00:00But I want to personally congratulate CNN's Caitlin Collins on receiving her award.
00:07It was all about me. It's a fake. She shouldn't get the award. It was a fake,
00:11but I didn't mind. I said, Caitlin, congratulations. But it was fake. There's
00:16no question about it. But she's a young, attractive woman. She never smiles. I said,
00:22Caitlin, do you ever smile? Smile. You have a nice position. You're at CNN Fake News.
00:28You should be a happy person. So smile, Caitlin. Just smile. But we attack. And I thought Caitlin had
00:35really made it big with a major new sponsorship. But then I informed her that it wasn't her
00:43on the Bud Light can. It was Dylan Mulvaney. And Dylan Mulvaney cost Bud Light $35 billion in market
00:55cap. That was the worst commercial ever made, by the way, for those few people that want to hear
00:59that. Most people don't care. But I would. I wouldn't want to hire Dylan anytime soon.
01:04Think of it. They hired Dylan Mulvaney. And their market cap has gone down by $35 billion. Who wrote
01:11that commercial? And then you have writer Josh Dorsey. He also received. He's been killing me
01:17for years. No, he's been. And yet tonight, he shakes my hand. He hugs me. Everything nice.
01:22He kills me. Josh is amazing. He writes more stories than any human being. There's nobody that
01:30writes more than Josh. He'll write four stories about me a day, all different subjects. I mean,
01:35I had the other day three stories and one on the, he was upset about this. One was on page
01:41seven.
01:41Three were on page one. They were all written by Josh. But he's hit the big time. And he's a
01:47workhorse. And yet, he's almost unhirable. You know, you hired, he's just one of these guys.
01:53Wall Street Journal's lucky to have him. But you really, it's unbelievable. He's almost unhirable.
02:00CNN is also here. And I'm very disappointed they didn't bring fake Tapper because he's had a rough
02:08couple of years. Fake has. You know, he calls me up every once in a while. If I pick it
02:11up,
02:12you know, I pick up my phone. I used to go to this young lady. I'd say, any calls from
02:16the press?
02:17No, sir. I said, oh, now I'm the president of the United States, right? I'd say to Stephen Chung,
02:24is Stephen here someplace? Where's Stephen? He's one of the toughest human beings I've ever met.
02:29Don't ever wrestle, Stephen. You'll be in big trouble. But I say, Stephen, let me ask you,
02:34did the press call? No, sir. You know, when I was a developer, I'd get a call every half an
02:40hour.
02:40For whatever reason, I always got disproportionate press. So I said, Stephen, nobody called? No,
02:46sir. Two hours later, I say, hi, Steve. How are we doing? Everything good? Anybody call?
02:51No, sir. No press calls. I say, I'm president. Nope. They never call. So this went on for about a
02:56week. I'd say, Caroline, did the press call? No, sir. No calls. I said, nothing. It's over a week.
03:03I haven't received a call. So I said, you know what I'll do? I'm going to give the press my
03:07phone
03:07number. That was the stupidest thing I ever did. I'm getting a call every 3.7 minutes.
03:15Stephen, I don't know where the hell you've been, but the press calls, I'm getting calls. Ring,
03:21ring. I was with somebody today. He said, I've never heard a phone ring as much. It's fresh. Now,
03:26I look at the thing and usually just delete, delete, delete. Every once in a while,
03:31it'll be one of the people in this room that I like and I'll pick it up like this one
03:36right here
03:37calls me on occasion, right? She'll call me and she says, hello, sir. How are you? We want to talk
03:43about some horrible subject, like a horrible, depressing subject. I say, Jackie, I don't want
03:48to talk about it. Congratulations, however, on your new marriage, but I don't want to talk about it.
03:53But it's true. And people call me now. And so for weeks I go, no calls. And I learned then
04:01that
04:02both of them, they feel that I'm doing a great job and they feel I'm above it all.
04:07And that no person, hundreds of people call no person is good enough to talk to Trump.
04:14And so we don't even bother telling you. That's not the way it works, Caroline.
04:18You have to let me know, because sometimes I do want, I do like to speak to the press.
04:23So I've got to tell you something.
04:23And so I've got this.
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