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Theo is cast out by his family and sent to a church to be “fixed.” There, he meets Alexander, a young priest who challenges him at every turn. But beneath their constant tension lies an undeniable attraction, and soon they must face the consequences of a love neither of them was supposed to feel.
https://reelslink.com/marketing/vjlhwI
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https://www.reelshort.com/movie/altarboy-6a7619d41dcbbd8e12015bfe
🍁Notice: All videos by ShortMix are officially authorized.
Theo is cast out by his family and sent to a church to be “fixed.” There, he meets Alexander, a young priest who challenges him at every turn. But beneath their constant tension lies an undeniable attraction, and soon they must face the consequences of a love neither of them was supposed to feel.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:10Get out.
00:00:13What?
00:00:14Get out!
00:00:16Dad, we're like five miles from home.
00:00:19It's raining.
00:00:20The church is your home now.
00:00:22So you get rid of your affliction.
00:00:27You're seriously kicking me out because I'm gay?
00:00:32Dad, what about school?
00:00:34The church has a school program, which you will attend.
00:00:38And if you want to come home, you better hope they cure you.
00:00:41Now out.
00:00:42The new priest is expecting you.
00:00:55I told my dad I was gay, and in less than 24 hours, he dumped me at this church for
00:00:59what?
00:01:00Conversion camp?
00:01:05Fuck this.
00:01:06I'm 18.
00:01:07I'm going to find my own way out of this town.
00:01:17Ah!
00:01:17Hey!
00:01:18Hey!
00:01:19Lots of stupid trying to get out of this town as fast as possible.
00:01:25This alley is a ferry-free zone.
00:01:29You're kind of welcome here.
00:01:31It's great because I don't want to be here either.
00:01:34Nah!
00:01:34You can't leave that easy.
00:01:36We've got a reputation on the floor.
00:01:38Switchblade.
00:01:42Hey!
00:01:43Please, please.
00:01:44I'm going to enjoy making you bleed, homo.
00:01:47Stop!
00:01:47Please!
00:01:53Step away from him!
00:01:56Did my priest just save me?
00:01:59Father Alexander!
00:02:01We weren't-
00:02:02You have ten seconds to leave.
00:02:04Ten.
00:02:06Nine.
00:02:07Eight.
00:02:19You're Theomart, yes?
00:02:21Yes.
00:02:23And you're-
00:02:24The new head priest at Sacred Heart.
00:02:26Which means you're my responsibility.
00:02:28Let's go.
00:02:30No.
00:02:31I'm not going anywhere near that fucking church.
00:02:35We're not having this discussion in the rain.
00:02:37So either you come with me now, willingly, or I make you.
00:02:41Your choice.
00:02:55What?
00:02:56Uh, uh, priests are, like, normally old and gray.
00:03:03And?
00:03:03They don't usually look like you.
00:03:09And what do I look like?
00:03:12I don't know.
00:03:13I don't know.
00:03:16Of course you do, or you wouldn't have said anything.
00:03:19Say it.
00:03:21Well, like, like, you're young.
00:03:23You're, like, you know, you're 21 or 22, and that's, like, that's too young to be a priest.
00:03:29You're hot.
00:03:30I mean, like, someone that hot, they don't be a priest.
00:03:32They're, like, a model or an actor.
00:03:37Being ugly is not a prerequisite to be a priest.
00:03:41Control yourself, Theo.
00:03:43You cannot be eye-fucking your new priest.
00:03:46God, he's the hottest man I've ever seen.
00:03:49What'd you just say?
00:03:53Uh, I said you're the wettest man I've ever seen.
00:03:56Right.
00:03:59Well, then dry me off.
00:04:04You want me to dry you off?
00:04:07Don't make me repeat myself.
00:04:26Is he telling me to stop because he doesn't want the gay guy touching him?
00:04:30Or because he's feeling the tension between us?
00:04:33I'll take it from here.
00:04:36He just doesn't want a gay guy touching him.
00:04:38Got it.
00:04:43Look, I don't want you here.
00:04:46Well, that's good.
00:04:47Because I don't want to be here either, so we're on the same page.
00:04:50But your father sits on the parish council.
00:04:54And my future here depends on his recommendation.
00:04:57So what's your big plan?
00:04:58You're going to make me pray the gay away?
00:05:00Do you think that'll work?
00:05:02You've got to be fucking kidding me.
00:05:04I am not doing this, all right?
00:05:06This whole town, it's bigoted and oppressive,
00:05:08and it all stems from this fucking church.
00:05:10You don't know me, all right?
00:05:13And you don't know how I run this church.
00:05:14Yeah, and I don't want to.
00:05:16I just want out of all of this.
00:05:17Yeah, well, it doesn't matter what you want.
00:05:20And your father has made it sufficiently clear what you are to me.
00:05:22And what is that, father?
00:05:27My personal altar boy.
00:05:34Aren't altar boys children?
00:05:36Last time I checked, being 18 makes you an adult.
00:05:43Even though you don't act like one.
00:05:45Oh, so making me your altar boy is a personal fetish of yours then.
00:05:49Got it.
00:05:51You know what?
00:05:52Nothing is going to happen like that between us.
00:05:54I'm not like that.
00:05:55Being married to God is the straightest thing in the world.
00:06:00My faith may be a joke to you,
00:06:02but it's my life.
00:06:10And this,
00:06:12this is the house of God.
00:06:13My house.
00:06:15And while you're here, you will respect that.
00:06:19Now, get changed
00:06:21and meet me in the chapel.
00:06:23Okay?
00:06:24There are people out there waiting for me to help them.
00:06:27While I've been saving you.
00:06:35He may be hot, but he's a fucking grade-A asshole.
00:06:41So I have to pretend to give this a shot.
00:06:56I've asked God to take away my sinful thoughts,
00:07:00but they still plague me, father.
00:07:03How may I help you with this, sister?
00:07:06I need you to help me act on them.
00:07:13Maybe if I act on them,
00:07:16the urge will disappear.
00:07:17I won't feel so hot every time I look at you.
00:07:22I'm sorry, sister,
00:07:23but I'm afraid giving in to your sins only fuels them.
00:07:27Instead, just do five Hail Marys
00:07:30and let God console you.
00:07:32Damn.
00:07:33I got a big reaction from the priest
00:07:35patting him down with a towel.
00:07:37There's no way that Father Alexander is gay.
00:07:50Theo,
00:07:52eavesdropping,
00:07:52especially upon the desires of others,
00:07:54is a sin.
00:07:56Well, I am pretty sure that a nun
00:07:58trying to fuck her priest is worse.
00:08:00Oh, by the way,
00:08:02just a little tip for you.
00:08:03All those women,
00:08:05they don't want your help.
00:08:07They just want your dick.
00:08:10You will respect the church
00:08:11while you are here.
00:08:12I'm just being honest.
00:08:14Lying's a sin, is it not?
00:08:15You're right.
00:08:16Your turn.
00:08:18For what?
00:08:19To confess your sins, altar boy.
00:08:21Hey, hey, hey!
00:08:25I am so sorry to do this to all of you,
00:08:27but it appears our confessional hours
00:08:29have shifted to Sunday.
00:08:31So, please come back
00:08:33and I'll give each of you ample time.
00:08:41May God,
00:08:42who has enlightened every heart,
00:08:43help you to know thy sins
00:08:44and trust in his mercy.
