- il y a 2 jours
They called me gross then i changed everything - FULL (Reel Drama)
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00:10During the months I had a crush on Lucas Reed, the football captain.
00:14I tried everything to lose weight.
00:15One day after volleyball practice, I almost passed out from hunger.
00:19Lucas caught my wrist and pulled me into a quiet corner beside the gym.
00:24Can you stop starving yourself?
00:28If anyone makes another joke joke about your body, I'll shut them up.
00:32That was the day I thought Lucas might like me too.
00:35So after our football team won the next game, I walked onto the field.
00:45Lucas, I like you.
00:51What? Lily Taylor, did you just say you like Lucas?
00:55A voice carried across the field.
00:57For one second, everyone went silent.
01:03Damn, Lucas really is something.
01:05Even the fatty has a crush on him.
01:08Lucas, is that why you keep rejecting girls?
01:11You were saving yourself for her?
01:14Are you serious?
01:17My face burned.
01:19I could not say another word.
01:22Then a loud thug cut off the field.
01:24A football shot past my ear and slammed into the ground behind me.
01:29The boys who had been laughing shut up.
01:31Lucas looked down at me.
01:32I just want to know one thing.
01:35What made you think you could confess to me?
01:37Did you think my standards were that low?
01:39My whole body went stiff.
01:41The heat drained from my face.
01:43Don't you think you're kind of gross?
01:45I left the room in a day later.
01:47I could not take it anymore.
01:49I ran into the restaurant and locked myself inside a stall.
01:55Suddenly, there was a cold water on the floor.
02:00Next time, look in a mirror before you embarrass Lucas.
02:04I stood there without moving.
02:08Cold water dripped from my hair onto the floor.
02:12I had been mocked for my body for years.
02:14But Lucas was the first boy who ever defended me.
02:18For a while, I thought my life could be different.
02:22But today, Lucas crushed that dream himself.
02:26I finally understood.
02:28Girls like me did not get exceptions.
02:33The next morning, one of Lucas' friends came over to move his desk.
02:38Lucas said he felt sick after yesterday.
02:41He's taking a few days off.
02:42He asked me to move his seat.
02:47After saying that, he seemed to realize how cruel it sounded.
02:51He met my numb eyes and quickly added.
02:53Not because of you.
02:55Don't overthink it.
02:56I blinked hard.
02:57What's the matter, Lily?
02:59Cat got your tongue?
03:00People hate me this much.
03:01I only ate a little more than they did.
03:05Was that really so disgusting?
03:08Three days later, Lucas came back.
03:11He walked into the classroom with his arm around Bella Hart's waist.
03:16Bella was captain of the cheer squad and every guy's dream girl.
03:20And I was Lily Taylor.
03:23A nobody people only remembered when they needed a joke.
03:27Chase could not help whistling.
03:29Damn, Lucas.
03:30Finally got yourself a girlfriend?
03:31So is it real or just for show?
03:35Bella pouted like she was offended.
03:37What do you mean?
03:38Do I look like the kind of girl who lets random guys put their hands on my waist?
03:43Lucas lifted his brow lazily.
03:45Lucas did not deny it.
03:47People started cheering and teasing me.
03:49I lowered my head and looked at my workbook.
03:52At least no one cared about what happened that day anymore.
03:56No one had time to laugh at me.
03:57That was already good enough.
04:05After that, I buried myself in schoolwork.
04:08On the next AP Calculus test, I beat Ethan Miller, the top student, for the first time.
04:13The moment class ended, Ethan moved his desk beside mine.
04:18Miss Carter said I keep messing up the written explanations.
04:22She told me to learn from you.
04:24Then he smiled at me.
04:25New seatmate. Help me out.
04:27It took me a few seconds to realize I had a seatmate again.
04:31I was a little happy, so I quickly pulled out my notebook.
04:35Here. This is what I use.
04:37When I looked up by accident, I met Lucas' eyes across the room.
04:43He had been watching us for a while.
04:45A second later, he looked away first.
04:48I did not know my confession had disgusted him that much.
04:51So much so that he could not even stand to see me doing okay.
04:55The next morning, Ethan brought me two sausage rolls.
04:58I had just taken them when Lucas walked over with a low laugh.
05:03I didn't know you had such a specific taste, man.
05:07Ethan's face changed.
05:09What do you mean?
05:14Lucas dropped a stack of printed pictures on my desk.
05:18For you.
05:20You like this type, right?
05:23Want me to bring you more tomorrow?
05:24What?
05:28Who the hell said I like fat girls?
05:32Oh.
