the group chat and deactivated my old phone number.
00:49:58The screen went dark.
00:50:00The whole world suddenly became much quieter.
00:50:04I pulled my suitcase, opened the door, and closed it softly behind me.
00:50:16These are yours?
00:50:17Your handwriting is so neat.
00:50:19Yeah.
00:50:19Please put them back.
00:50:21I was just looking.
00:50:22You're way too protective of this stuff.
00:50:23She casually put the notebook back on the desk.
00:50:26I glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing.
00:50:29There was a blue one on the desk.
00:50:30Where is it?
00:50:31I didn't touch it.
00:50:32I didn't see it.
00:50:33I searched for ten minutes and finally found her a trash can.
00:50:36I didn't have to come out and torn off.
00:50:38And several pages inside were so many copies of the writing over the desk.
00:50:42It was the progress that I had to work out.
00:50:44One for a season's freshman year.
00:50:45The next, the moment had that one copy.
00:50:48Ashley.
00:50:49Please?
00:50:49Or maybe I'm not today when I was in the car.
00:50:51Just write another one.
00:50:52A student of Dwight holding a trash can.
00:50:54My hands shook me.
00:50:59I took the notebook back to her.
00:51:01I tried the page by the age of my daughter.
00:51:05And the writing was a word.
00:51:07I slowly felt a vacuum with a pencil.
00:51:12I worked until one in the morning.
00:51:14The next morning, Ashley sat in my old seat, chatting happily with mom.
00:51:18No one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark, or what had happened last night.
00:51:22And I no longer needed to wait for that one last time.
00:51:26From that day on, I began preparing to leave.
00:51:28Until the day I received my acceptance letter, I knew the time had come to leave this house.
00:51:33I packed my suitcase and bought a Greyhouse ticket when the early dawn departure the next day.
00:51:37The destination was Pittsburgh.
00:51:39Then I walked to the door and placed my house key on the small entryway table.
00:51:43I left the group chat and deactivated my old phone number.
00:51:47The screen went dark.
00:51:48The whole world suddenly became much quieter.
00:51:52I pulled my suitcase, opened the door, and closed it softly behind me.
00:51:59Mallory, Ashley is coming to stay with us for a while.
00:52:04Give her your room and share with Chloe for now.
00:52:07Saturday morning, mom said it casually while changing shoes by the door.
00:52:11I was sitting at the dining table eating cereal.
00:52:13My spoon stopped in mid-air.
00:52:18Why my room?
00:52:19Your room gets the best natural light.
00:52:22Ashley hasn't been feeling well lately, and the doctor said more sunlight would be good for her.
00:52:26Ethan's room has a window, too.
00:52:27Your brother is a boy.
00:52:29Ashley is a girl.
00:52:29How could they share a room?
00:52:31Then let her stay with Chloe.
00:52:32Chloe needs space to stretch it.
00:52:34Your room only has a bed and a desk.
00:52:36It's easy to clear out.
00:52:37How long is she staying?
00:52:38About half a month.
00:52:39Her summer program is over here.
00:52:40I didn't argue anymore.
00:52:42Experience had taught me a long time ago that arguing was useless.
00:52:45This family celebrates everyone's birthday.
00:52:49Everyone's but mine.
00:52:50Because my parents only love my twin siblings, Ethan and Chloe.
00:52:53They don't love me.
00:52:54When Ethan wants a birthday party, my parents work a private room at his favorite steakhouse a month in advance.
00:53:02When it's Chloe's turn and she wants to go to Six Flags, the whole family goes.
00:53:06Mom even posts nine photos on Instagram.
00:53:09But on my birthday, this house always treats it like any other day.
00:53:13I thought turning 18 would be different.
00:53:15That morning, I got up early on purpose, put on light makeup, and sat on the window on the couch
00:53:21to wait.
00:53:22Mom walked past me on her way out, carrying Chloe's dance ball.
00:53:26Get up your own lunch.
00:53:28I'm taking Chloe to intensive class.
00:53:31Dad was watering tomatoes in the backyard.
00:53:34Ethan called me to go play basketball at the park, and the two of them left soon after.
00:53:40At noon, I was the only one left of the house.
00:53:42I sent a message to my grandpa's child.
00:53:45I'm 18 today.
00:53:47No one left.
00:53:48At 7 that night, everybody came home.
00:53:51No one sang.
00:53:52No one felt like anything was missing.
00:53:55I was 18 now.
00:53:57At last, I could decide for myself where I wanted to go.
00:54:01Mallory, delete that message from the group chat.
00:54:04I almost missed grandpa's voice message.
00:54:07Ethan didn't even look up.
00:54:09He tapped the edge of his plate, lightly with his dinner knife, signaling mom to give him more ribs.
00:54:17I looked down at my phone.
00:54:19The message in the family chat, I'm 18 today, was still sitting there.