00:08:47Father, please forgive me,
00:08:49for I have sinned.
00:08:51It's been three days
00:08:53since I last touched myself.
00:08:55I've been a bad, bad boy.
00:08:58You know, Theo,
00:08:59if you took this seriously,
00:09:01you might actually find it useful.
00:09:02Why should I take any of this seriously?
00:09:05Your father sent you here
00:09:06to bolster your faith.
00:09:07No, my dad sent me here
00:09:09because I'm gay.
00:09:10If you expect me to say
00:09:11that being gay is a sin,
00:09:12you can forget it.
00:09:13Theo, I'm not moralizing
00:09:14your sexuality.
00:09:15All right?
00:09:18I'm not that kind of priest.
00:09:24What kind of priest are you?
00:09:28One who wants to understand?
00:09:32Tell me, Theo,
00:09:34what thoughts
00:09:35led you to believe
00:09:36you wanted to lie with other men?
00:09:38You talk about this
00:09:39like it's just a sex thing.
00:09:41Is it not?
00:09:43No, I've never even been
00:09:45with another man,
00:09:46but I still know that I'm gay.
00:09:51How?
00:09:52It's like
00:09:53it's the attraction
00:09:55to other men
00:09:55like when I first saw you.
00:10:02Go on.
00:10:06You can't be serious.
00:10:11I am.
00:10:13I want to understand.
00:10:15Why would he want to understand
00:10:16what it's like
00:10:17to realize you're gay?
00:10:20Unless he might be gay?
00:10:22Theo, I get that
00:10:26it's hard to talk about.
00:10:28But if I'm going to help you,
00:10:30I need to hear it
00:10:32from your own.
00:10:32That's why you want to help.
00:10:34Of course.
00:10:36Why else would I want to know?
00:10:38So this is part of him
00:10:39trying to cure me.
00:10:41Fine.
00:10:41If he thinks being gay
00:10:42makes me some depraved freak,
00:10:44then that's what I'll show him.
00:10:48When I first see a man,
00:10:50the first thing I notice
00:10:51is his eyes.
00:10:53If he smells good,
00:10:57I would feel
00:10:58to have his arms
00:11:00wrapped around me.
00:11:04That's just the initial attraction.
00:11:07The next layer
00:11:08is more intense.
00:11:11It's more
00:11:14feral.
00:11:28I think about ripping off
00:11:31your priest's collar.
00:11:33About you kissing me,
00:11:36touching me,
00:11:37touching me,
00:11:38your tongue,
00:11:41on my jaw,
00:11:42on my neck.
00:11:45I think about you
00:11:46taking me into the chapel,
00:11:48bending me over the altar
00:11:50and telling me to worship you.
00:11:55Do you want me to worship you?
00:12:02Father Alexander?
00:12:06You still there?
00:12:11Looks like I won
00:12:12this little game.
00:12:14Wait, wait!
00:12:15Get your hands off me!
00:12:17Do you think it's funny
00:12:18to make a mockery of our faith?
00:12:19I am not making a mockery
00:12:21of your faith,
00:12:21I'm making a mockery of you!
00:12:25Fine.
00:12:26Mock me all you want,
00:12:28but the more you disrespect
00:12:29the house of God,
00:12:30the more I'll add to your punishment.
00:12:32Punishment?
00:12:34Seven Hail Marys.
00:12:36Put out all the candles
00:12:37and polish all the brass.
00:12:39There is like a hundred
00:12:41candlesticks in here
00:12:42that'll take me hours!
00:12:43Exactly.
00:12:44Now you better get started.
00:12:46When you're finished,
00:12:47your bedroom is down the hallway
00:12:48in the rectory.
00:12:49Don't miss anything.
00:12:51I will know.
00:12:55How can a priest
00:12:56be such an arrogant asshole?
00:12:59And hot.
00:13:06Oh, shit.
00:13:07Where did Father Alexander
00:13:08say my room was again?
00:13:12Oh, Father.
00:13:14Please forgive me
00:13:16for the desires
00:13:17I'm harboring in my soul.
00:13:20For the carnal thoughts
00:13:22in my mind.
00:13:28For the feral need.
00:13:31The next layer
00:13:32is more intense.
00:13:34It's more...
00:13:37feral.
00:13:38Could Father Alexander
00:13:40be really praying
00:13:41over how I made him feel?
00:13:43I've never quite felt
00:13:44a pull like this.
00:13:46God.
00:13:47It makes me feel...
00:13:50hot.
00:13:52and Theo.
00:13:58Hearing him on the other side
00:13:59of the confessional.
00:14:02Knowing just exactly
00:14:04what he wanted me to do.
00:14:07I mean, it almost...
00:14:08it almost...
00:14:11makes me think
00:14:13he needs another reminder
00:14:14that eavesdropping
00:14:16is a sin.
00:14:22hear anything interesting?
00:14:24Theo?
00:14:25How did you know
00:14:26I was there?
00:14:27I heard your footsteps
00:14:28approaching before
00:14:29you even got to my door.
00:14:31You threw such a fit
00:14:32when I teased you in there
00:14:33but what,
00:14:33it's okay that you
00:14:34do the exact same thing?
00:14:35Yeah, I was teaching you
00:14:37a lesson.
00:14:38Here.
00:14:42That's bullshit.
00:14:43You were airing
00:14:44your deep, dark,
00:14:45hidden desires
00:14:45and then you were
00:14:46pretending that it's a joke.
00:14:47I'm a priest.
00:14:49We don't have desires.
00:14:51Everybody has desires.
00:14:53You're just repressing yours
00:14:54and pretending
00:14:55that you're better
00:14:55than everyone else.
00:14:56You think you have me
00:14:57figured out,
00:14:58don't you?
00:14:58You are just like
00:15:00every other bigot
00:15:01in this town
00:15:01hiding behind religion
00:15:02to justify their hate.
00:15:04It's not hard, right?
00:15:07Are you sure
00:15:08it's not hard, Theo?
00:15:14Holy shit,
00:15:15does my priest
00:15:16have a boner for me?
00:15:39Get out.
00:15:41What?
00:15:42Get out!
00:15:44Dad, we're like
00:15:46five miles from home.
00:15:47It's raining.
00:15:48The church is your home now
00:15:51until you get rid
00:15:52of your affliction.
00:15:56You're seriously kicking me
00:15:57out because I'm gay?
00:15:59Dad.
00:16:01What about school?
00:16:02The church has a school program
00:16:04which you will attend.
00:16:06And if you want to come home,
00:16:08you better hope
00:16:08they cure you.
00:16:10Now out.
00:16:11The new priest is expecting you.
00:16:23I told my dad
00:16:24I was gay
00:16:25and in less than 24 hours
00:16:26he dumped me
00:16:27at this church
00:16:27for what?
00:16:29conversion camp?
00:16:33Fuck this.
00:16:34I'm 18.
00:16:35I'm going to find my own way
00:16:36out of this town.
00:16:37I have to make my own way
00:16:40but I did it.
00:16:45Hey!
00:16:47I've lost the stoophist
00:16:49trying to get out of the town
00:16:50as fast as possible!
00:16:54This alley is a ferry-free zone.
00:16:57You're kind of welcome here.
00:16:59It's great because I don't want to be here either.
00:17:02Nah, you can't leave that easy.
00:17:05We've got a reputation on hold.
00:17:07Switchblade.