05:33I saw you move seats. I thought you were into her.
05:37Was I wrong?
05:38Lucas' friends laughed with him.
05:43Ethan cursed under his breath.
05:46Then he moved back to his old seat without another word.
05:50From beginning to end, neither of them looked at me.
05:53But every word was about me.
05:56My eyes fell on the picture scattered across the desk.
06:00The sausage rolls in my hands went cold.
06:03Before Lucas walked away.
06:05Why would you do this?
06:09What?
06:13Are you that desperate for attention?
06:15Every guy who sits beside you gets the full treatment.
06:22After what Lucas did, everything got worse.
06:26One morning, I found my desk covered in graffiti.
06:30I kept my head down and walked to my locker.
06:33The moment I opened it, a stack of printed pictures slipped out and scattered across the floor.
06:39Students slowed down as they passed and started laughing.
06:42I crouched down and picked up the pictures one by one.
06:46After that, no one wanted to hang out with me anymore.
06:50They were afraid they would become the next target.
06:53During lunch, I sat alone under a tree and took big bites of my food.
06:57Even though I never thought about dieting again.
07:01The only time I had tried to lose weight was because I liked Lucas more than food.
07:06Now, I did not like him anymore.
07:08That Friday, we had volleyball class.
07:11Halfway through class, it started pouring.
07:15Everyone ran toward the gym entrance.
07:17They laughed and screamed while covering their heads.
07:19I followed behind them.
07:21Before I could reach the door, several girls started knocking me back and forth between them.
07:26I lost my balance and fell hard onto the wet court.
07:30My kneecap slid out of place.
07:32The pain was so sharp that I could not sit up.
07:35Then a person stopped beside me.
07:37I grabbed one pant leg without thinking.
07:41I can't stand. Can you help me?
07:44It was Lucas.
07:47No.
07:49Bella laughed beside him.
07:51Maybe if you lost weight, you wouldn't fall so hard.
07:55I was soaked through.
07:57Lucas did not look at me.
07:58He walked past me.
08:00I can't help you.
08:02Rain kept running into my mouth, but my throat still felt dry.
08:07I could only try to push myself up.
08:09Near the gym entrance, I heard people talking.
08:12She doesn't look like she's faking it.
08:13This is too much.
08:14Should we help her?
08:16You like her?
08:17You go.
08:18Who the hell said I liked fat girls?
08:21It took me almost ten minutes to sit up.
08:24I still could not stand.
08:26So I sat quietly in the rain.
08:29I forced myself to think about what grandma might make for dinner.
08:32Otherwise, the pain in my knee and the eyes behind me would break me.
08:37In the end, I got up by myself.
08:40The voices at the gym entrance never stopped.
08:43I did not dare look back.
08:46I limped to the security office and called grandma.
08:49After hearing what happened, grandma decided I needed to get stronger.
08:54From that day on, she planned my meals and made me exercise with her.
08:58If they try to knock you down again, hit back.
09:07I stayed home for two days before going back to school.
09:10That morning, grandma only let me eat one whole wheat egg sandwich.
09:13I felt miserable.
09:15But soon, Ms. Carter walked into the classroom.
09:18Behind her stood a strange transfer student.
09:21Ms. Carter looked around the room.
09:23Her eyes finally stopped at me.
09:24Sebastian Cole, sit beside Lily.
09:27After that, she hurried back to the office.
09:29Sebastian sat in the empty spot beside me.
09:32Neither of us seemed interested in talking.
09:35But Blake could never keep his voice down.
09:37Lucas, look.
09:38This guy is weird.
09:40His whole face is covered.
09:42What, is he disfigured?
09:44Probably.
09:46If he looked good, why would he hide his face?
09:50Ghost boy and chubby Lily.
09:52New couple alert.
09:54Lucas did not react.
09:55He only spun his pen lazily and said nothing.
09:58For almost a month, Sebastian and I barely spoke.
10:03I did not want to talk.
10:04I was afraid the same thing that happened with Ethan would happen again.
10:08Then one afternoon after class, I noticed Sebastian lying across his desk.
10:13After hesitating for a moment, I walked over.
10:16Do you have a stomach ache?
10:20Yeah.
10:25I'll take you to the nurse's office.
10:27Luckily, he did not pull away when I touched him.
10:29He was almost six feet two.
10:31Most of his weight leaned against me.
10:34Good thing I was sturdy.
10:35Otherwise, I would not have been able to hold him up.
10:39The nurse gave him medicine.
10:41Then she asked me to get him some water.
10:43I ran to buy it, then hurried back.
