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00:00You yourself started as an engineer, you then went to a business school, you then went into civil services.
00:06What drives it, whether it's a sense of unsatisfaction or the fear of failures?
00:11This question has been asked to me a hundred times now probably.
00:15Sir, you could have been, you know, at some top place in bureaucracy or management or this or that, whatever.
00:21Why are you speaking to, you know, people like us, sir?
00:25Look at the structure of the question itself.
00:28As young men and women, how do you convince yourself into the wrong jobs and the wrong relationships?
00:35How do you do that?
00:36You need to explain to me.
00:37I'm interested.
00:38I'm listening.
00:38Yeah.
00:40Or do you want to pack me off to New Delhi, to some secretariat?
00:46If your reality is so ugly and so much worth forgetting, why do you still sustain that reality?
00:54Let ugliness not become the normal.
00:56Let complexity not become usual.
00:59Why be that kind of coward?
01:02How do you convince yourself to not to do the right thing?
01:10Evening, sir.
01:11Sir, my question for you is that you yourself started as an engineer.
01:16You then went to a business school.
01:18You then went into civil services.
01:20So, such life-changing decisions at such certain point, when it comes into your mind, when you are in such
01:27situation, like what drives it?
01:30Whether it's a sense of unsatisfaction or the fear of failures which guides it?
01:35How does one fight that sense and how does one cater that hunger of unsatisfaction?
01:42Nothing specific that drives the right decision.
01:50Nothing specific at all.
01:52The question to be asked must be, what prevents you from taking the most obvious and simply right decision?
02:05My process was very simple.
02:08So, it would be quite a task explaining it.
02:13It's as simple as the blowing wind.
02:18The question to be asked is, how do you convince yourself to not to do the right thing?
02:25I mean, you know the situation of the world.
02:27You know how things are, right?
02:30And still, let's say, are you a student in the campus?
02:33Yes, sir.
02:34Which department?
02:35CSE.
02:35CSE.
02:36And you are offered a developer's job in a weapons manufacturing company at a fat package.
02:48And you accept the job.
02:52Now, that's the complicated decision you need to explain.
02:56What I did was so simple it cannot be explained.
03:00I was looking at myself.
03:01I was looking at the world.
03:02I was looking at the profiles being offered to me.
03:07I was in the IT sector for a while.
03:11Then, I went to the training academy as an officer trainee, as a would-be bureaucrat.
03:22And I saw how things happened there.
03:26Then, I was in three managerial jobs in three different sectors for one year each.
03:32I was looking at them.
03:33So, I was seeing how the world functions.
03:38And there is no mystery there.
03:41Having seen all of that, you realize what's the right thing to do.
03:44The question is upon you.
03:46How do you convince yourself to not to do the right thing?
03:55I was not going to write code for a shipping company.
04:00And that was the project I was put in.
04:04And IT was sunrise sector at that time, late 90s.
04:10Write code.
04:12And I knew what was being shipped.
04:15Why should I facilitate that?
04:17Why should I facilitate that?
04:20Yes, now you have cleared the UPSC, be a bureaucrat.
04:24And I could see what the bureaucrats have to obey.
04:31Whose commands have to be carried out.
04:33Why should I get into that?
04:37And then I was into consulting.
04:41And I could see, whose bottom line am I fattening?
04:45And why should I contribute to the coffers of some Lala Ji sitting somewhere?
04:55Then I was in the media.
04:56And I could see, what was being served there, and how, and with what intent.
05:02And why should I be a participant there?
05:04It was very simple.
05:05So when you say, kindly explain your extraordinary and heroic decision.
05:10I'm at a loss.
05:12Because there was nothing extraordinary in that.
05:14Nothing heroic in that.
05:15Nothing special there.
05:16It was all very obvious, very ordinary, very simple.
05:22For example, the question boomerangs.
05:24You explain how you manage to get into obviously complex and ugly things.
05:34How do you afford to do that?
05:37As young men and women, how do you convince yourself into the wrong jobs and the wrong relationships?
05:46How do you do that?
05:48You need to, you need to explain to me.
05:50I'm interested.
05:50I'm listening.
05:51Yeah.
05:52How do you do that?
05:55How do you do that?
05:57It's the thing about being human.
06:01If it's right, it's right.
06:03It cannot be denied.
06:05If it's right, if it's right, now leave it.
06:09One could be mistaken and that could be somewhat pardoned.
06:15But once you have seen something, how do you unsee it?
06:19How do you unsee it?
06:20Please tell me.
06:24Part of my decision to not to continue as a bureaucrat was taken during my visit to the training academy.
06:35Now that was my first visit.
06:37And there were a few things I couldn't have known without the visit.
06:42Now the visit showed me a few things and after that, how do I still continue?
06:45Having seen it, I cannot continue.
06:48Had I continued to be in dark, maybe I would have been in service for a year or two and
06:54then resigned.
06:56But now that I have seen, I have seen full stop.
07:02Do you get this?
07:05This question has been asked to me a hundred times now probably.
07:10And each time I face the same issue.
07:14What is there to explain?