00:17:10Please, please.
00:17:13I'm going to enjoy making you bleed, homo.
00:17:15Stop, please.
00:17:21Step away from him!
00:17:24Did my priest just save me?
00:17:27Father Alexander!
00:17:29We weren't!
00:17:30You have ten seconds to leave.
00:17:33Ten.
00:17:34Nine.
00:17:36Eight.
00:17:47You're Theomart, yes?
00:17:49Yes.
00:17:52You're the new head priest at Sacred Heart, which means you're my responsibility.
00:17:56Let's go.
00:17:58No.
00:18:00I'm not going anywhere near that fucking church.
00:18:03We're not having this discussion in the rain.
00:18:05So either you come with me now, willingly, or I make you.
00:18:09Your choice.
00:18:10Please.
00:18:23What?
00:18:26Priests are, like, normally old and gray.
00:18:31And?
00:18:31They don't usually look like you.
00:18:35You.
00:18:38And what do I look like?
00:18:41I don't know.
00:18:41I don't know.
00:18:42I don't know.
00:18:45Of course you do, or you wouldn't have said anything.
00:18:47Say it.
00:18:49Well, like, like, you're young.
00:18:51You're, like, you know, you're 21 or 22, and that's, like, that's too young to be a priest.
00:18:57You're hot.
00:18:58I mean, like, someone that hot, they don't be a priest.
00:19:01They're, like, a model or an actor.
00:19:06Being ugly is not a prerequisite to be a priest.
00:19:10Control yourself, Theo.
00:19:11You cannot be eye-fucking your new priest.
00:19:14God, he's the hottest man I've ever seen.
00:19:17What'd you just say?
00:19:21Uh, I said you're the wettest man I've ever seen.
00:19:25Right.
00:19:28Well, then dry me off.
00:19:33You want me to dry you off?
00:19:36Don't make me repeat myself.
00:19:53Stop.
00:19:54Is he telling me to stop because he doesn't want the gay guy touching him?
00:19:58Or because he's feeling the tension between us?
00:20:01I'll take it from here.
00:20:04He just doesn't want a gay guy touching him.
00:20:07Got it.
00:20:11Look, I don't want you here.
00:20:14Well, that's good.
00:20:15Because I don't want to be here either, so we're on the same page.
00:20:18But your father sits on the parish council.
00:20:22And my future here depends on his recommendation.
00:20:25So what's your big plan?
00:20:27You're going to make me pray the gay away?
00:20:29Do you think that'll work?
00:20:30You've got to be fucking kidding me.
00:20:32I am not doing this, all right?
00:20:34This whole town, it's bigoted and oppressive and it all stems from this fucking church.
00:20:38You don't know me.
00:20:40All right?
00:20:41And you don't know how I run this church.
00:20:43Yeah, and I don't want to.
00:20:44I just want out of all of this.
00:20:46Yeah, well, it doesn't matter what you want.
00:20:48And your father has made it sufficiently clear what you are to me.
00:20:51And what is that, father?
00:20:55My personal altar boy.
00:21:03Aren't altar boys children?
00:21:05Last time I checked, being 18 makes you an adult.
00:21:11Even though you don't act like one.
00:21:13Oh, so making me your altar boy is a personal fetish of yours then.
00:21:18Got it.
00:21:19You know what?
00:21:20Nothing is going to happen like that between us.
00:21:22I'm not like that.
00:21:24Being married to God is the straightest thing in the world.
00:21:28My faith may be a joke to you, but it's my life.
00:21:34Okay?
00:21:38And this, this is the house of God.
00:21:42My house.
00:21:44And while you're here, you will respect that.
00:21:47Now, get changed and meet me in the chapel.
00:21:51Okay?
00:21:52There are people out there waiting for me to help them.
00:21:55While I've been saving you.
00:22:03He may be hot, but he's a fucking grade-A asshole.
00:22:09So I have to pretend to give this a shot.
00:22:24I've asked God to take away my sinful thoughts, but they still plague me, Father.
00:22:32How may I help you with this, sister?
00:22:34I need you to help me act on them.
00:22:42Maybe if I act on them, the urge will disappear.
00:22:46I won't feel so hot every time I look at you.
00:22:50I'm sorry, sister, but I'm afraid giving in to your sins only fuels them.
00:22:55Instead, just do five Hail Marys and let God console you.
00:23:00Damn, I got a big reaction from the priest patting him down with a towel.
00:23:05There's no way that Father Alexander is gay.
00:23:20Theo, eavesdropping, especially upon the desires of others, is a sin.
00:23:24Well, I am pretty sure that a nun trying to fuck her priest is worse.
00:23:29Oh, by the way, just a little tip for you.
00:23:32All those women, they don't want your help.
00:23:35They just want your dick.
00:23:38You will respect the church while you are here.
00:23:41I'm just being honest.
00:23:42Lying's a sin, is it not?
00:23:44You're right.
00:23:45Your turn.
00:23:46For what?
00:23:47To confess your sins, altar boy.
00:23:49Hey!
00:23:50Hey!
00:23:53I am so sorry to do this to all of you, but it appears our confessional hours have shifted
00:23:58to Sunday.
00:24:00So, please come back and I'll give each of you ample time.
00:24:09May God, who has enlightened every heart, help you to know thy sins and trust in his mercy.
00:24:16Father, please forgive me, for I have sinned.
00:24:20It's been three days since I last touched myself.
00:24:24I've been a bad, bad boy.
00:24:27You know, Theo, if you took this seriously, you might actually find it useful.
00:24:31Why should I take any of this seriously?
00:24:33Your father sent you here to bolster your faith.
00:24:36No, my dad sent me here because I'm gay.
00:24:38If you expect me to say that being gay is a sin, you can forget it.
00:24:41Theo, I'm not moralizing your sexuality, alright?
00:24:46I'm not that kind of priest.
00:24:52What kind of priest are you?
00:24:56One who wants to understand.
00:25:00Tell me, Theo, what thoughts led you to believe you wanted to lie with other men?
00:25:07You talk about this like it's just a sex thing.
00:25:10Is it not?
00:25:11No, I've never even been with another man, but I still know that I'm gay.
00:25:20How?
00:25:21It's like, it's the attraction to other men like when I first saw you.
00:25:30Go on.
00:25:43Why would he want to understand what it's like to realize you're gay?
00:25:49Unless he might be gay?
00:25:51Theo, I get that it's hard to talk about.
00:25:57But if I'm going to help you, I need to hear it from your own.
00:26:00That's why you want to help.
00:26:02Of course.
00:26:04Why else would I want to know?
00:26:06So this is part of him trying to cure me.
00:26:09Fine.
00:26:10If he thinks being gay makes me some depraved freak, then that's what I'll show him.
00:26:17When I first see a man, the first thing I notice is his eyes.
00:26:22If he smells good, I would feel to have his arms wrapped around me.
00:26:33That's just the initial attraction.
00:26:36The next layer is more intense.
00:26:39It's more feral.
00:26:57I think about ripping off your priest collar.
00:27:02About you kissing me.
00:27:04Touching me.
00:27:07Your tongue on my jaw, on my neck.
00:27:13I think about you taking me into the chapel, bending me over the altar, and telling me to worship you.
00:27:24Do you want me to worship you?
00:27:30Father Alexander?
00:27:34You still there?
00:27:40Looks like I won this little game.