10:46By then, Sebastian was the only one left in the nurse's office.
10:49You dislike me that much and still help me?
10:52That's pretty kind of you, Lily.
10:53I don't dislike you. I thought you hated me, so I didn't talk to you.
10:56Why would I hate you?
10:59Because I'm fat.
11:01I suddenly felt he was probably not disfigured at all.
11:07After that day, Sebastian and I slowly got closer, but he was still strange.
11:12He never took off his mask.
11:14He barely talked to anyone else, but he always ran with me after school.
11:18My body changed, too.
11:21Without noticing it, I had gotten stronger.
11:24Grandma was pleased.
11:25She said I looked healthier now.
11:27I never expected Lucas to be the first person at school to notice.
11:31That afternoon, I sat on the lawn, finishing the low-fat turkey bowl Grandma had packed for me.
11:38I had just picked up my lunchbox when Lucas suddenly grabbed my wrist.
11:42You're dieting again?
11:44That's none of your business. Lucas, let go.
11:47Lucas pulled me toward the cafeteria.
11:49You get dizzy when you starve yourself. Did you forget? Planning to pass out again?
11:55If you don't let go, I'll bite you.
11:57You really don't know who is good to you?
12:01Drop the act.
12:02After that, I turned and walked back to the classroom.
12:06Sebastian was lying across his desk, alone.
12:10Is your stomach hurting again?
12:12Sebastian slowly lifted his head.
12:16Yeah.
12:17I wanted to buy medicine.
12:20But I forgot where the nurse's office was.
12:23I saw you downstairs just now, but...
12:25You were talking to some guy.
12:30So I didn't want to interrupt.
12:33Lily, it hurts.
12:34I'll go buy it for you right now. Wait here.
12:38I'll go with you. That way I can remember the route.
12:46I hurt his arm and helped him toward the nurse's office.
12:49When we went downstairs, we ran into Lucas.
12:57Sebastian suddenly lost his balance.
12:59I hurt too much to walk. Let me rest for a second, okay?
13:02I opened my mouth.
13:03But when he made another soft sound of pain, I could not refuse.
13:08Lucas's eyes turned cold at once.
13:11He had just taken one step toward us when Blake and Bella caught up from behind.
13:16Whoa! Fatty and Ghost Boy, what are you two doing?
13:20What did you call her?
13:22Fatty.
13:23Am I wrong?
13:25Sebastian punched him and he couldn't react.
13:28I rushed between them and shrugged Tyler hard.
13:31Run!
13:34Only when we reached the nurse's office did I let out a breath.
13:37Thank you, Sebastian.
13:40But next time, just ignore him.
13:42He won a taekwondo tournament before.
13:45We can't beat him.
13:51But he was bullying you.
13:54Lily, I can't let anyone bully you.
14:03The next day, Blake came to school with bruises all over his face.
14:09If I find out who beat me, I'll kill him.
14:12Forget your face for a second.
14:13I heard some billionaire's kid just transferred to our school from overseas.
14:17Who do you think it is?
14:19I looked up and met Sebastian's clean, calm eyes.
14:22He pointed at a problem on his worksheet.
14:25Then he smiled sincerely.
14:27Lily, can you explain this one to me?
14:31By late spring, graduation was only a month away.
14:34For the graduation showcase, Bella was in charge of costume sizes.
14:38She stood at the front of the classroom with a clipboard and asked everyone.
14:43When she got to me, she looked down at the form.
14:47Lily, should I put you down for XL or XXL?
14:50I looked up for my corrections.
14:53For some reason, I felt embarrassed saying it.
14:56I wear a small.
15:01The classroom went fire.
15:12Their shock told me no one had really noticed the change except Sebastian and Lucas.
15:17After months of eating healthy and walking laps, I had lost a lot of weight.
15:21Holy shit.
15:22Is that Lily?
15:23I told you.
15:24Her face was always pretty.
15:26I just had to lose the weight.
15:27Bella's face turned ugly.
15:29Ethan, who had not spoken to me in a long time, looked stunned too.
15:34That look made me even more uncomfortable.
15:36I was used to people staring at how much I ate, not at my face.
15:42Ethan coughed and turned to Bella.
15:43Isn't the lead singer spot still open?
15:45Maybe Lily should do it this year.
15:47Bella had always been the default lead for school performances.
15:50Bella's smile almost cracks.
15:53Lily's not as tall as me.
15:54I'm not sure she can pull off the dress.
15:57She's prettier than you.
15:59We can buy a different dress.
16:01Blake shot up from his seat.
16:03What the hell is that supposed to mean?