07:17But what is there to explain?
07:24It's easy.
07:25It's obvious.
07:37Let ugliness not become the normal.
07:43Let complexity not become usual.
07:47When that happens,
07:50then simplicity starts looking abnormal.
08:02And beauty starts getting condemned.
08:06And labelled as distortion.
08:17So, if you were in those management jobs,
08:21please extend the story.
08:24Why did you quit all that
08:26and get into this Baba thing?
08:32Because I could not deceive myself into believing something else or something opposite.
08:45Because I could see
08:48that the engineering or management skills I had
08:54were available with hundreds of others or thousands of others of my calibre.
09:01But there was
09:03a vacancy elsewhere.
09:05There was a crying need somewhere else.
09:08And nobody was stepping forward to meet that need.
09:20If there is an important vacancy somewhere.
09:23If there is an important vacancy somewhere.
09:26And you feel it.
09:27Is there anything extraordinary in it?
09:30Nothing.
09:34Nothing.
09:37The question often comes
09:39not as curiosity
09:42but as allegation.
09:49You could have been anywhere
09:53at a very, very high place
09:55doing this, doing that.
09:56Why are you speaking to us retards?
10:01Does that tell about me
10:03or about the questioner?
10:07Look at the structure
10:08of the question itself.
10:10Right?
10:10Sir, you could have been
10:13at some top place
10:14in bureaucracy
10:15or management
10:16or this or that.
10:16Whatever.
10:17Sir, why are you speaking to
10:19people like us?
10:24Because
10:25I respect you a lot.
10:33Because I think
10:34speaking to you
10:35is more important
10:36than performing
10:38some bureaucratic function
10:40against
10:46being lauded
10:47by some illiterate minister.
11:10or do you want to
11:13pack me off
11:14to New Delhi
11:14to some secretariat
11:17or to the US
11:20Silicon Valley
11:24should I rather be there?
11:29then what's
11:30the astonishment
11:31about?
11:32I'm here for you.
11:34Why does that
11:35surprise you so much?
11:37Yeah?
11:44Yes.
11:50You're being preferred
11:51over so many others
11:52so justify that.
11:56Good evening, sir.
11:58My question to you is
11:59nowadays most of the people
12:01watch sports,
12:03movies,
12:03web series
12:04and other things
12:05and play video games
12:07just to get
12:08a sense of self-relief
12:10from their daily schedule.
12:12So these people
12:14do these people
12:15really get
12:16some self-relief?
12:17You tell me.
12:18Do I know?
12:19Or
12:19they are just
12:20getting distracted
12:21from their goals
12:22and targets?
12:23They are the best ones
12:24to answer this.
12:26See,
12:26they are not
12:27running away
12:28from a schedule
12:29or a routine.
12:31They are running
12:32away from themselves.
12:34You understand this?
12:38The ego
12:40is a master
12:41manipulator
12:44and the first one
12:46it deceives
12:47is
12:49itself.
12:51Not that you have
12:52a particular affinity
12:53to
12:55Instagram
12:55or to video games
12:57or the rest of it.
12:58No, no, no.
12:59You don't like that.
13:01You don't like that at all.
13:02Why do you think
13:03you endlessly scroll?
13:05The reason is simple
13:06because you don't
13:07like anything there.
13:08So the thumb
13:09keeps moving.
13:11Because you know
13:12you cannot stay
13:12at any of that.
13:13All of that
13:14is so repulsive.
13:15Hence the thumb
13:16keeps moving.
13:19Not that you like that.
13:22No,
13:22that's not the reason
13:23you go to that.
13:24Not like.
13:27But
13:28compulsory escape.
13:31It's 2 a.m.
13:32It's 3 a.m.
13:34You'll have to face yourself.
13:37It's still.
13:38It's quiet.
13:41And there is solitude.
13:46There is nobody
13:47your eyes can look at.
13:50No face visible.
13:52No hand to hold.
13:54And it's dark
13:55in your bedroom.
13:57And that's so terrifying
13:59because now
14:00that there is
14:01nobody else
14:02you'll have to be
14:03with yourself.
14:05That's very
14:06deadly.
14:08And that's the reason
14:09now you have to
14:10get into something.
14:12Something.
14:14Either you
14:15switch on the light
14:16and step out
14:17and then step
14:19into
14:19your hostel mate's room
14:23or you search for
14:25something to chew.
14:30or web series
14:31or
14:33or Instagram
14:36or you call
14:37somebody up
14:40or that final
14:41escape
14:42porn
14:45what do you think
14:46you really enjoy
14:47looking at those
14:48faces and those
14:49bodies and those
14:50repetitive actions
14:51come on
14:52what's there
14:56that's needed
14:57so that you can
14:58get away.
15:00Yes that offers
15:01relief
15:01but you do not
15:03know the nature
15:03of that relief.
15:05The nature of that
15:06relief is very ugly.
15:08The relief
15:09that you are
15:10getting there
15:10is relief
15:11against yourself.
15:15All that you
15:16are asking for
15:17is a moment
15:19in which you
15:19can forget
15:20your own reality.