00:27:43Wait, wait, get your hands off me!
00:27:45Do you think it's funny to make a mockery of our faith?
00:27:47I am not making a mockery of your faith, I'm making a mockery of you!
00:27:54Fine.
00:27:55Mock me all you want, but the more you disrespect the house of God, the more I'll add to your
00:27:59punishment.
00:28:01Punishment?
00:28:02Seven Hail Marys.
00:28:04Put out all the candles, and polish all the brass.
00:28:08There is like a hundred candlesticks in here that'll take me hours!
00:28:12Exactly.
00:28:13Now you better get started.
00:28:15When you're finished, your bedroom is down the hallway in the rectory.
00:28:18Don't miss anything.
00:28:19I will know.
00:28:23How can a priest be such an arrogant asshole?
00:28:27And hot.
00:28:34Oh shit, where did Father Alexander say my room was again?
00:28:40Oh Father, please forgive me for the desires I'm harboring in my soul.
00:28:48For the carnal thoughts in my mind.
00:28:56For the feral need.
00:29:00The next layer is more intense.
00:29:02It's more...
00:29:05Feral.
00:29:07Could Father Alexander be really praying over how I made him feel?
00:29:11I've never quite felt a pull like this.
00:29:14God.
00:29:15It makes me feel hot.
00:29:21And Theo.
00:29:26Hearing him on the other side of the confessional.
00:29:31Knowing just exactly what he wanted me to do.
00:29:35I mean it almost...
00:29:37It almost...
00:29:40It almost...
00:29:40It almost makes me think he needs another reminder that eavesdropping is a sin.
00:29:50Hear anything interesting, Theo?
00:29:53How did you know I was there?
00:29:56I heard your footsteps approaching before you even got to my door.
00:29:59You threw such a fit when I teased you in there, but what, it's okay that you do the exact
00:30:03same thing?
00:30:03Yeah, I was teaching you a lesson, Theo.
00:30:10No...
00:30:10That's bullshit.
00:30:11You were airing your deep, dark hidden desires and then you were pretending that it's a joke.
00:30:15I'm a priest. We don't have desires.
00:30:19Everybody has desires.
00:30:21You're just repressing yours and pretending that you're better than everyone else.
00:30:25You think you have me figured out, don't you?
00:30:27You are just like every other bigot in this town, hiding behind religion to justify their hate.
00:30:32It's not hard.
00:30:33Right.
00:30:36Are you sure it's not hard, Theo?
00:30:43Holy shit, does my priest have a boner for me?
00:30:45Holy shit, does my priest have a boner for me?
00:31:04Get out.
00:31:06What?
00:31:07Get out!
00:31:09Dad, we're like five miles from home. It's raining.
00:31:14The church is your home now.
00:31:16Until you get rid of your affliction.
00:31:21You're seriously kicking me out because I'm gay?
00:31:26Dad, what about school?
00:31:28The church has a school program, which you will attend.
00:31:31And if you want to come home, you better hope they cure you.
00:31:35Now out. The new priest is expecting you.
00:31:48I told my dad I was gay, and in less than 24 hours, he dumped me at this church for
00:31:53what?
00:31:54Conversion camp?
00:31:59Fuck this. I'm 18. I'm going to find my own way out of this town.
00:32:10He's trying to get out of this town as fast as possible.
00:32:11Hey!
00:32:13You lost or stupid trying to get out of this town as fast as possible?
00:32:19This alley is a ferry-free zone.
00:32:22You're kind of welcome here.
00:32:25It's great because I don't want to be here either.
00:32:27Nah, you can't leave that easy.
00:32:30We've got a reputation on hold.
00:32:32Switchblade.
00:32:36Hey!
00:32:37Please, please.
00:32:38I'm going to enjoy making you bleed, homo.
00:32:40Stop, please.
00:32:47Step away from him!
00:32:50Did my priest just save me?
00:32:53Father Alexander!
00:32:55We weren't...
00:32:56You have ten seconds to leave.
00:32:58Ten.
00:33:00Nine.
00:33:01Eight.
00:33:12You're Theomart, yes?
00:33:15Yes.
00:33:17And you're...
00:33:18The new head priest at Sacred Heart.
00:33:20Which means you're my responsibility.
00:33:22Let's go.
00:33:24No.
00:33:25I'm not going anywhere near that fucking church.
00:33:28We're not having this discussion in the rain.
00:33:31So either you come with me now, willingly, or I make you.
00:33:35Your choice.
00:33:49What?
00:33:51Uh...
00:33:51Priests are like...
00:33:53Normally old and...
00:33:55Gray.
00:33:56And?
00:33:57They don't...
00:33:58Usually look like you.
00:34:01So...
00:34:03And what do I look like?
00:34:06I don't know.
00:34:07I don't know.
00:34:08I don't know.
00:34:10Of course you do, or you wouldn't have said anything.
00:34:12Say it.
00:34:14Well, like...
00:34:15Like...
00:34:16You're young.
00:34:17You're like...
00:34:17You know, you're 21 or 22, and that's...
00:34:19Like, that's too young to be a priest.
00:34:23You're hot.
00:34:23I mean, like...
00:34:24Someone that hot, they don't be a priest.
00:34:26They're like a model or an actor.
00:34:31Being ugly is not a prerequisite to be a priest.
00:34:35Control yourself, Theo.
00:34:37You cannot be eye-fucking your new priest.
00:34:40God, he's the hottest man I've ever seen.
00:34:43What'd you just say?
00:34:46Uh...
00:34:47I said you're the wettest man I've ever seen.
00:34:51Right.
00:34:53Well, then dry me off.
00:34:58You...
00:34:59Want me to dry you off?
00:35:01Don't make me repeat myself.
00:35:18Stop.
00:35:20Is he telling me to stop because he doesn't want the gay guy touching him?
00:35:24Or because he's feeling the tension between us?
00:35:27I'll take it from here.
00:35:29He just doesn't want a gay guy touching him.
00:35:32Got it.
00:35:37Look, I don't want you here.
00:35:40Well, that's good.
00:35:41Because I don't want to be here either, so we're on the same page.
00:35:44But your father sits on the parish council.
00:35:48And my future here depends on his recommendation.
00:35:50So what's your big plan?
00:35:52You're going to make me pray the gay away?
00:35:54Do you think that'll work?
00:35:56You've got to be fucking kidding me.
00:35:58I am not doing this, all right?
00:36:00This whole town, it's bigoted and oppressive, and it all stems from this fucking church.
00:36:04You don't know me.
00:36:06All right?
00:36:06And you don't know how I run this church.
00:36:08Yeah, and I don't want to.
00:36:09I just want out of all of this.
00:36:11Yeah, well, it doesn't matter what you want.
00:36:13And your father has made it sufficiently clear what you are to me.
00:36:16And what is that, father?
00:36:21My personal altar boy.
00:36:28Aren't altar boys children?
00:36:30Last time I checked, being 18 makes you an adult.
00:36:37Even though you don't act like one.
00:36:39Oh, so making me your altar boy is a personal fetish of yours then.
00:36:43Got it.
00:36:45You know what?
00:36:46Nothing is going to happen like that between us.
00:36:48I'm not like that.
00:36:49Being married to God is the straightest thing in the world.
00:36:54My faith may be a joke to you, but it's my life.
00:36:59Okay?
00:37:04And this, this is the house of God.
00:37:07My house.