00:54:23No one had replied.
00:54:26Mom came over with a plate of garlic bread and set it in the middle of the table.
00:54:32Alright.
00:54:33No clothes at all.
00:54:36I looked at the food on the table.
00:54:38I didn't like grapes.
00:54:40Chloe liked mac and cheese.
00:54:42Mom made a salad for herself.
00:54:44I don't have a single dish with my wife.
00:54:46I liked seafood.
00:54:48I ate good sandwiches.
00:54:49I ate good sandwiches.
00:54:50I ate good sandwiches.
00:54:52I ate good sandwiches.
00:55:04I ate good sandwiches.
00:55:08I ate good sandwiches.
00:55:12I ate good sandwiches.
00:55:14My words died in the air.
00:55:17I finished dinner quietly, and went to wash the dishes.
00:55:20I turned the faucet on high.
00:55:24From the living room came the sound of Chloe practicing ballet basses, her toes landing
00:55:29against the floor one by one.
00:55:30Mom counting beats beside her.
00:55:32Ethan was playing Xbox in his room, shouting every few minutes.
00:55:36Dad was on the couch with his iPad.
00:55:38Everyone in this house had something of their own.
00:55:41Everyone had someone answering them.
00:55:44Except me.
00:55:46I stood in the kitchen, washing platelets and cups for five people.
00:55:52The water was loud.
00:55:53Loud enough that even if I cried, no one would hear.
00:55:57After the dishes, I went back to my room and shut the door.
00:56:00My phone lit up.
00:56:01It was a message in the class group chat.
00:56:03It was the only happy birthday I had received all day from a classmate I had known for less
00:56:07than a year.
00:56:08I replied, thank you.
00:56:10Then I opened my photo album and kept scrolling back.
00:56:12After I turned six, mom's camera had almost completely turned toward them.
00:56:16Most of the photos were of them.
00:56:18I scrolled for a long time before I finally found one.
00:56:21It was from when I was nine and had entered the school speech contest.
00:56:25Mom had taken it from the audience.
00:56:27The photo was blurry.
00:56:29Only half my body was in it.
00:56:30Because the other half of the frame was Chloe in the front row, turning back toward the camera
00:56:35with a bright smile.
00:56:36I stood off stage in front of the microphone, my face barely visible.
00:56:42The phone screen dipped, and my face appeared in the black reflection.
00:56:47Eighteen-year-old Mallory Hayes had spent the whole morning putting on makeup, waited all day,
00:56:52and still hadn't gotten a single happy birthday.
00:56:54Mom's voice came from outside the door.
00:56:58Mallory, wake your sister at 17 in the morning.
00:57:02She has training at 8.30.
00:57:06Okay.
00:57:09Hey, sis.
00:57:10It's seven.
00:57:11Chloe had woken up on her own.
00:57:13She stood in my doorway in a pink leotard, her hair half-tied.
00:57:16I checked my phone.
00:57:186.53.
00:57:19My alarm hadn't even gone off.
00:57:22You got up by yourself?
00:57:23Yeah.
00:57:25I set an alarm.
00:57:26Mom told you to wake me, but I was afraid you didn't sleep well last night.
00:57:31She said it so casually, but the words still stung.
00:57:34She knew I hadn't slept well last night.
00:57:37I'll help you tie your hair.
00:57:39No, it's fine.
00:57:41I can do it.
00:57:44She turned and left.
00:57:47Chloe had always been like me.
00:57:49She wasn't cruel.
00:57:51She just wasn't close.
00:57:53She called me sis, but the word carried no weight.
00:57:58The twins had their own rhythm, and I had never been able to enter it.
00:58:02At breakfast, Mom was warming milk for Chloe.
00:58:05Ethan wasn't up yet.
00:58:07Mallie, have you eaten?
00:58:09I have.
00:58:10I hadn't.
00:58:12She didn't even check whether there was a bowl I'd used on the table.
00:58:15She just nodded.
00:58:16Chloe, did you pack your water bottle?
00:58:19It's hot today.
00:58:20Drink more water.
00:58:21I did.
00:58:23Mallie, drive your sister there.
00:58:25She still doesn't know the stops near the training center.
00:58:28Chloe had been going to that training center for two years.
00:58:31Mom still said she didn't know the way.
00:58:35As we knew.
00:58:37Mom, what's your record?
00:58:43I left you.
00:58:44I left you a baby with a baby, too.
00:58:46I left you.
00:58:46I'm a baby with a baby.
00:58:47I left you.
00:58:47I was ready to record the suit.
00:58:50No one had ever asked what I wanted.
00:58:53On the way to the training center, Chloe sat in a passenger seat.
00:58:59She wasn't trying to prove it.
00:59:01She just never told her to talk to her.
00:59:07She wasn't trying to prove it.
