00:02Feminism is not men vs women. It is men and women against patriarchy.
00:07Let me start with something that shouldn't be controversial.
00:10It is not about hating men.
00:12And if your definition is women are better than men, then congratulations.
00:16You have misunderstood the whole concept.
00:17Because this movement is not asking women to replace men at the top.
00:21It's asking why there has to be a hierarchy at all.
00:25And this is where I think we have completely messed up the conversation.
00:28We have turned this movement to a gender war.
00:31Women say something about sexism, someone responds.
00:34What about men?
00:35Men talk about their own struggles, their feelings.
00:38Someone responds, but women have it worse.
00:40And suddenly we are keeping score.
00:42Who suffers more?
00:44Who has it harder?
00:45Who is the bigger victim?
00:46Why are we doing this?
00:49Patriarchy doesn't mean all men are evil.
00:51It doesn't mean every man wakes up plotting how to oppress women.
00:54It means we have inherited systems, expectations, and ideas about gender that can restrict both
01:01men and women.
01:02And here's the part that people don't talk about enough.
01:06Patriarchy hurts men too.
01:09A boy is told, don't cry.
01:11Man up.
01:11Be strong.
01:12Don't be weak.
01:13Don't ask for help.
01:15Your job is to provide.
01:16Your worth is measured by how much you earn.
01:20And then we grow up and wonder why so many men struggle to express vulnerability.
01:26Women are told, be successful but not too intimidating.
01:30Be independent but don't be difficult.
01:32Be attractive but don't seek attention.
01:35Have children but don't sacrifice your career.
01:37Have a career but don't neglect your family.
01:39And somehow, we've convinced ourselves that these impossible expectations are just biology.
01:46They are not.
01:47They are culture.
01:49They are conditioning.
01:50And this movement is supposed to question that conditioning.
01:54But here's what I want to challenge the feminists too.
01:56I want to challenge you guys.
01:58I want to ask if your feminism requires you to hate men.
02:02It's not liberation.
02:03If you believe that every man is inherently dangerous, then that's not equality.
02:08If you think men's problems don't matter because women have historically suffered more,
02:13you're representing the exact logic you're trying to dismantle.
02:16That someone suffering only matters if it belongs to the right group.
02:21And men need to challenge other men too.
02:24Because this movement isn't asking men to apologize for being born male.
02:28It's asking them to examine the systems they participate in.
02:32Call out the sexist joke.
02:35Question the double standard.
02:36Don't laugh when someone humiliates a woman.
02:39Don't tell your daughter she's asking for it because of what she's wearing.
02:43Don't teach your son that emotional vulnerability makes him less of a man.
02:48And this is where I have a question for the men who oppose this movement.
02:52Who say it isn't necessary.
02:54Who refuse to encourage it.
02:56Who ask, why should I care?
02:58This isn't my problem.
03:00I want you to think about the women in your life.
03:02Your sister, your mother, your wife, your daughter, your girlfriend, anyone.
03:08Imagine one of them is out after 9pm.
03:11Maybe she's coming home from college.
03:13Maybe she's returning from work.
03:14Maybe she's meeting her friend.
03:16And you're waiting for her to come home.
03:19And you're worried.
03:20You're checking your phone.
03:21You're wondering where she is.
03:23You're telling her to call you when she reaches.
03:26Maybe you're even telling her, don't go alone.
03:29Take a cab.
03:30Share your location.
03:32Call me when you get home.
03:33And I don't blame you for being afraid though.
03:36But I want you to ask yourself just one question.
03:39Why is it exactly that you're scared?
03:42Why does a woman simply being outside at night feels dangerous?
03:45Why do you think she needs to constantly calculate her safety?
03:51Why does her clothing become a conversation?
03:54Why does her location matter?
03:56Why does she have to think about which road she takes home?
04:00Why does she have to hold her keys between her fingers?
04:04Why does she have to text someone I've reached?
04:07Ask yourself, why?
04:10And that question is my answer to why we need more men supporting this movement.
04:16Because feminism isn't telling you to hate yourself for being a man.
04:20It's asking you to look at the world your mother, your sister, your daughter, your wife or your girlfriend has
04:26to navigate.
04:27And ask yourself why that world still exists.
04:30And if you genuinely love the women in your life, you shouldn't only want them to be safe.
04:35You should want to understand why they aren't.
04:38That's why we need more men supporting feminism.
04:41And more importantly, men encouraging other men to support it.
04:45Because sometimes a woman saying this is a problem gets dismissed as bitterness.
04:51But when a man says no, she's right.
04:54We need to do better.
04:56Another man might actually reason.
04:57And women, we need to challenge women too.
05:01Stop policing other women's choices.
05:04Stop calling women sluts for choices you would make differently.
05:08Stop assuming a woman who wants marriage is oppressed or that a woman who doesn't want a child or a
05:15children is selfish.
05:16Freedom means she gets to choose.
05:19That's the point.
05:20And that's where I wish people understood this movement doesn't need men to lose for women to win.
05:27A man being emotional doesn't make women weaker.
05:33A woman earning more money doesn't make men weaker.
05:37A father staying home with his children doesn't make him less of a man.
05:41A mother choosing a career doesn't make her less of a woman.
05:44A man refusing violence doesn't make him feminine.
05:47A woman refusing motherhood doesn't make her incomplete.
05:51We're not supposed to be fighting each other.
05:54We're supposed to be fighting the ridiculous rules that are told us that we're allowed to be.
05:59So no, it isn't about men versus women.
06:04It's men and women versus the idea that your gender should determine your worth, your freedom, your emotions, your career,
06:11your body or your future.
06:13Because the goal isn't to create a world where women become more successful, more powerful, enough to control men.
06:20The goal is to create a world where nobody needs permission to become who they are.
06:25And if that's what feminism means, then maybe the real question isn't, why should men support feminism?
06:32Maybe it's, why shouldn't they?
06:35Think about it.
06:36No
06:37Not
06:39I
06:39Hope
06:40E
06:41You
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