00:37:09And while you're here, you will respect that.
00:37:12Now, get changed and meet me in the chapel.
00:37:17Okay?
00:37:18There are people out there waiting for me to help them.
00:37:21Well, I've been saving you.
00:37:28He may be hot, but he's a fucking grade-A asshole.
00:37:35So I have to pretend to give this a shot.
00:37:50I've asked God to take away my sinful thoughts, but they still plague me, Father.
00:37:57How may I help you with this, sister?
00:37:59I need you to help me act on them.
00:38:07Maybe if I act on them, the urge will disappear.
00:38:11I won't feel so hot every time I look at you.
00:38:16I'm sorry, sister, but I'm afraid giving in to your sins only fuels them.
00:38:21Instead, just do five Hail Marys and let God console you.
00:38:26Damn.
00:38:27I got a bigger reaction from the priest patting him down with a towel.
00:38:31There's no way that Father Alexander is gay.
00:38:45Theo, eavesdropping, especially upon the desires of others, is a sin.
00:38:49Well, I am pretty sure that a nun trying to fuck her priest is worse.
00:38:54Oh, by the way, just a little tip for you.
00:38:57All those women, they don't want your help.
00:39:01They just want your dick.
00:39:04You will respect the church while you are here.
00:39:06I'm just being honest.
00:39:08Lying's a sin, is it not?
00:39:09You're right.
00:39:10Your turn.
00:39:12For what?
00:39:13To confess your sins, altar boy.
00:39:15Hey!
00:39:16Hey!
00:39:16Hey!
00:39:18I am so sorry to do this to all of you, but it appears our confessional hours have shifted
00:39:24to Sunday.
00:39:25So, please come back and I'll give each of you ample time.
00:39:35May God, who has enlightened every heart, help you to know thy sins and trust in his mercy.
00:39:41Father, please forgive me, for I have sinned.
00:39:45It's been three days since I last touched myself.
00:39:49I've been a bad, bad boy.
00:39:52You know, Theo, if you took this seriously, you might actually find it useful.
00:39:56Why should I take any of this seriously?
00:39:59Your father sent you here to bolster your faith.
00:40:01No, my dad sent me here because I'm gay.
00:40:04If you expect me to say that being gay is a sin, you can forget it.
00:40:07Theo, I'm not moralizing your sexuality.
00:40:09Alright?
00:40:10I...
00:40:12I'm not that kind of priest.
00:40:18What kind of priest are you?
00:40:22One who wants to understand.
00:40:26Tell me, Theo.
00:40:28What thoughts led you to believe you wanted to lie with other men?
00:40:32You talk about this like it's just a sex thing.
00:40:35Is it not?
00:40:36No, I'm...
00:40:38I've never even been with another man, but I still know that I'm gay.
00:40:45How?
00:40:46It's like...
00:40:47It's the attraction to other men like when I first saw you.
00:40:56Go on.
00:41:00You can't be serious.
00:41:02I...
00:41:05I am.
00:41:07I want to understand.
00:41:09Why would he want to understand what it's like to realize you're gay?
00:41:14Unless...
00:41:14He might be gay?
00:41:16Theo, I...
00:41:18I get that it's...
00:41:20It's hard to talk about.
00:41:22But if I'm gonna help you, I need to hear it from your own.
00:41:26That's why you want to help.
00:41:27Of course.
00:41:29I mean, why else would I want to know?
00:41:31So this is part of him trying to cure me.
00:41:34Fine.
00:41:35If he thinks being gay makes me some depraved freak, then that's what I'll show him.
00:41:42When I first see a man, the first thing I notice is his eyes.
00:41:47If he smells good...
00:41:50I would feel to have his arms...
00:41:54...wrapped around me.
00:41:58That's just the initial attraction.
00:42:01The next layer is more intense.
00:42:06It's more...
00:42:08...feral.
00:42:15Go on.
00:42:23I think about ripping off your priest's collar.
00:42:27About you kissing me.
00:42:30Touching me.
00:42:33You're tongue on my jaw, on my neck.
00:42:39I think about you taking me into the chapel.
00:42:42Bending me over the altar.
00:42:44And telling me to worship you.
00:42:49Do you want me to worship you?
00:42:56Father Alexander?
00:43:00You still there?
00:43:05Looks like I won this little game.
00:43:08Wait, wait!
00:43:09Get your hands off me!
00:43:11Do you think it's funny to make a mockery of our faith?
00:43:13I am not making a mockery of your faith.
00:43:15I'm making a mockery of you!
00:43:19I am not making a mockery of your faith.
00:43:20Mock me all you want.
00:43:22But the more you disrespect the house of God,
00:43:24the more I'll add to your punishment.
00:43:26Punishment?
00:43:27Mm-hmm.
00:43:28Seven Hail Marys.
00:43:30Put out all the candles,
00:43:31and polish all the brass.
00:43:33There is like a hundred candlesticks in here.
00:43:36That'll take me hours.
00:43:37Exactly.
00:43:38Now you better get started.
00:43:40When you're finished,
00:43:41your bedroom is down the hallway in the rectory.
00:43:43Don't miss anything.
00:43:45I will know.
00:43:48How can a priest be such an arrogant asshole?
00:43:53And hot.
00:44:00Oh, shit.
00:44:01Where did Father Alexander say my room was again?
00:44:06Oh, Father.
00:44:08Please forgive me for the
00:44:11desires I'm harboring in my soul.
00:44:14For the carnal thoughts in my mind.
00:44:21For the feral need.
00:44:25The next layer is more intense.
00:44:28It's more...
00:44:30feral.
00:44:32Could Father Alexander be really praying over how I made him feel?
00:44:36I've never quite felt a pull like this.
00:44:40God.
00:44:41It makes me feel...
00:44:43hot.
00:44:47And Theo...
00:44:52hearing him on the other side of the confessional.
00:44:56Knowing just exactly what he wanted me to do.
00:45:01I mean, it almost...
00:45:02It almost...
00:45:05It almost makes me think he needs another reminder
00:45:09that eavesdropping is a sin.
00:45:16Hear anything interesting, Theo?
00:45:19How did you know I was there?
00:45:21I heard your footsteps approaching before you even got to my door.
00:45:25You threw such a fit when I teased you in there,
00:45:26but what?
00:45:27It's okay that you do the exact same thing?
00:45:29Yeah, I was teaching you a lesson.
00:45:32Here.
00:45:35That's bullshit.
00:45:37You were airing your deep, dark, hidden desires
00:45:39and then you were pretending that it's a joke.
00:45:41I'm a priest.
00:45:43We don't have desires.
00:45:44Everybody has desires.
00:45:46You're just repressing yours
00:45:48and pretending that you're better than everyone else.
00:45:50You think you have me figured out, don't you?
00:45:53You are just like every other bigot in this town,
00:45:55hiding behind religion to justify their hate.
00:45:58It's not hard, right?
00:46:01Are you sure it's not hard, Theo?
00:46:08Holy shit, does my priest have a boner for me?
00:46:30Get out.
00:46:32What?
00:46:33Get out!
00:46:35Dad, we're like five miles from home.
00:46:38It's raining.
00:46:39The church is your home now.
00:46:42So you get rid of your affliction.
00:46:46You're seriously kicking me out because I'm gay?
00:46:50Dad.
00:46:52What about school?
00:46:53The church has a school program,
00:46:55which you will attend.