16:05You're defending fat girl now?
16:07She lost some weight and suddenly you like her?
16:12Ethan glanced at me.
16:13His voice dropped.
16:15Why not?
16:17Besides, she might not even look at me now.
16:20Something in that sentence must have hit Lucas.
16:22He suddenly threw the cup in his hand.
16:25The cup shatters against the wall.
16:29The whole room went silent.
16:31Lucas leaned back like nothing had happened.
16:34Sorry, my hand slipped.
16:36The interruption killed Ethan's mood to keep talking.
16:38When Lucas bent down to pick up the glass, a shard cut into his palm.
16:42He acted like he did not feel it.
16:44By the time he stopped in front of my desk, blood was already dripping from his fingers.
16:49His eyes landed on the box of bandages on my desk.
16:52His voice was low.
16:54Can I borrow one?
16:55It won't stop bleeding.
16:57Sebastian gave a soft laugh.
16:59Wow.
17:01You really know how to put on a show.
17:03I looked away from Sebastian.
17:05Then I shook my head at Lucas.
17:10No.
17:11Whether Lucas bled or not had nothing to do with me.
17:14I did not know why he had to come to me for this.
17:17Lucas did not look surprised.
17:19The color slowly drains from Lucas' face.
17:21When he spoke again, his voice was even softer.
17:24I get it.
17:28In the end, I became the lead singer for the graduation showcase.
17:31After that day, I experienced a lot of firsts.
17:35The first time someone called me pretty on the school subreddit.
17:38The first time a boy asked me out.
17:41The first time so many people were nice to me for no reason.
17:45Boys from other classes even came to our room between periods.
17:48Lily, I accidentally got an extra coffee. You want it?
17:51I refused out of habit.
17:52But Sebastian stopped the boy before he could leave.
17:55Lily, I think my blood sugar is low.
17:57I want the coffee.
17:59But I forgot my wallet.
18:00His calm voice did not sound convincing at all.
18:03It sounded like he was teasing me.
18:04It's okay. I have cash.
18:07I took out my little wallet and counted out $15 for the boy.
18:12Can I buy it? My friend wants it.
18:14The boy's face twisted.
18:19Being around Sebastian was easy.
18:22Even when more people started showing interest in me, I still only stayed close to him.
18:28Because of that, rumors about us slowly spread through the school.
18:31Did you hear?
18:32Lily Taylor, the new pretty girl from senior class, has weird taste.
18:35She likes Ghost Boy.
18:37I saw his face once. He's disfigured.
18:39It's disgusting.
18:40Yeah.
18:41I heard his face is covered in burn scores.
18:43Sebastian had never taken off his mask or cap in front of anyone.
18:47Even at lunch, he always ate alone.
18:50If not for me, he would not have been dragged into these rumors.
18:53So I started keeping my distance.
18:56Sebastian noticed.
18:57One morning before class, he stayed quiet for a long time.
19:01Then he suddenly said in a low voice,
19:04Lily, you can move your desk away.
19:06I froze and turned to him.
19:10What?
19:13He leaned back in his chair.
19:15His voice sounded tired.
19:17I'm used to being alone.
19:20You don't have to get tied to someone with a bad reputation.
19:24They all say someone ugly and disgusting like me doesn't deserve to be close to you.
19:29So maybe you should sit somewhere.
19:30Who said that?
19:31He said lightly.
19:32It doesn't matter.
19:33At first, Sebastian refused to tell me.
19:37After I asked several times, he finally gave me a few names.
19:41I remembered them.
19:42They were all boys who asked me to come out.
19:45Before, Sebastian had spoken up for me whenever people called me fat.
19:49Now it was my turn to do something for him.
19:52I found those boys and rejected them again.
19:54This time, I warned them.
19:56If they kept spreading rumors, I would report them for harassment.
20:02When Sebastian found out, he covered his eyes with one hand.
20:06Sebastian's shoulders shake silently.
20:08I guessed he was crying because he was touched.
20:10So I patted his shoulder gently.
20:12No one will say bad things about you anymore.
20:15Don't be scared.
20:16I made a reasonable conclusion.
20:18Sebastian was deeply moved.
20:23Nothing bad happened again before graduation.
20:26The only thing people gossiped about was Lucas and Bella breaking up.
20:30At lunch, Sebastian and I walked ahead.
20:33Behind us, Blake was trying to comfort Lucas.
20:35Don't take it too hard, man.
20:37There'll be someone better.
20:38Lucas walked past me without slowing down.
20:41His shoulder brushed mine.
20:43He looked straight ahead and said casually,
20:45Why would I be upset?
