00:07To be continued...
00:38Hi, I'm the Legend of Carl, and I'm going to talk to you about Call of Duty Elite,
00:42and I'm going to be playing multiplayer rounds of Black Ops while I do it.
00:51Ugh, this is starting off well.
00:59So, Call of Duty Elite is like if organized sports and social networking had a baby,
01:03and they gave that baby a flamethrower.
01:06And...
01:07Really?
01:07A crossbow?
01:08What is this, medieval times?
01:10Oh, I see.
01:11Explosive tip.
01:13Touché.
01:14Okay, Call of Duty Elite is like...
01:17Okay, Call of Duty...
01:18Again?
01:19Call of...
01:20Call of Duty...
01:21Oh, man.
01:22Call of Duty...
01:22Man!
01:23Oh, come on!
01:24Okay, people.
01:25Read my lips.
01:26Oh, wait.
01:27Well, watch them move slightly and listen to my voice.
01:29Call of Duty Elite is basically going to change the way we play multiplayer.
01:33It's like somebody turned your headset into, like, a sticky grenade and blew your effing
01:37mind.
01:40You guys know what I mean by effing, right?
01:42Call of Duty Elite is an online service that lets you form groups, compete online, share
01:46films of your games, you study maps, weapons, and you can access it from tablets, smartphones,
01:51computers, I mean, whatever.
01:52Let me just give you a little open house on this, baby.
01:54Dude, who are you talking to?
01:56Everyone, because Elite works for Black Ops and beyond.
01:58Modern Warfare 3, everything.
02:00Oh!
02:01One of the sickest things about Elite is the group feature.
02:04You can start or join a group based on, like, well, basically anything.
02:07I mean, you can join a group of, like, guys from your alma mater, or if you're allergic
02:11to peanuts, you can find other guys that suffer from that affliction and can relate
02:14to your feelings of alienation.
02:15And when you're ready to step up the competition, you can join a clan.
02:18And those are guys that you play with based on, like, whatever.
02:21From your favorite style of play to your, like, favorite lavender scented hand soap.
02:29What?
02:30You got a problem with clean hands?
02:32Hey!
02:33You have a problem with people that like to wash their hands and then have a nice scent
02:36on them afterwards.
02:38Hey!
02:38To help you improve your game, Elite has live feeds and a ton of intel features that let
02:43you keep tabs on everyone's stats, which is awesome.
02:46Because you can see how you measure up against everybody else.
02:48And you can get detailed analysis of your performance with different game modes, weapons, and maps.
02:54So you can spot trends that let you know things like, like, radiation might be a good map for
02:59you to put away the short-range guns and go with a sniper rifle.
03:01So you can do this.
03:03Ah, sir, you have something on your face.
03:05I got it.
03:06You need a haircut.
03:08You're good.
03:09And believe me, this stuff will come in handy.
03:10Because once you get your group together, you compete in leagues and operations.
03:14And what's cool is, you're competing for actual stuff.
03:16What are you, just giving up on this headshot operation right now?
03:19Just one sec, okay?
03:21I'm not talking about, like, friendship bracelets, although those can be an appropriate way to
03:25express your friendship.
03:26I'm talking about real prizes.
03:28And you still get that warm, fuzzy feeling that comes from simply blowing a dude's head clean off.
03:33Yeah.
03:34Double rainbow.
03:36That was hardcore.
03:37No, seriously.
03:38There's like a double rainbow.
03:40Double rainbow on the way across the sky.
03:46And then there's the program guide.
03:48Okay, so this is your guide to everything elite.
03:51And since there's something going on 24-7, 365 days a year, think of it as an all-you-can
03:55-eat buffet, you know?
03:56You walk in, and there's a lot of weird people there, but they all seem happy.
04:00It's like organized sports, but if organized sports had automatic weapons.
04:05Imagine flag football with all your office mates, but if the annoying guy in HR is like,
04:09Hey, man, what are you doing this weekend?
04:11You can just shoot him in the neck.
04:14Are you back, or are you still talking to yourself?
04:16I'm not talking to myself.
04:18I'm helping others.
04:19And then there's the theater feature, which lets us share some of our finest moments.
04:23I even posted a video where my character does this dance I love.
04:26You got the touch.
04:30You got the power.
04:37Yeah, I'm going to take that down pretty soon.
04:40I posted other videos as well, like better ones.
04:43It's real easy, and you can share them with other elite members, and the world of Facebook, YouTube,
04:48you know, so they can rate it, vote for their favorite videos, or just rip them apart.
04:52And there's a ton of other stuff, but right now, I've got a lot to process emotionally.
04:55And my therapist said it's better if I write it out.
04:58So, why don't you watch as I unload this gratuitously violent ending.
05:02Hey, bomb strike, waiting for the mark.
05:08When you're alone, and life is making you lonely, you can't always go downtown.
05:17When you've got worries, all the noise and the hurry seems to help, I know.
05:23Downtown, just listen to the music of the traffic in the city.
05:29Finger on the sidewalk, where the neon signs are pretty.
05:33How can you lose the lights?
05:40Yee-haw!
05:42Look up, bitch!
05:47Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
05:50No final place for you.
05:53All right!
05:54That saved all of you!
05:56Flying away towards the sun.
06:00Don't fly too high, or I'll burn to death.
06:04Flying away to the sunset.
06:06Hey, TJ!
06:07All right, I'll be down in a second.
06:10Down.
06:11Ugh.
06:15Yeah, no, I fed the cat.
06:22Whoa, legals always circling like the type of vultures, but instead of eating carcasses, they eat all our fun.
06:30Am I where I think I am?
06:32Is this Modern Warfare 3?
06:33Whoa, hey, uh, you can't be here.
06:36But, but wait, I have so many questions.
06:38We can't be here.
06:41We can't be here, okay.
06:41Oh, fuck.
06:41The runaway.
06:43We can't be here.
06:43This party can go.
06:43I wanna go let's go.
06:43Is this another party?
06:43This party you say, pull
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