00:46:57And if you want to come home,
00:46:58you better hope they cure you.
00:47:01Now out.
00:47:01The new priest is expecting you.
00:47:14I told my dad I was gay
00:47:15and in less than 24 hours,
00:47:17he dumped me at this church for what?
00:47:19Conversion camp?
00:47:24Fuck this.
00:47:25I'm 18.
00:47:26I'm going to find my own way out of this town.
00:47:38You lost a stupid trying to get out of this town as fast as possible.
00:47:45This alley is a ferry-free zone.
00:47:48You're kind ain't welcome here.
00:47:50It's great because I don't want to be here either.
00:47:54You can't leave that easy.
00:47:55We've got a reputation on school.
00:47:57Come on, come on.
00:47:58Switchblade.
00:48:00Switchblade.
00:48:01Hey!
00:48:03Please, please, please.
00:48:04I'm going to enjoy making you breathe, homo.
00:48:06Stop, please.
00:48:12Step away from him!
00:48:15Did my priest just save me?
00:48:18Father Alexander!
00:48:20We weren't...
00:48:21You have ten seconds to leave.
00:48:23Ten.
00:48:25Nine.
00:48:27Eight.
00:48:38You're Theomart, yes?
00:48:40Yes.
00:48:42And you're...
00:48:43The new head priest at Sacred Heart.
00:48:45Which means you're my responsibility.
00:48:47Let's go.
00:48:49No.
00:48:50I'm not going anywhere near that fucking church.
00:48:54We're not having this discussion in the rain.
00:48:56So either you come with me now, willingly, or I make you.
00:49:00Your choice.
00:49:14What?
00:49:17Priests are like, normally old and gray.
00:49:22And?
00:49:22They don't usually look like you.
00:49:28And what do I look like?
00:49:31I don't know.
00:49:32I don't know.
00:49:36Of course you do, or you wouldn't have said anything.
00:49:38Say it.
00:49:40Well, like, like, you're young.
00:49:42You're like, you know, you're 21 or 22, and that's, like, that's too young to be a priest.
00:49:48You're hot.
00:49:49I mean, like, someone that hot, they don't be a priest.
00:49:52They're like a model or an actor.
00:49:57Being ugly is not a prerequisite to be a priest.
00:50:01Control yourself, Theo.
00:50:02You cannot be eye-fucking your new priest.
00:50:05God, he's the hottest man I've ever seen.
00:50:08What did you just say?
00:50:12Uh, I said you're the wettest man I've ever seen.
00:50:16Right.
00:50:19Well, then dry me off.
00:50:24You want me to dry you off?
00:50:27Don't make me repeat myself.
00:50:44Stop.
00:50:45Is he telling me to stop because he doesn't want the gay guy touching him?
00:50:49Or because he's feeling the tension between us?
00:50:52I'll take it from here.
00:50:55He just doesn't want a gay guy touching him.
00:50:57Got it.
00:51:01Look.
00:51:03I don't want you here.
00:51:05Well, that's good.
00:51:06Because I don't want to be here either, so we're on the same page.
00:51:09But your father sits on the parish council.
00:51:13And my future here depends on his recommendation.
00:51:16So what's your big plan?
00:51:18You're going to make me pray the gay away?
00:51:19Do you think that'll work?
00:51:21You have got to be fucking kidding me.
00:51:23I am not doing this, all right?
00:51:25This whole town, it's bigoted and oppressive and it all stems from this fucking church.
00:51:29You don't know me.
00:51:31All right?
00:51:32And you don't know how I run this church.
00:51:33Yeah, and I don't want to.
00:51:35I just want out of all of this.
00:51:37Yeah, well, it doesn't matter what you want.
00:51:39And your father has made it sufficiently clear what you are to me.
00:51:42And what is that, father?
00:51:46My personal altar boy.
00:51:54Aren't altar boy's children?
00:51:56Last time I checked, being 18 makes you an adult.
00:52:02Even though you don't act like one.
00:52:04Oh, so making me your altar boy is a personal fetish of yours then.
00:52:09Got it.
00:52:10You know what?
00:52:11Nothing is going to happen like that between us.
00:52:13I'm not like that.
00:52:15Being married to God is the straightest thing in the world.
00:52:19My faith may be a joke to you, but it's my life.
00:52:24Okay?
00:52:29And this, this is the house of God.
00:52:33My house.
00:52:34And while you're here, you will respect that.
00:52:38Now, get changed and meet me in the chapel.
00:52:42Okay?
00:52:43There are people out there waiting for me to help them.
00:52:46Well, I've been saving you.
00:52:54He may be hot, but he's a fucking grade-A asshole.
00:53:00So I have to pretend to give this a shot.
00:53:15I've asked God to take away my sinful thoughts, but they still plague me, Father.
00:53:23How may I help you with this, sister?
00:53:25I need you to help me act on them.
00:53:33Maybe if I act on them, the urge will disappear.
00:53:37I won't feel so hot every time I look at you.
00:53:41I'm sorry, sister, but I'm afraid giving in to your sins only fuels them.
00:53:46Instead, just do five Hail Marys and let God console you.
00:53:51Damn.
00:53:52I got a big reaction from the priest patting him down with a towel.
00:53:56There's no way that Father Alexander is gay.
00:54:11Theo, eavesdropping, especially upon the desires of others, is a sin.
00:54:15Well, I am pretty sure that a nun trying to fuck her priest is worse.
00:54:20Oh, by the way, just a little tip for you.
00:54:23All those women, they don't want your help.
00:54:26They just want your dick.
00:54:29You will respect the church while you are here.
00:54:32I'm just being honest.
00:54:33Lying's a sin, is it not?
00:54:35You're right.
00:54:36Your turn.
00:54:37For what?
00:54:38To confess your sins, altar boy.
00:54:40Hey!
00:54:41Hey!
00:54:44I am so sorry to do this to all of you, but it appears our confessional hours have shifted
00:54:49to Sunday.
00:54:51So, please come back and I'll give each of you ample time.
00:55:00May God, who has enlightened every heart, help you to know thy sins and trust in his mercy.
00:55:07Father, please forgive me, for I have sinned.
00:55:11It's been three days since I last touched myself.
00:55:15I've been a bad, bad boy.
00:55:18You know, Theo, if you took this seriously, you might actually find it useful.
00:55:22Why should I take any of this seriously?
00:55:24Your father sent you here to bolster your faith.
00:55:27No, my dad sent me here because I'm gay.
00:55:29If you expect me to say that being gay is a sin, you can forget it.
00:55:32Theo, I'm not moralizing your sexuality, alright?
00:55:37I'm not that kind of priest.
00:55:43What kind of priest are you?
00:55:47One who wants to understand.
00:55:51Tell me, Theo, what thoughts led you to believe you wanted to lie with other men?
00:55:58You talk about this like it's just a sex thing.
00:56:01I mean, is it not?
00:56:01No, I've never even been with another man, but I still know that I'm gay.
00:56:11How?
00:56:12It's like, it's the attraction to other men like when I first saw you.
00:56:21Go on.
00:56:34Why would he want to understand what it's like to realize you're gay?
00:56:39Unless he might be gay?
00:56:41Theo, I get that it's hard to talk about.
00:56:47But if I'm going to help you, I need to hear it from your own.
00:56:51That's why you want to help.
00:56:53Of course.
00:56:55Why else would I want to know?