20:47I never liked her anyway.
20:51Sebastian glanced ahead.
20:52Then he smiled faintly.
20:54Lily.
20:56Sounds like there's a dog barking somewhere.
21:00By the time finals ended, I already knew I had done better than usual.
21:05The day after results came out,
21:07Ms. Carter asked Rachel to organize one last senior dinner.
21:10When I arrived, I saw Lucas outside the restaurant.
21:13The red spark flickered in the dark.
21:16His eyes stayed on me.
21:18I looked away as if I had not seen him.
21:20I tried to walk around him.
21:22Lucas grabbed my wrist.
21:23He pulled me back until my back hit his chest.
21:31Are you insane?!
21:33He caught my other wrist without even looking.
21:36Lucas looked down at me.
21:38No matter how I beg now, you won't give me another chance, right?
21:40I avoided his eyes.
21:42I don't know what you're talking about.
21:44Don't lie.
21:46Lucas smiled faintly.
21:47You know exactly what I mean.
21:50He pinched my chin and made me face him.
21:53You know, I said I never liked Bella because I wanted you to hear it.
21:56I went quiet. I stopped struggling.
21:58After a long moment, I looked back at him calmly.
22:01Yes, I know.
22:03I also know you liked me a long time ago.
22:05Otherwise, I wouldn't have been stupid enough to confess to you.
22:13The first time I tried to lose weight, I hid it from everyone.
22:17I ate almost nothing.
22:18I walked home every day instead of taking the bus.
22:21I wanted to lose weight as fast as possible.
22:23I wanted to wear the dress I had loved for months.
22:27Then I wanted to confess to Lucas.
22:29But Lucas noticed my pale face.
22:31He also noticed my hand pressed against my stomach.
22:34He had been about to leave for basketball with Blake and the others.
22:37I'm fine.
22:39Lucas did not believe me.
22:41He kept insisting on taking me to the hospital.
22:43I had no choice but to tell him I had been dieting.
22:46His frown deepened.
22:48He used the clinic as an excuse and signed us both out of school.
22:52Then he dragged me to lunch.
22:54He walked ahead holding my hand.
23:00His voice was cold.
23:01I care that much about what people think.
23:04Even starving yourself is fine.
23:06I was so hungry my head felt light.
23:08I barely heard him.
23:10I just nodded without thinking.
23:13Lucas was furious.
23:15His grip on my hand tightened.
23:17But after a long silence, he still gave in.
23:20He held back his anger and said...
23:22Can you stop starving yourself?
23:24If anyone makes another joke about your body, I'll shut them up.
23:28Is that enough?
23:29I smiled a little.
23:31Then I asked quietly...
23:32Don't you think I'm fat?
23:34Like this, I'm kinda ugly, right?
23:36Lucas stopped walking.
23:38He did not let go of my hand.
23:40He turned back and bent slightly.
23:42His eyes were focused.
23:43I looked.
23:45His voice was serious.
23:47You're cute.
23:49Everywhere.
23:50Lucas said it like he was giving an answer in class.
23:53That was the moment my crush on him grew out of control.
23:56I squeezed his hand back.
23:58For the first time, I tried to climb out of my own insecurity.
24:02Then, in the next second, he pushed me right back in.
24:07For a long time after that, I could not get up again.
24:14Lucas' lashes trembled.
24:16His grip on my wrists loosened.
24:18Yes.
24:19He lowered his eyes and gave a bitter smile.
24:21I liked you a long time ago.
24:25But being with you meant everyone would stare, joke, and laugh behind my back.
24:28So you don't get to ask me for another chance now.
24:33His confession came too late.
24:35I turned and walked away.
24:40After a few steps, I heard his voice behind me.
24:43It was low, almost like he was talking to himself.
24:47But I liked you.
24:48More than any of them ever did.
24:51I did not stop.
24:52I took a breath.
24:54Then I pushed open the restaurant door.
24:56Inside, most of our class was already there.
25:01Sebastian had not arrived yet.
25:03Ms. Carter smiled when she saw me.
25:04Lily, you did well.
25:06Come sit.
25:09Bella's face darkened the moment I walked in.
25:11Then she suddenly smiled.
25:14Ms. Carter, don't let Lily's grades fool you.
25:17She's not as innocent as she looks.
25:20I looked at her.
25:22What are you talking about?
25:25Come on, Lily.
25:26We've already graduated.
25:28It doesn't matter now.
25:30She was secretly dating someone before finals.
25:33I almost laughed.
25:35Before I could explain, Ms. Carter cut in.
