00:00Why are we so eager to find the meaning of life?
00:03Without it, life itself, the most precious thing we have, feels empty and worthless.
00:09That thought is unbearable, but in truth there is meaning.
00:13You just need to know where to look.
00:16My name is Alvira Berry.
00:18I'm a writer, philosopher and teacher,
00:20and today we are tackling one of the biggest topics out there.
00:30Throughout history, people have sought the meaning of life,
00:33and religion has made the most progress in this quest.
00:36For the common people, it went like this.
00:39The meaning of life was to improve their situation.
00:43If you were born a slave in ancient Egypt,
00:46a poor farmer in China or a servant in Sarist Russia,
00:49changing your status in this life wasn't an option.
00:53But by following your religion's teachings,
00:56you could hope for a better afterlife.
00:59Whether that meant going to heaven, being reborn into a lucky life,
01:04or entering an underworld where at least no one would hit you with a shovel.
01:09These were meaningful goals to strive for.
01:13For those with more developed imaginations,
01:16the call was union with God
01:18or liberation from endless reincarnations to achieve peace.
01:27Life's meaning
01:28With the rise of science, many people began seeing life's meaning in leaving behind a legacy
01:33or enjoying life to the fullest.
01:36The problem is that these options lack a sense of loftiness and significance.
01:41What's the point, you might wonder?
01:44Leaving behind problem-ridden children,
01:46a chest of blankets, and a couple of worn-out shoes isn't exactly inspiring.
01:53After all, not everyone can discover the law of gravity or decode DNA.
01:57When modern people ask psychologists or life coaches what is the meaning of life,
02:03the usual answer is that meaning lies in cooperation, understanding, and service.
02:09But does that inspire?
02:11Not really.
02:12Because it overlooks one key aspect of human thinking.
02:15Not really.
02:20We humans think in stories.
02:24Whatever you do, regret, or dream about is always a narrative.
02:29You, the main character, wants X, did Y, and got Z.
02:33Meaning in these stories is your internal assessment of the effort put in versus the result achieved.
02:41It's just like in a movie or novel.
02:45If the effort is huge but the result is minimal, the story feels pointless.
02:50For instance, if a detective spends an entire movie investigating stolen
02:55meetings from a school clock room, the story loses its impact.
02:59But if the detective investigates a murder, suddenly those same actions,
03:04interviewing witnesses, lineups, chasing suspects, gain purpose.
03:10In the past, people found meaning in the promise of an afterlife reward,
03:14because religion helped them construct a clear story with a significant outcome.
03:20For example, I'll fast, make offerings, and follow the rules, and then I'll go into heaven.
03:27Right now, things are hard, but in heaven, everything will be different.
03:31It's a significant goal worth enduring hardships for.
03:35But when we gain the ability to change our lives here and now, such stories lose their appeal.
03:42Modern people no longer find comfort in this promise of afterlife happiness.
03:46They want to achieve something significant in this life.
03:49Because now it's possible.
03:52The only question is how?
03:59What is the meaning of life?
03:59There is no universal formula for the meaning of life because we are all different with different values.
04:06Some people dream of an Olympic medal and feel it's worth years of training in risking their health.
04:14Otherwise, couldn't care less about such a goal.
04:18We can break down the different types of life meanings into four categories.
04:23First, victories, prizes, and achievements.
04:27Second, love and meaningful relationships.
04:30Third, new experiences and discovery.
04:34Four, improvement and making a significant contribution.
04:37People often desire all of these things at once, but each of us has a defining plotline
04:44that sets the genre of our lives.
04:47Without it, our story loses its meaning.
04:49Similarly, take the prince out of Cinderella's tale and the story falls apart.
04:55Remove Batman's victory over supervillains and what's left.
05:02What is the meaning of life?
05:04For those who live for victories and achievements, their life genre is action.
05:10They find meaning in winning significant prizes and awards.
05:14For those who live for love, their genre is either romance or family saga,
05:19depending on the stage of their relationships.
05:22For those who seek new experiences and discoveries, their life is an adventure or mystery,
05:28with the purpose of understanding something important about themselves or the world around them.
05:34For those focused on improvement, their genre is a thriller.
05:39Although many dislike this term because it often evokes images of serial killer movies.
05:45But it's not about that.
05:47Their story revolves around avoiding negative outcomes like unrealized potential, poverty,
05:54or an unfortunate legacy.
05:56Their fear of ending up in a bad situation shapes the central theme of their narrative,
06:02giving it meaning.
06:08If someone feels they are living a story that aligns with their true values
06:13and achieving what genuinely matters to them,
06:16they typically don't struggle with the questions about life's meaning.
06:21But when someone is following a script written by others,
06:25all their achievements along that path can feel empty.
06:30For example, parents might push their daughter to attend law school,
06:35expecting her to become a successful lawyer and earn big money consulting wealthy clients.
06:42However, this is not her story.
06:44Because her aspirations revolve around love, family, and raising children.
06:50She follows her parents' advice, hoping to earn their love and approval in the first place.
06:57Statistics show that in the US, high rates of alcoholism are prevalent among those in prestigious,
07:04high-paying careers like lawyers and medical professionals.
07:08If you spend years heading in the wrong direction,
07:11you are inevitably going to feel like what you are doing is meaningless.
07:20To discover the meaning of your life, take the quiz on my website alvirabari.com
07:26to identify your personality archetype and its purpose.
07:29You'll find the link in the description below.
07:33This will help you answer the questions of who am I and why I am this way.
07:38If you are looking for deeper insights,
07:41you can book a consultation with me to gain clarity and understanding of your inner world.
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