00:56:57So this is part of him trying to cure me.
00:57:00Fine.
00:57:00If he thinks being gay makes me some depraved freak, then that's what I'll show him.
00:57:07When I first see a man, the first thing I notice is his eyes.
00:57:12If he smells good, I would feel to have his arms wrapped around me.
00:57:23That's just the initial attraction.
00:57:27The next layer is more intense.
00:57:30It's more feral.
00:57:48I think about ripping off your priest collar.
00:57:53About you kissing me.
00:57:55Touching me.
00:57:58Your tongue on my jaw, on my neck.
00:58:04I think about you taking me into the chapel, bending me over the altar, and telling me to worship you.
00:58:15Do you want me to worship you?
00:58:22Father Alexander?
00:58:25You still there?
00:58:30Looks like I won this little game.
00:58:33Wait, wait!
00:58:34Get your hands off me!
00:58:36Do you think it's funny to make a mockery of our faith?
00:58:38I am not making a mockery of your faith.
00:58:40I am not making a mockery of you.
00:58:45Fine.
00:58:46Mock me all you want.
00:58:47But the more you disrespect the house of God, the more I'll add to your punishment.
00:58:51Punishment?
00:58:53Seven Hail Marys.
00:58:55Put out all the candles, and polish all the brass.
00:58:59There is like a hundred candlesticks in here.
00:59:01That'll take me hours.
00:59:14How can a priest be such an arrogant asshole?
00:59:18And hot.
00:59:25Oh shit.
00:59:27Where did Father Alexander see my room was again?
00:59:31Oh, Father.
00:59:33Please forgive me for the desires I'm harboring in my soul.
00:59:39For the carnal thoughts in my mind.
00:59:47For the feral need.
00:59:50The next layer is more intense.
00:59:54It's more...
00:59:56feral.
00:59:58Could Father Alexander be really praying over how I made him feel?
01:00:02I've never quite felt a pull like this.
01:00:05God.
01:00:06It makes me feel...
01:00:09hot.
01:00:13And Theo...
01:00:17hearing him on the other side of the confessional.
01:00:22knowing just exactly what he wanted me to do.
01:00:26I mean, it almost, it almost, it almost makes me think he needs another reminder that eavesdropping is a sin.
01:00:41hear anything interesting, Theo?
01:00:44How did you know I was there?
01:00:47I heard your footsteps approaching before you even got to my door.
01:00:50You threw such a fit when I teased you in there, but what, it's okay that you do the exact
01:00:53same thing?
01:00:54Yeah, I was teaching you a lesson, Theo.
01:01:01That's bullshit.
01:01:02You were airing your deep, dark, hidden desires, and then you were pretending that it's a joke.
01:01:07I'm a priest.
01:01:08We don't have desires.
01:01:10Everybody has desires.
01:01:12You're just repressing yours and pretending that you're better than everyone else.
01:01:15You think you have me figured out, don't you?
01:01:18You are just like every other bigot in this town, hiding behind religion to justify their hate.
01:01:23It's not hard, right?
01:01:26Are you sure it's not hard, Theo?
01:01:34Holy shit, does my priest have a boner for me?
01:01:55Get out.
01:01:58What?
01:01:58Get out!
01:02:00Dad, we're like, we're like five miles from home.
01:02:04It's raining.
01:02:05The church is your home now.
01:02:07So you get rid of your affliction.
01:02:12You're seriously kicking me out because I'm gay?
01:02:16Dad, what about school?
01:02:19The church has a school program, which you will attend.
01:02:22And if you want to come home, you better hope they cure you.
01:02:26Now out.
01:02:27The new priest is expecting you.
01:02:39I told my dad I was gay and in less than 24 hours he dumped me at this church for
01:02:44what?
01:02:45Conversion camp?
01:02:49Fuck this.
01:02:51I'm 18.
01:02:51I'm going to find my own way out of this town.
01:03:04I'm 18.
01:03:05I'm going to find my own way out of this town.
01:03:06How fast is possible?
01:03:10This alley is a ferry free zone.
01:03:13Your kind ain't welcome here.
01:03:15It's great, because I don't want to be here either.
01:03:18Nah, you can't leave that easy.
01:03:20We've got a reputation on cold.
01:03:23Flip-flake.
01:03:27Hey!
01:03:28Please, please!
01:03:29I'm gonna enjoy making you bleed, homo.
01:03:31Stop! Please!
01:03:38Step away from him!
01:03:41Did my priest just...
01:03:43save me?
01:03:44Father Alexander!
01:03:46We weren't- You have ten seconds to leave.
01:03:48Ten.
01:03:51Nine.
01:03:52Eight.
01:04:03You're Theo Martin, yes?
01:04:06Yes.
01:04:07And you're...
01:04:09The new head priest at Sacred Heart.
01:04:11Which means you're my responsibility.
01:04:13Let's go.
01:04:14No.
01:04:16I'm not going anywhere near that fucking church.
01:04:19We're not having this discussion in the rain.
01:04:22So either you come with me now willingly,
01:04:24or I make you.
01:04:25Your choice.
01:04:40What?
01:04:42Uh...
01:04:43Priests are like...
01:04:44normally old and...
01:04:46gray.
01:04:47And?
01:04:48They don't...
01:04:49usually look like you.
01:04:54And what do I look like?
01:04:57I don't...
01:04:58I don't know.
01:05:01Of course you do, or you wouldn't have said anything.
01:05:03Say it.
01:05:05Well, like...
01:05:06Like...
01:05:07You're...
01:05:07You're young.
01:05:08You're like...
01:05:08You know, you're twenty-one or twenty-two.
01:05:10And that's...
01:05:10Like, that's too young to be a priest.
01:05:14You're hot.
01:05:14I mean, like...
01:05:15Someone that hot, they don't be a priest.
01:05:17They're like a model or an actor.
01:05:22Being ugly is not a prerequisite to be a priest.
01:05:26Control yourself, Theo.
01:05:27You cannot be eye-fucking your new priest.
01:05:31God, he's the hottest man I've ever seen.
01:05:33What'd you just say?
01:05:37Uh...
01:05:38I said you're the...
01:05:40wettest man I've ever seen.
01:05:42Right.
01:05:44Well then dry me off.
01:05:49You...
01:05:50want me to dry you off?
01:05:52Don't make me repeat myself.
01:06:09Stop.
01:06:11Is he telling me to stop because he doesn't want the gay guy touching him?
01:06:14Or because he's feeling the tension between us?
01:06:18I'll take it from here.
01:06:20He just doesn't want a gay guy touching him.
01:06:23Got it.
01:06:27Look...
01:06:28I don't want you here.
01:06:30Well that's good.
01:06:32Because I don't want to be here either, so we're on the same page.
01:06:35But...
01:06:36Your father sits on the parish council.
01:06:39And my future here depends on his recommendation.
01:06:41So what's your big plan?
01:06:43You gonna make me pray the gay away?
01:06:45Do you think that'll work?
01:06:46You've gotta be fucking kidding me.
01:06:49I am not doing this, alright?
01:06:51This whole town, it's bigoted and oppressive and it all stems from this fucking church.
01:06:55You don't know me.
01:06:57Alright?
01:06:57And you don't know how I run this church.
01:06:59Yeah, and I don't want to.
01:07:00I just want out of all of this.
01:07:02Yeah, well it doesn't matter what you want.