25:37Who?
25:38Who is Lily's boyfriend?
25:41Bella smiled wider.
25:44Sebastian Cole.
25:48Bella continued her words.
25:50I mean, Lily acts like such a good girl.
25:52Who knew she had a thing for the weirdest guy in school?
25:55Ms. Carter's eyes widened behind her glasses.
25:59Bella looked even more pleased.
26:02He never takes off that mask.
26:04Maybe there is something ugly hiding underneath.
26:09But Lily, you don't have to deny him just because your boyfriend is ugly.
26:12When he gets here, why don't you ask him to take off that mask?
26:18Let everyone see those burn scars.
26:21Compared to her rumor about me dating Sebastian.
26:24I hated her insulting him more.
26:28Bella, have you ever seen scars on Sebastian's face?
26:31She choked.
26:32No, but then you made it up?
26:34Everyone says it.
26:37Everyone also says you only made cheer captain because your mom paid off the coach.
26:42So according to you, that must be true too, right?
26:45Bella panicked at once.
26:47Who the hell said that?
26:49Bella looked around the room.
26:51The restaurant got noisy.
26:53Another group of students crowded around Ms. Carter.
26:56Ms. Carter, I heard the principal say some billionaire's son was in our class.
27:00Who is it? Is he hot?
27:02He has to be hot, right?
27:03He's rich.
27:07Ms. Carter was holding two directions.
27:09The room grew louder and louder.
27:12Then the door opened again.
27:14Everything went quiet.
27:15Everyone looked toward the entrance.
27:31For a second, the whole room forgot how to breathe.
27:34His features were sharp and clean.
27:36The man was almost too good looking to be real.
27:38The girl closest to the door blushed first.
27:42um are you looking for someone miss carter finally let out a breath then she smiled
27:48you don't recognize him the person you were all talking about is standing right in front of you
27:54bella's voice cracked sebastian cole the billionaire's son what the hell so this
28:01gorgeous guy is sebastian the same sebastian who transferred back from overseas
28:08and apparently lily's boyfriend
28:10i felt like lightning had struck me on the spot sebastian looked a little unfamiliar without
28:19the mask then he raised one brow and looked at me fine i accept i stared at him except
28:34no way that's ghost boy i knew his eyes were too pretty for him to be ugly i thought that
28:40mask was
28:40hiding scars are we sure he's not some actor the dinner ended in scattered gasps and whispers
28:46on the way home sebastian answered every question i had at first he wore the mask because he had
28:53gotten into a fight before transferring the bruises on his face had not healed yet
28:59later he just got used to wearing it as for why he still took finals after being accepted early
29:06sebastian looked at me calmly to go to the same university as you girlfriend
29:12only then did i remember what miss carter had said at dinner you misunderstood bella was just
29:18this is my first relationship sebastian's eyes softened my parents were always working
29:24i grew up with nannies once they both missed my birthday so i ran away from home i thought someone
29:33would notice no one did after that i got used to it he said it like it was nothing but
29:41i still saw the shadow in
29:42his eyes my nose stung so even rich families could be this cruel sebastian noticed my eyes turning red
29:51don't feel bad for me this is the first time someone chose me and didn't give me up
30:05he sounded too used to begging for scraps of love that made it worse i pressed my lips together
30:13but the tears still fell don't cry lily
30:20then he suddenly returned to the earlier topic by the way what were you saying i misunderstood
30:26i froze the tears hung in my eyes i blinked fast after choking on my words twice i finally said
30:36stiffly nothing boyfriend if i denied it now sebastian might actually jump into the river
30:45he needed love too much and i could tell what i felt for him was different trying it would not
30:51hurt
30:55sebastian had already been accepted somewhere good but after i chose my university he gave up
31:00his spot and enrolled with me his cold work obsessed family barely reacted by the end of summer i had
31:08fully accepted that sebastian cole was my boyfriend he never pushed too far the most he did was kiss
31:14my forehead when he walked me home other than being clingy he had almost no flaws on the first day
31:21of
31:21college reality hit me fast out of my three roommates two ignored me when i said hello the last one
31:27was
31:27bella hart her cheer record had helped her get into the school compared to my bad mood bella looked almost
31:37what a coincidence not really most students from our high school had stayed in state for college
31:46running into old classmates on campus was normal but some coincidences were still annoying
31:56like that evening when sebastian and i were eating dinner he told me lucas was in his major i felt
32:02depressed for a few seconds then i remembered lucas was good at fighting i quickly warned sebastian
32:09don't get into it with lucas when you're alone you can't beat him
32:14if he gives you trouble call campus security sebastian was picking the carrots out of my food
32:19without looking up he asked slowly how do you know i can't beat him he had no idea how dangerous
32:25lucas