00:59:12What?
00:59:18Sis?
00:59:19Yeah.
00:59:20Did you?
00:59:23No.
00:59:25She nodded, then lowered her hold to look at her phone again.
00:59:28I waited for a long time, waiting for her to say, happy birthday.
00:59:32She didn't.
00:59:34When we reached the training center, she unbuckled her seatbelt.
00:59:37Sis, I'm here.
00:59:39Yeah.
00:59:40Train hard.
00:59:41Can you pick me up this afternoon?
00:59:43I finish at five.
00:59:44I have a study group this afternoon.
00:59:46That was a lie.
00:59:47I had nothing this afternoon.
00:59:49I just didn't want to go.
00:59:50Then I'll ask Mom to pick me up.
00:59:52Okay.
00:59:54At 4.50 that afternoon, Mom sent a message in the family group chat.
00:59:58Chloe finishes training at five.
01:00:00Who can pick her up?
01:00:01I'm in a meeting.
01:00:02I'm at a friend's house.
01:00:04Mallory, aren't you free this afternoon?
01:00:05I looked at that message.
01:00:08She started with, who can pick her up?
01:00:09But in the end, it still landed on me.
01:00:11It's on your way anyway, right?
01:00:13Just go pick her up.
01:00:14It wasn't on my way at all.
01:00:15But in this family, my road was always on the way.
01:00:18My time was always free.
01:00:20I typed okay and sent it.
01:00:22Then I turned my phone face down on the desk.
01:00:26Suddenly, I wondered.
01:00:29What would happen if one day I didn't reply with okay?
01:00:32If I turned off my phone, canceled my number, and disappeared too?
01:00:37Would they first panic because no one could pick up Chloe?
01:00:41Or would they think of me first?
01:00:42I knew the answer.
01:00:44When I picked Chloe up, her face was flushed from training and her hair was damp.
01:00:48Sis, I'm thirsty.
01:00:50Where's your water bottle?
01:00:51I finished it.
01:00:52I handed her the spare bottle of water in the car.
01:00:55Thanks, sis.
01:00:57On the way home, she soon fell asleep against the window.
01:01:00I adjusted the air conditioning so the car would be so cold.
01:01:03She was the little princess everyone in the family revolved around.
01:01:06And most of the roads I had driven through this city had been for someone else.
01:01:09But not for much longer.
01:01:11Not long after, the school college counselor called me into her office.
01:01:15Mallory Hayes, I signed her awards record.
01:01:18Honorable Men's New National Math Reliefs.
01:01:20That's impressive.
01:01:21Awards like that carry more weight.
01:01:23Which schools are you considering for their applications?
01:01:25I'm still looking.
01:01:27What do your parents think?
01:01:28I haven't told them yet.
01:01:30Something was important and you're not discussing it with your family first?
01:01:34I want to look into it myself first.
01:01:36I knew that even if I told them, no one would take it seriously.
01:01:39On last month's mock exam, I ranked third in the entire grade.
01:01:41I took a photo of my report card and sent it to the family group chat.
01:01:44My third place ranking stayed in the chat for only a very short while.
01:01:46All I got from mom was one sentence, not mom.
01:01:49The next message was a video mom sent of Chloe dancing.
01:01:51That afternoon, when I got home, I found a dusty letter among a pile of bills and flyers on the
01:01:56coffee table.
01:01:57It said,
01:01:58Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Hayes.
01:02:00Your daughter, Mallory Hayes, has received an honorable mention in the National High School Mathematics Olympiad.
01:02:05Two months had passed.
01:02:06The envelope hadn't even been opened.
01:02:08It was tucked between bills and pizza courons.
01:02:10Completely forgotten.
01:02:11At dinner, mom answered a FaceTime call from my aunt.
01:02:14My aunt asked about Ethan's swim meet.
01:02:16Mom said he had taken second place in the district, pride filling her voice.
01:02:20My aunt asked about Chloe's dance competition.
01:02:22Mom said she had won gold at regionals, and the judges had praised how steady she was off dives.
01:02:27How's Mallory?
01:02:28She's applying to college soon, too, right?
01:02:32She's... doing fine.
01:02:33Third in my grade.
01:02:35The National High School Committee.
01:02:36The mobs are out all day long.
01:02:38They're doing fine.
01:02:39The whole side of the dining table.
01:02:40Still holding the board like me, even if I got her for two months.
01:02:43No one else telling me they came to me.
01:02:45No one turned to me and said,
01:02:47How are you going to work?
01:02:47I went back to my room and opened my laptop and started looking at the colleges I could actually care
01:02:52about competition.
01:02:52In the end, I stopped at Carnegie Mellon.
01:02:55Hundreds of miles away from home, but no one could love me.
01:02:58The whole number will dance at the time of my sister.
01:03:00I only have a patient age.