01:07:04And your father has made it sufficiently clear what you are to me.
01:07:07And what is that father?
01:07:12My personal altar boy.
01:07:19Aren't altar boys children?
01:07:21Last time I checked, being 18 makes you an adult.
01:07:28Even though you don't act like one.
01:07:30Oh.
01:07:31So making me your altar boy is a personal fetish of yours then.
01:07:34Got it.
01:07:36You know what?
01:07:36Nothing is going to happen like that between us.
01:07:38I'm not like that.
01:07:40Being married to God is the straightest thing in the world.
01:07:45My faith may be a joke to you, but it's my life.
01:07:50Okay?
01:07:55And this, this is the house of God.
01:07:58My house.
01:08:00And while you're here, you will respect that.
01:08:03Now, get changed and meet me in the chapel.
01:08:08Okay?
01:08:08There are people out there waiting for me to help them.
01:08:12While I've been saving you.
01:08:19He may be hot, but he's a fucking grade A asshole.
01:08:25So I have to pretend to give this a shot.
01:08:40I've asked God to take away my sinful thoughts, but they still plague me, Father.
01:08:48How may I help you with this, sister?
01:08:50I need you to help me act on them.
01:08:58Maybe if I act on them, the urge will disappear.
01:09:02I won't feel so hot every time I look at you.
01:09:07I'm sorry, sister, but I'm afraid giving into your sins only fuels them.
01:09:12Instead, just do five Hail Marys and let God console you.
01:09:17Damn.
01:09:17I got a bigger reaction from the priest patting him down with a towel.
01:09:21There's no way that Father Alexander is gay.
01:09:36Theo, eavesdropping, especially upon the desires of others, is a sin.
01:09:40Well, I am pretty sure that a nun trying to fuck her priest is worse.
01:09:45Oh, by the way, just a little tip for you.
01:09:48All those women, they don't want your help.
01:09:52They just want your dick.
01:09:55You will respect the church while you are here.
01:09:57I'm just being honest.
01:09:58Lying's a sin, is it not?
01:10:00You're right. Your turn.
01:10:02For what?
01:10:04To confess your sins, altar boy.
01:10:09I am so sorry to do this to all of you,
01:10:12but it appears our confessional hours have shifted to Sunday.
01:10:16So, please come back and I'll give each of you ample time.
01:10:26May God, who has enlightened every heart, help you to know thy sins and trust in his mercy.
01:10:32Father, please forgive me, for I have sinned.
01:10:36It's been three days since I last touched myself.
01:10:40I've been a bad, bad boy.
01:10:43You know, Theo, if you took this seriously, you might actually find it useful.
01:10:47Why should I take any of this seriously?
01:10:50Your father sent you here to bolster your faith.
01:10:52No, my dad sent me here because I'm gay.
01:10:55If you expect me to say that being gay is a sin, you can forget it.
01:10:57Theo, I'm not moralizing your sexuality, alright?
01:11:02I'm not that kind of priest.
01:11:09What kind of priest are you?
01:11:13One who wants to understand.
01:11:16Tell me, Theo, what thoughts led you to believe you wanted to lie with other men?
01:11:23You talk about this like it's just a sex thing.
01:11:26I mean, is it not?
01:11:28No, I'm...
01:11:29I've never even been with another man, but I still know that I'm gay.
01:11:36How?
01:11:37It's like...
01:11:38It's the attraction to other men like when I first saw you.
01:11:46Go on.
01:11:51You can't be serious, I...
01:11:55I am.
01:11:57I want to understand.
01:11:59Why would he want to understand what it's like to realize you're gay?
01:12:05Unless...
01:12:05He might be gay?
01:12:07Theo, I...
01:12:08I...
01:12:09I...
01:12:10I get that it's...
01:12:11It's hard to talk about.
01:12:13But if I'm gonna help you, I need to hear it from your own...
01:12:17That's why you want to help.
01:12:18Of course.
01:12:20I mean, why else would I want to know?
01:12:22No.
01:12:22So this is part of him trying to cure me.
01:12:25Fine.
01:12:26If he thinks being gay makes me some depraved freak, then that's what I'll show him.
01:12:33When I first see a man, the first thing I notice is his eyes.
01:12:38If he smells good...
01:12:41I would feel to have his arms...
01:12:44Wrapped around me.
01:12:49That's just the initial attraction.
01:12:52The next layer is more intense.
01:12:56It's more...
01:12:59Feral.
01:13:07Feral.
01:13:07Go on.
01:13:14I think about ripping off your priest collar.
01:13:18About you kissing me.
01:13:21Touching me.
01:13:24Your tongue, on my jaw, on my neck.
01:13:30I think about you taking me into the chapel, bending me over the altar and telling me to worship you.
01:13:40Do you want me to worship you?
01:13:47Father Alexander?
01:13:50You still there?
01:13:56Looks like I won this little game.
01:13:59Wait, wait!
01:14:00Get your hands off me!
01:14:02Do you think it's funny to make a mockery of our faith?
01:14:04I am not making a mockery of your faith, I'm making a mockery of you!
01:14:10Fine.
01:14:11Mock me all you want, but the more you disrespect the house of God, the more I'll add to your
01:14:16punishment.
01:14:17Punishment?
01:14:17Mm-hmm.
01:14:19Seven Hail Marys.
01:14:20Put out all the candles and polish all the brass.
01:14:24There is like a hundred candlesticks in here, that'll take me hours!
01:14:28Exactly.
01:14:29Now you better get started.
01:14:31When you're finished, your bedroom is down the hallway in the rectory.
01:14:33Don't miss anything.
01:14:36I will know.
01:14:39How can a priest be such an arrogant asshole?
01:14:43And hot.
01:14:51Oh shit, where did Father Alexander say my room was again?
01:14:56Oh Father, please forgive me for the desires I'm harboring in my soul.
01:15:05For the carnal thoughts in my mind.
01:15:12For the feral need.
01:15:16The next layer is more intense.
01:15:19It's more...
01:15:21feral.
01:15:23Could Father Alexander be really praying over how I made him feel?
01:15:28I've never quite felt a pull like this.
01:15:30God.
01:15:32It makes me feel...
01:15:34hot.
01:15:37And Theo.
01:15:42Hearing him on the other side of the confessional.
01:15:47Knowing just exactly what he wanted me to do.
01:15:51I mean it almost...
01:15:53It almost...
01:15:56It almost makes me think he needs another reminder that eavesdropping is a sin.
01:16:06Hear anything interesting?
01:16:08Theo?
01:16:10How did you know I was there?
01:16:12I heard your footsteps approaching before you even got to my door.
01:16:15You threw such a fit when I teased you in there, but what, it's okay that you do the exact
01:16:19same thing?
01:16:20Yeah, I was teaching you a lesson.
01:16:23Here.
01:16:26That's bullshit.
01:16:28You were airing your deep dark hidden desires and then you were pretending that it's a joke.
01:16:32I'm a priest.
01:16:33We don't have desires.
01:16:35Everybody has desires.
01:16:37You're just repressing yours and pretending that you're better than everyone else.
01:16:41You think you have me figured out, don't you?
01:16:43You are just like every other bigot in this town, hiding behind religion to justify their hate.
01:16:49It's not hard, right?
01:16:52Are you sure it's not hard, Theo?
01:16:55Yeah.
01:16:59Holy shit, does my priest have a boner for me?
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