32:26was this concerned his personal safety so i put down my fork and said seriously don't act tough
32:34he's really good at fighting
32:38i've seen lucas fight a few times he barely lost maybe i sounded too serious sebastian seemed hurt
32:45after a long pause he pushed the food he had picked clean back to me then he nodded
32:50got it i'm useless i won't mess with him i forgot sebastian was sensitive my words had hurt him for
32:57the rest of dinner he barely spoke even though he was upset he still quietly peeled shrimp for me
33:02i bit my fork and looked at him carefully the guilt got worse
33:09after after dinner we did what college couples were supposed to do we went for a walk from the track
33:15to
33:15the quiet path by the campus lake i apologized to sebastian the whole way after a long time
33:23he finally softened a little lily comfort me i am comforting you not enough his breath brushed
33:34hot against my ear kiss me please his voice was so close that i shivered my breath hitched
33:44where both our voices had gone quiet sebastian tugged down the collar of his hoodie here i stood
33:51on tiptoe and kissed him sebastian held the back of my head leave a mark
34:01let everyone know i'm yours i followed what he told me to do
34:05i pressed my lips there then i bit down lightly
34:11my face burned red i pushed him away and lowered my head
34:15it felt nice
34:21next time leave a few more okay wasn't it supposed to go both ways why didn't he kiss me
34:28i could not bring myself to ask so i stared at him for a few seconds then i shook my
34:34head
34:35now hopefully he would understand what he had done wrong and next time he would offer to kiss me too
34:45after after college started i joined the volleyball club
34:49at first everything seemed normal then i realized coach was strange
34:53whenever he corrected my posture he stood too close lily raise your arms he came up behind me
35:00i could almost feel his breath near the back of my neck i stepped away quietly
35:07you can just tell me what to fix he did not take the hint he smiled but you're too stiff
35:13freshman
35:13then he suddenly flicked my forehead other girls wish i'd helped them myself
35:19during break bella sat beside him with her water bottle she raised her voice just enough for me to hear
35:26wow lily coach is so nice to you if you didn't already had a boyfriend you could totally consider
35:34him coach's face changed boyfriend you have a boyfriend
35:41i looked away from bella and nodded coach stared at me for a few seconds you have a boyfriend and
35:49didn't say anything
35:53what were you leading me on
35:56did you ask and honestly you're not exactly worth leading on before he could answer bella slammed her
36:03bottle down and stood up who do you think you're talking to your boyfriend isn't even on his
36:10level he's useless and creepy anger shot straight to my head before i could think i walked up to bella
36:18then i slapped her hard across the face i warned you not to insult sebastian again bella froze with one
36:26hand on her cheek you hit me the next second she lunged at me we crashed into each other all
36:32the
36:33anger i had swallowed for years finally came out three girls finally pulled me away coach looked at me
36:39coldly then he made his decision on the spot you started it stay after practice run drills until i say
36:52you're done bella dusts herself off and smiles like she has won
37:00under the evening heat i stayed on the court and ran drills alone
37:06by the time coach finally let me go everyone else had already left
37:11i dragged myself back to the dorm after i showered i was too tired to move i was also starving
37:19then sebastian called and made me come downstairs the moment i saw him i fell into his arms and started
37:26complaining halfway through i felt so longed that i cried sebastian i'm so hungry i barely ate anything
37:34today i really want sausage rolls sebastian went quiet too quiet he helped me sit on the bench nearby
37:45then he went to buy food for me after i finished eating he checked his phone his face showed nothing
37:53go back and rest lily i have something to do i'll come find you later i looked at
37:57him for two seconds then i lowered my eyes okay i'll head back
38:04then he turned away but i remembered the message i had accidentally seen on his phone
38:11sebastian that asshole from volleyball is at the pool hall come over
38:18i quietly followed him for some reason i suddenly thought of blake showing up with bruises back in
38:24senior year pieces of old memories came together in my head and they all pointed to one fact
38:30sebastian had been pretending to be weak this whole time that guess was confirmed when i stood outside the
38:36pool hall i looked through the glass sebastian stood beside a pool table coach and three other guys lay
38:44scattered across the floor sebastian did not have a scratch on him sebastian holds a broken pool cue in
38:51his hand the sharp wooden end hovered less than an inch from coach's eye coach
39:01you were interested in my girlfriend coach shook his head hard no no i wasn't i swear
39:11sebastian turned the broken pool cue lazily between his fingers my girlfriend had a rough day
39:17how are you planning to make it up to her coach trembled what do you want me to do
39:26sebastian seemed too bored to answer he shifted the broken key