01:03:02My fingers hovered over the screen for three seconds before I finally closed it.
01:03:07I decided to try one more time.
01:03:09If they still couldn't see me this time, I would leave.
01:03:13Completely.
01:03:15Okay.
01:03:17Mallory, Ashley's complete statements will come.
01:03:21Give her your...
01:03:22The chair carries now.
01:03:23Saturday morning.
01:03:25Mom sent it casually, changing shoes by the door.
01:03:28I was sitting at the dining table eating cereal.
01:03:30My spoon stopped in mid-air.
01:03:35Why my room?
01:03:37Your room gets the best natural light.
01:03:39Ashley isn't feeling well lately.
01:03:40The doctor said more sunlight would be good for her.
01:03:43Ethan's room has a window too.
01:03:44Your brother is a boy.
01:03:45Ashley is a girl.
01:03:46How could they share a room?
01:03:47Then let her stay with Chloe.
01:03:49Chloe needs space to stretch at night.
01:03:51Your room only has a bed and a desk.
01:03:53It's easy to clear out.
01:03:54How long is she staying?
01:03:55About half a month.
01:03:56Her summer program is over here.
01:03:57Okay.
01:03:57I didn't argue anymore.
01:03:59Experience had taught me a long time ago that arguing was useless.
01:04:02That afternoon, Ashley came in dragging two large suitcases, smiling sweetly.
01:04:07I didn't know.
01:04:09Auntie, Uncle.
01:04:11You're here.
01:04:11You're here.
01:04:12Come in.
01:04:13Mom was so warm as if an important guest had arrived.
01:04:17Ashley pushed her suitcases into my room and looked around from the doorway.
01:04:22Auntie, can this bookshelf be moved out?
01:04:24I want to put a vanity mirror here.
01:04:27Of course.
01:04:28Mallory, move the bookshelf out.
01:04:30On my bookshelf were three years of notebooks, reference books, and a few certificates.
01:04:36It took me an hour to move everything into the corner of Chloe's room.
01:04:39That night, I laid a mattress on the floor of Chloe's room.
01:04:44Sis, why don't you sleep on the bed?
01:04:46I'll sleep on the floor.
01:04:48No, the floor is fine.
01:04:51Ashley is actually okay.
01:04:53Don't be upset.
01:04:55Ashley was never what upset me.
01:04:58What hurt was that in this house, I was always the one expected to give way.
01:05:04On the third day, I went back to my room to get review materials and opened the door to find
01:05:08Ashley flipping through my math competition notes.
01:05:11These are yours?
01:05:12Your handwriting is so neat.
01:05:14Yeah.
01:05:15Please put them back.
01:05:16I was just looking.
01:05:17You're way too protective of this stuff.
01:05:18She casually put the notebook back on the desk.
01:05:21I glanced over and suddenly realized one was missing.
01:05:24There was a blue one on the desk.
01:05:25Where is it?
01:05:26I didn't touch it.
01:05:27I didn't see it.
01:05:28I searched for ten minutes and finally found a new trash can.
01:05:31Half the cover had been torn off.
01:05:33And several pages inside were soaked in coffee.
01:05:35The writing blurred into smears.
01:05:37It was the problem-solving notebook I had been organizing since freshman year.
01:05:40Three years.
01:05:41I only had that one cup.
01:05:43Ashley.
01:05:44This.
01:05:44Oh, maybe I knocked it over when I was carrying coffee.
01:05:46I was writing on the wall.
01:05:47I stood in the doorlight under the attached notebook.
01:05:50My hands shaking.
01:05:54I took the notebook back to Chloe's room and dried it page by page with a hair broyer.
01:06:00Where the writing was blurred, I slowly filled it back in with a pencil.
01:06:07I worked until one in the morning.
01:06:09The next morning, Ashley sat in my old seat, chatting happily with mom.
01:06:13No one asked why the circles under my eyes were so dark or what had happened last night.
01:06:17And I no longer needed to wait for that one last time.
01:06:21From that day on, I began preparing to leave.
01:06:24Until the day I received my acceptance letter, I knew the time had come to leave this house.
01:06:28I packed my suitcase and bought a Greyhouse ticket for the early dawn departure the next day.
01:06:32The destination was Pittsburgh.
01:06:34Then I walked to the door.
01:06:35I was laying on the street.
01:06:38I left with a child.
01:06:39He acted.
01:06:40I walked to the door.
01:06:42I walked to the door.
01:06:44I walked to the door.
01:06:47I walked to the door.
01:06:48I walked to the door.
01:06:49I walked to the door.
01:06:51I walked to the door.
01:06:54I walked to the door.
01:06:55I walked to the door.
01:06:56I walked to the door.
01:06:57I walked to the door.
01:06:57I walked to the door.
01:06:58I walked to the door.
01:06:58I walked to the door.
01:06:58You
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