15:21my question
15:22to you is
15:23if your reality
15:24is so ugly
15:25and so much
15:26worth forgetting
15:27why do you
15:28still sustain
15:29that reality?
15:32Why don't you
15:33change that
15:34thing called
15:34reality?
15:41If you
15:42must run away
15:43from something
15:44within
15:45why are you
15:46still keeping
15:46it within?
15:48Asking you
15:49please tell me.
15:51and you
15:52will never
15:52be able
15:52to run
15:53away from
15:53it.
15:54It's like
15:54having
15:55stinking
15:55socks
15:56or stinking
15:57underwear
16:00and you
16:01are running
16:01away from
16:01yourself
16:05thinking that
16:05the harder
16:06you run
16:07the more
16:08you will be
16:08able to
16:09escape the
16:10stink.
16:10Can you
16:10escape the
16:11stink?
16:12And in
16:13this case
16:13it is not
16:14the socks
16:14it is
16:15probably your
16:16own mouth
16:16that stinks
16:18by running
16:18hard
16:19will you
16:20be able
16:20to leave
16:21your mouth
16:21behind?
16:24Even the
16:25mouth is not
16:26a perfect
16:26example
16:27because the
16:27mouth can
16:28be cleaned
16:29with things
16:29external.
16:32It's your
16:33heart that
16:33stinks
16:35and by
16:36running
16:36hard
16:37will you
16:38leave behind
16:39your heart?
16:41So what's
16:42the point
16:42indulging in
16:43such escapes?
16:46Better face
16:47it.
16:49Face it
16:50like a
16:50human being.
16:53Cowardice
16:54is not
16:55just about
16:57kneeling
16:58down to
16:58external
16:59pressures.
17:01When you
17:02submit,
17:03when you
17:03surrender to
17:04an external
17:05force that
17:06obviously looks
17:07like cowardice,
17:08doesn't it?
17:09but a
17:10much bigger
17:11act of
17:12cowardice is
17:13when you
17:14surrender to
17:15your own
17:16inner lies
17:16and inner
17:17dishonesty.
17:20Why?
17:22Why be
17:22that kind
17:23of coward?
17:26And you
17:26know what's
17:27going on
17:27within,
17:28right?
17:28Nobody can
17:29know it
17:29better than
17:29you.
17:30It's your
17:31own
17:32courtyard,
17:34your own
17:34insides.
17:36Who can
17:36know of
17:37it?
17:37Only you.
17:40Just that
17:41when you
17:41are wandering
17:42outside of
17:43yourself,
17:44somebody can
17:45point the
17:46way to
17:46your residence.
17:47Yes.
17:48But only
17:48you have
17:50the rightful
17:51entrance to
17:52your residence.
17:53Only you
17:54live there.
17:55So only you
17:56can really
17:57know what's
17:58going on here.
17:59And you
17:59know.
17:59You already
18:00know.
18:00You already
18:01know.
18:02And that's
18:03the reason
18:03why you
18:04must rush
18:04to IPL.
18:07Tell me,
18:08do you
18:09own that
18:09franchise?
18:13Do you
18:14know anything
18:15about any
18:15of the
18:16players there
18:16really?
18:18Please tell
18:18me.
18:19Beyond the
18:19media gossip
18:20and the
18:21curated PR,
18:22do you
18:23really know
18:23anything?
18:24Please tell
18:24me.
18:26Still,
18:27their defeat
18:28feels to you
18:29like you're
18:29suffering.
18:32And you
18:33know it's
18:33stupid.
18:35You know
18:36nothing.
18:36You do
18:36not know
18:37the fund
18:39flow.
18:40You don't
18:41know the
18:43architecture of
18:45the entire
18:45organization there.
18:46You know
18:46nothing.
18:47You don't
18:48know what
18:48goes on
18:49behind the
18:50doors.
18:50You know
18:50of nothing.
18:52Yet you
18:52must rush
18:53to those
18:54absurd,
18:55meaningless
18:56matches.
18:56Why?
18:59That's
19:00cowardice.
19:01You're not
19:02running towards
19:02something.
19:03You're running
19:03away from
19:04something.
19:08Do you
19:09get that?
19:10Next time
19:11you find
19:12yourself
19:13indulging in
19:13all that,
19:14just ask
19:15yourself,
19:15as a young
19:16man,
19:16do I want
19:16to be a
19:17coward?
19:19Because it's
19:19not about
19:20entertainment.
19:22And it's
19:23duplicity to
19:24call this
19:24as distraction.
19:25This is
19:26not
19:26distraction.
19:27This is
19:27deception.
19:30We often
19:31say,
19:31oh I get
19:31distracted.
19:32No,
19:32you are not
19:32getting distracted.
19:34You are just
19:35deceiving yourself.
19:36It's a deliberate
19:37decision you are
19:38making.
19:39And it's a
19:39wrong decision.
19:40It's a decision
19:41from a false
19:42center.
19:44Be your own
19:45friend.
19:46Do not decide
19:46that way.
19:52Getting
19:52doing that.
19:59Just download
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