39:31the sharp wooden end illness told coach's palm before it could go down i spoke
39:39sebastian my voice was calm his whole body froze
39:47until coach and the others ran out in a panic sebastian still did not turn around
39:52i walked over and crouched in front of him then i took the broken pool cue out of his hand
39:59sebastian lowered his hand his throat moved a few times before he spoke his voice was hoarse i'm sorry
40:06i stayed quiet after a long moment he asked again are you gonna break up with me
40:14i looked up at once his eyes were red something dark and restless moves in sebastian's eyes
40:21he looked nothing like the harmless sebastian who leaned on me and said his stomach hurt
40:26i sighed and curled my fingers into his palm only then did he calm down a little
40:31of course i'm not breaking up with you over this i just don't understand why you lied to me
40:38sebastian wrapped his hand tightly around mine his smile looked pale and bitter
40:44because i knew you didn't like me
40:48you only agreed to date me because you felt sorry for me
40:53if i didn't look pitiful enough you would leave then i held his face in both hands
41:00sebastian look at me i feel sorry for a lot of people but i don't date them just because they're
41:07pitiful liking someone isn't charity it's not something i hand out because someone looks sad
41:13he gripped my hand his eyes were almost stubborn you can't lie to me
41:24sebastian was wound too tight so i leaned in and kissed him lightly fine if he would not kiss me
41:31first
41:32i could do it if i'm lying i'll never get to eat sausage rolls again sebastian finally relaxed that night
41:40we walked through the quiet street outside campus i swung his hand as i walked listen
41:46sebastian we're actually perfect for each other you're really good fighting and i'm pretty good
41:51too today i basically pinned bella to the ground she barely touched me her face is going to be swollen
41:58for at least a week sebastian squeezed my hand next time you don't have to do it i'll handle them
42:09but bella is a girl sebastian answered without much thought
42:16i'll use a pink bat i burst it then i stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek loudly
42:24i like you so much sebastian cole
42:30sebastian was not the kind of guy lucas said he was
42:33he did not only solve problems with violence before going after coach he had already collected
42:39screenshots messages statements from other girls and proof that bella had cheated her way into her
42:46cheer scholarship then he submitted everything to the school the next day coach was suspended from
42:52the club team bella lost her scholarship she was removed from the cheer program everything happened
42:59so fast that i could barely believe it sebastian met my suspicious eyes then he lazily touched my lashes
43:05with one finger my mom graduated from the school she donated a library three years ago right now she's
43:11talking to the school about funding two new dorm buildings later i met sebastian's mother once on
43:18campus remembering his lonely childhood i carefully told her to be nicer to him that little brat told you
43:25we abandoned him i nodded sadly that year he was only seven years old we missed one birthday dinner
43:32because of work so he took his father's phone and texted our assistant told him to prepare the private
43:39rept he wanted to fly to melbourne alone when we caught him he was afraid his father would punish him
43:46so he hid in the hotel for two days and told everyone he had run away from home
43:52if the housekeeper hadn't found him eating cake in there your boyfriend would still be telling
43:56people he survived in the wild i stared at her so that was the tragic childhood he told me about
44:06a sudden a sudden laugh came from not far away the mood went cold lucas stood under a streetlight
44:11watching me so now you're into violence just because he beat up a few guys for you you're obsessed
44:21sebastian was still upset about me saying he could not beat lucas the second lucas opened his mouth
44:27sebastian's face went dark he started walking toward him i grabbed his arm in time
44:35sebastian is he even worth fighting lucas is obviously weaker than you if you fight him that's
44:40basically bullying you could make him cry without even trying
44:49what if he breaks down and calls the police coward you couldn't even like someone in public
44:58what makes you think you can compete with me lucas's face darkened he gave a cold smile and stepped
45:04forward i had no patience left i pulled the pepper spray from my back then i sprayed him straight in
45:09the face
45:13no one helped him he would probably need a while before he could open his eyes again for a second
45:18the way he stood there in pain reminded me of myself in the rain back then i had sat alone
45:24on
45:24the court no one was willing to help me now lucas looked just as helpless lucas seeing you like this
45:31makes me feel like i finally walked out of that rain i would not choke on that humiliation anymore
45:37i did not need him to suffer exactly the way i had suffered this was enough
45:45are you okay my premium class service wolf likes to engage in group sex in front of me
45:50fine the premium class service wolf i bought didn't like
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